On The Edge
by QuietlyScreaming
Summary: When you're living life on the edge, will you risk it all for love? Just your average story about sex, drugs, and rock n roll. Rated T-M
1. It's Been A While

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I went back and forth on selecting a rating for this story. For the most part, it falls under T, but it will have it's fair share of M chapters as well. There will also be strong language sprinkled like confetti throughout. You've been warned. **

**DISCLAIMER:**** I do not own ZOMBIES or any of the characters associated with it. The same goes for any songs ****from various artists I use.**

* * *

**On The Edge**

**Chapter 1**

**IT'S BEEN A WHILE**

"Oh, hell no!" Lacey screamed as she stalked towards Macey. "Hell. Fucking. NO!"

Tracey and Stacey backed slowly away from them. There was nothing they could say or do to save their bandmate at this point.

"You're out, Macey! Do you hear me! You'll never play with The Acey's ever again! I don't care what crappy no-name town we're in! I want you off this bus NOW!"

"Lacey..." Tracey whispered pleadingly. "We need a bass player!"

She spun around fast, her blonde ponytail hitting him in the face as she did. "Do. Not. Start with me, Tracey!"

He held his hands up in surrender, moving aside so she could storm past him to the front of the bus. A moment later, they were coming to a stop.

Bucky poked his head out of his bunk. "Why are we stopped?" he asked sleepily. "I said no stopping until we reached Seabrook."

"Lacey's lost it Bucky! You need to fix this!" Stacey warned in a hushed voice. "She's literally throwing Macey's stuff off the bus!"

"Jesus Mahalia Christ!" He jumped out of his bunk and ran towards the door. "Lacey! What are you doing?!"

"I want her gone, Bucky! Either she goes or I'm pulling the entire band off this tour! I am not fucking around!"

"We're only a month in!"

"I don't care! This is all your fault! You're the one that brought Zombies in on this!"

Bucky threw his hands up in frustration. "What does any of this have to do with them?!"

"Macey slept with Zed..." Tracey whispered from behind him.

Bucky sighed in defeat. "Macey...I'm sorry. You signed the agreement long before the tour started."

"But...but..." Macey sniffled. Her short red hair falling into her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I'll get you a ticket back to New York as soon as we get to New Hampshire."

"She is NOT getting back on this bus!" Lacey sneered.

Bucky turned and looked at her. "We can't leave her on the side of the road."

"Like hell, we can't!"

"Lacey! Enough!" he snapped. "Everyone back on the bus! We're back on the road in five!" he said as he pulled out a cigarette and started to walk off.

"Where are you going?!" Lacey demanded, crossing her arms definitely.

"I'm going to attempt to salvage this tour and find a new bass player..."

"Good luck..." Stacey mumbled under her breath as she bent down to help Macey pick up her clothes from the side of the road. She looked at her now-former band mate sadly. "You're going to be hard to replace."

Lacey rolled her eyes. "We only play with Acey's, Bucky..."

"Lacey!" He spun around on his heels and stormed back to where she stood. "I have had just about enough of your crap! This is your last chance! I don't care if you were my first client or not!" He took a deep calming breath. "Now...I have someone in mind, and coincidentally enough her name does end in "a-c-e-y", but I swear to God...if you mess this one up..."

Tracey stepped in between them. "She'll behave. Won't you Lacey..."

She threw her hands in the air. "Fine. Whatever….she better not be a blonde though."

Bucky rolled his eyes and took a deep drag from his cigarette before walking off. When he was a safe distance from the bus he pulled his phone out. "Come on sis...pick up the phone."

* * *

Clunk...buzz...buzz...buzz….

Addison felt around next to her searching for the source of the obnoxious buzzing. She grabbed her phone and hit the button hanging it up.

Clunk…buzz...buzz...buzz…

She groaned and picked it up. "Hello?" she answered groggily as she tentatively cracked open one eye.

"Where the fuck have you been? I've been trying to call you since last night!"

She silently smiled. "Good morning to you too, Bartholomew."

"Addison, I swear..."

"Relax...and could you not yell so loud?"

Bucky sighed on the other end of the line. "Two questions...Are you home and are you sober? 'Cause we need to talk."

Addison sat up and looked around. "To answer your questions, no and kind of."

"Where are you?"

Addison looked around again, picking up the arm that was wrapped around her bare waist and moved it off of her. "At a friends house."

"And do you know this friends name?"

She scoffed. "Not that it's any of your concern, but yes...of course I do...it's Tim...or is it Tom...no, that's not right either..." she whispered as she stood up and started to retrieve her clothes from around the room.

"Addie..." Bucky sighed.

"I don't need a lecture B."

"I know."

Addison slipped her dress over her head and grabbed her shoes, quietly heading for the door. "So what did you need to talk about?" She glanced at the table in the foyer and read the name on a piece of mail. "Tripp! That's it!"

"What?"

"His name is Tripp...sorry, now what do we need to talk about?" she said as she walked into the bright Los Angeles sun.

"How are your bass skills?"

"You called me at..." she pulled her phone away and glanced at the time. "8 am to ask me how my bass skills are? Really?"

"Well it's already 11 here and I've been trying to call you since 4, so just answer the question."

"You know I can play, Bucky. I can pretty much play any instrument you put in front of me. Why are we asking questions we already know the answers to?"

He let out a soft laugh. "What are you doing for the next few months?"

"Um...pretty much what I always do?"

"So drinking like a fish, hooking up with random guys, hiding away from everyone and everything?"

Addison nodded contemplatively. "Basically...I mean, I don't discriminate...doesn't have to be a guy..." The line was silent for a moment before she quietly giggled, "I can hear you rolling your eyes."

"Yup." He took a deep breath. "Addison, I'm just going to cut to the chase. I need your help."

"Okay, now you're getting all serious on me. What's going on."

"One of the bands I manage is in serious need of a new bass player like immediately and we're currently in the middle of a tour."

Addison stopped walking. "And you want me to fill in?"

"Yeah."

She sighed deeply and dropped to the concrete, resting her head against a lamp post. "B...You know I don't perform anymore."

"Addie, I wouldn't be asking if I wasn't desperate."

"Bucky, I can't."

"Adds...please. You're the most talented musician I know!"

"I want to help, I really do. But I can't. You know this!" she pleaded.

"I really didn't want to have to do this..."

"What?"

"You owe me."

Addison closed her eyes and took a shaky breath. "Fine," she whispered.

"What was that?"

"I said fine. When, where, how long."

"We're in New Hampshire right now, we've got a gig in this small town called Seabrook tomorrow night. How soon can you get here?"

"I don't know. Probably tomorrow afternoon if I can book something on such short notice."

"Can't you just take the jet?"

"Again with the questions you already know the answers to."

"Please…."

Addison sighed. "I hate you."

"No, you love me and you know it. Now answer the question."

"Yeah, I can be there today then."

"Thank you! You are a lifesaver!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah...still hating you right now."

"Oh! And one more teensy-tiny little thing."

"What now?"

"You can't be a blonde."

"WHAT?!"

"The lead singer is a little territorial over her hair color."

"Bucky...you're pushing it. I don't do dark hair."

"I don't care what color it is. Just not blonde."

She clenched her free hand and counted backward in her head to calm down. "Fine. But now I won't be there until late tonight. I apparently have to call Bree. Is there anything else you want to drop on me?"

"Oh, um...the tour still has five months."

Addison closed her eyes again and took a deep calming breath. "Great...Now I have to sublet my apartment as well."

"Why are you even renting an apartment? The house is yours and is literally just sitting there empty."

"Ask me one more stupid question, I swear…"

"Fine."

She took another deep breath. "Bucky..."

"Yeah?"

"We're even after this."

"If this tour goes well, I'll owe you."

"Damn right..."

"I'll send you their playlist for tomorrow's show. Do you need the chords or is the audio enough?"

"Audio is fine."

"Thanks again, Addison."

"You're welcome. I'll call you when I leave." She hung up the phone and opened her eyes. She exhaled loudly and stood up, straightening her dress before requesting an Uber back to where she had left her car the night before.

When she finally got to her car, she pulled her phone out and dialed her best friends number. She cursed when it went straight to voice mail, she hated having to call the salon and deal with the sickeningly sweet receptionist. It just wasn't normal for someone to be that happy all the time. Begrudgingly she dialed the number to the salon.

"It's a great morning at Riche Salon & Spa! Anna speaking, how may I assist you today."

"Hi, Anna...Is Bree available?"

"May I ask who's calling?"

"Meg Jacobs."

"One moment Ms. Jacobs..."

Addison rolled her eyes. A moment later the line picked back up.

"Hey girl!"

"Hey, Bree… please tell me you can come over to do my hair like now!"

"Sorry, Adds. I can't leave the salon today. We're booked solid."

"Nooooo," she whined. She quickly made an illegal u-turn in the middle of the street. "I have to leave for a few months and I need to not be blonde and you know I'd never let anyone else touch my hair!"

"Wait...so many questions….Where are you going, why so long, and why can't you be a blonde?"

"Going on tour to help Bucky. Apparently, the lead singer has issues with hair color."

"You? On tour?"

"Yes."

"With your former step-brother?"

"Yes."

"Girl, just come in now, I'll do your hair in my office. I have so many more questions."

Addison laughed. "I figured you would."

"See you in a few Adds."

"I'm already parking," she said as she pulled into the lot on the side of the salon.

When she walked up to the door, Bree was holding it open. "Nice outfit," she said motioning to the short leather dress and black heels that Addison was

wearing. "Celebrating selling another song?"

Addison shrugged and shook her head. "No, just a typical late night, early morning."

Bree smiled and rolled her eyes. As they walked into the posh salon, Bree stopped by the receptionist. "Anna, please rearrange my first few appointments for the morning, I'll be with Ms. Jacobs for a few hours in my office."

"It would be a pleasure, ma'am."

"Thank you."

As they walked off Addison leaned over and whispered. "Please tell me she's like that because you pay her to be."

Bree laughed. "What?"

"Nobody is that perky...it's just not normal..."

"Says the former cheerleader."

"Cheerleader or not, the only thing about me that was ever that perky were my tits." She looked down her dress and smiled. "Thank God I still have that going for me."

Bree just smiled and continued to lead them through the salon and up the stairs. When they were finally behind the closed doors of her office, Bree turned to Addison. "So...How long are you planning on giving my staff a fake name for?"

Addison shrugged her shoulders. "Forever?"

"Girl, you can't keep hiding from everyone."

Addison nodded. "Pretty sure I can."

"Addie...it's been two years. The last time anyone else saw you other than me was the funeral. You changed your number, you've got no social media...You've managed to completely disappear while still staying in town...This can't be healthy."

Addison shrugged again. "We're all going to die at some point."

Bree threw her hands up in surrender. "Fine…I've given you my lecture for the day. So, if we're not doing blonde, what are we doing?"

"Nothing dark."

"Oh God no! I'll never let you make that mistake again."

"Other than that...whatever you want to do. You're the artist around here."

"Do you trust me?"

"What is with everyone asking obvious questions this morning?"

Bree gave her an odd look.

"Sorry...Bucky..." she offered in explanation, waving her own comment off. "But, yes...I trust you...obviously."

"Good...now sit your way too skinny butt in the chair and let me get to work."

* * *

"Ms. Donnelly...we're about to land."

Addison opened her eyes and sat up. "Thank you, Nancy," she said politely to the older flight attendant.

"Oh, no need to thank me, dear. It's been so good to see you again."

She smiled and nodded. "You too." Addison looked around the interior of the small plane, fighting off the tears that threatened to fall. She closed her eyes once more and took a deep breath. When the plane came to stop, the flight crew got to work opening the door and lowering the steps. Addison took one final sad look around before walking out the door. The moment she stepped out into the cold New Hampshire air, she shivered and pulled her black leather jacket on.

"Addie!"

She looked up to see Bucky walking towards her.

"Well if it isn't my favorite step-brother, once removed," she smiled as he pulled her in for a hug.

"Good to see you too," he laughed. "White?" he held the end of her hair up, examining it.

Addison shrugged. "You said anything but blonde."

Bucky smiled and shook his head. "It looks good on you."

"Bucky, everything looks good on me."

"A pizza would look good on you. Skinny enough? I can almost see your ribs."

"Note to self: No crop tops in this crappy cold weather or around bossy older brothers," she mumbled elbowing him in the stomach. "And I can't help it if I've lost more weight. You know songwriters aren't exactly rolling in dough."

"Addison...You have money. You don't have to live off of royalty fees."

"No, my family has money. I haven't done anything to deserve it."

He shook his head. "Still the same...Come on, we've got a lot to talk about on the drive over to Seabrook." He led her to the waiting rental car and popped the trunk for her luggage.

When they were finally on the highway, Bucky looked over at her. "So I know I owe you an explanation, and I know I'm asking a lot of you..."

"Understatement...You know the last time I was on stage was at the memorial service, right? You remember what happened, right?"

"I know...I'm sorry I'm making you do this. I know bringing everything up was a low blow."

"As long as you acknowledge it..."

"I'm sorry, but Addie...I really need this tour to work out. It's my one shot. If this doesn't work out...Well, my Dad's already planning on me joining the family business in an official capacity."

Addison cringed. "I so can not see you as the mobster type."

"My point exactly. He bought the bus and gave me his blessing, but he made it very clear...this was my one shot."

"I get it."

"Thank you."

"But I'm not singing...Like at all."

"That won't be a problem. Lacey, who's the lead singer, doesn't share the spotlight. Well, except occasionally with Tracey, and even he only gets one song per set."

"So what's the deal with this band anyway? Their songs aren't that great, honestly. I could write something better in my sleep...pretty sure I have, now that I think about it."

"That's because you're an amazing songwriter and musician."

"Don't butter me up."

He smiled and reached over to ruffle her hair. "You picked up the songs ok?"

Addison swatted his hand away and flipped down the mirror to fix her hair. "Yeah...they weren't exactly complex. So start explaining...Why are you wasting your one shot on them? Pouty wannabe rock bands like this are a dime a dozen, B."

Bucky sighed. "Lacey was the first person to give me a chance."

She rolled her eyes. "And you're nothing if not loyal."

"Exactly."

"So why do they suddenly find themselves in need of a bassist?"

"That gets a little complicated. So… The Acey's are, or better said, were, Lacey, Tracey, Macey, and Stacey. Lacey sings, Tracey plays guitar, Macey played bass, and Stacey is the drummer."

Addison stared at him. "Seriously? The Acey's? And they actually all have names that end the same?"

"They're quite proud of that fact."

"Great...Let me guess, I'm about to get a new name."

Bucky laughed. "You know it. How does Casey work for you?"

Addison shrugged. "Whatevs. It's not like I don't use a fake name all the time anyway. What's one more thrown in the mix… Do I have a last name?"

"Eh...I'll let you pick it."

"Fine. Just go with Jacobs. I already use that one."

"Why you just don't use your real name..."

She threw her head back and sighed. "I've told you a hundred times. Donnelly holds way too many expectations. Expectations that I'm never going to live up to. I had my shot, and I blew it. You of all people should understand that."

"You know I don't agree with you, but I get it," he whispered sadly. "Anyway...the other band on the tour is Zombies."

"Zombies?" she shook her head and chuckled. "You have two real winners B."

Bucky laughed. "Don't be such a brat."

"Don't know any other way to be," she smiled sweetly. "But, sorry...continue."

"As I was saying...Zombies is the other band on tour. They're really good. They're just missing one small thing to keep them from really hitting it big."

"And what would that be?"

He sighed. "Wish I knew...But yeah...Zed, Bonzo, and Eliza..."

Addison suddenly started to have a coughing fit. "I'm sorry, did you say Zed? Does he have a last name?" she subconsciously ran her tongue along the inside of her lip and bit it hard.

"Zed Necrodopolus, he's the singer and guitarist. Why?"

"Just not a very common name," she whispered as she let out a loud sigh of relief.

"Then there's James Bonzo, he plays bass, and Eliza Russel who is by far the most amazing drummer I have ever seen or heard. I swear she's like a female John Bonham…."

She smiled. "Sounds like someone has a crush."

"Actually, and this does not leave this car...We've been together for about a year."

"Really?!" she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him, making the car swerve. "I'm so happy for you, B!"

"Ah! Don't do that! I'm driving here!" He said as he straightened the car back out.

"Oops!"

Bucky shook his head and smiled over to her, "Thanks, Adds. But seriously...no one can know. I don't want anyone thinking I'm playing favorites. It's totally unprofessional to be dating a client, to begin with."

"Ease up, you're allowed to have a life and be happy. Your secret is safe."

"Thank you. Speaking of secrets. You and me...I don't want them knowing we're related."

"Technically we're not."

"You know what I mean."

Addison shook her head. "So, anyway...why the need for a new bassist?"

"Oh yeah, so Lacey and Zed had a thing at some point in the past that did not end well. She says he stole one of her songs, he says she's the one the swiped it. Needless to say, it's been the source for a lot of arguments."

"New bassist…."

"Well, as I said earlier, Lacey doesn't like to share the spotlight...or anything else for that matter. That includes Zed. She had me draft a contract for every member of The Acey's stating that they would not sleep with him."

"And Macey did."

"Yup," he said, popping the p at the end. Bucky took a deep breath and pulled over to the side of the road and put the car in park. He turned in his seat and looked at her. "Addison, I'm saying this with every ounce of brotherly love I have...Do not sleep with him. Please. Zed is your type through and through. He's crazy talented, tall, dark, handsome, and wears leather pants."

"Sounds about right," she said with a smile.

"But he's also trouble. He's got more issues than Vogue and will sleep with anyone with a pulse….Come to think of it he's like the male version of you."

"You say the sweetest things, brother dear."

"But seriously, I know you, and I know him. Do not sleep with him. Please."

"Bucky, despite what you may think, I can control myself. I may not always choose to, but it can be done. I'll keep my panties on."

"Promise?"

"I promise...unless I need to do laundry."

"Not funny, Adds."

She smiled and winked. "It was a little funny."

"Maybe a little," he cracked a smile and pulled her in for a hug. "I missed you."

"I missed you too. Now get back on the road so I can go meet the people I'm going to be stuck with for the next few months."

Bucky gave her a salute and pulled back onto the highway.

* * *

An hour later they pulled up to the venue that the bands would be performing at the next night. Bucky helped her grab her luggage and they started off towards the bus parked in the back.

"Remember, we're not related, I met you through a mutual acquaintance at an industry party in LA," he whispered as they approached.

"Because I'd actually show my face at one of those things," Addison sneered.

"Just go with it, please."

"Fine."

"And your name is..."

"Casey Jacobs. Bass player extraordinaire."

"That's my girl," Bucky teased, throwing her a wink. "You ready?"

"Bucky...wait..." Addison said, stopping and dropping her bags.

"What's wrong?"

"What if I can't do this? I haven't performed in front of anyone in years. The last time..."

He pulled her in for a hug. "I know. I'll make it as easy as possible for you. I promise."

"I swear if I have a panic attack..."

"I'll be on the side of the stage right by you."

"You better be, Bartholomew."

"I will...Now no more calling me that, got it," he teased, tickling her bare stomach. He sighed and glared at her. "At least with you on this tour I can make sure you eat."

"I eat."

Bucky narrowed his eyes making her roll hers.

"Whatever you say, B."

"Much better. Now let's go introduce you." He opened the door to the bus and climbed up the steps, turning to help her up. "Children, I'm home!" he called out.

"We're back here!"

They made their way down the narrow hall to the back room.

"Where are the other three?" Bucky asked looking around?

"Who gives a shit? Do I look like their keeper?" Lacey said not bothering to look up from the copy of Rolling Stone that she was reading.

"Nice, Lacey..." Bucky said rolling his eyes. "I was hoping to introduce everyone all at once."

"Well, we're all here!" Tracey smiled as he hopped off the small back counter. "I'm Tracey, I play guitar and on occasion, keyboard."

"Nice to meet you, Tracey. I'm Casey." She held her hand out and shook his.

"You are too cute! By the way...LOVE the boots...are those the new Ferragamos?"

Addison looked down to her knee-high leather boots and smiled. "As a matter of fact, they are."

Tracey dropped to his knees to admire them. "They're even better in person..."

"You'll have to excuse our very forward, very gay, very fashion-obsessed friend here," Stacey laughed as she walked over. "Tracey, get up before you scare her off." She looked back up and held out her hand and shook Addison's. "Stacey, drums."

"Casey, bass."

Lacey was the last to stand and walk over. She eyed Addison from head to toe. "How can you even afford those as a musician?"

Addison shrugged. "My priorities may be a bit messed up. I'd starve if it meant I could buy more shoes."

"Seriously?! Is that why you're so skinny?" Bucky said in shock. He suddenly remembered himself and backed up a step. "I mean, you just look a lot slimmer since the last time I saw you."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Glad I made such an impression at that party."

"So, Casey," Stacey said as she pulled Tracey to his feet. "What's your story, why the life of a struggling musician, why bass?"

Addison smiled. "For me, music is life. That amazing ride you catch when the notes and rhythms snap into place and connect, shaping audio beauty….It's about freeing the lyrics in my heart and watching them take root and blossom into something bigger..." she stopped and looked at Bucky before laughing, "And if you've ever sat on a monitor and hit a low C...you'll know why I chose bass. Best. Orgasm. Ever!"

Tracey and Stacey laughed while Bucky and Lacey rolled their eyes.

"Welcome to The Acey's, Casey!" Tracey threw his arms around her and hugged her tight. He turned his face towards Bucky and whispered. "I like this one!"

"I knew you would," he said with a large smile.

"She's not an Acey until I say so," Lacey sneered. "Can you even play? I'm not letting anyone into this band who can't handle my songs."

"Oh, you write the songs too?" Addison asked overly sweetly.

"Yeah."

Addison shook her head and smiled. "Is there anywhere I can plug in?"

"Amps over there," Lacey said jerking her head to the far corner.

"I'm going to grab my bass...I'll be right back." She turned and walked back towards the front of the bus. Bucky was on her heels and grabbed her arm.

"Do not turn this into a pissing contest," he whispered in warning.

Addison smiled sweetly up to him. "Whatever are you talking about?" she asked innocently.

"I know you… She doesn't know that you can play, and she doesn't know you write."

"She's being a grade A bitch."

"That's just Lacey."

She huffed. "Fine."

"Thank you."

Addison pulled away and flipped him off before walking back down the hallway. She walked over to the amp and plugged in. Her fingers flew across the strings as she played a series of complex chords and rhythms. When she stopped the whole room was silent for a moment before Tracey started to slow clap.

"Dammmmmmmn girl!"

Stacey smiled and clapped as well. "I didn't think anyone could replace Macey, but I'm putting my money on you."

They all looked at Lacey.

"Welcome to The Acey's," she said walking up to Addison and shaking her hand.

"Wow! From what I heard outside it sounds like you guys finally acquired some talent!" A male voice said as he walked into the room.

Addison froze. She'd recognize that voice anywhere. She ran her tongue along the inside of her lip and closed her eyes. Thankful that her back was towards the door.

"Play nice, Zed," Bucky warned.

"I always do," he said in a cocky tone.

"Right….Anyway, Zed, Eliza, Bonzo...this is Casey Jacobs. She'll be joining the tour as the Acey's new bassist."

Addison slowly turned around. Her breath caught when she saw him. He was taller and more muscular than she remembered, and the green hair was definitely new, but those eyes...those damn eyes...they were definitely the ones that she fell hard and fast for back in high school. She watched as sudden recognition flashed across his face. He licked his bottom lip and pulled it between his perfect teeth as his eyes moved down her body.

"Casey? Really? You guys managed to find another Acey?" Eliza said from next to him. "I can't keep you guys straight as it is. I'm just going to call you Princess."

Addison snapped out of her Zed induced stupor. "Princess?" she asked skeptically.

Zed let out a low scoff. "Boy is that fitting," he mumbled under his breath.

"Yeah, Princess...as in Snow White...white hair...it's easier to remember than another Acey name….I'm Eliza, by the way." She walked across the room and shook Addison's hand. "I'm sure you've already been told, but I play drums for Zombies."

"It's nice to meet you, Eliza, I heard a lot about you on the drive over," Addison smiled, stealing a quick glance at her brother.

"The two idiots standing by the door are Zed and Bonzo," she said motioning behind her.

Addison smiled and waved, trying her best to ignore Zed's penetrating stare.

"Why are we even wasting time with introductions?" Lacey said rolling her eyes. She turned and looked at Addison. "We may have to be on the same bus as them, but that does not mean we have to be friends with them. And I'm sure you've read the band contract?"

Zed started to laugh.

"That last part is non-negotiable!" Lacey said through gritted teeth, glaring in his direction.

"I've read it, I've signed it," Addison said calmly. Her eyes drifted over, meeting Zed's gaze. "It won't be an issue."

Lacey closed her eyes and smiled. "Good! Well...with that out the way, let's go get some practice in. We've got to get you up to speed!"

"Lacey, no amount of practice is going to make up for lack of talent," Zed said as he walked across the small room and sat down on the counter next to Tracey.

She rolled her eyes and flipped her ponytail. "Let's go!" she said as she stormed out the room. Tracey and Stacey followed quickly behind her.

"Good luck with that, Princess..." Zed whispered throwing her a wink.

Addison narrowed her eyes and unplugged her bass. "Bucky, just throw my bags onto my bunk. I'll deal with them later," she said as she walked out to join the rest of the band.

* * *

Two hours later, after going over every single song in The Acey's limited songbook several times, Lacey finally called practice to an end for the night. Addison was exhausted and in desperate need of a cigarette. As she started to dig through her bags piled up on her bunk she could hear a guitar being played from the front of the bus. A moment later a voice began to sing along.

"It's been a while...since I could...hold my head up high…. And it's been a while since I first saw you..."

Addison closed her eyes. Why did it have to be him of all people? She let herself listen to his voice. Her memories and constant dreams hardly did it justice.

"And everything I can remember...As fucked up as it all may seem. The consequences that I've rendered...I've stretched myself beyond my means..."

She sighed and shook her head, she needed to find her purse. She started to dig through her bags once more.

"Why must I feel this way?… Just make this go away…. Just one more peaceful day!..."

Addison smiled victoriously as she pulled her purse out of her last bag. She grabbed her cigarettes and phone out and took off towards the exit. As she walked out of the hallway, she froze. Her memories of him holding a guitar were nothing compared to the real thing. He looked up and locked eyes with her.

"And it's been a while...since I've seen the way the candles light your face...and it's been a while...but I can still remember just the way you taste..."

Addison shook her head and cracked a smile. "Your an octave too low. Stick to your range," she called out as she walked past him and out the door.

When the cold night air hit her face she let out a ragged breath. She took off through the parking lot and around to the front of the building, finding a bench a safe distance away from the bus. She lit her cigarette and inhaled deeply. She pulled up her phone and dialed.

"Fucking voicemail!" She waited for the beep "Bree...you're never going to believe the mess I just got myself into..."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****And welcome to the craziness that this story will be! I'm sure the first chapter comes across a bit confusing, but all will be explained in the upcoming chapters. I know this story is TOTALLY different from my previous, but please stick with me! It's going to be a wild ride! **

**SONGS USED:**

**Staind- It's Been A While**


	2. Circus

**CHAPTER 2**

**CIRCUS**

_Earlier that night..._

"Wow! From what I heard outside it sounds like you guys finally acquired some talent!" Zed said as he walked into the backroom of the tour bus. He took an appraising look at the Acey's new bassist. Long white hair, leather jacket, short black skirt barely covering a nice ass, and knee-high boots… Not a bad start.

"Play nice, Zed," Bucky warned.

"I always do," he said in a cocky tone.

"Right….Anyway, Zed, Eliza, Bonzo...this is Casey Jacobs. She'll be joining the tour as the Acey's new bassist."

Zed watched as she turned around slowly. His eyes moved from her feet, appreciating the ivory skin between her boots and the short hem of her skirt and of her bare stomach. His eyes lingered on her perky breasts before moving further up to her face.** _HOLY SHIT!_** His mind was reeling, a thousand things running through his brain at the same time. **_CASEY JACOBS MY ASS...GOD, SHE STILL HAS A GREAT ASS...HOLY SHIT SHE'S STILL USING JACOBS… _**He licked his bottom lip and pulled it between his teeth as his eyes took her in again.

"Casey? Really? You guys managed to find another Acey?" Eliza said from next to him. "I can't keep you guys straight as it is. I'm just going to call you Princess."

"Princess?" she asked skeptically.

**_THAT VOICE, GOD THE MEMORY DOESN'T EVEN COMPARE..._**He snapped out of his Addison induced stupor as Eliza's words actually sunk in. He let out a low scoff. "Boy is that fitting," he mumbled under his breath.

"Yeah, Princess...as in Snow White...white hair...it's easier to remember than another Acey name….I'm Eliza, by the way." She walked across the room and shook Addison's hand. "I'm sure you've already been told, but I play drums for Zombies."

"It's nice to meet you, Eliza, I heard a lot about you on the drive over."

**_HOW THE HELL IS SHE STAYING SO FUCKING CALM?!…. BECAUSE SHE'S ADDISON FUCKING DONNELLY, THAT'S WHY...JESUS CHRIST! PULL IT TOGETHER...  
_**  
"The two idiots standing by the door are Zed and Bonzo," she said motioning behind her.

Addison smiled and waved.

**_FUCK ME...THAT SMILE..._**

"Why are we even wasting time with introductions?"

**_FUCKING LACEY…NOTHING LIKE HER GRATING VOICE TO DISTRACT ME FROM THE FACT THAT MY FUCKING EX IS STANDING RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!_**

"We may have to be on the same bus as them, but that does not mean we have to be friends with them. And I'm sure you've read the band contract?"

He couldn't help but laugh. **_OH, IF YOU ONLY KNEW, LACEY…THAT CLAUSE WAS VIOLATED YEARS AGO, OVER, AND OVER, AND OVER AGAIN...WAIT...HOLY FUCK SHE'S GOING TO BE ON THE TOUR! WHY AM I JUST NOW REALIZING THIS?  
_**  
"That last part is non-negotiable!"

He could feel her glaring at him but he couldn't take his eyes off Addison.

"I've read it, I've signed it," Addison said calmly. Her eyes drifted over, meeting his. "It won't be an issue."

**_FUCK ME...SHE'S PISSED...SHE ALWAYS WAS HOT WHEN SHE WAS MAD...WHO AM I KIDDING...SHE WAS ALWAYS HOT….STILL IS...  
_**  
"Good! Well...with that out the way, let's go get some practice in. We've got to get you up to speed!" Lacey's voice grated against his eardrums.

"Lacey, no amount of practice is going to make up for lack of talent," Zed said as he walked across the small room and sat down on the counter next to Tracey, who just happened to be right next to where Addison was standing.

_**GOD, SHE SMELLS GOOD...THAT WAS REALLY WEIRD FOR ME TO THINK...FUCK IT...STILL TRUE.**  
_  
Lacey rolled her eyes and flipped her ponytail. "Let's go!" she said as she stormed out the room. Tracey and Stacey followed quickly behind her.

"Good luck with that, Princess..." he whispered throwing her a wink.

Addison narrowed her eyes and unplugged her bass. "Bucky, just throw my bags onto my bunk. I'll deal with them later."

He couldn't help but watch her ass as she walked out of the room.

"Necrodopolus...eyes up here!"

His head snapped up to find Bucky glaring at him.

"Don't even think about it..."

Zed smiled. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with me. I know you slept with Macey just to piss off Lacey."

"I did no such thing! Macey pursued me...Pissing Lacey off was just a nice bonus..."

"Zed..." Bucky ran his hands through his hair in frustration. "I'm only going to say this once… Keep it in your pants. The Acey's are off limits, especially Casey, understood?"

"Shouldn't be a problem."

"Better not be. Now if you'll excuse me...I apparently have luggage to deal with...God does that women have a lot of shoes."

Zed laughed to himself as Bucky walked out. _**GOOD TO SEE SOMETHINGS NEVER CHANGE**._ He ran his hands through his hair. "I need a drink..."

"You need to take what Bucky said to heart, is what you need to do, Z!" Eliza snapped at him.

"Why are you so pissy?"

"Because I don't want our chance blown because you need to get your dick wet! Just stick with the groupies for fuck's sake!"

Zed rolled his eyes. "Bonz...drink?" Bonzo nodded his head. Zed hopped off the counter and followed him out leaving Eliza behind. They walked a few blocks away to the same bar they had just been in.

When they walked in the door, the bartender waved in recognition. "Back so soon?"

"Definitely need another round...or ten...better just give us the bottle," Zed said as he and Bonzo sat down in the last booth against the far wall.

"You got it," the bartender said, pulling out two shot glasses and grabbing a bottle of Jack before bringing it over to them.

Zed lit a cigarette and took a long drag.

"So…," Bonzo said. "Are you planning on telling E? Or Bucky for that matter?"

He shook his head and slammed a shot back. "Tell them what?"

"Really, Zed? You had her picture tucked in your bunk all through basic training. You clung to that picture like a lifeline the entire time we were in Iraq. Her hair might be different, she might be a bit skinnier, and she might be going by Casey for some reason, but I'd recognize her anywhere. That's your Addie, isn't it… And don't think I didn't catch the last name thing, either."

Zed poured and took another shot. "Fuck!"

Bonzo took a shot of his own. "I'll take that as a yes..."

"Why is she here?"

"Um...to play bass? I didn't even know she played."

Zed took another shot and shook his head. "She's good too, better than your ass…"

"Thanks a lot..."

"Just stating the truth. She's a better guitarist than me, too. And why does she still have to look so damn gorgeous? Fuck!…." He poured another shot. "God, I still remember the first time I saw her...I never stood a chance…"

"Wanna talk about it? In all the years I've known you, you've never talked about her. All you've ever done is stare at her picture. Hell, it took a year before you even uttered her name… Must be a hell of a story to get this kind of reaction out of you."

Zed poured them both another shot. "Drink up, man. There's no way I'm rehashing this shit sober..."

They both took the shot.

Zed closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall. "It was the first day of my Junior year..."

* * *

"You ready for this Zed?"

"Mason...for the last time...How much different can it really be?"

Mason shrugged. "Don't say I didn't warn you..."

"Dude! You've been 'warning' me half the summer. It's school...can't be that different."

"Alright..." Mason opened the car door and stepped out. "Welcome to Seabrook High for the Creative Arts..." he said with a flourish of his hands.

"Enough with the theatrics, dude!" Zed laughed grabbing his backpack and climbing out of the car. "Thanks for the ride, Mrs. T!"

"Have a good day boys!" Mason's mom called out before she drove off.

"Come on...I'll show you around." Mason led him through the main entrance of the school and down the central hallway.

"This place is huge," Zed murmured as he looked around.

"And this is only the admin building," Mason laughed. "Luckily, as a junior and as a student of the music program, you'll only need to know your way around this building, the music building, and the quad." They stepped out of the main building and into a large courtyard. "This is the quad. We all hang out here in between classes and during lunch."

"There's a stage..."

"Well, yeah...Where else would we have impromptu performances and jam sessions?"

"Really?"

"Yeah..."

"This place is amazing!" Zed smiled.

"Dude...relax...it's still school…." Mason said rolling his eyes. "Come on. Let's go find our lockers." They walked over to the music building and begin to navigate the crowded hall. "Ah! Here's mine. Let me drop this stuff off and then we'll find yours." Mason got to work figuring out his combination.

Zed took a moment to look around. As he glanced down the hall his breath caught. "Woah...Who is that..."

Mason looked up and followed his gaze. When he saw who had captured his new friend's attention he let out a laugh. "Keep dreaming dude."

"What?"

"I'll give it to you...You've got amazing taste, but that..." he said pointing down the hall to the blonde that Zed was staring at, "is never going to happen… Besides, I don't think your girlfriend back home would appreciate you scoping out another babe."

"I wasn't trying to. How could anyone not notice her...she's gorgeous..." he whispered in awe. "Do you know her?"

"Know her? Yeah, Zed...Everyone at Seabrook High knows her."

"And I'm a little offended, by the way," Zed laughed. "Not that I'm looking to date anyone else, but why don't you think I'd have a chance?"

"Because you my friend, are here on a scholarship, and she's what we call a triple crown winner around here. There's a hierarchy."

"Triple crown? Is that like a triple threat or something? Dancing, Singing, Acting?" He asked, still not taking his eyes off of her.

"Oh, she's all those things. She's crazy talented. But let me break this down for you. Remember when I said over, and over again that this isn't like your High School in Seattle?"

"Yeah..."

"Addison Donnelly is the A number one example of that. Triple crown… She's music royalty, acting royalty, and...she's hotter than hell."

Zed looked over to him. "That's for damn sure. I didn't know girls like that were real. And what do you mean music and acting royalty?"

"Well let's see...Have you heard of Missy Donnelly?"

"The actress?"

"The three-time Oscar-winning actress. America's Sweetheart..." Mason specified. "Yeah, that's Addison's mom."

"No way!"

"Way...and her dad is Dale Donnelly."

"Doesn't ring a bell," Zed said focusing his attention back on the beautiful girl down the hall.

"You may not know the name, but you know his work. Pretty much every major song that's charted or won a Grammy in the fifteen years has been produced by him. Oh, and her grandfather was the founder of Bamm! Records."

"No fucking way!" Zed whisper yelled.

"Way..."

"Wow..."

"Yet despite the impressive pedigree, she's also one of the nicest most honest people you'll ever meet."

"How well do you know her?"

Mason let out a small laugh. "Addie is one of my nearest and dearest friends. We basically grew up together. My Dad is her Dads go to studio drummer….And actually, she's the reason I'm at this school. When she was accepted she was furious that I hadn't applied. She said there was no point studying at this school if she didn't have the best surrounding her...demanded that I get a makeup audition."

"If you know her so well, why is this the first I'm seeing her? We've literally spent almost every day together since I started working at the record store."

"Because you moved to LA during the summer, and she spends the summers abroad. I'm pretty sure this year was Paris with her mom and the Hamptons with her dad."

"Damn...that's some next level shit."

"I tried to warn you, dude. You aren't in Seattle anymore."

"Obviou….DUDE! She's walking this way!" Zed started to panic.

"Just be cool!" Mason warned.

"Hey, Mase," Addison said as her and another girl walked up to them. She gave him a quick hug, stealing a glance at Zed as she pulled away. "How was your summer?

"Good. Yours?"

"Eh...Paris was lovely but the company sucked, the Hampton's sucked, but the company was lovely. It balanced out." She looked back up to Zed. "Aren't you going to introduce me to your new friend?"

"Addie...Bree...this is Zed. He moved here over the summer and works down at the record store with me."

"Zed..." Addison said with a smile that took his breath away. "That's not a very common name...Do you have a last name, Zed?"

"Jacobs," he replied, holding out his hand.

She smiled even wider taking his hand in hers. The moment their hands touched, they both sharply inhaled at the electric current passing through them. "Addison Donnelly...it's nice to meet you, Zed Jacobs," she said softly. "I'm sure I'll be seeing you around."

"I hope so..."

Just then they heard someone call out Addison's name from across the hall. "Addison! Rebecca just signed the challenge sheet!"

"Oh, shit..." Mason laughed under his breath.

Addison rolled her eyes. "Of course she did...Does it look like I'm concerned?"

Bree laughed next to her. "Looks like your in luck new guy..."

Zed gave her a questioning look.

"I'm sure Mason can fill you in," she said with a coy smile. "Come on Adds."

Addison looked back to Zed. "Make sure you get a good seat in the quad," she threw him a wink and turned to walk away.

"Holy shit dude..." Mason whispered. "Teach me your ways!"

Zed reluctantly tore his eyes away from Addison's backside. "What?"

"I've never seen her like that. You're here for like five minutes and you already have the school HBIC eye fucking you!"

"So many questions..." Zed laughed as they started towards his locker. "What in the world is an HBIC, what is going on in the quad, why am I in luck, and what challenge?"

Mason feigned frustration. "I told you things were different..."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah...start talking."

"HBIC… Head Bitch In Charge, captain of the cheer squad, ruler of the school… That would be Addison."

"She's a cheerleader too?!"

"Dude. Keep up," Mason laughed. "She's THE cheerleader. She was the first sophomore in school history to even challenge for HBIC, much less win. Man...you should have been there for that performance… She did that Brittany song, I'm a slave 4 U… I love her like family, but man...that performance was just..." He bit his knuckles as his eyes rolled back in his head. "I'll never be able to listen to that song the same way again."

"I'm just going to pretend I followed any of that," Zed whispered as he worked the combination to his locker.

"Just wait," Mason smiled.

* * *

When morning classes concluded, Mason met Zed back at his locker. "So...how was it?"

"Not too bad," Zed said with a smile. "I can definitely get used to only having real classes in the mornings."

"I promise you, your music classes are not going to be easy if that's what your thinking," Mason said in warning.

"Oh I know, but it'll be nice to just be able to focus on those instead of going in between academic classes."

"That makes sense I guess," Mason shrugged. "On to more important things...we need to get to the quad ASAP. There is no way I'm missing a second of what's about to go down."

They quickly made their way outside to an already crowded quad. Mason stood on his toes looking around. "Dude..." he said looking up to Zed. "Can you see Bree?"

"Bree? Oh! Is that the girl who was with Addison this morning?"

"Yeah..." he said still struggling to look above the sea of heads.

Zed craned his neck ever so slightly. "Over there..." he pointed towards the front row of tables next to the stage.

"So glad you are freakishly tall..." Mason laughed as he started off through the crowd towards Bree.

When they finally made their way to the front, Bree spotted them and waved them over. "You made it just in time..." she said just as someone walked to the center of the stage.

"That's Pierce," Mason leaned over to tell Zed. "He's in the acting school. He's a Senior, student government president, captain of the football team, and...Addison's boyfriend."

Zed gave him a panicked look. "She has a boyfriend?"

"Why do you care?" Mason laughed.

Bree shook her head and smiled. "She doesn't anymore…"

"They broke up?" Mason asked in shock.

Bree just nodded her head and smiled.

"Welcome back everyone!" Pierce called out. "As I'm sure you've all heard, a challenge has been made for this years HBIC. So...without further ado...Rebecca...the stage is yours," he smiled and threw her a wink as he pulled her in for a kiss.

Bree rolled her eyes.

Pierce walked off stage and the music started. They all watched as Rebecca danced across the stage singing Mandy Moore's Candy. The crowd broke out into applause when she struck her final pose.

"Damn," Zed mumbled under his breath. "That was awesome."

Mason and Bree shared a look. "Zed...that was nothing," he said.

"Addie's got this in the bag," Bree said with a wide smile.

Right on cue, Addison took the stage. Zed's jaw dropped as he took in the sight. Never in his life had he seen someone exude so much confidence and own a crowd with a single look. She was mesmerizing.

"There's only two types of people in the world  
The ones that entertain, and the ones that observe  
Well, baby, I'm a put-on-a-show kinda girl  
Don't like the backseat, gotta be first..."

Zed couldn't take his eyes off of her.

"I'm like the ringleader  
I call the shots  
I'm like a firecracker  
I make it hot  
When I put on a show

I feel the adrenaline moving through my veins  
Spotlight on me and I'm ready to break  
I'm like a performer, the dance floor is my stage  
Better be ready, hope ya feel the same

All the eyes on me in the center of the ring  
Just like a circus  
When I crack that whip, everybody gonna trip  
Just like a circus

Don't stand there watching me, follow me  
Show me what you can do  
Everybody let go, we can make a dance floor  
Just like a circus..."

Addison jumped off the stage and began to dance through the crowd stopping in front of him. The crowd around them disappeared, the only thing he could see was her.

"There's only two types of guys out there  
Ones that can hang with me, and ones that are scared  
So, baby, I hope that you came prepared  
I run a tight ship, so beware..."

She ran her hand down his cheek and winked before she spun around and stood on the table next to them.

"I'm like a ring leader  
I call the shots  
I'm like a firecracker  
I make it hot  
When I put on a show..."

She walked across the tops of the tables making her way back to the stage.

"I feel the adrenaline moving through my veins  
Spotlight on me and I'm ready to break  
I'm like a performer, the dance floor is my stage  
Better be ready, hope that you feel the same

All the eyes on me in the center of the ring  
Just like a circus  
When I crack that whip  
Everybody gonna trip  
Just like a circus

Don't stand there watching me, follow me  
Show me what you can do  
Everybody let go  
We can make a dance floor  
Just like a circus..."

She turned her back to the crowd and dropped the mic before falling backward, allowing them to catch her.

The entire quad burst into applause as they started chanting her name.

"Woah…." Zed whispered still unable to take his eyes off of her.

Mason and Bree laughed as they took in his expression.

"I told you..."

Pierce took the stage again. "Ladies and Gentlemen, for the second year in a row the Mighty Shrimp HBIC is Addison Donnelly!"

The students in the crowd cheered loudly again.

"That was just… I've never seen..." Zed couldn't find the words.

Mason and Bree laughed again.

A few minutes later, the crowd had finally thinned and they sat down at their table to eat their lunch.

"Adds!" Bree squealed as she saw her make her way through the tables to join

them. "That was fantastic! Congrats girl!"

Addison hugged her best friend. "Thanks! I told you I wasn't worried!" She smiled over to Zed. Before either of them could say anything to the other, Mason wrapped her up in a tight bear hug.

"That was awesome!"

Addison's laughed and hugged him back, just as her phone began to ring. "Mase...I got to get that," she giggled trying to pry him off. When he finally let her go she pulled her phone out and rolled her eyes. "It's the wicked witch of the west," she announced before answering it. "Hello, Mother…Yes….No, I drove this morning...Only one person challenged….of course not, it was easy." She rolled her eyes again. "No, I have not signed up for the play, I told you, It's the same day as the Music Review. No, ma'am...yes, ma'am..." she sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I'll sign up this afternoon." She sat down on top of the table and closed her eyes as she continued to let her mom talk. She suddenly perked up and smiled. "You are? For how long?...I mean, congratulations!...Mmhmmm….wow… sounds amazing… yeah… Love you too, Mom. Bye." Addison hung up the phone and smiled. "Mom's flying out right now to film in Greece. She'll be on location for at least six weeks..." she looked up to her friends. "Who's up for a party?"

Mason's face lit up. "Would you happen to need a band to play at this party?"

Addison laughed. "That depends, Mase...are you planning on singing? You know I think you're a great drummer, but vocally..."

Mason rolled his eyes. "Ha. Ha. No…I am not. But, my man, Zed, here, is. A few of us from work have been jamming together for the last month. What do you say?"

Addison looked over to Zed. "So you're a singer?"

"Sure am," he replied confidently. "I play guitar too."

"Really? Do you have your schedule on you?"

Zed dug in his back pocket and handed her the folded up piece of paper. She opened it up and read through it before handing it back to him.

"Looks like we'll be spending quite a bit of time together this semester." She turned back to Mason, "Your band can play."

"YES!" Mason jumped up and hugged her again.

"I'll get the word out for the party. Are we doing low key or…." Bree asked with a large smile.

Addison shook her head and laughed. "When do I ever do anything low-key?"

"School-wide blast it is!" Bree exclaimed just as the bell rang.

Addison smiled and stood up. "Come on, Zed Jacobs. We have a class to get to."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**:** I just want to thank everyone who reviewed and sent me PMs after I posted chapter 1. You guys are the best and I am eternally grateful for all the support! The next few chapters are going to be mostly flashbacks, but it'll hopefully provide some context for the rest of the story. I hope you enjoyed today's update. Drop me a review and let me know!**


	3. Punk Rock Princess

**CHAPTER 3**

**PUNK ROCK PRINCESS**

When Addison stepped off the bus, the cold night air hit her face and she let out a ragged breath. She took off through the parking lot and around to the front of the building, finding a bench a safe distance away. She lit her cigarette and inhaled deeply. She pulled out her phone and dialed.

"Fucking voicemail!" She waited for the beep "Bree...you're never going to believe the mess I just got myself into… Call me back." she hung up the phone and laid down on the bench, staring up at the stars. She took another drag from her cigarette and blinked back a tear as memories started to flood her mind.

* * *

"Pink or blue?" Addison asked as she stood in front of her closet and held up two dresses.

"Hmm...depends on what your goal is tonight," Bree said as she finished rolling a joint. "Are you trying to impress someone or make someone jealous?" She lit it and took a deep drag before handing it to Addison.

Addison rolled her eyes as she took it. "Who would I be trying to make jealous?"

"So you are trying to impress someone..."

"Not the point...answer my question!" she laughed, handing it back to Bree.

"Pierce, maybe?"

Addison groaned in frustration. "I told you, I don't care."

"Addie, he cheated on you! With Rebecca of all people...ew….How can you not care?"

She sat down on the bed next to Bree and patted her head. "I'm fine. I promise. Pierce was fun for a while, but it's not like we were in 'love'," she said using air quotes. "We're in high school. I was gone for the entire summer. The cheating thing… it's a non-issue. Obviously, he decided getting laid was more important to him than being with me."

Bree shook her head. "I'll never understand how you can be so blase' about relationships."

"Really? My mom has been married how many times? And my dad?"

"So… Don't you think that one day you'll meet a man and he'll sweep you off your feet and you'll be madly in love, and….don't laugh at me!"

Addison continued to laugh as she wiped a tear away from her eye. "I'm sorry...but that was funny."

Bree smacked her with a pillow. "You know that feeling when you meet someone and your heart skips a beat?

"Yeah, that's called arrhythmia...you can die from that."

"If you don't believe in any of it then why are you asking me what dress will impress the new guy?"

"New guy has a name, you know..." she said taking the joint back from Bree.

"Mmhmm… avoiding much?"

Addison exhaled and stood back up, walking over to her closet. "Just because I think he's fuck-hot doesn't mean I'm changing my mind on the L word….now which one?" she asked holding the two dresses up again.

"Either, they both look good on you."

"Bree...everything looks good on me. Pick."

"Blue, the color makes your eyes pop, and the skirt hugs your ass."

"And that's why you're my best friend!" she smiled as she hung the pink one back up.

"So what's new-guys story anyway? And stop hogging!" Bree said standing back up and taking the j back from her.

"Bree, it's Zed…and I don't know yet. I got to talk to him a little in between classes today, just the basics really. He won a scholarship to attend Seabrook, he works at the record store with Mason...other than that...I heard him sing a little in warmups today, he's got a great voice."

"I thought you didn't go for guys in the music program? Something about not wanting to go easy on the competition?"

Addison laughed. "Again, just because I think he's hot..." She pulled the tight blue dress over her head.

"Mmhmm...I saw you two in the hallway. What was that all about?"

"Don't know what you're talking about, Bree."

"Right…I know instant chemistry when I see it."

Addison rolled her eyes. "But seriously, other than that drool-worthy jawline, eyes that draw you in from across a crowded room, and head of amazing hair...he seems like a nice guy."

"And he's hot…"

Addison smiled and shook her head. "Yeah, and he's hot," she giggled, popping a piece of juicy fruit gum into her mouth.

* * *

"You have got to be kidding me..." Zed said as they pulled onto a private street and into a long gated driveway. "This is where we're playing? This is her house?"

"Yup...You get used to it," Mason said with a shrug as he punched in the access code. "It's pretty isolated so no one really ever complains when we have parties."

"This place is huge!"

"Eh...I prefer her Dad's house. So does Adds. It's on the beach in Malibu and has a recording studio, it's awesome."

"Dude...Next. Level. Shit."

Mason laughed. "Welcome to Beverly Hills, man." He parked the car next to a bright pink Ferrari.

As they got out of the car, Zed let out a low whistle. "Who would do such a thing to a Ferrari? Pink? Really?"

"What's wrong with pink?"

Zed turned to see Addison standing by the front door. She was all long legs, short blue dress, and blonde hair flowing. He quickly pulled himself together and tried to act as smooth as possible. "Nothing's wrong with pink, I just don't think it should be on a Ferrari."

"Good thing it's my car and not yours then," she said with a smile.

"Your car?"

"Mmhmm, sweet sixteen present."

"You got a custom painted Ferrari F12 Berlinetta for your birthday?"

Addison threw her head back and laughed. "You play guitar, sing, and know high-end Italian sports cars...be still my heart. Wanna take it for a spin?"

"Really?"

"Um...Hello...we need to unload equipment, set it up, do a sound check..." Mason said pointing to his own car.

Addison shrugged and looked over to Zed, "Maybe later then." She walked over to Mason's car and started to help unload.

"You don't have to do that," Zed said, taking an amp from her hands.

"Are you kidding me?" Mason called out. "Yes, she does! We've got a ton of shit to unload and Owen's late!"

She smiled and took the amp back from Zed. "Really, I don't mind. And don't worry, I know what I'm doing."

"I didn't mean it like that...I just..." he started to stumble.

"Zed...I'm just fucking with you! I appreciate you being a gentleman. Now come on, I'll show you where you guys will be playing. Bree's already back there."

* * *

Zed had never seen so many people at a party in his life. There were people everywhere.

"You ready for this man?" Mason asked as he clapped him on the back. "Your first official LA gig."

Zed shook his head and smiled. "This is going to be awesome." He looked over to their bassist Owen and threw him a nod. "Let's do this!"

Addison walked onto the makeshift stage set up by the swimming pool. She smiled at Zed, "Mind if I borrow that mic for a minute? The least I can do is introduce you guys."

"Be my guest..."

She stepped in front of him and grabbed the microphone. "How's everyone doing tonight?!" The crowd of guests cheered and hollered. "Without further delay, give a big round of applause for the Galaxy Boyz!" As the crowd applauded again, she held her hand over the microphone and looked at the three of them. "Really, though? That's what you're going with?" She smiled and shook her head. "We'll work on it. Have a good show boys!" She handed the microphone back to Zed and jumped off the stage to join Bree.

Zed took a deep breath. "Thank you, Addison, for letting us play tonight. You guys ready?" The crowd cheered as Mason counted off.

"1...2...3…."

As the opening chords sounded, Addison's eyes focused on Zed. She couldn't tear them away from the way his muscles moved as he played. That is until he started to sing.

"Maybe when the room is empty  
Maybe when the bottle's full..."

"Holy hell," she whispered under her breath as Bree bit back a laugh.

"Maybe when the door gets broke down love can break in  
Maybe when I'm done with thinking  
Maybe you can think me whole  
Maybe when I'm done with endings this can begin  
This can begin  
This can begin..." He jumped up landed as he hit the chord progression for the chorus.

"If you could be my Punk Rock Princess  
I would be your Garage Band King  
You could tell me how you just don't fit in  
And how you're gonna be something..."

Addison was mesmerized.

"Um, Addie...You've got a little drool, just there," Bree teased poking at her mouth. Addison swatted her hand away and continued to watch Zed as he tore through the bridge."

"I never thought you'd last  
I never dreamed you would  
You watched your life go past  
You wonder if you should

If you could be my Punk Rock Princess  
I would be your Garage Band King  
You could tell me why you just don't fit in  
And how you're gonna be something  
If I could be your first real heartache  
I would do it all over again  
If you could be my Punk Rock Princess  
I would be your Heroin

Whoa Ohhhh, you know, you only burn my bridges  
Whoa Ohhh, you know, you just can't let it sink in  
You could be my Heroin  
You could be my Heroin."

Addison was the first to break into applause, hollering and cheering along with everyone else.

"You okay there, Adds?" Bree asked as the band started their next song.

"My heart is racing and my palms are sweaty...I think I'm coming down with the flu..." she said turning to her in a sudden panic.

"You don't have the flu, girl," Bree laughed. "Now just turn back around and keep drooling."

Addison wiped at her mouth. "I am not..."

"Mmhmmm…."

When their set was over Addison and Bree met them at the stage and handed them drinks.

"Guys! That was amazing!" Addison said, hugging Mason.

"Really? You liked it?"

"Mase! Of course, I did! You guys can play at every party I have! So clear your calendar for the next few weeks!"

"YES!" Mason exclaimed spinning her around. When he set her back down he grew serious. "Now for the fun part...What needs work?"

"No bullshit?"

Mason nodded his head. "Always."

"Your 4/4 syncopation in the bridge was a tad slow,

but if you come back in on the high-hat at the end of the second chorus it'll help you pick up speed."

"Fuck...That was the sexiest thing I've ever heard in my life..." Zed whispered in awe next to him.

Addison looked over at him and laughed. "What?"

"I'm sorry..." he shook his head to clear it. "That was... amazing. How did you..."

Mason smiled. "She's got a hell of an ear. Any critiques for Zed, here?" he asked her.

Addison looked down at her hands for a second. When she looked back up she locked eyes with Zed and smiled. "You want it nice or honest?"

"I'm with Mason on this one. Always 'No Bullshit'."

She smiled again. "You're a fantastic guitar player. And your voice is really good...But...your intentionally trying to mimic the ever so slightly nasally singing style of the pop-punk bands that are popular in the Seattle area right now. I'm guessing that's where you're from?"

Zed's jaw dropped open and he nodded his head ever so slightly.

"Find your own voice...You've got some serious potential...oh, and your F minor chord slipped towards the end of the final verse."

Zed dropped down to his knee. "Will you marry me?"

Addison threw her head back and laughed. "That is a first. I'm flattered! But, I'm going to have to decline. I don't believe in the institution….I will, however, let you go get me another drink instead."

He stood up and smiled. "I'd love to. What are you drinking?"

"Tequila and Perrier," she said with a smile.

"Really? That's unexpected."

Addison shrugged. "I hate the taste of beer, and vodka smells like rubbing alcohol and bad decisions."

"It does, doesn't it," Zed laughed. "Want to take a walk with me? You can show me where to refill these?" he asked, motioning towards their empty cups.

"I'd love to," she said softly taking his outstretched hand.

"We're not going to be seeing them the rest of the night, are we Mase?" Bree asked loud enough for them to overhear.

"Probably not..."

Addison turned and rolled her eyes flipping them both off. "We'll be right back."

As they walked through the heavy crowd towards the other end of the yard where the bar was, Zed took a deep breath and tried to strike up a conversation.

"So...How often do you throw parties here? You know...since I'll now be playing at them."

She smiled and looked over to him. "It depends. When my mom is on location I throw them every other weekend, since I'm at my Dad's house the other weeks. But when she's here, I don't throw them at all. She's in Greece for about six weeks, so I'll probably throw at least two more before then."

"And she's cool with it?"

Addison let out a laugh. "Hardly. She'd probably ship me off to boarding school in Switzerland if she ever found out. She's been trying to do it for years anyway."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Everyone thinks my mom is this amazing, sweet, bubbly, person...But..." Addison said as she walked behind the bar and grabbed Zed's cup from him. "Nobody else ever sees what she's really like."

"Not exactly America's Sweetheart at home?"

"No..." She re-filled his beer for him and got to work on mixing her own drink.

"I thought I was supposed to be getting you a refill," Zed smiled at her from across the bar.

"I'm used to doing things on my own. But, I am enjoying the company."

"Really?"

She smiled and nodded. "So, Zed. I think since you seem to be pretty close with one of my two best friends, we should maybe get to know each other a little better. What do you say?"

"I'd like that. I don't really know too many people around here other than Mason and Owen."

"I only know Owen from hanging around the record store and annoying Mase while he's trying to work," she giggled leading him to the edge of the pool. She slipped her shoes off and dipped her feet into the water. "But, he seems cool enough."

"Yeah, he's a great guy. Great bass player too."

"He's alright," she smiled before taking a sip of her drink.

"I need a cigarette, do you mind?" Zed asked.

"Not at all."

He felt around in his back pocket and let out a frustrated sigh. "I must have left them in Mason's car."

Addison smiled sympathetically "Sorry. I'd offer you one, but I don't smoke...well, I don't smoke cigarettes anyway," she corrected.

"Really?" Zed asked with a large knowing smile across his face.

Addison looked around and smiled, biting her lip. "You?"

"I'll never turn it down."

Addison smiled even wider as she stood and picked up her shoes. "No one's usually allowed inside during parties, but..." she grabbed his hand, "I do have an image to preserve." She led him into the house and up the stairs to a large pastel pink bedroom and through to a balcony overlooking the hills.

"Wow, this view is incredible."

"Thank you." She sat down next to him and pulled a joint out of her bra.

Zed shook his head and chuckled. "And you just happened to have that on your persons all night?"

"My persons?" she lit it and laughed. "Yeah, Bree rolled me an extra one before you guys pulled up," she said passing it over to him.

Zed took and took a deep drag, holding it in for a moment. When he exhaled he looked over to her. "So...What instruments do you play?"

"Hmm….let's see…. Piano, guitar, bass, ukelele, drums, violin, cello, flute, clarinet,...I tried the saxophone, but lost interest...um...what else..."

"Woah...that's a lot."

Addison shrugged her shoulders. "I'm pretty sure my dad had me at the piano before I was sitting upright. I fell in love with music at an early age… What about you? What other instruments do you play?"

"Besides guitar, just piano. Any siblings?"

Addison let out a soft laugh as she passed it back to him. "Biologically, I'm an only child. But I did have a step-brother for a few years?"

"You're going to have to explain that one."

"A few years back My Dad was married to this woman he met in New York. She has a son from a previous marriage. Instant sibling," she laughed. "He still hangs around when he's on break from school, which I totally get. His family in New York is horrible," she leaned over and whispered, "they're all in the mafia...Poor Bartholomew would never cut it in that world."

"That's kind of crazy. You kind of sort of have mob ties..."

Addison threw her head back and laughed. "Not really. But we did have to beef up security for a while. So… do you have any?"

"Mob ties? Not that I know of..."

She smacked his shoulder as she exhaled. "Ass...Do you have any siblings?"

"Ohhh, yeah...I have a little sister, Zoey. She lives in Seattle with my Dad."

"When did your parents divorce?"

"Oh, they're still married."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to assume."

"It's fine, Addison. Me getting into Seabrook has been quite the tension point between them. My Dad wasn't going to jeopardize his career so I could chase a dream, and my mom wasn't going to let me pass up the opportunity. So, my mom rented a little apartment in Santa Monica and we moved down here. She travels back up to Seattle as much as possible."

"Wow...That's amazing."

"She's pretty awesome…my dad...not so much. He thinks studying music is a waste of time and I should be studying to get into Stanford instead of Julliard."

"Julliard?"

"Yup. That's why I applied for the scholarship to Seabrook, they have more students accepted than any other school on the West Coast."

"Well, you're definitely in the right place," Addison said with a soft smile. "And trust me, I get the parental disapproval thing."

"Really?"

"My mom doesn't think I should be limiting myself to the music school at Seabrook. She was furious that I didn't audition for the acting program. So...now I'm dual enrolled."

"How is that even possible?"

"It's not easy, but I take most of my academic classes privately over the summers so I can fit in all the required classes in both departments. Plus she has me studying dance before school, and on Saturday mornings I'm with her, working with an acting coach after school after I get out of cheer. Not to mention that she put me on a strict work out regiment when I made the squad."

"That's insane."

"Yup…Why do you think I smoke?"

"So which do you like more? Music or Acting?"

"Seriously? I know we've known each other for less than 24 hours, but what do you think?"

"Hmmm…."

Addison smiled and smacked him again. "I can't breathe without music."

"I know how you feel. If I couldn't play..." he said wistfully.

"Favorite band?" She asked looking up at him with a smile.

"Classic or current?"

"Classic."

"Oh that's a tough one," he whispered. "It's a tie between the Beatles and Zepplin."

"Oooh, that is a tough call. Favorite Beatles song?"

"Hmm...I'd have to say Blackbird."

"That's my dad's favorite, too," she smiled.

"What about you?"

"Something."

Zed shook his head. "Unexpected choice. George Harrison, fan?"

"He was vastly underutilized. Poor guy only got one song on each album. And they were all amazing! I mean, hello! While My Guitar Gently Weeps? Brilliant!"

"I'll give you that one," he said with a soft laugh. "So, What about you? Favorite band?"

"To listen to or play?"

"Good question...play?"

Addison grew serious. "Don't laugh."

"I would never."

"The Runaways."

Zed's head snapped towards her. "For real?"

"Yeah...I don't know why, but my favorite song to play is Cherry Bomb. And don't even get me started on singing it. I just...it's my favorite."

"Damn..." he shook his head and smiled. "That's pretty badass. I would have never guessed... Can you really play it?"

"Zed, I don't know your middle name, Jacobs...are you questioning my skills?"

He shook his head and laughed, holding his hands up in mock surrender. "It's Milo. And no… I've heard you could play, and I know you can sing..."

Addison smiled and rolled her eyes, "Come on," she stood up and walked back into her room and into an adjoining room. She flicked on the light. "Pick an instrument."

Zed looked around the pastel blue room. Two

walls were lined with various guitars, while the other two had a large mirror and a ballet bar. The center of the room was occupied by a white baby grand piano. "Holy… are these all yours?" he asked in a whisper admiring the guitars.

"Yup. Most of my stuff is at my Dad's house. But, I try to have a selection here as well."

He walked further in, his hand running appreciatively over one of the guitars. "No way... Is this a blueberry fade Les Paul?"

"You know your guitars," she smiled. She picked up the guitar and walked over to the amp in the corner, plugging it in.

Nothing could have prepared him for the vision that she was when she played.

"Can't stay at home, can't stay at school  
Old folks say, "You poor little fool"  
Down the streets, I'm the girl next door  
I'm the fox you've been waiting for  
Hello, daddy. Hello, mom  
I'm your ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb  
Hello world, I'm your wild girl  
I'm your ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb"

If Zed's jaw could have dropped any further, it would have hit the floor when she perfectly executed Joan Jett's guitar solo.

When she finished she looked up and blew her blonde hair out of her face and flicked her pick across the room.

"That was..." he was at a loss for words. All he could do was clap.

Addison laughed. "Let me guess, you had me pegged for the Pop-Princess type?"

"No, I didn't mean…"

She gave him a look.

"Okay, maybe a little, but to be fair, I had only ever seen you perform to Britney Spears...which, by the way..." he sighed nervously. "That was amazing."

"Well, then you fell for the act," she smiled walking closer to him and running a hand down his face. "And thank you….My mom has my image very carefully curated. The daughter of America's Sweetheart could never be seen wearing black and playing rock, oh no...It's all pastels and pop for me."

"But the house parties and the pot are okay?" He asked with an arched brow.

Addison shrugged her shoulders and smiled as she put the guitar back on its stand. "We all rebel where we can."

Zed smiled at her, resisting the urge to close the distance between them and kiss her. "Favorite book?" he asked walking closer to her.

"The Great Gatsby."

"No way! That's my favorite, too!" he said in disbelief.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I had to read it in eighth grade, and I swear I've read it a hundred times since."

"Same," she giggled. "Favorite movie?"

"Night of the Living Dead."

"Fan of the classics, I see," she smiled. "I prefer my zombies a little quicker moving, though."

"You've seen Night of the Living Dead?"

Addison just smiled again and grabbed his hand leading him back down the stairs and to the other end of the house. When she flipped on another set of lights, they were standing in a large home theater room. She walked to the back wall and opened a closet full of DVD's

"Tada!"

Zed walked over and looked at them. "Woah...these are all..."

"Horror movies, yeah... I'm a bit obsessed."

He looked up and smiled. "Favorite horror movie?"

Her fingers moved over the shelves until she stopped and pulled one out. "The Omen II...Don't know why, but I love it."

"You are full of surprises."

"So are you..." she whispered. Their faces were so close their noses brushed against each other. "We should probably..."

"Party...other people..."

Addison blinked quickly and shook her head to clear it as she took a step back. "Let's go find everyone else."

"Yeah...they're probably wondering where we are," he said quietly, secretly thankful that she was holding his hand again.

When they walked of the room, they ran into Pierce. Literally.

"Pierce! What are you doing in here?" Addison asked looking around to see if anyone else had decided to move the party into the house.

"The pool house bathroom was occupied." His words were slightly slurred.

Addison rolled her eyes. "So...you just can't come in the house. You know the rules. Party stays in the back."

"Oh, so it's okay for your new boyfriend to be in the house?" he asked pointing to Zed

"I'm not..."

Addison held a hand up to stop him. "Don't" she whispered to Zed before turning back to Pierce. "This is Zed, he just moved here. I was showing him around."

"I'm sure you were showing him something. How long did it take for you to sleep with him? Huh?"

"What the hell are you talking about, Pierce? Even if I did, what concern is it of yours? We broke up."

Pierce grabbed her arm. "Oh, so you'll give it up for him?"

"Oww, let go..."

"Hey, man. She asked you to let her go," Zed said trying to step in between them.

Pierce let go of Addison's arm and swung, landing a punch on Zed's cheek, sending him stumbling backward. Before Zed could get his bearings and swing back, Addison had wound back and punched Pierce so hard that he hit the ground.

"Damn, woman..." Zed said in awe, walking up behind her. "That was a hell of a punch."

"I've had lots of practice with my step-brother," she shrugged. She turned to look at him, "You okay?"

"I've had worse."

"I'm sorry about him. He's a lousy drunk."

"Should you check on him?"

"Nah… He can sleep it off. I'll have one of his teammates drag him out in a few." She ran her thumb softly over his cheek. "That's already starting to swell. We should get you some ice." She took his hand in hers once more and stepped over Pierce as they made their way to the kitchen. "You, sit," she commanded, pointing to a barstool next to the counter. She quickly got to work getting him a pack of frozen peas and a towel. He winced when she placed them against his cheek.

"Sorry," she whispered.

"I'm fine. Just cold." He took her free hand and examined it. "You should probably ice your knuckles as well." He slowly brought them up to his lips and placed a soft kiss on each of her reddened knuckles.

Addison smiled sweetly, taking a step closer to him. "Thank you, they feel much better now," she whispered almost breathlessly. She moved the bag of frozen peas and gently kissed his cheek.

"Your lips are better than morphine," he whispered as he looked into her eyes and ran his thumb down the side of her face.

She smiled and bit her lip, stepping even closer to him so that she was between his legs. Slowly she leaned in and brushed a kiss against his lips.

She let out a soft moan as his hand ran through her hair and he kissed her back.

She dropped the bag of frozen peas and straddled his lap. Her hands ran through his thick hair as they continued to kiss.

Without warning, he pulled back and rested his forehead against hers. "Addison...I'm sorry... I can't. I have a girlfriend."

"Oh..." she said quickly hopping off his lap. "I'm so sorry. If I had known...I wouldn't have..."

"No...you're… you're amazing. I want to… I just… Fuck...I'm sorry, I should have said something sooner. Its just...you're just..."

"Zed, relax. It's fine," she smiled and ran a hand through his hair once more. "She's a lucky girl."

"You're not pissed?"

"Why would I be? Friends?" she asked holding out her hand.

"Friends..." he whispered, taking her hand and shaking it. "You're too perfect."

Addison let out a soft laugh. "Hardly...Come on, let's go get back to the party."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I promise the entire story isn't going to be flashbacks! We'll get back to present day soon enough! Hope everyone enjoyed another glimpse into the past! Drop me a review and let me know!**

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

_**PUNK ROCK PRINCESS:**_** Something Corporate **

_**CHERRY**_** BOMB:**** The Runaways**


	4. Hands Down

**Chapter 4**

**HANDS DOWN**

"Bullshit!" Bonzo called out, yanking Zed back into the present.

"What?"

"I'm calling bullshit on the entire thing. There's no way the girl that I just met on our bus is the daughter of an Oscar-winning actress and a music mogul!"

"It's the truth."

"Why the hell is she on this tour then?"

"Didn't I already ask that question? I'm pretty sure you answered 'to play bass'."

Bonzo shook his head. "And another thing…you mean to tell me, that you, of all people, stopped because of a girlfriend? One that was hundreds of miles away?"

Zed ran his hand through his hair and laughed. "Believe it or not, I wasn't always a complete asshole...but don't let anyone else know that."

"This is un-fucking-believable."

"Try living it."

Bonzo poured another shot. "Alright, I'm all in. Continue..."

"Where was I?"

"First day of school, house party in Beverly Hills…."

Zed lit another cigarette. "Oh yeah… That first month of school was torture. We had every single afternoon class together, and don't even get me started on the days when she'd wear her cheer uniform..." He took a deep drag. "We always ended up talking for hours every time we were together outside of school and we talked on the phone almost every night. I even started skipping my trips back home."

"When did you two finally get together, then?" Bonzo asked, stealing Zed's cigarette and taking a drag.

Zed poured another shot and smiled. "We may have kissed again the night of her birthday, but the Lakers season opener was when things really started…"

* * *

Zed looked up from the latest issue of Guitar Magazine when he heard the bell sound as the front door of the record store was open. The second he saw her face, he broke into a large smile.

"Adds!" Mason hollered, jumping down from the step ladder he was using to change out a display. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at play rehearsals?"

Addison shrugged, "I got bored and skipped out early, shhh...don't tell anyone." She searched around the room, when she locked eyes with Zed her face broke out in a large smile. "What are you two doing after work?"

Zed walked from behind the counter to meet them. "Nothing."

"Well we've all got plans now," she announced as she pulled out four tickets from behind her back.

"Are those…."

"YES!" Mason exclaimed hugging her. "LAKERS TICKETS!"

Addison giggled and swatted him with the tickets until he set her back down. "Daddy can't make it back from New York until Monday night, so I have the seats all to myself…" she handed them each a ticket. "Bree's coming too. It's the season opener so it should be fun."

"Holy shit," Zed whispered as he examined the ticket closer. "These are floor seats. Addison...I can't accept this."

"Oh, please. Yes, you can. If you don't then the seats are literally going to sit there empty. Besides, they're only second row. You have to peer around Jack's head to even see anything. Although, you'll probably be able to see over him...lucky."

"Wait...Jack? As in Jack Nicholson?!"

"Yeah...and he leans back in his chair, All. The. Time," she said shaking her head in frustration. "Anyway...tip-off is at seven. I'm driving. Meet me at my Dad's when you guys get off."

"Um...Adds, we're not all going to fit in your car."

"No, but Daddy said I could drive the Maybach as long as I, and I quote, 'don't let Mason anywhere near the front seat.'"

"You drive into the gate one time..." he laughed shaking his head. "Don't worry, you can tell Daddy Dale that I will be quite happy in the backseat."

"He also said to smack you if you called him 'Daddy Dale'," she giggled, reaching out to hit him.

"He loves me, he's just in denial."

Addison rolled her eyes. "I'll see you guys later." She gave them both a hug and waved before she walked out the door.

A few hours later Mason and Zed pulled up to the gate of Addison's father's house on the beach in Malibu. Mason hit the call button.

"Let me guess, you forgot the code again?" Addison's voice said over the speaker.

"No, I just like making you buzz me in," Mason laughed.

"You're such an ass," she giggled as the gate began to open.

Addison was standing by the front door when they pulled up. Zed couldn't help but check her out. She was wearing a pair of short, tight, denim shorts and a purple Lakers t-shirt knotted above her waist. Her long blonde hair was down and blowing in the light breeze.

"Zed...Zed...Z!"

"Yeah?" He asked turning to face Mason.

"Are you going to sit there checking her out or are we getting out the car?"

"I wasn't…."

Mason rolled his eyes. "Yeah...keep telling yourself that," he said as he opened the car door and walked over to Addison, scooping her up in a bear hug.

Zed opened his door and walked over to them just as Mason set her down.

"Hi..." she said sweetly hugging him and kissing his cheek. "Come on in...Bree's still not here." She turned around and opened the door, walking into the house.

As they walked into the foyer, Mason's phone rang. "Oh...right..." he whispered looking at the screen. "Um...it's my mom, I'll be right in..." he said to them before stepping back outside.

"What is he up to?" Addison asked more to herself than to Zed.

"What?"

"Oh...sorry...that's not his mom's ringtone… who's he sneaking off to talk to?" She suddenly gasped. "Does he have a girlfriend he's hiding from me?!"

Zed let out a soft laugh. "Not that I know of."

Addison scrunched up her nose and frowned. "Damn...I was really looking forward to giving him a hard time for once." She shrugged. "Oh, well….I was just watching tv...wanna watch with me while Mason is talking to his 'mom'," she asked with a smile.

"Sure, whatcha watching?"

"Spongebob..." she giggled walking into the main room and sitting down on the large leather couch.

Zed smiled and sat down beside her. "I'm warning you, I have a bad habit of quoting entire episodes."

Addison looked over to him and laughed. "Don't worry, I'm the same way."

As they sat on the couch next to one another, his eyes kept drifting away from the television and over to her. He couldn't help but watch her as she twirled her long hair in her fingers. His attention snapped back towards the show when Mason walked in.

"Hey, guys...HEY! You're watching Spongebob without me?"

Addison shrugged, "You were on the phone with your 'mom'," she said using air quotes. "What was I supposed to do? Not finish watching? It's the Sea Bears episode!"

"I love that one…." he shook his head to focus, remembering what he was going to say. "I forgot my wallet at the house. I'm going to go run back home and grab it."

Addison looked over at the clock. "You better haul ass, traffic is going to be rough."

"I know, I know...I'll call you when I'm on my way back," he said before quickly turning around and rushing out the house.

"Lies, lies, lies..." Addison whispered, sharing a look with Zed. "Oh this is the best part!" she called out jumping to her feet. "C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E-S-O-N-G Song!"

Zed laughed and started to sing along. "And if you don't think that we can sing it faster than you're wrong, but it'll help if you just sing aloooong!"

"Bum, bum, bum," she sang before gasping. "What are you wearing?!"

"What?" Zed looked down, checking out his outfit.

"A Sonics shirt? Really?"

"I'm from Seattle," he shrugged.

Addison turned off Spongebob. "You can not wear that!" she giggled. "Come on, I'm pretty sure Bartholomew has a Lakers shirt that will fit you. He's a Knicks fan, but even he knows to wear Lakers gear to a Lakers game," she said leading him upstairs to the third floor. She walked into one of the rooms on the right side of the hall. "This would be my step-brother's room."

"He won't mind if I borrow his shirt?"

"Not at all. As I said, he's a Knicks fan anyway." She opened the closet and flipped through the hangers. "Jersey or t-shirt?"

"T-shirt," Zed said walking up behind her.

"T-shirt it is" she smiled, pulling it out of the closet. Zed pulled his Sonics shirt over his head.

Addison bit her lip as she watched his muscles flex, resisting every urge to run her hands along his well-defined abs and chest.

"See something you like, Gorgeous?" he teased throwing her a wink.

"In your dreams, Jacobs," she smirked tossing the yellow shirt at him.

"Every night...over and over again..."

"Zed!" she smacked him and rolled her eyes. "You, sir, are trouble...I don't think your girlfriend would appreciate that."

"I'm just fucking with you, Adds...sorry, it's just too easy."

She smiled and rolled her eyes again. "I'm going to go call Bree and see where the hell she is. Can you call Mase and figure out how long he's going to be?"

"Sure thing."

"My room is just across the hall. Meet me in there when you're done," she said walking out the room.

A couple minutes later Zed walked across the hall and into her room. It couldn't have been more different from her pastel pink room at her mother's house. The walls were dark gray and a large dark cherry California King bed covered in plush white linens and pillows filled the center of the room. It definitely felt more like her. He spotted Addison standing on the balcony with her back towards him.

"Well...Bree's out. Her brother came in town and she's meeting his fiance," she turned around to look at him.

She took his breath away. The way the setting sun surrounded her and the light ocean air blew her hair...Zed couldn't look away.

"Zed...Zed..."

"Huh?"

Addison walked closer to him. "I asked if you had any luck with Mason?"

"Oh, um...yeah, he said he's going to have to help his mom with something...won't be able to make it..." he mumbled, not able to focus on anything other than her.

She rolled her eyes. "Of course they both bail. They beg and beg to go and then this..." she turned around and closed the balcony doors before facing Zed again. "If

you want to skip the game too, it's fine."

"What? Of course not...I mean, if you don't mind going with just me?"

"Will your girlfriend mind? I don't want to cause any problems between you two if she sees us on tv."

"It's fine, Addie. I'm allowed to have friends."

"Okay..." she said with a smile. "You can hang your shirt up in my closet if you want."

"Thanks." He turned around and walked towards what he assumed was her closet. When he flipped on the light, he turned back to look at her in confusion. "Um...where?"

"Oh, sorry. Not that one. The other closet. That one's just for my shoes."

Zed walked further into the shoe closet and looked around. "How many pairs of shoes do you own, woman?"

She walked up behind him and stood on her tip-toes to rest her chin on his shoulder. "Don't know. Shoes are my weakness. They're the only thing I'll willingly blow money on."

"Do you actually wear all these?"

"Sadly, no...But they are pretty to look at," she sighed, petting a pair of knee-high boots adoringly.

Zed shook his head and glanced in her direction. It took all of his willpower to not close the minuscule gap between their faces and kiss her. She was just too damn cute sometimes.

"But anyway," she said, taking a step back. "Hangers are in the other closet if you need one." She walked over to the other closet and opened it up.

"Well, would you look at that...You do own more than just pastels," he teased as he walked into her actual closet.

"Ha. Ha." She smacked his arm playfully. "I'm not wearing pastels right now, you know."

"I may have noticed," he whispered.

"I don't have the same restrictions over here that I have at my moms. I can actually be myself. My Dad is pretty awesome like that."

His hand brushed across a jacket. "I did not expect to see black leather in your closet...damn."

"What's wrong with my jacket? I'll have you know that it's my favorite."

"Nothing wrong with it at all. Just when you combine the jacket with those boots in your shoe closet, and you throw a guitar in the mix..." he turned to look at her and smirked. "It's kind of a rock 'n roll fantasy..."

Addison smacked him again. "Trouble...you know that right?" she giggled.

"Who me?" he asked sweetly, making her laugh more.

"Alright, enough feeling up my clothes. Let's get out of here so we can actually get there before tip-off." She walked out of the closet and grabbed her purse. "No need for the Maybach...guess we're taking mine….You wanna drive?" she asked jingling her keys in front of him.

"For real?"

"Yeah."

"Hmm...Do I want to drive a Ferrari from Malibu through LA to the Staples Center… Gee, Addison, I don't know…"

"It is pink..."

Zed smirked and snatched the car keys from her hand. "I don't give a shit what color it is, the answer is yes!"

Addison smiled sweetly and grabbed onto his arm, pulling him in close to her, her body pressed flush against his. "Wreck my car and I will wreck you, got it?"

"Yes, ma'am..." he smiled. "Don't take this the wrong way, but...you're kinda hot when you're threatening violence," he whispered.

Addison threw her head back and laughed. "Zed… I'm always hot."

* * *

"The first half was amazing," Zed said taking a drag from his cigarette. "We were literally sitting courtside at a Lakers game, behind Jack Nicholson...completely surreal…but, that's what life was like with her..." he shook his head and smiled wistfully. "Anyway...we didn't see the second half."

"You hooked up at the game?!"

Zed shook his head. "No, it took a few months before we were doing crazy shit like that...But the subject definitely came up that night… It was half time and I had to take a leak. By the way, drinks court-side are free. So I was in the bathroom..."

* * *

"Saw you and Addison together on the jumbotron," a voice called out from behind him as he washed his hands.

Zed turned around. "Oh, Pierce...right?" he asked, playing dumb. "Yeah, Adds invited me along."

"You get some of that yet?"

"What?"

"Addison. You hit that yet?"

"What is your deal? We're just friends, but even if we weren't..."

Pierce cut him off. "Oooh...friend-zoned. I would have thought for sure you had after her birthday party. Well, looks like I'm not the only one not getting a piece of that… Fucking tease. I put in four months of work. I even took her to prom. That bitch still didn't put out."

Zed closed his eyes and counted to ten, trying to calm his growing anger. "Wasn't she out of town for three of those months?... You were only actually together like, what, a month?"

"It shouldn't have even taken that long. It's not like she's a virgin."

Zed saw red. He grabbed him by the front of the shirt and slammed him up against the nearest wall. "That doesn't mean she owed you a damn thing! From now on...keep her name out of your mouth. Understood?" He didn't wait for a response before punching him as hard as he could in the mouth. He let go of his shirt and let him fall to the ground.

Zed quickly made his way back to the seats. "Addie...we need to go..." he said, taking her hand and pulling her away.

"Where are we going? The second half is about to start."

"Yeah...about that…" he chuckled nervously as he walked through the crowded corridor pulling her along. "We may not be making the second half." He saw a security guard up ahead and quickly changed directions, opening a random door.

Addison giggled as he pulled her in the tiniest closet she had ever seen. Zed barely fit in much less the both of them. They were completely smooshed and tangled together."Why are we in a closet?"

"Hiding from security..." he whispered, trying to ignore the feel of her smooth legs rubbing against him.

Addison let out a quiet laugh. "And why?"

"I may have punched your ex-boyfriend in the mouth."

Addison started to laugh more. "What?"

"Shhh..." he whispered, trying to hold in his own laughter.

"Did you really?"

"Yeah."

"You really are trying to live up to that bad boy persona you have at school after you supposedly punched him out last time," she whispered giggling more. "Guitars, motorcycles, cigarettes, fistfights...a girl can only handle so much!"

Zed let out a soft laugh.

"You're so telling me the whole story when we get out of this broom closet," she laughed louder.

"I'm pretty sure broom closets are bigger. And stop laughing! You're going to get us caught!"

"You do know there's a private exit we can use."

"Really?"

"This is LA, of course, there is," she smiled, cracking the door open and looking around. "The coast is clear, Rocky. Come on."

They raced through the emptying halls and down to the lower level where Addison showed their tickets to the guard.

They quickly got the car from the valet and drove out into the crowded LA streets.

"So..." Addison said smiling over at Zed. "Care to explain?"

"I was in the men's room, and apparently Pierce had seen us on the jumbotron together. He started running his mouth, and I didn't like the way he was talking about you..."

"So you punched him."

"I did owe him one."

Addison smiled and rolled her eyes. "You didn't have to defend me."

"Yes, I did. He shouldn't be saying those things about anyone, much less you."

"What did he say?"

"It's not important."

"It is to me."

"Maybe later. I wouldn't want to risk the dashboard of your ridiculously expensive car."

She shook her head and smiled again. "Fair enough….Have you ever been up to the Hollywood sign?"

"No."

She smiled over to him and made an illegal turn in the middle of the road.

"Ahh!" Zed screamed out, grabbing onto the dashboard as they changed directions illegally, narrowly missing oncoming traffic.

"Relax," she giggled. "I'm an excellent driver."

When they finally arrived, Addison parked the car and stepped out into the cool night air, walking towards the nearest observation lookout.

"Wow..." Zed said as he walked up behind her and looked out over the city. "It's beautiful...It all looks so small from up here."

"It is small….and petty... and everybody wants something from you just because of who you are," she whispered. She ran her hands through her long blonde hair and sighed. "So...spill it, slugger... What did Pierce say?"

"Addie, I…."

She turned around and looked up to him, her elbows resting on the metal guardrail behind her. "My dashboard is currently a safe distance away."

"You sure? It wasn't nice."

She nodded her head. "No bullshit."

"He was running his mouth about you being a tease and not putting out."

She sighed again. "Thought it would be something like that… It started out fun, and we sure did look good together...but I figured out pretty quickly that Pierce only asked me out for three reasons. One: I'm Missy Donnelly's daughter, Two: I'm HBIC, and Three: because he thought I'd be an easy lay."

"What a dick."

"Not really."

"I don't want details," Zed laughed holding his hands up in front of him.

"And of course we have to work together in the stupid play again this year. And I'm sure he's just loving the fact that I got the role of Estella… Did you know he has that movie poster with my mom on it hanging in his bedroom? Who does that?…. Everything with him was always about her." Addison groaned in frustration."Do you know how hard it is to date anyone in this town? Especially at our school?"

"No…."

"Well let me tell you, it's hell. Everyone wants something from you, especially when you have a last name like mine. I didn't choose this! I didn't ask to have my mother's looks or my father and grandfather's last name! I just want someone to like me for me! The same goes for my entire life! I want to make it because of MY talent. I want to earn it. Do you know how easy it would be for me to get a recording contract?"

"I..."

"All I'd have to do is say I wanted one! ….I don't want that...I don't want any of it… The houses, cars, jets...I don't care about it. Give me a guitar and a run-down studio apartment

on the strip any day," she whispered wiping a tear away as her anger ebbed.

"But where would you put your shoes?" Zed joked, wrapping an arm around her shoulder.

"Okay...maybe a one bedroom then," she smiled, leaning against his chest. "I've never told anyone any of this before," she whispered. "You probably think I'm crazy."

"No...I don't. I think it's commendable, and honestly, a little awe-inspiring."

"Really?"

He nodded his head. "I obviously can't relate to all of it, but...I do know what it feels like to want to be taken seriously for your art. You are incredible all on your own. Not just because you're an amazing musician and gorgeous. But because you're a great person, who can actually hold a conversation, and you're fun, and….and...and any guy who can't see that doesn't deserve you," he said softly as he took her hand and spun her around.

"Your girlfriend is a very lucky girl," she whispered.

Zed exhaled through his nose and slightly shook his head. "Why don't we go get into some trouble," he said with a wink.

"Running from security wasn't enough for you?" she giggled.

Zed brushed her comment off. "It's kinda my thing..." he joked.

Addison smiled wide. "Oh, why not. Carpe Noctum."

"What?"

"Seize the night...I like it a whole lot better than seize the day. Anyone can do that," she said.

"Addison Meghan Donnelly, you certainly have a way with words."

"Why thank you," she hip checked him. "So, Trouble...what kind of trouble are we going to get into?"

He looked around them. "Have you ever climbed up the letters?"

A spark gleamed in her eye. "No..."

"Well...let's seize the night!"

Addison laughed and grabbed his hand as they ran down the path. When they reached the fencing she turned to look at him. "We could get into so much trouble..."

"Apparently that's my name."

Addison bit her lip and smiled as she started to climb over the fence, ignoring the no trespassing signs.

They carefully made their way down the rugged terrain towards the base of the letters, before beginning to climb up the ladder on the side of the "H".

When she reached the top, Addison raised her hands up in the air as she threw her head back and screamed into the night air.

Zed couldn't take his eyes off her. "You're amazing..." he said looking up to her.

"What?"

He laughed and shouted, "You're wild!"

She smiled down to him. "Get your ass up here, Jacobs."

He climbed the rest of the way up, positioning himself behind her in case she fell. He wrapped an arm protectively around her waist and looked down at LA over her shoulder before turning his head towards her. "Beautiful..." he whispered.

"It is, isn't it…" she turned her face towards him, their noses brushing, "I guess I just needed a fresh perspective."

"I wasn't talking about LA..."

Addison's breath caught. They both started to lean in ever so slightly. Her eyes began to close as their lips softly touched. Suddenly a loud clap of thunder sounded and rain began to fall. They pulled away from each other and looked up to the sky.

"Really?" Addison called out. They both climbed down as carefully and quickly as they could and ran through the rain back to the car. When they finally made it in, they were both soaked and laughing.

"I'm pretty sure this is the first time it's rained since I moved here!" Zed laughed as he sat down in the passenger seat.

"Of course it would rain while we were up there," she giggled, turning on the heater in the car to help dry them out. She put her head back against the headrest and smiled. "That was a hell of a rush!"

"Yes, it was..." he whispered taking in the sight of her yet again. The soft glow from the car's control panel reflecting off of her wet skin, the serene smile across her face, the way she subconsciously moved along with the music coming from the stereo...she was the kind of girl that could inspire an entire lifetime of songs. Zed smiled to himself at the thought.

Addison reached out and turned up the radio. "I love this song," she whispered as she started singing along "Let's do some living after we die… Wild horses couldn't drag me away..."

Zed smiled over to her and started to sing as well. "Wild, wild horses, we'll ride them someday..."

They locked eyes and smiled.

"It's getting late...I should probably drive you home," Addison whispered ignoring the screaming voice inside her head urging her to kiss him again. They drove in relative silence, occasionally stealing glances at one another. Neither of them giving in to the tension building between them. When she finally pulled up to the gate of Zed's apartment complex, Zed leaned over her to swipe his access card.

"Hmm..." he said swiping the card again. "Not working..." he tried once more before sitting back in his seat. Without saying anything he got out of the car and started climbing the gate.

Addison giggled and stuck her head out of the window. "What are you doing?!"

"Getting us in!" he said with a large smile as he jumped over the gate and hit the open button. The large metal security gate slowly opened and Zed got back into the car.

She was giggling almost uncontrollably.

"What?" he asked looking over to her and joining in on her infectious laugh.

She shook her head and drove through the gate towards his building. "I always have the best time with you," she said as she pulled into an empty spot in the lot.

"I always have the best time with you, too," he said softly, their laughter finally starting to die down.

"That was the most fun I've ever had going to a Lakers game," she smiled.

"We didn't even get to stay!"

"Even still..." she whispered, reaching out and holding his hand. "Thank you for coming with me."

"Well, thank you for inviting me. It was definitely a night I will never forget," he said inching closer to her, their faces only inches apart once more.

She inhaled sharply. "I...I'll see you later..."

Zed shook his head. "Yeah..." He reached for the door.

"Zed..."

He turned back to look at her. "Yeah?"

"Thank you, again," she smiled shyly.

"I'll see you later, Adds," he smiled, getting out the car.

When the passenger side door closed, she shut her eyes, whispering "Carpe Noctum..." to herself. She opened her eyes and the car door as she got out and called after him. "Zed!"

He turned around and sprinted back towards her. "Yeah?"

She reached out and put her hands on his waist, pulling him flush against her. She stood on her tip-toes and kissed him.

Zed's head swam. All he could think about was the feel of her lips pressed against his. His hands went to her still wet hair, pulling her even closer to him as he deepened their kiss. All too soon she was pulling away.

"I'm sorry...I shouldn't have…I...I should go," she stammered out as she reached behind her for the car door.

"Addison..."

"Thanks for a great night," she whispered.

"Night, Adds," he said waving goodbye. He stood in the parking lot and watched her drive off into the night. With a heavy sigh, he turned around and walked towards his apartment.

"Hi, honey. How was the game?" His mom asked the moment he walked through the door.

"Good...great, actually…" he said quietly as a large smile spread across his face.

His mom looked up and gasped. "You're soaking wet!"

"Wha...oh yeah, got caught in that random downpour..."

She eyed him suspiciously. "Why are you smiling from ear to ear?"

"Just...the best night," he said shaking his head and smiling even more. "I'm going to go change."

She smiled and nodded. "Please...before you make a puddle on the floor."

When he got into his room he stripped off his wet clothes, tossing them onto the floor before slipping on a pair of pajama pants. He grabbed his acoustic guitar and plopped down onto his bed, strumming a tune that had been floating through his mind all night. When his phone rang a minute later, he smiled and grabbed it, hoping Addison was calling him already. His smile fell when he saw his girlfriend's name flash across the display instead. He ran his hand anxiously through his hair and watched it ring before sending the call to voicemail. As he stared at the now blank screen he ran his thumb across his lips and smiled, suddenly knowing exactly what he wanted to do. He jumped out of bed and threw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, grabbing his keys and his guitar before running out of his room.

"Mom! I'm going over to Mason's for the night!" he called out as he ran through the apartment towards the front door.

"Be careful on that thing. The roads are wet!"

"I will," he said running back to kiss her cheek. He took off down the stairs and hopped onto his black motorcycle, kicking it started.

* * *

As Addison slowly climbed the stairs to her bedroom she dialed Bree's number.

"Hey, girl!"

"Hey...how'd dinner go with your brother and his fiance'?"

"Oh, he's not coming in until tomorrow."

Addison stopped walking as realization dawned on her. "Wait...You bitch! You so set this whole thing up, didn't you? You're the one that called Mase!"

"Well, duh… It's painfully obvious that you two have this crazy chemistry together."

Addison was furious. She hung up and stormed up the rest of the steps to her room, slamming the door behind her. Bree called her right back.

"You should be thanking me, not hanging up on me. Do you know what I had to do to convince Mason not to go tonight? I had to give him my USC tickets for next weekends game and I had to watch Clueless...again! That boy seriously has an unhealthy obsession with that movie."

Addison threw herself onto her bed in frustration. "I made a complete idiot of myself tonight! I couldn't not kiss him. He's just so...UGH...What the hell is wrong with me? I am Addison Fucking Donnelly. I don't get bent out of shape over a guy! He has a girlfriend for Christ sake and this is the second time I've thrown myself at him!" She grabbed her pillow and screamed into it.

"Third," Bree corrected. "And, please! Did you know he's skipped every trip back home since he's met you?"

"What? When?"

"The first one was the weekend we all went to the movies. If I remember right, you two spent the next four hours discussing the subtle differences between psychological thrillers and horror...or something like that… honestly, I tuned you two out after we got into the hot tub at Mason's. The second one was the weekend of your birthday. Guess what you two did all night? Ignored everyone else and talked the entire time! Oh! And made out for like an hour only to pretend like neither of you remembered it the next day! You two were not THAT drunk! Don't even try to deny that one! And then the most recent time was just last weekend. He was packed and ready to go until Mason mentioned that you were going bowling with us. Once again, you two spent the entire night talking. And again, I started tuning you two out when you started droning on about the differences between fenders and Gibsons. Does that sound like someone who's pining away over his girlfriend back home? He literally passed on the chance to go see her so he could spend time with you talking about mundane shit that only the two of you could talk about for that amount of time!"

"What are you even talking abou…." the doorbell chimed, catching her off guard. Hold on Bree…." she sat back up and walked to the control panel on the wall. When she pressed the video button she let out a gasp.

"What?" Bree asked anxiously.

"It's Zed. He's at my door….I didn't buzz him at the gate..."

Bree started to laugh. "What are you doing still talking to me for? Go!"

Addison hung the phone up and tossed it on her bed. She quickly dried her eyes and ran down the staircase, pausing in the foyer to check her reflection in the large mirror. She took a deep calming breath and opened the door. Before she could say anything, he pulled her in close and kissed her with all the pent up desire and frustration that had been building between the two of them. Her hands laced through his thick dark hair as he grabbed her ass and pulled her closer to him.

"How did you..." she asked in between frantic kisses.

"I climbed the gate..." he said against her lips. "Seem to be doing that a lot tonight."

She giggled and pulled his lip in between her teeth. "But..."

He kissed her again, cutting her off. "I wrote you a song..."

"What?"

He pulled away and stared deeply into her eyes. "It's the only way I could think to tell you how I feel. Can I please sing it for you?"

Addison smiled and nodded. He ran over to his motorcycle and grabbed his guitar. "I literally started to write it in my head the second you drove off, so please...bear with me….

"Breath in for luck,  
Breathe in so deep,  
This air is blessed,  
You share with me.  
This night is wild,  
So calm and dull,  
These hearts they race,  
From self-control.  
Your legs are smooth,  
As they graze mine,  
We're doing fine,  
We're doing nothing at all.

My hopes are so high,  
That your kiss might kill me.  
So won't you kill me,  
So I die happy.  
My heart is yours to fill or burst,  
To break or bury,  
Or wear as jewelry,  
Whichever you prefer.

The words are hushed let's not get busted;  
Just lay entwined here, undiscovered.  
Safe from the hour and all the stupid questions  
"Hey did you get some?"  
Man, that is so dumb.  
Stay quiet, stay near, stay close they can't hear  
So we can get some.

My hopes are so high  
That your kiss might kill me.  
So won't you kill me,  
So I die happy.  
My heart is yours to fill or burst,  
To break or bury,  
Or wear as jewelry,  
Whichever you prefer.

Hands down this is the best date I can ever remember,  
Always remember, the sound of the stereo,  
The dim of the soft lights,  
The scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers  
And the time on the clock when we realized it's so late  
And this walk that we shared together.  
The streets were wet and the gate was locked, so I jumped it  
And let you in.  
And you stood at your door with your hands on my waist  
And you kissed me like you meant it.  
And I knew that you meant it, that you meant it,  
That you meant it, and I knew,  
That you meant it, that you meant it..." he smiled shyly up at her, waiting for her reaction.

"Get in here, Jacobs," she said with a large smile as she beckoned him inside with her finger.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Once again, I promise this whole story is not a giant flashback! Thank you so much for all the support this story has been getting, it means so much to me! If you're liking it so far, or have questions, or want to rant and rave that I'm ruining your image of Z&A (whatevs floats your boat), leave me a review and let me know! **

**Don't forget you can follow me on Instagram at By_QuietlyScreaming**

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**The Campfire Song- Spongebob Square Pants **

**Wild Horses- The Rolling Stones**

**Hands Down- Dashboard Confessional**


	5. Call Your Girlfriend

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M**

* * *

**Chapter 5**

**CALL YOUR GIRLFRIEND**

"Get in here, Jacobs," she said with a large smile as she beckoned him inside with her finger.

When he crossed the entry-way, she reached out and yanked him by the front of his shirt until he was pressed tightly against her. Licking her lips she ran her hands up until they were locked around his neck, her nails scraping lightly over the smooth skin she found there.

He couldn't help but moan as her actions sent tremors through his body and directly southward. Wrapping his arms tightly around her, he leaned down and captured her lips in another desperate kiss.

She parted her lips immediately, moaning as his tongue swept against hers. Sliding her hands down the front of his chest, she grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it up and off of him, throwing it behind her. "We should talk..."

Zed dragged his head from her lips and uttered a harsh moan as her nails raked over his bare chest, stopping to flick at his nipples before pinching each one lightly. "Talk...Definitely..." Nearly as impatient as she, he grabbed the edge of her still damp shirt and with a quick tug, had it up and over her arms, sending it flying into the far corner of the foyer as he yanked her bra out of the way. The move sent her breasts tumbling into his hands.

"Holy shit..." he growled against her lips as his thumb brushed across her nipple. "You're pierced?!"

Addison smiled and bit his lip. "I told you we all rebel where we can..."

As he looked down in amazement, he noticed a folded hundred dollar bill stuck to the side of her breast.

"Why is there money stuck to you?" he asked between kisses and soft bites.

"What?"

He pealed the bill off, holding it up to show her.

"It's my bra Benjamin," she whispered against his lips, taking it from him and tossing it aside before kissing him again. "Must have stuck when we got wet."

"Your what?"

"Bra. Benjamin. In case of emergencies."

"I don't know if that's crazy or genius..."

"I don't know why we're talking about it when my tits are literally in your hands..."

"Good point," he said kissing her hard. He began rolling her hardened nipples between his fingers, pulling ever so slightly on the metal bars, loving the whimpers falling from her lips.

Addison saw stars as currents of desire shot through her body and centered between her legs. She could feel her wetness seeping down her thighs as she unconsciously arched against him, whimpering as he thrust his leg fully between hers, the action pressing his rock hard length against her inner thigh.

"Zed...more!"

The words were more of a plea than a request and he was happy to oblige. One hand slid to her waist and within seconds, his fingers were sweeping through the soft curls at her apex. He froze when his fingertips brushed against the cool metal of another piercing. "Damn...You are full of surprises," he moaned.

Addison smiled and bit down onto his shoulder. Feeling how wet she was, he easily slid one, then two fingers into her core, groaning as her muscles clamped tightly around him.

The feeling of his fingers moving inside her was like nothing she'd ever felt before. Thrusting her body against his fingers, she frantically raced her hands down to his waist, cupping the huge bulge she found there. His gasp was enough to tell her he liked what she was doing. Quickly undoing the button and zipper of his jeans, she whimpered as she pulled him free and he thrust into her hand, hard and strong.

"Tell me what you want, Zed. How do you want me?" She knew they should stop. She knew they should probably talk about their feelings. She knew he had a girlfriend. But she couldn't bring herself to care anymore. All she could feel was a building, burning, all-consuming desire. She just wanted to please him and have him please her. Multiple times if possible.

Her words heightened his desire, giving it a sharp edge that nearly made him come right there. "Hard and fast, Gorgeous. We can do slow and long later."

"My thoughts exactly." She began using quick, hard strokes as he swelled against her palm. She whimpered as she felt his fingers keep pace with her, thrusting deeper and deeper the faster she stroked. Her body was on fire, the need to feel him inside of her nearly crippling her. "Zed...please...fuck me!"

Her guttural words were the last straw. Snarling a curse, he yanked her shorts down and whirled them both until her back came up against the door. She slid out of her shoes as she kicked her pants away. He reached into his back pocket and pulled a condom out of his wallet.

"Somebody was prepared," she smirked as she watched him roll it down his hard length.

"Always." He picked her up and pushed her further up the door as she wrapped her legs tightly around his waist.

Staring deep into her eyes, he positioned himself against her opening, stroking her slit from base to tip, hearing her whimper in ecstasy as she urged him to push further.

"You're sure?" He didn't want to stop, but he knew the choice had to be hers.

"Never more so..." she whispered biting his bottom lip. She tightened her legs and pushed forward at the exact same moment he slammed upwards. They both cried out at the exquisite sensation of being filled with the other.

Taking a moment to simply savor the feel of her muscles clamped tight around him, he managed to open his eyes and look directly into hers as he began moving with long, slow strokes, guaranteed to drive them both insane.

"Faster, Zed...I need more..." she panted out the words, pushing herself harder against him as he groaned and began slamming into her. She could feel herself hitting the hardwood door over and over.

Zed felt himself swell even more at the feral scream that emerged from Addison's throat as her inner muscles clenched him like a vise. He lost it then as she screamed his name and shook against him, her nails digging into his back in a way that was sure to leave marks. With a cry of her name, he let himself go, with several hard thrusts.

Addison felt his release and heard his pleasure in the way he cried out her name and several other curses along with it. Panting for breath, still amazed at how good he felt inside her, she allowed herself to slowly drift back to reality as they sank to the floor, wrapped in each other's arms. She softly laughed. "So that just happened..."

Zed smiled, "Yeah...it did..." He kissed the top of her head. "Are we remembering this tomorrow? Or pretending to forget like that make-out sesh the night of your birthday?"

She smiled up to him. "I definitely plan on remembering this," she whispered breathlessly as she wove her fingers through his hair and pulled him down for a kiss.

"Addison..." he pulled back to look into her eyes. "I know this cliche' but...I think I'm in love with you."

She ran a hand through his hair and kissed him softly. "Zed...please do not feel obligated to tell me that because of what we just did."

He sat up and looked at her. "I don't. Adds..."

She held her hand up to stop him. "Zed...You just fucked me up against the door in the entrance way of my house while you have a girlfriend back in Seattle."

"Definitely a first..." He smirked shaking his head.

"Please tell me that was not your first time?!"

"No...God, no… Wait...was it yours?!" he asked in a sudden panic.

"No..."

"Oh thank God… I would have never forgiven myself..." he said, the relief clear in his voice. "I just meant that I've never lost control like that before."

She smiled shyly. "Me either..." she kissed him again. "But the point remains. You have a girlfriend."

"But I..."

She cut him off again. "I'm guessing you two have shared 'I love you's'?"

"Yeah, but..."

"But what? I don't believe in love. If love was real, this wouldn't have happened."

"Ad..."

"Zed...I like you. I really, really do. More so then I've ever liked anyone else… You get me like no one I have ever known. I want to be with you, I have since that first night we hung out. But I don't do the L word. If there's even a chance that you have that with your girlfriend, I don't want to be the reason for you to end things. We can go back to just being friends...We can forget this too."

"Add..."

"And a..."

He cut her off before she could finish. "Will you let me talk for two seconds you beautiful, stubborn, girl?"

Addison smiled and waved him on.

"You are the most incredible women I have ever met in my life. You're smart, funny, gorgeous...You're passionate about music, you're hella talented..."

Addison giggled. "Go on..."

Zed smiled and placed a soft kiss on her lips. "When we kiss, it knocks me out. I never seem to be able to get you out of my head. No amount of time I get to spend with you is enough." He started to trail kisses down her neck. "What we just did doesn't disprove the existence of love, if anything it proves that love is a force of nature and no matter how hard you fight it, it's going to catch up with you. I may have thought I was in love before, but Addison...I have never felt like this. You and I have never been 'just friends', there was something there from the first moment we touched. I know you felt it too. We've been lying to ourselves since that very first night."

Addison let out a soft giggle. "We really have, haven't we."

"I don't want to forget tonight."

"Neither do I."

He leaned over and kissed her again. "And I'm willing to try to change your mind on love."

"You won't. It's just who I am."

He pulled back and looked her in the eyes again. "Well, then I guess I'm just going to have to prove you wrong."

"You're serious, aren't you?"

He nodded his head and kissed her softly. "I've never been more serious before in my life." He nipped her bottom lip before kissing her deep.

"Call your girlfriend..." she whispered against his lips.

"What?"

She sat them up and straddled his lap, kissing him hard. "If you're serious about us, then so am I. But I don't share." she reached

behind him and grabbed his phone from his discarded jeans.

"Call your girlfriend  
It's time you had the talk  
Give your reasons  
Say it's not her fault  
But you just met somebody new..." she ran her hand down the side of his face and kissed him softly.

"Tell her not to get upset  
Second-guessing everything you said and done  
And then when she gets upset  
Tell her how you never meant to hurt no one

And you tell her that the only way her heart will mend  
Is when she learns to love again  
And it won't make sense right now but you're still her friend  
And then you let her down easy

Call your girlfriend  
It's time you had the talk  
Give your reasons  
Say it's not her fault  
But you just met somebody new

Don't you tell her how I give you something  
That you never even knew you missed  
Don't you even try and explain  
How it's so different when we kiss

You just tell her that the only way her heart will mend  
is when she learns to love again  
And it won't make sense right now but you're still her friend  
And then you let her down easy

Call your girlfriend  
It's time you had the talk  
Give your reasons  
Say it's not her fault  
But you just met somebody new  
And now it's gonna be me and you..."

Zed pulled her down and kissed her deeply. "You're incredible. I lo..."

She quickly put her finger against his lips and shook her head.

"I adore you."

"I can live with that," she smiled.

He kissed her softly and looked into her eyes as he dialed the phone.

* * *

"Dude!" Bonzo said as he slammed his hands down on the table. "You broke up with your girlfriend over the phone? That's such a dick move."

"Have you met me?" Zed said with a cocky smile. "Easiest phone call I ever made in my life. I hadn't seen her in months, and Addie...there was no comparison. I fell for her so hard...I would have driven to Seattle right then and there if she had asked me to," He shook his head, smiling at the memory. "I don't think I had even taken my thumb off the end button before she was on me again. God, she was something else." He took another shot before he continued. "I definitely learned a few new things that night… Anyway, the next morning I woke up completely alone..."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****And they're FINALLY together! Yay!**

**This was originally a MUCH longer chapter, but it was getting away from me so I chose to split it in two...The good news is that the next update is coming Thursday! **

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER: **

**Call Your Girlfriend\- It feels like everyone has recorded this song, including the cast of Riverdale (shout out to WildFlowerChildGrace, who thanks to me is now OBSESSED and may be strongly urging me to use more Riverdale songs in future chapters) ...but for this particular chapter check out Clara Mae's version**


	6. Body Talks

**Chapter 6**

**BODY TALKS**

Zed awoke late the next morning to the warm Malibu sun shining on his face and a cool empty bed. He sat up and ran a hand sleepily through his hair, a large smile spreading across his face as he thought back to the night before. Not even in his wildest dreams (which there had been a few over the last month) could he have imagined the things they had done. If he hadn't thought he was in love with her before, he definitely was now. Love, lust, admiration, and awe...it was a hell of a combination. He was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of a guitar being played somewhere nearby. He stood up and looked around the room for his clothes. Nothing. He smiled and shook his head, remembering that they were somewhere downstairs. He walked out of her room and followed the sounds to the adjacent room. The music stopped. Slowly he pushed the door open. He'd seen her in various states of undress and completely naked, but the sight of her sitting on the glossy black bench of a baby grand piano, writing, wearing the sexiest black lace bra and panties...nothing prepared him for that. She dropped the music sheet onto the floor and let out a heavy sigh as she turned towards the open balcony doors.

"Morning, Gorgeous."

Jumping a little at the sound of his voice, Addison turned towards the door to find him standing there wearing nothing at all. She bit her lip and smiled.

"What were you thinking about?"

"What do you mean?" she asked scooching over and patting the bench next to her.

"I mean, you were sitting there looking far too contemplative after a night of mind-blowing sex," he offered, walking further into the room and sitting down next to her.

"Mind-blowing, huh?"

"You think differently?

"Out-of-this-world sex is more along the lines I was thinking," she said softly, leaning over to kiss him. "I didn't know how right I was calling you trouble...I think I may have finally met my match."

"That's a good thing, right?"

"It's a very good thing," she bit his lip. "It's a thing I wouldn't be averse to continuing..." She closed her eyes and leaned back in, capturing his lips in a fiery kiss. "Which is why I was in here."

"You wanted to continue on your piano?" he asked as his lips moved to her jaw.

Addison let out a soft giggle. "No...although that idea is certainly worth exploring," she moaned as his hand moved up her thigh. "I needed to sort out my feelings...so I was writing."

"Can I hear?"

"You really want to hear it?"

He nodded his head and started to trail kisses down her neck and nipping her collarbone.

"Guitar..." she moaned, holding his head against her.

"Hmm?"

"I need...guitar..." she whimpered as his mouth trailed down lower.

Zed looked up to see her blindly reaching for her acoustic next to the piano. With a soft laugh, he stopped his oral exploration of her body and grabbed the guitar for her.

Addison shook her head to clear it. "Thank you," she whispered before smiling. "You really are trouble..."

He threw her a wink. "Show me whatcha got, baby."

Addison leaned over and picked up one of the pieces of sheet music littering the ground, resting it on the bench between them. She leaned over for a quick kiss before starting to strum out a tune.

"It's electric how my lipstick  
Makes its own way right into your kiss, and  
It's pathetic how we both get  
Kinda fucked up, hanging on each other  
We're ahead now, should we slow down?  
Should we slow down now?

'Cause I'm getting some kind of shake without you

Uh-huh! I think you're movin' in too close  
But I think that it's my body wanting it the most, like  
Uh-huh! I don't know what it is I feel  
But I know it's my emotions going in for the kill, like

Uh-huh! (Uh-huh!) Uh-Huh! (Uh-Huh!)  
But I know it's my emotions going in for the kill

It's electric how symmetric  
We both get when you lay beside me  
It's phonetic how our mouths grip  
Almost too tight to the words we're sayin'  
We're in deep now, should we slow down?  
Should we slow down now?

'Cause I'm getting some kind of shake without you

Uh-huh! I think you're movin' in too close  
But I think that it's my body wanting it the most, like  
Uh-huh! I don't know what it is I feel  
But I know it's my emotions going in for the kill

Goin' in for the kill  
Goin' in for the kill

It's rare when the panic in my mind  
Feels so damn good  
Woo!" She popped the strings of her guitar to still them, shyly looking over to him.

"So...you think we should slow down?" He asked holding his breath.

She shook her head. "Quite the opposite…"

Zed grabbed her face and kissed her hard. When he finally pulled back for air, he found himself almost giddy with happiness. "So can I call you my girlfriend?" he could have cursed himself for how juvenile that sounded, unsure of why it had suddenly popped out. But the gleam in her eyes made him feel better.

Addison giggled and set the guitar down. "I'd like that..." she smiled. Slowly, her smile turned into a confident smirk. "So...just what does the title of 'girlfriend' entail?" she challenged.

Zed's grin turned predatory. If the previous night had taught him anything about the gorgeous girl next to him, it was that she could go from submissive, letting him have complete control of her body, to demanding and barking out orders, letting him know exactly what she wanted without one shred of modesty or shame- she truly was amazing. He leaned in and breathed his reply into her ear. "It's a very demanding role. During the days and evenings, you and I would have to do all the things normal girlfriends and boyfriends do, like school, dates, movies, and concerts." He moved to press a light kiss under her earlobe. "But the nights...those would be spent pleasuring each other to new heights, experimenting with just how long and how hard we could go, and then push things further." His voice was gravely as his hands cupped her breasts through the thin lace and began to knead them, his lips still planting kisses around her ear.

Addison could barely think, much less respond as she gave herself over to his words and actions. She could only moan as he bit her earlobe, soothing it quickly with his tongue. "I bet you say the same to all your girlfriends," she whispered out breathlessly.

"Only you, baby...You're so sexy, Addison, and I want to learn just how wanton and wild you can be in my arms," he continued as his hands moved lower, loving the way she was whimpering underneath his touch. "You seem so innocent and sweet at school...but now, I know better."

Addison moaned louder as he lifted her leg, pulling her onto his lap. Her back was pressed against the keys. He leaned down and sucked the flesh of her neck into his mouth, enjoying the way her pulse beat against him.

"Ugh...Do you know how painful it's going to be when I tell Bree she was right?" A voice called out.

They both stopped and looked towards the door to find Mason standing there. Zed held her a little tighter, trying to cover her as much as possible.

"Oh, so now you remember the gate code?" Addison laughed.

"I told you I knew it..." Mason shrugged. "And by the way... the front door was unlocked."

She rolled her eyes and flipped him off.

"Nice La Perla, Adds..."

"Dude!" Zed called over to him.

"What? She's my best friend...like I haven't seen the goods before. I was probably there when she bought them."

Addison just smiled. "At least this set covers more than some of my swimsuits."

"Speaking of swimsuits...Stop making out and let's go chill by the pool. It's a beautiful day and I just lost a hundred bucks to Bree...It's the least you two could do for me at this point."

Addison laughed again. She pulled Zed's face down to hers and kissed him softly. "I'll go grab you a pair of trunks, handsome. I'll be right back." She swung her leg up and over him to stand up. "Eyes off my ass, Mason. This one here has a hell of a right hook," she smiled as she walked out the room past him.

"You might want to grab the discarded clothes in the foyer too!" Mason called out after her with a laugh. He turned back towards Zed and shook his head. "So..." he said as he walked into the room and sat down behind the drum kit. "Does this mean the two of you are together, together or was it just a get it out of your system one night type thing? Not judging or anything...just trying to gauge how often I can expect to walk in and find two of my best friends naked together."

"To be fair, Addie had some clothing on..."

"Unlike you...unless we're counting nail scratches down your back as clothing...seriously, you look like you were attacked by a wild animal."

Zed ran his hand through his hair and smiled. "Basically….And we're together, together."

"And your girlfriend back in Seattle?"

"Broke up with her last night."

"Must have been a hell of a night."

"You have no idea," he smiled even wider. "But I should have broken up with her after the first time Addison and I kissed."

"Or the second."

Zed shrugged his shoulders. "Third time was the charm, I guess." They were silent for a moment before he asked, "You going to be okay with this?"

"A little late for my opinion, but as long as you treat her right I will be. If not, I've got a .45 and a shovel...I doubt anyone would miss you."

"Clueless?"

Mason shrugged and laughed. "Bree and I watched it last night."

"Dude...you do know there are other movies, right?"

"Oh, lord," Addison said as she walked back into the room now dressed in a bright red string bikini. "Are we talking about Clueless?" she tossed a pair of black trunks over to Zed. "Bree told me you made her watch it again last night."

Mason laughed and smiled. "What? I like the movie. It's a classic!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah...And you give me a hard time for loving horror movies...at least that's an entire genre," she giggled, waving him off as she watched Zed get dressed. Zed caught her looking and winked before walking over

and picking her up, capturing her lips in a kiss.

Mason made a gagging sound. "I really hope you two move past the obnoxious new couple phase quickly."

* * *

It was an absolutely gorgeous afternoon. The hot California sun was shining, and the sound of the ocean surrounded them as they lounged in the pool talking about anything and everything.

"Oh! Adds, I completely forgot to tell you," Mason said as he rolled off his air mattress into the pool to cool off. "My Dad is playing the Hollywood Bowl Halloween show. You wanna come?" he asked splashing her.

She let out a small laugh and splashed him back. "Mase...It's Halloween and the Hollywood Bowl...literally two of my favorite things. Of course!"

"What about you?" he asked Zed.

"Sure. I've never been."

"You'll love it!"Addison said, reaching out to run her fingers through his hair. "What are they doing this year?" she asked Mason.

"Zed...you might want to cover your ears..." Mason laughed. "Nightmare Before Christmas."

"Mase...Don't mess with me... You know that's my favorite animated movie..."

"I'm not! That's what they're doing!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" she launched herself off of her raft and hugged them both.

"I told you to cover your ears," Mason joked pushing her off of him.

Zed shook his head as he scooped her up in his arms. "Why am I not surprised you love that movie?"

"You don't?"

"I do actually...I'm pretty sure I went as Jack Skellington for Halloween every year for about five years."

Addison's jaw dropped for a moment before she threw her arms around him and kissed him. "Be still my heart," she giggled "I did too!"

Mason rolled his eyes. "You two are so alike, it's scary….And both of you give me a hard time for liking Clueless?!" Mason teased. "At least I'm not all dark and twisty!"

"I am not dark and twisty!"

Zed smirked at her.

"Okay, maybe a little," she shrugged as he pulled her down for a kiss.

"Ewww..."

Addison and Zed exchanged a look and nodded before splashing him.

"Oh, it's so on!" Mason called out as the three of them started splashing and laughing.

"There's my Sweet-pea!"

"Daddy!" Addison exclaimed. She jumped out of the pool and ran to hug her father. "You're home early!" She threw her arms around him, soaking his entire front. "Today just keeps getting better!"

"Ahhh! I knew I should have changed into my trunks before I came to find you," he laughed hugging her tight. "I missed you."

"I missed you too!"

He kissed the top of her head and looked at the two young men getting out of the pool. "Mason...why am I not surprised to see you here," he smiled, shaking his head. He looked over to Zed and pointed. "You, I don't know. But, I'm assuming you're the owner of the motorcycle parked outside the front door."

"Yes, sir. Zed. It's a pleasure to meet you," he said holding out his hand.

"Ah, the infamous Zed," Dale smiled shaking his outstretched hand. "My daughter has definitely mentioned you."

"Daddy!"

"What?" he asked, throwing her a wink. He turned back to face Zed. "She tells me you're quite the musician."

Zed ran his hand through his wet hair. "I'm still a work in progress, Sir."

"Modest and polite..." he looked over to Addison and mock whispered. "I like this one..."

"They're dating!" Mason called out with a laugh.

"Mason!" Addison pushed him back into the pool.

"I take my previous comment back, you're a motorcycle riding hoodlum, stay away from my daughter…."

"Sir, I...I..."

Dale let out a laugh. "I'm just fucking with you... But you're officially on notice."

"Daddy…." Addison whined. "Really?"

"What?"

"You've never threatened any other guy I've dated."

"That's because you've never dated a musician, Sweet-pea. I work with them all day, every day...Never trust a musician."

"I thought your saying was 'Never trust an actor',"

"Them either," he said with a wink.

"Says the man who married one..."

"And if I hadn't I wouldn't have the real love of my life," he smiled, booping her nose.

"Don't butter me up, old man…"

"Who are you calling old? I'm only fifty!"

"Don't forget...I'm your only child. I get to pick your nursing home!" she teased, trying her hardest not to smile.

"Aww, Sweet-pea..."

She narrowed her eyes and pretended to glare at him.

"Alright, alright…." He held his hands up in surrender. "What's it going to take for me to get back on your good side?"

Addison smiled victoriously. "Got any new tracks that need work?"

Dale let out a laugh. "As a matter of fact, I do."

"Woo! Jam session with Daddy Dale!" Mason exclaimed, jumping back out of the pool.

"For the last time Mason, don't call me that," Dale laughed. "And grab a towel! If you get that set wet, your actual Dad is going to be pissed," he called out chasing Mason into the house.

Addison looked over to Zed. "You wanna show him what you've got?"

"Bring it on, Gorgeous," he said with a wink.

She bit her lip and smiled up to him. "Let's go then..." They walked back into the house and up the stairs to the second floor. "Daddy!" Addison called out. "We're going to go grab guitars!" She continued pulling Zed along to her music room on the third floor. When they crossed the doorway she spun around and pulled him down for a kiss, lacing her fingers through his hair. "I'm so happy I can kiss you anytime I want."

"Is that all you want to do?" he asked grabbing her ass and picking her up.

She wrapped her legs around his waist and smiled. "You know it's not...but right now I really want to see you play shirtless..." she ran her hand down his abs. "You're not the only one with rock n roll fantasies..." Addison whispered into his ear before she bit down.

Zed let out a moan. "Does this mean I get to see you play in those boots and your leather jacket?"

"Maybe one day...Which guitar do you want to use?"

"I don't think I could pick..."

Addison smiled and hopped down, walking around the room and picking up a solid white flying V bass. "I'm playing this one...but all the others are up for grabs."

Zed began to scan the room. His jaw dropped open. "You have a Bubblegum fade, Gibson Les Paul, too?"

She nodded and smiled. "That one and the blueberry one at my mom's house were both presents from my godfather."

"All I ever get from my godfather is an iTunes gift card."

Addison shrugged. "He has a bit of a Les Paul obsession. It's all he ever uses when he's recording or on stage. He gave me this one after he crashed in my room while recording Living The Dream."

Zed stopped and looked at her. "Wait… Living the Dream...Les Paul guitars..." he let out a soft gasp.  
"Addison… is your godfather someone I would have heard of?"

Addison giggled. "You may have heard of him...Long curly hair, usually wears a top hat...Stage name rhymes with Dash..."

Zed looked at her again. "Are you telling me your godfather is Slash?"

She shrugged. "I just call him Saul...but yes. He and my Dad became fast friends during the Use Your Illusions recording sessions. It was the first major project my dad worked on." She gave him a coy smile. "Do you want to play it?"

"Really?"

"I mean, I understand if you don't want too...it is pink..."

"I don't give a shit what color it is! It's a Les Paul! The answer is Yes!" he said with a large smile spreading across his face. He walked over and pulled her into him, kissing her hard. "I love that I get to kiss you whenever I want."

"Is that all you want to do?" she asked biting his lip and giggling.

"I adore you."

"YO! Are you two coming or not?!" Mason called up the stairs.

Addison smiled and kissed him. "Let's go!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him down the stairs to the second floor. "Daddy's office is that way," she said pointing to the right. "Recording studio is this way," she added pulling him down the left side. "Have you ever been in a booth before?"

Zed shook his head.

"You're going to love it!" she smiled as she kissed his cheek and opened the door. She watched his face as he walked in.

"This is better than anything I could have ever imagined..." he whispered as he took in everything around him. The room was large with plush couches lining the walls. A large mixing board sat against a plexiglass divider that looked into the actual recording room.

"There you two are!" Dale said walking over to them and handing them each a piece of paper. "We're doing this jam session style."

"What does..." Zed asked suddenly confused.

Addison patted his shoulder. "Just look over the music. We'll all go in together and whatever we play we put down on tape. Easy peasy. It gives it a more organic feel."

He nodded his head and sat down on one of the couches looking over the song.

After about fifteen minutes, Addison, Zed, and Mason walked into the recording room.

"You ready?" Addison asked as she plugged into the cabinet amp.

He nodded his head and did the same, his hand shaking as he did so.

"Don't be nervous…" she leaned in closer to whisper in his ear, "Since it's your first time, I promise I'll be gentle."

Zed couldn't help but laugh. "Not your style, Adds."

It was Addison's turn to laugh. "You're right...Just be your typical cock...y self and you'll be great." Her eyes trailed down his body as she spoke.

His eyes widened. "I've never been happier to be holding a guitar in front of me..."

"You three ready?" Dale's voice filled the room.

The three of them nodded and took their spots.

"Whenever you're ready..."

Zed took a deep breath and exhaled, stealing a glance at Addison. She blew him a kiss, making him smile. He started strumming out the intro…

"Your eyes follow like a spotlight  
Two eyes like the sun  
Go ahead, keep your distance from me  
Soon you're gonna come"

Mason picked up the beat on the drums as Addison stepped closer to her microphone.

"When you flick your hair like you don't care  
And you ask me where I'm from"

"That game that you're running, baby  
You've already won," Zed sang as he blew her a kiss.

She smiled and rolled her eyes. "I need to know, know, know  
What do you need, need, need?  
What do you like, like, like?"

"'Cause I'm gonna be it tonight…  
You can be cool, you can be shy  
Say what you want, say what you like...  
'Cause ooh, your body talks, your body talks..."

"Ooh, ooh, your body talks  
You can pretend you don't wanna know  
But I read the signs from your head to your toes  
Yeah, you don't need to say a word 'cause..."

"Ooh, ooh, your body talks..." Zed pointed to her to take the verse.

"Your lips are a conversation  
That face is a song...  
If it's my imagination,  
Stop me if I'm wrong, yeah..."

He turned to face her and joined in. "I need to know, know, know  
What do you need, need, need?  
What do you like, like, like?"

Addison turned towards him and smiled. "'Cause I'm gonna be it tonight  
You can be cool, you can be shy  
Say what you want, say what you like  
'Cause ooh, your body talks, your body talks..."

"Ooh, ooh, your body talks  
You can pretend you don't wanna know  
But I read the signs from your head to your toes  
Yeah, you don't need to say a word 'cause  
Ooh, ooh, your body talks..."

They both started to move closer together as they sang the bridge together.  
"Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ooh  
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ooh  
ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ooh"

"Yeah, you know, oh, you're into this  
Yeah, you can try to hide it, but you know you can't deny it..." she sang leaning over and using his microphone.

"Ooh ooh, your body talks, your body talks."

"Ooh, your body talks, ow!" Addison sang out with the best rock cry Zed had ever heard. He bit his lip and winked at her before picking the chorus back up.

"You can be cool, you can be shy  
Say what you want, say what you like  
'Cause ooh, your body talks, your body talks..."

"Ooh, ooh your body talks..."

They moved even closer together, facing each other and using the same microphone as they sang together.

"You can pretend you don't wanna know  
But I read the signs from your head to your toes  
Yeah, you don't need to say a word 'cause  
Ooh, ooh, your body talks  
Ooh, ooh, ooh ooh, oh  
You don't need to say a word  
You can be cool, you can be shy  
Say what you want, say what you like  
Yeah, you don't need to say a word 'cause  
Ooh, ooh, your body talks..."

They rested their foreheads together both panting and trying to catch their breaths.

Mason grabbed the symbol, silencing it. "That. Was. AMAZING! Daddy Dale! Did you hear that!... We need to do this for the Spring Revue!"

Dale's voice filled the room. "I'm with Mason on this one….Can't believe I just agreed with that kid," he muttered. He quickly shook his head. "But, he has a point. You three are great together. You should definitely do this for the Revue."

"Only one problem with that," Addison said looking over to her father. "The play is the same night. And, guess what Mom made me audition for?"

"Ah...which one is it this year?"

"Great Expectations."

"That's strangely fitting..." he ran his hand through his hair. "I'll work on your mom, Sweet-pea."

"Thanks, Daddy."

"Woo!" Zed grabbed Addison and swung her around. "That was so much fun!"

Dale's voice filled the room once more. "Addie, Zed..."

He set Addison down and they faced the glass divider to the control room.

"Have you two sung together at school before?"

Addison shook her head. "Nope! This was the first time." She looked back over to Zed and smiled.

"Really?!... That was intense...You two play well against each other..."

Mason barked out a laugh. "Aren't they ridiculous? They've had that same chemistry since they met. Why do you think Bree and I set them up?"

"MASON!" Addison turned back towards him and glared.

Dale chuckled from the control board. "Zed..."

"Yes, Sir?"

"Why don't you plan to stick around for dinner, son…I have a feeling I should get to know you better...Oh, and call me Dale."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****Okay, so only three more full flashback chapters left (I think) before we catch up to their characters presently. I hope everyone enjoyed the double chapters this week! Drop me a review and let me know!**

**MUSIC USED:**

**Uh-Huh- Julia Michaels**

**Body Talks- The Struts ft. Ke$ha**


	7. Seventeen

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M, and deals with some pretty heavy subject matter.**

* * *

**Chapter 7**

**SEVENTEEN**

Zed poured himself another shot. "Yeah...her Dad couldn't talk her mom down. So, Addison continued with the play. She had the lead role, of course, with Pierce, of course," he practically growled out. "But, we were fucking inseparable from that day forward. My mom loved her to pieces, and her dad and I...well, her dad was awesome. I'm pretty sure I learned more from him than from any instructor I had at Seabrook.

Anyway... Addie was always alone at one of her parent's houses and my mom was in Seattle every few weeks. It was amazing for two kids who were constantly going at it," he laughed humorlessly. "Don't get me wrong, we definitely hit a few bumps, like that spring when I finally met her mom and when she finally met my dad…" He knocked back another shot. "That asshole...Adds decided to throw me a party for my birthday. She figured it would be a great chance for our parents to all meet. So she reserved the beach front patio at NOBU in Malibu."

"You had a birthday party at NOBU?" Bonzo asked skeptically.

"Yup...18th."

Bonzo shook his head. "Sorry, continue..."

Zed sighed. "But, the weekend before my birthday was when I met her mom. It started out great. My mom was in Seattle so Addie was spending the weekend at my apartment. She was super stressed out, which usually meant she either smoked, fucked or shopped...I knew it was bad when all three happened..." He took a drag from his cigarette. "I should have listened to her then. I should have realized just how ruthless her mom could be..."

* * *

"Addie...I'm not letting you buy me clothes. I have a job, I have some money...not Donnelly money...but still..." Zed protested as she dragged him along Rodeo Drive after school.

Addison stopped and turned to face him. "I know. But….this is probably less of an engagement party and more of a publicity grab for their new movie. There's a very real possibility that my mother is going to tip off the paparazzi. And if I'm going to have my picture splashed all across magazines wearing pastel, it's going to be Gucci."

Zed rolled his eyes. "But why do I have to get new clothes?"

She pulled him into a kiss. "Because it's going on my mother's credit card, and retail therapy makes me happier than real therapy… and… I really want tomorrow night to go well..." she added in a whisper.

"I'm not talking you out of this? Am I?"

"Nope! Besides, think of it as an investment. A Gucci suit is timeless. You can wear it when you take me to prom, too," she smiled pulling him into the store.

The second they walked in, a sales associate walked up to them. "Miss Donnelly, always a pleasure what can we do for you today?"

Addison exchanged air kisses with him. "Mother's engagement party tomorrow night. We need head to toe for both of us."

"The usual color palette?"

"For me? Unfortunately yes. For my boyfriend, no…." she looked over to Zed and smirked. "There's no way I'm forcing her stupid dress code on you."

"Thank you."

The sales associate eyed Zed up and down. "Oh, he was born to wear Gucci...his tall frame … Mmm… This one's a keeper," he whispered to Addison before walking off to gather a few selections for them.

Addison just smiled over to Zed and pulled him further into the store. Before he knew it, he was completely outfitted in a dark suit with a double G belt around his waist.

"That's the one..." she said eyeing him from head to toe. "You should go get out of that like now..."

He turned to look at her, giving her a questioning look. "I thought you just said..."

She walked up to him and wrapped her arms around him. "I really like this store and don't want to be thrown out for molesting my boyfriend...so…go change," she whispered into his ear. She took a step back, "I'm going to go try on some shoes…."

Zed shook his head and laughed. "Of course you are. I'll meet you over there."

She giggled and blew him a kiss as she walked off.

When he met her on the other side of the store a few minutes later he let out a soft laugh. "I can already feel the cuts those are going to leave on my back," he said as he looked down to the light pink stilettos with silver metal spikes lining the heel.

Addison smiled and shrugged. "They're really cute though! Oh! And I found these for you!" she exclaimed, holding up a pair of black loafers.

He shook his head and sat down next to her, slipping the shoes on to placate her.

Addison bit her lip and smiled. "You should live in Gucci shoes."

Zed looked down to his feet. "They are pretty bad-ass looking."

"Understatement. We'll definitely be getting those." She sat on his lap and whispered into his ear, "Want to help me pick out something to wear under my dress for tomorrow? La Perla is right down the street….And your little habit of ripping things off of me has severely depleted my selection at home..."

"I apologize for nothing," he smirked. "You know you love it."

"I do," she giggled. "I really do."

"What do you say we skip it and just go back to the apartment instead..."

"But we're supposed to meet Bree and Mase at In & Out and then go down to the lanes."

He pulled her down to him and kissed her. "Horror & chill?" He ran his nose along her ear. "We could watch House of a Thousand Corpses...Just the two of us…." he bit down hard, soothing the bite with his tongue. "And I'm thinking this..." he gently pulled on the edge of the gray skull print Alexander McQueen scarf wrapped around her neck, "would look great tied around your wrists..."

Without taking her eyes off of him she flagged down the sales associate that had been helping them. "We'll take it all...Just put it on my mother's account."

"Yes, ma'am...I'll have everything brought out to your car."

"You sure do know the way to my heart, Jacobs," she giggled as she stood up and pulled him out of the store.

* * *

"I fucking hate this play! It's ruining my life!" Addison said angrily the next morning as she got out of bed and pulled her pants back on. "I swear the only thing keeping me from going full Carrie on this production is Bree being there painting the scenery!"

"Wanna talk about it, Gorgeous?" Zed asked as he exhaled and held out the blunt he had just lit.

"No...I'll get over it. I just need to be a little dramatic first," she said with a heavy sigh before taking it from his hand. She inhaled deeply and held it for a moment before exhaling. "I still can't believe I have to do this stupid play instead of the Music Revue…"

"Did you ask about performing last?"

Addison shook her head. "Yeah, but they start at the exact same time. The play is going to run longer…Where's my bra?"

"Um..." He sat up and looked around his room. "I think that came off in the car last night...Why are you even doing the play? You hate it."

"Fuck it… I don't need it anyway, just remind me to look for the cash that fell out of it," she pulled her shirt over her head."And we've gone over this, I'm doing the play because of my mother."

"Adds, you're running yourself ragged trying to keep up with everything... Not that I'm complaining about your stress management techniques."

Addison smiled, climbing back onto the bed and straddling him. "Didn't think you would," she whispered as she leaned down and captured his lips in a searing kiss.

His hands went to her hair as he looked into her eyes. "God, do I adore you."

"I...I... have to get to rehearsals." She reached above him and untied her scarf from the headboard, wrapping it back around her neck. "Are you sure you don't want to back out tonight? I mean, I would if I could."

"And miss your mom's engagement party? Are you kidding me? How many times does an opportunity like that happen," he teased.

Addison let out a soft giggle as she leaned down and placed a kiss on his neck. "You know what they say...seventh time is the charm."

"I'll meet you at your Dads after rehearsals."

Addison cringed. "No...my step-brother is still in town. He's still pissed off that he walked in on us the other day."

"I am so glad you were on top," he said with a laugh, burying his face in her chest.

"Yeah...probably a good thing he didn't see your face. We don't need you ending up on a hit-list."

Zed swallowed loudly. "Want to just get ready here after practice? All the clothes you bought are still in the car," he said pulling on the metal bar of her piercing with his teeth before sitting back up and kissing her. "I don't have a fancy vanity area or anything...but I'll let you have the bathroom first."

"That could work..." she bit her lip and looked at him through her lashes. "Wanna give me a ride to campus then? I can just leave my car here."

He grabbed onto her ass. "Are you trying to get me worked up again. You know I can't handle how sexy you look on my bike."

"Screw rehearsals..." she pulled his face to hers and kissed him as he rolled them back over.

* * *

"Girl you look delicious...oh I mean, gorgeous," Zed sang as he wrapped his arms around her waist and gently bit her neck.

Addison giggled and pulled his face up to hers for a kiss. "Delicious, huh?"

He nodded his head. "Seriously, Adds. You look hot," he whispered into her ear as he ran his hand down her hips, feeling the soft lace of her baby blue dress hugging her curves.

"I'm always hot," she said with a wink. "But you sir..." she turned around in his arms and wrapped her arms around his neck, "are absolutely mouthwatering in that suit."

"I adore you," he whispered, nipping at her nose.

"I..." she closed her eyes and exhaled. "We should probably get going..."

He lifted her chin, "Hey...you okay?"

"I'm fine. Just..." she looked up into his eyes and sighed heavily. "Z...promise me something."

"Anything."

"No matter what happens at this party.

You'll still look at me like this...like I'm the only thing you see."

"Adds...You ARE the only thing I see. Nothing is going to change that." He leaned in and kissed her softly. "Besides...It can't be that bad. She's your mom."

"Don't say I didn't warn you..."

* * *

As they pulled up to the house, Addison put out the backwood that they had been smoking and popped a piece of juicy fruit gum into her mouth, handing one to Zed as well.

"Thank you, Baby," he whispered leaning over to steal a kiss. He looked up into her eyes and smiled. "I adore you."

Addison smiled and kissed him. "You sure you want to do this? Last chance to back out…"

"We've been together for five months...Don't you think it's time I met her?"

"Alright...don't say I didn't warn you..."

"You keep saying that," Zed laughed.

"And you keep not listening," she whispered as she opened the car door. The moment she stepped out of the car, she was blinded by camera flashes. "Ugh..." she rolled her eyes and grabbed Zed's hand. "I knew this was going to happen. Fucking paparazzi…Just smile and walk." she mumbled under her breath as they made their way towards the back of the house.

"Well, that was fun..." Zed laughed as they finally walked into the back yard. He let out a low whistle. "And I thought the yard was impressive when you threw a party," he whispered placing a soft kiss under her ear.

"Addison, darling," her mother called waving to get her attention.

"Ready or not...you're about to meet the Wicked Witch of the West." Addison plastered a fake smile across her face and grabbed Zed's hand as they made their way over towards the temporarily floored over pool.

"Mother," she said overly sweetly. "Congratulations!"

"Oh, thank you, darling. I know you are just going to love Paul!"

"Oh, I'm sure..." Addison looked around. "Where is he? I can't wait to meet him."

Missy looked around them and frowned before quickly catching herself and smiling again. "He's just over there."

Addison turned to look. "You mean the guy flirting with the very attractive male caterer?"

"He's not flirting...he's just...very expressive when he talks."

"Right….So, um...this is Zed...my boyfriend."

Missy looked over and noticed him for the first time. "What happened to Pierce? He was such a lovely young man."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Mom, I told you that we broke up before school started. I've been with Zed since right after my birthday...remember...we talked about this..."

Missy waved off her comment. "Of course I remember, darling. Zed...yes...you're in the music program, correct?"

"Yes ma'am," he said politely. "Thank you for inviting me this evening. Congratulations."

"Thank you...and I didn't." She clapped her hands together and smiled. "But, that's neither here nor there. So, Zed...tell me. What is it your family does?"

"Um...my mom is a nurse and my dad is a CFO for an up-start back in Seattle."

"Ah...I see." She looked past them and waved to someone. "If you'll excuse me, I need to go greet a few actual guests that just arrived. Addison, darling...I'd skip the dessert this evening. You're looking a little poochy." With that, she brushed past them to the other end of the yard.

"Well...that went better than I expected..." Addison shrugged from next to him.

"Seriously?"

She nodded her head.

"She's kind of terrible...How are you related to her?"

"You know, I ask myself that same question with some regularity..." she shook her head and smiled. "Come on...at least I know the dessert is going to be good."

Zed let out a soft laugh and smiled as she took his hand and pulled him along.

The party was dull but they made the best of it, silently laughing and making fun of the snooty guests that roamed around the yard as the night wore on.

"Okay, I'm so over this. I'm going to go say goodbye to my mother and then we can bounce the f out," she smiled as she pulled him in for a quick kiss.

"Sounds good...I'm going to stay right here… away from your mother."

"Probably for the best!" she giggled before walking across the yard to find her mom. She spotted her next to the bar finishing off a glass of champagne.

"Mother..." Addison said as she walked up next to her.

"Addison, darling,"

"...I was just coming to..."

"I was hoping to catch you before you ran off to do God knows what with that boy," Missy said cutting her off. "Why did you skip play rehearsals today?"

"Excuse me? How did you..."

"Play rehearsals. You weren't there and I want to know why."

"I had other commitments today. I'm allowed to miss a few rehearsals given my extracurricular involvement."

"Slutting it up isn't an extracurricular, dear."

"You would know..."

Missy rolled her eyes. "Please tell me you're at least using protection."

"What?"

"The two of you couldn't be more obvious. The longing glances, the stolen kisses. The last thing we need is you sullying up the family tree with some illegitimate child because you decided to go through a rebellious phase…" Missy grabbed another glass of champagne and lowered her voice. "At least with your new boyfriend in the picture I know you'll stay away from Paul."

Addison looked around in surprise. "Mother, I think you need to lay off the champagne," she whispered trying to keep their conversation from being overheard, knowing she would be blamed if Missy's behavior was somehow shared with the gossip magazines.

"And I think you need to get rid of your charity project," Missy snapped. "He's beneath you."

Addison suddenly didn't care who overheard. She was used to her mother attacking her, but Zed had never done anything to deserve her derision. "Which one is it? Are you happy I have a boyfriend or do you want me to get rid of him?!"

"Both!"

"Why?"

"Because you're a Donnelly and he's a nobody. He'll only ever use you," Missy spat out.

"You were a nobody before you met Daddy. Are you saying you used him?"

Missy glared at her and grabbed her arm. "I loved your father but I was young and stupid. You are not going to repeat my mistakes. You have no use for love this young. Do you hear me."

"Thank you for reminding me yet again that I was a mistake." Addison pulled away and raised her voice loud enough for others to hear. "Thanks for the pep-talk Miss Havisham."

Missy glanced nervously around, noticing the looks and whispers of her guests. She plastered a smile on her face and laughed. "Oh, please, darling…you know I played Estella."

"Yeah, I know...everyone knows...Now if you'll excuse me," she turned and walked over to her mother's new fiance who was having yet another expressive conversation with yet another very attractive male caterer. "I'd say it was nice meeting you, and I look forward to us becoming a family, but let's be honest here...you probably won't even make it to the alter...so…good luck." Without another word, she stormed off back across the yard to where she had left Zed.

Addison grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the driveway, swiping a glass of champagne from a waiter and downing it as she walked.

"Um...Adds..." Zed whispered taking in her murderous expression. "Is everything, okay?"

"Not now, Z...get in," she growled as she unlocked the car door. Zed had barely closed the door when Addison floored it, peeling out of the driveway. Zed grabbed onto the glove box, his knuckles turning white as she accelerated faster through the twists and turns of Beverly Hills.

"Baby...maybe you want to slow down a little?"

Addison didn't answer. She sped up further. The faster she went, the more her emotions caught up with her. By the time she merged onto the freeway, she was starting to cry.

"Addison, pull over."

She shook her head and accelerated faster, the speedometer now reading over 100.

"Addison, baby..." Zed whispered placing a hand on her leg. "I know you're an excellent driver, and I know an actual formula one racer taught you, but you need to pull over. You're upset and you had champagne. If we get pulled over, it's not going to be pretty."

She turned her head to glare at him but took her foot off the accelerator. "FINE!" She hit the brake and pulled over on the shoulder. She threw the car into park and undid her seat belt, climbing over the center console and straddling him as she crashed her lips into his.

"What is going on?" Zed asked between frantic kisses.

"Say you're with me for me and not because of my family."

"Addison..."

"Say it, Zed!"

He grabbed her face and kissed her roughly. "I am with YOU. I don't care who your parents are. I don't care what they do. You know I lov...I adore you."

"You and me, right?"

"Always."

She kissed him again, before sliding her hand straight down to his zipper, freeing him into the warm night air.

"Adds..."

"I need you, Zed...Please, fuck me." Her words were almost desperate as she reached for her purse and pulled out a condom. "Please..." she leaned down and bit his neck hard, making him moan loudly.

He grabbed the condom from her and ripped it open. He had barely finished rolling it down his length when she lowered herself down onto him. The cries that escaped them both did not sound human.

Zed knew he was lost as he brought his hands to her hips and arched hard up into her. Her inner muscles clamping down on him with a strength he wasn't even aware she had as she rode him frantically. Needing more, he ripped the buttons on the front of her dress open and yanked her bra down, capturing a breast in his mouth. He loved the small scream she made as he bit down harder and ran his tongue along her piercing. He was fast nearing the point of no return when her thrusts sped up.

Addison let herself go, getting lost in the feelings, arching against him over and over again, feeling his hands pull her hard to him, arching up to meet her. He felt so hot and hard, thrusting over and over into

her heated center. She sped up her movements, uncaring that the hard thrusts pushed her back into the glove box. She was unable to feel anything but Zed's body thrusting into hers, his teeth against her breast, his growls and moans turning her on even more.

She managed to pry open her eyes and smiled at the strain on his face she could see as he fought to hold back his release until she gained hers. She smiled and reached down to bite his neck again.

"Come for me, Zed...fuck me," she whispered, hearing him groan as his hands tightened on her waist, slamming her hard against him, going even deeper into her body.

She screamed as her release broke over her like a tidal wave. She cried out his name, over and over again as she felt the desire nearly knock her senseless, her body clamping down around him, shuddering with every wave that swept over her.

Zed knew he was going to lose it, and her whispered words sent him over the edge. With a growl of her name, he felt himself explode into her body, the waves of release pounding over him. He released himself into over and over as she shuddered against him. He couldn't seem to stop the tremors that wracked his body, feeling ecstasy like he'd never known course through him.

Finally, he felt her coming back down. He gently pulled her head until it rested against his neck. He sighed as he felt her body go limp against his. As the lethargy swept over his body, his mind suddenly cleared becoming aware of exactly where they were and what they'd just done.

Addison too seemed to come to the realization of where they were as she pulled back to look into his eyes, her own beautifully sated and shining.

"We're still on the side of the fucking freeway..." she managed before breaking into a giggle.

"We should probably move..." he said with a contented smile on his face and amusement in his eyes. He ran a hand through her long blonde hair. "You okay?"

She shook her head. "Not really, but...this certainly helped."

He wrapped her up in a tight hug. "Wanna talk about it?"

"Not here..."

"Hollywood sign?"

She nodded her head against his neck and placed a soft kiss on his jaw. "I think you should drive...I'm spent in every way possible."

Zed smiled and kissed her cheek. "You got it, beautiful." They both straightened their clothes before he got out of the car and walked around to the driver's side to drive them to what had become their spot.

"So..." he asked once they were parked and walking down the familiar path down towards the lookout point. "What happened?"

"My mother."

Zed looked over to her waiting for her to explain further.

With a heavy sigh, she continued. "She doesn't approve of our relationship...thinks I'm sleeping with you as a rebellion thing and that you're using me for my name...Thinks I'm going to get knocked up and further damage her reputation..."

"Oh...Well, that's certainly a lot to take in..."

"Yeah..."

"Addison, you know I'm not with you because of that...right?"

She turned to look at him, pulling him in for a kiss. "I know that. And...I don't care what she thinks about us."

"And if she's so concerned about you getting pregnant, why won't she let you take birth control? Don't get me wrong, I'm all for condom usage and safe sex, but a backup would be nice."

Addison cracked a grin and kissed him again. "She did my freshman year but it made me gain five pounds. So, she pulled me off of it."

"That doesn't even make sense..."

"That's my mother for you," she sighed as they walked further down the trail.

"Why is she so…."

Addison let out a humorless laugh. "Controlling, terrible, mean..."

"Yeah...all that."

"There's a rather long list of reasons she's given me over the years as to why I've made her this way."

"Seriously?" he asked, gripping her hand tighter and stopping.

Addison turned to face him. "Yeah. She's never hidden the fact that she feels I ruined her life… even when I was little."

"That's horrible."

She shrugged. "It's all I've ever known."

Zed shook his head in disbelief. "What could she possibly..."

Addison took a deep breath. "What could she possibly blame me for? Let's see...She got pregnant with me at 22. She couldn't celebrate winning her first Oscar because she had just found out she was pregnant with me. She lost out on her next big role because she was pregnant with me. I ruined her body, forcing her to get plastic surgery. A couple of years later she lost her second Golden Globe nomination because she said she was too distracted by me being sick while she was filming to give her best performance. She had to give up rolls because she couldn't have a child on set. She couldn't carry on an affair with one of her directors because I walked in on them and inadvertently told my dad, which led to the divorce, which she blames me for because it 'tarnished her image'...um, let's see what else...Husband number 2 left because he didn't want a kid around…But..." her voice dropped to barely a whisper. "Fiance' number 6, who happened to become husband number 4..." she wrapped her arms around herself. "He was the final nail in the coffin."

"What happened with him?"

Addison turned to look at him. "It's not a good story..."

He pushed her hair behind her ear and kissed her gently. "I want to know everything about you."

She smiled sadly. "The only people who know are my Mom, Dad, and step-brother..." she reached out and ran her hand through his hair as she looked into his eyes, searching for something. "I trust you, though...but you have to promise me something."

"Anything,"

"You won't pass judgment on me, or look at me any different once I tell you."

"Addison, I may not know every detail that's shaped you, but I know who you are, and I adore you."

"You also can't interrupt me."

"I make no promises."

She kissed him softly. "Try?"

He nodded his head and wrapped his arm around her.

"The summer between eighth grade and freshman year we were vacationing in Italy on Lake Como. My mom and her newest husband had been drinking all day with their friends while I was stuck in the villa studying for ninth grade algebra. Well, my mom stayed out while he came back to the villa to 'rest' before dinner." She took a shaky breath. "Did you know that I look just like my mother did when she made her first movie?… At least that's what he told me as he covered my mouth to keep me from screaming."

Zed tightened his grip on her.

"When he was finished, he threw my shorts back at me and told me to freshen up...we had dinner reservations and I was expected to be there... Then he left..."

"Addison, I..."

She placed her finger against his lips and shook her head. "If you start then I won't be able to finish..."

He nodded his head and kissed the top of her hair.

"I went upstairs and cried for a few hours... then I called my Dad..." she wiped a tear from her eye. "I didn't even tell him what happened. He answered the phone and I was crying. He showed up the next day. My mom was hungover and didn't understand why he was there...he just pushed past her and found me. I had barricaded myself in my room...I hadn't even slept…But when I heard his voice, I knew I was safe," she sadly smiled. "I told him everything….My mom blew a gasket when he told her that he was bringing me to the hospital. She didn't believe any of it, even when he showed her my ripped clothes. Said I was making it up for attention...It didn't get much better after the doctor confirmed everything I said. She blamed me. Said I must have seduced him to try to ruin their marriage...because I mean, what thirteen year old isn't doing that," she scoffed. "But yeah...Daddy wanted to kill him but at the very least press charges, Mom just wanted it kept out the papers..."

"What ended up happening?... Oops, sorry..."

Addison shook her head and leaned into him. "Daddy asked my soon to be high school senior step-brother to call in a favor…Apparently, there are still members of his 'family' in Italy," she shrugged. "I don't really know what happened. But I heard that there was a horrible boating accident after I left to go back to the states with my Dad."

"If I wasn't already terrified your step-brother would have me offed, I definitely am now."

Addison softly laughed. "He knows I would take him out before I let him get close enough to you...Anyway, I kind of slipped into a pretty major depression once I was back state-side. I dyed my hair dark brown to try to change any similarity with my mom. That was a horrible look, and I will never make that mistake again," she said shaking her head.

Zed chuckled at the unexpected lightness in her tone.

"Saw a therapist in the Hamptons and I continued seeing one when we got back to LA...and then one day something was said to me that finally sunk in. Everyone deals with trauma differently. I can choose to let it define me or I can define myself. I decided right then and there that I would not let what happened to me impact the rest of my life. I chose to reclaim my sexuality and own it. He may have taken my first time from me, but I damn sure wasn't going to let him take the enjoyment out of it for the rest of my life." She turned to look at him. "So...there it all is."

"Addison..." he turned her face to look at him. "I'm so sorry."

"Please don't feel sorry for me. I'm fine. It happened, it sucked, but I've moved on with my life. I may have a few unhealthy coping mechanisms, but..." she shrugged and smiled.

"Why are you still living with your mom after all that? Why are you following any of her 'rules'? The clothes, the acting, the insane schedule she has you on?"

Addison let out a laugh. "I don't know if you are aware of this...but my mom...she's a REALLY good actress, I mean she's a horrible person, but her acting...it's spot on." She sighed heavily. "My dad filed for full custody after everything happened that summer. But...mom put on

quite the Oscar-worthy performance. By the end of the hearing, the judge was granting her full custody and I was being shipped off to Switzerland for high school."

"What?"

She nodded her head. "My Dad lost it. They were going to hold him in contempt. But, his lawyers calmed him down. They ended up coming to an agreement behind closed doors. I got to stay with my dad half the time, but my mother somehow became the executrix of my trust."

"So it's about money?"

Addison shook her head. "I told you I don't care about the money. But I do care about my Dad who happens to care about Bamm!, and she knows that. She got a seat on the board in the divorce, and after the hearing, she then got my seat as well until I'm 25. It was a complete power move to keep me in line. She constantly threatens to use her two votes to sell it off...I can't let that happen. It would crush my Dad. My grandfather built that label from nothing. It's my families legacy. And I'm the only child of the only child of the founder...FUCK!" she screamed out as her hands went to her hair in frustration. "I've learned to never underestimate just how low my mother will go."

"That's terrible..."

"That's my mother..." she wiped a tear from her eye. "I just wish I could be a normal seventeen-year-old...What am I going to do?"

Zed pulled her back into his arms. "I've got a crazy idea…" he kissed her softly and looked into her eyes. "Let's be normal, see bad movies...Sneak a beer and watch TV..."

"I hate beer."

"Fine, tequila…We'll bake brownies or go bowling...Don't you want a life with me?" he sang kissing her softly.

Addison smiled and joined in. "Can't we be seventeen? That's all I want to do..."

"If you could let me in  
I could be good with you"

"People hurt us..."

"Or they vanish  
And you're right, that really blows  
But we let go  
Take a deep breath  
Then go buy some summer clothes."

"I do like to shop..." she smiled.

"We'll go camping"

"You mean, glamping."

"Play some poker...And we'll eat some chili fries"

"Yeah, those will go straight to my thighs," she giggled, as she grabbed his hands and spun them around. "Maybe prom night, maybe dancing...Don't stop looking in my eyes"

"Your eyes"

"Can't we be seventeen  
Is that so hard to do?

"If you could let me in  
I could be good with you"

"Let us be seventeen  
If we still got the right"

"So what's it gonna be?"

"I wanna be with you"

"I wanna be with you  
Wanna be with you tonight"

"Hold me tighter, even closer...Can't we be seventeen...Your love's too good to lose..."

"I lov...I adore..." he took a deep breath and looked into her eyes. "Fuck it...I love you, Addison."

"I adore you," she smiled leaning in and kissing him.

Zed pulled back and laughed. "Progress! I can live with that."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****Sorry for the lack of updating! With the end of the school year and the beginning of summer, things have been a bit busy. Credit where credit is due… The chapter title, song used, singing in the Hollywood Hills...none of it would have happened without WildFlowerChildGrace insisting (that's putting it lightly) that I use Seventeen from the Riverdale Episode, Big Fun (Heathers the Musical). **

**Music Used:**

**Seventeen****\- Riverdale Cast (Lili Reinhart, Cole Sprouse, Madelaine Petsch, Vanessa Morgan)**


	8. The Only Exception

**Chapter 8**

**THE ONLY EXCEPTION**

"You've officially ruined Missy Donnelly movies for me forever," Bonzo said grabbing the bottle of Jack from the table and pouring himself another shot.

"You have no idea...that woman is the devil incarnate." He shook his head in anger. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't picture her more than a few times while we were in active combat." He leaned back against the wall and looked up towards the ceiling, attempting to control the rage running through his veins. A few moments passed before he took the bottle back from Bonzo and took a large sip.

"The next weekend was my party. Missy and Paul couldn't make it...we were really torn up about that fact..." he muttered sarcastically. "But everyone else was there. Mason, Owen, and Bree...My parents...even Zoey..." he smiled at the memory. "She was only seven, cute as a button...I'll never forget how big her eyes got when she met Addie..."

.

* * *

"Zed!"

Zed and Addison turned around just in time to see a small blonde hair girl fly through the air. Zed caught her and hugged her close.

"I missed you so much!"

"I missed you too, munchkin!"

Addison looked at them and couldn't help the large smile that crossed her face.

"Hey, I want you to meet someone..." He said turning so that his little sister was facing her. "This is my girlfriend, Addison."

"You must be Zoey! Your brother talks about you all the time!"

"It's very nice to meet you, Addison."

"It's very nice to meet you as well! I heard that you like cheerleading."

"I do! Cheering makes me happy."

"Me too!"

"You're a cheerleader?"

"She's not just a cheerleader, Zo...she's the captain of the squad," Zed said smiling over to Addison.

"Really?" Zoey's eyes grew impossibly large.

"Really! Maybe if it's okay with your parents we could work on some stunts down on the beach before dinner."

Zoey couldn't wriggle out of Zed's arms fast enough. The second her feet touched the ground, she ran across the patio to her mom.

"Do I get to come watch?" Zed whispered as he wrapped his arms around Addison from behind and kissed behind her ear. "I adore you."

She giggled and pulled his face up to hers to kiss him. "I adore you, too."

The sound of someone clearing their throat interrupted them. Zed's back straightened and he held her a little tighter. Slowly he turned them around. "Hi, Pops."

"Zed..."

"Adds, this is my Dad, Zevon Jacobs...Pops...this is my girlfriend, Addison Donnelly."

Addison held out her hand. "It's nice to finally meet you, Mr. Jacobs. I'm so glad you could make it down from Seattle."

"It's nice to meet you too. And thank you for hosting tonight, I hope it wasn't too much trouble."

Addison smiled sweetly. "It's no trouble at all. My Uncle Bobby is one of the owners. When he heard the party was for Zed...he insisted we have it here. I really didn't have to do much!"

Zed gave her a questioning look. "You have an Uncle Bobby? Have I met him?"

"Not a real uncle…Just a really close family friend. And no...but if you ever do meet him, don't call him Bobby. He hates it...I'm literally the only one who can get away with that," she smiled. "The perks of being a cute kid!"

"What do I call him then?" he laughed.

"Rob? Robert? Mr. De Niro?...I'm sure any of those would work."

Zevon suddenly had a coughing fit. "Robert De Niro?"

Addison looked back over to him and nodded. "Yes, sir."

"You know De Niro?"

She smiled and nodded again. "He and my grandfather were good friends and golf buddies. He lives right down the street."

"Addison! My mommy said yes!"

Addison turned around to see Zoey running back over to them. "Great!" She turned back towards Zed's father. "I promised your daughter we could work on some cheer stunts down on the beach. Feel free to order whatever you like from the bar. It's on the house. It was very nice to meet you, sir."

"A pleasure to meet you too, Addison. Have fun, Zoey!"

"I will Daddy!"

Zed squeezed Addison's hand. "I'll be right down."

"See you in a few then," she kissed his cheek and walked off to stunt with Zoey.

Zed smiled as he watched her walk off.

"Well, you've certainly done well for yourself."

He turned to look back at his father. "What?"

"I didn't stutter, and I don't repeat myself."

Zed closed his eyes and shook his head. "Sorry. I'm not sure how I should respond to your comment."

"She's very pretty. I'm guessing wealthy as well?"

"Pops..."

"What game are you playing here, son."

"I'm not playing any game."

His father scoffed.

"Seriously, I don't care what her family does for a living or how much money they have. Addie is amazing all on her own."

"And what is it exactly that her family does?"

Zed ran his hands through his hair in frustration. "Not that it matters, but her Dad is a music producer and her mom is an actress."

Zevon let out a laugh. "So you just happen to be dating the daughter of a producer, after splitting our family apart to attend a ridiculous, pompous, arts school… Please, I don't buy it for a second… You never were happy with what we could give you, always looking for something better... wait...Donnelly? Any relation to Missy Donnelly?"

He nodded. "Her mom."

"Of course..." Zevon shook his head and walked off.

Zed let out a frustrated sigh and turned around, almost running into Dale on the steps down to the beach. "Oh, sorry, sir..."

Dale let out a chuckle. "For the hundredth time, son. Call me Dale."

"Sorry, Dale."

"It's fine, Zed. Happy birthday."

"Thank you."

"You alright? You seem to be lacking the typical swagger I've come to expect..."

Zed nodded his head. "Yeah...just trying to recover from an always pleasant father/son chat."

"Ah..."

"Yeah..."

"Listen, Zed… I know things haven't been easy with you and your dad, especially since you moved down here."

Zed gave him a surprised look.

"What? Your mom and I have to talk about something when you and Addie run off together..."

Zed just rolled his eyes and smiled. "I swear you two gossip more than the cheer squad at school."

"Hey! I've heard some of that gossip...be lucky I choose to ignore it."

Zed swallowed loudly as Dale chuckled.

"Look...It's not always easy for us Dads to accept the fact that our kids are capable of making decisions for themselves. You made a pretty big decision to come down here for school."

"We had issues before the move…it's nothing new... but now he thinks I'm only with Addie because of you."

Dale let out a laugh. "I'm flattered."

"It's the same thing her mother thinks too," he shook his head sadly.

"Zed...you've been over to my house every other week since you and my daughter started dating. Not once have I ever gotten that impression."

"I swear, I'm not using her. I lo…." he stopped himself. "I adore her."

"She has you on L word lock-down, doesn't she?"

Zed couldn't help but laugh. "Maybe… She's only let me say it a couple of times."

"Addie can be a bit...stubborn. Give her time," he smiled, patting him on the back. "But in the meantime, don't listen to the critics. Just because your dad couldn't cut it as a musician, doesn't mean you won't."

"How did you..."

Dale shrugged. "Like I said, your mom and I talk."

* * *

"The party was fucking lit. If we have enough money by the time the tour pulls into LA, we're definitely hitting up NOBU. Best sushi of my life. The one in New York has nothing on the Malibu location."

Bonzo laughed. "Like we're going to have that kind of money."

"Start saving now," he teased. "But yeah...I spent the entire evening avoiding my Dad. And he spent the entire evening taking advantage of the free drinks. I don't think anyone even noticed until Addison gave me my birthday present."

* * *

Zed smiled and blushed as everyone around him sang Happy Birthday. He took a large breath and blew out the candles.

"So, birthday boy...what did you wish for?" Addison whispered in his ear as their families and friends cheered.

He turned and threw her a wink. "I'll have to show you later."

Addison mouthed the word "trouble," as she stood up. She held up her glass and tapped it to get everyone's attention. "Thank you so much for coming out tonight." She turned to face Zed. "I know you said 'No presents, Adds...seriously, you're throwing me a party. That's way too much..." she said doing a poor impression of him and making everyone around the table laugh. "But you only turn eighteen once, and I wanted to get you something special...so get over it!" She reached under the table and pulled out a long, heavy box wrapped in sparkly green paper.

"Adds..." he protested.

"Oh just open it," she pushed him playfully.

Zed rolled his eyes and started to undo the paper. When the paper was finally off, he took off the top of the gift box. His jaw dropped open and he turned to face her.

She motioned for him to keep opening.

He turned back towards the box and flipped open the latches on the case. "Holy shit!"

"Zed! Language!" Zyla scolded, covering Zoey's ears.

"Sorry, mom...but..." he opened the lid wider for everyone to see. "Come on!"

"Do you like it?" Addison asked anxiously.

"Like it? Are you serious?" he stood up and picked her up, swinging her around. "You got me the Les Paul Green Ocean Burst I was drooling over! I more than like it! I love it! It's literally my dream guitar, woman! How did you know?"

Addison giggled as Zed set her back down on her feet and smacked a loud kiss on her cheek. "Really? I've seen the way you eye up mine! And your favorite color is green. I took a chance and went with the burst over the fade, but Mason assured me it was the right choice."

"Told you so," Mason called out.

"I can't believe I own a Les Paul..."

"You can't be the best if you don't play on the best...and Julliard only

takes the best."

"Must be nice...being able to just buy something like that on a whim," Zevon practically sneered. "Tell me, Addison, are you applying for Julliard as well or will you be attending a real college?"

Everyone around the table was silent.

Addison smiled and said politely, "Neither, Mr. Jacobs. My dream is to play music, and I've been very fortunate to be surrounded by and learn from the best my entire life. If I went to Julliard I'd probably find myself being terribly bored and taking the place of someone who actually wanted to attend and would benefit from their amazing program...like Zed."

"That sounds awfully entitled..." he took a sip of his drink.

"Zevon!"

"Pops!"

"I can see why my son's with you...question is, why are you wasting your time with him."

Addison placed her hand on Zed's arm. "Sir...with all due respect, your son is incredible, and I am so grateful that I have him in my life. He's the sweetest most sincere person I've ever met. He's extremely talented and has a clear vision of his future. You should be very proud of him."

"I'd be proud of him if he lived up to his potential and took academics as seriously as he does music. It's not like he can actually make a living with it."

Dale stood up and walked behind Zed, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Actually, I've had the chance to hear Zed play on quite a few occasions while he and Addison were in my home studio. He's quite gifted. The music program at Seabrook is one of the most rigorous programs there is in the country, and both our kids are excelling. They work hard and it shows. If he continues his studies at Seabrook next year, I'm certain he'd be a shoo-in for Julliard. And if not, I'd be more than happy to help him explore other avenues in the industry. He has a lot of potential. He absolutely can make a living off of music."

"Let's be honest here, you're only saying that because he's dating your daughter."

"Quite the opposite. I didn't want to like him because he's dating my daughter. But...despite my initial feelings, Zed has proven on numerous occasions to be an upstanding young man who also happens to be incredibly talented."

* * *

"Wow…," Bonzo mumbled under his breath as he shook his head.

"Yeah...Lucky for me my mom was an excellent subject changer and quickly reminded everyone that there was cake," Zed smiled.

"So that's why you're so protective of your guitar."

"Yup, lost it once...never again..." He took another drag of his cigarette. "Pops and Zoey left for Seattle the next morning. Didn't see them again until the night of the Revue... That fucking night..." he shook his head and smiled. "Best fucking night ever…"

* * *

Addison stared up at the sky blowing smoke rings as she thought back to the night of the play and the Revue. Three small words declared for the first time, changing her world forever. There were days she wished she could take that night back, but deep down she knew she wouldn't have changed a thing.

* * *

Intermission. Halfway done. Addison sat in her dressing room and looked around at the bouquets of flowers that surrounded her. Light pink roses from her mom, reminding her to enunciate properly. A bouquet of sweet-pea flowers from her dad, telling her how proud he is of all that she does. Bright blue orchids from Bree, sending good vibes, and dark pink Gerber daisies from Mason, requesting that she not actually break her leg. Her favorite though was the small vase of Queen of the Night tulips. Before she even opened the card, she knew exactly who they were from. Of course, he would remember her favorite flowers. The note was simple. "I adore you." No name, nothing else. It was perfect. She held the card close to her heart and smiled. In less than six months he had managed to turn her world upside down. Love wasn't supposed to be real. But here she was, completely head over heels in love with him. The thought terrified her. She took a deep breath and dropped her head down on to the vanity.

"There's my future Oscar winner! Well...maybe not Oscar...but..."

Addison recoiled at the sound of her mother's voice. She sat up straight and looked at her in the mirror. "Mom, you're not supposed to be back here...Intermission isn't that long."

"Oh relax, darling. I just wanted to give you a few pointers before the second half begins...Ew...black flowers? Who would send those..."

"Missy, leave the girl alone. She's doing a great job all on her own."

Addison smiled up at her Dad as he walked in.

"She could always do better, Dale. It's that type of attitude that's going to keep her from living up to her potential. I think I know a bit more about what it takes to make it as an actress."

"Dad...it's fine..." Addison said, trying to prevent them from arguing.

Missy's face lit up. "Okay, now when Pip…."

Addison tuned her out. She nodded occasionally and responded when appropriate, but she didn't hear a single thing that was said. It wasn't until her mother walked out of the room and her dad placed a hand on her shoulder that she came back to herself.

"You okay there, sweet-pea?"

"Huh?"

He pulled up a seat next to her. "You seem a bit checked out….It's almost like you'd rather be somewhere else? Like maybe across campus on a different stage?"

"What does it matter? I'm here. Playing a role that Mom won an Oscar for...She's thrilled."

"But you're not."

"And?"

"And, I learned a long time ago that the only person that makes your mother happy is your mother...What makes you happy?"

"Playing music."

"Is that all?"

She shook her head no. "Zed..." she whispered, holding the card up. "Daddy...I love him, and I've never been more scared of anything."

"Sweet-Pea, look at me...I know your mother and I haven't been the best relationship examples. But, it's okay to let yourself fall in love. Love is like oxygen. Love is a many splendored thing. Love lifts you up where we belong...All you need is love!"

She cracked a smile. "Really, Daddy? You're quoting Moulin Rouge?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "It may have been on tv last night and the music is excellent….but the point remains." He spun her chair around. "The greatest thing you could ever learn is how to love and be loved in return."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome...And as far as the Revue goes...You know, I'm pretty sure there's a backstage exit...you could probably still make it in time..."

Addison looked up and smiled. "Really? What about Mom?"

"You let me worry about that...I'll hold off your mother as long as possible. Do what makes you happy. Play your heart out, kid."

She threw her arms around his neck. "Thanks, Daddy. I love you."

"I love you too. Now go!"

She didn't need to be told again. She unhooked her microphone pack and handed it to him, "Make sure my understudy gets that!" she said before running towards the exit. She ran as fast as she could across campus to the music building. When she reached the auditorium she stopped for the briefest of seconds to catch her breath. She opened the heavy door and walked in just in time to see Zed take the stage.

The sound of the door closing echoed through the auditorium causing him to look up. His face lit up the moment their eyes met. He stepped up to the microphone. "I wrote this song for a girl who inspires and surprises me more and more every day...I adore you..." He started to strum his guitar.

"I'm just gonna stand with my bag hanging off my left arm  
I'm just gonna walk home kicking stones at parked cars  
But I had a great night, 'cause you kept rubbing against my arm  
I'm just gonna stand with my bag hanging off my left arm

Get me a drink, I get drunk off one sip, just so I can adore you  
I want the entire street out of town just so I can be alone with you  
Now go when you're ready  
My head's getting heavy, pressed against your arm  
I adore you

All of my money is spent on these nights, just so we can hang out  
Spacing in and out of your dresses, I wanna be found by you  
Found by you

Get me a drink, I get drunk off one sip, just so I can adore you  
I want the entire street out of town just so I can be alone with you  
Now go when you're ready  
My head's getting heavy, pressed against your arm  
I adore you, I adore you

She kicks the gutter in tight shorts, basketball courts  
Watch me, watch her talk to boys  
I'm known as a right-hand slugger  
Anybody else wanna touch my lover?..." he threw her a wink and smirked, making her smile.

"Get me a drink, I get drunk off one sip, just so I can adore you  
I want the entire street out of town just so I can be alone with you  
Now go when you're ready  
My head's getting heavy, pressed against your arm  
I adore you."

Addison hadn't even realized that her feet had been carrying her down the center aisle. As the crowded auditorium applauded she ran the rest of the way down and jumped onto the stage, throwing her arms around his neck.

"Oh my god, you left?!" he said as he scooped her up in a tight hug.

"I did!" she giggled frantically. "I'm done with it. I'm all in."

He ran his hand down the side of her cheek and kissed her, not pulling away until catcalls and murmurs started from the audience. "Oops," he smiled. "I forgot we have an audience...literally," he whispered.

She smiled up to him. "Can I borrow your guitar?"

He nodded and pulled the strap over his head, handing it to her. She took it from him and quickly tuned it to where she needed it. Turning towards the audience, she could see her mother running in from the back door with her father and Bree right on her heels. She stepped up to the microphone.

"Hi, I'm Addison. I'm a junior here at Seabrook and I know I wasn't listed in the program tonight, but I hope you don't mind if I sing a song I wrote." She glanced over to Zed and smiled as she took a deep breath and began to sing.

"When I was younger  
I saw my daddy cry  
And curse at the wind  
He broke his own heart  
And I watched  
As he tried to reassemble it

And my momma swore  
That she would never let herself forget  
And that was the day that I promised  
I'd never sing of love  
If it does not exist, but darlin'

You are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception

Maybe I know, somewhere  
Deep in my soul  
That love never lasts  
And we've got to find other ways  
To make it alone  
But keep a straight face

And I've always lived like this  
Keeping a comfortable, distance  
And up until now  
I had sworn to myself that I'm content  
With loneliness

Because none of it was ever worth the risk

But, you are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception

I've got a tight grip on reality  
But I can't let go of what's in front of me here  
I know you're leaving in the morning when you wake up  
Leave me with some kind of proof it's not a dream, oh

You are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception  
You are, the only exception

And I'm on my way to believing  
Oh, and I'm on my way to believing." She looked back over to Zed as she strummed out the final chord. He had his hand over his heart and blew her a kiss.

She leaned back in towards the microphone. "I love you, Zed Milo Jacobs."

The auditorium burst in applause, with Mason and Bree cheering the loudest. Zed walked up to her as she took a step away from the microphone. Taking her hands in his, he looked her in the eyes.

"Say it again..."

"I love you."

"I love you, too, Addison," he whispered closing the distance between them and kissing her.

"Go ahead and say it," she giggled against his lips. "I know you want to..."

He pulled back and smiled. "I told you so."

Addison couldn't help but laugh.

* * *

Zed smiled at the memory as Bonzo chuckled.

"I told you so?"

Zed shrugged. "I was eighteen...Maybe it wasn't the smoothest thing to say, but it got a good reaction out of her… The important thing is that she finally admitted that she loved me just as insanely as I loved her…and she shocked the hell out of me by admitting it in front of half the school and our friends and family...but, that was Addie...she never did anything small," he said with a large smile. "We were both so fucking happy that we didn't even care about the fallout that night would cause."

* * *

Zyla was the first person to reach the two of them as they walked off the stage. She wrapped them both up in her arms. "Those were two amazing performances!" she gushed as Zoey squeezed her way between them all to hug her brother. "And Addison, you dear sweet girl!" she said, kissing her cheek. "...Zevon isn't there something you'd like to add..."

"Oh, right...You did well tonight, son."

Zyla rolled her eyes at her husband. "Really, Zevon. That's the best you could do?"

Zed shook his head. "Mom, it's fine. Thanks, Pops...You know, I've been waiting for years to hear even the smallest bit of praise from you when it comes to my music...but I've realized something...I don't need your approval." He looked back to Addison and smiled.

Addison smiled, but before she could respond, Missy was grabbing her and pulling her away.

"What were you thinking?! I can't believe you just took off like that! You'll be lucky if you get a role as an understudy next year after this stunt!"

Addison dug her heels in, making her stop. "Mother, I'm done! I hate acting!"

"No you don't, you just don't like the hard work."

"I have no problem with hard work!"

"Missy! Enough! You don't master the number of instruments she has without hard work. Hard work has never been a problem for her. Will you listen to what she wants for once and not what you want?"

Addison looked over to her dad with wide eyes. He always avoided conflict with Missy. Dale met her eyes and smiled encouragingly.

"Mom...I'm focusing on music from now on. I know you're disappointed but I can't do it anymore." She looked over to Zed and smiled. "It's time I found my own voice and followed my heart."

Missy glared at her before turning to Zed. "You… This is all your fault!"

Addison walked over to him and held his hand.

"No, it's not Mother...I will not let you project your failures and mistakes on my relationship."

"He'll just break your heart, and you'll be left with nothing but regret...And now, you won't even have acting to fall back on!"

"I will never do that," Zed said as he squeezed Addison's hand reassuringly.

Addison pulled him down for a kiss, catching him off-guard. Before he could close his eyes he noticed Missy glaring at them. "We'll see about that..." she sneered walking off.

Everything in him felt the sudden urge to protect Addison from her. Addison loved him and trusted him despite having every reason in the world not to trust or love anyone. He wrapped his arms around her and closed his eyes, cherishing her even more.

"Okay...enough of that. There is a small child present, not to mention your parents." Zyla laughed as she hoisted Zoey up.

"I'm not that small, Momma!"

"What do you say we go and celebrate?" Dale suggested clapping them both on the shoulder.

"That's a great idea!" Zyla said, hugging her son's side. "I'm so proud of you!"

"Yes! Dinner on Daddy Dale!"

Dale rolled his eyes. "Aren't your parent's around, Mason?"

"Yup! But there was no way I was missing this!" He said hugging Addison. "I can't believe you finally stood up to the wicked witch!"

"Me either!" Bree smiled. "I'm so proud of you Adds!"

Dale just laughed. "Well, I guess we're all going out." He turned to look at Zevon. "Are you in?"

"I don't need your handouts… I can take my own family out."

"Zevon!" Zyla chastised.

"You know what...I have a long drive tomorrow," he said throwing up his hands and walking towards the exit.

Zyla looked over to Dale. "I'm sorry about him..."

Dale held his hands up and smiled. "It's fine… and my offer still stands."

She smiled and looked up to her son. "What do you say, Zeddy? In and Out Burgers? Caveman style?"

"Sounds perfect, Mom," he said hugging her back.

"Then what are we waiting for! Let's celebrate!" Dale exclaimed

As they all made their way towards the exit, Zed pulled Addison back into his arms. "I love you, Addison."

She looked up into his eyes, "I love you too, Zed… Forever."

"And after," he whispered as he bent down and captured her lips in a kiss.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****Almost finished with the flashbacks, I promise! So….is anyone reading this? Just curious. I haven't gotten much feedback and I can't improve the story without it...so… if you love it, hate it, or have ideas or crazy theories about it, let me know! All feedback is appreciated!**

**In other news, I'm sorry I haven't update Watch Us Shine in a while. I'm kind of hating everything I write these days and I don't want to short change that story. Bear with me, I promise a new chapter is in the works. **

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**Adore****\- Dean Lewis**

**The Only Exception****\- Paramore **


	9. Tequila

Chapter 9

**TEQUILA**

"And that was that. We were all in," Zed whispered with a wistful smile playing across his lips. "Junior prom was AMAZING, we were crowned king and queen and then had the best fucking party at her mom's house. And that summer…" he shook his head and smiled, "it was fucking fantastic. She came up to Seattle with me and I went to the Hamptons with her. It was just...It was the best. And then Senior year started… It was perfect. Adds was the first ever cheerleader to be named HBIC for a third year. She did that Brittany Song, 3. I'm still amazed she didn't get suspended for that performance...Have you ever listened to the words?"

"Can't say I have..." Bonzo smiled.

"Well, you should. Anyway, with her only enrolled in the music program, we had every class together. Everything was falling into place..."

...

* * *

**September **

"So…," Zed said as he sat down on the plush leather sofa next to Addison and draped his arm around her. "Spill the epic party deets for this weekend."

She groaned and cuddled into his chest. "My mom decided to have the yard re-landscaped while she's on location. I'm pretty sure she did that shit on purpose just so I wouldn't have a party….I mean, it's my birthday...I should be able to have a freakin' party if I want!"

"I told you, you could have one here Sweet-Pea," Dale said as he walked in from the kitchen with a large bowl of popcorn. "Incoming!" He called out, tossing a piece of popcorn across the room.

Zed tilted his head back and caught it in his mouth.

"Direct hit! Did you decide on a movie?" he asked handing the bowl to Addison.

"IT… and I told you, Daddy, I don't trust any of my friends to not drown in the Pacific if we had it here. It's bad enough with just the pool at mom's."

Dale let out a chuckle. "Fair enough...and if we're watching IT, I'm going to nope right out," he shuddered. "I fully support your decision to love scary movies, but I draw the line at killer clowns."

"Weenie..." Addison teased, throwing a handful of popcorn at him playfully.

He caught a piece in his mouth mid-air and smiled. "You know it… You two enjoy." As he turned to walk towards the stairs he stopped. "What about Aspen?"

Addison sat up and looked over the back of the couch. "What about it?"

"How about a weekend in Aspen for your birthday with a few of your friends? The remodel is finished."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah… I can send the jet back from New York after I land Friday morning, you guys could fly over to Aspen after school and come back Sunday night… I'll even let Mason fly on the jet unsupervised… though I will have to give Nancy a heads up not to let him have any sugar..."

She jumped off the sofa and ran over to him, throwing her arms around him. "Really?"

"Really… I don't need him swinging from the overhead compartments."

Addison giggled. "Thank you, Daddy!"

Dale hugged her tight. "You're welcome, Sweet-Pea… enjoy your creepy clown movie."

"I will!" She hugged him again and ran back over to the couch.

"So...Aspen?" Zed asked as she curled back into him.

Addison nodded happily. "Think you and Mase can both call off of work all weekend?"

"Shouldn't be an issue. We already took off Sunday for fear of hangovers. Owen and Wes can handle it… Only one problem..."

"What's that?"

"Um… I don't know how to ski."

"Not an issue. There's no snow right now."

"Oh…" Zed sat quietly and ran his fingers through her long blonde hair as she started the movie. As the opening credits started he spoke up again. "If there's no snow why Aspen?"

Addison let out a soft laugh as she sat up and straddled his lap. "Because, snow or no snow, it's still the playground of the rich and famous, and we can do whatever we want without worrying about being caught on camera, or having the police called, or pesky little things like minimum age limits, oh… and pot is legal," she said in between kisses and nips. "And I know it goes against everything I stand for, and I know it sounds elitist or whatever to say 'I'm going to fly my fuck hot boyfriend and two closest friends on my private jet to my house in Aspen for my birthday, but..." she smiled and shrugged. "It's my 18th birthday and both of my parents are working. So I'm going to allow myself to overindulge for one hedonistic weekend that none of us will ever forget," she whispered as she bit his ear. She ran her tongue along the outside of his ear, "You know...with IT playing there's not a chance in hell my Dad is coming back downstairs for at least a couple hours..."

Zed smiled and caught her lips in a kiss as he laid them down onto the couch.

* * *

"Seriously though," Bree said as they walked across the tarmac of ASE, "We should go all out and get ridiculously dressed up and go out and dance like idiots somewhere… At least one night…"

"I was kind of hoping I wouldn't have to leave the house," Addison said, trying to keep a straight face.

"Adds, I love you girl, but I don't want to spend the entire weekend covering my eyes as I walk into a room for fear of seeing you and Zed defile every flat surface in the house."

"Who says we need a flat surface?" Zed teased as he draped his arms around them both and smacked a loud kiss on Addison's cheek making her giggle.

"We can drink and smoke and you two can have sex all the rest of the time. But we NEED to go shopping and go out tomorrow night!"

Addison let out an exaggerated sigh. "I guess..." she glanced at Bree and started to laugh. "We already have reservations for dinner tomorrow night, and we're on the VIP list at the club. Did you really think I'd fly us all out just to stay cooped up?"

Mason whistled low as they approached a navy blue car with a driver holding a sign that read "Donnelly". "Daddy Dale came through with the Rolls!" he said dropping his bag and walking around the Rolls Royce. He looked over to the driver. "Is this ours all weekend?"

Addison bit her lip and smiled. "Yeah, Mase… It's ours...Well I mean, technically it was my grandfathers, but..." she shrugged. "Hi Niles, it's good to see you."

"Always a pleasure Ms. Donnelly," the older man said as he took her bags and placed them in the trunk for her.

"Niles?" Zed asked quietly next to her.

Addison shrugged again. "He's been the family driver in Aspen since before I was born...Want to make out in the back of a Rolls Royce?" she whispered with a giggle.

"When do I not want to make out with you?" he smiled down to her as Niles opened the car door for them to enter.

As they drove through the center of Aspen, Zed's eyes grew large as he took in the sleepy town. There were plenty of chalets, fun colored houses, and designer shops all flaunting the affluence of the elite that vacationed there. He quietly started humming a tune.

Addison cracked a smile when she recognized what he had been humming.

"What?" he asked with a large smile.

"Lifestyles of the rich and famous..." she sang before breaking out in a fit of giggles.

Zed shrugged his shoulders. "Seemed fitting."

They drove out of town and up the other side of the valley. The higher they went, the more excited Addison became.

"I hope you like the house," she whispered quietly as they rounded a bend on the mountain road. "We're here!"

Niles slowed and turned down the long stone gateway, heading down the drive before finally pulling up outside an impressive dark wood and stone house.

"Nice digs, Adds," Mason said as he opened the front door to the car and stepped out into the cool evening air.

"Thanks… some of Bamms! best records were recorded here," she said, the reverence clear in her voice as she looked up at the house.

"There's a recording studio here too?" Zed asked as he walked to the trunk to help Niles with the bags.

"All of the Donnelly houses have recording studios," Mason laughed. "Well, except for Missy's… does she even still count as a Donnelly?"

"You have four recording studios?!"

Addison shook her head. "Nine."

He dropped the bag he had just picked up in shock. "Nine?"

"Yeah, Malibu, New York, the Hamptons, Aspen...which are the ones you've been to...or you know, just pulled up in front of... But then we also have one in the Maui house, the Miami house, the New Orleans house, one in Jamaica, and of course the big studio in downtown LA… and those are just my Dad's personal ones. Bamm! has a bunch more available for their other producers."

Mason walked over to Zed and clapped him on the back. "You get used to it eventually."

"No, you don't!" Bree giggled. "But enough about that. I'm freezing! Let's go inside."

Addison unlocked the door and walked in, flipping lights on as she went.

"If you need anything, Ms. Donnelly, I'll be just next door. Enjoy your weekend," Niles stated as he set the bags down in the entrance way.

"Thank you, Niles," she smiled politely.

"You're quite welcome...Oh, and happy birthday," he said as he closed the door behind him.

Addison looked around and smiled. "This is going to be the best weekend ever!"

* * *

Bonzo grabbed the bottle of Jack from in between them and poured another shot for himself. "You know I'm kind of hating you right now. If I didn't know that this story doesn't have a happy ending, I'd definitely hate you… Fucking weekend trip to Aspen… Lucky bastard."

"So should I not tell you about Spring Break in Cabo or our Summer trips to Hawaii and Greece?"

"I officially fucking hate you..." he knocked back the shot he had poured and slammed the empty glass down onto the table. "But at this point, I'm pretty invested, so please...continue..." He belched and waved a hand for Zed to proceed with the story.

Zed exhaled loudly. "Trust me, I get it… but like you said, you know it all came crashing down at some point..." He poured himself another shot, starring at the dark amber liquid as it

settled in the small glass.

"Don't get all emo on me now… Her birthday, weekend in Aspen..." Bonzo urged him on.

Zed took the shot in his hand. "We stayed in that first night. Smoked and drank and jam sessioned all night in front of the fireplace, laughing about stupid shit until Bree went to bed and Mason passed out on the couch… Then we went back to the master suite and..." he cracked a sad smile at the memory. "Well, let's just say that fireplaces and bear skin rugs are everything the movies make them out to be and more."

"Fucking. Hate. You."

Zed shrugged his shoulders and pulled out his dog-tags from under his shirt. His fingers grabbed an oval locket hanging on the chain. "I gave her this that weekend."

"The infamous locket… you got in so much trouble for having that picture with you in basic." Bonzo chuckled at the memory of Zed being on mess hall duty for a solid month.

"Yeah… Couldn't part with it then… still can't… As drunk as I was when I gave it to her, I still remember it perfectly." He ran a finger over their engraved initials on the front before opening it, revealing a picture of the two of them, obviously drunk and obviously in love. "Bree snapped this picture that Saturday night while we were at this private club." He shook his head and chuckled at the memory. "Adds and Bree went all fucking out. I'm talking sky high Manolo's, dresses that could pass for risque lingerie… my god did she look fucking hot as hell that night..." he subtly shifted in his seat, readjusting the sudden tightening in his pants. "Fucking tequila..."

* * *

"Oh no, you don't!" Addison said as she took his beer from him. "My birthday, I'm picking the drinks!"

"More champagne?" He asked, wrapping his arms around her waist. "I have to say, the crystale at dinner was pretty damn good."

Addison threw her head back and laughed. "It better have been! And no..." she handed him a shot glass, "We will not be drinking champagne."

"Really? We're going to shoot tequila?"

She nodded excitedly and smiled. "Maybe if you're good I'll let you take a body shot..."

Zed laughed and leaned down to steal a kiss. "And what would constitute being good?"

"Kiss me..."

He smiled and pulled her in even closer. "Such a chore," he teased, closing the distance between them and kissing her.

Addison pulled back and grabbed a lime from a plate on the center of the table. She held his gaze as she rubbed the lime across her collarbone and then sprinkled a small amount of salt. "Lick..."

Zed did as he was instructed, flattening his tongue against her collarbone.

"Now drink..." she whispered into his ear. Zed grabbed the glass and drank the light golden liquid, cringing as it passed down his throat. "Oh, that's terrible."

"Kiss me again..." she giggled, popping a small piece of lime into her mouth just before he attacked her lips.

"Mmm...much better..."

"Stop making out for five seconds so I can take your god damn picture!" Bree hollered over the music.

They pulled apart and Addison sat on Zed's lap hugging him tight as they hammed it up for the camera.

"Thank you! Now you can continue," Bree laughed grabbing a shot before dancing off.

"I have no idea how you drink this shit on the regular," Zed laughed as he watched Addison pour another round.

"Think you can keep up?" She asked with a grin playing on her lips.

He smirked and ran his hand up her bare thigh. "Is that a challenge?"

"Maybe… or maybe I'm just trying to get you drunk so that I can have my wicked way with you," she smiled sweetly.

"Gorgeous, you can always have your wicked way with me," he laughed. "Besides, you weigh 1-0-nothing… I don't think it'll be a problem keeping up with you."

* * *

"Oh, you young idiot," Bonzo laughed.

"Yeah… I was wasted a few shots in… But, Addie was still going strong. At one point she was even dancing on top of the bar drinking straight out the bottle. It was fucking wild… I swear I thought I was going to end up arrested that night. She always did have quite the habit of attracting attention, but drunk Addison dancing on a bar in a glorified negligee… yeah… Mason kept me from throwing a few punches that night." His fingers rubbed the locket again.

* * *

"Zed… you're too heavy for me to carry," Addison laughed as they stumbled out of the car in front of the house. "Mason! A little help?!"

Mason laughed as he stumbled towards them, dragging Bree with him. "Yeah, I got his other arm… I'm so making you drink Vodka on my birthday…Fucking tequila..."

"Um, I don't think so," she giggled. "And I didn't hear you complaining while you were making out with that cougar on the dance floor."

"...Fucking tequila."

"You know I can walk," Zed slurred out.

"Rightttttttt….." Bree giggled next to them. "I said the same thing before I fell down outside in the parking lot!… Fucking tequila."

"That's because you're wrecked, Bree!" Addison laughed. "I told you that the altitude can mess with your tolerance.

"You didn't tell me that!" Zed chuckled as he swayed between her and Mason.

"That's because she loves me more!"

"I love you both," Addison said, trying to root around in her purse for the keys.

"What about me?" Mason pouted as he shifted Zed.

"I love you all."

"Me more though," Zed said holding his head up for a moment before dropping it back down.

"Shhh… need… keys..." Addison smiled victoriously as she found them, fumbling a few times before she finally got the door to unlock. She bent down and undid her sky-high heels tossing them inside before helping Mason with Zed and Bree.

Zed was sitting on the edge of the oversized bed when Addison stumbled in and sat down next to him.

"Baby, drink this...and you may want to take these as well," she whispered handing him a bottle of water and two pain relievers.

"Thank you, Gorgeous… I love you."

"I love you too."

"Forever."

"And after."

He leaned over and ran his nose along her jaw. "I want you..."

"You have me," she whispered.

"I want to be inside of you."

"I think we can arrange that," she smiled. She stood back up, swaying as she did. "Woah… not going to make it to my bag for a condom..." she giggled. "Looks like you're going to have to wait until one of us is a little more soberer… or until the room stops spinning."

"Fucking tequila..." he laughed. "Wait! Jacket pocket!" he pointed to the ground next to the bed.

"I think I can make it that far..." she wobbled a few steps and reached down, picking up his jacket and searching the pockets. "Look at us! Still being all responsible..." she giggled. "Wait...What's this?" she asked pulling out a Tiffany's box.

"Your birthday present...wanted to give it to you tonight."

"Z… I told you not to get me anything."

"I told you the same thing and yet now I own a Les Paul," he chuckled.

"You love that guitar and you know it!"

"I do...but I love you more...now open the damn box."

Cautiously she undid the white satin bow. She slowly opened the lid and pulled out the blue bag inside. She loosened the pouch and turned it over. A beautiful platinum oval locket fell into her palm. "Z..."

"Do you like it?"

Her finger traced the delicate "A+Z" engraving on the front. "It's beautiful..." She launched herself back onto the bed and straddled him, kissing him roughly. "I love it! Thank you, Baby!" She grabbed his shirt and ripped it open, giggling as the buttons popped off.

"You're welcome," he breathed against her skin as he reached the hem of her dress and pulled it up and off of her. "Condom?"

"Shit!" she giggled falling off of his lap onto the mattress. Her head dangled upside down off the bed as she reached up and grabbed his jacket from the floor. A loud moan escaped her mouth as he started to lick up the inside of her leg. She doubled her searching efforts while she still held a feeble shred of sanity. "Yes!" she cried out as she finally pulled out a metallic foil packet from his inside pocket.

* * *

"Not the most romantic moment we had, but… it was completely us," he laughed tucking the locket back under his shirt. "I eventually got around to actually putting the necklace on her the next day. She never took it off. Shower, pool, sleep...The necklace stayed on." He grabbed the bottle of Jack and poured another round.

* * *

**October**

Zed popped a piece of juicy fruit into his mouth and smoothed down his hair as he waited for someone to answer the door.

"Zed, good to see you, son!" Dale said as he opened the front door. "Gomez?" He asked, taking in Zed's outfit. "That's an unexpected surprise."

Zed smiled politely. "Yes, Sir. Bree banned us from dressing up as any character from Nightmare Before Christmas for her Halloween party this year."

"Zed, for the hundredth time, call me Dale," he chuckled.

"Sorry, Dale."

Dale waved him off. "Come on in. I haven't seen Addie since breakfast. She's been in the studio all damn day"

"She has?"

"Yeah...I'm not even allowed on the second floor right now… Like I don't have work I need to be doing in my office!" he laughed.

Zed shook his head and smiled. "Is there any chance at all she's dressed and ready?"

"Not even a little," he chuckled.

Zed just smiled more. "Thanks." He quickly climbed the stairs up to the second-floor studio. When he walked in he saw Addison in the sound booth with headphones on playing the violin, still dressed in her black satin boy shorts and tank pajamas. He sat down on one of the plush couches and watched her. She was always gorgeous, but when she lost herself in music she was breathtaking.

A few minutes later she took off the headphones and set the violin down before walking back into the control room. "Z!" she ran over and jumped into his arms, kissing him. "Juicy fruit?"

Zed shrugged. "I told you I'd try

to cut back on the cigarettes."

She smiled and kissed him again. "You taste delicious… but then again, you always do. How long have you been sitting in here?"

"Just a few minutes."

"Do I want to know what time it is?"

He laughed and held up his watch for her to read.

Addison gasped. "Oh my God...I completely lost track of time. I just had this thing I was trying to work on and then it just started to flow and..." she took a deep breath and smiled. "And I'm so close to being finished...Do you think anyone will care if we're a teensy bit late? I really want to wrap this up."

"I'm sure no one will even notice," he said kissing her. "So, what are you working on?"

Her face broke out in a large smile as she hopped off his lap and walked over to the soundboard, sitting down and adjusting a few controls.

"God, do you look sexy behind a deck," Zed whispered as he walked up behind her. He brushed her hair away from her neck and leaned down, placing soft kisses along her jaw.

Addison smiled and rolled her eyes. "Go sit on the couch before I get distracted and end up jumping your bones instead of working."

"I'm fine being even later for the party!"

She laughed and pushed him away playfully. "Don't tempt me, Trouble...Give me ten minutes to layer in the violin track and then you can hear it."

"Oh, alright..." he pretended to pout before picking up her arm and placing kisses down it.

Addison giggled, "I'm serious! Don't go all Gomez Adams on me yet!"

He kissed her cheek loudly and walked back over to the couch to let her work. As she mixed in the violins, Zed texted Mason and Bree letting them know they would be running late.

"And...done!" Addison called out just a couple minutes later.

"Already?"

She nodded and smiled as she pressed the playback button.

"Mmm Mmm Mmm  
Don't blame me, love made me crazy  
If it doesn't, you ain't doing it right  
Lord, save me, my drug is my baby  
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life

I've been breakin' hearts a long time, and  
Toyin' with them older guys  
Just to play things for me to use  
Something happened for the first time, in  
The darkest little paradise  
Shakin, pacin', I just need you

For you, I would cross the line  
I would waste my time  
I would lose my mind  
They say she's gone too far this time

Don't blame me, love made me crazy  
If it doesn't, you ain't doing it right  
Lord, save me, my drug is my baby  
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life  
Don't blame me, love made me crazy  
If it doesn't, you ain't doing it right  
Oh, Lord, save me, my drug is my baby  
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life

I get so high, oh  
Every time, yeah, every time you're lovin' me  
You're lovin' me  
Trip of my life, oh  
Every time, yeah, every time you're touchin' me  
You're touchin' me

Every time, yeah, every time you're lovin' me  
Oh Lord, save me, my drug is my baby  
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life  
Usin' for the rest of my life, oh!"

As the music faded, she looked back over towards Zed to get his reaction.

"Oh my God…." he whispered. "Adds….did you do all of that? Words, music...everything?"

She nodded her head and smiled.

"Holy shit! It's amazing!"

"Really?!"

"Yes! I don't think your dad could have done better! That was..." he was at a loss for words. He pulled her to him and kissed her as hard as he could. "You're incredible."

Addison giggled and kissed him again.

"What's it for?"

"That...is a secret," she whispered as she threw him a wink and stood up. "Come on Gomez, I need to go get Morticiad up."

* * *

**NOVEMBER**

"Will you stop fidgeting!" Addison snapped as Zed climbed the steps behind her. "It's just my dad! You've met him like, a hundred times. You've been on multiple trips with us. You're over here for Thanksgiving dinner for Christ sake!"

Zed ran his hands nervously through his hair. "Yeah, but this is different! I don't want him thinking I'm using you."

Addison spun around and looked down to him from the higher step. "Stop it. My Dad is not my mother or your father. He doesn't think that about you, and more importantly, I know that it's not true," she ran her hand down his face and bent down to kiss him. When she pulled back, she smiled and wiped her lip gloss off of his lips with her thumb. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Baby."

"Now just go in there, and be your typical cocky, charming self. Got it!"

"You make it sound so easy, Gorgeous."

"Because it is, Handsome. Come on," she grabbed his hand and pulled him up the rest of the steps and to her fathers home office.

When they reached the door, Zed stopped her from knocking. "I don't think I can do this."

Addison rolled her eyes in frustration and opened the door. "Hi, Daddy," she smiled sweetly.

"Hey there Sweet-pea. Is dinner ready?"

"Not yet. We're actually up here because Zed needs to ask you something but he's chickening out."

"Thanks, Adds..." Zed mumbled under his breath as he walked in. Dale's office was always awe-inspiring with his numerous Grammy's, Gold and Platinum albums, and various other music awards lining the walls. Zed tried to ignore them today though.

Dale laughed. "Relax, Zed. Unless you're asking for my daughter's hand in marriage, I think you're safe."

"Daddy!"

"I'm just fucking with you," he said with a laugh. "Unless you are..." he said looking over to Zed.

Addison rolled her eyes. "Ugh… Why are the men in my life dead set on driving me crazy today?! Daddy, Zed needs a letter of recommendation to accompany his application to Julliard. Can you help him out?"

"So you're really going to go the Julliard route instead of interning for me."

"Sorry," Zed said politely with a chuckle. "Julliard has always been the dream."

Dale nodded his head. "Well, I think it's a fantastic dream. I also think Julliard would be lucky to have you. I'll type something up."

"Really? I mean, thank you, sir!"

"Zed, for the hundredth time..."

"I know, I know..." he laughed. "Thank you, Dale."

"You're welcome. Let me know if you need any help with your audition piece."

"I will, Thank you!"

"Thanks, Daddy," Addison said as she ran around to the other side of his desk to give him a hug. "Dinner should be ready in about an hour."

"You're welcome, sweet-pea. And make sure Mason doesn't eat all the pumpkin pie before dinner this year!"

"What do you think I've been trying to do all day!"

* * *

**DECEMBER**

"Hey there, Gorgeous," Zed said as Addison walked into the record store. "You are looking especially delicious on this cold afternoon."

"Hi, Handsome," she smiled walking over to the counter and kissing him. "Well...I'm here...is there a reason you asked me to stop in? Not that I mind..."

"I don't know. Is there a reason my mom would have dropped off a piece of mail to me here at work addressed to a Meg Jacobs and asked me to make sure you receive it?"

"OH. MY. GOD! ZED! GIVE IT TO ME!"

"You know, usually you wait until we're naked before you yell that..." he said throwing her a wink. He held up the envelope in question and smiled. "Meg Jacobs?"

"Oh, shut up. I couldn't use Addison or Donnelly or any combination thereof, so I swiped your last name. Get over it, AND GIVE ME THE ENVELOPE!"

He shook his head and held it up higher in the air out of her reach. "Can I get a please?"

She smiled sweetly. "Please give me the envelope or I'm going to low kick you."

He laughed and bent down to kiss her cheek. "You're so hot when you're angry."

"I'm always hot."

"I love you."

"I love you too...Now give me the fucking envelope...please."

He smiled as he handed her the envelope, watching as she tore into it and read it as quickly as possible. She sharply inhaled and dropped down to her knees, tears started to stream from her eyes.

"Addie!" he jumped over the counter and wrapped her up in a hug. "What's wrong?"

She silently handed him the letter.

He looked it over. "It's from Bamm! Records….Dear Miss Jacobs… blah blah blah...HOLY SHIT! You submitted a demo under a fake name?!"

She nodded her head. He continued reading. "OH MY GOD! ADDISON!" he picked her up and swung her around, kissing her deeply. "Congratulations!" He backed her up against the wall and continued to kiss her. "I'm so proud of you, baby!"

"What is all the commotion?" Mason asked coming out of the back room. "God, get a room you two! It's bad enough I can never go back onto the roof after last month..."

Zed pulled away just enough to yell, "Adds just landed a record deal!"

"WOOOOOH! YES!" Mason exclaimed running over and hugging her around Zed. "Oh god is this a weird hug...Zed? Can you put her down so I can actually hug her?"

Zed laughed and set Addison back down on her feet. Mason pulled her into him. "Try not to forget us, little people, when you're a star."

"You know I could never forget you," she said hugging him back.

"What did Daddy Dale say?"

"Nothing yet! I literally just found out!"

"When are you planning on telling him?" Zed asked, draping his arms around them both.

"Christmas Eve, I guess… If I tell my dad before I tell my mom, she'll go nuclear. But, I don't really want to tell my mom at all...So… Christmas Eve dinner makes the most sense. They'll both be there."

"Oh to be a fly on the wall for that one," Mason laughed. "Z, you've got to record Missy's meltdown for me!"

* * *

Zed held up the nearly empty bottle of Jack and shrugged, opting to drink straight from the bottle instead of pouring another shot.

"She had a contract?"

"Yeah," Zed replied, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "And that was before the label executives met with her and realized who she actually was..." he let out a laugh. "Christmas Eve was hilarious…. You have to understand… Christmas Eve dinner was a formal affair, I'm talking black

tie, catered, the whole nine yards. It was long and awkward, and I don't think anyone said more than five words during the entire meal. Addison waited until after dessert was served to tell them..."

* * *

Addison pushed herself away from the table and stood up, smoothing her emerald green dress down. "Daddy… Mother… I have some news..."

"Oh dear lord, you're pregnant," Missy said in horror. She turned towards Zed angrily.

"God, no!" Addison exclaimed in shock.

"You're engaged?" Dale asked hopefully.

"Really, Daddy?! First off, I'm eighteen...Secondly, everyone, including Zed, knows my stance on marriage… It's a hard no." She shook her head in frustration, pinching the bridge of her nose. "What is wrong with you two..." she mumbled under her breath.

Zed couldn't help but laugh. She turned and narrowed her eyes at him. "Not. Funny. Z."

"It's a little funny..."

She cracked a small smile and rolled her eyes. "Anyway… No, I am not pregnant, and no, I am not getting married..." she held up the letter. "I wanted to tell you that..." she took a deep breath and smiled. "I submitted a demo under a fake name and… I was offered a deal!"

The table was silent for a beat before both of her parents reacted at the same time.

"YESS!"

"Oh, is that all..."

Dale rushed around the table and hugged her as tight as he could. "Can I?" he asked, motioning to the letter in her hand.

She nodded and smiled.

"Dear Ms. Jacobs...Jacobs?" He asked with an arched brow and a knowing smirk.

"Shut up, Daddy… It'll never be anything but Donnelly...get over it."

He shrugged and kept reading. When he finished, he set it down and hugged her again.

"Addie...I'm so proud of you, Sweet-pea. But you know you didn't have to go through all this," he smirked holding up the letter.

"Daddy, I've told you...I don't want anything handed to me. I want to earn it...Poppa didn't make it easy for you just because he owned the label..."

"No, he didn't...but I also wasn't as good as you," he said with a wink. "Well, you've definitely earned this, all on your own. Your Poppa would be proud of you too. This is...This is just about the best Christmas present ever!"

"Good, because I didn't get you anything else," Addison giggled.

"I'll never understand it," Missy mumbled. "What's the point of being a Donnelly if you can't use it to your advantage?"

"Is that why you've kept the name all this time?" Addison shot back.

"Addison..." Dale warned.

Addison just shrugged and smiled sweetly, ignoring her mother's glare.

"Can I hear your demo?" Dale asked.

"Must we?"

"Melissa, would it kill you to show some support for your daughter."

"I have shown her lots of support. She had the best acting coach, the best vocal coach, the best dance teachers…

"All of which I hated."

"All of which I paid for and you so carelessly threw away!"

As they continued to bicker Zed dug out his phone. He set it on the table and pressed play. The sound of Addison's voice filled the room, making both of her parents stop.

Dale sat back down in his seat, listening carefully.

Zed couldn't be sure due to the recent botox injections, but even Missy seemed to be moved.

Addison watched her parents intently. When the song came to an end everyone was silent.

"Well..." she whispered.

Missy stood up from the table and walked out.

Addison tried to hide how hurt she was, but her voice gave her away. "Daddy?"

Dale looked over to her with tears in his eyes. "Addison… I have never been more proud of you in my entire life."

* * *

Zed stood up from the table. "I need some fresh air. Want another bottle?"

Bonzo pulled out his wallet. "Bucky will kill us if we're too smashed to rehearse tomorrow. I'll take care of the tab...you have more than provided entertainment tonight."

"And I'm not even finished," Zed smirked. "I'll meet you outside."

"Sounds good man."

Zed walked out of the bar and into the cool night air. He propped himself against the wall and took his dog tags back out. He flipped the locket open and looked at the picture again. It was something he did way more often than he would ever admit to anyone, himself included. He closed his eyes as a long forgotten melody raced through his mind. He wrote it after another drunken night as he sat staring at the picture. The lyrics quietly fell from his lips.

"I can still shut down a party  
I can hang with anybody  
I can drink whiskey and red wine  
Champagne all night  
Little scotch on the rocks and I'm fine, I'm fine

But when I taste tequila, baby I still see ya…  
Sky high in Colorado, your lips pressed against the bottle  
Swearing on a bible, baby, I'd never leave ya  
I remember how bad I need ya when I taste tequila..."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I'm sorry updates have been so sporadic lately! But, I'm back from vacation and attempting to get back onto a writing schedule. I was originally planning for this chapter to be the last flashback, but it got REALLLLLLY long, so I split it. Second part will be posted next week! **


	10. Stoned On You

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

**Chapter 10**

**STONED ON YOU**

"All paid up," Bonzo said as he walked out the door.

Zed startled, quickly closing the locket and shoving his dog-tags back inside his shirt.

"You alright man?"

"Yeah..." he said hesitantly, pushing himself off the wall. "Just kind of a shock to the system to be talking about this shit after so many years."

Bonzo nodded sympathetically as they started to walk.

"Where was I?"

"Christmas."

"Oh yeah… I spent Christmas break working on my audition piece for the Julliard auditions. Adds was pissed because I wouldn't let her listen to it, no matter how many times she tried to *ahem... persuade me… We actually fought a lot around that time… But only in bed…" he clarified. "She was at her mom's and Missy was making her life hell, constantly making veiled threats to call a board meeting with the Bamm! executives… I will say this… Angry sex with Addison was on a whole new level… Hair would be pulled harder, bites went deeper… we'd tear the sheets, throw the pillows out… we even broke her brass bed."

"Damn..."

Zed smiled and shrugged his shoulders. "I was a very lucky man… But yeah...When the day of my audition finally came, I was a fucking nervous wreck…"

* * *

**January**

Zed paced nervously back and forth in front of the auditorium doors, singing his audition piece on a constant loop in his head.

"Hey...you okay?"

He jumped at the sound of her voice. "Jesus, Adds...you scared me half to death."

"Really? I was calling your name...wait..." she gently kissed him. "Zed Milo Jacobs...are you nervous?"

"What? Me? Nervous? Pshhh..."

Addison arched her brow and smirked until he gave in.

"Fine...maybe a little," he sighed as he ran his hand through his thick hair, causing it to stand up even more than normal.

"Awww… Baby…." she looked around the hallway before grabbing his hand and pulling him into a nearby rehearsal room. She left the door cracked open so that they would be able to hear his name being called. Before Zed could ask her what she was doing, she pulled him down to her and kissed him.

"Adds…."

"Shh… We only have a few minutes," she whispered, undoing his Gucci belt and dropping down to her knees.

His harsh gasp echoed through the room as Addison reached for the button and zipper of his jeans, groaning as her fingertips brushed over his hardness.

"Addison..."

With a quickness that surprised him, she had his pants undone and along with his boxers, pushed to the ground in seconds. Taking a moment to look up into his eyes, she smiled and licked her lips. Never breaking their gaze, she allowed the tip of her tongue to run from the base to the tip of his arousal, swirling it around to catch the droplets of moisture that dotted the crown.

Zed clenched his hands into fists, the feel of her tongue stroking him, nearly too much to handle. His hands slowly unclenched and he buried them in her hair, gently guiding her head as she took him deeper.

Addison hummed against him as she wrapped her lips fully around his shaft, using her hand to move in tandem with her lips, his low moans and growls turning her on as she grew wetter between her thighs, but this wasn't about her. This was to help Zed relax before his audition. She relaxed her throat and took him in even deeper.

Zed could feel himself building to a peak, the sensations overwhelming him. "Oh God, Adds..." he whispered hoarsely. "If you don't stop now..."

She looked up at him and winked as she pulled him into her throat as deep as he would go.

He let out a string of curses and grabbed onto the back of her head, emptying himself into her mouth with a final hard thrust.

Addison swallowed every drop, licking her lips as she looked up at him and smiled. "Still nervous?" she asked, wiping her bottom lip with her thumb.

Zed chuckled and pulled his pants back up. "That...was a hell of a distraction," he said as he pulled her up to her feet and crashed his lips against hers. Their combined tastes making his head swim. "Turnabout is fair play," he whispered, running his hand up her skirt, brushing against her hot center.

"Zed Jacobs..." The sound of his name being called from the hallway caught their attention.

"Later..." she said kissing him. "Right now, you need to go be a rock god."

"I love you so fucking much."

"Zed Jacobs?"

Addison giggled. "I love you too...Now go!"

He kissed her roughly before sprinting out the room towards the audition hall.

A few moments later Zed was standing on stage in front of the panel of Julliard admission officials that would decide his future. He took a deep shaky breath and wiped his sweaty palms down the front of his jeans as he stepped up to the microphone.

"Name, and concentration..." One of the male admission officials called out.

"Um, Zed Jacobs, musical composition, guitar, and vocals..." he said quietly.

Addison was seated in the back of the theater, sandwiched between her father and Zed's mother, Zyla. "He's still nervous..." Addison whispered. Without thinking, she stood up on the seat. "WOOOOOO! GO ZED!"

Zed looked up and squinted through the bright lights. He smiled when he caught a glimpse of her before her dad and his mom pulled her back down to sit.

"I'd like to remind all those in the audience to remain silent...Now, if there are no further interruptions, Mr. Jacobs...please proceed with your audition piece."

Zed nodded his head. "I'll be playing an original composition for you today." He picked up his guitar and took a deep breath.

"We're making this part of us together  
You're taking my mind off, of the pressure  
I'm gone with the wind, high like a feather  
Your love is like codeine

Girl, I get stoned on you  
Rubbing my bones on you  
Nothing else burns like you  
Ripping my shirt off you

There's something about the way you shiver  
Even in the morning  
Girl, I get stoned  
And I'll take a bullet for you right now  
Just to keep you in my lungs

Girl, I get stoned on you  
Rubbing my bones on you  
Nothing else burns like you (oh)  
Ripping my shirt off you (oh yeah)

My fingertips  
On your lips  
Are racing hands  
Down your hips

Girl, I get stoned on you  
Rubbing my bones on you (yeah)  
Nothing else burns like you do (no)  
Oh Lord, I get stoned on you, oh  
Stoned!

Girl, I get stoned on you  
Rubbing my bones on you (rubbing my bones one you, oh)  
Nothing else burns like you (nothing ever burns like you)  
Ripping my shirt off you

Oh, you get me so stoned  
Out of my mind  
Out of my mind  
Out of my mind…"

His fingers stilled as he took another deep breath and looked out into the seats, past the admissions panel, to where Addison was. It was at that moment that he realized he didn't need to go to Julliard to make his dreams come true. As long as he had Addison, he had everything.

"Thank you, Mr. Jacobs. You'll be hearing our decision sometime in the next month."

Zed nodded his head and walked off the stage. The moment he walked back into the hallway, his arms were full of a very amorous, Addison.

"That. Was. The. Most. Amazing. Wonderful. Spectacular…." she said in between frantic kisses. "Your voice was just… And that bridge! Oh, god was that sexy!"

Zed smiled and grabbed her face. "It's a disaster how much I love you..."

"I know exactly what you mean… I love you, too… so much..." she kissed him roughly, moaning as he lifted her up by her backside.

"Enough of that, you two… no parent wants to see any part of all that," Zyla teased as she and Dale walked down the hall towards them.

Zed rested his forehead against Addison's and let out a ragged breath. He placed a quick kiss against her lips and set her back down on her feet. His arm was wrapped around her waist tightly, refusing to let any more distance than absolutely necessary come between them.

"That was a fantastic performance!" Dale said clapping him on the shoulder. "I probably could have gone without hearing about my daughter in that way...but, it was a damn good song none the less."

"Thank you, Dale….What can I say…" he glanced down to Addison and smiled. "She's my Pattie Boyd."

"Who?" his mom asked, squeezing in for a hug.

Dale let out a soft laugh. "The woman that launched a thousand songs."

Zed hugged her and kissed her cheek. "Really Mom? Pattie Boyd inspired basically every song Clapton wrote and before that several of the Beatles best songs."

"Spoken like a true music nerd, Zeddy," she laughed hugging him even tighter. "I'm so proud of you!"

"Thanks, Mom."

"We need to celebrate!"

"Ma, I don't even know if I got in."

"Oh please," Addison said with an exaggerated eye roll. "If they don't accept you after that, then they're idiots that don't deserve you."

Dale laughed. "She's got a point, Zed. But, if by some chance you don't get in, I'd be more than happy to help you produce a demo to send off."

"Thank you, but I think I'd have Adds help me out," he said as she rested her head against his chest.

"I don't blame you, son. She's well on her way to surpassing my skills… I'm proud of both of you." He clapped his hands together. "What do you say we go grab some food? Chateau Marmont?"

"I've always wanted to go there!" Zyla said with a large smile.

"That sounds great, Daddy!"

Zed looked down to Addison and gave her his best-crooked smile. "We'll meet you guys over there. There are still a few things I need to take care of here."

"Sounds good. We'll go ahead and get a table." Dale shook Zed's hand and hugged his daughter before he and Zyla walked down the hall towards the exit.

"And just what would these 'few things' you need to 'take care of' be?" Addison asked quietly as they watched their parents walk off.

"I believe we were interrupted earlier..." He grabbed her hand and pulled her into one of the empty rehearsal rooms, locking the door behind them.

.

* * *

**February**

"Will you be my Valentine?"

Addison closed her locker door to find Zed holding a large bouquet of black tulips.

"Baby! I love them!" Addison shrieked, throwing her arms around him. "Yes! Of course!" She kissed him passionately, not caring that they were standing in the middle of the crowded hallway of the music building. "Like you even needed to ask."

He kissed her back. "Mom's working a double at the hospital...Horror and chill?"

"You're such a romantic..." she giggled, jumping up and wrapping her legs around him. "We could watch Hostel?"

"Torture, gore, excessive nudity… That movie is basically murder porn…" he teased as he nipped at her lip. "Who's the romantic now?"

"Ms. Donnelly! Mr. Jacobs!"

They both rolled their eyes. "Sorry Principal Lee..." they said in unison as Zed placed her back down to her feet.

When the principal walked away, Zed pulled Addison back to him. "I can't wait for tonight..." he whispered giving her such a heated look that she had to squeeze her thighs together, hoping that her cheer bloomers weren't soaked through.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"You didn't actually want to watch the movie, right?" Zed asked as he laid her down on his bed.

"Hmm… I mean it is a good movie… but if you have something more… stimulating… in mind… I'm open to suggestions." She could barely get the words out, the feel of his hands running up the inside of her legs making coherent thoughts difficult.

He lifted one of her legs and began to place gentle kisses, breathing out lyrics against her skin as he slowly worked his way up.

"I love the light in your eyes and the dark in your heart  
You love our permanent chase and the bite of our bark  
We know we're classic together like Egyptian gold  
We love us..."

He slowly undressed her, throwing each piece of her cheer uniform behind him.

"It don't matter, be combative or be sweet cherry pie  
It don't matter just as long as I get all you tonight..."

His clothes joined hers on the floor. Painfully slowly, he continued the torrent of kisses along her soft skin.

"I can take you out, oh-oh  
We can kill some time, stay home  
Throw balloons, teddy bears and the chocolate eclairs away  
Got nothing but love for you, fall more in love every day  
Valentine, Valentine..."

Addison squirmed under him, desperate for more. "Zed..."

He looked up. Meeting her eyes, he bit down on her hip hard, making her back arch off the bed and a moan fall from her lips.

"So deep, your DNA's being messed with my touch  
Can't beat us  
So real, fueling the fire until we combust  
Can't touch us..."

He flattened his tongue, licking her slit. His eyes rolled back into his head as her taste hit his tongue.

"Valentine….Valentine..."

"Zed!" she pulled hard at his hair until he looked up.

"What?"

"I need you!….NOW!"

He let out a small laugh and crawled up her body, kissing her as he reached over to the nightstand drawer for a condom.

When he sat back on his heels to roll it on, Addison scooched higher up the bed, giddy with anticipation. She moved one of the pillows to lay down on, only to have an envelope slip out.

"What is this?"

Zed looked up to see her holding the envelope he had stashed away the previous week. "Oh...that..." he mumbled. He grabbed her by the ankle and pulled her back down to him. He ghosted a hand along her leg, placing it on his shoulder as he positioned himself at her entrance.

"Oh, no you don't..." she said pushing him and sitting up. "Don't think you're going to distract me with all your sexiness and that it'll make me forget that you've been hiding an unopened letter from Julliard..."

"It was worth a shot."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Z...what's going on?"

He rolled off of her and propped himself up on his elbow. "What if I made it?"

"Isn't that kinda the hope?"

"Yes...No..." he let out a frustrated sigh as he rolled onto his back and threw an arm over his eyes. "I don't even know anymore."

"Zed...please talk to me," she whispered, running a comforting hand through his hair.

He grabbed onto her ass and pulled her on top of him. "I don't want to lose you."

"You won't." She whispered against his lips. "Now open up the damn envelope, Jacobs."

He chuckled and sat up. With a wicked smirk playing across his face, he grabbed the envelope from her and ripped it open with his teeth. Addison giggled and picked up the letter as it fell out. She unfolded it and began to read it out loud. "Dear Mr. Jacobs….blah, blah, blah, we regret to inform you..." she looked up from the letter to gauge his reaction.

Zed's heart was in his throat. Julliard had been his dream since his Dad taught him his very first chord. Years and years of hard work... and now… now it was gone. "It's okay..." he whispered to himself. He looked up to Addison and gave her a weak smile. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a bit devastated right now..."

"Z..."

"It's fine, Addie...I'll be okay..."

"You got in..."

His head snapped up. "What?"

"I said, you got in," she said with a large smile as she held up the letter for him to read himself.

"But you..."

"You needed to know how you truly felt."

Zed smiled and wrapped his arms around her as he rolled them both over. "Brat!" She giggled as his lips crashed into hers."That was a dirty trick...but thank you."

"You're welcome," she whispered pulling him down for another kiss. "You and me...we're going to be just fine. You're going to go to Julliard and become the best god damn rockstar they've ever taught. I'll be recording my album. I can come to New York whenever. We can hide away in my Dad's apartment if my stupid Step-Brother isn't there or we can spend time at my mom's penthouse... Besides," she smiled, kissing him again, "what's the point of having a private jet if you don't use it every now and then."

Zed laughed. "I can't believe Addison 'I don't want to have to rely on my family money or name' Donnelly would even suggest such a thing!" he teased in mock horror.

She smacked him playfully on the chest before looking into his eyes. "All the money, all the luxury, all the comforts in this world… this life means nothing… absolutely nothing without you."

He kissed her hard. "You're so perfect."

"You're the only one who knows I'm not," she whispered.

"You're perfect for me...better?"

"I can live with it," she smiled.

"I love you, Adds."

"I love you too, forever."

"And after."

"Now make love to me."

Zed laughed softly, "Gladly...Happy Valentine's Day, Baby."

* * *

**March**

"Make a wish..." Addison whispered as she ran her tongue along his jaw.

Zed grasped her hips tighter as he thrust up. "I'm balls deep inside of you...what more could a guy wish for?"

She let out a laugh that quickly turned into a moan as he bit down on her nipple.

"Ahhh! My eyes!" Bree called out, slapping her palms against her face.

"And this is why I told you we should ring at the gate," Mason laughed from the doorway. He grabbed Bree's arm and pulled her out of the room. "We'll be by the pool smoking a bowl… meet us when you're done."

"They have shit timing," Zed said as he flipped her over and smacked her ass hard. "I was so close."

Addison looked over her shoulder and bit her lip. "Well, you did tell them to meet us over here at midnight… It's not their fault you ripped my clothes off and attacked me the second you walked in."

"I was unwrapping my birthday present!" He said in his defense. "And just so you know... a leather jacket, boots, and a thong do not count as clothes," he laughed, biting her shoulder.

"Are you complaining?"

"Hell no! It's exactly what I asked for!"

She giggled and pulled his face down to hers. "Happy birthday, Handsome."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"That was fast!" Mason teased as Addison and Zed walked into the backyard.

"I thought you said 'smoke a bowl' not 'pop a bowl'!" Zed laughed plopping himself down in one of the lounge chairs around the pool.

"We got the munchies!" Bree giggled.

"So… what kind of trouble do you want to get into for your birthday, Trouble?" Addison asked as she helped herself to a handful of Mason's popcorn.

"I have an idea, but it's kind of crazy…. pop-corn me, Baby!"

Addison giggled and tossed a piece of popcorn across the patio. "What's your crazy idea?"

Zed caught it in his mouth and smirked. "I wanna go get a tattoo."

"Seriously?" Mason asked looking at him like he'd suddenly sprouted a second head.

"Yeah. I've always wanted one. Honestly, I'm surprised I haven't gotten one already."

"You know what they say about tattoos..." Addison said in a sing-song voice.

"What would that be, Beautiful?"

"The same thing they say about piercings… they're addicting. You can't have just one."

"I'm pretty sure you're confusing piercings with Lay's potato chips," Mason said, throwing a piece of popcorn at her.

Addison shrugged. "You say potato chips, I say adrenaline rush! I'm in!"

"You are?!" Zed asked in complete shock.

"I mean, I won't get a tattoo, but I could use another piercing."

Mason threw another kernel at her. "Do you even have anything left unpierced?"

"Um, hello… do you ever see any of my piercings?"

"Well no..." he said giving her a questioning look.

"Exactly! That means there are plenty of places still to pierce! I think I'm going to get a Venus!"

Bree threw popcorn at her as well. "Pretty sure your lower back is visible."

Addison shrugged. "I'm eighteen."

"And your mom is going to flip her shit if she finds out!" Mason laughed.

She rolled her eyes and flipped him off as she walked over to Zed.

"Don't be a brat!"

"Sorry, Mase...Don't know how else to be!" She sat on Zed's lap. "So… what are you going to get?"

"Your name."

She smacked him on the chest and laughed. "Seriously, what are you getting?"

"Your. Name... Right here," he said pulling on his bottom lip.

She looked up at him in shock. "You're serious?"

"Yeah."

"But...but…"

"But what?"

"It's so permanent," she whispered, running a hand down his face.

"Adds...I love you. Nothing and nobody, not even time will change that." He kissed her roughly and smiled. "Your name is already tattooed on my heart, mind, and soul for all eternity, what's one more spot?"

Addison giggled and rolled her eyes. "You are crazy. I love you...but you're crazy."

An hour later Addison stood up from the piercer's chair and examined the two metal balls now placed in the dimples of her lower back.

"Vat ookz vad az..." Zed called out from across the room.

She turned and giggled. "What?"

The tattoo artist turned off the machine and handed Zed a small handheld mirror. Before Zed looked at his own tattoo, he turned back to Addison. "I said, that looks badass," he smiled with a wink. He looked in the mirror and flipped his bottom lip. "Zo duz viz..."

Addison walked over to him. "Oh. My. God...That is…." she was at a loss for words. "Fuck it. Carpe Noctum," she said as she closed the distance between them and took Zed's hand, sitting down on his lap. "I want one too! Your name! Same spot!"

"You do?" Bree laughed, looking up from the mirror she had been looking at to inspect her freshly pierced ear.

"Yeah..." She looked back over to Zed, gently pulling his lip down to reveal the fresh ink. "So fucking sexy..."

"Rr ya sr?"

"What?" she giggled releasing his lip.

"I said, are you sure? Piercings are one thing...but tatts are permanent."

She turned around on him, straddling his lap. "What did you tell me just a little while ago before you got my name permanently inked on that incredibly sexy lip of yours?" she trailed kisses down his jaw.

"Touche."

"I love you, Z."

"I love you, too, Adds. Forever."

"And after."

"And I'm going to gag!" Bree teased. "At least if you're getting your lip tattooed I can't hear you be all mooshy for a few minutes."

Addison flipped her off and stuck out her tongue before turning to the tattoo artist and smiling.

* * *

"Wait..." Bonzo said grabbing Zed's arm, stopping him from walking further through the parking lot. "So she has your name on her bottom lip?"

Zed nodded and kicked at the gravel beneath his feet. "Yup. She used to do this thing where she'd run her tongue along it and give me the sexiest look… Drove me fucking crazy… That look almost got us banned from the pool at the resort we were staying at during Spring Break in Cabo."

"Dude, if I have to hear about another insane vacation you got to take, I will punch you in the nuts."

Zed laughed. "Sorry man."

"It's fine. I'm just jealous as hell… The closest I ever got to an exotic vacation was being deployed... So, skipping the unbelievable trip to a tropical paradise, what happened after?"

"Prom..."

"Let me guess… king and queen… crazy ass after party…"

"Yeah, how'd you know?" Zed laughed.

Bonzo rolled his eyes.

"Look, you asked… I haven't talked about any of this shit since it happened."

"Again… just jealous as hell… I was a band nerd who didn't lose my virginity until prom night."

"And look at you now! You've got a fresh batch of groupies after every show and you've slept with half the strippers on the East Coast!" Zed teased.

"What can I say, I've come a long way..."

"From nerd to male whore..."

Bonzo smacked him. "You're one to talk."

"I was never a nerd."

"Weren't you like Valedictorian or some bullshit like that?

"No, that was Addison...I was Salutatorian," he added in a rushed whisper.

"Ha!" Bonzo smacked his shoulder again. "I knew you were a nerd."

Zed shot him a glare. "Being smart does not make you a nerd..."

"Keep telling yourself that."

"Whatevs man… Pomp and circumstance and speeches aside, graduation was still one of my favorite nights."

"Another party that would put a teen rom-com to shame?"

"Nope… after we found out that we were going to Hawaii, we had an epic jam session... There were always musicians coming and going from her Dad's house. But the night of graduation… Man, it was just amazing. So many people stopped by to congratulate her… almost half the fucking artists on the label… And then there was her Godfather."

Before Zed could say anything else, Bonzo nut punched him as hard as possible.

"Fuck…" he doubled over in pain. "I wasn't going to tell you about the entire month in Hawaii!" he coughed out.

"You jammed with fucking Slash?!

Zed carefully straightened himself out and placed a hand protectively over his crotch. "Yeah, he even complimented my choice of guitars."

"And spent a month in Hawaii?! A MONTH?!"

He nodded his head. "Best month of my life, too. We flew back to LA for a day for Mason's birthday party…" his eyes darkened for a moment as the memory ran through his mind. He shook his head to clear his thoughts. "Then we flew out to Greece the next afternoon for a few weeks… Everything was perfect," he added in a sad whisper.

"Obviously it didn't last much longer…"

"We didn't even make it past my going away party."

"What happened?"

"She threw this huge party for me at her moms. She was acting weird all fucking night. I was wasted. I passed out. The next morning I woke up at Mason's. I had a text from her with a picture showing me naked with this other girl passed out on top of me… I'd never even seen this girl before…" he shook his head and lit another cigarette. "I tried calling Adds, but it went straight to voicemail. When Mason woke up he punched me...a few times… let me tell you, drummers can hit. I swore to him over and over that I didn't cheat on her...Didn't stop him from knocking out a tooth."

He looked up at Bonzo with a sad look in his eyes. "I swear, I didn't cheat on her." He sighed and took another drag from his cigarette. "I called Addison constantly, but it went to voicemail... every fucking time. I went over to her moms, nothing...same at her Dads house and at Bree's… It's like she just fucking disappeared... So I left... And I still called her every damn day for months even after I got the locket back in the mail...until..." he took a shaky breath and closed his eyes, trying to block out the memory.

"Until the accident?"

"Yeah." Zed opened his eyes and exhaled. "Five years...And now she's here." His hand stilled on the door of the bus. "You asked me a few years ago, why I don't do relationships, why every girl is a one and done...The truth is, I miss her more than I could ever love anyone else… I know we were only together for a short time...and even if I tried to explain us, no one would ever understand… We were just… different."

They walked onto the bus, collapsing onto the built-in couch. Zed leaned over and grabbed his much loved green Les Paul guitar, plugging it into the amp. He closed his eyes as his fingers began to strum.

"It's been a while…."

.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:****And we're caught up to the present. There will be some additional flashbacks in future chapters to fill in some holes, but for the most part it's all forward progress from here. Feel free to drop me a review to let me know what you think of the story so far! I love hearing from you guys!**

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**-Stoned on You: Jaymes Young**

**-Valentine: 5 Seconds of Summer**

**(Last chapter; because I forgot to include them)**

**-Don't Blame Me: Taylor Swift**

**-Tequila: Dan+Shay**


	11. Youngblood

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

**Chapter 11**

**YOUNGBLOOD**

Zed looked up from his guitar to find Addison standing there, openly staring at him and biting her bottom lip. He locked eyes with her and smirked. "And it's been a while...since I've seen the way the candles light your face...and it's been a while...but I can still remember just the way you taste..."

Addison shook her head and cracked a smile. "You're an octave too low. Stick to your range," she called out as she walked past him and out the door.

Bonzo bit back a laugh as the door closed. "You weren't kidding."

"Shut up, Bonz..." Zed couldn't help the smile that was spreading across his face.

"Well...What the hell are you waiting for?"

Zed looked over to the door, "I can't just… she probably wouldn't want to… I..."

"You're scared shitless, aren't you?"

He nodded his head. "Yup."

"Look, man, it's up to you, but… the way I see it is that the two of you have a hell of a lot of unresolved shit to work through. We're going to be cooped up on this fucking bus, playing across the country, for the next few months…"

Zed still didn't look convinced.

Bonzo threw his hands up in the air. "Did you ever think it could be fate?"

That caught Zed's attention. With a smirk, Bonzo continued. "We're in Seabrook, Connecticut right now… you guys went to Seabrook High… I'm just saying… maybe it's more than a coincidence… Maybe the universe is finally going to cut you a break."

"I sure as shit could use one..."

"That's for damn sure."

Zed took a deep breath and stood up. "I'll be back…"

* * *

Addison sat up and discreetly wiped her eyes when she heard footsteps approaching, already knowing it was going to be him.

"Can I bum one of those from you?"

She nodded her head and passed him the pack of cigarettes, flicking her white bic for him.

"A white lighter?"

She shrugged her shoulders dismissively. "Hoping the curse will claim another in a few years."

"Only you could pull off a joke about joining the 27 club."

"Who said I was joking."

Zed shook his head and smiled. "...I thought you didn't smoke?"

"And I thought you needed a light…" she snapped before quietly adding, "A lot of things can change over five years…"

He bent down and lit his cigarette. "Some things don't, Gorgeous."

"Please don't call me that."

"Still true though."

"Zed….I had no idea you were on this tour...I never would have..." she stopped herself and shook her head. "I'm only here as a favor to Bucky."

He nodded as he stared into the distance, trying to keep his head straight. "I would think you'd be too big of a name by now to be on tour with a couple of struggling rock bands."

"You can't be struggling too much if you managed to drink enough whiskey tonight to have the smell emanating from your pores…"

He shrugged. "What else is one supposed to do when one's ex suddenly shows up out of the blue after five goddamn years?"

Her shoulder sagged like she was carrying the weight of the world. She looked so sad and defeated. It took everything in him not to wrap his arms around her. He settled for sitting down next to her on the bench.

"So...Jacobs?"

"I couldn't use Addison or Donnelly or any combination there of...Get over it...Besides, doesn't seem like you're using it these days. Zed Necrodopolus, my ass… You're not even Greek." She mumbled something that vaguely sounded like "Croatian" under her breath.

"I have my reasons."

"Well so do I."

"You have no idea what I've been through!" Zed nearly growled.

"Neither do you!" she snapped back turning her face to glare at him.

His anger ebbed the moment her eyes locked with his. She could still disarm his with just a single look. "You always were hot when you were angry."

"I'm always hot...it's a genetic curse," she whispered, the fight she had in her suddenly gone.

The air between them charged as they subconsciously leaned in closer, "Addison I'm…."

"Don't… please..." she said fighting back tears. She abruptly stood up, leaving Zed to watch her walk away for the third time that night.

With a heavy sigh, he laid down on the bench, looking up at the stars in the sky.

* * *

Addison tossed and turned in her bunk. An all too familiar nightmare running through her head.

**ZZZZZZZ**

"Nooooo!" she pouted as Mason handed her cup with a clear liquid in it.

"I told you… If I had to drink tequila for your birthday, you were drinking vodka for mine."

"I didn't think you meant it!" she sniffed at her cup and cringed. "Are you sure this isn't rubbing alcohol?"

"It's Tito's, I swear!" Mason laughed.

"You're lucky I love you, Mase..." she pinched her nose and downed the entire cup. "Oh god is that vile! Bad decisions, right there...I swear!"

Zed laughed as he sipped his drink. "Don't worry, Baby, I'll be right by your side all night to make sure you don't get into any trouble."

"Says the man who is literally nicknamed Trouble!" she giggled as Mason handed her another drink.

**ZZZZZZZ**

"Hey!" she looked up at Zed with a huge grin on her face. "We're in the bathroom!"

"That's right," he chuckled. "We were getting you out of those wet clothes… remember?"

"But I like being all wet." She ran her tongue along her bottom lip and bit down, knowing even in her drunken haze that it would drive him wild.

He ran his hands down her sides. "I like it when you're wet, too… But I prefer to be the one to make you that way… Not the pool…" He bit back a laugh and smiled. "No more vodka for you."

She pouted and looked back up to him.

"Is something wrong, Baby?" he whispered into her ear as he pulled the soaking wet dress up over her body.

"Yes." Somehow her voice had gotten huskier. She wanted him so badly she could taste it.

"What is it? He squeaked out, trying his best to focus on drying her off.

"This is wrong..." she pulled on his hand, making him drop the towel. She placed his hand in between her thighs, pushing his fingers until they were touching her wet flesh. "You aren't in here right now."

His eyes turned nearly black with desire. "We're in the middle of a party..."

"That's never stopped us before..." She pulled his hand away and shoved his fingers into his mouth, making him groan and whimper as he sucked them clean.

"Christ, you taste so fucking good…"

She slid her hands through his dark hair as he kissed her. His lips shifted to her jaw, her neck, her collarbone.

Ripples of pleasure coursed through her body. She reveled in the scrape of his callused fingers against her skin, the heat of his mouth on her breasts.

"Fuck..." He cursed under his breath.

"Yes, please."

He reluctantly pulled away. "No… we can't… I took my wallet and phone out of my pocket before I jumped in after you. They're still up on the roof by the pool."

"Does that mean you don't want to fuck me anymore?"

He let out a humorless laugh. "I always want to fuck you."

"Then do it…"

He looked to the door. "I can be back in here in less than five minutes… don't move!"

She grabbed him and pulled him down to her. "Need you...now..."

"Gorgeous, I'm trying to do the right thing here...I don't want us to regret anything when we sober up."

She jumped up and wrapped her arms and legs around him "Fuck regret!" she panted before crashing her mouth down on his. She could still taste herself on his tongue and it was enough to make her dizzy with need.

Snarling loudly into her mouth, he grabbed her bare ass and ground her into his throbbing erection. He thrust up against her as they devoured each other.

Everything seemed to happen in a blur after that.

He set her down to wrestle his button fly, only to have her beat him to it. With loud panting that was peppered with kisses and lots of fumbling, they both worked to yank his wet jeans down over his hips enough to allow his erection to spring free.

She pulled him down to the rug on the floor. She straddled his waist and gripped him by the base of his cock, positioning the tip at her entrance. They both watched their bodies connect slowly. Once just the very tip was inside, she stopped moving completely, waiting for him to look up at her. When their eyes finally met again, Addison placed her hands on his shoulders and leaned down, kissing him softly before pulling back and watching his expression as she sank down on him in one swift thrust.

It was her favorite part, watching his face. Sure, it felt better than anything she had ever known, but there was nothing like seeing that look of shock and amazement cross over his features. No matter how many times he'd been inside her, he never failed to look simply awestruck at how good she felt.

This time was the best one yet.

His eyes widened and his brow furrowed, and he somehow managed to look scared at how good it felt as if it just wasn't humanly possible for anything on earth to feel so right. "Adds..."

"I know," she whimpered. "So fucking good..." she smiled. Holding his gaze, she began to move on him, using his shoulders for leverage as she bounced up and down. Rocking her hips into him with every upward stroke, it wasn't long before she had built up an amazing rhythm that made them both throw their heads back and moan.

Zed had begun a steady litany of, "Oh God… Oh, God… So good… So good… Yes… Yes… Yes yes yes so fucking good!" and by the time he grabbed her ass to pull her onto him harder so that he could thrust up inside her even faster, he had regressed to nothing more than grunts and snarls.

He sat up, burying his face into her cleavage, kissing and sucking her soft skin. He licked, sucked, and bit each taut nipple repeatedly, unable to focus on only one. His growls and moans were creating the most delicious vibrating feeling around her nipples, which cause Addison to buck her hips sharply into him, setting off a whole new round of snarls. It was a vicious cycle that neither of them wanted to end.

Zed slid his hands up and gripped her hips, lifting her up and down on him as he slammed up into her as hard as possible.

"Fuck!" she yelled at the sudden change, her body beginning to tighten around him.

"Yes, baby… that's it!" he moaned. "Touch yourself for me. We're both so close...I want to feel you come all over me."

She complied quickly, sliding her hand down between their bodies until she was rubbing her tight bundle of nerves furiously in small circles. The added stimulation caused her to fall over the edge, her body squeezing and milking him as she found her release.

She only had enough sanity left at that point to look him in the eye and beg him, "Please! Come in me! I need to feel you!"

"Oh god!" he cried out. "You're so fucking wet...so fucking tight… I can't… I can't get enough of you… Fuck!" And with one final thrust of his hips, he emptied himself inside her, filling her to overflowing.

Addison collapsed against him then, every ounce of energy disappearing with her orgasm, and her jet-lag exhaustion began mixing with her alcohol intake. Zed held her tightly, tucking her head under his chin as he stroked her back.

"I love you, Baby… Forever."

"And after..." she whispered as closed her eyes.

**ZZZZZZZ**

"Please no...please no...please no…," she whispered to herself on a continuous loop as she paced around her bathroom. When the timer on her phone went off she inhaled sharply and turned back towards the bathroom counter. Hesitantly she walked towards it. She closed her eyes and picked up the small white stick sitting on the counter. "You can do this Addison..." she opened her eyes slowly. Two lines. Pregnant. She dropped down to the ground and hugged her knees. "Damn it," she whispered as tears began to fall from her eyes.

"Adds? You in there?"

"I'll be right out!" she called, hoping her voice didn't sound like she had been crying. She tossed the test into the wastebasket and threw some tissues on top to cover it up. She checked her reflection in the mirror and took a deep breath before opening the door.

"Hey!" Zed said as he took in her expression. "Were you crying?"

"I'm fine, really."

He wrapped her up in a tight hug. "Listen to me, Baby. You and me, always. We're going to make this work."

"I know."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"Forever."

"And after"

"It'll only be a few weeks. You're still flying out for your birthday, right?"

"Yeah, my brother is picking me up. He even promised he wouldn't put a hit on you for 'defiling his baby sister...'"

Zed swallowed loudly.

"Don't worry, he knows I'd take him out if he, or any member of 'the family', ever tried to hurt you."

"Good to know," he whispered, leaning over to capture her lips in a kiss. "I promise, I'll call you every fucking day. You'll hear from me so much you'll be sick of me and won't have a chance to miss me."

"You better," she said with a sniffle.

He kissed her again. "Come on, Gorgeous… everyone's starting to arrive."

**ZZZZZZZ**

"Zed! Zed! Zed! Zed!"

"Your adoring fans are calling you back up," Addison smiled up to him before pushing him back towards the stage.

Their friends broke into applause as he hopped up and grabbed the microphone from Owen.

"Zed! Zed! Zed! Zed!"

"Alright, alright… I guess one last song…" He picked up his guitar. "Addison, Baby… This one's for you…

Something in the way she moves  
Attracts me like no other lover  
Something in the way she woos me

I don't want to leave her now  
You know I believe in how

Somewhere in her smile, she knows  
That I don't need no other lover  
Something in her style that shows me

Don't want to leave her now  
You know I believe and how

You're asking me will my love grow  
I don't know, I don't know  
You stick around, now it may show  
I don't know, I don't know

Something in the way she knows  
And all I have to do is think of her  
Something in the things she shows me

I don't want to leave her now  
You know I believe in how…

I love you, Adds."

He jumped off the stage and picked her up, swinging her around and kissing her as their friends hooted and hollered.

"You remembered my favorite Beatles song!"

"I remember everything about you, Gorgeous..."

**ZZZZZZZ**

"Oh God, it smells terrible in here!" Addison said as she walked into the pool house.

"Sorry," Mason laughed as he let out a loud belch. "Drink?"

"No thanks… Have you seen Z?"

"No… I thought he was with you."

"The last time I saw him he was playing shot-pong," Owen said between burps.

Addison pretended to throw up. "Seriously what is wrong with you two…" She looked over to Bree, "Wanna help me find my probably wasted boyfriend? she laughed.

"Anything to get away from these two," Bree giggled, passing the joint to Mason. "Besides, Hungover Zed is no fun on a flight… remember Aspen?"

"Fucking Tequila!" Mason shouted.

"Don't start with that shit Mase...your little vodka payback fucked me over in more ways than one."

Bree gave her a strange look.

"I'll tell you later," Addison sighed. "Let's just go find him before his mother has to deal with him tomorrow."

**ZZZZZZZ**

Nothing made sense. It was definitely Zed, he was definitely naked, and the naked girl sleeping on his chest was definitely not her. As the reality of the situation started to sink in, she could feel her heart shatter. She dropped to her knees and started to cry.

"Adds… there's got to be an explanation..."

"I…." she choked back a sob. "I can't do this right now..."

Bree knelt on the ground next to her. "What can I do to help?"

"I need everyone out of here..." she cried into Bree's shoulder. "That includes…." she waved in Zed's general direction.

Bree stroked her hair. "I'll take care of everything… let's get you upstairs… I'm sure everything will be better in the morning."

She nodded her head and sat up straight. "You're right..." she pulled out her phone and snapped a picture. _**'Call me when you sober up… We need to talk.'**_

**ZZZZZZZ**

"I still haven't heard from him," Addison sniffled as she rolled onto her back on her bed.

"He's probably still asleep… Like I was five seconds ago... He was smashed...didn't even wake up when Mase and Owen picked him up… Just give it some time. It's only nine in the morning," Bree mumbled out in between loud yawns.

"You don't understand. I need to know what I saw last night didn't happen!"

"Relax, girl… I'm sure there's an explanation… That boy loves you way too much to do something that stupid."

"I hope so… not just for me," she whispered.

"What was that?"

"Bree… I fucked up… big time." She wiped at her eyes. "I'm pregnant." The line was silent for a moment. "Please say something..."

"Did I hear that right?"

"Yeah…"

"Does Zed know?"

"No… Not yet."

"Addison, darling… are you awake in there?"

"Oh, shit!" she sat up in bed and dried her eyes. "Bree, I've got to go...my mom is back."

"Shit! Okay, girl...Call me!"

Addison hung up the phone. "I'm up, Mother."

Missy opened the door and walked in, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Addison, darling, you look like hell! Is everything okay?"

"Yeah… I'm just tired… When did you get back in town?"

"Bright and early this morning… I got the strangest phone call last night… apparently, there was a party being thrown at my house… I guess those cameras I had installed finally paid off."

"You installed… cameras? In the yard?" she asked in disbelief."

"Oh, not just in the yard… All throughout the house." Missy grabbed her arm tight. "I always knew you would ruin your life."

"Mom..." she whispered, trying to pull her arm away. "You're hurting me..."

"You stupid girl… I should have sent you away a long time ago."

A chill ran down her spine. Her phone suddenly vibrated and Led Zeppelin's, Whole Lot Of Love started to play. It was Zed's ringtone. She grabbed for her phone with her free hand.

"I don't think so," Missy sneered as she snatched the phone from her and turned it off. "You won't be needing this…. Gentlemen! We're ready!"

Two large men wearing uniforms walked into her room and towards her, pulling her to her feet.

"MOM!"

"Addison, darling. It's for your own good," Missy smiled as she walked up to her. "The Sisters of Quiet Mercy will know exactly how to handle you and your little…situation." She reached out and grabbed the locket hanging from around her neck, pulling it hard and breaking the chain.

Addison fought against the guards, but it was no use. "You can't do this to me! I'm eighteen for Christ sake! I'm your daughter! MOM!"

.

* * *

"Casey…" Bucky softly shook her shoulder, trying to wake her up.

"No… Mom… Please..."

"Casey..." She was still asleep. He knew exactly what she was dreaming about. He'd long since lost track of how many times he held her while she had this same nightmare. He was just thankful she wouldn't get to the worst of it now. He looked around before leaning further into her bunk. "Addison…."

Her eyes shot open. "Bucky?..."

"I'm here..."

She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly, trying to fight off the tears. "It was horrible… like I was back there..."

"I know… but it was just a dream. You're okay. You're never going back to that place. I swear."

She nodded her head against his neck.

"Why didn't you tell me you were still having that nightmare?"

She shrugged. "I haven't had it in months...What time is it?"

"Four."

"PM?"

He nodded his head.

"Fuck...Time change… I'm sorry."

"It's fine. You've got soundcheck in an hour. But we have a band meeting, now. I brought you coffee..." he offered, holding it up for her. "It's just how you like it… black… like that twisted little soul of yours..."

"You say the sweetest things, brother dear..." she whispered as she sat up and grabbed her purse, putting her sunglasses on to cover her bloodshot eyes.

"You ready?"

She nodded her head and followed him to the back of the bus where both bands were gathered.

Zed almost spit his water out when Addison walked into the room. She was all long legs and wild hair with a pair of Ray-Bands covering her eyes. But what really caught him by surprise was the worn-out oversized maroon and white sweatshirt that hung loosely from her small frame. The same sweatshirt that had once belonged to him. He tried to hide the smile on his face but failed miserably.

"Seattle Prep?" Lacey asked in her typical grating voice.

Addison took a sip of coffee. "What?"

"Your sweatshirt… Is that where you went to school?"

Addison looked down, a sudden wave of panic hitting her as she realized what she had fallen asleep in. Not that she didn't sleep in it almost every night, but usually she didn't have to worry about seeing the rightful owner of said sweatshirt. "Um...no… I didn't go there."

"Oh…" Lacey shrugged and turned her attention back to Tracey.

She nervously glanced over towards Zed only to find him biting back a smile. "Nice shirt," he mouthed.

Addison readjusted her coffee cup so that she could subtly flip him off.

"Okay, children..." Bucky called out as he walked into the center of the room. "Now that we're all together, let's get down to business. Acey's, you're opening tonight."

"What?! No!" Lacey yelled. "How is that fucking fair? We opened the last show!"

Bucky rolled his eyes. "You know the deal, Lacey. Whichever band completes the most new songs headlines."

"But… but..."

"No buts, Lacey. You agreed."

"How can I write when I know it's just going to be stolen again!" she glared over towards Zed. "It's not like he's written anything lately!"

"Actually, I finished a new song this morning… tough break," he said with a wide smile. "Enjoy warming up the crowd for us though."

"Fuck you, Necrodopolus!"

"No thanks… it wasn't that good the first time."

Lacey sneered and slammed her hand down onto the table.

Bucky rolled his eyes. "Moving on…"

.

* * *

Bucky pulled at the ends of his hair. "You can not wear that!" he whisper yelled to Addison, trying to keep the rest of the Acey's from hearing him.

Addison rolled her eyes and grabbed the bottle of tequila off the dressing room table. "And why the hell not? I'm more covered than Lacey and Stacey! They're practically wearing swimsuits!" she snapped back before uncapping the bottle and taking a large swig.

He took a step closer to her and dropped his voice even lower. "Neither of them are my sister!"

"Maybe you should be a little more supportive and thankful that I'm even doing this shit for you!" she whispered back. They both looked up when they heard the door open up.

"Damn, Princess! You look hot!" Eliza called out as she, Zed and Bonzo walked into the dressing room.

Bucky looked over to Eliza pleadingly. "Don't encourage her."

Zed had stopped dead in his tracks. All coherent thoughts leaving his mind. Thigh-high black leather boots, fishnets, high waist red leather hot pants, and a skin-tight black longsleeved crop top...He licked his bottom lip and pulled it between his teeth.

Addison wasn't faring much better. The members of Zombies were all wearing matching straight jacket inspired bondage jackets with their signature green hair in disarray. But Zed… the addition of leather pants, a fuck-ton of guy-liner, and white contacts...he looked like he stepped straight out of the sexiest horror movie ever. "Holy Hitchcock..." she mumbled to herself. She took another large swig of tequila.

"I think you've had enough," Bucky warned, grabbing the bottle away from her and snapping her back into reality.

"B, I'm not drunk. I'm buzzed. And quite honestly, it's probably for the best!"

Lacey bent over in front of the vanity mirror and readjusted her cleavage in her barely-there top. "It's showtime!"

* * *

The stage was dark. She could sense the audience moving below her, but there wasn't much noise. Her knee bounced hard. This was it. Her first time on stage in almost three years. She looked over to the side of the stage to find Bucky giving her an encouraging smile. She closed her eyes tightly, willing her breathing to steady and for her heart to stop beating in her ears.

Stacey cracked off a four-count with her drumsticks. Addison went into autopilot as she and Tracey ripped into the first song. The spotlight fell on her, shocking, blinding. She focused on her fingers, as her heart started to beat in time to the rhythms her bass controlled. Massive, rolling low notes pounding in her ears. Cheers and whistles pierced the smoke-laden club.

.

* * *

Claps and whistles took control of the air as The Acey's departed the stage. Addison made a hasty retreat, dumping off her bass and rushing past everyone toward the fire exit.

The moment the cold air hit her face, she started to cry her eyes out. The music high overwhelming her and the emotional turmoil of being back on stage finally catching up with her.

The door opened behind her. "Where the hell are you going Necrodopolus? We're on in 5!"

"Ease the fuck up, E! I've got to piss!" The door slammed shut again.

Addison looked up. There was Zed standing still as a statue staring at her. Her skin registered the cold like an afterthought and she wrapped her arms around herself. She casually brushed away the last tear, hoping he'd just think she had something in her eye.

"Addison..."

"You mean Casey?"

He rolled his eyes and threw his hands up in the air. "What the fuck ever..." He took a step closer to her. "You want to explain what the hell that was on stage? I mean, I'm all for helping the Acey's tank, I just would have liked to have known that was the plan."

"I'm not trying to get them to tank."

"Well, you sure as shit didn't do them any favors."

"I played those songs perfectly."

"Yeah, very precise..." he took another step towards her. "The Addison I know would have owned that fucking crowd with a single goddamn look and would have been a force of nature when she played..." he shook his head in disbelief. "You didn't even look up form your bass...and you looked like you were trying to hide in the curtain..." he reached out and tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear, letting his fingers linger just a second too long. "Where the hell was the fire… the passion?"

"Burned out a long time ago."

"Bullshit. You were born to perform."

"That was another lifetime ago."

"I don't buy it… The Addison that I know..."

She cut him off. "You don't fucking know me anymore!" She took a step back, not realizing just how close they had been to one another. "I'm sorry if I didn't live up to your fucking expectations! That was the first time I've been on a goddamn stage in almost three years!"

"What?"

The heavy metal door opened and Bonzo stuck his head out. "Z! We're going on now!"

"I'll be right there." He turned back to Addison, but she was already gone.

.

* * *

Zombies was already up and running by the time Addison made her way back into the venue. She leaned against the bar at the back of the crowd. She just wanted to go back to the bus and try to sleep, desperate for the day to be over, but the masochist in her won out. She needed to see him play.

Zed stood to the left, Bonzo on the right, and Eliza sat behind the drums in the middle. Their grungy song sizzled.

Addison's breath caught as she watched Zed. He was a hot piece of rock god ass on that stage. Pure sex, pure soul. He wooed the half-naked women at his feet, flaunting suggestive smiles between screamed lyrics, tossing them guitar picks, and serenading them. And his voice...fuck… if she didn't have a long sordid history with him, she'd be sitting on some guy's shoulders flashing her tits at him right now.

The band was super tight. Every note perfect, every beat spot on, every smile perfectly engineered for maximum crowd reaction. The music rattled the walls, the rafters, the floor, like an audio dragon with breath of deafness. It was metal and leather and tattoos. It was raw sex with a shot of tequila, and satin sheets set afire. And it was all too much for her. She bit down on her trembling bottom lip and turned back towards the exit.

She hated him more than ever. And after that performance, she wanted him so fucking badly. When she finally got back onto the bus she leaned her head back against the inside of the door and let out a loud sob.

Tracey popped his head out from the crawl space above the driver cabin. "Hey, Casey… you okay?"

Addison quickly dried her eyes, thankful that her heavy eyeliner was already smeared. "Yeah… sorry… I didn't realize anyone else was in here yet… Just a long couple days catching up with me."

He jumped down and walked over to her, pulling her in for a hug. "I was attempting to write the bands next song since Lacey refuses to."

"How's it coming?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "Eh… I've got the chorus and the bridge, but verses aren't usually my area… I really want to finish this fucking song though… I hate opening."

"Maybe I can help."

"You write?"

"I dabble," she smiled. "Let's hear what you've got."

Tracey climbed up and grabbed his guitar and notepad. He sat on the bench and began to play.

"You're pushing and pushing, I'm pulling away  
Pulling away from you  
I give, and I give, and I give and you take, give and you take…

Youngblood  
Say you want me  
Say you want me  
Out of your life  
Then I'm just a dead man walking tonight  
But you need it, yeah you need it  
All of the time  
Yeah, ooh ooh ohh..."

"Would you mind?" she asked, gesturing towards his notebook.

Tracey handed it to her. "Not at all."

She read it over a few times. "Play what you're thinking for the first verse… I think I've got something that could work." She listened again and jotted down the words in his notepad. "Here...give this a try..."

Tracey started to strum his guitar as he sang the verse she had just written.

"Remember the words you told me?  
Love me 'til the day I die  
Surrender my everything 'cause you made me believe you're mine.  
Yeah, you used to call me baby,  
now you're calling me by name  
Takes one to know one, yeah  
You beat

me at my own damn game..."

He smiled up to her before continuing with what he already had.

"You're pushing and pushing, I'm pulling away  
Pulling away from you  
I give, and I give, and I give and you take, give and you take…

Youngblood  
Say you want me  
Say you want me  
Out of your life  
Then I'm just a dead man walking tonight  
But you need it, yeah you need it  
All of the time  
Yeah, ooh ooh ooh..."

He popped his hand across the guitar strings to silence them and looked over to her.

"That's it!" He leaned over and hugged her. "That was awesome! Thank you, Casey! You're a lifesaver!"

"You're welcome, Tracey."

"We can work out the bass and drums tomorrow while we're driving!" He pulled back and looked at her nervously. "Would you mind keeping this a secret between us? Lacey would flip her shit if she knew I needed help."

"It's not a problem at all. Let me know if you ever get stuck again."

"Thank you, girl," he said hugging her again. "Now come on! We've got to go shmooze with some fans in the green room!"

"Do we have to? I was really hoping to just go to sleep."

"Are you kidding me? It's the best part of this gig!"

She didn't look convinced.

"There's free drinks..."

She let out a heavy sigh. "Fine… But I'm not staying long."

Tracey clapped excitedly as he grabbed her arm and started to pull her towards the door. "Those boys are going to love you… almost as much as I love those Fendi thigh highs! What size shoe do you wear by the way?"

* * *

Zed slammed his fist against the dumpster. "Did you see her in there?! Was there a fucking person in the room that she wasn't flirting with?!"

"Z, calm the hell down, man," Bonzo said as he took a deep drag from his cigarette. "She was doing the exact same thing you were doing… interacting with fans… it's almost like it's part of the job."

"Sarcasm… nice..."

Bonzo blew him a kiss. "At least she didn't leave with a groupie on each arm like you usually do."

"One is bad enough!" He punched the dumpster again.

"Says the man that was getting a hummer from one girl and making out with another when she walked in."

"Look… I'm not stupid enough to think that she hasn't been with anyone else since me… she's way too much of a wildcat...but fuck!" he threw another punch.

"Dude! Do not fuck up your hand… We've got another gig tomorrow night."

"I'm fine...I'm fine..." he said trying to keep his anger in check. "It's just the first time I've ever seen her with anyone else."

The metal door opened and Stacey walked out. She eyed him from head to toe and smiled before walking towards the bus.

"Maybe I just need to fuck her out of my system..."

"Because that's been working so well for you over the years," Bonzo sighed.

"Only one way to find out," he smirked. "Hey, Stace...wait up..."

.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****Okay, I need Z2 to come out STAT. This writers block has been no joke and I am in desperate need of some fresh inspiration.**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**-Something: The Beatles**

**-Youngblood: 5 Seconds of Summer**

**And if you want the inspiration for the song the bands played:**

**-Temple: Tonight Alive (The Acey's)**

**-Reapers: Muse (Zombies)**


	12. Six Feet Under

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

**Chapter 12**

**SIX FEET UNDER**

Lacey screamed and threw her notebook across the room, narrowly missing Tracey.

"Hey!" he yelled over to her. "The fuck was that for?"

Lacey rolled her eyes. "I wasn't aiming for you! Not everything is about you!" she snapped. "I can't write a goddamn thing! What if someone tries to steal one of my songs again?! Huh? It's not like Zed's been writing a ton of new shit lately, except for that song he pulled out of his ass yesterday! What if he gets desperate?"

Tracey sighed and sat down across from Addison at the table. "Here we go again..." he mouthed. "So glad we've got one song done."

"I left myself completely vulnerable with him! And what did he do? He slept with me just so he could take my song! He knew I wanted more than a one night fuck! If he was still so hung up on his ex, he should have never slept with me!"

"I don't think Zed is hung up on anyone," Stacey laughed as she walked into the back room to join them. "I think he just doesn't do relationships. And I'm pretty sure he told you that… He's told everyone that… numerous times."

Lacey glared at her.

"I'm just saying..." Stacey whispered more to herself than anyone.

"Oh, he so is still hung up on this girl. First off, he has her name tattooed on the inside of his lip."

Addison started to cough and grabbed her water bottle, downing almost the entire thing.

"What's wrong with you?" Lacey asked her.

"Sorry… swallowed wrong" she shook her head. "I wouldn't worry too much about the tattoo thing...I mean… I wouldn't think that would mean he's hung up on her. Maybe he was just really young when he got it and things didn't work out."

"If that were the case he wouldn't have been saying her name in his sleep..." Lacey snapped back.

Addison felt flush. "Is it hot in here?" she fanned herself for a second before slipping out of her leather jacket.

"Baby girl has ink!" Tracey exclaimed as he noticed the tattoos on her arms. "Were you trying to hide them?"

Addison shook her head. "No. I've just been freezing since I got here."

"It's early September! It's not even that cold yet, honey."

She shrugged. "California girl."

"Cal-i-fornia gurls they're undeniable…." Tracey sang as he hopped up on the table and started to dance. "fine, fresh, fierce…."

Addison rolled her eyes and smiled before throwing a pillow at him. "Don't bring that bitch Perry into this."

"I've only got one," Stacey said as she stood up and pushed down the waistband of her jeans to show a heart made from a treble and bass clef. "How many do you have?"

"Um..." Addison mentally took a tally, making sure not to count her first one. "Nine...maybe ten if you count the back piece as two..." she shrugged. "I've kind of stopped counting."

Tracey's jaw dropped open. "Alright, these I have got to see! You're so tiny! Where the hell are they? Show and tell time!"

"No...really..." Addison tried to change the subject but Tracey had already pulled his pant leg up to show off a hyper-realistic fender guitar tattooed on the back of his calf. "Oh wow...that's awesome!" she smiled, admiring it. "The detail is phenomenal… I'm more of a Gibson loyalist, but still..."

Lacey rolled her eyes. "Oh God, not you too… Fucking Zed," she mumbled under her breath. She flipped her ponytail and recollected herself. "It's a good thing that tatt came out as well as it did...Tracey cried the entire time," she laughed. She pushed up her shirt sleeve to reveal a brightly colored half sleeve of birds resting on a cherry tree.

"Okay, that is beautiful. Where did you get it?"

"New York. My brother did all of ours," she smiled. "So...what do you have? You don't end up with that many tattoos without there being some good stories."

"Not all stories are good, and lord knows none of mine are..."

"Come on, Casey...pleeeeeeease..." Tracey begged with large puppy dogs eyes.

She sighed and stood up. "Fine...I got this one with my Dad a few years ago," she said holding up her right wrist to show a music staff with watercolor notes splashed across it. "Then I've got…." she held up her other wrist "Momento Mori' tattooed on this one."

"What does that mean?" Tracey asked, still perched on top of the table.

"Remember that you will die."

"Charming..." Lacey said with a slight eye roll.

Addison held out her forearm. "I have this one..." she said, not bothering to explain the words tattooed alongside a skeleton surrounded by flowers. She took off her shirt and turned around before taking off her bra to show off the ones on her back. She pointed to her right flank, "this one."

"A beautiful little fool?" Lacey asked.

She nodded her head. "It's a quote from the Great Gatsby… It's the best thing a girl could be in this world..." she shrugged. "Then I got the wings," she said motioning towards the large black angel wings that took up the majority of her back. "The words were added a few weeks later."

"Take these broken wings and learn to fly..." Stacey read. "Blackbird... from the Beatles?"

"Yeah," Addison said covering her breasts with her hands and turning back around. "Let's see...this one..." she said, motioning to the art deco-inspired breastplate tattoo with a single bright green light on top. "Another Gatsby inspired one… the lantern is supposed to symbolize hope and love and all that shit… Um...then I have an Alpha/Omega right here..." she said pointing to the side of her left breast.

"Religious?" Lacey asked.

"No… not in the least. Alpha & Omega, A and Z, the beginning and the end… it has a lot of personal meaning..." her voice trailed off as she explained. She put her bra back on and exhaled. "Where was I… oh, yeah…" she undid her pants and pushed them down her hips. "I have an Edgar Allen Poe quote here," she said pointing to the top of her bikini line.

"We loved with a love that was more than love..." Stacey read. "That's beautiful."

"Thank you," Addison said softly, not trusting her voice. She pushed her jeans down lower to show off her latest. "And this one..." she said with a flourish, displaying a rather gruesome looking bite with green and purple veins highlighted around it, "would be the most recent. It's a zombie bite."

"Nice La Perla."

She turned around to see Zed standing in the doorway. She blew him a kiss and flipped him off before pulling her pants back up. "Nope, Victoria's."

Lacey sneered at their exchange. "You know they fucked up the quote on your forearm, right?"

Zed walked in and looked over Addison's shoulder as she held her arm back out to look at it. He rolled his eyes. "It's not a fuck up. It's Latin for seize the night."

"How would you know?" Lacey snapped at him.

Zed shrugged. "I knew someone who used to say it and it kind of stuck with me," he pushed up the sleeve of his jacket and showed them the same words tattooed on his wrist. "Anyone can seize the day...where's the fun in that."

"We were just talking tatts, Zeddikins!" Tracey said. "Want to join our little show and tell? I'll show you mine if you show me the rest of yours," he said with a flirty wink.

"I'm flattered...really...but no thanks."

"Aww...come on Zeddikins." Addison teased. "You just got a whole eyeful of mine. It's only fair." She raised her eyebrow in challenge as she slipped on her black leather jacket, not bothering with her discarded t-shirt on the ground.

Zed smirked and shook his head. "You asked for it...try not to drool too much."

"In your dreams."

"Over and over again, princess," he winked at her before shrugging out of his jacket and pulling his shirt up over his head.

Addison did her best to keep her jaw from dropping. She had always loved seeing him without his shirt on, but the addition of all the ink now covering his arms and chest...she bit back a silent moan. His entire right arm was covered in a full zombie cemetery tattoo sleeve. She unconsciously took a step closer to make out the rest.

"Lookit, how cute!" Tracey said hopping off the table and walking over towards them. "You guys both have nerdy lantern tattoos!"

Addison looked down to Zed's left forearm. Sure enough, there was a green lantern with the words "Born back ceaselessly into the past."

"You both have Beatles tats, too," Stacey pointed out.

Addison grabbed his arm and held it out. "With every mistake, we must surely be learning," she read out in a barely audible whisper. "George Harrison fan?"

His heart was racing from the feel of her hands on him, even if it was just his arm. "He was vastly underutilized," he said catching her eye. "Don't you think?"

Addison smiled shyly as she continued to examine the ink. "A Cherry bomb, huh? What's the story there?" she smirked.

Zed laughed nervously. "Well, let's just say there's nothing hotter than a girl who can shred better than Joan Jett and make it look effortless."

"Queen of the night tulips?" She asked looking up into his eyes.

"They remind me of a girl..."

"Would that be the same girl whose name you have on the inside of your bottom lip?" Lacey sneered.

"You mean this one?" he asked looking over to Lacey and pulling his lip down to show her. "Sure is... the only girl I ever loved," he said, catching Addison's eyes.

Addison's breath caught, slowly she walked around him following the ink to his back. "What are these..."

"Oh...I got those in the army," he said nervously.

Addison stopped. "Army?"

"Yeah...got this one when I finished basic, and this one after my tour in Iraq, and this one after Afghanistan."

"Iraq and Afghanistan?!" she caught herself before she said anything else.

"Yeah," he whispered stepping away from her. He pulled his t-shirt back over his head. "You kids have fun with the rest of your little show and tell." He grabbed his jacket and walked back to the front of the bus. They all heard the door slam shut.

"Well, that was hot..." Tracey giggled. "I think that just gave me an idea for another song!"

Addison was reeling internally.

"I need a cigarette," she said more to herself than the band as she walked out of the room. She stepped off the bus and looked around, spotting Zed a few buildings away. She took off in his direction, catching up with him as he passed a small brick storefront. She reached out and pulled him into the side ally, tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

"Addi..."

She pulled back and punched him as hard as she could in the face.

"What the shit, Addison!" He yelled grabbing his face.

"You joined the fucking Army!"

"Yeah! So what!"

"What the fuck happened to Julliard?"

"Why do you fucking care?!"

"You could have fucking died over there!"

"Again, Addison! Why do you care? I tried calling you every fucking day for months! You obviously didn't give a shit then, so why do you, now!"

Her tears finally fell. "I couldn't talk to you! That doesn't mean I wanted you to die!"

"You could have fooled me..."

"You have no idea what I fucking went through!"

"Neither do you!"

They stared at each other, both panting from screaming, their noses almost touching. He pressed her back against the brick wall with his body and kissed her long and hard. She kissed him back with the same passion, her fingers tangling in his hair, pulling him to her with all her might. He groaned at how fervidly she responded to him, as their tongues moved frantically against each other. He turned her to face the wall, pushing her against it with his body. His hands ran down her arms, and taking her hands in his, he pulled her arms above her head then held her wrists in one hand high against the wall. Pressing his hard cock against her back, he whispered in her ear "Tell me to stop."

She moaned. "No."

His hand moved across her bare stomach, moving up under her bra so he could grasp her breasts. He rolled her nipple between his thumb and finger before pulling at the metal bar from her piercing, making her gasp and buck against him. "I didn't think you could get any fucking sexier...but the ink..."

"Oh, God..."

His hand moved down to unbutton and unzip her jeans, then flattening his palm against her, he slid it down the inside of her panties, his fingers brushing against her piercing, feeling how wet she was for him. "Addie..." Still holding her hands above her, he pulled her jeans and panties down with his other hand then unbuttoned his own jeans, pulling his cock out. "I want you so fucking bad..."

"Zed..."

He bent lower, running his hard length between her legs. "Tell me, Addison. Tell me you want me to stop."

"I can't." She started to cry. "I don't want you to stop." The tears ran down her face. He still wanted her, and God knew she wanted him.

His lips were on the side of her neck, sucking, licking, biting, then moved back up to her ear. "Tell me what you want then, Adds," he whispered.

"I want…I want you, Zed. I want you." At that moment, he pushed his length inside her, making her cry out.

"Is that what you want?" he asked as he moved in her, pushing up hard, making her breath catch.

She let out a moan. "Yes, it's what I want, God, yes."

Letting her wrists go, both hands went to her hips as he pulled her into him, driving his cock powerfully inside her. Her hands went flat against the hard brick so she was bent over, as she thrust her ass toward him.

"You like me inside you, don't you?"

"Very observant..."

He smacked her ass hard. "Don't be a brat."

"Don't know how else to be," she said looking over her shoulder and giving him the same look that haunted his dreams.

He leaned over her, his hand moving to her breast, his fingers pulling the metal bar in her nipple, his other hand tight on her stomach. God, she felt amazing. His memory was nothing compared to the real thing. He had no idea how he'd gone so long without feeling her.

"Addison, come for me..." His hand moved down to trace circles on her again, making an erotic sound come out of her. He could feel she was literally dripping wet as he glided in and out of her.

"Faster..." she moaned, feeling herself getting close.

Hell yeah, he could go faster. He plunged inside her harder and faster than felt her clamping down on him as she reached her climax. "Jesus, I forgot how damn good that felt."

His own climax came soon after as he thrust hard, moving until he was spent. Staying inside her, he bent, wrapping his arms around her waist. Breathing heavily he held her close, his face resting against her back. He kissed her shoulder then stood straight, pulling her up with him as he slid out of her. He turned her to face him then kissed her almost desperately. "Addison...I…"

She wrapped her arms around his neck as she started to cry. "I...I can't do this..." She pushed away and pulled her pants back up. "I'm… I'm sorry…" she turned around and ran off back towards the bus.

Her eyes were filled with tears as she ran back towards the bus. Years of closing herself off to feeling anything, destroyed in a single moment. The feel of his lips on hers, his hands moving across her body, him moving powerfully inside her…

"Woah!" Bucky said as she almost ran into him.

She blinked away her tears as he held her. "I'm so sorry, Bucky… I can't do this… I'm sorry…."

"Deep breaths..." he said rubbing her back. "What's going on."

"I need to play...or write...or….FUCK! All I have is my fucking bass!" she was nearing a panic attack.

Bucky lowered his voice further. "Addie-loo… you need to breathe..."

The use of his old nickname for her distracted her enough for her breathing to start to regulate.

"That's my girl..." he smiled. "There's a piano backstage…"

She sniffled and looked up at him. "Do you think they would mind if I went in and used it for a little while?"

"Will it help with all this?" he asked waving his hand around her.

"Usually does."

He looked around, making sure no one was around. "Adds, I know this has been hard. I know how difficult being on stage is for you. But please… give it another shot. I need this."

She wiped her eyes and nodded. "I know, B...I just need to get my head on straight."

He placed a gentle kiss on top of her head. "You've got about an hour until we need to start setting up for soundchecks… Use it however you need."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome…. Now let's go see if we can get you in there early."

.

* * *

Addison made her way through the dark hallway towards the rehearsal space, using her phone as a flashlight. The moment she saw the piano she let out a sigh of relief. She sat down and opened the lid. The feel of the cold ivory under her fingertips instantly comforting her. She played a few scales out of habit before cracking her knuckles and starting to play a melody. The notes flowed effortlessly through her. By the third time, words began to form in her mind. With a shaky breath, she started to sing.

"Help, I lost myself again  
But I remember you  
Don't come back, it won't end well  
But I wish you'd tell me too

Our love is six feet under  
I can't help but wonder  
If our grave was watered by the rain  
Would roses bloom?  
Could roses bloom  
Again?

Retrace my lips  
Erase your touch  
It's all too much for me  
Blow away  
Like smoke in air  
How can you die carelessly?

Our love is six feet under  
I can't help but wonder  
If our grave was watered by the rain  
Would roses bloom?  
Could roses bloom?

They're playing our sound  
Laying us down tonight  
And all of these clouds  
Crying us back to life  
But you're cold as a knife

Six feet under  
I can't help but wonder  
If our grave was watered by the rain  
Bloom  
Bloom  
Again

Help, I lost myself again  
But I remember you..."

She smiled sadly to herself.

"I kissed a girl and I liked it, the taste of her cherry chapstick..." Addison rolled her eyes. "Fucking Katie Perry..." she pulled out her phone and answered it. "Have I ever told you how much I despise the ringtone you picked?"

"You know you love me," Bree giggled from the other end of the line.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah."

"Sorry, it took me so long to call you back. My brother was in town and it was just a whole thing, and then work was crazy..."

Addison cracked a small smile. "Bree...it's fine..."

"But you sounded so upset on the message. Is everything okay?"

She huffed out a breath. "Everything is a whole hell of a long way from okay right now."

"Did Bucky already piss you off? I swear, just when I think you two are finally getting along….What did that idiot do now?"

"Bucky didn't do anything...unless you consider dragging me on a tour where one of the members of the other band is my ex-boyfriend."

Bree was silent for a moment. "You don't do boyfriends..."

"I did..."

Addison heard a loud gasp and then the sound of Bree's phone hitting the ground. A second later she was back. "No fucking way?!"

"Way."

"Zed?"

"The one and only"

"How the ever-living fuck?! I thought your brother wanted to kill him? Why the hell would he even be managing him, much less have you anywhere near him?"

"He doesn't know they're the same person." The line was silent again.

"Girl, how?"

She let out a humorless laugh. "He's using a fake last name."

"And you're using his real one."

"Ironic… isn't it."

"But still! How does he not know?"

"Because when Z and I were dating, Bucky still didn't know if he was going to make his bones and join the family. I wasn't about to risk him going after Zed. You know how protective Bucky could get… There's a reason I didn't keep pictures out in the open."

"That's just… wow..." Bree was silent for another moment before she let out a loud sigh. "Addison… You know I love you… right?"

"Yeah..."

"Good, so don't take offense to this next question… Have you slept with him"

"...We didn't sleep..."

"Jesus Adds! It's only been 2 days! Did you just jump on top of him the first second you were alone with him?"

"No! … it was the third time we were alone..."

"ADDIE!"

"What? I can't

help it! It's Zed! I've never been able to control myself around him! You know this!"

"But that was BEFORE he knocked you up, cheated on you, moved to the opposite end of the country, broke up with you through a fucking letter, basically admitting to using you to get into school...shall I continue?"

Addison let out a small sniffle. "I know."

Bree sighed sadly. "But he's still Zed."

"Yeah...he's still Zed." They were silent for a moment. "He joined the military."

"WHAT?"

"Yeah..."

"Why, how, when?"

"I don't know."

"I swear you two..." Bree mumbled under her breath. "Does he know about..."

"No..."

"Are you going to tell him?"

"What's the point?" She dropped her head onto the piano and started to cry. "Bree… I can't do this… I can't be around him every fucking minute of every fucking day… It hurts...so much," she said wiping her eyes. "But I can't leave… Bucky needs me… He did so much for me after..."

"I know."

Addison sighed loudly. "What am I going to do?"

"You're going to remember that you are Addison Fucking Donnelly. Yes, you've been through hell, but you are still a badass, hotter than Hades, rock goddess."

She scoffed. "Yeah… with crippling anxiety who can't even look up from her bass without wanting to vomit and pass the fuck out."

"Fake it til you make it babe."

"Yeah.."

"Send me your tour schedule."

"Why?"

"Because I'm going to come to see you for your birthday, duh."

"You don't have to do that, Bree."

"Um, yes… I do. Besides, I'm going to need to re-bleach your roots."

"Fine. I'll talk to Bucky and ask him for the schedule."

"You don't know where you're playing this month?"

Addison let out a humorless laugh. "Nope...again, what does it matter."

"Yeah...I'm definitely coming to visit..." They were silent for another moment. "I ran into Mason yesterday."

"Bree…" Addison warned.

"I didn't say a word about you… Don't worry… Even though I think it's fucking stupid."

"So you've told me…. A few thousand times."

"And yet you still don't listen to me… "

"Yeah, yeah, yeah..." Addison looked up at the sounds of footsteps to see her step-brother walking towards her. "Hey, Bucky… Bree wants to know our schedule."

He held out his hand for the phone. Addison rolled her eyes but handed it to him anyway.

"Hey, Bree… I'll send you an email with all the upcoming tour dates on one condition…." he rolled his eyes at whatever was said on the other end. "Yes, I'm watching out for her. And don't think I'm not pissed that you didn't tell me she lost more weight."

"Why are you so obsessed about that?!"

He held his finger up and pressed it against her lips to keep her quiet.

"No, can you bring a couple of her guitars with you when you come?" he nodded his head and looked over to Addison.

"Bree says she's already got your stuff put into storage, but she'll grab whatever you want."

Addison's eyes lit up. She reached over and grabbed the phone back. "Thank you! Can you grab my Hummingbird and my '84 Les Paul?"

"English for us non-music nerds please?" Bree laughed.

She rolled her eyes again. "The Gibson rosewood acoustic with the flowers and hummingbird on it, and the cherry red electric I got when we graduated."

"Wasn't that easier?"

"Not really..."

"Whatevs… are you going to be okay?"

Addison looked up to Bucky who gave her an encouraging smile.

"I'm alright right now… Thanks for the pep-talk and for my guitars."

Bucky snatched the phone back. "And remember, her name is Casey and you don't know me… but would you mind cutting my hair while you're here?" He laughed at Bree's response. "See you soon." He hung up the phone and handed it back to Addison. "So… how are you feeling?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Still hating you for making me do this… but I'll survive."

He let out a loud sigh of relief. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Look, if things start getting too much… you can talk to Eliza. She knows everything."

"You told your girlfriend?"

"Yeah… she can be very, um… persuasive..."

"Eww, B… I don't want to know about your sex life."

"At least you've never walked in on me with anyone."

She rolled her eyes. "That was like seven years ago. Get over it."

"No can do, sis… There are some things you just can't bleach out of your brain." He pulled her into a hug and ruffled her hair. "Come on, let's get everything set up… you guys are headlining tonight."

* * *

Another show done. Addison was exhausted, mentally, physically, emotionally. She went through the motions during the meet and greet after. She flirted and flaunted, ignoring Zed's continuous attempts to get her attention. When she'd finally put in the bare minimum amount of time, she made her way back to the bus, collapsing into her bunk.

She had only been in there for a few minutes when she heard Stacey outside of her bunk.

"Hey, Casey...can we talk?"

Addison opened her bunk curtain to find Stacey standing there looking nervous. "Sure." She grabbed her phone and cigarettes and followed her off the bus and into the cool night air.

"I just wanted to warn you. Lacey is pissed the fuck off with you," Stacey said as they leaned against the side of the bus.

"What? Why?"

Stacey rolled her eyes, clearly not sharing Lacey's feelings. "The whole tattoo thing this afternoon and then whatever the hell that was in the green room… she thinks you were flirting with Zed."

"But I..."

"Look, I get it. He's hot. No one is immune to his charms...Trust me."

"You?"

She nodded her head. "If Lacey ever found out..."

Addison held her hand up. "I swear, I won't tell her."

Stacey noticeably relaxed. "Thank you...I still can't believe I did...especially with what just happened with Macey."

"Wait, this was recent?"

Stacey nodded again. "Yeah...actually it was just last night after the show. I want to blame it on post-show endorphins, but I can't."

Addison internally screamed and cursed, but kept calm and collected on the outside.

"Look, Zed has slept with or fooled around with EVERY member of the band..."

"Wait...even Tracey?"

"Only once...much to Tracey's dismay," she laughed.

"Who's full of surprises now..." Addison mumbled under her breath.

"What?"

"Nothing..." she said waving it off.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is, if it happens, it's fine. But be careful. If Lacey finds out..."

Addison held her hands up. "Enough said. I'll stay clear of him."

"Speak of the devil..." Stacey whispered making Addison look up. Zed was making his way across the parking lot towards the bus. "I'm heading back in… It's going to be at least a few days until I trust myself around him… the best sex ever!" she giggled before opening the door and walking back in.

Zed caught Addison's eye and motioned towards the side of the venue. She took a deep drag on her cigarette and followed. The second she made the corner, he pulled her to him and kissed her.

She moaned into his mouth before remembering herself. She pushed him away. "No..."

He looked at her, confusion clear on his face. "What?"

She took a step back from him. "We can't..."

"But earlier..."

"Earlier was a fucking mistake," she snapped. "It won't happen again."

"Is this because of Bucky? I saw you two together earlier… he called you Addie and was holding you..."

"What..." she shook her head. "No...This is because I don't fucking trust you!"

"I gave you every chance to stop earlier!"

"I can't trust myself either! So… just stay away from me. Don't talk to me, don't look at me..."

"That's how it's going to be?"

"Yeah, Zed...that's how it has to be..."

"What the fuck ever, Addison..." he mumbled under his breath as he stormed off.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **** Drama, drama, drama… Let's see if they can stay away from each other!**

**I'll be posting the inspiration pics for some of their tattoos on my IG page soon!**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**Six Feet Under- Billie Eilish**


	13. Stitches

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

* * *

**Chapter 13**

**STITCHES**

Addison silently cursed under her breath as she watched him walk angrily across the emptying parking lot. Her body screamed for her to follow him and take it all back, her heart begged for her to stay and spare it anymore hurt, and her head tried to reconcile the two. Yes, he used her. Yes, he cheated on her. Yes, he made her fall in love with him just to break her heart into a million pieces. But earlier that day… the tattoos, the things he said… None of it made sense. She leaned her head against the cold brick wall and let out a shaky breath. Even after everything he had done, all that she had been through since, he still owned every beat of her heart.

"Hey, Casey!"

She opened her eyes to see Tracey standing in front of her. She cracked a weak smile. "Hey, Tracey."

"Whatchya doing?" he asked, his eyes wide with excitement as he bounced from foot to foot.

She held up her cigarette for him to see before bringing it to her lips for a drag.

"Well hurry up and finish! We're going to be taking off soon and I've had this idea running through my head since we got here and I want us all to work on it tonight!"

"I think I should probably keep my distance from Lacey for a little bit," she mumbled.

"She'll get over it. She thinks EVERYONE is flirting with Zed." His smile widened. "I mean, to be fair, most people are… but it's not like she has a claim on him, like at all!"

"What's the deal with that anyway? I know Bucky said they were a thing and then there was something about a song?"

Tracey rolled his eyes. "First off, saying they were 'A thing' is a bit of an exaggeration."

Her eyebrows rose. "Care to spill the tea?"

His eyes lit up. "OMG! Please tell me we can gossip? I live for it, and… let's just say Lacey isn't one to let me talk her ear off. Stacey is great, but her and Macey were besties and we've just never been as close, and..."

Addison started to laugh. "Tracey, we can definitely gossip. I could use a distraction or ten or fifty… anything to get out of my own head right now, really."

He clapped his hands excitedly and grabbed her arm, pulling her down to the ground to sit. "Okay, so we all came up in the New York music scene together. Played the same venues, shared a lot of the same fans," he waved his hands, "I'm sure you know how it is… Anyway, as anyone with half-decent eyesight can tell, Zed is quite the looker."

Addison couldn't help but scoff.

"You disagree?"

"I didn't say that..."

"I didn't think so..." Tracey smiled again. "Okay, so once Lacey sets her mind on something, that's it. She doesn't stop until she gets what she wants. And Zed had her attention from the second she saw him on stage… Believe it or not, she used to be a lot of fun. But… ever since the Zed incident, she's changed." He looked around to make sure they were completely alone. "We were all out one night and we ran into Bonzo and Eliza. Zed wasn't with them. Lacey started asking questions and eventually managed to find out that he was at home alone. Well… she decided she was going to make her move. She left us at the bar and I didn't see her or hear from her for two days. Which is crazy because I live with her."

"Oh god...I'm so sorry, Tracey..."

He bit back a laugh before he continued. "Anywho. By the time she came back to our flat she was already mentally making their gift registry and picking out china patterns."

"Must have been a hell of a couple of days."

"According to Lacey. Zed tells it much differently."

"Oh really?"

Tracey nodded his head. "I love her like a sister, but I also know how she can be… she says it was two days of pure bliss, he says it was two days of hell where he kept trying to get her to leave. How she ever thought that boy could be tied down is beyond me."

Addison bit her lip to keep herself from telling him that Zed actually enjoyed a bit of rope play every now and then. Instantly her mind was filled with memories of him on his knees in front of her, arms tied behind him, fully submissive. She took a deep breath trying to clear her head, only for images of herself trussed up with intricate knots formed across her body as Zed looked down on her with a wicked smiled playing on his lips, to replace it. "So…" she said, trying to get her mind off of its current torturous course. "Where does this song thing come into play?"

"Ah yes… the song… So when she came back to the apartment she kept going on and on about how 'inspiring' the whole thing had been and that she has this song that we need to work on immediately. So we all get together at our rehearsal spot and work through what she wrote. I'll give it to her, it was a damn good song. Probably the best thing we've ever put together..." he sighed and looked up to her. "That next weekend we're out and Zombies is playing. Well… you can imagine our surprise when the song we had just spent the better part of the week working on is being performed on stage."

Addison gasped.

"Yup...and that's when the bad blood started. Lacey caused this HUGE scene, actually got escorted out. Bucky had to talk management out of calling the cops..."

"Damn..."

"Girl...it was insane. She was screaming and throwing things… Kept going on and on about how they were in love and she couldn't believe he could do that to her. He called her every name in the book and said something about loving someone else… I don't know… None of it made ANY sense whatsoever… Bucky met with both of them the next day. Since neither of them was budging on who actually wrote the song, no one gets to perform it. And if either of them does, Bucky will drop them."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

Addison looked around before leaning in closer. "Since we're sharing juicy secrets… I have to ask... You and Zed?"

Tracey threw his head back and laughed. "That is another story for another night." He stood up and helped her to her feet.

"Awww…" she pretended to pout before hip checking him. "Please?… I'll let you have first dibs on my shoes for the next show..."

He laughed again and draped his arm around her shoulders. "Casey, I have a feeling this is the start of a beautiful friendship!"

* * *

"Who the hell does she think she is?" Zed mumbled to himself as he shoved his hands back into his pockets and kicked at an empty bottle in his path. "Can't trust me? What the fuck is that?"

He turned down another dark alley. He knew the anger building inside would be short-lived. It always was. After the anger would come the soul-crushing pain. He couldn't handle it. After he was kicked out of Julliard he had the army to keep him from going down that dark path. But after the army… escaping became more and more difficult.

Shooting up again now would be like visiting an old friend he hadn't seen in a while; a volatile and temperamental friend to be sure, but a faithful one. One that would keep the nightmares at bay. One that would make visions of blue tear-filled eyes vanish.

He slumped down onto the dirty ground and removed his jacket, rolling up his shirt sleeve. This was the good stuff, the gingery kind that took you down smooth and slow. He tied the tourniquet around his arm, holding it tight with his teeth as his veins became visible. He punctured his skin with the needle. All he needed to do was push down on the plunger and sweet euphoria would wash over him.

* * *

"Where the hell is he?!" Bucky yelled to Bonzo and Eliza as they stood outside the tour bus. "We were supposed to be on the road over an hour ago!"

"We told you, we don't know!" Eliza said for the fifteenth time. "We haven't seen him since we were backstage. He's not answering his phone."

"If he's not back here in the next thirty minutes, we're leaving. He can find his own fucking way to the next show." He punched the side of the bus before going back in. He stormed down the narrow hall and into the back room where the Acey's were all congregated. "At least you're all here," he mumbled as he pushed past Addison to get a bottle of water from the fridge.

"Everything okay?" she asked over the top of the door.

Bucky stood back up and closed the refrigerator. "Do any of you know where Zed is?"

Lacey rolled her eyes. "Don't know, don't care… he can drop dead as far as I'm concerned."

"Real nice, Lacey..."

"What?" she smiled innocently.

"Speaking of Zed…" Tracey smiled, "so after that little show and tell this afternoon, I started writing..." he grabbed his guitar and started to play.

"Go on and take it off  
Take it off!  
Shake it off baby, for me  
C'mon and break me off  
Break me off!  
Cause I get what I want and I like what I see..."

He continued to play a riff before he looked up to Lacey. "I could use your help on the verses… something fun… like we used to write."

"Fun, huh?"

Tracey nodded excitedly.

She finished off her scotch on the rocks and smiled. "Fine...fun… play me in." She listened as he played the tune.

"I'm on my second drink  
But I've had a few before  
I'm tryin' hard to think  
And I think that I want you on the floor  
Uh-huh, yeah on the floor!"

"Oh my God! I love it!" he laughed as he scribbled it down into his notebook. "Casey! Jump in!" he said as he picked up his guitar and started to play again.

"Um, excuse me?!" Lacey snapped looking between Tracey and Addison. "I don't fucking think so." She pointed at Addison. "Your job is to play bass, not write songs." She looked back at Tracey. "And you… the only reason you're even allowed to write and sing is because we've been friends since Kindergarten… don't push your luck…" She looked over to Stacey, "Stay in your fucking lane, too."

"What did I do?" Stacey asked, twirling a drumstick between her fingers.

Lacey rolled her eyes and took a step back looking at all of them. "You all seem to forget who runs this show. I'm the lead here. Me. I say what goes and what doesn't."

"Well then maybe you should start writing!" Bucky snapped.

"Excuse me? What did you just say?"

"You're a band, Lacey. Together. The four of you. Start acting like it! I want everyone writing...Got it!"

They all heard something hit the side of the bus hard followed by Bonzo's voice.

"Joy…" Lacey said with a heavy eye roll and sarcasm dripping in her voice. "He's back." She looked over to Tracey. "Let's finish OUR song."

.

* * *

"Fucking voice mail again!" Eliza growled. "Zed! Get your ass back here or I swear to God when I find you I am going to shove a drum stick so far up..."

"There he is!" Bonzo said pointing towards the entrance of the parking lot.

Eliza hung up the phone and shoved it into her pocket. "Thank god… he's at least upright."

"Cut him some slack, E… Maybe he just needed some fresh air."

"Bonz… It's been less than a year. Statistically speaking..."

"E! Enough. I don't give a shit about statistics. He's not using."

"Are you willing to risk everything to back that up?"

"I am."

"Fine… But I swear..."

"I know… I'll talk to him."

She rolled her eyes but didn't say anything else. When he finally made his way over to them, she pulled him into a hug. "I love you. Don't disappear on us, again," she whispered into his ear before pulling back and walking onto the bus.

Before Zed could say anything Bonzo grabbed him by the shoulders of his leather jacket and slammed him against the side of the bus. "Where the fuck were you?"

Zed cringed at the sudden impact but relished the pain. "Needed fresh air."

"Do not fuck around with me Z…"

"I'm not! Look at my eyes! You'd be able to fucking tell!"

Bonzo looked into his eyes. Sure enough, his pupils were normal size. He loosened up his grip and exhaled loudly. "I'm sorry… I was just worried you had… you know..."

"It's fine… I almost did."

"You did?"

Zed pushed his jacket sleeve up and showed him the puncture in his arm.

"Fucking Christ, Z! Why?!"

"I needed to feel something...anything... other than this..."

"What stopped you?"

"The same thing I was trying to escape… Her..."

Bonzo gave him a strange look.

"I've worked too damn hard to put my life back together..." he whispered quietly. "I sat there, needle in my arm, and all I could think about was her… and I fucking hated her for driving me back to that shit… and I fucking hated the thought that she'd ever see me like that… and… and… FUCK!" his hands grabbed at the ends of his hair in frustration as he sighed heavily. "I thought I had her back. I was willing to forget that she ripped my heart out and cut me off. I thought for just a minute that she still loved me and that everything in that letter was a lie… But I was wrong."

"Dude, H is not the answer."

"I know… But Bonz… I can't help that I still love her. I hate her… but I still love her."

"So take that hate and anger, and..."

"Lust, love, confusion..." Zed added.

Bonzo chuckled. "Yeah, all that shit...but take those feelings and make something from them. You're a fucking musician… Use it. Unrequited love makes the best fucking songs, man."

Zed cracked a small smile. "You up for an all-nighter?"

"I am if you are."

* * *

Zed threw his headphones off and looked behind him to where Eliza was sitting at her small electric drum kit, "I think we've got it." He took his shirt off and used it to wipe the sweat from his face.

She pulled her headphones off and smiled. "This is so badass."

Bucky looked up from his phone. "Well...Let's hear it."

"What about the Acey's in the back? Aren't they working too?" Bonzo asked. They all had an understanding. Headphones only while they were working.

Bucky waved him off. "I'm pissed off at Lacey almost as much as I'm pissed off at this one," he said motioning over to Zed. "I've heard most of the song they were working on, now I want to hear what you three came up with."

Zed smiled and plugged into the amp.

"If it stayed I'd never leave it  
If that turned around  
I'd grieve the special dirty things that we used to talk about  
I mean that loving you is strange  
And adored by me throughout, oh no it's you again…

Someday soon you'll find that someone  
Waiting for the chance to beat you  
Drooling on the set to feel you  
Blessing you with every kiss..."

The volume kicked up as they tore into the chorus. The heavy rhythms shaking the windows.

"Tying yourself to me  
Stitch up my emptiness cause you're the death of me  
So precious loving the thrill  
Tying yourself to me  
Stitch up my emptiness cause you're the death of me  
So precious loving the thrill..."

"What the hell is going on! We're trying to work!" Lacey screamed over the music as she and the rest of The Acey's walked into the front room. She looked over to Bucky for back-up but he just held his finger over his lips to tell her to be quiet.

Addison's mouth ran dry. Zed. Shirtless. Guitar… Her eyes focused on the way his muscles moved as he played. She licked her bottom lip and pulled it between her teeth.

"Such the patient one who needs me  
The spoiled one who wins  
So shocking where's your sense  
Don't you know I hate you, oh oh  
Unsatisfied, you little girl..."

Her head snapped up as she processed the lyrics. He was staring at her. The venom in his voice made her breath catch. "Holy shit he's pissed," she thought to herself.

"Tying yourself to me  
Stitch up my emptiness cause you're the death of me  
So precious loving the thrill  
Tying yourself to me  
Stitch up my emptiness cause you're the death of me  
So precious loving the thrill..."

Zed watched her as she listened. He poured every ounce of pain and confusion into the lyrics. He knew she knew the song was about her. He knew he should break eye contact before everyone else realized it as well, but he couldn't.

"I mean that fucking you is strange  
And adored by me throughout  
Oh no it's you again  
Blessing you with every kiss

So precious you know this hate of mine exploded  
I'm so deranged you know  
I will never be the same

Tying yourself to me  
Stitch up my emptiness cause you're the death of me  
So precious loving the thrill  
Tying yourself to me  
Stitch up my emptiness cause you're the death of me  
So precious loving the thrill."

As they ripped into the instrumentals he kept his eyes locked on hers. Her fists were clenched, her breathing was heavy, her lips were parted. She looked just as conflicted as he felt. With the final chord, he threw her a wink.

Addison inhaled sharply. She turned on her heels and took off towards the back room. If they hadn't been on a bus traveling 70mph on the interstate, she would have walked out the door. She needed air. She needed clarity. She needed an escape. She settled for tequila.

* * *

She knew she was dreaming. She'd seen this all before. The hot sun beating down on her as she lounged on the top deck of the stark white villa overlooking the dazzling water of the Mediterranean.

"Five years from now… where are we?" Zed asked as he ran his hand through her long blonde hair.

She placed a kiss on his bare chest and looked up into his eyes. "Co-headlining a major tour, selling out arenas, playing our hearts out for millions of adoring fans…" She giggled and kissed him. "Definitely more nude sunbathing… I wonder if I could buy this place… How much do you think real estate in Santorini goes for?"

He let out a soft laugh. "You don't dream small do you?"

"Nope. That's why you love me."

"One of the many..."

"What about you?" she asked, sitting up and straddling him. "Where do you see us in five years?"

He squinted, looking up at her. "You really want to know?"

She giggled and leaned down to kiss him. "I wouldn't have asked if I didn't."

"No bullshit?"

"Always."

He grabbed her left hand and placed a soft kiss on her ring finger.

Letting out a sigh, she rolled her eyes. "You know my stance on the M-word."

Zed nodded his head. "I also knew your stance on the L-word…."

"You won that one… you should quit while you're ahead Jacobs." She giggled as he grabbed onto her ass and rolled them both over.

His hand rested on her cheek."Don't fight me, Baby. You know I'm going to win."

"But you love it when I put up a fight..." she licked her bottom lip and pulled it between her teeth.

A mischievous grin crossed his face. "Safeword is 'baklava'," he whispered as his expression darkened.

Addison giggled in anticipation as his hand moved from her face down to her throat. He leaned over, squeezing slightly but not constricting her airflow. She reached up to place her hands on his shoulders, but he gathered both her wrists and slammed her hands against the chaise above her head.

"I'm going to fuck you hard, and you're going to love it…" He grabbed her breasts roughly, still holding her wrists above her head. "I don't care how many times you beg me to stop..."

"How hard do you want me to fight back?" she asked breathlessly.

"As hard as you can, Baby..."

She shuddered a moan and closed her eyes. She twisted her hands until they were free of his grip and then shoved at his chest.

His eyes widened for a second before he smiled. "Is that all you got?" He grabbed her hands and held them out to her sides.

She twisted and turned under him, but he was lying on top of her, preventing most of her movements. He pressed his mouth to hers- hard- and she could feel his tongue up against hers. She continued to struggle weakly under him as he pulled back and placed his hand over her throat again.

"I'm so in love with you…"

"Love me later… Right now, make me yours..."

"You're topping from the bottom again..." he licked the side of her face while he applied ever so slightly more pressure against her throat.

Addison brought her legs up and tried to pull her knees together to kick him off, but he was too fast. He grabbed one leg and held it down while his other hand grabbed her hip. He flipped her over onto her stomach and quickly grabbed her hands again.

He held them together at the small of her back and pushed her face down on the chaise lounge. He pushed her thighs apart with his knees.

She tried to struggle again, but it was hard to move at all with her hands pinned behind her. She loved feeling how strong he was. She felt his fingers between her legs and then inside of her.

"I knew you'd be wet," he breathed into her ear.

She bit back another moan as she heard him opening a condom with his teeth.

He positioned himself and slammed into her. The force of his penetration causing her to slide forward, but he pulled back on her hip, keeping her in place.

Her hip throbbed where his fingers dug into her flesh. Her shoulders strained against the awkward position. Her knees ached as he pounded into her over and over again. Every muscle becoming fatigued as she tried to shift herself away from him. All the while, her body tingled and her clit throbbed at the sensations. Even as she tried to dislodge him, her body screamed for more. Though the safeword was fresh in her mind, she had no desire to use it.

"Zed!" she cried out, only to receive a sharp smack on her backside.

"Shut up and take it."

His words were enough to take her over the edge. She stilled her movements and held her breath as the orgasm swept through her in a flood of sensation. When she was able to breathe again, she nearly collapsed.

Zed wrapped an arm around her torso, slowing his movements as he leaned across her back and breathed hot air against her neck. "I'm not done with you yet..."

Her exhausted smile widened as he grabbed both of her ankles, pulling them out from under her. She could feel his tight grip on her shoulder right before he flipped her over and covered her body with his.

"No!" She shoved at him, arching her back and twisting her hips.

He grabbed the back of her head, twisting his fingers into her hair, and pulled back sharply. His legs covered hers, and his other hand grasped her throat.

"No more of that," he said harshly. "You're going to do what I say, or you are going to regret it."

She tried to struggle, but he had her completely pinned. He tightened the grip on her hair.

"You ready to obey now?"

She couldn't move her head, so she glanced down to look at his face. She knew she could use the safeword now if she wanted to, but nothing about this made her want to stop. Her skin was tingling, and the feeling of his weight on her was causing her body to throb with anticipation. She loved this game.

"There's no escaping, Addie..."

She closed her eyes and swallowed hard. She nodded and much as she could. When she opened her eyes again, she smiled. "Yes, sir..."

"That's a good girl." Zed released her and leaned back on his heels. "Now get back on your knees and spread those legs."

Slowly she rolled herself over and pulled her knees in. She placed her hands on the seat below her, fingers spread and moved her legs apart. She could feel his hand on the back of her neck, pushing her down until her head was against the seat as well.

"This...is...mine!" He slammed into her, jarring her forward. He didn't pull back, but pushed forward, grinding into her until she was screaming his name again. Her body convulsed, tightening around his cock as he ground into her over and over.

"Zed! Zed! Zed!" she cried out again as another wave hit her. She almost collapsed, but he held her hips as he began to thrust again, harder and faster than before.

She felt sweat dripping onto her back. Her knees shaking and her arms aching, but the feeling was incredible. Every sense heightened. She felt as if every nerve in her body was firing all at once. Her head spinning, and he continued on.

Zed suddenly cried out, painfully tightening his grip on her hips as he comes. A moment later, they both dropped to the chaise lounge in a pile of sweat, completely exhausted.

"Holy shit, Adds..." Zed rolled to his back and placed his hand on his chest, breathing hard. "That was a workout."

She giggled and leaned over to kiss him. "For me, too."

"You put up a hell of a fight," he grinned as he pulled her in to deepen the kiss.

"I told you you love it..."

"And you love it when I take control."

She let out a quiet giggle. "I do… but when we get our energy back, it's my turn… and you mister… are in serious trouble."

His eyes lit up. "Promise?"

"I'm pretty sure there's some extra rope down on the boat… I hope you remember that safeword."

"God do I love you…. Forever."

"And after..." she whispered as his lips came down onto hers.

* * *

Her eyes shot open. "Just a dream..." she whispered to herself. "A really, really good fucking dream..." She reached for her phone to check the time. Nine in the morning. She rolled her eyes. They hadn't called it a night until nearly five, but after that subconscious trip down memory lane, she knew she wouldn't be able to fall back asleep. With a heavy sigh, she opened the curtains of her bunk and climbed down, quietly making her way towards the kitchen in the back of the bus.

"Morning, Princess."

Addison jumped and turned around to see Eliza sitting at the kitchen booth.

"Oh!" she startled. "I didn't expect anyone else to be up yet."

Eliza shrugged. "Haven't gone to bed yet… Figured at this point I might as well just stay up. You?"

She grabbed the bottle of tequila from the cabinet. "Trying to chase off a dream."

"Nightmare?"

"Worse, a good one."

"Care to explain?"

"Bad dreams I'm used to. Good dreams… they give you hope. And hope is a dangerous thing." She unscrewed the cap and took a large swig. "So, what's up with the 'Princess' nickname? It can't just be because of the hair."

"Because I suck at lying and I'm worried I'll slip and call you Addison in front of everyone." She stood up and walked over, taking the tequila bottle from her. "How about you grab a cup of coffee and we talk for a little while. I've been hoping we would get the chance ever since Bucky told me you were joining the tour."

"I'd like that."

Eliza opened the cabinet next to them and grabbed a mug, handing it to her.

"Thanks," Addison whispered as she poured herself a cup. "So… you and my brother?"

"Yup. I'm sure he's told you that it's very much on the DL."

"Was that your choice or his?"

"His," Eliza stated matter of factly. "I mean, I get it. He's trying to build his business."

"And you're okay with it?"

She shrugged. "I get to see him every day. And we try to spend alone time together. But..." she smiled sadly.

"Not much privacy on a bus."

"Exactly," she laughed quietly as they both sat down in the booth across from one another.

"I don't know how you two do it. I mean, not like I do the whole 'relationship' thing, but when I did…" she sighed wistfully. "Yeah, there would have been no way we could have kept things quiet."

"Bucky may have mentioned something about walking in on you and a boy in high-school… He was quite traumatized."

Addison laughed and rolled her eyes. "He really needs to get over that."

"I don't think he ever will. He's very protective of you."

"Trust me. I know."

"He talks about you all the time. At first, I thought it was weird, you know… because you guys aren't really related and you were only step-siblings for a couple of years..."

"And we weren't even close then," Addison added.

"So he's said," she smiled. "But, after he told me everything… I get it. You two went through a lot together… and blood doesn't necessarily make family."

"That's for damn sure."

"You know it really means a lot to him that you're on this tour, right?"

"He was in a bind, and… I owe him."

"I didn't mean as a replacement for Macie. He loves you, and he worries about you."

"I've told him a hundred times he doesn't need to worry. I'm fine."

Eliza took a sip of her coffee as she contemplated her next words. She set the cup down and looked at Addison. "I know I've only heard Bucky's version of what happened, and I'm sure there's a whole hell of a lot that he doesn't know… but, if you ever need to talk to anyone… I know we just met and all… but… I'm here."

Addison looked around uncomfortably. "Thanks..." She took a sip of her coffee, desperate to change the subject. "So… how did you and B get together?"

Eliza smiled wide. "Luck."

"Luck?"

She nodded her head. "I've always just been lucky. I get a feeling, follow it, and it works out."

"Ooooook..."

Eliza laughed. "Follow me on this one… So I didn't pick up a pair of drumsticks until I started at MIT."

Addison almost spit out her coffee. "You went to MIT?"

"Yeah."

"How the hell did you end up in New York? With the band? With Bucky? I have so many questions!"

She let out a laugh. "Like I said...Luck…" she shrugged before continuing. "I happened to be out in town shopping before the start of my second year. I walked past a music store and just got this feeling that I should walk in. So I did. The second my eyes landed on that pearl kit… I knew I needed to learn how to play. So I did. It started with me just playing to blow off steam, but the more I played the more I loved it. School had been my everything… and suddenly it wasn't. I kept getting this feeling that I needed to follow a new path. So… with two weeks left of my last year, I walked out of class, packed my shit and hopped a bus to New York."

"That's crazy!" Addison smiled.

"Best thing I ever did. I was in town for less than a day when I met Bonz and Z. They happened to be looking for a drummer. They took me in. Let me crash at their place… We started jamming together and we just clicked… I'm an only child and those two instantly became the brothers I've always wanted. They drive me insane! But I love them fiercely." She smiled and took another sip of her coffee. "Two weeks after we officially formed Zombies, we met Bucky... and a year later he finally asked me out. We've been together ever since."

"Wow..."

Eliza shrugged. "Like I said. Luck."

"I can't

get over the fact that my idiot brother actually asked you out. The only person more anti-relationship than me was him!" she laughed. "Although, to be fair, it was because he was too chicken shit to ask anyone out."

Eliza laughed. "So he's said… did you really set him up with Frances Bean Cobain for prom?"

Addison slapped her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing too loudly. "Oh my god, I almost forgot about that one!"

"So it's true?!"

She nodded her head, still trying to hold in her laughter.

"How in the..."

"You have to understand, B did not fit in AT ALL in LA back then. He was all New Yorker. So, I took pity on him when prom rolled around. I was already going with one of his classmates… imagine what it would have done for my reputation if my brother went dateless."

Eliza bit back a laugh. "But Frances Bean?!"

Addison shrugged. "We grew up together. My dad produced albums for her dad and mom. We were shoved together a lot as kids. Luckily, she was always pretty cool. So, I called in a favor."

"Wow… I mean, like I know Bucky said your Dad produced… but Nirvana? Hole?… That's legendary."

"And my brother became legendary at school after he showed up with her."

"I can't even imagine..."

"I might have become a school legend for the rest of that year, but this one…" They both looked up to see Bucky standing in the doorway. "kids at Seabrook High still talk about her." He walked further in and kissed Eliza. "Morning, babe." He looked over to Addison and smiled. "Hello, sister-dear."

"Brother-dear." She rolled her eyes. "And I doubt anyone remembers either of us. High school was a long time ago… if you're getting coffee, can you get me a refill?"

He took her cup from her and walked over to the coffee pot. "Well, as of my reunion they were still telling the legend of THE Addison Donnelly..."

"A cautionary tale to be sure," she mumbled.

Bucky handed her her mug and rolled his eyes. "Stop."

"What?"

"Putting yourself down… I know what you're about to say..."

"I doubt it."

He smirked. "Blah blah blah, washed up, has been, never was, never will be, blah blah blah… Did I get it close?"

She narrowed her eyes. "I hate you."

"You love me. You're just pissed I was right."

"Maybe."

"And you know I don't agree with any of it. So you've been through some shit. It's not the end of your story."

Addison stared silently into her coffee cup for a moment before standing up. "I'm sure you two would like a few moments alone. Thanks for talking with me Eliza."

"Anytime… Oh, and Princess… I have a good feeling about you being on this tour."

With a forced smile, Addison turned and walked out of the back room. She was halfway down the bunk lined hall when she collided with a hard body.

"Shit!" she yelled out as her fresh cup of hot coffee spilled down the front of the baggy sweatshirt she was wearing.

"Fuck!" Zed yelled at the same time. "I'm so sorry! I didn't look when I jumped out of bed. He frantically tried to wipe the coffee off the two of them. "Christ you're soaked..."

"I'm fine..." she said trying to swat his hands away as he tried to help.

He pulled at the bottom of her sweatshirt.

"Zed, stop, I'm..." she pleaded.

He easily slipped it off of her, only to freeze when he realized she was completely naked underneath. "Fuck..."

"I told you I was fine!" she exclaimed, trying to get past him to her bunk.

"What's all the commotion...AHHHH!" Bucky screamed clamping his hand over his eyes.

"Fuck...um..." Zed quickly ripped his own shirt off and handed it to her. "It's not what it looks like, B!"

Addison quickly pulled the t-shirt on over her head, trying to ignore the fact that it smelled like him. That combined with the dream she had had… she was quickly approaching dangerous territory. If it hadn't been for her brother standing there, she didn't know what she would have done.

"Well, then what the hell is it then?" Bucky called out, still covering his eyes.

All of the curtains seemed to open at the same time, as both bands were awoken by the commotion.

"Why are you wearing Zed's shirt?" Tracey asked sleepily.

Addison threw her hands up in the air and pushed past Zed, ignoring the urge to pull him with her. She climbed into her bunk and closed the curtains in a huff.

"I may have bumped into her and spilled her coffee all over…" Zed began to explain, only to be cut off by his shirt hitting him in the back of the head. "I was trying to help clean up… and..."

Lacey rolled her eyes. "What the fuck ever..." she stood up and pushed past him. "I don't care… And… since we're up, we might as well start practicing."

Addison threw open the curtains and climbed back out fully dressed in a tight Led Zeppelin t-shirt tied up above her waist and ripped jeans, a pair of studded Loubiton booties in her hand.

"DIBS!" Tracey shouted running up to her and taking her shoes.

"Hey! You owe me a certain story for those, you know!"

He blew her a kiss. "Later, I promise!" He looked at the shoes in his hands. "Hello, my beauties… you and I are going to have so much fun together!"

Addison rolled her eyes and stuck her head back into her bunk grabbing her Gucci coral snake flats instead.

"How many pairs of shoes do you have?" Stacey asked in shock.

Zed had to turn away and bite his tongue to keep himself from commenting, knowing full well that she owned more shoes than she could count.

"Too many..." Bucky deadpanned before he turned and walked back into the kitchen.

Addison shrugged as she twisted her hair into a top knot. "I only brought two bags of shoes with me."

"God, I wish we wore the same size," Stacey laughed as she hopped down from her bunk and walked out to join Tracey and Lacey in the front of the bus.

Bonzo stood up and stretched. "Sounds like I missed quite the show..." he winked at Addison as he walked down the hall. Zed growled low in his chest and punched his shoulder hard as he walked by.

Silence filled the narrow hallway. "Sorry about the sweatshirt..." Zed whispered as he looked nervously down to his feet.

"It's fine," she sighed. She looked around to make sure they were alone before adding in a low whisper. "It's yours anyway. Keep it."

He looked up and smiled. "I'm pretty sure possession is 9/10ths of the law. You've had it for a hell of a lot longer than I ever did. So..." he handed it back to her.

"Thanks… And thank you for the t-shirt."

He let out a quiet laugh. "Literally the least I could do… sorry I ogled."

She arched her brow. "Are you really?" she asked skeptically.

"Not in the slightest…"

"Didn't think so..." It didn't escape her that they had slowly been walking further down the hall. Their bodies instinctively drawing closer to one another. Her back was almost against the last set of bunks.

"Nice shoes by the way…" He licked his lower lip as his eyes moved up from her feet to meet hers with a look that made her insides melt. "Still have the matching thigh-highs?"

"Wouldn't you like to know..." she countered back, trying to keep her eyes from wandering down his bare chest.

He smiled coyly and shrugged.

"Casey! Are you coming or not?" Lacey called out from the front of the bus.

"Fucking, Lacey..." Zed sneered under his breath.

Addison looked up at him. "I should go..."

He put his hand upon the wall next to her, practically caging her in. "I'm sorry about last night… that song… The way I acted… I was just really pissed off..."

"Don't be sorry…" She took a breath and looked into his eyes. "It was a really good song… Tying… stitches…" she bit her lip. "Reminds me of that night we spent out on the boat in Greece..."

Zed's mouth dropped open. It took him a moment to find his voice again. "I didn't even think of that..." he whispered out hoarsely. "That night was..." his lips turned up in a smile "Amazing doesn't even come close…"

She looked to the side and ran a finger over his hand. "You still have the scar from when we slipped..."

"Okay, amazing until the end," he whispered, reveling in the feel of her hand on his. "And ten stitches tend to leave a scar…"

When their eyes met again, he could tell she was fighting back tears.

"Addison..."

She placed a finger against his lips and shook her head. She ducked down under his arm and walked off to the front of the bus where the rest of their bands were congregated.

Zed turned himself around and rested his head against the wall she had just been standing against and let out a deep breath, needing at least a temporary reprieve from the emotional whiplash. He didn't know how he was going to survive this tour. One second he hated her, the next he wanted nothing more than to hold her, and then the next he wanted to screw her brains out. Life was certainly more complicated with her around.

"Zed… a word?" Bucky said walking back into the hall.

He turned his head towards Bucky. "What's up?"

* * *

Zed slumped onto one of the benches in the front of the bus.

"What the hell's got you so pissy?" Bonzo asked from next to him. "Is this because you didn't get any ass last night?"

Zed rolled his eyes and punched him on the shoulder again. "No… but I did just get an ass-chewing." He looked up to see Bucky walking into the room.

"Hey, Bucky!" Bonzo called out above all the chatter from everyone else. "I gotta get some tonight. How about we stop off at a strip club after the show? We'll pick up some girls, do our thing, and then get on the road."

Lacey looked up. "You are not bringing skank ho's on this tour bus to fuck."

Zed cracked a smile. "If the bus is a skank-ho-free zone, then you'll have to leave too, Lacey."

"Zed..." Bucky warned in a threatening tone, deflecting Lacey's volcanic reaction.

"Come one, Bucky!" Bonzo tossed his hands up in the air. "Z and I are used to fucking two or three women a day. If I don't lay some pipe soon, I might lose my motivation.

And you can't afford that..." He looked over to Zed for backup, but received a middle finger instead.

Bucky stirred his coffee. "There are other people on the bus to consider. I don't want to hear you banging girls, either. It's one thing to do whatever it is all of you do at the venues… we don't need that shit on the bus."

"Then we just need a system to let everyone know when fuckery abounds."

Zed laughed again. "What are you suggesting we do Bonz? Put up a fucking sign: 'Gang bang in progress. Do not disturb'." He caught a glimpse of Addison across the room trying to hold in a laugh.

Bonzo shrugged and smiled. "Beats tying a sock to the door."

Bucky rolled his eyes. "You seven need to sort that shit out between yourselves." He took a sip of coffee before he continued. "And yeah… there's probably a strip club close to tonight's show. If everyone finishes another song… maybe I'll let you go out and have some fun."

"YES!" Bonzo shouted, jumping up onto the bench seat.

Tracey looked over to Lacey and Stacey. "You know… someone still hasn't been properly initiated..." he said in a sing-song voice.

Stacey clapped excitedly. "Perfect!"

A chilling smile crossed Lacey's lips. "Well, Casey… looks like initiation is tonight."

Addison, Bucky, and Zed's heads all snapped towards Lacey simultaneously. "Initiation?"

.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Yup, I know I suck. I haven't updated in FOREVER. But, this was a good long chapter, so please don't hate on me too much! I'm really trying to finish up the next chapter of Watch Us Shine. It's so close. I was hoping for this week, but this chapter just flowed easier and it finished first. So… I'm going to say next week (fingers crossed). **

**I know this chapter had some pretty dark moments. But, I promise a Happily Ever After. Just stick with me!**

**Let me know what you thought!**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**Take It Off- The Donnas**

**Stiches- Orgy **


	14. High Enough

**Chapter 14**

**HIGH ENOUGH**

"What exactly do you mean, 'initiation,'?" Addison asked as she looked between Lacey, Tracey, and Stacey.

"Oh, nothing too crazy…" Stacey said in between laughs. "We've all done it."

"To be fair, it started because Lacey was actually stripping back then..." Tracey added with a giggle.

"You stripped?" Addison asked looking over to Lacey. "Didn't you just call strippers 'Skank-ho's?'"

"Because it takes one to know one," Zed laughed. Bucky smacked him.

Realization suddenly hit. Addison stood up. "Wait...you want ME to strip?!"

"NO!" Bucky coughed out. "Just...No! Not happening! No one on this bus is stripping."

Zed let out a discreet sigh of relief.

"Technically no one is going to be stripping ON the bus..."

"That's not what I meant, Lacey."

"I know what you meant, Bucky, and you also reminded me last night that the four of us are a band… So, this is me, embracing our new member," she smiled sweetly over to him before looking at Addison. "You in Casey?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Of course… I mean, if you can't dance…," her voice had an icy edge to it, "I'm sure we could come up with something else."

Bucky and Zed both rolled their eyes. Addison never backed down from a challenge.

"Did you just insinuate that I couldn't dance?"

"And there it is..." Bucky mumbled to himself, rolling his eyes and throwing his hands up in frustration.

"I didn't insinuate anything," Lacey smiled.

Addison smiled sweetly back at her. "Well, I guess I'll just have to show you tonight then."

_Addison… dancing… taking off clothes… _Zed was about to lose his mind. He stood up abruptly, practically running to the other end of the bus and straight to the cabinet where they kept the liquor. He had just taken a large swig of Jack when Bonzo came waltzing in. Zed wiped his mouth across his arm and stared daggers at him.

"What?"

"This is all your fucking fault!" he whisper-yelled.

"What did I do?" Bonzo laughed.

"You just HAD to bring up going to a strip club!"

"Dude!" Bonzo took the bottle from him and took a sip. "We haven't been to one since this tour started! I'm going through withdrawals!"

"Stick with groupies!"

"Look who's talking! You have a thing for Acey's… I have a thing for strippers. I don't judge you!"

"I do not have a thing for Acey's."

"Righhhhhht…. Besides, I'd think you'd be pretty stoked to watch."

"You're kidding, right?"

Bonzo shook his head.

"Bonz… I'm either going to end up in jail for beating the shit out of whoever is looking at her or I'm going to get kicked off the tour for fucking her in the middle of that stage… There's no other outcome! Do you know how many fights I got into in high school? And that was when she was wearing clothes!" He ran his hands through his hair, pulling hard at the edges and making it stand up in all directions. "I'm so screwed…"

"You're overthinking this. Just focus on all the other tits and ass surrounding you tonight."

"The only tits and ass I want, belong to her… and she made it pretty clear yesterday that she doesn't want me… Not to mention that Bucky was very graphic this morning in his description of exactly what would happen to me if I ever touched her." His eyes went wide as Bucky's warning replayed in his head. "He's strangely protective..."

"He probably just doesn't want to have to find yet another replacement," Bonzo laughed, handing him the bottle again. "And she might have said she doesn't want you, but she sure as shit spends a lot of time looking at you… and don't think I didn't peep that little side-bar the two of you had earlier..."

Zed sat down at the table and stared at the wall. "My head is so fucked right now…"

"I can see that. You're definitely off your swagger game."

"Dude… I just..." he took a large swig. "I don't know what's going on. One second she's pretending I don't exist, then the next we're flirting like it's practically foreplay, and then the next she's on the verge of tears! She acts like she isn't the one that broke things off!"

Bonzo sat across from him. "Answer me something."

"Shoot?"

"All the internal chaos, the risk to the tour, the almost relapse… Is she worth it?"

Zed was silent for a moment before looking him in the eye. "She's everything."

* * *

"Great set, man!" the bartender called out as he slid Zed a cold beer.

He picked it up in a mock toast. "Thanks." He took a swig, hoping it would help to cool him off. He hated opening. The only thing worse than that was playing with copious amounts of sweat pouring down your face. As soon as their set had ended, all three of them had rushed off the stage to change out of their signature jackets.

"Dude..." Bonzo said from next to him, holding his beer up to his head. "It feels like summer in Bama in here. For all the 'ambiance' they tried to shove into this place, you think they would have invested in some fucking air conditioning. Wanna head outside?"

Zed shook his head 'no'. Before he could say anything else, the house lights dimmed once more and the crowd started to cheer.

"Really?" Bonzo laughed.

Zed just smiled and took another sip of his beer.

"You are such a masochist."

He shrugged his shoulders and sat down on the barstool, watching the stage as The Acey's started their set, his eyes immediately focusing on Addison. Her outfits every night were straight out of his fantasies. Leather and stilettos… they always were his favorite things on her. He watched as a look of sheer panic crossed her face when the spotlight landed on her. She took a deep breath and started to play. Her fingers moving effortlessly through chord progressions.

"I thought you said she was like this force of nature or some shit like that on stage?"

Zed nodded his head again. "She used to be… I don't know what happened."

"She's literally standing still. If it weren't for the fact that I can hear the bass line coming through the amp..."

Zed smacked him. "Watch her eyes..." he smiled.

"And I'm looking for..."

"I knew the fire didn't burn out… There's still a flicker... She just needs to remember what it used to feel like…"

"I'm so confused?"

"She said something after that first show about not performing for a few years, and that she just didn't have it in her anymore."

"I believe her," Bonzo deadpanned.

Zed smacked him again. "It's still there… I can see it even across a crowded room… she's fighting it… If she'd just let go..."

Bonzo finished his drink. "Whatevs, man. I'll take your word for it. I'm heading back to the green room. It is hot as balls in this place."

"I'll be back in a few."

Bonzo laughed again. "Yeah, right… I'll see you after their set. Enjoy your subtle stalking."

Zed still hadn't taken his eyes off her. "I'm not stalking."

"Keep telling yourself that..." Bonzo patted him on the head. "Oh, and maybe if you could squeeze out another song soon, I'd appreciate it. Opening for this dumpster fire sucks ass." Without another word he walked off, leaving Zed to watch.

"What the hell happened, Adds?" he whispered to himself. As he watched her play and fight internally with herself, the beginnings of a song started weaving through his head.

"Hey!" He called out, getting the bartenders attention. "Can I bum a pen from you?"

"Sure..." he grabbed one from the register and handed it to him. "Need another beer?"

"Please."

The bartender cracked open another one and set it down in front of him as Zed began to furiously scribble down lyrics onto a drink napkin.

"I hold on so nervously

To me and my drink

I wish it was cooling me

But so far has not been good

It's been shitty

And I feel awkward as I should

This club has got to be

The most pretentious thing

Since I thought of you and me

Well, I am imagining

A dark lit place

Or your place or my place

Well, I'm not paralyzed

But, I seem to be struck by you

I wanna make you move

Because you're standing still

If your body matches

What your eyes can do

You'll probably move right through

Me on my way to you..."

He smiled to himself and shoved the napkin into his pocket. She was still his very own Pattie Boyd, even if she didn't know it. He grabbed his beer and took a large swig before standing up and heading backstage.

.

* * *

"You can't do this! I won't let you!" Bucky warned as he paced back and forth in front of the shower.

Addison rolled her eyes. She was already cranky from not sleeping. Add to that that the venue that night had been sweltering and now she had to put up with this stupid initiation, she was downright pissed off. All she wanted to do was take a shower in peace and try to cool down before the rest of the band filed back onto the bus to start the night's debauchery. She poked her head out of the shower, interrupting her brother's tirade.

"Do not think for a second that you can tell me what I can and can not do Bartholomew!"

"The last time I checked, I can! I'm older than you!"

"And the last time I checked, you were the one that pulled me into this mess! I was perfectly content back in LA! So unless you want anyone accidentally overhearing this conversation and finding out about us, I suggest you let me shower in peace!"

His eyes narrowed. "This conversation is not over."

"Yes… it is."

"You are not stripping."

With a heavy sigh and an even heavier eye roll, she threw open the shower curtain.

"Ahh!" Bucky clamped his hands over his eyes.

"See! You've seen me naked… multiple times… That's a hell of a lot more than anyone else is going to see tonight."

"Wait… you're not going to strip?"

"I might lose a few items of clothing, but I promise, no one will see me naked."

"Is the curtain closed?"

"...Yes"

Bucky moved his hands and opened his eyes. "Ahhh!"

Addison broke into a fit of laughter before actually closing the curtain. "Ok, ok, now it's closed."

He cautiously cracked one eye before letting out a sigh of relief and opening them both. "You're such a brat."

"Sorry, B… don't know how else to be."

"So you're really not going to completely strip?"

She turned off the water and stuck her hand out. "Towel." Bucky handed it to her and stepped to the side as much as possible in the tiny bathroom so she could get out. "Not that it's any of your business what I choose to show or not show…But, no… I will not be."

"Oh thank god." The look of relief across his face was almost comical. "This morning was bad enough… by the way, I had a little chat with Zed. Something like that will never happen again."

"It was an accident, B… tell me you didn't go all 'old school mafia' on him."

"Knowing Zed, it wasn't an accident… that guy is bad news, Sis."

Addison put her hands on her hips. "So you've said… you also said that he was like the male version of me? Does that mean your opinion of me is that low as well?"

"Adds, the guy has probably slept with half of New York."

"So? I've slept with most of the Sunset Strip."

Bucky shuddered. "I really don't need to hear things like that…"

"Answer my question, Bartholomew."

"Addison… It's not the same."

"Why?"

"Because you're my sister! I'm supposed to protect you! I can't take back the things that have already happened, but I can at least try to keep them from happening now! I asked you to stay away from him for a fucking reason, don't fucking push it!"

Addison took a step towards him and pushed at his chest. "What aren't you telling me?"

"I just said not to push it…or me! I've got a signed contract saying you won't get involved with him."

"I didn't actually sign shit and you know it."

"You didn't have to, remember…" he pointed to himself. "Power of attorney."

Addison was furious. "Why don't you just type up something saying that I'm giving you full control of Bamm! while you're at it!"

"Jesus, Adds! I have power of attorney so you have a chance to KEEP Bamm!" He sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Accident or not, stay away from him. End of conversation."

"Oh...this is SOOOO not the end of the conversation, Brother-dear."

"Enough! I don't understand why you are making such a big deal about this! Do you have a thing for him or something?!"

"No!" she answered a little too quickly.

"Then what the hell is it? Huh?"

"Because I'll be damned if I let anyone tell me what I should or shouldn't do in my bed or with my body!" She yelled back. "You've been on my ass every single fucking night! I don't need you yelling at me every time I get dressed to go on stage! I don't need you throwing a fit because I flirt with fans or hook up with someone after a show! You have to back the fuck off! You want me to be in this band? Then treat me like every other member!"

"But… but..."

"No buts! And for Christ sake, no more following me into the bathroom! All I wanted was ten minutes of peace and quiet before I had to start pretending again! Do you have any idea how fucking hard this is for me? No! You don't! All you care about is that you have a full band!"

Bucky was silent as he watched her fume.

"What now?!" she snapped.

"I forgot how scary you are when you're pissed off… Maybe you should have taken my Dad's offer to work for the family."

Addison reluctantly cracked a smile. "Don't forget it again… And your Dad just loves me because I introduced him to my Uncle Bobby."

"DeNiro...The way to any true mobsters heart..." Bucky smiled. "But you're right… I haven't been fair to you. I'm sorry."

"No more overbearing big brother behavior?"

"I make no promises..."

She rolled her head back and let out a frustrated sigh.

"Sorry. It's in the job description… But, I'll try."

"Thank you."

He wrapped her up in a hug and kissed the top of her wet hair. "You're welcome, Addie-loo."

"Ugh. Don't call me that," she giggled and pushed him away. "Now get out… I need to apply a set of pasties."

"WHAT?!"

Addison burst into laughter. "I'm joking, Bartholomew. But seriously, get the fuck out or I promise I will drop this towel."

"I swear you're going to make me go prematurely gray on this tour," he mumbled as he maneuvered past her and out the door.

* * *

Bright lights flashed and synthetic base boomed as they walked through the purple velvet curtain into the main room of the posh gentleman's club.

"I can't believe we're fucking doing this," Bucky said under his breath, earning him an elbow to the ribs from both Addison and Eliza.

Tracey clapped excitedly and grabbed Addison's hand, dragging her towards an empty set of tables at the front of the stage.

"Remember, other tits and ass..." Bonzo said draping his arm around Zed's shoulder.

"Bonzo..." Zed turned his head and looked at him. "Arm."

Bonzo laughed and removed his arm from him. "Fine… be a grouch. Why don't you go grab us a table, I'll get the first round."

"Thanks, man."

"It's the least I can do… I'm sure tonight will be very entertaining!"

Zed flipped him off before grabbing a table a safe distance away from where The Acey's were gathering. He sat down in his seat and lit a cigarette, trying to fight the urge to look in Addison's direction.

"Hey there, cutie… you look like you could use a distraction..."

Zed looked up to see an overly enhanced blonde standing in front of him.

"Unless you can erase memories of young love gone wrong, I'm afraid you'd be wasting your time."

She smiled and straddled his lap. "Hun… that's my specialty..."

* * *

"Tequila and perrier… heavy on the tequila, light on the water..." Addison said as she sat down at the bar to order. "Oh, and a tequila chaser..." she looked across the room and spotted Zed sitting next to the stage. "...Better make that a double chaser."

"That's a hell of a drink order," Bonzo laughed, sitting down next to her.

She turned and looked at him, smiling over sweetly. "Well, let's see what you would order if you had to take your top off up there."

He laughed and shook his head. "Point well made." He flagged down the bartender. "Can I get two Jack on the rocks? Also, her drinks are on me."

"You don't have to do that Bonzo."

He laughed again and handed his credit card over to bartender before turning back to look at her. "Look, I'll tell you the same thing I told Zed…" The bartender returned with their drinks. Bonzo held his glass up and clinked it against hers. "It's the least I can do..."

"Well thank you," she smiled, downing her first shot before standing up.

"You're welcome." He picked Zed's glass up from the bar and started to walk off. He stopped and turned back towards her. "Good luck up there… Addison."

Her mouth dropped open. "How did you…."

He smiled again and raised his glass in a toast before walking over towards Zed.

Addison shook her head. Of course, Zed would have told Bonzo. Those two shared everything. Even groupies. She let out a huff of frustration and walked back to the table where everyone else was waiting.

"Well, it looks like the boys are well on their way to accomplishing their goal for the evening," Eliza smirked as she sipped her drink and looked bored.

Addison looked over her shoulder just in time to see Zed's head sandwiched between a set of huge fake boobs. "Good for them..." she finished off her tequila and grabbed Tracey's drink from the table.

"Hey! That's mine!"

"And those shoes you're wearing are mine..." she downed the drink in one gulp. "Good lord, that tastes like rubbing alcohol and bad decisions...keep them coming."

* * *

_One, two, three_

_Not only you and me..._

Zed's head snapped towards the stage the second the song registered in his brain.

_Got one eighty degrees_

_And I'm caught in between..._

"Fuck me gently with a chainsaw..." he whispered taking in the site of Addison on stage.

_Countin'_

_One, two, three_

_Peter, Paul, and Mary_

_Gettin' down with 3P_

_Everybody loves me_

_Oh…_

He pushed the voluptuous blonde off of his lap, completely transfixed on Addison. "… That's the same routine she did senior year."

"Woah..." Bonzo whispered in awe next to him. "Where the hell is that on stage every night?"

"Now do you see what I meant? Holy Christ on a cracker..." he not so subtly readjusted his suddenly too-tight pants as he watched her leather jacket drop to the stage as she executed a perfect pirouette.

_Babe, pick a night_

_To come out and play_

_If it's alright_

_What do you say?_

He couldn't take his eyes off her. This was the girl he knew. She owned the room. Everyone was watching her. With every sway of her hips, they cheered for more.

_Merrier the more_

_Triple fun that way_

_Twister on the floor_

_What do you say?_

She strutted around the pole before pressing her back against it. As she shimmied down, she slowly began to unbutton the black blouse she was wearing.

_Are you in_

_Livin' in sin is the new thing (yeah)_

_Are you in_

_I am countin'_

_One, two, three..._

Her shirt hit the floor.

"Fuck me..." he whispered. Her long fishnet covered legs kicked out as she spun around the pole.

"Damn… You know, there's nothing in the Acey's contract that says I can't hook up..."

A low growl tore from Zed's mouth, cutting him off before he could finish. "Bonz...we were in active combat together… you know what I'm capable of… try anything..." He stopped talking when Addison danced over towards them. His mouth ran dry as she stood on the small round table between the two of them. Her long white hair skimming the top of her sheer black bra. She was breathtaking. She looked down to him and winked. He knew what was coming next. There's no way she'd do it again and risk her cover.

_What we do is innocent_

_Just for fun and nothin' meant_

_If you don't like the company..._

She gracefully fell into his lap, running a hand down his face, just like she had at lunch the first day of Senior year when she defended her title as HBIC. He held his breath in anticipation as she drew his face closer to hers and started to sing.

"Let's just do it you and me… You and me… Or three … Or four… On the floor…."

She blew him a kiss before kicking her leg up and over him so she was off his lap. Before he could even process what had happened, she was already across the stage dancing in front of Tracey.

"Oh thank god..."

"What?"

"That ended with one hell of a kiss last time..."

_One, two, three_

_Not only you and me_

_Got one eighty degrees_

_And I'm caught in between..._

"I've never felt so left out..." Bonzo pouted as he watched Addison dance on Bucky.

Zed punched him without taking his eyes off of Addison. "Do you think Bucky is gay?"

Bonzo rubbed his arm. "What?" he laughed.

"I thought maybe they were hooking up...but our boy looks like he's about to be sick."

"Huh… never really thought about it. Didn't he hook up with E a few years back?"

Zed shook his head. "I don't think so."

Bonzo shrugged. They both watched as Addison climbed back onto the stage for her big finish. She swung around the pole effortlessly, coming down in a full split. Everyone in the club was on their feet applauding.

"She did THAT in school?"

Zed nodded his head quickly. "I mean, she had clothes on and there was no pole… but yeah..."

"How the hell did she not get suspended?"

His smile widened. "Because she's Addison Fucking Donnelly."

* * *

"Hot Damn! Sexy Mamacita!" Tracey giggled as Addison triumphantly made her way back to their table. He pulled her into a tight hug and smacked a loud kiss on her cheek. "I have to say, Case… I was NOT expecting Britney!"

Addison rolled her eyes playfully as she hugged him back. "Are you kidding? God is a woman, and her name is Britney Spears."

"I can not argue with that! Damn women… fierce shoes… loves Britney… knows how to move... if I were straight I'd so be all over you right now!"

"Awwww… thanks, Tracey!"

Lacey stood up and held out her hand. "You're officially one of us!"

Addison shook her hand. "Thanks, Lacey."

"Be honest… that wasn't your first time on a pole, was it?" she asked skeptically.

"Believe it or not, I have never done that before."

"Well, damn… you could teach a class. That technique was..." she shook her head. "I'm impressed."

"Wow… Thanks, Lacey..."

"Don't get used to it."

Addison held her hands up in mock surrender.

Stacey was next in line to congratulate her and "officially" welcome her into the band. She handed her a shot of vodka. "To our newest Acey!"

"CASEY!" they all toasted.

* * *

Nearly an hour later, the shots were still flowing as the celebration continued. Addison was almost drunk enough to forget that Zed was sitting across the room from her. Almost. Every now and then she found herself glancing in his direction, fighting the primal urge to grab him and drag him off to a dark corner so that she could have her wicked way with him.

"You look like you're thinking something naughty..." Eliza whispered as she leaned in closer.

Addison snorted out a small laugh and flipped her off.

"If anyone asks… I had a headache and went back to the bus," she whispered before standing up and walking off.

Bucky watched her walk out past the velvet curtains before he stood up. "Casey… can I talk to you for a moment?"

She suddenly realized what was going on and started to giggle as she followed him out of the club.

"Are you using me as a diversion so you can get laid?" she asked the second they cleared the door.

He laughed and pulled her into a hug. "Maybe."

"Well, I guess I'll allow it… You did a good job not going all Big Bro on me tonight!"

He laughed and rolled his eyes. "Yeah… I was trying. You didn't make it easy you know… I could have gone my whole life without you grinding on me."

"Maybe Eliza can use some of those moves on you instead," she whispered in a fit of giggles.

"Okay… I was about to ask you to cover for me while E and I grab a hotel for a few, but I think I should bring you back to the bus, Drunky."

"I'm not as think as you drunk I am!"

"And thank you for proving my point..."

"No! You need to get laid. And Eliza needs to spend some time alone with you. I'll be fine..." she said shooing him off.

"Are you sure?"

She pushed at his shoulder. "Seriously, B. Go."

"Okay… but call me, I have my phone."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." As Bucky turned to walk off she shouted for him. "Bucky!"

"What?"

"Don't forget to wrap it up!"

He flipped her off and smiled. "Look who's talking!"

She blew him a kiss and made her way back inside and to the table.

"Where's Lacey?" Addison asked, picking up another shot from the table.

Stacey motioned over her shoulder. "Making a complete fool of herself."

Addison looked over. "Is she…."

"Trying to give Zed a lap dance?" Tracey finished for her. "Yeah..."

"I thought she hated him?"

"There is a fine line between hate and love, sister..." he said holding up a shot and clinking it against hers before they both drank.

"Boy is that the truth..."

"Excuse me…"

The three of them looked up.

"Would you mind if my friends and I joined you?"

Tracey eyed the tall man from head to toe. "We'd mind if you didn't, Hot stuff… pull up some chairs!"

* * *

"The fuck..."

Bonzo looked up from the stripper on his lap. "What?"

Zed rolled his eyes and motioned over towards the table where the Acey's had been sitting all night. Addison was now the only one there, sitting on top of the table surrounded by four frat looking guys hanging on her every word as she laughed and tossed her hair over her shoulder.

"Lacey! For the last time! Stop trying to stick your tongue in my ear! Fuck!"

"Well then pay attention to me!" she whined.

"Why?" he snapped.

Lacey huffed and sat down next to him.

Bonzo could see the tension vein in Zed's neck start to pulse. He'd been around him in enough stressful situations to know that his friend was about to snap.

"You so fucking owe me, Z," Bonzo whispered as he pounded a shot. He slipped a bill into the dancer's thong and smacked her ass. "Thanks… I think I'm good for now." The stripper angrily grabbed her top and stormed off. "Lacey?"

She looked up from her spot next to Zed. "What?"

"Those moves looked damn hot… Wanna show me what you can do somewhere a little more... private?"

She looked back up to Zed.

He rolled his eyes. "Never fucking happening, psycho."

She huffed and stood up, grabbing Bonzo's hand and pulling him towards the ladies room.

Zed watched as they disappeared down the dark hallway. He finished off his drink and stood up, looking around to make sure no one else was around. With the coast clear, he started towards Addison and her small crowd of admirers. He purposely walked up behind her.

"Hey, Princess… where's everyone else?"

Her head snapped around. "Zed! I missed you!" she giggled, standing up on the table so she could hug him. She turned her head back towards the guys."This is the guy I was telling you about!" she whisper-shouted.

He gently guided her face back towards him. "Jesus, how much did you drink?"

She shrugged and giggled some more, leaning into his touch.

"Where are Tracey and Stacey?"

She shrugged again. "They left with…." she snapped her fingers trying to recall their names. "I don't know… baseball hat guy, and dimple cheeks guy."

"What about Bucky?"

"He needed to sleep in a real bed away from all of us."

"They left you alone?"

She nodded her head.

"She's not alone… we'll take care of her," one of the guys sitting around her said.

Zed growled at him. "I don't think so..." he looked back to Addison. "Come on Adds."

"You're supposed to call me Casey… remember, silly? C-A-S-…" she stopped and looked up at him. "Is it E-Y or I-E?"

"Yeah… I've heard enough..." He scooped her off the table and over his shoulder.

"Where are we..." she could barely get the words out in between fits of giggles.

"Away from possible trouble," He said as they made their way out of the club.

"Whatever you say, Trouble!" She continued to giggle until she suddenly stopped and smacked his ass. "Speaking of trouble! You, mister, are in big trouble!"

He smiled and shook his head. Drunk Addie always was entertaining. "Me? Why?"

"Because you told Bonzo. Now he knows I'm not really Casey."

Zed cursed under his breath. If it weren't for the fact that Bonzo was currently screwing Lacey just to keep her away from him, he'd be nut punching him the second he saw him. Addison wiggled around, making her short pleated skirt ride up higher, successfully distracting him. He smiled and fixed her skirt, only for her to squirm around again.

"Will you stop wiggling your ass?! It's right in my face…"

She giggled and wiggled some more.

"Adds, I swear, I will bite it…"

She lifted her head up and looked at him, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth. "Promise?"

"Do. Not. Start with that lip!"

She poked it out in a pout instead.

"Not the pout!" He laughed. "That's almost as lethal!" he smacked her ass.

Addison giggled. "You know I can walk if I'm getting too heavy."

"Are you kidding me? You are lighter than I remember… which is saying something..." He stopped walking. "And now I need to change the subject… and take a very cold shower."

"Why?" she asked, poking his butt.

"No Bullshit?"

She nodded her head and smiled.

He set her down onto her feet, catching her as she stumbled unsteadily. "Because now I can't stop thinking about all the crazy ways I used to be able to throw you around in bed and it's making it a little uncomfortable to walk."

"I'm sure I could help fix that for you..." she whispered, running a finger down his arm.

"I don't think so… If I remember right, we're supposed to be staying away from one another. The other day was a mistake...a one-time thing… isn't that what you said?"

"I did?"

He nodded.

"Well, that was a stupid thing for me to say..." she giggled, almost falling over.

"What did you drink? The only time I have ever seen you this drunk was Mason's birthday party."

"That's because I had Vodka!"

Zed rolled his eyes in exasperation. "Christ… I am so glad I got you out of there..."

"Me too..." she said breathily, running her hand down his stomach and grabbing him through his pants.

He let out a small whimper as his eyes rolled back into his head.

"Adds..."

"I don't like anyone better than you, it's true..." she sang into his ear.

"I'd crawl a mile in a desolate place with the snakes, just for you..."

Zed let out a sigh of relief when she let him go, but it was short-lived. Her hands started to work the button fly of his pants.

"Oh, I'm an animal, hand me a tramadol, gimme the juice

You are my citadel, you are my wishing well, my baby blue, oh, oh, oh..."

Her hand wrapped around him. Zed was lost in the sensation. Without even thinking about it, he grabbed her face and kissed her. He moaned into her mouth. "Fuck...You taste like every dark thought I've ever had..."

"I want you inside of me so fucking bad..." Her kisses were frantic as she continued to stroke him.

A loud series of catcalls coming from across the street brought him back to reality.

"Adds… we need to stop… we're in the middle of a sidewalk..."

She smiled up to him and bit her bottom lip. "So… wouldn't be the first time..."

"That look is going to be the death of me. I swear..." He pulled her hand out of his pants and picked her back up, walking as quickly as he could.

Addison was of no help. She kept wiggling around, running her hands over him, biting him, scratching him… He was almost at his breaking point.

"Gorgeous, I'm trying to scrape together every last shred of morality I have, which I'll admit isn't much, and not fuck you against a wall again."

"But what if I want you to?"

"You're too drunk to know what you want right now...Fucking vodka..."

She giggled and started to drunkenly sing again.

"I used to like liquor to get me inspired

But you look so beautiful, my new supplier

I used to like smoking to stop all the thinking

But I found a different buzz

The world is a curse, it'll kill if you let it

I know they got pills that can help you forget it

They bottle it, call it medicine

But I don't need drugs..."

she hiccuped before starting to sing even louder.

"'Cause I'm already high enough

You got me, you got me good

I'm already high enough

I only, I only, I only got eyes for you..."

Zed sent up a silent prayer of thanks as the bus came into view. "Almost there, Adds." She maneuvered herself around so that she had her legs wrapped around his waist and her arms around his neck. Her hands pulled at his hair as her mouth latched onto his neck.

"Addie..." he whined. She giggled and sunk her teeth into his collarbone. "Fuck, that feels good..." He knocked on the bus but got no answer. He opened the door. "Hello? Anyone home? Eliza?"

"She's not really here, silly..." she said, pulling his face down to hers for another kiss.

He climbed the steps and walked them over to the bench seat, sitting them both down.

"Addison..."

"Do you see anyone other than me?

Baby, please..." She sang against his lips.

"I'll take a hit of whatever you got

Maybe two, maybe three..." her hands worked themselves under his shirt.

"Oh, you're phenomenal, feel like a domino, fall to my knees

I am a malady, you are my galaxy my sweet relief, oh, oh, oh …"

"Addison…You know I want you… But I don't want you to regret this in the morning..."

"Fuck regret!"

"Now where have I heard that before..." He somehow managed to pull away from her. "I'm going to go get you some cold water."

"Oh don't try to give me cold water...I don't wanna sober up...all I see are tomorrows...Oh, the stars were made for us…." she broke into a fit of giggles, almost falling off of the bench seat. "Shit, that's pretty good. I need to write that down." She started to dig wildly through her purse until she retrieved her journal. "I thought this thing had lines..." she said squinting to find where to write.

"Just hand it here," Zed took the leather-bound notebook from her hands and started to scribble down what she had just sung. "There. Written down, now let's get you into bed."

"Mine or yours, Handsome."

Zed ran his hands through his hair anxiously, pulling at the ends. "You are not making this easy."

"Oh, I think I am," she said as she knelt down in front of him.

"That's...that's not what I meant, Adds….Fuck, that feels good..." his eyes nearly crossed as he felt her teeth graze against him on the outside of his pants. He shook his head for clarity. He picked her back up and onto his shoulder, walking her towards the bunks. He opened the curtain to hers and set her down. "Stay..." he ordered, before walking towards the back of the bus. He grabbed a bottle of water out of the refrigerator and then a few Tylenol out of the bathroom. As he stepped back into the hall, his phone started to buzz. He pulled it out and looked at the message.

_Bonzo_

_3:15a…Hope you're having fun, but... WE NEED TO TALK ASAP!_

He rolled his eyes and typed out a quick response before shoving the phone back into his pocket and walking back to Addison's bunk. He couldn't help but smile. She was fast asleep.

"Adds… wake up. I need you to take these. You'll feel a whole hell of a lot better in the morning if you do."

She didn't even open her eyes as she sat back up and opened her mouth.

"You're adorable..." he smiled as he placed the pain relievers onto her tongue. "Now drink," he said holding to bottle up to her lips. She swallowed them down and collapsed back onto her pillow. "Addie..." he whispered, shaking her shoulder. "Do you want to change? I can't imagine that outfit is comfortable."

She sat back up, lifting her arms. He laughed softly, "Oh, so now I have to change you?" She sleepily nodded her head. He pretended to sigh. "If I must… Getting you naked is such the chore..." He carefully helped her out of her constricting outfit. As his hand brushed against her forearm, he could feel a raised line under her tattoo. Gently, he lifted her arm and examined it more closely. The scar ran the entire length of the skeleton. He ran his hand along her wrist, finding another scar under that tattoo as well. Very carefully he looked at her other wrist, finding another covered scar. He ran his fingertips softly over the tattoo on her breastplate, same thing. The one on her hip covered an exceptionally large one. Finally, he traced the words along her bikini line, finding a thin line that ran almost from hip bone to hip bone. He couldn't get to the ones on her back, but he'd be willing to bet that those were covering scars as well. His breath caught in his throat.

"What happened to you, Adds..."

A soft snore was his only answer. He sighed and picked up her discarded clothes, folding them and setting them on the small shelf at the end of the bunk. He looked around for something for her to sleep in. Her sweatshirt was already in the pile to be laundered. Without knowing what else to do, he pulled his black t-shirt over his head and put it on her. He gently laid her back down onto her pillow.

"Goodnight, Beautiful," he whispered, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. As he climbed down he heard her whisper his name.

"Zed..."

"I'm right here."

She breathed out a soft sigh. "...Forever..."

His breath caught as he watched her smile in her sleep. With his heart beating in his throat he leaned down and kissed her gently. "...and after."

.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** More and more past questions! I know! I promise all will come to light… eventually. Stick with me! **

**If you're enjoying this crazy story or have any wild theories, drop me a review and let me know! I'd love to hear your thoughts!**

**Don't forget to follow me on Instagram at By_QuietlyScreaming **

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**High Enough- K. Flay**

**Paralyzer- Finger Eleven **

**3- Britney Spears**


	15. Good Girls Don't

**Chapter 15**

**GOOD GIRLS DON'T**

"Good afternoon, boys!" Addison cheerily greeted Mason and Zed as she and Bree walked to their table in the quad. She kissed them both on the cheek and climbed up the bench, sitting on top of the table. "So…. what's everyone doing this weekend?"

"Well, Z here was going back up to Seat..."

"Mase… it was a rhetorical question," she said interrupting him. "We have plans." She reached into her purse and pulled out two envelopes, handing them each one.

"YES!" Mason yelled out excitedly. "I didn't know you set the date!"

"What is this?"

"Only the most sought after invite of the year! Hot off the press!" Bree teased from next to him. "You better hold on tight to that… last year one of them ended up fetching a grand."

Addison giggled. "She's exaggerating… It was a set that went for a grand… but I wouldn't worry too much about it, this year isn't going to be nearly as big as last year."

Zed finally opened up the silver envelope and pulled out the heavy card, reading it over. "Wait… your birthday is this weekend?"

Addison nodded her head and smiled. "It worked out that we could have the party on my actual birthday."

"Who's playing?" Mason asked as he dug around in her purse. "Where's your gum?"

She smacked his hand away and pulled the pack of juicy fruit out of her cheer top, handing him and Zed both a piece. "I don't know yet. Daddy said it's a surprise."

"I thought we played your parties? I'm offended," Zed teased as he popped the gum into his mouth.

"You know you guys are my favorite garage band, despite the crap-tastic name," she added with a heavy eye roll. "But I want you guys to enjoy the party."

"Dude… Last year was insanity! I don't even remember all the names that played! It was seriously bigger than Coachella!"

Addison rolled her eyes again. "Mason is exaggerating. We only had one stage… but that's beside the point… Last year was my Sweet 16, and we went all out. This year is much smaller and back at my mother's house. It won't be all that different from the parties I throw every few weeks."

"Except this one will have concert level production value, a professional DJ, one or more of Bamm!'s current top-selling artists… shall I go on?" Bree giggled from next to them.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah..." Addison smiled. She stood up and jumped off the table, bending down to pick up her backpack.

"Adds! Aren't you supposed to wear something under your cheer skirt!?" Mason scolded.

"I am!"

"La Perla doesn't count!"

She stood up and looked over her shoulder, throwing him a wink. "Where's the fun in that? You coming to class, Jacobs?"

Zed almost tripped over his own feet as he quickly jumped up to follow her.

"Well, that will certainly make the Pep Rally more interesting!" Mason called out after them.

"They're going to look anyway! Might as well give them something to look at!" She called back to him.

Zed couldn't help but laugh. "You're wild… you know that, right?"

She shrugged. "We all rebel where we can… So… think we'll be first in today?"

He glanced down at his watch. "We have fifteen minutes…"

"We better hurry then!" She grabbed his hand and ran towards the music building. Afternoon vocals was always her favorite class. They all used it as a chance to show off their skills. Every day it was a race to see who would get there first to commandeer the spotlight.

When they finally reached the classroom, she let out a sigh of contentment. "I love when I'm the first one in," she said with a satisfied smile, flipping on the lights. She dropped her bag off in the corner and ran to the piano, firing off a few rapid scales out of habit.

"Damnit! Donnelly got in first again," one of their classmates said as he walked into the room a second later.

Addison blew him a kiss as she started to play.

"I've been a bad, bad girl..."

"Wooooo!" one of their other classmates called out as she walked in. Addison smiled and continued to play.

"I've been careless with a delicate man

And it's a sad, sad world

When a girl will break a boy

Just because she can..."

"Aww, come on… Fiona Apple? Really?"

"Everyone's a critic..." she laughed. "Fine...fine..." She looked over to the corner where Zed was standing, watching her like he always did. She motioned for him to come over. "Do you know that No Doubt song New?" she asked in an almost whisper.

"In a late 90's early 2000's mood today?"

She smiled, "Yes or no, Jacobs?"

"Yeah, I know it..."

"Good… take over..." she slid over making room for him on the bench. He cracked his knuckles and started to play as she continued to sing.

"New, you're so new

You… you're new

And I've never had this taste in the past

New... you're so new..."

Addison stood up on the bench, using it as a step to get to the top of the piano. She looked down at him and winked.

"My normal hesitation is gone

And I really gravitate to your will

Are you here to fetch me out?

'Cause I've never had this taste in my mouth

Oh you're not old

And you're not familiar

Recently discovered and I'm learning about you

New…"

She swayed her hips and started to dance as she sang. Feeding off the energy from everyone in the room. She looked back down to Zed, knowing his eyes would still be on her. She didn't know what it was about him. The pull they had towards each other was so intense it scared her sometimes. She could lie to Mason and Bree all she wanted, but she couldn't lie to herself. She wanted more from him than friendship.

"And you're consuming me violently

And your reverence shamelessly tempting me

Who sent this maniac?

'Cause I never had this taste in the past..."

He winked and gave her what was quickly becoming her favorite cocky crooked smile, almost like he could tell exactly what she was thinking about. Stupid girlfriend... But, if she made him happy… who was she to get in the way of that?

"Why am I so curious?

This territory is dangerous

I'll probably end up at the start

I'll be back in line with my broken heart..."

The way he looked at her just wasn't normal. She had been trying to convince herself that she was reading too much into it. But that smile… it always seemed to be reserved just for her.

"Don't let it go away

This feeling has got to stay

Don't let it go away..."

"Miss Donnelly… as impressive as you've shown your range to be, I'm going to have to ask you to kindly get down from the top of the piano."

She looked up to see their teacher standing in the doorway with a large smile across his face.

"Sorry, Sir."

He waved off her apology, as he called out for them all to find their seats.

She looked over to Zed. "Give me a hand down?"

He smiled even wider and stood up from the bench, picking her up easily. "Gladly..."

The feel of his hands around her waist made her pulse quicken.

"That was a hell of a show," he whispered as he set her down on her feet. She didn't know if it was wishful thinking or if his hands actually lingered on her a little longer than necessary.

"Thank you for backing me up..."

"Anytime… I had quite the view..."

She playfully smacked his arm as she looked up into his eyes.

"Addison! Zed! Seats!"

They both suppressed a laugh as they found their way over to the corner of the classroom that they had claimed as their own.

* * *

She stood there staring at the nearly empty refrigerator. "Looks like my choices are Kale or Tofu..." she said into the phone.

"That's just wrong on so many levels..." Zed laughed on the other end.

She couldn't remember exactly when their nightly phone calls had started, but she did know that her evening felt incomplete if they didn't talk. Their conversations had started simple enough, asking about an assignment one night or laughing about something Mason had done. But they quickly turned into hours-long conversations about everything and anything.

"Yeah… I guess my mom forgot that I still live here, even when she's on location." She grabbed a bottle of water and closed the door."Well, what are you having for dinner?"

"No clue yet. My mom's working the night shift, so I'll probably end up ordering a pizza or something."

"Oh man..." Addison practically moaned. "Pizza..." she wandered into the home theatre and plopped down picking up the remote. "I could murder a Margherita pizza right about now..." She turned on the television and let out a gasp.

"What?"

"Audition is streaming on Fangoria!"

"Audition? Like Audition, Audition? As in the most disturbing Japanese horror movie ever made, Audition?"

Addison let out a laugh. "That would be the one! Man, I love that movie!"

"I've always wanted to see that!"

"You've never seen it?!"

"No, I haven't..."

"Okay, we have to do something about that! It's a must-see for any horror enthusiast!"

Zed was quiet for a moment. "I've got an idea..."

"What?"

"Pizza and a movie? I'll take care of the pizza and we can watch the movie in your ridiculous home theater."

She excitedly sat up in the plush recliner. "Really?!"

"Yeah… I mean, if you want to..."

She could hear the nervousness in his voice.

"I'd love that..." she smiled.

"Really?"

"Mmhmm..." she could hear a flurry of activity coming from his end.

"I'll be over soon, then."

"Sounds great! See you soon." She hung up the phone and sighed contently as she hugged the phone to her chest.

Thirty minutes later the sound of the gate buzzer was sounding through the house. She took a deep breath calming breath as she walked over to the control panel on the wall. "Relax… Just friends… You're Addison Donnelly… He's just a boy… Just a friend… He has a girlfriend," she repeated the mantra to herself as she opened the front door and walked outside to meet him. The moment she saw him pull up on a jet black motorcycle all coherent thoughts left her brain. Time seemed to move in slow motion as he killed the engine and took off his helmet, running his hands through his hair as he looked over to her.

"Adds..."

She shook her head and smiled. "I'm sorry, what?"

"I asked if you were okay? Still up for pizza?"

"Pizza...Oh! Oh, yeah! Of course..." She let out a loud exhale. "I'm sorry… I'm just... I had no idea you drove a motorcycle..."

"Yeah… I worked my ass off for two summers saving up for this thing..." he stroked the steel frame appreciatively. "It's no Ferrari, but it's definitely an adrenaline rush… Have you ever ridden on one?"

She bit her lip and shook her head. "I've always wanted to… but my Dad thinks they're way too dangerous."

"So, a Ferrari for a first car, is safe, but a motorcycle?"

"The car also came with driving lessons with Sebastian Vettel from the Ferrari Formula One Racing team.

He threw his head back and laughed. "Of course it did."

"What? Daddy wasn't about to let me loose on the streets of LA without me knowing how to drive the thing."

"Why don't we go out for pizza instead of having delivery." He tossed her the helmet. "Get on..."

She caught it and smiled. "Really?!"

He nodded his head and gave her that damn smile again. She slid the helmet onto her head and climbed onto the back of the bike.

"You're going to have to hold on tight..."

She put her arms around his waist, "Like this?"

"Little tighter..."

She wrapped her arms tightly around him, leaning into his back. Her head swam as the scent of his cologne invaded her senses.

"Much better...You ready?"

She nodded excitedly as the engine roared to life.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Oh. My. God! What a rush!" she exclaimed as she threw her arms around him in the pizzeria parking lot. "Thank you!"

"So I take it you like the bike?"

"Yeah… that would be an understatement," she giggled. "I love driving my car, but man… that was..."

"Freeing?"

She nodded her head and smiled.

"Well, if it helps any, you look hot on the back of the bike too..."

"Zed, I'm always hot."

"Very true," he laughed draping his arm around her. "Let's eat..."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

An hour and a half later they were finally back to her house.

"Are you sure you still want to watch the movie? It's getting kind of late," she asked as she flipped on the lights in the home theatre.

"I'm game if you are. My mom won't be home until I'm at school tomorrow."

"Well, of course, I'm game! I'm here by myself. I'll probably end up sleeping in here again."

"Does that happen often?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "When it's just me in the house, sure. The seats are surprisingly comfortable," she pretended to whisper as if sharing a big secret.

He smiled and hugged her. "You're too cute sometimes..."

"I don't think I've been called cute since I was in grammar school," she giggled.

"Well, you are."

"Thanks… I guess," she smiled up to him. "So… movie?"

"Let's do this!" He dropped his stuff into one of the recliners. "I'm going to hit the bathroom before we start though. If this movie is as scary as they say, I don't want to pee my pants..."

"God, I hope you're kidding," she laughed.

"I am… but I still need to go."

She motioned over to a door at the far end of the theatre. "It's right there. I'll go ahead and pull up the movie while I wait."

"Sounds like a plan...I'll be right back."

The door had barely closed when his phone began to ring.

"Z! Your phone!"

"You can answer. It's either Mase or my mom!"

She grabbed the phone out of his helmet, not bothering to look at the screen as she answered. "Hello! Zed's phone!" she said cheerfully. "No… This is Addison..." she pulled the phone away from her ear slightly as the voice on the other end yelled. The second Zed walked back out from the bathroom she tossed him the phone. "I think it's your girlfriend..." she said in a low warning whisper.

His eyes widened as he held the phone up to his ear. He listened for a moment longer before he interrupted her tirade. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk to my friends like that..." He rolled his eyes at whatever was being said. "You have friends of the opposite gender, too. I don't say shit about that." He was quiet for a few minutes as he listened to what she was saying. "Yeah… about that… some things came up." He held the phone away from his ear and mouthed the word "Sorry" to Addison. "Hey… Listen, I have to run… I'm working on a project for school...No, yeah, later… Uh-huh… you too. Byes..." He hung up the phone and let out a deep breath.

"I don't think your girlfriend likes me very much..." she fake whispered, making him smile.

"She doesn't even know you."

"Still… I hope you're not in too much trouble with her?"

"It's fine. Don't worry about it… She's just pissed because I told her I would call her tonight, and well… I forgot… She's not normally that bitchy. I swear."

"You don't have to explain anything to me. She's your girlfriend. Not mine," Addison giggled.

He sat down in the recliner next to her and put his arm around her. "Well, that would certainly be hot..."

"What would?"

"Nothing," he smiled, picking the remote up.

Addison snatched it out of his hand and turned her body so that she was looking him in the eyes. "What would be hot?"

"I was just momentarily fantasizing about the two of you together," he shrugged. "Sorry. I'm a seventeen-year-old guy."

She rolled her eyes. "All right, Jacobs… let me see her picture."

"What?"

"Your girlfriend… I know you have pics and Mason has said she's hot… Sooo… let me see."

He gave her a questioning look but obliged. He unlocked his phone and pulled up his gallery for her to look through.

After a few minutes of scrolling, Addison sighed and handed him the phone back. "I'm sorry, Zed."

"For what?"

"I tried to make it work… but, she just isn't my type."

Zed rolled his head back and laughed. "Good to know… what is your type?"

Addison smiled. "Wouldn't you like to know."

"I would! That's why I'm asking."

"Well… I guess it depends."

"On..."

"If we're talking about guys or girls or..."

Zed sat up a little straighter. "Wait… girls?"

She shrugged and nodded her head. "Yeah… I mean, you can't turn off what turns you on… so… why limit yourself to one gender? Sexuality is fluid...Go with the flow."

Zed's jaw dropped open. "You are full of surprises, Addison." He smiled as he snatched the remote back from her. "Shall we, my dear?"

She leaned over and hit a button on the remote, dimming the lights in the room. "We shall… after all, this is a very important school project."

"You caught that, huh?" he laughed and hit play as they settled in to watch one of the scariest movies ever made.

Throughout the movie, she could feel his eyes on her. Finally, at about the halfway mark, she looked over to him. "What?"

He bit back a laugh at being busted. "I keep waiting for you to flinch, or jump, or be scared."

She smiled and rolled her eyes. "Awww… were you hoping I'd have to hide my face in your chest and have you hold me to make me feel safe?"

Zed laughed a little louder. "I'm just saying… those services are available if needed."

"Noted..." her smile grew a little wider. "How about this..." she flipped the armrests of their recliners up and grabbed the throw blanket from the chair next to them, before snuggling into his side and covering them with the blanket. "There. Is that better?"

He wrapped his arm around her, grinning like an idiot. "Much… And you're right, these chairs are comfortable."

"I told you so. Now watch the damn movie… this is the best part."

When the movie finally ended, they stayed snuggled together falling asleep to the next movie that autoplayed.

* * *

"YO! ADDS!"

She rolled her eyes and stood up from her spot on the balcony, looking down to see Mason and Zed standing by the front door. "WHY CAN'T YOU USE THE INTERCOM LIKE A NORMAL PERSON?" She called down to him.

"JUST LET US IN!"

"YOU KNOW THE CODE! USE IT!"

"BRAT!"

"YOU KNOW IT!" She looked over to Bree and laughed. "He's going to be pissed we started without him."

Bree shrugged. "Well, then he shouldn't have been forty minutes late!"

A second later they heard loud footsteps running up the stairs. Mason threw open the door to her room and ran over to her, picking her up and swinging her around.

"Happy Birthday!"

She hugged him tight and kissed his cheek. "Thanks, Mase!"

He set her down and hugged Bree. "Aww, man! You're pre-partying without us?" he whined, noticing the joint laying in the crystal ashtray next to them.

"Well, yeah. You guys were late. At this point, guests are going to start showing up."

Zed was standing against the doorway to the balcony shaking his head. "Sorry about that. Someone couldn't decide on what to wear..."

"Hey! There's going to be a lot of hotties here tonight… I need to look my best!"

Bree snorted. "Maybe you should have taken more time then..." she said offering him the joint.

Mason flipped her off before taking it from her.

Addison and Zed both rolled their eyes before looking at one another and laughing.

"Happy birthday," he said softly, giving her her favorite smile.

"Thank you," she mouthed silently.

"A tiara?"

Addison let out a soft laugh and pretended to straighten it. "Too much?"

"It suits you… very princessy..."

"Well, it is my birthday."

"Will you two stop flirting?" Mason said as he handed her the joint.

She rolled her eyes. "We are not flirting, Mase. We're talking."

"Riiiiiiighttttt…. Whatevs… So… What's the entertainment schedule for the night?"

She took a puff and passed it to Bree. "DJ playing the first half and then Neon Trees plays the second half."

Bree choked on the smoke she was holding in. "Did you just say Neon Trees?!"

Addison shook her head and smiled. "They're recording over at Daddy's studio downtown. So, he asked them to play tonight. Try out a few new songs live."

"I love your birthday parties!" Bree giggled. She grabbed Mason's hand and started pulling him towards the door. "Let's go!"

"But the party doesn't start for twenty minutes!"

"I don't care! I'm not moving from the front of that stage!"

Addison shook her head as she watched them run out of the room. "Zed..."

He looked over to see her beckoning him closer with her finger.

"What's up?"

She looked past him to make sure that Mason and Bree were far enough out of earshot before looking back up to him nervously. "I didn't want to say anything in front of them because I only have two… and you can totally tell me to fuck off..." she added quickly before taking another breath. "...but my step-brother hooked me up with two tabs for my birthday… he wouldn't have given them to me if they weren't safe… and it's no fun rolling by yourself… and I can't choose between Mase and Bree… and… and..."

Zed smiled and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Just ask, Addison."

She smirked and rolled her eyes. "Fine… Do you want to do a tab of X with me?"

"You are full of surprises..." he laughed.

"Is that a yes or a no, Jacobs."

He took a step closer to her. "It's your birthday. Do you want me to roll with you?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't..."

"Then the answer is yes..."

She smiled up at him and bit her bottom lip. They were so close together that their noses practically touched. "Are you always this easy?"

"Just ask..."

She smacked his arm playfully. "You, are trouble." She reached into her bra and pulled out a small clear baggie containing the two pills.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"I feel soooo good right now," she giggled running her hands through his hair. "You're hair is so soft… I could do this all night..." She was feeling completely free, enjoying the euphoria of every sensation.

His hands rubbed along her leg inching higher and higher with each pass. "You're skin is soft too..." His nose skimmed her cheek.

"That feels… so good..." she was lost in the feeling of his hands on her. It didn't matter where they were, as long as he didn't stop.

_Hey, hey_

_You, you _

_I don't like your girlfriend _

"OH MY GOD! I love this song!" she yelled out, suddenly hopping up from her spot on his lap.

_No way, no way _

_I think you need a new one _

_Hey, hey _

_You, you _

_I could be your girlfriend_

She grabbed his hands, dragging him towards the dance floor. "Dance with me?!"

_Hey, hey_

_You, you _

_I know that you like me _

"Whatever the birthday girl wants, the birthday girl gets," he shouted over the music with a laugh.

_No way, no way _

_No, it's not a secret _

"Don't you forget it!" she giggled as she started to dance around, losing herself in the music.

_Hey, hey _

_You, you _

_I want to be your girlfriend _

"You're so fine

I want you mine

You're so delicious

I think about you all the time

You're so addictive

Don't you know what I can do

To make you feel all right?" She jumped around singing along with the lyrics.

_Don't pretend _

_I think you know _

_I'm damn precious _

"And, hell yeah! I'm the motherfuckin' princess!"

Zed laughed and spun her around, before pulling her in closer to him.

_I can tell you like me too_

_And you know I'm right _

_She's like so, whatever _

_You could do so much better _

"I think we should get together now

And that's what everyone's talkin' about!" She kept her back to him, their hands intertwined while their hips moved along with the beat.

_Hey, hey _

_You, you _

_I don't like your girlfriend _

_No way, no way _

_I think you need a new one _

"I can see the way

I see the way you look at me

And even when you look away

I know you think of me

I know you talk about me all the time

Again and again

So come over here

and tell me what I want to hear

Better yet, make your girlfriend disappear

I don't wanna hear you say her name ever again…

In a second you'll be wrapped around my finger

Cause I can, 'cause I can do it better!"

He spun her around so she was facing him, holding her close enough that she could feel how hard he was.

_There's no other, so when's it gonna sink in?_

_She's so stupid _

_What the hell were you thinkin'?_

She stared into his eyes as they danced against each other.

_Hey, hey _

_You, you _

_I don't like your girlfriend _

_No way, no way _

Her mind was all over the place. She kept trying to remind herself that they were just friends. But his lips looked so kissable. All she'd have to do is close the small gap between them. She smiled and looked away.

_I think you need a new one _

_Hey, hey _

_You, you _

_I know that you like me _

"What's wrong?" The feel of his whispered breath against her ear made a warm tingle spread through her body.

_No way, no way _

_No, it's not a secret _

_Hey, hey _

_You, you _

"Nothing… I think I just need something to drink."

_I want to be your girlfriend _

_No way, no way _

_Hey, hey _

_You, you _

He tucked her under his arm. "Well, let's get something to drink then."

_I don't like your girlfriend_

"I don't you know," she whispered into his ear as they made their way across the yard to the bar.

"Don't what..."

"Like your girlfriend." The ecstasy coursing through her making her even more confident than usual as she ran her nose along the side of his face. "I think you could do so much better."

He stopped walking and turned her so she was facing him again. His hands were in her hair, twirling circles on the back of her neck. "Is that so..."

She nodded her head as she leaned further into his touch.

He leaned down and lightly nipped her ear. "Any suggestions?"

She smiled at the feeling. "Wouldn't you like to know..."

"I would… But, I think maybe we should have this conversation when we can be sure it's not the X talking..." He nuzzled his nose to her, stealing a soft peck.

Her breath caught for the millionth time that night. "But I don't want to wait..." she stuck out her bottom lip in a pout.

"Awww, come here, Baby," he winked, gathering her into his arms and kissing her cheek as they sat down. "That pout is lethal."

"Baby, huh?" she giggled. She inched closer to his lips, easing her way onto his lap. "Careful there, Jacobs… a girl could get used to that." Her nose touched his. "Hi..." She could tell her face was going to hurt in the morning with how much smiling she was doing tonight.

He pushed her hair away from her face. "You're so beautiful..." He pulled her chin closer as his other hand snuck under her skirt, grabbing onto her ass.

The contact made her tingle from head to toe. She leaned in and nipped his soft lips, silently hoping he'd deepen the kiss.

"There you two are!" Bree yelled from across the bar. She quickly made her way over to them. "I've been looking everywhere! The band is about to play! Come on!"

"But our drinks!" Addison pouted.

Zed ran his nose along the side of her face. "I'll get the drinks and meet you over there." He palmed her ass once more before helping her to her feet.

Addison followed Bree through the crowd, meeting up with Mason in the front row against the stage. As the music started, her hips started to sway.

_Here we go again _

_I kinda wanna be more than friends _

_So take it easy on me _

_I'm afraid you're never satisfied _

Zed walked up and stood behind her, possessively wrapping his arms around her waist. He leaned down and brushed a soft kiss on her cheek. "Here… drink this."

"What is it?"

"Tequila and orange juice. The vitamin C will boost the X."

_Here we go again _

_We're sick like animals _

_We play pretend _

_You're just a cannibal _

_And I'm afraid I won't get out alive _

_No, I won't sleep tonight _

She knocked back the drink quickly.

"Damn… want mine too? It's vodka though..."

She licked her lips and shook her head, no.

_Oh, oh _

_I want some more _

_Oh, oh _

_What are you waitin' for?_

_Take a bite of my heart tonight_

Her arm came up and wrapped around his neck holding him against her as they moved with the music.

_Here we are again _

_I feel the chemicals kickin' in _

_It's getting heavier _

_I wanna run and hide _

_I wanna run and hide _

_I do it every time _

_You're killin' me now _

_And I won't be denied by you _

_The animal inside of you _

Addison looked to her left to see Bree and Mason completely enthralled with the show. She turned her head to look up at Zed and bit her lip. She wanted him. Every cell in her body screamed to feel his lips on her again.

_Oh, oh_

_I want some more _

_Oh, oh _

_What are you waitin' for?_

_Take a bite of my heart tonight _

_Oh, oh _

_I want some more _

_Oh, oh _

_What are you waitin' for?_

_What are you waitin' for? _

_Say goodbye to my heart tonight _

They stared into each other's eyes, neither of them able to look away. The magnetic pull between them intensifying.

_Hush, hush, the world is quiet _

_Hush, hush we both can't fight it _

_It's us that made this mess _

_Why can't you understand? _

_Whoa, I won't sleep tonight _

_I won't sleep tonight _

"Fuck it...it's my birthday." She laced her fingers in his hair and pulled him down to her, moaning as his tongue invaded her mouth. Her whole body coming alive under his touch.

_Here we go again _

She could feel Zed moan into her mouth as he bent her back. "Fuck, baby… I could kiss you all fucking night."

_Oh, oh_

_I want some more _

_Oh, oh _

_What are you waitin' for?_

She licked her lips, savoring his taste. "Then do it..." she whispered breathlessly.

_Take a bite of my heart tonight..._

.

* * *

Addison woke with a sudden start. She sat up and ran her hands through her hair in frustration. "Stupid fucking dreams." She grabbed her phone from its spot on the small shelf next to her and looked at the clock. 10 am, no use in trying to go back to sleep at this point. "Fuck..." She slid Zed's black t-shirt off over her head and pulled on an old Runaways vintage shirt and a pair of ripped jeans before climbing out of her bunk and making her way into the kitchen at the back of the bus.

"There's the birthday girl!" Bucky whispered as she made her way over to the liquor cabinet.

She rolled her eyes and shushed him. "Remember, we're not saying anything about that." She uncapped the tequila and took a long swig, embracing the burn down the back of her throat. "

"Little early for tequila, don't you think?"

"Ever heard of a tequila sunrise?"

"Yeah...that has orange juice and grenadine..."

She shrugged and took another swig. "I prefer mine straight… I'm a purist like that… Where is everyone else?"

Bucky took the bottle from her and placed it back in the cabinet before handing her a mug of coffee instead. "E went to go grab breakfast down the street, everyone else is still sleeping. Back to the birthday topic..."

"Which we are not acknowledging..."

He rolled his eyes. "You had a package arrive at the venue yesterday. It was here when we pulled up this morning," he motioned over to a large box sitting on the table.

She walked over and read the label. "It's from Bree!" She quickly tore it open and removed the tissue paper.

"What is it?" Bucky asked, trying to peer over her shoulder.

"I seriously have the best friend in the entire world!" she said excitedly as she pulled out several smaller white boxes. She opened one up and held up the contents from La Perla.

"Nope… didn't need to see that..."

"Oh, how I've missed this stuff!"

"You know, there's no reason you can't buy it yourself."

She turned and glared at him.

"And I'm dropping the conversation because I love you, and it's your birthday… Don't say I didn't give you anything."

She rolled her eyes. "Gee, thanks Brother-dear."

"Hey, I'm also giving you all day off tomorrow!"

"The schedule was made before I even joined the tour!" she poked her tongue out at him and continued to open the boxes.

"So what do you two have planned for tomorrow?" Bucky asked as he sat down at the table, carefully moving a piece of underwear with as little contact as possible.

"Don't know yet. I just wish she was flying in tonight so we'd have more time."

"Who?"

They both looked up to see Zed standing in the doorway.

Bucky stood up and refilled his coffee cup. "Casey's friend Bree is visiting. She's coming in tomorrow. So I expect everyone to be on their best behavior while she is here. Got it!"

Zed snapped a salute and moved out of the way as Bucky walked past him to the other end of the bus.

Deafening silence filled the small kitchen. Neither of them willing to break it first. The tension was thick in the air. Addison closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened them, he was gone. She shook her head and cursed under her breath, hastily repacking the gift boxes. She tossed the box onto her bunk and grabbed her cigarettes, heading for the exit.

She made her way across the parking lot, finding a cement bench a safe distance away from the bus. She lit a cigarette and called Bree.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Bree shouted.

"Thank you!" Addison giggled. "Damn, girl. The phone barely rang!"

"I knew you'd be calling soon."

"I just got your package! Seriously, you're the best!"

"Well, I figured you could use it. Lord knows you have a history of having it ripped to shreds."

"Ha. Ha…. You're funny."

"Speaking of which… how are things going with… well, you know who..."

"Ugh… I don't know whether I should be happy he's done nothing but ignore me for the two weeks since Strippergate or grab him by the shoulders and scream at him to notice me."

"Strippergate? Really? Is that what we're calling you drinking too much vodka, dancing on a pole, and, for what has got to be a first, unsuccessfully seducing Zed Jacobs?"

"At least I didn't end up pregnant this time… Fucking vodka."

"There's looking on the bright side."

"And to make matters worse, I've had to watch him night after night hook up with groupie after groupie. Half the time I can't even get on the goddamn bus after a show because he's tag-teaming some floozy with his bandmate!

"Are you telling me you haven't snagged an admiring fan or two since that night?"

She let out a quiet laugh. "I didn't say that."

Bree laughed on the other end of the line. "I swear, the two of you are insane." They were both silent for a moment before Bree spoke again. "Have you tried talking to him lately?"

Addison let out a loud sigh. "No."

"Adds, I really think you should… especially about P."

"Why would I Bree? He's the one that left. He gave up any right to know anything when he sent me that letter," she was trying to fight off tears. "And now it's nothing but radio silence." She took a drag of her cigarette and tried to collect herself. "Bree… I shouldn't want him anymore. I should hate him. But..." she practically whispered, not trusting her voice to not crack.

"I know."

She wiped her eyes. "Please tell me you're still coming tomorrow? I need a day away from this mess."

"I will be there! My flight will be getting in bright and early tomorrow morning."

"Thank you!" she sighed in relief.

"CASEY! MEETING TIME!"

Addison looked up to see Tracey hanging out of one of the windows on the bus, waving wildly at her. She waved back and dropped her cigarette to the ground before putting it out with the toe of her boot.

"Looks like everyone's awake. Guess I have to go participate in yet another thrilling band meeting before rehearsals. I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you then, Adds! Happy Birthday, girl!"

"Thanks, Bree." She hung up the phone and shoved it into her pocket as she took off back towards the bus.

* * *

Addison couldn't take it anymore. She stole another glance to the couch where Zed was sitting. Two overly made up surgically enhanced bimbos were basically in his lap. She kept waiting, hoping that he would glance her way. But tonight's groupie selection had his undivided attention. For the first time, she was completely off Zed's radar.

"I'm out for the night, B" Addison said to Bucky as she passed him in the hall.

He grabbed her arm, pulling her back to him. "You okay?"

She nodded, not trusting her words.

"Okay… I'll see you in the morning. I have my cell if you need me."

She nodded again and forced a smile before making her way through the venue to the parking lot. She took a deep breath, allowing the cold night air to fill her lungs. She lit a cigarette and stared up at the cloud-filled night sky. It was her birthday, and she was by herself. With a heavy sigh, she started towards the bar down the street.

* * *

"Why the long face?" the bartender asked as he tossed a stained white towel over his shoulder and leaned across the nicked wood of the bar.

"The short version?" she asked, stirring her tequila and perrier with her calloused index finger before licking it clean. "I'm stuck pretending to be someone I'm not, while also being stuck watching my ex, who's done nothing but ignore me for two weeks, hook up with any skank with a pulse." She held the glass up in a mock toast before knocking it back in one smooth gulp. "And today is my birthday. I'm officially twenty-four and have no idea what I'm doing."

"Well, no one should be celebrating alone," he said with a large smile. He reached down and pulled out two shot glasses and a bottle of tequila, pouring a shot for each of them. "Especially a pretty girl like you."

Twenty minutes, and a nearly empty bottle later, the bartender brushed a stray piece of hair away from Addison's face. "You know, good girls don't normally finish off a bottle of tequila with a complete stranger."

"Well, lucky for you, I'm not a good girl..." she threw him a wink and slammed her last shot down on the bar before busting out a rhythm on the hard wooden surface with her palms. She wiggled her ass on the stool, putting her back and hips into it. Words surfed along her brain waves as she hummed, mumbling bits and pieces.

"That sounds like a song," he whispered inching closer to her from across the bar for a kiss.

"That's because it is," she smiled, pushing him away. She stood up and jumped on the bar, grinding her hips and putting her years of training to good use. She grabbed an empty beer bottle off the bar and used it as a microphone as she began to belt out the lyrics running through her.

"I've been a-dancing in a devil's dirt

I'm a whole lot of trouble in an itty-bitty skirt

Well, the best kind of loving is the one that hurts

You can get your kiss, but I'll get my purse

I can take you down when the damn get wild

There's a whole lot of sinning but they're greener for miles

Three hits on the 6, there's a number that you dial

You can be like me but I'm a real brat child

I do what he good girls don't

I do what the good girls don't

I do what the good girls should never ever, never ever do

Hey, hey, hey

Since I'm gonna go to hell anyway

I'll go out with a bang, bang, bang

Crash and burn it all away

Well, I walked in the light and I lived in the sun

Now I die for the night 'cause the days are done

I kissed a couple of angels but it wasn't much fun

So I shake, shake, shake it with an evil tongue

I do what he good girls don't

I do what the good girls don't

I do what the good girls should never ever, never ever do

Hey, hey, hey

Since I'm gonna go to hell anyway

I'll go out with a bang, bang, bang

Crash and burn it all away..."

When the song came to an end, claps and cheers and whistles warmed the room. A bead of sweat rolled down her cheek. "Thank you guys for coming out. You've been great!" she joked before taking a bow. She jumped off the bar and sat back down.

"That was quite the performance," the bartender smiled over to her, grabbing another bottle and pouring her another drink. "You ever think about being a singer?" The sound of the door opening caught his attention as a loud group of fresh customers walked in. "I'll be right back..."

Addison took a large sip of her tequila and wiped the sweat off her forehead.

"I thought he'd never leave," a deep familiar voice said from behind her.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this weeks chapter. Drop me a review and let me know!**

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**(Yes, I know there was A LOT)**

**Criminal, Fiona Apple**

**New, No Doubt**

**Girlfriend, Avril Lavigne**

**Animal, Neon Trees**

**Good Girls, Elle King**


	16. Map of the Problematique

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

* * *

**Chapter 16**

**MAP OF THE PROBLEMATIQUE**

_**2 weeks earlier…**_

"Goodnight, Beautiful," he whispered, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. As he climbed down he heard her whisper his name.

"Zed..."

"I'm right here."

She breathed out a soft sigh. "...Forever..."

His breath caught as he watched her smile in her sleep. With his heart beating in his throat he leaned down and kissed her gently. "...and after." He took one last look at her peaceful sleeping face before climbing down from her bunk. He grabbed another shirt out of his and made his way to the door of the bus. He stepped out into the cool night air and lit a cigarette as he called Bonzo.

"Finished already?"

"Didn't even start… What was so fucking important?"

"Dude… you might want to meet me at the diner down the street… oh, and I'd start walking soon. The Acey's are heading back towards the bus."

Zed rolled his eyes. "Thanks for the heads up. I'll see you in a few." He hung up and started towards the diner they had gone to earlier that day. Luckily it was a short walk and he avoided running into anyone else. When he walked in, he spotted Bonzo sitting in the last booth against the back wall.

He slid in and nodded his head. "So…."

"Dude. First off… you more than owe me. I think I get a kidney, naming rights to your firstborn, and dibs on ANY girl we see from here on out."

"Was she that bad?"

Bonzo shook his head. "The sex was great… but I mean, it usually is with the crazy ones."

"Well, then what the hell are you talking about?"

"Coffee, Shoog?" a waitress asked, interrupting them.

Zed looked to Bonzo. "Am I going to need it?"

He held up his own cup for a refill. "Oh, yeah..."

Zed turned to the waitress. "I'll guess I'll take a cup as well."

"Oh, and you're buying me food," Bonzo added.

He rolled his eyes. "And two of whatever he's ordering."

"I ordered pancakes, right before you walked in."

"Fine… I'll take pancakes as well."

"Sure thing, Hunny," she said as she walked off to fill their order.

Zed turned back to Bonzo. "Start talking."

"It seems your affinity for a certain white-haired bassist hasn't exactly gone unnoticed."

"What do you mean?"

"Lacey might be acting nice, but the girl has got her claws ready to strike. She is seriously deranged."

"Still not following you on this."

"She knows something is off with 'Casey Jacobs'. She doesn't know exactly what, but she's looking."

"Looking at what?

"Google, Facebook, Instagram, snapchat, vine, tiktok… you name it, she's been searching. The girl might as well have a full conspiracy board laid out in her bunk. Red string, push pins, grainy black and white photos… the works," he laughed.

"This isn't funny..."

"You're right. It's not. Lacey is fucking psychotic. I wish you could have heard half the crazy shit I heard tonight."

"So does she actually know anything?"

"Not yet, but she's paying very close attention to the both of you. Like, concernedly so… I tried to throw her off by suggesting that 'Casey' was secretly sleeping with Bucky."

Zed snorted a humorless laugh. "Hell, I thought that until tonight myself."

"Where do you think I got the idea."

"Here you go, sweethearts. Two pancake platters," the waitress said, sliding their plates in front of them. "You let me know if you need anything else."

"Thank you," Bonzo said smiling up to her and throwing her a wink.

She blushed and walked off.

"Really?" Zed laughed.

"What?"

Zed rolled his eyes and dug into his pancakes. "You were saying… Addie, Bucky..."

"Right, right..." he took a bite of his pancakes before continuing. "So, that seemed to throw her off a little. But, man… she was asking some serious questions."

"Like..."

"Like, why can she not find anything on Casey Jacobs. How can Casey afford so many designer shoes? Why is Bucky always whispering with Casey? Why does Zed always stare at Casey? Why do Zed and Casey have similar tattoos… speaking of which, you guys have other similar tats? How did I not know this?"

"Because I didn't even know it until the other day. He flashed his wrist. "Same quote. We also have Gatsby tatts, and Beatles quotes."

"That's not THAT similar. Hell, everyone has Beatles quotes."

Zed shrugged before smiling.

"What's the grin for?" Bonzo asked with a mouth full of food.

"She's got an Alpha and Omega tattoo. That definitely appeared after we split."

"Religious?"

"Not in the slightest," he laughed. "It was one of our things. Alpha Omega, A and Z, the beginning and the end..."

"Awww… see, there's still hope."

Zed shrugged again, trying to keep his smile from spreading. "She did say she loved me, tonight."

Bonzo froze, fork mid-air. "Really?"

"Well, not in so many words… She said 'forever'… it was another one of our things. 'Forever and after'."

"Dude… this isn't good."

Zed's smile fell. "What do you mean? The girl I've spent the last seven years of my life being in love with might still feel the same… I'm pretty sure that's a good thing."

"Um… Lacey?"

"Fuck her… wait, bad choice of words. My dick is never going anywhere near her ever again."

"You're not listening to me, so I'm going to break this down as simple as I can… Lacey is nutso and obsessed with you. She will actually harm someone who she thinks you are seriously involved with."

Zed arched a brow. "Don't you think that's a little extreme?"

"No. I don't. Like I said, I got a whole earful in that bathroom earlier… not to mention she kept saying that 'Casey' looks familiar, but she just can't place it." Bonzo took another bite of his pancakes. "Any chance you had any photos lying around the apartment when psycho broke in and stayed the weekend?"

Zed shook his head. "No. The only picture I have left is the one in the locket."

Bonzo ran his hands through his hair and sighed. "Dude… I… I hate to even say this… but..." he sighed again. "If Lacey goes nuclear on Addison the band falls apart. Without the Acey's we don't have a tour. Without a tour..."

"We kiss the dream goodbye..." Zed finished, rolling his head back against the booth in frustration.

"Exactly… So… I guess what I'm saying is… maybe you should stay away from her? At least until things cool down with Lacey, or until you're ready to deal with the fallout."

Zed's head snapped back towards him. "But..."

"This isn't just about you anymore. This is all of our futures on the line." He leaned in and lowered his voice. "I know you still love her, and I know this sucks, but..."

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Fine."

"Z, I'm sorry..."

Zed stood up and dropped a few bills on the table before walking off.

* * *

Two weeks. Two weeks of ignoring her. Two weeks of watching her fake a smile when everyone was around, only to see the facade slip when they were gone. Two weeks of secretly listening to her play piano and sing the most heartbreakingly beautiful songs he had ever heard before every show. It was slowly driving him insane. All he wanted to do was talk to her, comfort her. Well, that was a small lie. He wanted to do a whole hell of a lot more to her, but he'd settle for talking. Today was going to be hell. Her birthday always was. Every year, it was the same feeling of loss and longing. But this year, he had to actually be near her. With a heavy sigh, he sat up in his bunk and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before opening his curtain and jumping down from his bunk.

As he made his way down the hallway towards the back of the bus, he could hear Bucky talking.

"Hey, I'm also giving you all day off tomorrow!"

"The schedule was made before I even joined the tour!"

He smiled when he heard Addison's voice.

"So what do you two have planned for tomorrow?"

That caught his attention. Who was she spending time with? Was it someone she was seeing? He stopped outside the doorway.

"Don't know yet. I just wish she was flying in tonight so we'd have more time."

He let out the breath he hadn't realized he was holding when he heard the word 'she' fall from her lips.

"Who?"

They both looked up to find him standing in the doorway.

Bucky stood up and refilled his coffee cup. "Casey's friend Bree is visiting. She's coming in tomorrow. So I expect everyone to be on their best behavior while she is here. Got it!"

He didn't know if he was nervous or excited to see Bree after all these years. She had been one of his best friends, but the last time he saw her wasn't the most pleasant memory. He snapped a salute and moved out of the way as Bucky walked past him to the other end of the bus.

Deafening silence filled the small kitchen. Neither of them willing to break it first. The tension was thick in the air. He watched as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It killed him to see her like this. He took a step towards her, just wanting to pull her into his arms and hold her, apologize for the way he'd been acting. But Bonzo's warning ran through his mind. He turned around and walked back to his bunk.

* * *

He did his best to not look in her direction during their band meeting. He kept waiting for Bucky to mention that it was her birthday so he'd have a valid excuse to talk to her, maybe even hug her. But it never came. When the meeting adjourned, they went their separate ways once more.  
Avoidance, secret glances, hurt. It was an endless cycle.  
He'd picked up on her schedule over the last couple weeks. Show days were always the same. Band meeting, workout, shower. Then she would slip away into the venue by herself for a while before rehearsals began. Today was no different. He made sure no one else was around before quietly following after her.  
He made his way through a dark hall backstage, unsure of where exactly he was going. When he heard the first scale of a piano being played he stopped walking. He silently sat down outside the door and listened as she started to play.

"I can't call you a stranger  
But I can't call you  
I know you

think that I erased you  
You may hate me but I can't hate you  
And I won't replace you..."

He sighed and rested his head against the wall.

"Tell me how to feel about you now  
Tell me how to feel about you now  
Oh, let me know  
Do I suffocate or let go?

You keep me up with your silence  
Take me down with your quiet  
Of all the weapons you fight with  
Your silence is the most violent..."

She suddenly stopped playing. He could hear the unmistakable sounds of her crying. He couldn't take it anymore. Something had to give. He stood up and walked back outside towards the bus.

* * *

"Fear, and panic in the air  
I want to be free  
From desolation and despair  
And I feel like everything I saw  
Is being swept away  
When I refuse to let you go  
I can't get it right  
Get it right  
Since I met you..." He leaned over and scribbled the lyrics into his notebook before starting to play again.

"Loneliness be over  
When will this loneliness be over  
Life will flash before my eyes  
So scattered almost  
I want to touch the other side  
And no one thinks they are to blame  
Why can't we see  
That when we bleed we bleed the same  
I can't get it right  
Get it right  
Since I met you

Loneliness be over  
When will this loneliness be over  
Loneliness be over  
When will this loneliness be over..."

"That has got to be some of the most depressing shit you have ever written," Bonzo said as he sat down on the bench seat next to him. "And that's saying something given the emo bullshit you've been writing lately."

"Bonz… I can't do it."

"What?"

"The whole 'ignoring her' thing. It's driving me out of my fucking mind. I know I'm hurting her!"

Bonzo arched his brow. "… And how do you know that?"

"...I may have been listening to her sing before stage rehearsals lately… The songs she's been writing..." he shook his head and sighed. "They're raw, and emotional, and so fucking good… but the hurt in her voice..."

"Dude…" Bonzo said seriously. "That's some next-level stalker shit, right there… Do I need to start worrying about you like I now worry about Lacey?"

"Shut up." He let out a heavy sigh and set his guitar down. "And worst of all, today's her birthday…"

"No way! Why didn't she say anything this morning during the band meeting?"

Zed shrugged. "I guess for the same reason she's going by Casey? How the hell am I supposed to know? You told me to stay away."

They were both silent for a moment before Bonzo spoke up. "Are you one hundred percent sure she's still in love with you?"

"No… But I know there's something still there. Listening to what she's been writing… Her 'forever' comment in her sleep…" he ran his hands through his hair and sighed again. "Maybe there's still hope."

"Well, what are you going to do about it?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, what's the plan to find out if she is or not?"

Zed gave him an odd look. "How am I supposed to do that if I have to stay away from her?"

Bonzo shrugged. "You're a smart guy, figure it out."

"Are you saying I can talk to her?"

"It's been like what? Two weeks?"

Zed nodded his head.

"Lacey hasn't gone completely off the rails yet… They seem to be getting along… Maybe she gave up the conspiracy theory." He shrugged again. "And quite frankly I'm running out of ways to cheer your moody ass up. I mean, that chick last night was HOT and you were barely going through the motions..."

Zed jumped to his feet and grabbed Bonzo, planting a loud kiss on his lips. "You're the best!"

"Save it for her, man. Just don't get caught," Bonzo laughed. "Now come on, we've got to get into hair and makeup before Eliza kills us."

Zed reached into his back pocket and pulled out his phone. "I'll catch up. I need to make a few phone calls first."

* * *

Anger coursed through his veins as he watched the bartender move in for a kiss. When he saw her push him away he couldn't help but smile. He was about to walk over towards her when she stood up and jumped onto the bar, grinding her hips and dancing. She grabbed an empty beer bottle off the bar and used it as a microphone as she began to sing. He sat and watched in awe. The spark was back in her eyes as she belted out the lyrics. "That's my girl..." he whispered to himself, unable to tear his eyes away from her.

When the song came to an end, claps and cheers and whistles warmed the room. Zed was on his feet, clapping with the rest of them.

"Thank you guys for coming out. You've been great!" she joked before taking a bow. She jumped off the bar and sat back down.

He watched as the bartender walked off to help a fresh batch of customers. Now was his shot. He took a deep breath and made his way over to her.

Addison took a large sip of her tequila and wiped the sweat off her forehead.

"I thought he'd never leave."

She spun around on the barstool, almost losing her balance. The sight before her made her mouth run dry. She licked the inside of her lip before pulling it between her teeth. "Jealous?"

"Yes," he said matter of factly.

"Good," she turned back around and smiled to herself as she took another sip.

Zed let out a soft laugh and sat down beside her. "I have to say Adds, you are looking particularly delicious this evening."

She rolled her eyes and fought back a smile. "What's wrong Z, run out of willing groupies tonight?"

He shrugged his shoulders and waved to get the bartenders attention.

"I see you've replaced me!" the bartender teased as he walked up to them.

"Hardly," she smiled sweetly. "This would be the ex."

Zed rolled his eyes. "Two more of whatever it is she's been drinking."

"Tequila and perrier with a tequila chaser?"

Zed shook his head. "Same old Addie...Change that to one of those, and I'll take a jack on the rocks."

"What's wrong, Z? Still can't handle tequila?" Addison challenged with a knowing smile.

He bit back a laugh. "Fine… I'll take a shot, too," he looked back to her as she knocked one back. "Actually, I think we're going to need a bottle," he said to the bartender.

The bartender nodded and went to make their drinks.

"Seriously though...shouldn't you be of defacing every flat surface of the tour bus with whatever bleach blonde bimbo flashed her rack at you tonight?" Addison smiled up to him. "You sure looked like you were enjoying the company backstage."

"First off, you of all people should know that I don't need a flat surface," he winked. "And... maybe I thought you shouldn't be alone on your birthday, Gorgeous."

"You remembered?"

He turned to face her and looked into her eyes with a serious expression across his face. "I remember everything about you, Addison."

"Yeah...well, I don't need sympathy company," she snapped turning her head away from him.

He grabbed her face gently and turned her back to him. "There's nowhere else I'd rather be."

The bartender returned with their drinks and placed them on the bar in front of them before being hailed by another patron. Zed picked up the shot of tequila. "Happy Birthday...make a wish..." he held it up and toasted. Addison reluctantly picked up her shot and clinked her glass with his before knocking it back in one smooth gulp.

Zed coughed. "Oh, God...Fucking tequila."

She couldn't help but laugh. "I was right...you still can't handle it."

He took a large swig of his Jack Daniels. "Ugh...It still tastes terrible..." He looked over to her and smiled. "But boy does it bring back some memories…."

"Like what?"

Zed scooted closer to her. "You really want to know?"

Addison didn't know if it was the large amount of alcohol she had consumed or his proximity, but her head began to swim. She bit her lip and nodded as she looked up at him through her lashes.

He tucked her long white hair behind her ear and leaned in close. "When I taste tequila….baby, I still see you… sky-high in Colorado, lips pressed against the bottle, screaming 'Baby, I'll never leave you'… I remember how bad I need you when I taste tequila," he sang quietly into her ear.

"Gods are you trouble," Addison whispered as she turned her face to look at him, her nose brushed against his cheek. "You make it hard to hate you."

"Did you make a birthday wish?"

She licked her lips and nodded.

"What'd you wish for?"

"Wouldn't you like to know..." she challenged with an arched brow, pouring out another round of shots and handing him one.

He took it from her and winced as he drank it. "I would… bet I can guess..." He pulled out his phone and wallet. He dropped a few bills down on the bar before grabbing the bottle of tequila and taking a long swig. He stood up and held his hand out for her.

"Where are we…" she suddenly tilted to the left as she stood up. She grabbed his outstretched hand for support. "going?"

"To make your birthday wish come true."

"And how do you know what I wished for?"

He pulled her in close. "So you don't want to be fucked so hard you can't remember your name?" he whispered in her ear before biting down hard. He knew he was taking a risk, but the soft moan she let out as her eyes fluttered closed spurred him on.

"We can't..."

"Why not?"

"You haven't even looked in my direction in weeks..."

"I swear, I didn't have a choice..."

"But you're talking to me now..."

"Because I'm tired of staying away..." He could see her resolve cracking.

"But...but… history? My contract...we already messed that one up..."

"Exactly…what's one more time?" his nose ran along the outside of her ear. "I know how you sound and feel when I'm buried deep inside you, fucking you like there's no tomorrow and you're screaming my name in abandon… I want you, Addison… I fucking need you."

"Fuck it...it's my birthday." She laced her fingers in his hair and pulled him down to her, moaning as his tongue invaded her mouth.

"I swear the only time tequila tastes good is on your tongue," he growled out. "My favorite fucking flavor..."

She bit her lip as he grabbed her hand and began to pull her away from the bar.

"Tough break, buddy," Zed called out to the bartender as they stumbled out the door.

Addison giggled and pulled him in for another sloppy kiss. "Where to?"

"Uber should be here any second." He handed her the bottle, which she opened and chugged, blocking the entire sidewalk.

An older man walking nearby reprimanded her. "You can't drink on the street. It's against the law."

She scowled at him and turned her face to the full moon above her. "Screw your drinking laws, whatever town we're in right now...I'm invincible!"

Zed laughed, swiping the bottle from her and taking a large swig of his own. A little of the liquor spilled from the corner of his mouth. Addison pulled his head down by the ears and licked it up. As she got a whiff of his cologne, her head started to spin faster.

He flashed her favorite smile and recapped the bottle. He took her by the hand and led her to the parked car on the corner that was waiting for them. They tumbled into the backseat, a mess of arms and legs and foggy tequila breath. His hand fell to her boob and squeezed.

She fumbled in the dark until she found his hard cock, stroking him as he attempted to tell the driver their destination. Addison dropped her head into his lap and slid her teeth along his hard length through his jeans. He adjusted in the seat and grabbed a fistful of her snow-white hair, guiding her mouth with expert precision. She suddenly stopped.

"Holy Fuck! Can you turn this up?" she asked the driver as she sat up.

"Big fan of T. Swift?" Zed asked confused as Trouble filled the car.

"It's the first time I've heard it on the radio. I wrote it."

"What?"

"I. Wrote. It."

"Bullshit."

"Nope!"

He pulls out his phone and pulled up the song info.

"Let me guess, you're looking for Addison Donnelly?" she laughed.

"It doesn't say, Meg Jacobs either."

"That's because Meg Jacobs and Addison Donnelly were both signed to Bamm!... Milo Taylor was not..."

He looked again, and sure enough, the writing credit was listed as Milo Taylor. "You swiped my middle name too?"

"It worked with Daddy's."

Zed continued to look, "Damn...you're quite the prolific songwriter."

"What can I say… nobody does heartache like Milo Taylor."

"Why aren't you singing them then?"

"That we're not talking about… In fact, I think I'm done talking." She straddled his lap and pulled him back in for a kiss.

His hands encircled her waist, one of them skimming down the inside of the back of her skirt. Two fingers slide into her from behind.

Addison gasped from the sudden pleasure of his fingers sliding in and out of her. The pressure building fast.

"Jesus Christ, I'm about to come in the back of this car," she moaned into his mouth. She yanked his arm from behind her and shoved one of his slick fingers into his mouth.

He made a show of licking her juices off of him, making her even wetter. "I lied...that...is my favorite fucking flavor."

Addison smiled and bent down to lick his other coated finger, sliding her tongue slowly up the digit until she reached the calloused pad of his middle finger. She pulled on the sensitive tip of his finger, then spiraled up and down the length, dragging a heavy exhale out of him. She maintained a steady vacuum as she licked the underside, looking into his eyes. "Your cock is next," she whispered. "I need to taste you too."

His smile widened. "God, you're wild."

"You know you love it."

"More than you know..."

The car rolled to a stop in a parking lot. "This the place?" the driver asked.

"Sure is, thanks man," he said opening the door and helping Addison out.

"We're at a hotel?"

He flashed her a smile. "I wasn't going to bring you back to the bus… come on, baby." He grabbed her hand and led her through the lobby towards the elevators.

"You already have a room?"

He shrugged and flashed her a smile.

"How'd you know I would say yes?"

"A man can dream..." he winked as the doors opened. He pushed her against the mirrored wall inside, forcing her arms to the glass and holding them tightly. His mouth crashed into hers—raw, starved, intent.

She rallied against him but couldn't budge. Another surge of heat rushed through her. He pressed his hard cock into the cradle of her hips, and she ground against it as his mouth claimed hers in a long, lingering, intense kiss. Addison gave up fighting. What was the point? She licked his bottom lip, and then bit down, moaning as her name became visible.

The doors slid open, and she guided him backward out of the elevator by the balls. "Where to, lover?" With a deep laugh, he scooped her up and threw her over his shoulder. She squealed and kicked, smacking his ass as they drunkenly made their way down the hall.

He fumbled with the key card for a moment, before the light turned green and he opened the door.

"Finally… a real bed..." she giggled as he tossed her playfully onto the mattress.

He laughed and leaned down kissing her so hard that he was sure he tasted blood. "Happy birthday, beautiful..."

She smiled the most breathtaking smile, making his breath catch. She sat up and wriggled out of her leather jacket, tossing it onto the floor. She unlaced her boots and kicked them aside before she stood up and grabbed the tequila. She downed a long swig, wincing as the burn ignited her throat. She set the liquor on the bedside table. With her back to him, she slowly pulled her shirt up and over her head, losing the dangling bra. She covered her chest coyly with her arms, turning to blow him a kiss. His dick was so hard she could see its outline from across the room. She snatched the bottle up and teased her nipples to attention with the butt end of the glass. Her other hand disappearing down the front of her skirt, as she started to finger herself. She brought her wet finger back up and coated her nipple until it was shiny.

Zed launched himself off the bed and latched on. He bit down on her nipple, teasing the metal bar with his teeth and tongue, driving her to the edge of madness.

Her head tilted up to the ceiling, clutching him harder to her chest. Hot, hurried breath on her already flushed skin. He yanked her skirt down, the snap protesting with a loud pop. She barely got off the next heartbeat before his tongue was on her clit. She sent up a silent thank you that she shaved down there earlier that day. He flicked her hood hard and fast. A pair of fingers getting involved as she hooked a leg around his neck.

"Fuck, I forgot how good you are..." she screamed out.

He flashed her a wicked grin before pulling on her piercing with his teeth. That's all she wrote. She hissed through clenched teeth as an orgasm hit her so hard, she lost her balance. To her surprise, she didn't fall. Zed had been holding her up the whole time. His arms like metal bands wrapped around her thigh and supporting her ass. He refused to stop, despite the climax. She smirked and shoved his head away. He went down on his back with a pleased grin, as she dropped on top of him.

"You wear entirely too many clothes for a drunk, horny woman to deal with..." Belt buckles, buttons, zippers, chains. "Fuck!" But hey, no underwear. That was rather hot. She clawed his clothing down to his ankles. She sat back and admired him in all his glory. A good ten inches. Nice and straight. Perfect. She opened wide and took his dick as deep as her throat would allow, making it to within an inch of his balls, as his body loosened.

"Fuck," he groaned. "I've missed that, so goddamn much..."

She smiled inwardly. Not letting that last inch won't go to waste, she flattened her tongue, which was clamped like a magnet to the underside of his length, and made room. She pushed forward, and her lips met his base. He grabbed her hair, twisting, and jerked. She maintained her position, slowly moving her tongue from side to side under his shaft. He released his breath, and tonsil fucking commenced. With each thrust, she took his cock all the way down. Swivel, suck, devour. Spit and pre-cum leaking from the corners of her mouth.

He looked down and met her eyes. "Fuck," he whimpered.

She pulled back and smiled. "Gladly. But let's have another drink first."

Naked and not afraid to flaunt it, she headed to the bathroom, snagging a towel, and grabbing the tequila on her way back. After smoothing the towel over the plush carpet, she laid down on it and spread her legs. With two fingers, she opened her pussy lips wide and poured in the tequila.

Zed didn't wait for an invitation. She closed her eyes and raked her fingers through his hair as he imbibed. He slurped loudly, purposefully like he wanted her to hear how much he was enjoying her. She tilted her hips to give him a better angle and forced her pussy hard against his mouth. He sucked her clit, ladling tequila from her cunt with his tongue. She was close to her breaking point again. She quickly sat up, needing him inside her.

He lunged for her mouth, pinning her to the floor with his body. His arm flailed beside them. Through their sloppy drunk bites and hisses, he managed to dump the contents of his pockets onto the ground. Addison grabbed a condom and tore it open with her teeth, spitting the wrapper aside. Zed sat up and watched as she rolled the rubber over the head of his cock. He resumed his position on top of her. His weight divine. The tequila bottle empty. The room spinning. She was invincible. She grabbed his latex-sheathed dick and stared into his eyes. "I want you to fuck me until you're ready to come. Then you're gonna pull out, and let me finish the job. You got it?"

He flashed his crooked cocky grin as she stroked a random tattoo. "Birthday girl gets, what the birthday girl wants..."

"Don't you forget it..." She was so wet, that he slid into her easily. "Damn, you feel amazing." She focused on the feeling, the raw sexual power darting between

them. He controlled the thrusts, but she controlled the climax. Just how she liked it.

Zed never broke eye contact as he banged her balls-deep. She ground her hips, pushing her tits against him, squeezing his dick. Her breath raced. His muscles twisted. "Do it, Adds. Come for me. Now."

The smooth mastery in his voice forced her hand. She couldn't hold on any longer. He owned her, and he knew it. She cursed under her breath. It wasn't fair. She didn't want to give up first. She wanted him to submit to her. Her clit succumbed to the pressure. Scales tipped. Reality wobbled. Tequila ruled. The orgasm rocked her from tits to stern, inside and out. Yowls burst from her mouth like a banshee cry. Riding her hard, he wore a triumphant grin as he ushered her orgasm to conclusion.

She pushed him off her onto his back. "Your turn," her voice was like used sandpaper. Sated, but not conquered. She ripped off the condom and put some elbow grease into jerking him off, covering the head of his cock with her hand. He reached up and clamped his thick, straining arms around her thighs and smiled. Hot jizz shot like a busted fire hydrant into the cup of her palm. When the last of his ejac evaced and her knees quit shaking, she laid her cheek on his shoulder. He put on an ovation-worthy performance, but she couldn't have him upstage her. The final power play was hers. She brought her hand to her mouth, opening wide, and swirled her tongue through his cream, sucking down every last drop. His salty cum erupted on her taste buds. She savored his flavor, committing it to memory, and swallowed.

He lifted an appreciative brow. "My wild girl… Happy birthday, Baby..." He smiled softly, before collapsing back down on the carpet.

The swirl of tequila, cum, and dopamine grabbed her by the hair and pulled her under, drowning her. She snatched a deep, full breath and passed out on his chest.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Sorry for the update delay! Hope you enjoyed the chapter, leave me a review and let me know!**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**-Tell Me How, Paramore**

**-Map of the Problematique, Muse**


	17. Under The Influence

**Chapter 17**

**UNDER THE INFLUENCE**

Sunlight and warmth. He'd spent so much time on the tour bus, he had almost forgotten what it felt like to wake up to the sun shining through a window. As for the warmth? He stole a glance down to where Addison was still sound asleep on his chest. He tightened his hold on her, breathing in the soft scent of her lingering perfume, committing every detail to memory.

How many times had he woken up with her in his arms and not taken the time to cherish every moment? Not nearly as many mornings as he had woken up wishing she were there. She fit perfectly into the crook of his arm. She always did. He tried to keep his breathing even as his emotions began to overwhelm him. If he had known the morning of his going away party that he would have to wait five years to wake up like this again, he would have never gotten out of bed that morning.

Five years. Five years of pain, mistakes, and life-altering decisions. But right at this moment, none of it mattered. She was in his arms again. He gently kissed the top of her head and closed his eyes, as her hand made its way to his hair.

_._

* * *

_Two things registered at once when Addison began to wake up. The first was that she wasn't on her usual side of the bed. The second was that the other side of her body was extremely warm. _

_Opening her eyes, she blinked in the light, before turning her head to see the figure slumbering beside her. Her breath caught as she saw Zed's face smoothed out in sleep. He looked so sexy as he shifted slightly, the arm across her waist tightening as his head moved to settle in the crook of her neck, his body pressed even tighter to hers. _

_She smiled to herself, loving the feel of him wrapped around her. Reality suddenly crashed through her brain. She quickly squeezed her eyes shut, begging to remember what they had done last night. They had both taken a tab of ecstasy at the start of her party. She could remember the feel of his hands running across her body, the feel of his lips as they kissed. God, he was a good kisser. She cracked one eye open and glanced down. She was still wearing the sparkly pink dress she had been wearing for the party. She discreetly moved her legs together, letting out a sigh of relief that she was still wearing her underwear and had not had sex. _

"_Oh thank goodness..." she quietly whispered to herself. If she were going to be reckless and ruin their friendship with sex, she at least wanted to be sober enough to remember it. She let out a soft sigh and gently ran her fingers through his untamed dark brown locks, closing her eyes and enjoying the moment. There was just something about him. He was the kind of guy that could inspire a lifetime of songs. Her eyes popped back open at the realization. She had feelings for him. Real, honest, raw feelings for him. Her mind went into a silent panic. No no no no no no no no….. She didn't catch feelings. She didn't get hung up on boys. She didn't need to try to get their attention. They did the chasing. She was Addison Fucking Donnelly! _

_The thoughts ran through her mind, even as she heard him snuffle against her neck, his leg moving across hers, literally trapping her against his body. Sighing, she allowed herself to sink back into his embrace, closing her eyes and breathing him in, willing her defenses to build back up. She could do this. Love isn't real. You can get the same feeling from consuming a large amount of chocolate. _

"_It's too early to look that concerned..." he whispered against her neck. _

"_What?" she figured he'd been awake for a while, based on his comment. _

"_You look stressed," he offered looking up at her. "What's wrong."_

_She almost confessed what she had been thinking. Instead, she smiled and ran her hand through his hair. "It's nothing… How'd you sleep?"_

"_Amazingly well… this bed is even more comfortable then the chairs we fell asleep on the other night."_

_They were both quiet for a moment before she whispered, "I'm sorry about last night."_

_He propped himself up on his elbow. "Why on earth are you sorry?"_

"_Because I asked you to roll with me? It wasn't fair to you. You have a girlfriend, and I get really touchy-feely when I take it… I should have warned you." _

"_Addison, look at me..." _

_She reluctantly met his eyes. _

"_I didn't do anything I didn't want to." He leaned in and placed a soft kiss on her lips. "Everyone gets touchy-feely when they roll. I knew what I was signing up for when I took it."_

_She kissed him back before gently pushing him away. "But your girlfriend..."_

_He sighed and nodded. "And this isn't fair to either of you… I'm sorry… I'll call her..." _

_Addison suddenly panicked again. "NO!"_

"_What?"_

_She hated what she was about to do. "Don't call her…I can keep a secret if you can."_

_A look of confusion crossed his face. "I thought..."_

"_Zed, we were both on X. We got a little carried away. I'd hate for you to throw your relationship away because of it…" she closed her eyes, forcing the next words out of her mouth. "We're just friends…."_

* * *

She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so content. She sleepily reached up and ran her hand through his soft untamed hair. Her eyes suddenly popped open. Last night hadn't been a dream. She really was wrapped in his arms. She looked up, taking in his face. It wasn't fair that he was still so damn sexy even after all these years. She never could control herself around him. She knew he was awake from the small smile on his lips he was obviously trying to hide. She closed her eyes and settled back into him. Allowing herself a moment of happiness before they had to deal with the harshness of reality.

"It's too early to look that concerned..."

She smiled against his chest. "Another birthday, another awkward morning after… kind of feels like deja vu..."

"Is this the part where you tell me that we're just friends?" he whispered, running his hand up her back and through her hair.

Addison melted into his chest further, loving his touch, despite his words. "We're not even that this time..."

He sighed heavily and held her closer. "We didn't realize just how uncomplicated things really were back then."

She snorted out a laugh. "No. We definitely did not. I wish things were as simple as dealing with a long-distance girlfriend…"

Zed took a deep breath. He had to take a chance. "I miss you, Adds."

"Z…."

He continued to run his hands through her hair. "I know things are super-weird between us, and we've got one hell of a past, but… I miss you in my life. You were never just my girlfriend. You were also my best friend."

"Zed..."

"Addison, all I'm asking is that we try to at least be friends again."

"We were never just friends," she whispered.

"But we tried."

She finally looked up into his eyes. "And look where it got us… Do we look like we're well-adjusted adults here?"

He bit back a laugh. "Not even in the slightest… but come on, Adds… we're going to be on this tour for another four and a half months…"

She rolled her eyes. "You really think we could be friends?"

He nodded his head and gave her the smile he knew she couldn't resist.

"Friends don't have crazy hot sloppy drunk sex."

"We all rebel where we can," he winked at her.

"Way to steal my line," she giggled.

He pulled her in for a soft kiss.

"Friends don't kiss either," she whispered against his lips.

"Fair enough… how about we give the whole 'friends' thing a try once we leave this room...Until then..." he rolled them over and leaned down, capturing her lips in a deep kiss.

Addison could barely think. The feel of his hand on her breast, and his other hand sliding up her inner thigh… Their tongues battled for dominance as she fought an internal battle. Her world had been in ruins for so long because of him, but right now everything felt so right. He tugged on her piercing before sliding his fingers inside her. With a loud moan, she gave herself over to desire. She could hate herself later.

.

* * *

Addison checked her reflection in the bus door one final time before opening it and climbing up the stairs. "Hello…."

"Back here!" Bucky shouted.

She took a deep breath and made her way to the small kitchen at the back of the bus.

"At least it was a nice morning for a walk of shame," a familiar voice said as she walked in.

"Bitch, There's no shame in my game, I stride with pride, thank you very much," she snapped back before breaking into laughter and hugging her best friend. "I'm so glad you're here."

"Me too, girl… But you might want to take a shower. You reek of sex, tequila and..." she sniffed Addison's shoulder, "Dior?" she mouthed giving Addison a knowing smirk as she shook her head.

Addison just smiled and shrugged.

"Really? I don't want to hear that shit..." Bucky chimed in.

They both flipped him off.

"Where is everyone?"

"Here and there," he shrugged. "E went to go grab breakfast, I'm going to go meet up with her at the gym when I'm done here... no one else is back yet."

"Ok, go shower while I finish cutting your idiot step-brother's hair..."

"I heard that!"

"You were supposed to…" Bree responded sweetly before turning back towards Addison. "But don't wash your hair."

"Yes, ma'am."

Bree hugged her. "Happy birthday, Adds!"

"It's Casey!" Bucky called over.

Addison rolled her eyes. "Thanks. I'll be back in a few."

"Oh! And you're guitars are on your bunk."

Addison's eyes lit up. "YES! THANK YOU!" She squeezed Bree harder and smacked a loud kiss on her lips.

"Eww… I don't know where your mouth has been!"

"Yes you do," she teased as Bree broke into a fit of laughter.

"I think I'm going to be sick..."

They both turned to Bucky and flipped him off again.

"God, have I missed you!" Bree smiled. "Now, go shower!"

* * *

Addison rested her head against the wall of the shower as the warm spray hit her skin. Flashes of the night before running through her head. Her head, body, and heart were at war. With a heavy sigh, she grabbed her shower gel, humming a tune as she started to wash him off her skin.

"Just another morning

With shaky hands, pounding head

I guess I did it again

Try to leave, but I can't stand

Start to think that I'm better off dead

I'm sick of this condition

Your kiss is my addiction

I can tell you cast a spell that knows no moderation

It's dangerous, the things we do

Under the influence, I got no defense

It might be criminal, but still, I just can't quit

Under the influence, I'll take the consequence

Well if it's poisonous, let it take my last breath

Under the influence..." She smiled to herself and started to rinse off.

"Temptation, creeping up on me

Gets under my skin, won't let me be

Haunt my days and haunt my sleep, viciously unrelenting

Oh, lay down again

Oh, give in again

And oh, feel good again

Begging for another beautiful sin

It's dangerous, the things we do

Under the influence, the walls are closing in

It's inevitable, but I can't seem to live without

the destruction of your love

Oh, oh

Under the influence, I'll take the consequence

Well if it's poisonous, let it take my last breath

Under the influence, I got no defense

It might be criminal, but still I just can't quit..."

She had just leaned down to turn the water off when the shower curtain was thrown open.

"Oh. My. God! YOU SING?!"

"Ahhh! Tracey! Damnit! You almost gave me a heart attack!" she panted out, clutching her chest. "I didn't think anyone else was here!"

"Sorry, honey! Just got back... But DAMMMMM you have a voice!"

She pointed behind him. "Towel… please?"

He reached behind himself and grabbed her towel off of the hook, handing it to her. "Seriously, Casey… and don't you dare repeat this, because I will deny the ever-living fuck out of it, but you have the voice of a goddamn angel and you need to be singing with us."

"Yeah…." she said wrapping the towel around herself. "I'm sure Lacey would just love that one… besides… I don't sing in public."

"Why the hell not? I sing on stage every night and you're soooo much better than me."

She shrugged. "I just… don't. So…"

He gave her a disappointed look. "You know, secrets don't make sisters. Spill it woman."

"Nothing to spill. I just don't like being the center of attention."

"Mmhmm… not buying it."

"Tracey..."

"Casey..." he countered back.

She sighed and rolled her eyes. "Doesn't matter. Lacey is the lead singer, and you're the only one who is allowed to sing back up or share her spotlight. And quite honestly, I'm fine with that."

Tracey held his hands up in mock surrender. "Whatever you have to tell yourself, Dollface. I'll get it out of you eventually…" He pretended to ponder for a moment. "What if I tell you what happened with Zed?" he whispered.

Addison laughed. "You already owe me that story. Several times over. Speaking of which, did you return the Chanel combat boots you swiped yesterday?

"I did. They were fabulous!"

"And my Chanel sunnies?"

He bit back a laugh. "I may still have those..."

She rolled her eyes and smiled pointing to the small counter beside him, "Can you hand me my clothes?"

"Oh, sorry… I know I'm in the way…" he leaned over and let out a gasp, picking up a sheer black lace bra. "Oh. My god..."

"NO! I draw the line at my La Perla," she laughed, snatching it from him.

"I swear, next to signing a record deal, spending a day raiding your non-touring closet is my dream!"

Addison laughed again, "I'll have to remember that if we ever make it to LA."

* * *

"Please tell me those are your special birthday brownies..." Zed said making Bree's head snap up.

"Boy, you better stay away from me and my brownies with your chia pet looking self."

He walked further into the room and pulled her into a hug. "Missed you too."

Bree narrowed her eyes and lowered her voice. "You've been on my shit list for a loooong time, Jacobs. Don't push your luck."

He rolled his eyes and released her. "Don't call me that."

"You know, I've had just about enough of the both of you not owning your own goddamn names. I know what my girl has gone through, and I'm assuming you've been through some shit too… fucking army…how the fuck did that happen... but Jesus Christ!"

He shook his head and smiled. "Same old Bree."

"Damn straight." She opened the Tupperware dish and offered him a brownie.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome… Be careful, they're strong."

"Even better," he laughed before taking a bite. He let out a loud moan. "Oh, man… these are even better than the batch you made for my nineteenth."

"How do you even remember that?" she smiled.

He shrugged. "It was a memorable night."

"So… speaking of birthdays," she said placing the container on the counter. "How'd you like her present I sent."

His eyes widened in surprise. "What are you..."

"Don't even… The only time I've ever seen her smile the way she was this morning was when you two were together… and she smelled like your cologne." She leaned over and smelled his shoulder. "Mmhmm… and you smell like her."

"That could be anyone's perfume..."

"How many people our age wear Chanel no.5?"

He smiled wide. "So, I'm assuming I have you to thank for the La Perla she was wearing then?"

Bree coyly smiled and shrugged her shoulders.

"What are you up to..."

"Don't know what you're talking about Z."

"Right…."

"Yo, Z! You here?" Bonzo called out from the hallway.

"Back here, man!"

Bonzo walked into the kitchen and smiled. "Didn't know you had company..."

"Goddamnit. The bad green continues! What the hell did you two do? Dye your hair with Kool-Aid?! I mean you're gorgeous, but come on!"

Zed laughed. "Bonz, this is Bree."

His head snapped towards Zed. "Bree? As in from high school Bree?"

"Yup… the one and only."

"I've heard a lot about you..." Bonzo smiled over to her. "But he forgot to mention how beautiful you are."

Zed rolled his eyes. "Sorry…" He turned to look at Bree. "B, this is James Bonzo. Former bunkmate in the army, and current bassist for Zombies. And he's obviously in on the secret."

Bree smiled as she stared into Bonzo's eyes. "Nice to meet you..."

"Um...Bree..." Zed said waving his hand in front of her face. "You have a little drool right there…." he wiped at the corner of her mouth.

She smacked his hand away. "Boy! Don't start with me. I'm playing nice right now, but don't think I'm not still pissed the fuck off at you."

Bonzo laughed. "I like this one…"

Zed rolled his eyes again.

"So, Bree… What do you do for a living?" Bonzo said, ignoring Zed.

"I own an overpriced extravagant hair salon in downtown LA."

"Well, that explains the hair criticism," Zed mumbled.

"Don't think I'm not fixing that shit either. Adds...fuck… I mean 'Casey'..."

Zed shook his head and smiled. "It's easier to just call her Princess."

"Princess?" Bree let out a laugh. "Boy, is that fitting."

"Right?" Zed laughed. "You can thank Eliza for that one."

"Oh, god… does she have bad green hair too?"

"We all did it together," Bonzo shrugged.

Bree rolled her eyes. "Anyway, she's in the shower now, but I'm about to re-bleach her roots. I might as well mix more and fix all of you too."

"How did you end up owning a salon? I thought you were going to USC for design?" Zed asked as he walked over and grabbed a bag of chips from the cabinet.

She shrugged. "Some things came up and shit hit the fan, so Mase and I decided to take a break from school… worked out in the end… at least for us anyway."

"How's Mason doing these days?"

"He's doing really well..."

"What's going on in here?"

They all looked over to find Addison and Tracey standing in the doorway.

"I was just telling the guys here that I was going to fix their hair… you could have given me a warning that they looked like they rubbed their heads in grass… At least this one has great hair!" she said motioning to Tracey.

Addison bit back a laugh. "Tracey, this is Bree, my bestie from back home. Bree, this is Tracey, my band bestie."

"Nice to meet you, Tracey. Glad my girl has someone so far from home."

"OOOh! The best friend! You have got to tell me about her closet!"

Bree laughed. "Which one?!"

"ANYWAY!" Addison shot her a warning glare, silently urging her to shut up. She walked further into the kitchen, immediately spotting the Tupperware container on the table. She let out a gasp. "Please tell me those are what I think they are!"

Bree smiled and nodded. "Of course! Like I wouldn't bring birthday brownies with me!"

"They're hella strong, too," Zed said around a mouthful of chips.

Addison turned to glare at him. "You had one of my birthday brownies before me?"

"Birthday?!" Tracey said storming over to her.

Addison froze mid-bite. She looked at everyone before shrugging. She swallowed the bite of brownie. "Um… yeah… it was yesterday."

"HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY CASEY!"

She smiled and shrugged again. "Brownie?" she offered, trying to change the subject.

"Don't think you can buy my forgiveness! We could have gone out and celebrated!"

"They're pot brownies?" she offered again.

Tracey looked at her in stunned silence for a moment before he broke into laughter. "Ok, fine… you can kind of buy my forgiveness..." he took one of the offered brownies. "But we're going out today!"

"Why?" Everyone in the room looked to the door, to where a very hungover looking Lacey and Stacey were standing.

"And who's the new chick?" Lacey added, nodding towards Bree.

"OMG! Yesterday was Casey's birthday! And she didn't even say anything!"

Stacey gave him a tired smile. "Shhh…. Too loud… And not everyone celebrates their birthday for an entire month, Tracey… Happy Birthday, Casey."

"Thank you," Addison smiled.

"If you'll excuse me… I have a date with my very dark bunk and a pair of noise-canceling headphones..." she said quietly as she turned around and walked off.

"This is my best friend, Bree. She came in for my birthday," Addison said to Lacey.

Lacey shocked everyone by walking in and hugging Addison tight. "I can't believe you didn't tell us it was your birthday! We definitely need to celebrate!"

"That's what I said!" Tracey laughed.

Lacey turned to Bree. "Please tell me you're hanging around for a while!"

"Um… only for today. I fly out on the red-eye."

Lacey frowned for a second before smiling. "Well, we'll just have to make the most of today then!" She turned to look back at Addison. "So… what's the plan!"

Addison shrugged and looked over to Bree. "We were about to re-bleach my hair… but after that?"

Tracey clapped excitedly, "Mexican and Margaritas!"

.

* * *

Addison was outside enjoying the peace and quiet as she let the violet toner in her hair work its magic. She had just lit a cigarette when she heard a set of heavy footsteps approaching from behind. She smiled to herself and took a fresh cigarette out and lit it before holding it up for him.

"How'd you know it was me?"

"Lucky guess..." She looked over to him and froze. She bit her lip and ran her tongue along the inside.

"See something you like, Gorgeous?" he teased throwing her a wink.

"In your dreams..." she smirked handing him the cigarette.

"Every night...over and over again..."

"Zed!" she smacked him and rolled her eyes. "Trouble…"

He laughed and sat down next to her. "Look at us, falling right back into the friendly banter shit..."

Addison shook her head and smiled. "Bree did a great job on your hair."

"Best cut I've had in a long time… not to mention the color is perfect."

"She's damn good at what she does. That's why half of Hollywood goes to see her."

"I think Bonz is smitten."

She bit back a laugh. "I think Bree is too."

"That explains why she just booted me out..."

They sat in comfortable silence for a few moments before Zed spoke again. "I think you need to know the reason I was avoiding you the last couple of weeks."

* * *

"So, he was keeping his distance because of Lacey?" Bree whispered as she pulled a flat iron through Addison's hair.

Addison nodded. "Yeah… He said that she was asking questions that could have led to her knowing that 'Casey Jacobs' doesn't really exist."

"Well, she's not wrong… It's cute that he was trying to protect you though."

Addison rolled her eyes and smiled. "He's trying to protect the tour..."

"Whatever you have to tell yourself."

She rolled her eyes again. "And we've agreed to try to be friends."

"Friends?"

"Yeah…Friends," she repeated, the word still not tasting right on her tongue.

"Righttttt….."

"Don't start."

"I'm not."

"Mmhmm… I've known you forever, B… just say what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking you two need to actually talk and by that I mean have more of a conversation than a few whispered words between moans."

Addison smiled and flipped her off. "You know I don't whisper… at least not during sex."

"You know what I mean. Try talking INSTEAD of having sex."

"We just did, thank you very much. And besides, we've been on this tour for almost a month and we've only slept together twice… well, three times if you count this morning."

"Adds, I'm serious… Now's your chance to finally get some answers… Put some demons to bed…"

"Bree..."

"And don't you think he should know about Penelope?"

"Bree!" Addison tried to peek down the hall to make sure they were still alone. When she was sure everyone was still upfront she turned in her chair to look at her best friend. "We've talked about this before! No. I don't think he should know… Not yet, anyway..." She sighed and closed her eyes. "I agreed to try to be friends… Not to pretend that everything has changed… I still don't trust him."

"But he's her father."

"And he used me… So..." she threw her hands up in the air. "Just because I can't seem to keep my traitorous vagina from letting him in, doesn't mean I'm letting him into the rest of my life… From here on out, we're just friends."

"Whatever you say..."

* * *

"Looks like we'll only need a table for six," Addison said as she closed the door of the van. "Stacey is still sleeping it off, and Bucky has 'manager shit' to do," she said using air quotes.

"What about, E?" Bonzo asked. "I thought she was getting ready?"

Addison shrugged as she tried to think of an excuse as to why Eliza would be staying behind that didn't involve spending 'quality time' with Bucky. "Um… female problems?" she offered, hoping they wouldn't press the issue further.

Bonzo and Zed both cringed. "Enough said..."

"I still don't get why you invited them in the first place," Lacey sneered.

Addison tried to keep herself from rolling her eyes. "Sorry, Lacey. It is my birthday. If we're celebrating, I'd like my friends to be there."

"Friends?"

She stole a quick glance over to Zed. "Yeah, friends."

"Whatever," Lacey mumbled under her breath as she pulled out her phone and started to check her social media.

* * *

The margaritas had been flowing for a few hours as they all sat around laughing and talking. After a rather embarrassing mariachi serenade that included the entire restaurant singing Happy Birthday, Tracey drug Addison onto the dance floor.

"So… Bree, right?" Lacey said as she sat down in the seat that Addison had just left.

Bree nodded.

"How long have you and Casey known each other?"

Bonzo elbowed Zed and tilted his head in their direction. No good could come from Lacey grilling Bree.

"Basically since birth."

"Really? That's awesome that you two are still friends… Where did you guys grow up?"

The conversation with Addison earlier that day ran through her mind. Maybe there really was something to Zed's concerns. "Southern California," she replied, trying to keep things as vague as possible.

Lacey obnoxiously giggled. "Well, I knew she was from California, but where specifically?"

"The Los Angeles area."

"So did you guys like go to school together too?"

Before Bree could answer, Tracey, interrupted. "Does anyone else want to dance?"

"What happened to Casey?" Lacey asked.

Tracey smiled. "Some hottie with a body asked if he could cut in… And since it's her birthday I selflessly declined so she could have some fun."

Zed's head snapped towards the dance floor. Without saying a word he downed his drink and got up from the table.

Tracey wiped his forehead. "Woo, that girl can dance."

Bree let out a laugh. "Sixteen years of training will do that."

Zed could feel the jealousy build in his chest as he made his way through the crowded dance floor towards them. With the liquid courage of a few margaritas coursing through his veins, he placed a hand on her waist and pulled her away. She spun almost effortlessly into his arms. The shock and surprise in her eyes quickly disappearing as a smile crossed her face. He knew the man she had been dancing with was saying something, but everything other than her in his arms faded away. As the song changed, he tightened his grip on her waist with his left hand as his right ran down her arm, taking her hand in his. Their eyes were locked as they started to move.

_I love it when you call me senorita _

_I wish I could pretend I didn't need ya _

_But every touch is ooh la la la _

_It's true, la la la _

_Ooh, I should be running _

_Ooh, you keep me coming for you_

Slow, slow, quick, quick, slow. Forward, forward, forward, left, together. The chemistry between them was palpable as they glided effortlessly across the floor.

_We danced for hours in the sand _

_Tequila sunrise _

_Her body fit right in my hands, la la la _

_It felt like ooh, la la la, yeah _

Addison was lost in the moment as she let him lead. The heated look in his eyes burning through her, igniting a fire deep within and melting her further into his embrace.

_Ooh, you know I love it when you call me senorita _

_I wish it wasn't so damn hard to leave ya _

_But every touch is ooh la la la _

_It's true, la la la _

_Ooh, I should be running_

_Ooh, you keep me coming for ya _

She pulled her lower lip in between her teeth and ran her tongue across his name. She could hear him swallow loudly before he dipped her low, running his down her body as he brought her back up.

_Locked in the hotel _

_There's just some things that never change _

_You say we're just friends _

_But friends don't know the way you taste, la la la _

'_Cause you know it's been a long time coming _

_Don't let me fall _

Bonzo nudged Bree's leg under the table to get her attention. He discreetly motioned towards the dance floor.

She quietly cursed under her breath. She looked over towards Lacey and Tracey who were thankfully deep in conversation. "Shit… I know that look… we're about to get Cabo part 2."

Bonzo's eyes widened. "I obviously don't know that whole story, but I know they were almost banned from the pool at the resort."

"Well, let's just say that the pool was a continuation of what started on the dance floor… If they're trying to keep their past a secret, they're about to blow it spectacularly."

"You take care of Tracey and I'll handle Lacey." Bonzo let out a deep sigh. "Please know that whatever is about to happen, I really didn't want to do it..." he placed a quick kiss on her cheek before standing up. "Lacey… what do you say you and I go somewhere a little more..." he swallowed, almost grimacing, "private..."

_Ooh, when your lips undress me _

_Hooked on your tongue _

_Ooh, love, your kiss is deadly _

_Don't stop _

Zed tightened his grip on her waist even more. The look she was giving him was quickly driving him over the edge of sanity.

_All along I've been coming for you _

_And I hope it meant something to you _

_Call my name, I'll be coming for you _

_Coming for you, coming for you, coming for you _

He ran his hand through her hair and held the back of her head as they danced even closer together.

_For you (ooh, she loves it when I come)_

_For you _

Their noses brushed together. Her eyes started to flutter closed.

_Ooh, I should be running _

_Ooh, you keep me coming for you_

"Can I cut in!"

They both suddenly looked to their right to see Bree dancing her way over to them with Tracey in tow.

* * *

"I really wish you didn't have to go back already," Addison whined as she helped her best friend load her bags into the back of the waiting car.

Bree let out a soft laugh. "It's probably a good thing I am. I may be able to party like a rockstar for a night, but I can not recover like one… work tomorrow is going to suuuuuuck…."

Addison smiled and hugged her. "Thank you for coming. I needed this."

"I'm glad I came out too," she stole a glance to where Bonzo and Zed were leaning against the bus.

"Did you get his number?"

Bree's smile widened. "Yeah."

Addison shook with silent laughter. "He's so totally the opposite of the kind of guy you usually go for."

"Maybe that's the attraction… and speaking of attraction..."

"Oh no, here it comes."

Bree rolled her eyes. "You two are still something else… Good luck with the 'friend' thing."

Addison flipped her off before laughing and pulling her back in for another hug. "Shoot me a text when you get back home."

"I will, girl." They closed the trunk and walked to the passenger side of the car. "You still coming home for Christmas?"

She nodded her head. "Yup. Christmas Eve with the wicked witch. Whether I want to or not."

"I'll see you then."

"Bree!" They both looked over to see Bonzo running towards them.

"I'll give you two some privacy," Addison whispered with a wink. She hugged her one final time and walked back towards the bus.

Bonzo slowed to a walk as he approached. "Would it be to forward of me if I drove with you to the airport?"

Her jaw dropped. "You wanna drive all the way to the airport just to have to come right back?"

"If it means I get to spend more time with you, yes."

She gave him a shy smile. "I'd love to spend more time with you."

"Well then…." he opened the rear passenger door for her. "After you."

When they got into the car they looked back towards the bus. Both of them laughing.

"Just friends my ass..." Bonzo mumbled. "I give it a week."

"Knowing them, they'll probably take months to admit anything to one another… But, hey! At least they're talking."

"So, were they always so… how should I put this…" he turned towards her, "completely oblivious to everyone else around them when they're together?" He asked with a laugh.

"So much worse," she giggled. "That little dance floor display tonight was nothing."

"Damn…"

"Yup… I swear the first time they met you could feel the electricity in the air. They were so in love it was sickening. Everyone thought they were going to be together forever. But then again, so did they," she sighed. "Every now and then someone will post a video or a picture of the two of them on our class Facebook page… always with the same 'whatever happened to these two?' question… It's no wonder she doesn't have any social media."

"Wait, there's video and pictures of them together?"

"Mmhmm… tons, if you know where to look." Bree pulled out her phone. "Give me a second… I know someone just posted something the other day..." she said as she scrolled through her phone. She handed it to him. "That was right before graduation. She had just started to work on her album and wanted to test out a song in the quad."

Bonzo took the phone from her and pressed play. The video showed a younger very blonde Addison standing on an outdoor stage.

"_Well you have me in, in your hands _

_Like a lit, like a lit cigarette _

_Now I'm here in your room hitting snooze _

_On the side of your bed _

_I should've known it the day we met _

_That shit is worse than a hit and run..."_

He pressed pause and looked up at Bree. "Holy shit, she can sing."

Bree smiled. "Yeah, she can...keep watching, Z makes an appearance."

He pressed play again and continued to watch.

"_My mom thinks I need therapy _

'_Cause I sing, only sing about you _

_But the thing is that she _

_Doesn't know how you do what you do _

_But you must do this to everyone..." _ she threw a wink to someone in the audience and bit her lip.

"_That shit is worse than a hit and run _

_I wanna waste all my love on you _

_I wanna waste all my love on you…" _Addison walked down the steps of the stage and over to someone in the front row of the audience, wrapping her free arm around his neck.

"_I wanna waste, yeah, yeah _

_I wanna waste, yeah, yeah..." _The camera panned around to the side to get a better view, revealing a much younger and happier Zed.

"_I wanna waste _

_My love on you..." _She quickly kissed him before climbing up on the table to continue the song.

"_When you leave my house, leave my car _

_Walk away from the restaurant _

_I admit I panic, I can't breathe _

_I bet you do this to everyone _

_And it's so cruel, but I'm having fun._

_I wanna waste all my love on you _

_I wanna waste all my love on you _

_I wanna waste, yeah, yeah _

_I wanna waste, yeah, yeah _

_I wanna waste _

_My love on you _

_My love on you _

_My love on you _

_My love..." _Bonzo let out a laugh as she was cut off by Zed jumping up onto the table, picking her up, and kissing her. Hoots and hollers could be heard from all around them.

"See what I mean?" Bree said with a sad smile on her lips.

"Wow… I'm pretty sure if anyone in my high school showed that much PDA, they would have been expelled" he laughed.

"Yeah, well they were Seabrook Highs golden couple, they never got more than a stern warning… you can keep looking. There's more on that page."

He continued to scroll through the posted pictures, stopping when he came upon one of them together. "What's this one from?"

Bree looked over his shoulder. "Looks like it's from HoCo, senior year."

"So that must have been right after he gave her the locket she's wearing."

"You know about the locket?"

Bonzo looked up and laughed. "Yeah… everyone in our platoon did. It's been attached to his dog tags for years."

"Wait… he has her locket?! How?!"

"...Yeah… It was in with the letter she sent breaking up with him."

Bree grabbed his shoulders. "Addison didn't mail him a goddamn thing! She got a letter from him breaking up with her."

"No… Zed has that letter memorized… She broke up with him."

"No… I've seen the letter he sent. He said he never loved her and was only using her for her connections."

Bonzo started to laugh again. "I'm sorry, but that's just funny. She ripped his heart out and said that she could never love him and was using him to piss her mom off."

"This doesn't make any sense… The cheating at the party, didn't make sense, the letter she got that Christmas didn't make sense…"

"He says he didn't cheat on her."

"I'm starting to believe that too… maybe she sent a letter after and didn't tell me..."

"Wait… you said she got the letter at Christmas?"

Bree nodded her head. "Yeah, why?"

"Zed and I spent Christmas in basic. He was already wearing the locket..."

She looked down at her watch. "I really wish I had more time to stay and try to sort this out. Those two need to fucking sort this out."

"That might be difficult with the whole Lacey situation."

"I do not trust that girl."

"Join the club," he laughed humorlessly. "Can't we just tell them that this doesn't pass the smell test?"

"You know Zed pretty well, right?"

"Yeah."

"So you know how stubborn he is, right?"

"Yeah..."

"Now double that and you've got Addie."

"Shit."

"Yeah..." Bree shook her head. "I swear those two are the most stubborn and clueless people I have ever known in my life. Love them to death, but still…" she sighed. "We need a plan… But more importantly, we need proof."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Thank you so much for all the love after the last chapter! I was more than a little apprehensive to go that far, but I'm glad I did. **

**Songs Used In This Chapter**

Under the Influence- Elle King

Senorita- Camilla Cabello, Shawn Mendes

Waste- Dove Cameron


	18. Hope Is A Dangerous Thing

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

**Chapter 18**

**HOPE IS A DANGEROUS THING**

_Zed sighed as he watched the water cascade down the back window of the record store. It was a rare stormy day in Los Angeles and there hadn't been a single customer all day. Mason had called in sick and Owen left early, leaving him alone and bored out of his skull. The only thing keeping him from going completely stir crazy were the sporadic sexts from Addison, and he hadn't even gotten one of those in over an hour. He checked his phone again. His last message was still on read. Stupid cheer practice. He shoved his phone back into his pocket and raked his hands through his hair in frustration. Suddenly the bell above the door chimed, alerting him of a customer. He walked to the front of the store to help whoever had decided to brave the weather. _

_He stopped dead in his tracks. There standing in the doorway was his beautiful girlfriend, dressed in a long gray raincoat, her hair falling in waves across her shoulders, red high heels peeking out from under the hem, smiling seductively at him. She bit her bottom lip and walked further into the store. _

_He went breathless as she moved towards him, her raincoat parting to give him a glimpse of something silky and red beneath. He could smell her perfume, could hear her soft, quick breathing, could see the heat in her eyes as she gave him a deliberate once over. _

"_I thought you were at cheer practice." He grinned. His body was aching to reach out and grab her, his desire growing as she walked closer._

"_I decided to call it early..." she whispered almost breathlessly. _

"_Oh yeah?"_

"_Yeah..."_

"_And why's that?" He swallowed loudly as she licked her lips. _

_She gave him the wickedest of smiles as she undid the tie of her coat to allow him a full view of the red negligee she had on underneath. She reached out and ran her fingertip gently from his shoulder down his arm. "Remind me what that last message you sent me said?"_

_He swallowed loudly again as her hand ran down the side of his face. "I'm sure it was a bit more eloquently worded, but I think it said something along the lines of, "If you were here I'd bend you over the sales counter and fuck you until my name was the only thing you could say..."_

"_Well..." she husked back, allowing her finger to edge close to his lips. "What are you waiting for?" she whispered as she pressed her lips to his._

_Without thinking of their current location, he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into him, opening his lips and deepening their kiss. The kiss went on and on, growing deeper and hotter with each second. _

_He moaned in regret suddenly dragging his mouth from hers, and she tightened her arms around his neck whimpering at the loss of contact. _

_He could see the frustration in her eyes, knowing she was wondering why he'd pulled back. He wondered himself as he watched her try to catch her breath, her chest heaving prettily, displaying her cleavage nicely as the low cut lingerie pulled tight across her breasts. Her eyes were wild with desire, her lips swollen with passion as she panted against him. _

_The sight was nearly enough to make him lose it right there, and he struggled for some form of control. He was at work, during business hours, anyone could walk in._

"_Adds, we can't right now?" he said, seeing a glint of stubbornness appear in her eyes. He really didn't want to stop but he had to at least try. _

_Without giving him a chance to continue protesting, she took a step away. He let out a small sigh of relief… or maybe it was regret… he couldn't tell. He thought she was backing off. He had never been more wrong. _

_Without breaking eye contact, she shrugged the raincoat completely off her body, letting it fall in a puddle at her feet. She shivered slightly as the cold air hi over her skin, tightening her nipples, and fluttering the red silk erotically against her body. _

"_You know you can't resist me..." she whispered sensuously._

_He watched her eyes darken as she let her hand wander along the curve of her neck and down to the swell of her breasts. _

_She smiled in triumph as she saw his eyes widen int realization of her intentions. She cupped her breast lightly in her hand, shivering as her fingertips brushed over her nipple. She let out a soft moan. Her eyes closed in bliss as she cupped her other breast, letting her fingers dance over her already hardened nipple and pulled on her piercing. She looked back into his eyes as she slid one hand down brushing lightly over the thin material covering her mound and pressed lightly against her clit. _

_He had tried. He really truly had tried to resist her. But before either of them could get off another breath, he had her locked in his arms, his mouth crushing hers as she hungrily returned his kiss. He molded her body to his as he thrust his leg between her thighs, groaning when he felt her wetness. _

"_Baby," he growled as he felt her hands slide down to cup his backside, pulling his hips even tighter against hers._

"_Zed, please," she moaned. She pulled his sweatshirt and t-shirt over his head, dropping them on the ground. Her hands immediately went for the button at his waist as he tried to help her undo them and push them down. She moaned again as she felt him through his boxers. His rock hard desire pressing insistently against her bare thigh. _

_He groaned low in his throat as he felt her arch against him, moving so her weeping center was rubbing directly against his hardness. He could feel how hot she was even through the thin material. _

"_Adds," he managed as he allowed his lips to slide across her neck, kissing and nipping a path over her collarbone and down to the curve of her breasts. "Baby, let's move this to the couch in the back office," he tried, surprised when she pulled back and shook her head. _

"_No, I want you to take me right here, right now, Zed," she whispered in a throaty voice, pulling herself reluctantly from his arms and walking back towards the sales counter. She smiled as his eyes widened at what she was suggesting. "Just like you said in your text..." she whispered as she lifted herself onto the counter and leaned back until she was spread out across it, her thighs parted shamelessly. "You. Me. Naked. Right where you work. Taking me quick and hard. Making me scream your name..." she purred._

"_God you are wild," he whispered in awe. "I'm so in love with you."_

"_I love you, too..." She ran a hand along the length of her body, "Forever..."_

_All sense of right and wrong flew out the window. He didn't care that he was at work. Or that anyone passing by on the street could see them through the glass storefront. He had to have her. With a low growl, he was on her, pressing his body against hers, pushing her back against the wood of the counter. He saw her eyes flame with passion and triumph as she wrapped her legs around his waist, thrusting her hips up to his, begging him to take her with broken words and frantic touches. _

_He buried his head against her breasts, taking one hardened nipple deep into his mouth through the silky material, nipping it with his teeth and then soothing the sting with his tongue. One hand stroked and pulled at her breast, giving it the same attention his mouth was paying to its twin. His other hand slid over her stomach, enjoying the way the soft silk felt against his fingers, but he was in search of another softer place. _

_He was past the point of patience as he ripped the thin red silk covering her. Her cry of pleasure echoed through the store as his fingers finally slid between her legs and he slipped two fingers deep inside her. She was so wet, so hot, for him. He twisted his fingers inside her, feeling his own desire ache unbearably as she shrieked and clenched her muscles tightly around him. _

_He was so involved in watching her, it came as a complete shock to suddenly feel her hand grasping him. She stroked him lightly through his boxers as her name fell from his lips. Bringing her other hand into play, she quickly pushed his boxers down his legs, moaning in delight as she held him full, hard and pulsing in her hand. _

_He groaned when he felt her hands suddenly leave his flesh and was reaching to bring them back when they locked on his hips pulling him down between her thighs. _

"_Zed… please, I need you inside me, now..." she moaned, pulling his body into perfect alignment with hers. _

_He threw her a wink and her favorite cocky, crooked smile, before retrieving a condom from his discarded jeans. He rolled it down his length. "Last chance to take this someplace more comfortable, Baby..."_

_She bit her lip and smiled. "Do your worst..."_

_He muttered a curse as he buried himself to the hilt in her warm willing body._

_ZZZZZZZZZZZ_

"_That was..." he shook his head and smiled. "...No words, Baby."_

_She smiled against his chest. "Definitely memorable."_

"_Definitely… How am I ever going to be able to make it through a shift without getting hard..." he let out a soft laugh._

"_I'll just have to come over and help you out again, sometime..."_

_He leaned down and kissed the top of her head before he sighed. "I need a cigarette."_

_She rolled her eyes and looked up at him. "Not to beat a dead horse..."_

"_Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know… I should cut back."_

_She hopped up from the counter and picked up her purse, tossing him a stick of Juicy Fruit before popping one in her mouth as well."_

"_Thank you, Baby."_

"_You're welcome..." she bent over and picked up the tattered shreds of red silk and smiled. "I don't think I'll be able to wear this home." _

"_Oops… Sorry, not sorry..." He let out a soft laugh and stood up grabbing his sweatshirt from off the ground. "Here, Gorgeous…"_

_She took it from him and slipped it over her head. "Okay...This thing is insanely comfortable. You know you're never getting this back, right?" she laughed. "… How do I look?"_

_He smiled and grabbed her by the waist. "Beautiful, like always… I have to say, Baby… I like seeing you in my clothes."_

"_More so than without the clothes?" she teased._

"_Uh, that would be a negative… If I had it my way we'd always be naked," he threw her a wink and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "But seeing you in my sweatshirt…" he shook his head and smiled. "Let's everyone know you're mine."_

"_If only it said 'Property of Zed' instead of 'Seattle Prep'," she giggled._

"_And now I know what I'm getting you for Christmas."_

_She rolled her eyes and stole a kiss. "Think I can get away with just this without the jacket?" _

"_I think so… It covers more than some of your dresses."_

"_Are you complaining about my hemlines?"_

"_Never!" he palmed her ass and smiled. "You know I love it when you show this thing off…" _

"_Says the boy who takes a swing at anyone he catches ogling," she teased with a smile. _

"_Can you blame me?" he bit his lip and arched his brow, "you up for another round, my wild girl?"_

_She let out a girly giggle. "Like you even needed to ask..."_

_ZZZZZZZZZZ_

The feel of her hands running down his chest felt so real. He let out a quiet moan.

"I knew you still wanted me..."

His eyes shot open. "What the…."

* * *

"_Zed...wake up…"_

"_Ten more minutes..." he mumbled as he grabbed her and pulled her into bed, snuggling his face into her neck. _

_She giggled and rolled them over, straddling him. "Nope. It's Monday… and since I had to fire my personal trainer this morning, I need a work-out buddy."_

_He cracked an eye open to look at her. She was already dressed in a sports bra and shorts with her long blonde hair in braided pig-tails. "What time is it?"_

"_6… I'm already behind schedule."_

"_Why'd you fire your trainer?"_

_She smiled and leaned down to kiss him. "Because I have you as my boyfriend."_

"_And your boyfriend needs sleep..." he whined, wrapping his arms around her and rolling them over. "You wore me out last night. Wasn't that enough of a work-out?"_

"_I promise I'll make it up to you..." she whispered seductively, biting his ear._

"_And I'm up," he smiled. "Well… at least a part of me is..."_

_She rolled her eyes and pushed his shoulder playfully. "Come on. I'm starting in five minutes with or without you."_

"_Fine, fine..." he mumbled as he rolled out of her bed. _

_Less than ten minutes later he met her in the foyer of her mother's house. "You know… If this is the wake-up call I can expect, I may have to reconsider future sleepovers," he teased as he knelt down to tie his tennis shoes. _

_She let out a soft laugh. "You wanted to be in a relationship with me."_

_He rolled his eyes and stood up, leaning down for a kiss. "You're lucky I lo...I adore you."_

"_I know," she smiled as she opened the front door and popped in her earbuds. "Down to the bottom of the hill and back… It's about two miles round trip… Try to keep up!" _

_ZZZZZZZZZZZ_

_Zed panted as he jogged back up to the entranceway. "How… do you do this… every. Damn. Day?"_

"_I don't..." she shrugged. "Just every other day."_

_He rolled his eyes at her. _

"_You know… maybe if you didn't finish off a pack of Marlboro's every week, you'd be able to keep up," she teased before tossing him a water bottle. _

"_Ha. Ha. Ha…"_

"_Come on… I still have to hit the gym."_

"_You're crazy, woman!"_

_She threw her head back and laughed. "Look, this body didn't happen by accident. Yes, I'm genetically blessed, but it also takes work…" she looked at him through her lashes. "But I guess if you don't want to help me stretch and spot me..." she stuck her bottom lip out ever so slightly._

"_Do not break out the pout, Baby," he whispered pulling her into him and kissing her. "You know_

_it's lethal..."_

_She smiled against his lips and took his hand in hers, dragging him down the hall to the home gym. As they walked in she flipped on the lights and tossed him her phone. "Can you hook that up to the speakers and press play?" she asked as she stood at one of the ballet bars and placed her leg on the top to stretch. _

_Zed walked across the room and placed her phone in the dock, pressing play. The second a familiar bass line started his head snapped over to her. "You work out to White Zombie?"_

_She smiled and nodded as she leaned over across her extended leg. _

_He stood there dumbfounded. _

"_What's wrong? Not a fan?"_

"_Actually, I'm a huge fan…" he said as he walked up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and placing a kiss at the base of her neck, "but their music usually makes me want to get my heart pumping in… different ways..." he whispered into her ear._

_She turned her head to look at him."Me too… And now you know why I fired my trainer." She bit her lip and pulled him down for a kiss._

ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Glass crashing and the sounds of yelling filled the bus, waking her. She sat up in her bunk and rubbed her eyes. "...the fuck..."

"You're a fucking asshole, Necrodopolus!"

"And you're a fucking psycho stalker!"

Addison rolled her eyes. In the two weeks since her birthday, Lacey and Zed's fighting had become almost a daily occurrence. "Fucking dream was just getting good..." she mumbled to herself as she climbed out of bed, still clad in her over-sized Seattle Prep sweatshirt.

Bonzo grabbed her leg as she made her way down. "Well that's certainly a view to wake up to..." he teased with a flirty wink.

She rolled her eyes. "Scoot over," she whispered, climbing into his bunk, much like she had most mornings lately. Bonzo was quickly becoming one of her favorite people. "How was the late-night face-time with Bree?"

"Judging from the sounds coming out of your bunk last night, probably as frustrating as your late-night movie watching."

"Hey!" she feigned offense.

"What? You don't want me to overhear, then try some headphones the next time you watch a BDSM film... And speaking of films…" he held up a finger to clarify, "not of the adult variety this time… can we not watch a horror movie the next night we're driving?"

Addison smiled. "Aww… what's wrong? Were you scared?" she teased.

"What? No… I just..."

She arched her brow.

"Okay, fine… I was a little scared."

She smiled even wider and hugged him. "Sorry, Bonz… It's October, which makes it spooky season. I don't make the rules, I just follow them… But I promise if it gets too scary next time, I'll stay up and watch Sponge Bob with you after."

"Thanks, Princess."

"You're welcome..." she patted his knee as he wrapped her up in a tight bear hug.

"Now if only cartoons could block out the sounds coming from your bunk..."

She playfully pushed him off and held up his arm. "You're one to talk... you might want to take it easy on your wrist, you need it to play."

He rolled his eyes and let out a laugh. "Same goes for you… pretty sure fingers are important for playing bass."

She smiled and flipped him off just as another glass crashed against the wall. "What are those two fighting about this time?"

"Who the hell knows."

"ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT!" Bucky screamed as he stormed down the hall. "BAND MEETING, NOW!"

She turned her face to Bonzo. "Here we go again..." she mumbled as she rolled out of his bunk and made her way into the small kitchen at the back of the bus.

ZZZZZZZZZ

The moment she walked through the door, Zed stood up a little straighter with a small smile crossing his face, completely ignoring the ass chewing he was getting from their manager. He couldn't help it. He loved seeing her wearing his old high school sweatshirt, especially since he knew she wasn't wearing anything underneath it.

"NECRODOPOLOUS! ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?!" Bucky yelled in his face.

He turned his attention back to Bucky, reluctantly breaking the eye contact he had with her. "Yeah, I'm listening… I'm not apologizing! I didn't come on to her! I was fucking sleeping! IN MY OWN BUNK!" he yelled over Bucky's shoulder towards Lacey. "She's the one that climbed in this morning!"

Addison's head whipped between them all, suddenly trying to figure out just what the hell was going on.

"Oh, this should be good," Tracey whispered from next to her.

"I sooo did not! He made the first move!"

"YOU FUCKING PSYCHO!"

"ENOUGH!" Bucky yelled "This shit has got to stop! I'm not going to play goddamn referee between you two! Last warning! You two keep this shit up, I'm pulling the fucking tour!"

"WHAT?! NO?!"

He held his hands up and shook his head. "I'm done. This shit ends now. Got it?"

They both mumbled their under their breaths, reluctantly agreeing.

"Good… now onto the next matter of business…" he turned and looked at everyone else that had gathered in the small kitchen. "I don't know what the hell is going on with everyone on this goddamn bus..." He shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. He turned and glared at Zed, "Between the fistfights after almost every show..." He turned back to everyone else, "You've got no energy," he said to Stacey. "You've been moping around like a lovesick puppy," he directed towards Bonzo. He skipped over Eliza and moved on to Addison and Tracey. "And why the hell haven't you guys written anything new lately?!"

"Don't look at me…" Addison held her hands up. "My job is to just play bass..."

"Maybe if one of our songs hadn't been stolen, we'd be a little more productive, Bucky!"

He threw his head back in frustration. "I swear to god..." He slowly turned around and glared at Lacey. "For the last time… move on or you're gone. Understood?"

"You wouldn't..."

"Try me," he sneered. "I'm sick and tired of the bullshit, Lacey. And I'm pretty sure I said I want EVERYONE writing!"

"It's MY band!" she snapped back.

"And I'm trying to help you! But I can only do so fucking much! At some point, you're going to have to figure out which is more important… the band, or your ego..." He ran a frustrated hand through his hair and sighed. "Acey's are opening tonight...Zombies, you're headlining..." Without another word, he walked out of the room and off the bus.

"Well..." Eliza said quietly. "This has been a fun meeting...I'm going to go..." she shrugged, "get some breakfast?" She made quick eye contact with Addison and shrugged again before taking off toward the exit.

The room was silent as the rest of them stood there.

"This is awkward..." Tracey whispered loudly.

"Yup..." Addison nodded. "I'm going to the gym… You guys..." she looked between Zed and Lacey. "… Never a dull moment around here..." she mumbled as she turned around and headed back to her bunk.

* * *

As she stood at the edge of the parking lot stretching, she could hear footsteps approaching from behind her. She didn't even have to look. She tried to hide her smile as he got closer.

"So, just how far is the gym from here?"

She turned around to find him wearing a white t-shirt, track pants and tennis shoes. It just wasn't fair for someone to look that hot. She shook her head slightly to clear her mind. "Um, about three miles… since when do you workout?"

"Are you kidding me? This body didn't just happen by accident..." he threw her a wink, making her smile. "But seriously, if I don't get away from this bus I'm liable to strangle Lacey."

"You're the one that dated her."

"We didn't date."

She rolled her eyes. "If you say so." She turned back around and continued to stretch.

"Not that I mind watching you bend over, but… when are we getting this show on the road?"

She stood up straight and looked back at him. "Once I'm good and… warmed up," she breathed out, popping the P at the end. "Shouldn't you be doing the same?"

He smiled and shook his head. "You should know I'm always ready," he said as he started to jog.

"Hey!" she snapped, jogging to catch up with him.

"What's wrong, Adds? Worried you won't be able to keep up?" he challenged, knowing it would rile her up.

"You're kidding, right?" she rolled her eyes and passed him. "The last time I checked, it was you that had trouble keeping up with me."

"How do you know I wasn't just trying to look at your ass?" he teased as he picked up the pace and smacked her butt as he passed. He turned around and winked before opening up into a full run.

She couldn't help the smile that broke across her face as she sped up.

By the time they reached the 24-hour gym chain they all used, she still hadn't fully caught up to him.

He shook his head in silent laughter as he leaned against the building waiting for her. "Maybe if you cut back on the cigarettes..."

She flipped him off. "I'm worried that if I quit smoking at this point I'd end up replacing nicotine with murder," she shook her head and smiled. "Since when do you run?"

"Military, remember? A couple of miles is nothing," he said as he opened the door for her.

She smirked as she walked past him and up to the receptionist counter. "Hi, does this location offer private sessions?"

Zed started to have a coughing fit. "Private trainer?"

Addison turned around and smiled. "Yeah… I've been a little... tense lately… nothing a good work out with some... one on one attention... won't fix..." she winked and turned back around to the woman at the front desk.

"As a matter of fact, we do offer private sessions. Are you interested in cardio, strength training, or a combination?"

"Definitely a combination..."

Zed gently pushed Addison aside and stepped up to the counter, "That won't be necessary..." he turned to look at Addison. "I'll help you out. I'm pretty sure I remember how you like it."

"You sure you're up for it? I like to be worked...hard..." she bit her lip and looked up to him through her lashes.

He swallowed loudly. "Yeah… I'm definitely up for it. Question is… are you?"

She gave him a questioning look before smiling ever so slightly and following him into the weight room.

"Sooo…," he said as busied himself adjusting the weights on the barbell for her. "What's got you so tense?"

"Gee, Zed… I wonder..." she smiled innocently up at him as she laid down on the bench. "Maybe it's because the last few times I've tried to get laid, someone has started throwing punches..."

"...Totally unrelated..."

"Whatever you say..." she said with a heavy eye roll, lifting the heavy bar up and pressing. "So… if it's 'totally unrelated' as you claim...why have you been so moody lately."

"Moody?"

"Yeah… the fistfights… the Lacey fights…" she placed the bar back into place and sat up. "The lack of groupies being banged on the bus..."

"Next question..." he laughed.

She rolled her eyes and smiled, walking over to the exercise ball and sitting on it. "Fine...What started the fight this morning?"

"You really want to know?" he asked as he knelt in front of her and held her feet in place.

She leaned back. "I wouldn't have asked if I didn't," she said as she came back up.

He was silent for a moment as he watched her complete a few crunches. "You remember that time you showed up at the record store in the rain?"

She stilled. "Yes… but what does that have to do with Lacey?" She let out a gasp and sat up as a thought crossed her mind. "Did she show up in your bunk wearing lingerie and a raincoat?!"

"Oh God no!" he laughed.

"Okay, then what?"

He scratched the back of his head and glanced away. "I may have been dreaming about it when she climbed in my bunk. I guess she thought my um… arousal was related to her..." he met her eyes. "Which I can guarantee you, it was not. It was completely because of red silk, and gray raincoats, and sweatshirts, and..." he offered her a small smile. "… And I need to stop talking."

She smiled up at him. "You had a dream about me?"

He shrugged. "I'd be lying if I said it was the first time..."

It was silent between them for a moment before she whispered, "I may have had a dream about you last night too..."

"Is that so?"

She nodded her head and bit her bottom lip.

"That lip, I swear…" he mumbled under his breath as his hand slowly started to move up her leg. "And what was your dream about?"

"Remember that first Monday morning after we started dating?"

He let out a soft laugh and nodded as he sat up on his knees, guiding her back and helping her stretch. "Seems strangely appropriate given our current location," he teased.

His smooth voice washed over her, making her eyes flutter. "Zed..." she whispered breathlessly.

"You didn't even wait for me!" Tracey called out as he burst through the doors, making them both sit up in a panic.

* * *

"I was reading Slim Aarons and I got to thinking that I thought

Maybe I'd get less stressed if I was tested less like

All of these debutantes

Smiling for miles in pink dresses and high heels on white yachts

But I'm not, baby, I'm not

No, I'm not, that, I'm not

I've been tearing around in my fucking nightgown

24/7 Sylvia Plath

Writing in blood on the walls

'Cause the ink in my pen don't work in my notepad

Don't ask if I'm happy, you know that I'm not

But at best I can say I'm not sad

'Cause hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have

Hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have..."

Her fingers moved across the cool ivory of the in house piano creating a haunting melody. Her mind was all over the place.

"There's a new revolution, a loud evolution that I saw

Born of confusion and quiet collusion of which mostly I've known

A modern-day woman with a weak constitution, 'cause I've got

Monsters still under my bed that I could never fight off..."

She sighed ran her hands through her hair.

"I've been tearing around in my fucking nightgown

Like a goddamn near sociopath

Writing in blood on your walls

'Cause the ink in my pen don't look good in my pad

They write that I'm happy, they know that I'm not

But at best, you can see I'm not sad

But hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have

Hope is a dangerous thing for a woman with my past…

Hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have

But I have it

Yeah, I have it..."

"That's really beautiful," Zed said from the doorway, finally making his presence known.

Addison jumped and quickly closed the piano. "Fuck, you scared me," she said holding a hand over her now racing heart.

"Sorry, Baby."

She let out a deep breath and tried to hide her smile. "Please don't call me that."

"I'm sorry. Old habits die hard." he pushed off from the door frame and slowly walked over to the piano, sitting beside her on the bench. "So...which undeserving pop princess is that one for?"

Addison rolled her eyes. "I still can't believe I told you about that… fucking tequila."

"Avoiding the question much?"

She sighed and threw her head back. "If you must know, this one's for me."

"You mean Lacey is actually going to let you write a song? Color me surprised."

"Ha! Not a chance...when I said, me, I meant for my own personal enjoyment."

"Can you answer something for me? Truthfully? No Bullshit?"

"Will you leave if I do?" she teased.

"I make no promises."

Addison silently laughed. "Then neither do I."

"Fair enough...Why aren't you working on your solo career or writing and singing lead for a better band than the Acey's? You're too talented to just be playing bass and hiding in the shadows. You had a fucking record deal, Adds. What happened?"

"Yeah… Not going there," she snapped

Zed held his hands up in surrender.

"Lucky for me Lacey is quite happy taking lead...crappy songwriting and all."

"Well maybe if she wasn't such a narcissistic bitch, she'd actually do whatever it takes to get ahead in this industry."

"You're the one that dated her."

Zed rolled his eyes and dramatically dropped his head onto the piano. "For the last time...We. Did. Not. Date." he said as he looked up at her.

"Fine. Slept with...Better?"

"No… drunkenly fucked and couldn't escape would be more accurate. That girl is a stage 5 clinger."

"Can you answer something for me? Truthfully? No Bullshit?"

He sat up and shook his head. "Always."

"What really happened with the song the Acey's say you stole?"

"I didn't steal that fucking song. I swear. She stole it from me," he practically growled before sighing again. "My only guess is that she copied it out of my notebook while I was passed out."

"Zed..."

"Have you heard the song?"

"No. You know Bucky won't let either band touch it."

"But have you heard it?"

"No."

Zed opened the piano. "It was a work in progress, so it's a bit shitty. But please bear with me…"

She nodded her head and scooched further over on the piano bench so he could sit in the middle. He looked over to her and took a deep breath as his finger started to move across the keys.

"I want a girl with lips like morphine,

knock me out every time they touch me.

I wanna feel a kiss just crush me,

And break me down

Knock me out

Knock me out

Cause I've waited for all my life,

To be here with you tonight.

He threw her a wink and watched as recognition crossed her face and she let out a small gasp.

"I want a girl with lips like morphine,

Blow a kiss that leaves me gasping.

And I wanna feel that lightning strike me,

And burn me down.

Knock me out

Knock me out

Cause I've waited for all my life,

To be here with you tonight.

Just put me on my back,

Knock me out again."

His hands stilled on the keys as he looked over to her.

Addison had tears forming in her eyes. "Z...she didn't write that song."

He shook his head. "No, she didn't. I mean, she switched 'girl' to 'boy' but yeah… Not unless by some weird set of circumstances she was at the exact same house party in Beverly Hills, having the exact same experience with the hottest girl ever."

Addison let out a small laugh as she wiped her eyes. "I can't believe you wrote a song about that."

"Well, it wouldn't exactly be obvious to anyone else," he teased, nudging her with his elbow. "And getting a fuck hot girlfriend out of the whole ordeal...totally worth taking a punch from her ex-boyfriend."

Addison rolled her eyes. "You know we didn't start dating for like a month and a half after that. If I recall, someone already had a girlfriend."

Zed cracked a small smile. "And you know that you owned me from the moment your lips touched mine..."

"Whatever you say, Jacobs."

"Don't call me that."

"Sorry, old habits die hard," she smirked. "So… When did you write it?"

"No bullshit?"

Addison nodded her head.

"It's what I was working on earlier that night before Lacey showed up… It's why I wasn't out with everyone else."

Her jaw dropped open in disbelief. "You wrote about our first kiss that recently?"

Zed ran a nervous hand through his hair. "Addie...have you listened to our set?"

"No bullshit?"

It was Zed's turn to nod his head.

"No. I tried that first night, but...seeing you on stage with a guitar...it brought back too many memories."

He brushed a stray piece of her snow-white hair from her face, running his thumb across her cheek. "Maybe you should give it a listen. All our songs are about one of two things. Being in the military, or...well I'll let you decide what the other is."

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" Lacey's shrill voice pierced through the room. They both jumped apart and turned to see Lacey standing in the doorway holding a leather-bound notebook with Tracey and Stacey standing behind her.

"Why do you have my notebook?" Addison asked standing up from the bench as the three of them walked further into the room.

"Oh, so this IS your notebook..." Lacey flipped it open and shoved it in Addison's face. "Why the hell is Zed's handwriting in here then?"

"Why do you even know what his handwriting looks like?"

Lacey popped her hip to the side and rolled her eyes. "Don't even try to change the subject!"

Zed walked up behind Addison and took the notebook from Lacey.

"Oh, I suppose you're going to accuse us of stealing another song. So sad…. Everyone knows you stole it from me," she sneered.

"For the last time, you psycho bitch, I did not steal that fucking song," he growled low and menacingly.

Addison quickly stood up and positioned herself in between them, holding her hands out. "Remember what Bucky said. If you two start fighting again..."

"Ad..." he caught himself and let out a frustrated sigh through his clenched teeth. "Princess, move."

"Yeah, Casey, I'd love to see him toss his career away. He's good at throwing away good things he doesn't deserve."

"That might be truer than you know, but I promise...you were never on that list." He looked over the pages in question, smiling at the memory. "And my handwriting is in her notebook because she was too drunk to write it herself and her bandmates left her alone with a group of complete strangers. I was the one who made sure she got home safe." He pushed past Addison and glared at Lacey as he walked out of the room, tossing the notebook behind him.

"God is he hot," Lacey said under her breath as she watched him leave.

Addison was furious. "What the hell is wrong with you? Everyone is busting their asses to make this tour work and you're going to fucking ruin it for everyone if you keep this shit up!"

"What do you care. You're riding my coattails anyway. You're only an Acey because I said so. I got rid of our last bass player, and I swear if you ever speak to me like that again, I will get rid of you too. I don't care if you're screwing our manager or not!"

"Excuse me? Ew..."

"Oh, and another thing...Don't think I haven't noticed all the longing glances towards Zed. Friends my ass. May I remind you that you signed an agreement when you joined this band..."

Addison closed her eyes and bit the inside of her cheek. Lacey was lying to everyone about the song. She was lying about Zed coming onto her. Who knew what else she was lying about. All it would take was one quick flash of his name on her lip to shut her up. Everything in her screamed to tell her everything and take her down a notch.

"Knock knock..." They all turned around to see Bucky standing in the doorway.

She let out a sigh and un-clenched her fists. Bucky… She couldn't mess this up for him. He'd been there for her through everything. He needed her to make this work.

"WHAT?" Lacey snapped

He looked over to Addison, silently questioning if everything was alright.

She nodded ever so slightly.

"Soundcheck in thirty..." with a forced smile he turned and walked back out.

"Hoooooly shit...Casey! These are damn good! You've been holding out on us girly! Look at all these, Stacey!" Tracey said as he flipped through the discarded journal and handed it over to her.

Addison let out a sigh. "I've been writing every single day since we started like we're supposed to be doing. Someone made it very clear that my ideas were not needed."

"Seriously, Lace? We've been in a slump since we got on the road! Bucky's been riding our asses about new songs and you didn't jump on this? What is wrong with you woman?"

"Don't bitch at me, Trace. If I thought for a second one of those songs could hold up to what our fans have come to expect from us..."

"Lacey...these are better than what we have…" Stacey said looking up from the notebook. "Band vote...all in favor of working on some of Casey's songs raise your hand..." Stacey, and Tracey both raised their hands. "All opposed?" Lacey raised hers. "Sorry Lace...majority wins."

"Like hell it does! This is my fucking band!"

"No, Lacey… it's OUR band..." Tracey countered as he and Stacey went to stand with Addison.

Lacey glared at them all. "This isn't over..." she growled as she spun around and stormed out the door.

"Well..." Tracey smiled as he looked at Addison and Stacey. "Where should we start?"

"What?" Addison questioned.

"The songs you wrote… When can we start working on them?"

She took a step back. "Are you sure? You heard Lacey..."

He shook his head. "Like she's going to quit. She said so herself… it's her band. She'll get over it…."

They all turned back towards the door when they heard someone clear their throat.

"Sorry to interrupt..." Zed said as he walked over to the piano. "I forgot something." He picked up his cigarettes from the bench. "See you guys after soundcheck." He locked eyes with Addison and gave her her favorite smile before walking back out the door.

Without tearing her eyes away from the doorway, she held out her hand, "Tracey… notebook…" her face broke out in a smile. "I've got the perfect song to start with..."

* * *

Twenty minutes later the three of them were on stage working through the new song.

"Sounds damn good..." Bucky said from the front of the stage. "Are you guys playing it tonight?"

They all looked at each other before Tracey shrugged. "Lacey..."

"Isn't singing on this one, so I repeat… Are you guys playing it tonight?"

"Do you think we should?" Stacey asked from behind her kit.

Bucky nodded, "I do..." He looked over at Addison, "Good to finally hear one of your songs."

Her jaw dropped open. "How did you..."

He arched a brow and gave her a smirk, making her roll her eyes.

"I'm going to go find Lacey. Soundcheck in five..." he said as he turned and walked towards the exit.

Addison looked over to Tracey and Stacey. "I'll be right back..." she took off her bass and jumped off the stage, jogging towards the exit. "Bucky!" she called after him once she was outside.

He looked back as she made her way over to him. "What's up?"

She looked around to make sure they were alone before pulling him into a hug.

He stiffened as he checked around them before relaxing and hugging her back. "What's this for?"

"Can't a girl hug her brother?"

He let out a soft laugh and kissed the top of her head. "Of course she can… as long as she tells her brother what's really going on."

She stood on her tiptoes. "Keep a close eye on Lacey," she whispered, before placing a kiss on his cheek and walking back inside.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I know, I haven't updated in WEEKS. I promise I will try to update more regularly. ****Let me know what you think of this chapter, the story on the whole, the weather… whatevs! I love hearing from you guys! **

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**Hope Is A Dangerous Thing- Lana Del Ray**

**Lips Like Morphine- Kill Hannah **


	19. Nicotine

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

**Chapter 19**

**NICOTINE**

"This last song tonight is a new one, written by our very own smoke-show bassist, Casey!" Tracey rasped into the mic as he wiped his sweaty hair off his forehead and started to play a few tinkling notes on the keyboard.

Zed's head whipped towards the stage at the sound of her name.

"Cross my heart and hope to die

Burn my lungs and curse my eyes

I've lost control and I don't want it back

I'm going numb, I've been hijacked

It's a fucking drag

I taste you on my lips and I can't get rid of you

So I say damn your kiss and the awful things you do

You're worse than nicotine..."

Zed watched from the side of the stage. His eyes never leaving Addison. For the first time since she joined the tour, she was actually starting to get into the music. Of course, that could be because this was the first decent thing the Acey's had ever played.

"I'm losing to you, baby, I'm no match

I'm going numb, I've been hijacked

It's a fucking drag

I taste you on my lips and I can't get rid of you

So I say damn your kiss and the awful things you do

You're worse than nicotine

You're worse than nicotine..."

As they got to the bridge, Addison glanced to the side of the stage, knowing his eyes would be on her.

"Just one more hit and then we're through

'Cause you could never love me back

Cut every tie I have to you

'Cause your love's a fucking drag

But I need it so bad

Your love's a fucking drag

But I need it so bad..."

She ran her tongue along her bottom lip and threw him a wink.

"You're worse than nicotine

You're worse than nicotine"

Cheers and screams filled the air as The Acey's took a bow. The moment that they exited the stage, Tracey nearly tackled her. "THAT SONG WAS EVERYTHING! DID YOU SEE HOW CRAZY THE CROWD WENT?!"

Lacey sneered and pushed past them towards the green room.

"I think she's pissed..." Stacey muttered as she threw her arms around Tracey and Addison. "But I don't really care. That was epic!"

Addison couldn't help the smile that was spreading across her face.

"Band meeting, now!" Bucky shouted, getting their attention as he pointed towards the green room.

They gave each other a wary glance before starting after him.

As they walked down the hall backstage, Zed grabbed Addison's arm, holding her back.

She turned back to look at him. "What the..."

"Shhh…." he motioned for her to follow him, leading her onto the fire escape.

"Bucky's going to have my ass for not being in th…." she started as they stepped out into the cold night air, only to be cut off by his lips crashing into hers. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her into him. His frantic kisses making her dizzy.

She gasped and pushed him away. Her lungs heaving for oxygen. Her brain a fucking mess of emotions.

After a thirty-second standoff, she crossed her arms over her boobs. "Just friends… remember..."

He smiled and pulled her back into him, biting her bottom lip and pulling it, making her moan. "Don't forget to check out our set."

She rolled her eyes and gently pushed him away, hiding her smile with a smirk. "I'll see if I can make it."

"Meet me back out here, after..." he threw her a wink and walked back inside.

"Cocky bastard..." she mumbled to herself as she smiled and leaned her head against the wall. She took a deep breath. "Just friends..." She repeated it to herself a few more times before heading back in to catch up with the rest of The Acey's.

"Where the hell were you?" Bucky snapped the second she walked through the door of the green room.

She rolled her eyes and grabbed the bottle of tequila from the table and sat down next to Tracey. "Needed some fresh air… what's got your panties in a twist?"

"I was just telling the rest of your band-mates that I want you writing more, so thanks for finally showing up."

"Fucking bullshit..." Lacey mumbled.

"You don't like it, then write something! That was the most life I've seen in one of your shows in a long fucking time!" Bucky snapped back.

Lacey stood up and glared. "I'm out… maybe I'll be back by the morning," she sneered as she pushed past him and stormed out the door.

"And that… right there… is what has my 'panties in a twist'..." he said looking over to Addison.

"Oh, relax, B..." Tracey said as he stood up. "She'll be back. She's just being her typical dramatic self."

"I hope you're right."

"I am… Now, I'm going to go hit the bar and shmooze with some fans since we're not having a meet and greet tonight. Ladies, you with me?"

Stacey shook her head. "Not tonight. I'm beat… I'm going to go back to the bus and pass the fuck out."

Bucky rolled his eyes. "Do you need to go to the doctor or something? You've been exhausted for like a month."

She shrugged her shoulders and stood up. "It's just road exhaustion. I'll be fine… Night guys."

Tracey looked over to Addison hopefully.

"I'll meet you down there, Trace."

He smiled wide and clapped. "Yay! Thanks, Casey!" he said excitedly as he walked out the door.

Bucky waited until he heard Tracey's footsteps going down the stairs before he turned back towards Addison. "Good job tonight, Sis."

"Thank you Brother-dear."

"I was serious though, I want you writing more. You're good for this band."

"I don't think Lacey agrees with you," she said as she stood up.

"Don't worry about Lacey."

"I keep hearing that… But I don't trust her."

Bucky rolled his eyes. "Why do the women in my life keep doing this..."

"Come again?"

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "E doesn't trust her either."

"Well, maybe you should listen to your girlfriend."

"Adds," he whined. "Help me out here…"

"Isn't that why I'm here in the first place?"

He nodded his head. "Yeah… But you're supposed to be helping me keep this band together. Why don't you trust her?"

"She's lying."

"About..."

"She didn't write the song she claims that Zombies stole," she replied as she raised the bottle of tequila to her lips and took a large swig.

"How do you know?"

"I just know, okay!" she snapped. "She's lying about the song, she's been trying to dig up info on me… I just..." she closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I just don't trust her, and neither should you."

"Noted. But unless I have more info, I can't do anything about it."

"I'm not asking you to implode the band, B."

"But that's what would happen. Her ego is already taking a hit, but it's needed for the sake of the band… If I push her too far..." he let out a frustrated sigh.

"Hey..." she hugged him and rested her head on his shoulder. "You're a great manager. Don't be so rough on yourself… You should know by now that musicians are fucking crazy."

He smiled and leaned his head against hers. "Yeah… learned that lesson the hard way."

"Yet you still love me."

"Always will, Addie-loo."

"Ugh..." she pushed him away laughing. "Bonding moment, ruined." She took another sip of tequila and capped the bottle. "So… any big plans tonight since we're here again tomorrow?"

He smiled and nodded his head. "Already have reservations at the hotel down the street… let's hope E and I can both get away without anyone noticing.

"I'll see what I can do," she said as she threw him a wink. "Now come on, your girl is already on stage."

* * *

"So, what did I miss?" Addison asked as she sat down at the bar next to Tracey.

He smirked and downed his cosmo. "Not much. The crowd is WAY more into Zombies than us," he turned to glance at the stage. "Can't really blame them… look how in sync they are."

Addison followed his gaze, her eyes automatically locking on Zed. She could still feel the sting of his teeth on her bottom lip. She let out a shaky breath and closed her eyes, willing herself to focus on Tracey instead. "We'll get there."

He met her eyes and smiled. "Damn right we will! Especially now that we've got the all-clear to work on your songs!" He flagged down the bartender. "I need another cosmo, and this gorgeous thing here needs a tequila and perrier and your number..."

The bartender smiled as Addison playfully pushed Tracey off his barstool.

"I'm sorry about my very forward, band-mate," she laughed.

"Nothing to apologize for," he replied with a wink. "You were pretty hot up on that stage tonight."

"Thanks..."

"How's it going tonight?" Zed growled into the mic, catching her attention. She stole a glance towards the stage just as a lacey black bra landed at his feet. She watched a smile spread across his face, clearly eating up the attention. "Bastard..." she mumbled to herself as she turned back towards the bartender and smiled as they stuck up a conversation, doing her best to ignore Zed and the gravelly sound of his voice as he sang.

"You're mom don't know that you were missing

She'd be pissed if she could see the parts of you

That I've been kissing..."

Addison sat up a little taller. "Hold that thought..." she apologized to the bartender and turned herself towards the stage.

"So come on baby, get in

Get in, just get in

Check out the trouble we're in

You're beside me on the seat

Got your hand between my knees

And you control how fast we go by just how hard you wanna squeeze

It's hard to steer when you're breathing in my ear

But I got both hands on the wheel while you got both hands on my gears

By now, no doubt that we were heading south

I guess nobody ever taught her not to speak with a full mouth

'Cause this was it, like flicking on a switch

It felt so good I almost drove into a ditch

I'm screamin'

No, we're never gonna quit..."

Addison nearly spat her drink out across the bar as the words Zed was singing fully registered.

"Jesus, Case… you okay?"

She coughed and cleared her throat, "I'm fine..." she flashed him a smile and focused back on the stage.

"We were parked out by the tracks

We're sitting in the back

And we just started getting busy

When she whispered what was that..."

"He fucking didn't..." she mumbled silently.

"...The wind, I think 'cause no one else knows where we are

And that was when she started screamin'

That's my dad outside the car..."

She dropped her head down in embarrassment. "He did..." she laughed to herself.

"...Oh please, the keys, they're not in the ignition

Must have wound up on the floor while we were switching our positions

I guess they knew that she was missing

As I tried to tell her dad it was her mouth that I was kissing

Screamin'

No, we're never gonna quit

Ain't nothing wrong with it

Just acting like we're animals

No, no matter where we go

'Cause everybody knows

We're just a couple of animals..."

She bit her lip and laughed a little harder, whether it was from the actual memory of that long-ago night, or the fact that he wrote a song about it, she didn't know.

"So come on baby, get in

We're just a couple of animals

Get in, just get in

Ain't nothing wrong with it

Check out the trouble we're in

We're just a couple of animals

Get in, just get in"

She turned and looked at Tracey, laughing even harder. "How long has that been a song?"

He shrugged and smiled. "For a couple of years at least, why?"

"It's fucking hilarious!"

He let out a chuckle and shook his head, "I guess it is, isn't it."

"We're gonna take it down and throw it back a little..." Zed purred as Eliza started a soft cadence on the drums. "This next song is one of the first songs we ever wrote... I miss you, miss you…" he gently sang.

"Wow, they're really going old school tonight," Tracey said. "They haven't played this one in a while."

Addison slowly looked back towards the stage again.

"Hello there

The angel from my nightmare

The shadow in the background of the morgue

The unsuspecting victim

Of darkness in the valley

We can live like Jack and Sally if we want

Where you can always find me

And we'll have Halloween on Christmas

And in the night we'll wish this never ends

We'll wish this never ends..."

She sat there frozen as his words washed over her.

"I miss you, miss you

I miss you, miss you..."

Their eyes connected across the crowded room as everything else around them seemed to disappear.

"Where are you?

And I'm so sorry

I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight

I need somebody and always

This sick strange darkness

Comes creeping on so haunting every time

And as I stared I counted

The webs from all the spiders

Catching things and eating their insides

Like indecision to call you

And hear your voice of treason

Will you come home and stop the pain tonight

Stop this pain tonight..."

Her breath was coming out in shallow pants.

"Don't waste your time on me

You're already the voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)

Don't waste your time on me

You're already the voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)

Don't waste your time on me

You're already the voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)

Don't waste your time on me

You're already the voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)

I miss you, I miss you..."

Addison had tears in her eyes as the crowd cheered around her.

Zed held her gaze as he leaned into the microphone. "Forever." He threw her a wink and launched into the next song.

She couldn't move.

"Casey… you okay?" Tracey asked, obviously concerned.

She wiped at her eyes. "Yeah… I'm fine, Tracey," she smiled. "I'm sorry about that, I need to…" she gestured toward the exits. "...cigarette." She stood up abruptly and walked outside.

The cold night air hit her hard as she leaned against the side of the building. Her head swam with endless questions.

"Hey..."

She looked over to see Tracey walking over to her.

"For like the hundredth time, are you okay?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah… just… needed some fresh air."

"I thought you needed a cigarette?" he said as he motioned to the lack of cigarette in her hand.

Addison let out a soft laugh. "Some things not even nicotine can fix..."

"What's going on Casey."

"What do you mean?"

He propped himself against the wall next to her. "I mean, you were fine one second and then the next you were… I don't know… It was like you saw a ghost or something."

"It's nothing really," she smiled.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm fine… Let's just go back in. It's fucking freezing out here."

* * *

When the set finally ended Addison made a bee-line back towards the fire escape they had been on earlier. Song after song had been about her or their relationship. She needed answers, and she was going to get them… Of course that went straight out the window the second he walked outside.

Without a second thought, she grabbed him and slammed him against the door as it closed, crashing her lips against his.

He pushed off the door, pinning her to the bricks with his body, a tangle of leather and plaid, as they kissed.

Her breath rushed as his tongue swept over hers, an agonizing reminder of just how much her body missed him. She twisted her thighs together.

"I thought you said we couldn't do this… We're just friends..."

"Shut up and kiss me Zed…"

Sweat from the stage evaporated off their goosebumped skin in the chilly night air. His chest crushed against hers, his hard cock arched into the cradle of her hip.

She tried to keep up with his mouth, but the feel of him pressed against her knocked her motor function into reboot mode. His fingers lifting her skirt and softly rubbing her clit through her soaking wet underwear as he kissed her into the wall.

"Yo, Zed!" They heard Eliza call out from inside.

"Should you..." he cut her off with another kiss.

"Ignore her..."

"Zed!" They heard, getting closer.

"I think he's on the fire escape," Bonzo called out.

He groaned and pulled away. "We're not done here, understood."

She bit her lip and smiled as she adjusted her skirt, just as Eliza opened the door.

"There you are… Oh, hey Princess," she said as she looked between the two of them. "Um… either of you up for a little baking? One of the security guards hooked me up big time!"

"Like you even need to ask, E," Zed laughed.

"I'm in!" Addison said excitedly.

"Come on then!" Eliza said pulling them along.

.

* * *

"You look like a bat," Eliza laughed as Addison hung upside down from the crawl space above the driver's cabin.

"I am the night...fear me!" she giggled, exhaling and handing the joint back to Eliza.

"God, you are so weird...in the very best way."

Addison flipped down, landing on her feet.

Tracey stood up and applauded. "Perfect score! Were you a gymnast too?"

"Nope, I was a cheerleader," she mock whispered.

"No way!"

"Way..." Bonzo said from his spot on the floor. "Bree showed me photographic proof."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Of course she did."

"You two were adorable in those uniforms… Is it true you used to not wear anything under though?

Zed coughed on the smoke he was holding in.

"Do we really need to discuss that?" Bucky asked as he spun around in one of the captain's chairs. "No one wants to hear about your undergarments… or in this case, lack thereof."

"Speak for yourself!" Tracey giggled, throwing a pillow at him.

Addison shook her head and smiled. "Oh, lighten up, Bucky!" She looked back over to Bonzo, "And if you must know, I always had on AT LEAST underwear… unless my boyfriend got carried away and ripped them."

Bucky faced palmed and groaned as Zed coughed again on another puff.

"Dude… you okay?" Eliza asked him.

He coughed a few more times and nodded vigorously. "Fine… perfectly fine..."

"If you say so..." she stood up and grabbed the joint from him. "No more for you for a few minutes."

Tracey stood up and walked over to the cabinet stereo. "We need music in here." He fiddled with the controls for a moment before the sounds of Nine Inch Nails started to play from the speakers. "Ugh… I love this song! I mean really, name a better Nine Inch Nails song than Head Like a Hole… I'll wait."

"Uh, no… sorry, Tracey… But everyone knows that the best Nine Inch Nails song is Closer," Zed said from the bench seat.

"I'm with Zed..." Addison added. "I mean, that man single-handedly created sex when he released that song!" She bit her lip and closed her eyes, "Mmm… Trent Reznor wearing a leather blindfold, tied up, suspended… And oh my god, the way he licks that microphone..." she shivered and smiled. "I swear that video is the sexiest damn thing I've ever seen."

"That totally explains your taste in porn," Bonzo laughed.

"Yeah… On that note, I'm heading out," Bucky said as he handed the joint back to Eliza and stood up stretching. "I don't need to hear about anyone's porn preference."

"Aww, you're no fun, B," she teased. "I was just about to explain the subtle differences between Shibari and Western rope bondage!"

"I swear you are into some weird shit..." he muttered, turning a lovely shade of red as he walked towards the exit. "I definitely need a night away from this bus..."

"Don't kink shame me!"

Eliza, Bonzo, and Tracey were practically on the floor laughing as Zed stared at her with wide eyes, casually grabbing one of the throw pillows and placing it over his lap.

"Oh, my God, Princess… that was priceless," Eliza managed to get out in between laughs. "I've never seen anyone turn that shade before… how did you come up with that?"

She smiled and sat down on the bench next to Zed. "I totally would have walked him through the basics. Maybe if someone tied him up, he wouldn't be so uptight."

Eliza sat up, suddenly very serious as she passed her the joint. "Wait...you really are into that stuff?"

Addison took a puff and held it as she nodded her head. She passed it to Zed and exhaled. "Yeah, I mean, who isn't into a little light bondage every now and then?"

Zed coughed again as he tried not to laugh, knowing damn well she liked way more than "light".

Addison shook her head and subtly elbowed him as hard as she could.

"Okay, I'm signing up for lessons!" Eliza called out as she started to look around the room.

"I'd sign up to watch!" Bonzo chimed in.

"You and me both!" Tracey laughed.

"OOH! I've got it!" Eliza jumped up and ran out of the room.

"How you doing over there, Z… you look a little… uncomfortable?" Bonzo teased.

Before he could respond, Eliza came running back into the room. "Here!" she said throwing Addison the tie from a bathrobe. "What can you do with that?!"

Addison caught the tie and stared at Eliza. "You really want to know?" Eliza nodded excitedly, making Addison giggle. "All right..." she turned to Zed. "Wrists, please."

His head snapped over to her. "What?"

"I said...wrists… now."

He swallowed loudly and held his wrists out. "Yes, ma'am," he whispered, meeting her eyes and slightly arching his brow.

A wicked smile played on her lips. She always did like it when he was submissive. "So..." she began as she ran the tie over her hand. "Obviously, I can't do a full suspension, or really even a TK without a lot more rope, but..."

"What's a TK?" Tracey asked.

"Takate-kote, it basically means that your hands are tied behind your back," Zed replied, still not dropping his gaze.

Addison smiled and nodded.

"How do you know?" Eliza asked.

"Like Princess here said… who doesn't like a little light bondage every now and then..."

Addison almost blushed from the heated look he was giving her. Why did she decide to demonstrate on the only man she ever trusted enough to play with. She closed her eyes for a moment before continuing. "Rope is naturally intimate and sensual. But, it still has some dangers. Most of those come from being suspended, but even something as simple as a basic wrist tie is considered edgeplay."

"Edgeplay?"

Addison nodded again. "It has some risks. Not as extreme as playing with fire or knives, but it's there," she practically whispered as her thumb softly traced the scar on Zed's hand as she wrapped the silk around his wrists.

"When did you start with all this?" Tracey asked as he moved closer to get a better view.

"The first time was my Junior year of high school… my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and I made an off-hand remark about how hot the actress looked tied up. One thing led to another and we started experimenting. Before long we were both pretty skilled."

"Well that sounds hot," Tracey giggled. "Is this the same boyfriend who ripped your panties?"

"The very same..." she bit her lip, still holding Zed's gaze.

"Do you do this often?" Eliza asked.

Addison shook her head. "Other than the occasional self-tie, no."

"Why not?" Zed asked softly.

"Rope makes you feel a deep connection to the other person. It's all about intimacy and closeness. About giving total control and about bringing them completely and totally within your control… There's an inherent trust needed... And I've never trusted anyone else." she pulled the box knot tight and smiled. "How does that feel?"

Zed's breath was coming out in small pants. Not trusting his voice he just flashed her a smile and ran his tongue along the inside of his lip.

She let out a shaky breath before turning to Eliza. "Easy peasy box knot tie. Guaranteed to add some spice into even the most vanilla of relationships."

Eliza stood up and walked closer, examining the intricate wrapping and knot. "That's… yeah, I've got to try that out sometime."

Addison laughed and pulled a pack of gum out of her pocket. She popped a piece into her mouth and then opened another, popping it into Zed's mouth.

"You chew Juicy Fruit?" Eliza asked with an odd look.

"Mmhmm… especially after I smoke. You want one?"

Eliza shook her head. "No… The only person I know who does that is Z… how did you know he chews it?"

"Oh, I, um..."

Zed let out a laugh. "See, E! I told you! It's a well-known fact that Juicy Fruit covers the smell of weed better than any other flavor. Princess and I were talking about it at the gym just this morning."

Eliza looked between the two of them several times before finally shrugging. "Whatevs… I'm high as a kite and after that little intro into the world of bondage I need to see some action, sooooo I'm heading out…. Don't wait up for me." She said with a wink.

"And I need a drink..." Tracey said as he stood up and walked to the back of the bus.

The three of them waited until they were alone before letting out a collective sigh.

"Well… That was close," Zed laughed.

Addison looked over to him and smiled. "Oops."

"You wanna give me a hand out of this?" He asked holding up his bound wrists.

She smiled and ran a hand down the side of his face. "Nope..." She stood up and walked to the back to join Tracey.

Zed smirked and shook his head before looking over to Bonzo. "Little help?"

Bonzo held up his phone and snapped a picture. "Sorry… I've got a Face-time date with Bree… she's gonna love this…" he laughed as he stood up and walked off.

Zed rolled his eyes and smiled as he reached for the remote.

By the time Addison and Tracey walked back into the room, he had the stereo turned off and was scrolling through the horror section on Netflix.

"You look comfy..." Tracey teased as they sat down on the bench next to him.

He shrugged and stole a quick glance towards Addison as he continued to scroll.

"Ugh… I swear Netflix has the worst movie selections," she said with an exasperated sigh. "No wonder everyone just has sex."

Zed dropped the remote.

"DIBS!" Tracey called out, grabbing it from the floor before anyone else could get to it.

"Damnit..." Zed cursed.

Addison bit her lip to keep from laughing. "Oh, come here..." she said softly as she took his wrists and started to untie him.

"I was kind of enjoying that..."

She arched a brow. "Kind of?"

He smiled and shrugged.

"OH. MYGOD! This is my favorite movie ever!"

Addison looked up and cringed. "Anything but that garbage… Please."

"Excuse me?" Tracey turned to her with a look of horror. "Great Expectations is a national treasure! And don't even get me started on Missy Donnelly! The looks she serves..." he sighed wistfully. "She is a Goddess! I swear I will watch any fucking movie she is in." He took a closer look at Addison and gasped. "Has anyone ever told you that you look just like her? Especially in her early movies?"

Addison's eyes grew large. "Um..." She desperately tried to remain calm while she internally panicked.

"I don't see it."

They both looked over to Zed.

"What? Are you crazy?" Tracey said hopping up from next to her. "I can't believe I didn't see it sooner! Look at that jawline! And the eyes! And the..."

Zed shrugged. "Still not seeing it. But… whatevs… I'm with Princess on the movie thing, it doesn't have to be a scary movie, but I am not watching Great Expectations. I've seen rehearsals for high school productions that were better than that film."

Addison couldn't help the small smile that crossed her face. Of course, he would come to her rescue and throw in a bit of nostalgia.

Tracey let out an exasperated sigh and pulled out his phone. "Seriously... I can't believe you don't see…." he suddenly stopped and looked up at Addison, his eyes growing wide. He looked between his phone and her several times. "You. Me. Kitchen, NOW!" he said as he grabbed her arm and pulled her to the back of the bus.

"What is..." she started just as Tracey turned his phone around, showing her a paparazzi picture of her and her mother together. "Oh..."

"Oh? OH?! Is that all you're going to say?! You're Missy Donnelly's daughter?!"

"Shhhh…." she urged him. "And… no? I'm Casey Jacobs."

"Yeah, I don't think so. This says Addison Donnelly. And don't try to deny it. You might have white hair, but this is definitely you in this picture! I'd recognize that bored expression anywhere!"

"Tracey, look… You can't say anything."

"Why the hell not?! This is HUGE! If I were Missy Donnelly's kid I'd be telling the whole world! I'd be vacationing on some fancy yacht somewhere! I definitely wouldn't be crammed on a crowded tour bus living gig to gig! Why the hell are you even here?!"

"Because Bucky is a very dear friend of mine and he needed me to help him out when Lacey tossed your last bassist to the curb..."

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "And Lacey would flip her shit if she found out you weren't a natural Acey..." he shook his head and smiled up at her. "You really are a doll… Giving up all that for us… Does anyone else know?"

"Other than Bucky? No..." she whispered, hoping he didn't see through her lie.

He pulled her into a hug. "When we're off this bus, I'm going to need a complete play by play of what it's like being the only child of THE Missy Donnelly!"

She cringed and pulled back to look at him. "Trust me, you don't want me to tell you… My mother and I haven't exactly been on speaking terms for years."

"Are you about to ruin my idle worship?"

"I'm afraid so… That woman is pure evil."

He sighed and hugged her again. "Fine...but at least now I know where you get your love of high-end fashion from!"

She laughed and hugged him back. "Cursed with good looks and expensive taste."

"Such the burden," he teased as he kissed her cheek. "All right, dollface… I'm going to go to bed. I need time to process this colossal revelation and if I go back out there it would only be a matter of seconds until I blabbed to Zedikins. I promise by tomorrow morning I will have this secret locked up tighter than Fort Knox."

"Thank you, Tracey."

The second he walked out of the room, Addison pulled out her phone and sent a screenshot.

_Bartholomew_

_A- 1:47 am Aren't I paying your cousin to keep shit like this OFF the internet? _

She shoved her phone back into her pocket and walked to the front of the bus, plopping down with an exasperated sigh next to Zed on the plush bench seat.

"So..." he whispered. "I'm guessing the secret is out?"

She nodded her head. "At least with Tracey."

"Is he going to tell anyone?"

She let out another sigh and shook her head. "No… I trust him. I mean, I've already taken the necessary precautions and that picture won't be out there much longer..."

He looked over and smiled. "Necessary precautions?"

"Have you tried googling me?"

He was silent for a moment before quietly responding, "I may have a time or two… never was able to find anything."

"Exactly…"

He shook his head. "Do I want to know?"

She bit back a laugh. "My brother knows a guy..."

Zed rolled his eyes and silently laughed. "Of course he does. What's good ole' Bartholomew up to these days? Is he a big-time mob boss?"

"Let's just say he decided to take on a more… managerial role."

"Managerial role?"

"It's probably best that I don't tell you too much more," she whispered with a wink.

He swallowed loudly and nodded. "So… still up for a movie?"

"Good subject change," she teased. "And, since everyone else has gone to bed or isn't here, we can watch whatever the hell we want!"

"The Exorcist it is!" he said with a victorious smile. He leaned over and switched off the lights before pressing play on the remote.

As the opening credits started, Addison leaned her head onto his shoulder and looked up at him. "Thank you..."

"For what?"

"Coming to my rescue and lying to Tracey that I don't look like my mother."

He smiled and brushed a piece of hair away from her face. "It wasn't a lie."

She rolled her eyes.

"Adds, I'm serious. I've never thought you looked like her…" His hand caressed her cheek as he looked into her eyes. "You're so much more beautiful…"

A soft blush spread across her cheeks as his hand ran down her cheek.

"It's after midnight… Happy Anniversary."

Her breath caught. "You remembered?"

"When are you going to realize that I remember everything when it comes to you?" he whispered as he leaned in closer.

"Hey, Princess, Bree wants to... talk to you..." Bonzo said as he walked into the room and read the situation. "Am I interrupting something?"

"Yes," Zed said through gritted teeth at the same time Addison let out a breathy "No..."

She looked over to Zed and gave him a tight smile. "Just friends… remember?"

"Yeah," he mumbled, running his hand through his hair in frustration. "Just friends..."

She stood up and took the phone from Bonzo. "Raincheck on the movie..."

* * *

_She stared at the crack in the wall desperately to figure out how long it had been. It was summer when she arrived, but judging from the bitter cold, she'd have to guess it was well into winter now. Days and nights had long since started to blur together. When she was first brought to The Sisters of Quiet Mercy, she had managed to keep a running tally of days. Thirty-two. That's how long it took for her to give up hope that anyone was coming to bring her home. A failed escape attempt later and she was no longer given access to paper and pencils. Another failed attempt landed her in her current state. She pulled against the bed restraints, cringing as they cut further into her wrists._

_The door creaking open brought her out of her thoughts. _

"_And how are we feeling this morning Ms. Donnelly?"_

_Addison ignored the nun, doing her best to turn away from her. _

"_Uh-huh-huh, deary. It's time for your medication… You wouldn't want to risk the baby by skipping your prenatal, would you?"_

_Addison rolled her eyes. Like anyone here was concerned about her baby. _

"_If you take these without a fight, I'll undo the restraints… Maybe even let you out into the activities room. You know how much you love the piano."_

_That caught her attention. She nodded silently and opened her mouth, taking the large pill and swallowing. _

"_That's a good girl." The nun moved to the bottom of the bed and began to undo the leg restraints. _

_Just as she felt her ankle being freed, she felt a sharp jab. She tried to sit up to see what had happened but everything around her was growing dim and eventually faded to black. _

_Warm brown eyes gazed into hers. "It's going to be okay, Baby. Keep fighting … I love you… Forever..." _

_Her eyes popped open. Darkness. It had only been a dream… or she was hallucinating. Nothing would surprise her at this point. She pulled hard at the restraints, feeling the warm sensation of blood running from the cuts that they caused. She choked back a sob. She wasn't going to give them the satisfaction of hearing her crying again. Playing music had always been her coping mechanism, but that was obviously out of the question now. She let out a deep breath and closed her eyes. Her fingers moving across imaginary strings._

"_I look at the… world and… I notice it's turning…_

_While… my guitar… gently weeps..." she whispered in a raspy voice._

"_With… every mistake… we must surely… be learning…_

_Still my guitar… gently weeps..." her throat burned and tears streamed down her face. _

"_ADDISON!" _

_She opened her eyes. Still nothing but the darkness of night. _

"_ADDIE!"_

_It was official. She was definitely hallucinating. She closed her eyes again. At least when her eyes were closed she hallucinated Zed, not the voice of her idiot step-brother. _

_The sound of an alarm blaring made her eyes open again. _

"_ADDIE-LOO!"_

_Maybe she wasn't hallucinating._

"_ADDISON!" _

"_Bucky?" she hoarsed out. She grimaced as she swallowed, willing her voice to work. "Bucky?!" She took a deep breath and tried once more. "BUCKY!"_

"_ADDS!"_

"_I'M IN HERE!"_

_She could hear keys against the door._

"_DALE! I FOUND HER!"_

* * *

She sat up suddenly, covered in a thin layer of sweat and panting, clutching her chest. Another scream pierced through the darkness. It took her a second to realize that it was real and not just a residual from her nightmare. She took a deep breath in through her nose and exhaled before opening her bunk curtain to see what was going on. As she climbed down something grabbed onto her ankle. She bit back a scream of her own and looked down.

"Shhh..." Bonzo whispered, holding a finger against his lips.

Addison climbed into his bunk. "I thought I heard someone scream." Right on cue, it happened again.

Bonzo sighed. "Zed."

Her eyes grew wide. "What happened?!" she asked in a near panic. "Is he okay?"

Bonzo nodded. "It happens every now and then...why do you think almost everyone on this bus owns a pair of noise-canceling headphones."

"Wait, this is normal?"

He nodded again. "PTSD is a hell of a thing. It presents differently in all of us. For Zed… it's night terrors."

"Why the hell aren't you waking him up?"

"It'll pass. God only knows what he's dreaming about. It's not worth the risk of him lashing out unintentionally."

Addison was furious. "So you're just going to let him suffer?!"

"Nothing anyone can do..."

"Like hell, there isn't..." she snapped as she rolled out of his bunk and took off towards Zeds. The sounds of snores emanated from around her as she quietly climbed the ladder leading to his bunk. Slowly she opened the curtain. The sight before her broke her heart.

Zed was tossing and turning, his eyes scrunched tight and a grimace etched onto his face. He was covered in sweat.

"Zed..." she whispered, lightly nudging his shoulder.

His only response was to let out another scream.

She climbed into his bunk and straddled him, closing the curtain behind her. She shook both of his shoulders as hard as she could.

He grabbed her wrists roughly, still asleep.

"Z… please wake up..." she nearly cried.

His eyes popped open. "Baby..."

"I'm right here… shhh… everything is going to be okay…."

He let go of her wrists and in a move so fast she barely felt it happening, had them rolled over, pinning her beneath him.

"If I'm still dreaming, I hope I never wake up..." he whispered as he stared into her eyes.

She reached up and pulled him down to her, crashing her lips against his.

Their kisses were rushed, desperate and needy as their clothes came off. He sat back on his heels as much as the small bunk would allow and stared admiringly at her, calming the chaotic frenzy.

"Is this when you tell me we're just friends?" he whispered.

"Zed… shut up and fuck me."

His chest shook with silent laughter as he grabbed a condom from the shelf and ripped it open, sliding it over his length. "My pleasure, Baby..."

Her breath rushed as he slid into her with one hard thrust. She tried to quiet it, but the feel of him was just too much.

His lips hit her neck, causing chills to climb her spine. His teeth grazed as they started to rock to an old familiar song, their own twisted version of a lullaby. His thrusts were gentle and perfectly timed.

The temptation to scream his name was just too much. Fuck the band. She let out a loud moan.

He stilled. Someone sighed from one of the bunks. His rough hand covered her mouth. She inhaled through her nose and let out her breath slowly. They laid like that, with his dick fully engaged inside her, for several minutes.

The waiting was agony. She wanted more of him. She needed him moving, taking, imbibing.

He uncovered her mouth and resumed his gentle thrusts to the pulse of her throbbing clit. She was spread as wide as the small space would allow. Vulnerable. Naked. She should hate herself for allowing this to happen, but she couldn't.

Her beautiful rock star thrusted to a silent rhythm. Closing her eyes, she concentrated on the subatomic music they made together. The notes seeping into her mind and penetrating down into her soul. This was greater than any high, any drug, any addiction. It was pure and raw. It was them. As much as she didn't want to admit it, he was still her soul mate in every way. No inhibitions. No fear. No boundaries.

And when the sun came up, she was going to have to go back to pretending she didn't give a shit.

She pushed him away and rolled them so she was on her side. She drew up her bent legs to give him wider access, and his thrusts roughened. He yanked her face back toward his and stared into her eyes as he fucked her into oblivion. His lips fell on hers, softer than she expected.

His fingers moved to her clit, making her silently scream for release. She put her hips into it and assumed control of the thrusts, impaling herself over and over. He squeezed her tits so hard, she was sure she'd have bruises in the morning. Still kissing her, he paused a second before letting out a string of curses as he came. The feel of him pulsing deep inside her as he hit her g-spot from behind sent her over the edge. Blinding light blocked her vision as she doused the curtain with her release.

She quietly heaved for breath, still in shock. She'd never squirted before. Silently she hoped he hadn't noticed.

He reached around her and touched the wet fabric drape before bringing his fingers to his mouth and licking them.

She could feel his grin in the dark. His arms enclosed her in a blanket of cum and warmth and satisfaction. And then he kissed her. Not like a guy who was flailing in the wild throes of passion. Not like a guy motivated purely by sex. Not like a guy trying to shut her up and get rid of her, or any of the other ways she'd been kissed over the years. He kissed her like he used to. Like he was in love with her. Slow, careful circles floating on waves of desire. Without thinking, she answered with the same warmth.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE****: Yeah, this was one of those chapters where I had some trouble getting the flow to work for me. I've had most of the next chapter written since I started this story, so this one was really difficult to write for some reason. I apologize if it was kinda (or really) craptastic.**

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**Nicotine- Panic at the Disco**

**Animals- Nickelback **

**Miss You- Blink 182**

**While My Guitar Gently Weeps- The Beatles (Side note: This is also the song that Zed has a tattoo from)**


	20. Blackbird

**Chapter 21**

**BLACKBIRD**

"Well… did you write something new or not?" Lacey sneered as she sat down at the kitchen table with the rest of the band. "We haven't had a new song in like two weeks."

"That's because you won't let me sing another new song..." Tracey mumbled under his breath.

Addison kicked him under the table. "I've got a few already written if you'd like to look through them… maybe pick one that speaks to you?" Addison offered, trying her best to play nice for Bucky's sake.

"I highly doubt it..." She took the notebook from Addison and started to flip through it.

The sounds of a guitar being played from upfront cut through the otherwise quiet bus.

"Have you got colour in your cheeks?..."

"Oh, hell no! We're supposed to be practicing now, not him! Fucking, Zed..." She snapped as she stood up and stormed out the room.

Stacey rolled her eyes. "And they'd been doing so well lately..."

"We should probably..." Tracey motioned towards the front of the bus as Lacey started screaming. "BEFORE this gets any worse..."

They all stood up and ran towards Zed and Lacey ready to step in between them and prevent another fight.

As soon as Zed spotted Addison, he smiled and started singing again, ignoring Lacey as she continued to yell at him.

"I've dreamt about you nearly every night this week

How many secrets can you keep?

Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow

And I play it on repeat

Until I fall asleep

Spilling drinks on my settee..."

"Did you hear me?" Lacey yelled over the amplifier. "This is OUR practice time!"

Zed continued to ignore her and looked back over to Addison.

"Do I wanna know

If this feeling flows both ways?

Sad to see you go

Was sorta hoping that you'd stay

Baby, we both know

That the nights were mainly made

For saying things that you can't say tomorrow day..."

"DAMNIT ZED!" Lacey shrieked.

He flipped her off and turned up his portable amp.

"Crawling back to you

Ever thought of calling when you've had a few?

Cause I always do

Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new

Now I've thought it through

Crawling back to you..."

"YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK YOU… I'M GOING TO FIND BUCKY!" Lacey screamed as she spun around and marched out the door.

"So have you got the guts?

Been wondering if your heart's still open

And if so, I wanna know what time it shuts..."

Lacey opened the door back up. "Are you guys coming or not!"

"Simmer down and pucker up

I'm sorry to interrupt, it's just I'm constantly on the cusp

Of trying to kiss you..."

Tracey and Stacey walked out, but Addison couldn't escape the heated look Zed was giving her as he sang.

"I don't know if you feel the same as I do

We could be together if you wanted to..."

She bit her lip and walked to the door, flipping the lock.

"Do I wanna know

If this feeling flows both ways?

Sad to see you go

Was sorta hoping that you'd stay

Baby, we both know

That the nights were mainly made

For saying things that you can't say tomorrow day..."

"You're trouble… you know that, right?"

He let out a laugh and set his guitar down before stalking over to her, pinning her against the door with his body. "How else was I supposed to get your attention? You've been avoiding me."

"I wasn't avoiding you..."

He arched his brow and smirked.

"Fine… there may have been a little avoidance. But we're supposed to be 'friends'… friends don't have hot crazy sex every other night!"

"Sometimes it's twice a night..."

She smiled and bit her lip.

"Don't bite your lip… If you do that, then I'm going to kiss you. I meant every word of what I just sang. These last few weeks have been..."

She met his eyes and bit her lip.

"I warned you..." he laced his fingers in her hair and pulled her to him, kissing her hard.

"Zed..." she breathed out as he leaned back in.

The door behind them shook.

"Damnit, Zed! OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR!"

He rolled his eyes. "Fucking Lacey..." he whispered, making her laugh. "Meet me in my bunk again tonight?"

She rolled her eyes. "No! Friends, remember?"

"ZED I SWEAR TO GOD OPEN THIS DOOR!"

He smiled and rolled his eyes. "You say the same thing every other day..."

"And I mean it!"

He stole a quick kiss. "Friends or not, I want you hosing down my curtains again… and my face."

She smacked him playfully. "You're such a perv..."

"Seriously, Adds… That shit gets hotter every fucking time."

She giggled and pulled him back to her. "How can you even be thinking of that when Lacey is outside screaming her head off?"

He bit her lower lip and smiled. "What can I say, I've got a one-track mind."

Her eyes grew wide as she pulled him in for a kiss.

"Uhoh… I know that look..."

She nodded excitedly and pushed him away. "I've got to go!"

"Can't wait to hear it..." He smacked her ass as she ran past him. He wasn't sure what they were doing, but for the first time in a long time, he was happy.

"OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR NECRODOPOLOUS!"

"Fucking, Lacey..." He shook his head and unlocked the door.

* * *

"The sex and lies, remember

Look in my eyes, surrender..."

Addison threw her head back against the kitchen cabinet and sighed. "Lacey, I'm not telling you how to sing it, but I kind of had a more… sultry flow in my head when I wrote it. Kind of like a bedroom whisper."

"Well, you're not the singer? Are you?"

Addison nodded. "You're right, and I don't want to be… I'm just saying I heard it differently in my head when I wrote it."

"Just sing it a little so she can get the idea. We've been trying to nail the sound down for over an hour. We've got to get to stage rehearsal."

"Tracey..." she warned. "I don't sing..."

"Princess..." he shot back. "Please?"

She rolled her eyes. "Fine…" she took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

"A dark night, remember

The sunrise, surrender

There isn't any other way

There isn't any other way

Hands tied, remember

It's suicide to surrender

There isn't any other way

There isn't any other way

I have a one-track mind

I have a one-track mind

There is a method to the madness, to the madness

Gotta have a one-track mind, ooh..."

She opened her eyes, only to be met with the shocked expressions of her band-mates.

"What?"

Lacey stormed out the room cursing at someone as she slammed the door of the bus.

"What the hell did I do now?"

"I have such the lady boner for you right now, Casey..." Stacey giggled as she got up and hugged her. "I'm going to go calm Lacey down."

Addison looked back at Tracey. "Seriously, why is she pissed off?"

"Because she feels threatened..." he shrugged as he stood up. "She'll get over it."

"What if she doesn't?"

"Then I guess we'll have a new singer."

"I'd be more than fine with you taking over..." she whispered.

"Yeah, I wasn't talking about me," he said pointing to her.

She could feel the panic rising in her chest. "I… I don't sing."

"Yes, you do, Addison," he smiled as he patted her head and walked out the room.

She closed her eyes and started counting backward from fifty, trying to keep her breathing calm and steady. _50...49...48...47...46...45...44...43...42..._

"Three words for you, Gorgeous..."

Her eyes opened to find Zed standing in the doorway. She exhaled shakily.

"Liquid. Fucking. Sex."

"What?"

He walked further into the room. "Your voice was liquid sex... Lacey can't sing that song."

"Yeah, well she's the singer. Sooo…"

"I know she can attempt to sing it, what I'm trying to say is that she will never make that song sound the way you can. Why don't you just ask Bucky if you can have this one."

"Z..." her chest tightened up again as her breaths became shallow. "I… I can't… I just..." she closed her eyes and started counting backward again. _41...40...39...38...37..._

"Hey..."

_36...35...34..._

She felt his hand brush across her cheek.

"You okay?"

_33...32...31… _

She needed a distraction to keep herself from having a full panic attack. She opened her eyes again to find him standing in front of her."Is anyone else on the bus?"

He shook his head and gave her a crooked smile. "No… what are you up to?"

"Bathroom. NOW."

* * *

"You were on fucking fire on stage tonight..." he whispered with peppered kisses against her over-heated, sweaty skin as they stole a few minutes alone on the rooftop between sets. "I hate hearing your songs coming out of her mouth, but goddamn do you come alive when you play them..."

She was pinned against the cold steel of the door, her legs wrapped around his waist as he ground against her.

"Z… you have to get on stage..." she panted, still pulling him into her further.

He kissed her hard, refusing to put her down. "Meet me back up here, after?"

"You've already fucked me six ways to Saskatchewan just in the last twenty-four hours..." she giggled.

"Is that a 'no'?"

She ran her tongue along his name on her lower lip and smiled as she unwrapped her legs and found her footing. "It's a 'we'll see'..."

He laughed and pulled her back into him, kissing her as he smiled. "That's a surprising deviation from the usual 'We're just friends' line you always give me."

She playfully pushed him away and opened the door for him. "Go… before they take the stage without you… or someone comes looking."

He threw her a wink and walked back inside.

She closed the door and leaned back against it, smiling as the cold night air blew around her. She knew she should be sticking to their 'just friends' promise, but she couldn't help it… Despite everything he put her through, she felt lighter when she was with him.

Her phone started to buzz in her pocket. She pulled it out and looked at the calendar reminder that flashed across the screen. Her world suddenly crumbling down once again.

.

* * *

She sat on the floor of the Presidential Suite of the Ritz Carlton in front of the wet bar, pouring tequila into one of the crystal glasses up to the brim. She downed it in one long gulp before throwing the glass as hard as she possibly could against the wall, shattering it into a hundred pieces. She grabbed another glass and poured as her phone sitting beside her restarted the song she had playing on repeat.

"**_Blackbird singing in the dead of night _**

**_Take these broken wings and learn to fly_**

**_All your life _**

**_You were only waiting for this moment to arise…."_**

As another glass crashed against the wall, she lit a cigarette and laid down on the ground, letting the lyrics wash over her.

* * *

"I fell in love with the devil (dig deep, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh)

It's killing me…." Addison stepped away from the microphone and removed her headphones. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"It's still missing something…" her father's voice sounded throughout the booth. "Let's take it again from the first chorus, Sweet-pea."

"Daddy! I need a break!" she snapped. "I've sung this song fifteen times, and each time feels like I'm driving a knife further into my heart!"

Dale looked at his daughter through the glass divider. "I know, kiddo. But...the only way to get over it is to sing through it. You wrote a damn good song. Now we just need to get that emotion on tape...Once more from the first chorus."

"Fine!" She put the headphones back on and stepped up to the microphone again as the backing track started up once more.

"But I-I-I-I-I can't stop the rush

And I-I-I-I-I can't give you up

No I-I-I-I-I, know you're no good for me

You're no good for me

I fell in love with the devil

And now I'm in trouble

I fell in love with the devil

I'm underneath his spell (ah)

Someone send me an angel

To lend me a halo

I fell in love with the devil

Please, save me from this hell (Oh-oh-oh-oh)

Got me playing with fire

Baby, hand me the lighter

Tastes just like danger

Chaotic anger

But I-I-I-I-I can't stop the rush

And I-I-I-I-I can't give you up

No I-I-I-I-I, know you're no good for me

You're no good for me

I fell in love with the devil

And now I'm in trouble

I fell in love with the devil

I'm underneath his spell (ah)

Someone send me an angel

To lend me a halo

I fell in love with the devil

Please, save me from this hell (Oh-oh-oh-oh)

Angels and devils always fight over me

Take me to heaven, wake me up from this dream

Even in sunlight a cloud shadows over me

It's now or never, wake me up from this dream

Dig deep, sink, sink, fear (ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh)

Dig deep, it's killing me

I fell in love with the devil (dig deep, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh)

And now I'm in trouble (sink, sink, fear, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh)

I fell in love with the devil (dig deep, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh)

It's killing me…."

Addison wiped tears away from her face, unaware that she had even started crying. Her dad's voice filled the room once more.

"We've got it!"

She rolled her eyes. "We better. I need a fucking break before I sing that again..."

"I know...why don't you come back in hear and help me mix."

She shook her head and took off the headphones, walking into the main room. "I need a break, Daddy," she sighed, wiping her eyes again and flopping down on one of the plush sofas, resting her head against Mason's shoulder and closing her eyes.

"Adds..." he said quietly.

"Don't."

"Every song you've written for this album so far..."

She sat up and glared at him. "Please don't start with this shit again, Mason… I tried to reach out to him after..." she took a shaky breath before standing up abruptly. "I can't do this right now..."

"All I'm saying is..."

They were distracted from their almost daily argument by the sound of Dale coughing loudly and persistently.

"Daddy? You okay?"

He nodded his head as he stood up, pulling a blood-covered hand away from his mouth. Addison gasped and ran to his side just as he collapsed into her arms.

* * *

"**_Blackbird singing in the dead of night _**

**_Take these sunken eyes and learn to see _**

**_All your life _**

**_You were only waiting for this moment to be free"_**

* * *

"Cancer cells have a higher metabolic rate than noncancerous cells. Because of this high level of chemical activity, cancer cells show up as bright spots on PET scans..."

The words blended together as she looked at the images in front of them.

"Is that supposed to light up like a Christmas tree?" she asked quietly, gripping her father's hand tighter as he lay in the hospital bed.

"Unfortunately, no."

Dale took a deep breath, making him cough.

"In stage IV, the cancer has metastasized, or spread beyond its original location into other areas of the body… like the lungs."

"How long?" Dale asked.

"Daddy! Don't think like that!"

He looked up at her. "Addie, I'm being realistic. Please."

She closed her eyes and exhaled, calming herself down. "Fine..." She looked over to the doctor waiting for his answer.

"The five-year survival rate is about 6%."

"How. Long."

"If we start treatments immediately...anywhere from 6-24 months."

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

"Bucky..." she whispered, holding the phone in a shaky hand as she leaned against the wall of the hospital hallway.

"Addison? What's wrong? Are you in trouble?"

She sniffed and wiped away the tears that had started to fall. "No. I'm not in trouble..."

The line was silent for a few moments. "Ok… then what's going on. You never call."

"… It's Daddy..."

* * *

**_Blackbird fly, blackbird fly _**

**_Into the light of the dark black night _**

* * *

"I'm going to grab something from the cafeteria," Bucky said as he stood up and stretched. "Want anything?"

"I would kill for a snickers bar," Dale laughed.

Addison shook her head. "Yeah, I don't think so. That last time you ate during a chemo session it didn't end well. If you're feeling alright after that bag is finished, we'll see about food."

He stuck his tongue out at her. "Buzzkill."

"Yup." She turned to look at Bucky. "Can you grab me a coffee?"

"Sure thing, Addie-loo," he whispered as he leaned down and kissed the top of her head.

She playfully pushed him away. "Ugh… don't call me that."

"Now, now, children… behave."

"Yes, Daddy..." Addison replied with a heavy high roll as Bucky walked off. She looked back down to her notebook and let out a frustrated sigh.

"Come up with anything good?"

"Not really," she said as she scratched out a few lines.

"Maybe I can help..."

"Daddy, you don't have to do that. I don't want you working right now."

He let out a soft laugh. "Sweet Pea, I'm stuck in this chair while I have deadly chemicals pumped into my body… Helping you write a song isn't work, it's a distraction."

She shook her head and smiled. "Whatever you say," she whispered, sliding her notebook over to him.

"Oh, no. I'm a producer, I need to hear it."

She looked around the room.

"Don't worry about them. Consider them a captive audience."

Rolling her eyes she took the notebook back from him and sat up a little straighter.

"Oh, there isn't one thing left you could say

I'm sorry it's too late

I'm breaking free from these memories

Gotta let it go, just let it go

I've said goodbye

Set it all on fire

Gotta let it go, just let it go..."

"You had to get another line about fire in there, didn't you," he teased with a wink.

She shrugged her shoulders. "Don't know what you're talking about, Daddy..."

"...Riiiiight…" he laughed. "It's a good start… What if we made it a duet?"

"I think the drugs are officially going to your head," she laughed, nodding towards the bag hanging from the IV stand.

"Ha. Ha. Ha. I might have chemo-brain, but I'm still good at my job."

"This is true..."

"Speaking of being good at my job… what would you think about having Bartholomew manage you?"

She stared at him, mouth open for a moment. "First you let Mason help behind the board, and now you want Bucky to be my manager? Now I know the drugs are going to your head!"

"Hear me out. He's been doing a great job helping me with the other artists. He doesn't have the ear to be a producer like Mason does, but the kid has a head for business, and he's showing a real knack for the industry."

"Shouldn't he be like, carrying out hits? Or learning how to launder money?"

"Addison… You know he doesn't want that kind of life. He's been there for this family through everything. He loves you. He will always watch out for you and put your best interests first."

"Does he even WANT to be a manager?" she asked skeptically.

"He's the one who asked me."

* * *

**_Blackbird fly, blackbird fly_**

**_Into the light of the dark black night_**

**_._**

* * *

"He kissed my lips

I tasted your mouth

He pulled me in

I was disgusted with myself

Cause when I'm with him

I am thinking of you

Thinking of you

What you would do if

You were the one

Who was spending the night

Oh I wish that I

Was looking into your eyes

Looking into your eyes

Looking into your eyes

Oh won't you walk through

And bust in the door

And take me away

Oh no more mistakes

Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay"

"Ugh," Mason said from the other side of the booth. "Another heartbreak ballad? Really? Shouldn't you throw in SOME variety?"

She flipped him off and grabbed her guitar as she stepped back up to the microphone. "You want variety, fine…." She put on a fake smile and began to strum out an upbeat tempo.

"Now, I want you to stop insisting that I'm not a lost cause

'Cause I've been through a lot

Really all I've got is just to stay pissed off

If it's all right by you...

Just let me cry a little bit longer

I ain't gon' smile if I don't want to

Hey man, we all can't be like you

I wish we were all rose-colored too

My rose-colored boy…"

She smiled even wider, showing her teeth and batting her eyelashes before raising her finger and flipping him off again.

"Ha. Ha. Ha." Mason replied over the intercom. "Bash me all you want… At least it was different."

She rolled her eyes as she took her headphones off and walked into the mixing room. "So… when did you get here... and where is my Dad?" She looked at him a little longer, "And why are your eyes so dilated..."

"I was exhausted so I took a bump."

"Mason..."

"Yeah, I know. Spare me the lecture. Anyway, I got here just as you were starting the take. Daddy Dale asked me to take over for a minute...said he wasn't feeling well."

"Shit!" Addison ran down the hall, throwing open the door to her father's room. "Daddy?!" She could hear him throwing up from the en suite. She rushed over and opened the door. "Oh my god! Are you okay?!"

"Addison, get out. I'm fine," he croaked out before collapsing back down.

She ignored him and carefully walked over, avoiding the mess on the floor.

"Addis..." he tried to protest, but dry heaved again.

She wet a washcloth and placed it on his neck, smoothing his hair back from his forehead before starting to clean up.

Dale sighed and rested his head against the wall. "You shouldn't have to be doing this, Sweet-pea."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Daddy, I told you... quit being stubborn and let me take care of you… And I swear if you apologize for being sick again..." she stepped over to the shower and turned it on. "Let's just get you cleaned up, okay?"

After helping him shower and get dressed, Addison changed her clothes and made her way downstairs to where Mason and her father were watching television.

"Daddy?" she said nervously. "I just invited Bree over."

He turned to look at her. "Bree is always welcome, Sweet-pea. You know that."

She nodded her head. "Yeah, but I asked her over for a specific reason…"

"And what would that be?"

"Because Bree has a medical marijuana prescription."

Dale sighed and threw his head back against the couch. "For the last time, Addison. I don't need it."

"Daddy, you haven't kept anything down in months! You're in pain all the time! I'm not going to just sit around and watch you get worse! If there's even the smallest of chances that smoking pot will help with the nausea and reduce your pain, why the hell not go for it?!" She yelled, wiping the tears away from her eyes as they fell.

He stood up and hugged her. "You're right… I'll give it try."

She sniffled against his shirt. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Why are we waiting for Bree? I have some in my car," Mason called over.

She flipped him off again. "Because lord only knows what yours is laced with. Now be quiet and put Sponge Bob back on."

zzzzzzzzzzzzz

"You seem to know how to do that a little too well, Sweet-Pea..." Dale said as she rolled and lit the joint for him.

"Don't know what you're talking about Daddy!"

He arched his brow at her.

"Don't give me that look. Just take a puff and hold it in."

"Then don't bullshit me."

"Fine… I may have smoked once."

"Bullshit," Mason said under his breath as he walked over to the refrigerator, helping himself to a soda.

"What was that, Mason?" Dale asked as he exhaled.

"Oh, I was just saying she's full of shit. We've been smoking since we were fourteen."

"MASON!"

"Fourteen?!"

"Daddy… don't get worked up…"

"I'm in my fifties and I've never smoked… and I'm in the music industry!"

"You might not have smoked, but you've definitely been high," Mason laughed.

"MASON!"

"What?"

"Yeah, what?!" Dale asked looking between the three of them.

"Well, you remember when you ate like half the pan of brownies Bree had made for Ze…." Mason caught himself before he finished saying the name. "Well yeah… Those were um...pot brownies."

Addison threw her hands up in the air and groaned. "Any more word vomit, Mase?"

"Nope… I mean the only other secrets we've kept that long are the piercings and tattoos… OH! And that time you went to re..."

Bree smacked her hand over his mouth and shot him a death glare. "I swear I'm going to drown you in the Pacific and make it look like an accident..." she whispered.

He pushed her hand away. "Not my fault! I'm majorly high right now!"

"Let's go get tattoos."

They were all stunned into silence.

Addison tilted her head and gave her father an odd look. "What?"

"I've always wanted one… We should go get tattoos," Dale said with a look of determination on his face.

"Who are you and what have you done with my Daddy? Mason just told you… Aren't you going to yell at me? Or lecture me? Or at least give me that disapproving Dad look you've perfected over the years?"

"Nope. I'm too tired and you're an adult."

"Wow, Adds… Who would have guessed your Dad would be totally cool with you having like eleven piercings and three tattoos!"

"Eleven?! Where would you even have eleven places to pierce?"

"So! Daddy, what were you saying about wanting a tattoo?" She asked anxiously, trying to direct his attention elsewhere.

Dale shook his head. "You really have three?"

She nodded her head and shrugged. "You can never just have one."

"That's potato chips, Sweet-Pea..."

"That's what I said!"

"Boy, you better shut your mouth! You're on my list right now!" Bree warned.

"So….I'm guessing you know a good place to go then?" Dale asked Addison, ignoring the other two.

"I do… but you're not going." Addison said as she pulled out her phone.

"Why not?"

"You're not leaving the house."

"And why not?"

"Um...cancer? chemo? The fact that you have zero immune system at the moment? I mean, take your pick, Daddy…" She cracked a small smile, "But if you are certain you want a tattoo… who am I to stop you… I can have someone come to the house…. At least then I can limit your exposure."

"You're awfully responsible for someone who's high… Is she usually like this?" Dale asked Mason and Bree with a chuckle.

"Unless she's drinking vodka."

Addison rolled her eyes. "I only took one puff… my tolerance is considerably higher than that. Besides," she looked between Mason and her father and shook her head, "someone needs to be responsible right now."

* * *

**_Blackbird singing in the dead of night _**

**_Take these broken wings and learn to fly_**

**_All your life_**

* * *

Addison sat watching her father sleep. Silently counting his breaths.

"Adds..." Bucky called quietly from the bedroom door. "We've got to get going… Mason's already there."

"I'm not going," she whispered, not taking her eyes off her father. "I'm not leaving him alone."

Bucky walked into the room and knelt beside her. "We've got two nurses in the house at all times… he won't be alone… Addison, you need to perform at the showcase tonight… It's important! Your entire career depends on what the execs think of the album so far!"

"Bucky! I don't give a shit about my career right now! I can deal with it all...after…" she whisper yelled, as she wiped at her eyes. "You heard the doctors. So for the last time… I am not going anywhere! I'm staying right here. End of discussion!"

"Listen to your manager Sweet-Pea," Dale rasped out from his bed.

Addison's head snapped over to his direction. "Oh, Daddy, I didn't mean to wake you!" her voice heavy with emotion.

He tried to sit up but struggled. Addison and Bucky were by his side instantly, helping him. Addison propped a pillow under him and Bucky picked up a glass of water for him to sip from.

He took a small sip and looked over to Addison. "Don't be stubborn."

She let out a soft laugh. "I don't know how else to be. I get it from you."

He weakly raised his hand and touched her cheek. "You were born to perform. You have to go."

"But, I..." a tear rolled down her face. "I need you with me."

"I'll always be with you… you're the love of my life."

She smiled through her tears and hugged him carefully. "I love you, Daddy."

"I love you, too, Sweet-pea." He leaned his head against hers as he looked over to Bucky. "Take care of her, son..."

Bucky wiped at his own eyes. "I will." He leaned down and hugged them both. "Come on, Addie-loo..."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Hey, Adds," Mason said hugging her as she walked into the dressing room backstage. "How's Daddy Dale?"

She gave him a tight smile. "Not good, Mase. Even since you saw him a few days ago… He's lost so much more weight… I can practically lift him," she said in a whisper.

"Damn."

"Yeah..." she quickly dabbed at her eyes to stop the tears from falling and ruining her eye makeup any more than it already was. "Dr. Collins and Dr. Hunter came by the house yesterday…" her voice trailed off.

"What'd they say?"

"Oh, Mase..." she threw her arms around him and buried her face into his neck.

"Shhh…. it's okay…." he whispered, smoothing her hair.

"No… it's not… they said at this rate of decline..." she couldn't stop the tears from falling any longer. "It could be any day now."

Mason's hand stilled on her hair. "Addison..." he whispered, his own voice cracking.

"I know..." she pulled back and wiped her eyes. "But… he was lucid enough to insist I come tonight, so… that's a good sign… right?"

He nodded his head and cracked a small smile. "I'd think so."

Addison took a deep breath and forced a smile. "How do I look?"

"Beautiful… like always… maybe a little more punk rock with the smeared eyeliner, but… it works."

She hugged him again. "Thanks, Mase..."

"You know I'd do anything for you." He placed a soft kiss on the top of her head.

"Come on you two…" Bucky said as he walked up to them. "Showtime."

zzzzzzzzzzzz

Addison looked behind her to where Mason was sitting behind his drum kit. He gave her a large smile and an encouraging nod. She closed her eyes and exhaled before turning back towards the audience. Bucky was right. She needed to be here tonight. She opened her eyes and let the spotlight soak into her soul.

"Love's my religion but he was my faith

Something so sacred so hard to replace

Fallin' for him was like fallin' from grace…

All wrapped in one he was so many sins

Would have done anything, everything for him

And if you ask me I would do it again..."

As she sang, she could feel the tension leaving her body.

"No need to imagine

'Cause I know it's true

They say "all good boys go to heaven"

But bad boys bring heaven to you

I still remember the moment we met

The touch that he planted

The garden he left

I guess the rain was just half that effect

No need to imagine

'Cause I know it's true

They say "all good boys go to heaven"

But bad boys bring heaven to you

It's automatic

It's just what they do

They say "all good boys go to heaven"

But bad boys bring heaven to you

Ooh

Ooh

Ooh"

She smiled as the executives around her broke out into applause. This was what she was meant to do. It didn't matter what was going on in her life. As long as she could perform, everything would be fine.

"Thank you for having me here tonight to play a little of what I've been working on," she said into the microphone with a large smile. "This next song..." A movement from the side of the stage caught her eye. She glanced over to see Bucky on his knees, clutching his phone to his chest.

* * *

**_You were only waiting for this moment to arise_**

* * *

Addison knelt on the cold ground as she placed a bouquet of sweet-pea flowers next to the marble placard bearing her father's name. Her fingers traced the fresh engraving. "What am I supposed to do, Bucky?" she whispered through her tears.

He ran a hand through her long blond hair and held her as close as he could.

"First, you're going to get off the ground. Those are $1500 slacks you're muddying up, not to mention the $700 heals."

They both turned around suddenly.

"Mother...What are you doing here? This is for family only."

"Addison, my ex-husband and the father of my only child just passed away… This is no time to be hostile."

"You're more than welcome to attend the public memorial service scheduled next week. I'm sure there will be enough media there to accomplish whatever it is you're trying to do." Bucky told her as he helped Addison up to her feet.

Missy ignored him and walked closer to the plot. "Believe it or not, I did love your father."

"Mother!" Addison snapped. "You don't get to be here! Ever!"

"Oh, you're not still upset with me? Are you? I would have thought you got your anger out when you burned my house down."

"Hey!" Bucky interjected. "There is no proof that she did that."

"Not still upset?! NOT STILL UPSET?!"

Bucky grabbed onto her arm. "Sis… she's not worth the jail time or the press coverage."

Addison took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "I can not do this right now, Mother. I just lost my Daddy...I can't...I won't have this conversation with you right now. Not standing where we are… You have no right to be here...Please leave before I have security escort you off the premises."

* * *

**_You were only waiting for this moment to arise_**

* * *

Bucky and Mason sat on either side of her holding her hands as they listened to artist after artist describe what it was like to know and work with the legend that was Dale Donnelly until it was Addison's turn.

"Are you sure you're up for this?" Bucky whispered before she stepped out on stage.

"I'm sure..."

He nodded and kissed the top of her head. "Alright then… Knock 'em out, Addie-loo."

"Thanks, B..." She picked up her guitar and walked onto the stage. When her eyes adjusted to the spotlight, she looked around at all the faces that had come out to celebrate the life of her father. It was staggering just how many people he had touched. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"What more can be said about my father than what has already been said? So… instead of regaling you with tales of him tucking me in and reading me a bedtime story while many of you were pulling an all-nighter in the studio below my bedroom, or of the time he rushed out of the Grammy's early because I had a dance recital… I'm going to sing the song he sang to me every night before I closed my eyes..."

Her fingers began to strum out a delicate melody.

"Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these sunken eyes and learn to see

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to be free

Blackbird, fly….Blackbird….fly…..Into….the...li…."

Everything around her started to blur.

"of… the..."

She couldn't breathe. The room started to spin. Then there was darkness.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"How are you feeling?" Mason whispered as he ran his hand through her matted hair.

She slowly sat up and looked around. "How did..."

He shook his head and lightly pushed her back down. "Doctor said it was a panic attack and that you need to rest."

She flipped him off and sat up. "Where's Bucky?"

"He left to bring Bree home a little bit ago. Said he was going to do some media damage control as well."

"So he'll be gone for a while?"

"Sounds like it."

She nodded and stood up. "Good..." She walked over to her closet and went straight towards the safe.

"What are you doing?"

She ignored him and pressed in her code.

When he saw what she had pulled out, he sat down on the ground next to her. "Addison…."

"Mase… Spare me the lecture… I don't want to feel anything right now."

"Why do you even have any of this anymore?"

She sighed and stood up, walking back into her room and sitting on her bed. "It's what I had here before Paris." She quickly got to work dumping the white powder onto a small mirror.

"Adds… are you sure? Bucky will kill you if he ever finds out."

She looked up and met his eyes. "I'm counting on that."

"Well, I'm not letting you do it by yourself… Cut another line."

* * *

**_You were only waiting for this moment to arise_**

* * *

She flipped her hair back up and looked into the mirror, examining the home dye job more closely. Not perfect, but it would do. Nobody from the press or anyone she knew would be looking for dark hair. She walked back into her room where Mason was sound asleep in a tangle of still sweaty sheets.

"Please forgive me… one day..." she whispered as she picked up two heavy suitcases.

As she drove along the coast, her phone started to vibrate. Bucky, Bree, Mason… all on a constant, incessant loop. She pulled over along the side of the highway and got out of the car. She stared at the moon's reflection over the Pacific. Without a second thought, she threw her phone as hard and as far as she could into the dark water below.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** So… More pieces of the past revealed and a couple more mysteries thrown in****to the mix.**

**This chapter was extremely difficult for me to write, but I feel like I had to do it at some point. **

**I started writing as a form of therapy to help me after my dad passed away from cancer. **

**When I started On The Edge, I knew that this chapter would be included. It was actually mostly written before I started on Chapter 2. I briefly touched on the loss of a parent and the grief associated with it in Our Year/Watch Us Shine, but with this story being a bit grittier, I felt like I could write more of my personal experience into it. Watching a parent fight, suffer, and lose their battle with cancer is absolute hell. If anyone has had to go through it, I am so sorry and I'm here if you need to talk or vent. **

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**(Yes, I know there were A LOT)**

**-Do I Wanna Know: Artic Monkeys**

**-One Track Mind: Thirty Seconds To Mars**

**-Fell In Love With The Devil: Avril Lavigne**

**-Let Me Go: Avril Lavigne **

**-Thinking of You: Katie Perry**

**-Rose Colored Boy: Paramore**

**-Heaven: Julia Michaels**

**-Black Bird: The Beatles **


	21. Dark Side

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

**Chapter 21**

**DARK SIDE**

Zed shivered as he sat on the rooftop waiting. It had been nearly an hour since his set had ended. "Well..." he whispered to himself, "Maybe her 'We'll see...' really was a 'no'." His phone buzzed in his pocket.

"Hey Bonz," he said as he answered it.

"Yo, Z… we're all loaded up and ready to go. You and Addison might want to start making your way down here," Bonzo whispered.

Zed ran his hand through his hair. "I'll be right down, but Adds was a no show."

The line was silent except for the sounds of Bonzo opening the door of the bus. "What do you mean she was a no show?" he asked a little louder now that he was away from everyone.

"She's not up here. I figured she was on the bus with everyone else."

"Dude… she's not here. Bucky has been trying to get in touch with her for the last twenty minutes."

Zed jumped to his feet. "Does Tracey know where she is?"

"No, man. Bucky already asked him."

"I'm on my way down..." He hung up and flung the door open, taking the stairs two at a time. He didn't stop running until he was back outside in the back parking lot where the bus was parked. He took a moment to collect himself and calm the rising panic he felt in his chest before casually strolling towards the bus. He stopped when he heard Bucky's voice coming from the rear of the bus.

"Oh thank fuck, Addison! Where the hell are you?" Bucky whisper yelled into the phone.

Zed quietly peered around the corner, to find Bucky pacing back and forth behind the bus.

"Why the fuck are you at the Ritz! We're supposed to be driving tonight! We have a show tomorrow! How could you flake out on me?!… I swear to Christ if you're…."

Zed watched as Bucky stopped pacing.

"What do you mean look at the date?" He pulled his phone away, his face falling almost instantly. "Shit...I'm sorry, Adds...I didn't even realize…no...I'm fine… I just..." He took a deep breath and leaned his head against the back of the bus. "I can't believe I didn't notice… No, absolutely not! I'm not letting you pay for the missed show. No…." Bucky let out a loud sigh. "Fine...I'll see you Sunday morning." He hung up the phone and slid down to the ground, cradling his head in his hands.

Zed quietly walked back towards the bus and climbed on board.

* * *

"Band meeting!" Bucky called out as he opened the door.

Zed looked up from his phone. "What's up, B?"

He sighed and shook his head as he climbed up the bus steps. "I'll tell you as soon as everyone else gets in here…. BAND MEETING! HELLOOOOO!"

Everyone else slowly gathered in the front of the bus around him.

"Casey has a 24-hour bug... She's at urgent care now. They said she shouldn't travel," Bucky lied smoothly.

"What?!" Lacey yelled, standing up and walking towards him. "We have a gig tomorrow!"

"I know, I know...but we need to cancel."

They all groaned.

"You'll still get paid for it, I'm taking care of it, okay," Bucky offered, trying to calm them.

Zed stood up and stretched. "So, we have the night off?"

"Yeah...We're here until Sunday morning at least."

"Good deal. I'm out," he said grabbing his jacket.

"Where are you going?" Eliza asked looking over to him.

He shrugged. "For a walk?… Take in some sites...Don't know, yet."

"Stay out of trouble, please," Bucky whined. "I have enough shit to deal with."

"Sure thing, Boss," he said with a salute.

When he stepped into the cold night air he shivered and zipped his black leather jacket as he walked to the front of the club and towards the waiting Uber he had already called.

* * *

Zed strode across the impressive lobby of the Downtown Ritz Carlton with purpose, straight up to the reception desk. When the attendant looked up to greet him, he flashed her his best smile.

She blushed and smiled back at him. "Hi, how can I help you this evening?"

"My girlfriend is traveling for work and I wanted to surprise her. Would it be possible for you to tell me which room she's in?"

Her smile faltered. "I'm sorry sir, I'm not at liberty to disclose information about the guests we have staying with us."

He leaned in closer to her. "Please, she's been touring for months. It would mean so much..." he said softly, laying on the charm.

"I could get in trouble..."

"I won't tell if you don't," he whispered with a wink.

She blushed again. "What's the name?"

"Casey Jacobs."

She typed the name into the computer and frowned. "I'm sorry, sir…"

"Please… call me Zed."

She smiled shyly. "I'm sorry, Zed. We don't have a Casey Jacobs listed."

"Hmm… she may be using a different alias… musicians," he shrugged with a smile. "How about Meg Jacobs?"

She typed the name in and looked up to him, shaking her head. "I'm sorry, there's not a Meg Jacobs registered, either."

"What about Milo Taylor?"

"Sir, I can't..."

"It's Zed… Please?"

She hesitated for a moment, before entering that name into the system as well. "No...I don't have anyone registered under that name either. Are you sure she's at this hotel?"

"Is there another Ritz in the area?"

"No. This is the only one."

"Then I'm sure..." he stilled. "Can you check just one more name for me?"

"Zed, I really shouldn't be checking any names for you."

"I promise this is the last one..." he pleaded. "Please?"

"You must really love her to be going through all this just to surprise her."

"More than she knows..."

"Okay, what's the name?"

He smiled "Addison Donnelly."

"Yes! We have an Addison Donnelly staying with us. She's in the Presidential Suite, top floor…

Zed's face lit up. "Thank you!"

"Wow… Presidential Suite… You said she's a musician?"

"We both are," he threw her a wink and made a dash towards the elevators.

The sound of Blackbird filled the hall as he walked towards the entrance of the suite. As he reached the doors, he could hear the unmistakable sound of her crying. He took a deep breath and knocked.

The music stopped.

"Bucky, I said I was fine. I just can't pretend right now…" She opened the door and looked up. "Zed..." Her face crumpled as she opened the door fully to let him in.

"My God, what happened?" he asked, his voice on the edge of panic as he looked around. There was shattered glass across the floor and an ashtray full of half-smoked cigarettes. The familiar urge to defend and protect her rose up in him, and for a moment his vision went red at the thought of someone harming her. "Are you alright?" he asked pulling her into him.

She couldn't speak, though. She could only bury her face in his neck and cry. Giant, wracking sobs that shook her entire body.

A sudden panic hit him. He had seen her upset before, but he had never seen her like this. "You have to tell me what happened," he said to the top of her head as he held her. "Addison, baby...Look at me!" He grabbed her by the chin and forced her swollen eyes to meet his. "Did someone hurt you? Tell me!"

Addison shook her head quickly.

"Then what's wrong?" The blinding rage began to subside, replaced quickly with the need to hold her as close as possible.

"Just...it's just...I need...I need you..." her words were getting caught between her gasps and hiccups.

"You need me to what?"

"No...I just...need you!" she looked up at him with enormous blue eyes that were puffy and red, the wet lashes surrounding them sticking to her skin in dark points. She had never looked more beautiful to him. "Make it all go away! Please!"

Zed leaned down and lifted her in his arms, carrying her into the bedroom. He laid her down gently and followed after her, kissing her soft lips and tasting her tears. She wrapped her arms around his neck and held him tightly, returning his kisses with violent fervor. She would only let him go long enough for him to remove her clothing, and after each article was removed she would grasp onto him again as if she were reassuring herself that he was still there.

Once he had worked his own jeans off he covered her completely, and when he slid himself into her welcoming heat they both cried out. He moved inside her slowly, worshiping her body with his own, and as each new tear fell he would kiss it away.

* * *

Addison woke mid-afternoon, immediately feeling the deep ache in her muscles. As she moved and stretched, each sore spot brought back another vivid memory of the night before. Thinking back through the foggy, sleepy memories, she couldn't believe how he had been there to help comfort her through the night.

She hadn't been able to sleep for longer than an hour or two at a time. It wasn't that she hadn't been comfortable next to him on the bed- quite the opposite, actually- but for some reason, she kept waking up in a panic and reaching for him in the dark. His body was so in tune with hers that it was almost scary. Every time her hand would land on his warm, toned flesh, he would pull her to him and love her all over again until she was knocked out from sheer exhaustion.

The last time, he had been facing away from her on his side and she had simply rolled over and hugged him, pressing herself against his back to feel his smooth skin on her breasts. Having every intention of drifting back to sleep. However, as soon as his body had recognized her presence, he had rolled back over and grabbed a condom before lifting her up and placing her in his lap, directly over his erection. When she had looked down at him she was amazed to see that he was barely awake, yet it didn't stop him from moving inside her and dragging her with him to a drowsy but passionate finish.

Now completely sated and sprawled across his torso, she lay there for a few minutes and enjoyed the steady rhythm of his heartbeat and the rise and fall of his chest as he slept. Glancing down, she stifled a gasp, unable to believe that he was actually hard again.

Looking at the long, smooth shaft that was currently curved

back toward his stomach, Addison whimpered to herself, wanting so badly to crawl on top of him again. However, she could already feel the soreness growing between her legs; she knew that she was going to have trouble walking as it was.

"It would be a shame to let that go to waste, though," she whispered to herself as she slipped away and repositioned herself between his legs. She watched his features closely, looking for any sign that he was stirring before leaning forward and dragging the tip of her tongue all the way up the underside of his erection. She started at the base and finished at the top, before looking up at his sleeping face.

He moaned softly, his brow furrowing in confusion, but his eyes were still closed. She repeated her actions, going even slower, and this time she swirled her tongue around the broad tip as she finished. He grunted a little louder, and she watched as his cock twitched in response, yet it still wasn't enough contact to wake him. One more time she licked him, but when she reached the top, she slipped her plump lips around him and sucked him deep inside her mouth.

"Mmm," he groaned, slowly coming to. Zed opened his eyes just in time to see her looking up at him, a wicked gleam in her eye as she bobbed her head up and down his length.

"Fuck!" He tried to keep his eyes from crossing, instantly feeling an overdose of sensation. Her mouth was so warm, her tongue so slick, and he could feel every stroke as it swirled around him. "God, baby," he gasped, locking eyes with her again.

Their gaze never broke as she moved on him, sucking him to the back of her throat and sliding back up again. When she saw him finally bite his bottom lip and close his eyes from the pleasure, it looked so erotic that Addison couldn't keep from moaning loudly around him, which sent a wave of vibrations down his length.

Zed's eyes flew open. "Christ!" He sat up until he could brace himself on his elbows, allowing him a much better view of her lovely wake up call. The room was still fairly dark from the curtains, but Zed watched her so intently that his eyes quickly adjusted to the light. "You look so fucking sexy doing that." She met his eyes again and winked before setting up a steady pace, the action was so arousing that he felt himself grow impossibly harder in her mouth.

Addison took her time and enjoyed herself, running her hands up the insides of his thighs lightly, causing him to jerk and twitch.

"Oh...oh fuck, baby. Baby, look at me!" His words were interrupted by rapid panting and the sharp thrust of his hips.

The moment her beautiful eyes made contact with his, Zed cried out loudly, exploding in a violent torrent of fluid that sent hot spurts down her throat. Unable to keep his eyes on her like he wanted, he squeezed them shut and threw his head back, drowning in the powerful waves of his release. Addison sucked him even harder as he rode it out, refusing to stop until his shaking had subsided.

When he finally looked finished, Addison sat up and smiled.

"Get the fuck up here. Now," he snarled, his eyes full of fire.

Before she could scramble up his body, she felt his hands gripping her sides and lifting her, pulling her all the way up until she was perched over his face. He looked up at her long enough to grunt something that sounded like "so fucking good" before pulling her down on him, directly over his mouth. He used everything he had to stoke her swollen folds: his tongue, his lips, his nose, even his chin. Pulling her down against him, he devoured her, lapping up all of her juices until she was bucking wildly, grinding herself into his face.

When her own release hit her, it was enough to make her shake so hard that she fell over, crumpling into a heap next to him. He pulled her to his side, holding her tightly and kissing her with all of the passion that he could no longer deny. She kissed him back hungrily, only stopping when she was too exhausted to continue.

They collapsed together again, Addison resuming her favorite spot on his chest. As they both tried to catch their breath, she peppered his warm skin with light kisses while he traced the ink along her bare back.

Addison looked up at him. "God...that was..."

"Un-fucking-believable," Zed groaned.

"Exactly."

The afternoon light was creeping into the room, landing on the tips of his hair and making it glow the most amazing shade of emerald. Addison looked into his sparkling brown eyes, trying to ignore the violent pounding that it caused in her chest.

He gazed back into her eyes and ran his thumb down her cheek. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Talk about what?"

"Whatever had you so upset last night?" There was a genuine look of concern on his face. "Bucky told everyone you were sick… obviously, that was a lie."

She nodded her head. "Obviously..."

"Than what happened?"

"It's pretty heavy..."

"Just tell me what you can," he whispered, running his hand comfortingly through her hair.

She took a deep shaky breath. "Today makes three years since Daddy died..."

Zed's hand stilled. He sat up and pulled her into a tight hug. "Oh my God, Adds...I had no idea… I'm so sorry, Gorgeous," he whispered, trying his best to keep his own tears from falling.

She sniffled and buried her face into his shoulder. "It was cancer…I took care of him the whole time. I rarely left his side."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

She pulled back and looked into his eyes. "Why would I have?"

"Because we're friends..."

She wiped at her eyes and smiled. "But we weren't."

"Even still...You can always come to me," he smiled, kissing her forehead. "I will hold you all night long if that's what you need."

"You did a whole lot more than just hold me last night, mister," Addison laughed into his neck before planting a few light kisses there.

"Only because that was what you needed. You asked me to make it go away, so I did...Don't get me wrong, I'm still reeling from how amazing last night was, but if you had told me just to hold you, I would have."

Trying to lighten the mood, Addison laughed. "I'm not sure we could be so chaste together. I probably would have jumped on top of you five minutes after we lay down...I always have had a bad habit of throwing myself at you."

"A habit I fully support..."

"I'm sure you do…" She looked up at him and gave him a sad smile. "How did you know where I was?"

"I overheard Bucky."

"Bucky..." she sniffled "How's he doing?"

"He's fine… why?"

"Just…" she shrugged and wiped her eyes. "...Just worried he's pissed off that we're missing a gig, that's all."

He hugged her tight and kissed the top of her head. "Well, someone offering to pay everyone softened the blow, I'm sure… Speaking of small fortunes being paid, why the Ritz?"

"It's opulent, overpriced, and… It seemed like a Donnelly thing to do."

"That it does," he laughed softly. "I was surprised your reservation was under your actual name."

She shrugged again and buried her face into his neck. "It's the one time a year I fully embrace it… Every other day… I'm too ashamed."

"Of what, beautiful?"

"That this is who I've become."

He took her face in his hands. "Listen to me..."

She reluctantly met his eyes.

"You. Are. Amazing. You always have been, and you always will be."

"Z… you don't know me anymore."

"I may not know every detail that's shaped you, but I know who you are." He leaned in and kissed her softly.

She pushed him back softly and shook her head. "You don't want to know this part of me..."

Welcome to my darkness, I been here a while  
Clouding up the sunlight, hurting for a smile  
or something, but something always turns into nothing…" She wiped at her eyes.

"Acting like I'm heartless, I do it all the time  
That don't mean I'm scarless, that don't mean I'm fine  
But you'll see, when someone else makes you this way…

I can be your reckless, you can be my stain  
I can be your heartache, you can be my shame  
When you're feeling reckless, when you're feeling chained  
When there's nothing left but pain

Welcome to my dark side..."

He wrapped his arms around her. "You can try to push me away, but I'm not going anywhere, Addison… Forget about all of it for today. It's just you and me. Addison and Zed. A and Z. Alpha and Omega. The begi…."

"The beginning and the end of everything," she whispered as he dried her tears.

"Exactly… let me take care of you, Baby..." he said as he leaned down and kissed her lips.

She nodded her head and wrapped her arms around him, deepening their kiss.

.

* * *

"I forgot how good room service was," Zed moaned around a piece of steak.

Addison giggled softly and leaned in as he held up his fork for her to take a bite. "Mmm… I should have gotten that instead of the chicken."

He laughed and stole a kiss. "I told you so."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah..." she yawned.

"Alright, beautiful," Zed said as he pushed their plates aside. "How about a soak in the tub?"

"That sounds amazing," she sighed, her heavy eyelids slowly blinking.

"Okay, you stay here and rest, I'll be right back. I'm going to draw us a bath."

"Draw us a bath..." she giggled sleepily. "So proper sounding..."

Zed laughed and leaned down to kiss her. "Don't be a brat."

"I don't know how else to be," she said through another yawn.

"I'll be right back."

Zed disappeared from the room, and before long Addison had drifted off into a light slumber. When she awoke a little while later, it was to the gentle tugging of Zed's fingers on the tie of the plush hotel robe she was wearing. He slipped the robe off of her and scooped her up into his arms, tucking her against his chest.

"Come on, Sleeping Beauty," he whispered as he carried her into the large bathroom.

"Oh wow!" she gasped, holding her head up and looking around as they entered the large bathroom. "Zed, did you just do this? It's so beautiful!" He had lit

several candles so that the bathroom had a bright golden glow, and he had a fresh bottle of tequila in a bucket of ice on the marble countertop. "How did you..."

He let out a soft laugh and kissed the top of her head. "It's amazing what this hotel will do for their guests staying in the Presidential Suite…" he said in a mock snobby voice, making her giggle. "I thought it might be more relaxing than the harsh lights in here. I want you to be able to just soak and relax. I know how emotionally draining it's been today."

"And physically taxing," she purred.

"Mmmm, very true," he smirked, setting her down by the edge of the tub. "Now, go ahead and climb in."

Addison stepped carefully into the huge tub, sitting down with a loud sigh in the warm water, laughing as the thick layer of bubbles rose up and tickled her chin before settling down lower around her chest.

"God, this feels amazing," she moaned, laying her head back against the edge.

"I'm happy you like it, Baby," Zed smiled, grabbing the bottle of tequila and filling two glasses. Sitting them on the large rim of the tub, he tapped on Addison's shoulder. "Scoot forward for me."

Addison allowed him enough room to slip in behind her, sighing again as he pulled her back to rest against his chest. Handing her one of the glasses over her shoulder, he leaned down to kiss her neck.

"This is so relaxing… Thank you..."

"You're welcome," he let out a soft laugh, his gravelly voice vibrating her back as he spoke, "but I wouldn't call this relaxing"

"Why's that?"

"Because feeling your silky wet skin slide against me like this is torture when I'm trying to let your body recoup."

"Well, you're the one who climbed in here."

"What can I say, I'm a masochist…But… it's the best kind of torture..." he whispered against her wet shoulder. "And it is relaxing. I just need to shift my focus a little… which is hard to do when you wiggle your ass like that."

"Sorry," she said with a soft smile.

"No you're not," he teased. He grabbed his own glass and raised it out in front of her. "Now let's have a toast, shall we?"

"A bathtub toast?"

"Of course! Bathtub toasts are the most sincere, didn't you know that?"

"No… can't say I did… And since when do you willingly drink tequila?"

"It seemed appropriate."

She smiled and leaned into him further. "What are we toasting too?"

"Life… death..." he kissed the top of her head. "The boundaries between life and death are at best shadowy and vague. Who shall say where one ends and where the other begins?"

"Edgar Allan Poe…" she smiled and looked back towards him. "Always a favorite of mine..."

"I know. You're the only person I've ever known who reads it for the love notes."

She leaned further into him. "Memento Mori, Memento Vivere..."

"Remember you will die… remember you must live..." He leaned down and kissed her before clinking his glass lightly to hers. After sipping quietly for a moment, Zed could see that her eyes were starting to droop again. "Okay, give me that." He took her glass before she could drop it, then sat up a little higher in the tub and reached for the sponge. "Let's get you cleaned up before you pass out on me."

He dipped the sponge down into the bubble bath, bringing it up to squeeze the warm suds over Addison's shoulders, watching them cover her porcelain skin.

"I know you've suffered  
But I don't want you to hide..." he whispered into her ear.  
"It's cold and loveless  
I won't let you be denied..."

"Mmm… I didn't think this bath could get any better," she giggled.

"Soothing  
I'll make you feel pure  
Trust me  
You can be sure

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart  
I want to recognize your beauty is not just a mask  
I want to exorcise the demons from your past  
I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart..." he kissed her shoulder softly before grabbing onto her waist and turning her around, making the water splash out of the tub. She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck as he pulled her in for a kiss.

"You trick your lovers  
That you're wicked and divine..." he breathed against her lips.

"You may be a sinner  
But your innocence is mine

Please me  
Show me how it's done  
Tease me  
You are the one..."

She kissed him again, silencing him. "I think I've rested up enough… please tell me you have another condom somewhere."

He laughed and leaned over the tub, grabbing a condom from the pocket of the robe he had been wearing. "I'm always prepared..."

She arched her brow. "Except when you're not…" she mumbled under her breath.

"What was that?"

She smiled and shook her head. "Nothing..." she grabbed the foil packet from him and ripped it open with her teeth.

.

* * *

Zed blew out the candles and drained the remaining water that hadn't sloshed out of the tub, before joining Addison in the bedroom. He slid into bed next to her, only to find that she was already fast asleep.

Pulling her to him in the dark, he wrapped his arms around her possessively and kissed the top of her head.

"We burn and we played, we try to forget  
But the memories left are still haunting…

She stirred and rolled over in his arms, clinging to him as though he were her lifeline.

"The face of an angel, the heart of a ghost  
Was it a dream?

I, I am a man on fire  
You, a violent desire

What a dangerous night to fall in love  
Don't know why we still hide what we've become

Do you wanna cross the line?  
We're runnin' out of time  
A dangerous night to fall in love..."

He kissed her lips softly and held her close as he reluctantly gave in to sleep.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****Happy Thanksgiving everyone!**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**-Dark Side, Bishop Brigs**

**-Undisclosed Desires, Muse**

**-Dangerous Night, Thirty Seconds to Mars**


	22. Blood In The Cut

**CHAPTER 22**

**BLOOD IN THE CUT**

Addison woke up with the soft light of the sun shining directly into her face through the small gap in the curtains. She blocked the beam out with her hand and looked to her side expecting to find Zed. Instead, she was met with a piece of paper on his pillow. Fearing the worst, she picked up the note that he had scrawled on the hotel stationery.

_She is shades of Dracula on a full moon night. She is Autumn breezes and blackbirds in flight. She is the sweet kiss of the belladonna, poisonous and deadly. She is Annabel Lee drowning in her love for Edgar Allan Poe. She is falling stars and wishes that beg to come true. She is a midnight song that echoes in the dark._

…_.._

_Went to the cafe downstairs to grab some breakfast. Be back soon._

_-Z_

She clutched the note to her chest and smiled. Wrapping the bedsheet around herself, she wandered over to the floor to ceiling window. She opened the curtains and rested her head on the cold glass as she watched the snow falling peacefully over the trees below, hoping to find some clarity to calm the chaotic feelings coursing through her. Yesterday should have been one of the hardest days of the year for her to deal with, but with Zed next to her… she shook her head and smiled… he made everything better. Why was she fighting her feelings for him? She knew the answer deep down, but still… she couldn't help that her heart was screaming to be with him. Being with him was as easy as breathing, she didn't need to think about it, it just came naturally. Could she forgive him for his past transgressions? Could she trust him once again? She closed her eyes and let out a sigh.

"There's a silence, in the woods after it snows

That's the vibe now, of the piece inside my soul

Like a spider, there's a web that you have wove

There's a heart now, where there used to be a ghost...

And ooh, yeah it's making me uneasy

Now I hear sounds in the hallway

Rocking chairs are moving on their own

I'm falling for you

So much so that it's freaking me out

So much so that it's freaking me out

So much so that it's freaking me…"

Her phone buzzed on the nightstand, pulling her from the internal tug of war she was trying to process. She walked over and picked it up, reading the text from Bucky.

_B: What time are you heading back today?_

She quickly typed out a reply as she walked back over to the window.

A_: Don't know yet. What time do we need to get on the road?_

_B: Preferably around noon, but I doubt I can round everyone up by then. Stacey is sick, she stayed at the Motel down the street last night, and I have no idea where Zed is. _

_A: Is Stacey, ok?_

_B: Yeah, funny timing since I told everyone you had a 24 hr bug. _

She looked up from her phone when she heard the front door open.

_A: I'll see you this afternoon. _

"It's snowing!" Zed said as he walked into the bedroom.

She looked over to him and smiled. "It is…" she whispered as he wrapped his arms around her from behind. She pulled his face down to hers and kissed him softly. "I thought you left me… But then I found your letter… It was beautiful, thank you."

He kissed her back, whispering against her lips, "What can I say, you've always been my Pattie Boyd."

She giggled into their kiss before she turned around in his arms. "Bucky's looking for you."

"Not where I thought this was going, but okay..."

"Sorry, I just got a text from him."

He stole a quick kiss and tightened his arms around her. "Speaking of texts… Would it be so bold of me to ask for your number?"

She smiled and rolled her eyes as she handed him her phone. "Oh, I guess… Go ahead and call yours, that way I have your number, too."

The smile on his face spread as he took her phone and punched in his own number. "Aww, you want my number, Addie?"

"Shut up, Zed," she laughed as his phone began to ring.

He dismissed the call and handed her her phone back. "There. All done," he sighed in relief.

"Feel better?"

"Much. I kind of panicked the other night when you didn't show up and I had no way of getting in touch with you. Thank god I overheard Bucky."

She rolled her eyes and kissed him again. "So, what's for breakfast?"

He lifted her up and carried her into the sitting room. "Coffee and croissants."

"Mmm…" she whispered as she guided his face back towards her for another kiss. "Please tell me you billed it to the room."

"Yeah, not a chance. You're already paying for the hotel and the room service yesterday, the least I could do was buy us breakfast."

She rolled her eyes as they sat down on the couch. "You're forgetting something."

"What's that?" he asked as he handed her a croissant out of the bag.

"Addison Donnelly is paying the hotel bill. Not Casey Jacobs or Meg Jacobs. Addison Donnelly can more than cover it."

"I fail to see the difference, Gorgeous."

"Addison Donnelly has an AMEX black card. All my other aliases live off a debit card."

"You still have your AMEX?" he asked with his mouth full.

"Yupp… backed by the Donnelly fortune."

He sighed and set his croissant down. "I know we have this fun little charade going on where we don't really discuss the past and all..."

"And I'd like to keep it that way," she said as she sipped her coffee.

"Can you answer me one thing? Especially in light of why we're currently in this hotel?"

"Sure."

"And please, don't think I'm asking this for selfish reasons… I'm assuming your stance on using your last name and position to get ahead in the music industry remains as strong as ever… Which I totally understand and respect..."

"You'd be correct."

He nodded his head while he tried to phrase his question the right way. "If your Dad is no longer with us, who has control of said Donnelly fortune and Bamm!?"

She swallowed the bite of croissant she had been chewing and took another sip of coffee. "It's a bit complicated..." she set the cup down on the table and pulled her knees up to her chest. She was about to take a huge risk, especially since he'd admitted to using her for her family's influence in the past. But there was something in his eyes that made her want to tell him the truth. "Everything was left to me."

"Woah..."

"Yeah..." she whispered, hugging her knees. "But, I didn't handle his death too well… so, my mother sued to get full control… I'm talking EVERYTHING. The houses, the money, BAMM!, you name it… If my step-brother hadn't signed a conservatorship, I would have lost it all... So, although everything is technically mine, I don't have full control until I'm twenty-five… Not like I really want it anyway, but still..."

"Woah..."

"Yeah…" she picked up her coffee and took another sip. "So… now you know… and now I'd like to go back to never talking about it, k?" She stood up and started to walk off.

"Where are you going?"

She stopped and closed her eyes, taking a breath to calm herself. She turned around and gave him a sultry smile. "Shower… Why don't you join me so I can thank you for taking such good care of me..."

* * *

"Uber should be downstairs in about five minutes," Zed said as he wrapped his arms around her. "I know we should probably head back towards the bus separately… but I'm way too selfish to give up spending time with you." He leaned down and kissed her softly.

She moaned into his mouth, wrapping her arms around his neck. "You'd think after having you so many times the last two days, I would have had enough of you..."

"I could never have enough of you…" he whispered against her lips before pulling her bottom lip between his teeth.

"I don't want to go back to reality yet..."

He smiled as she started to trail kisses along his jaw. "I was rather enjoying our bubble, too."

"You know we need to stop doing this."

"We've got at least four minutes..."

She giggled and gently pushed him away. "I didn't mean this right now."

He pulled her back to him and picked her up, turning them around so he could pin her against the wall. "Then what did you mean, baby?"

His mouth was trailing hot kisses down her neck, making it very difficult for her to remember what she was trying to say. "Tour… Lacey…"

He growled deep in his chest, sending the best kind of shivers over her body.

"Fucking Lacey… don't remind me."

Addison smiled and pulled his face up to hers. "We need to stop the illicit trysts or at the very least be more careful. I don't want to risk this tour for everyone because we can't seem to keep our hands off of each other."

"Is this the part where you tell me we're 'just friends'?" he asked quietly.

She leaned in closer and kissed him. "No…" She could feel his answering smile against her lips.

* * *

"Hey everyone! Look who I just ran into!" Zed boomed as he opened the door to the bus.

"Princess!" Tracey exclaimed as he ran across the front room, almost tackling her back out of the door as he hugged her. "Oh, I missed you! Are you feeling better?"

She squeezed him back in a tight hug and gave him a questioning look before Zed added, "Yeah, I meant to tell you in the parking lot… You look to be doing much better after that 24-hour stomach flu."

"OH! Yeah, I feel worlds better," she said with a smile before mouthing a silent 'thank you' over to Zed.

"Yeah, well Stacey went to urgent care yesterday afternoon," Lacey said as she walked into the front room spraying a can of Lysol. "She woke up puking yesterday… She's still sick today. Thanks for spreading whatever it is you had."

"Oh, no… poor Stacey," Addison said walking past Lacey and sitting next to Eliza.

Eliza gave her a quick hug, whispering "Are you okay?" into her ear.

Addison nodded and gave her a small smile.

Zed tiptoed over to where Bonzo was napping in one of the captain's chairs and licked his finger before sticking it into his friend's ear.

Bonzo shot straight up, "Dude! The fuck?!"

Zed was practically on the floor laughing when Bucky walked in. "Can you keep it down? Stacey is sleeping."

"Sorry, boss."

Bucky rolled his eyes and muttered something that sounded like "children" under his breath. He turned towards Addison. "Glad your back and feeling better, can I have a word?!"

She nodded her head and followed him to the back kitchen.

The second they crossed the doorway he held his cellphone out for her to see. "How the hell did you rack up that large of a bill that quickly?!"

"Good to see you too..."

He closed his eyes and clenched his teeth.

"B, if I don't have the money in my personal account, just take it out of my trust when you take out the money for the missed show."

"Not the point!"

"Than what is the point?"

"You can't just go around charging this much to your AMEX!"

"It's an AMEX Black Card, B… It's meant for large insane purchases."

He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I know you CAN afford it… It's just..."

"It's just what?" she snapped back. "How often do I touch that card or my trust? Huh?" she walked closer to him and lowered her voice even lower. "At most twice a year, Bucky. That's it. Every other day I live off of what I earn, I scrimp, I save, and I don't spend more than what I make. So forgive the hell out of me for splurging!"

"You're right… I'm sorry. I'll transfer the money for your trust to cover it."

"Thank you. And if you could also pay ME out of MY trust for the missed show, that would be appreciated. My brother tends to flip the fuck out if I'm late on a car payment."

"I can't wait until you turn Twenty-five and all this shit becomes your problem."

"You didn't have to sign the goddamn papers, you know."

"Well, you didn't leave me much of a fucking choice! You went AWOL! If I hadn't signed a conservatorship, your bitch of a mother would have full control of EVERYTHING! It's bad enough she has your seat on the board, plus her own! I couldn't sit back and watch her take everything."

Addison placed a gentle hand on his shoulder and offered him a small smile. "I know… I'm sorry I give you a hard time about it, sometimes."

He sighed and held her hand. "Thanks… Sorry, I'm in a bad mood. I've been on the phone since last night trying to get some things lined up, and your hotel bill popped up at the exact wrong time… I know you have more money than you'll ever be able to actually spend, I'm just used to your biggest purchases being in the hundreds, not the thousands. I'm sorry I bitched you out. And thank you for covering everyone's cut for the missed show."

"Literally the least I could do."

"I just hope we don't have to miss another show because of Stacey."

She hugged him close. "It'll all work out, B."

He chuckled and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "You seem strangely happy today…"

She shrugged as she pulled back and smiled.

"Are you… Is that an actual smile?"

She rolled her eyes and let out a soft giggle. "Shut up, Bucky."

They both turned towards the doorway when the familiar sounds of Stairway to Heaven started to play from the front of the bus.

.

* * *

Zed was sitting in the captain's chair opposite Bonzo strumming his guitar.

"There's a lady who's sure

All that glitters is gold

And she's buying a stairway to heaven..."

Lacey rolled her eyes. "You are not really attempting Zeppelin, are you?"

Zed flipped her off and continued.

"When she gets there she knows

If the stores are all closed

With a word she can get what she came for..."

She let out an aggravated sigh. "Whatevs… we've got nothing else to do for the next few hours."

"There's a sign on the wall

But she wants to be sure

'Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings

In a tree by the brook

There's a songbird who sings

Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiving..."

Lacey flipped her long blonde ponytail, "Robert Plant you are not..."

Zed continued to ignore her and sing as Eliza stood up and walked over to Lacey.

"I'm tired of you trying to pick a fight and fuck up this tour. So unless you want me to beat out a 4/4 count on you, I'd suggest you just shut your mouth for once..." she whispered too low for anyone else to hear. She smiled when she heard Lacey swallow loudly and nod her head. "Glad we have an understanding." She picked up her drumsticks and plugged in her electric practice pad to join in on the song.

"Well if we're going all out..." Bonzo said as he reached over and grabbed his bass.

"If there's a bustle in your hedgerow

Don't be alarmed now

It's just a spring for the May queen

Yes, there are two paths you can go by

But in the long run

There's still time to change the road you're on

And it makes me wonder..."

The three of them were lost in the music until the sound of another guitar cut in. They looked up to see Tracey plugged in and joining in on the melody. Zed nodded his head, "You take the next verse, Trace..."

Tracey smiled.

"Your head is humming and it won't go

In case you don't know

The piper's calling you to join him..." he glanced over to see Bucky and Addison standing in the doorway.

"Princess, grab your ax… you know you want to..." Zed called out as he continued to strum.

Addison disappeared for a brief moment before returning with her cherry-red Les Paul electric. She plugged it in just in time to take over for Jimmy Page's legendary solo.

Everyone on the bus stopped what they were doing as they watched her play. Zed's jaw dropped. He had almost forgotten just how sexy she looked when she gave herself completely over to the music. Yes, he'd seen her play the bass on stage every night since she'd join the tour, but it had nothing on her on guitar. She was lust personified as her fingers danced across the frets. He let out the breath he hadn't realized he was holding and stood up, picking up the melody once more. The other three soon followed. Their sounds blending into audio magic. The melodies washing over all of them and bringing them together.

Addison opened her eyes, unaware that she had even closed them, to find herself face to face with Zed. The necks of their guitars almost touching, their strings only inches apart.

He met her eyes and nodded, encouraging her to take the final, and most difficult to sing verse.

She smiled and bit her lip before she started to sing.

"And as we wind on down the road

Our shadows taller than our soul

There walks a lady we all know..."

"Holy shit..." Eliza whispered.

"Who shines white light and want to show

How everything still turns to gold

And if you listen very hard

The tune will come to you at last

When all are one and one is all

To be a rock and not to roll…."

They all jammed the final chords with Zed finishing.

"And she's buying the stairway to heaven…."

They all stood there breathless as they looked around at one another, barely noticing that Lacey had stormed out the room.

Bucky was the first to break the silence. "That was…" he was at a loss for words, opting to clap instead.

They all started to laugh.

"Oh my god, Princess!" Eliza gushed as she stood up and walked over to Addison. "Holy hell! You've got pipes AND you can fucking shred?! Jesus, girl… you just put Jimmy Page AND Robert Plant to shame!"

Addison nearly blushed as she brushed off Eliza's comments. "Hardly..." she said softly, still smiling from ear to ear. She couldn't remember the last time she had felt like this. Music had always been her everything, but playing with the four of them had been a whole new experience.

"She's totally right!" Tracey beamed from next to her. "I haven't had that much fun jamming in AGES!"

"Agreed," Bonzo nodded. "Man… that was like that scene in Almost Famous when they all sing Tiny Dancer… oh, and Kate Hudson as a groupie in that movie… I swear that inspired me to become a musician…"

"Dude..." Zed laughed as they exchanged high-fives. "Penny Lane..."

Addison's smile fell instantly. Hearing that name fall from his lips was more than she could handle. She turned around and made a run for her bunk, not wanting to cry in front of everyone.

"Shit..." Bucky muttered under his breath as he followed after her. He grabbed her arm as she started to climb to her bunk and pulled her into a hug.

"Bucky… stop..." she whispered.

"No."

"I'll be fine… You don't need everyone else asking why you're hugging me like this."

"I don't care about anyone else."

She pulled back and arched her brow.

"Fine… I care a little… But I care about you more."

She wiped her eyes and plastered a fake smile on her face. "I'm fine… see."

"I don't believe you for a second, but I'll drop it for now. If you need me, I'm here."

She nodded her head and dropped the smile. "Thanks, B… I'm just going to..." she motioned up towards her bunk.

He nodded his head and walked back towards the front of the bus.

No sooner had she closed the curtain of her bunk did her cell phone start to vibrate. She looked at the bright screen in the dark and opened the message from Zed.

_Z: You okay?_

She sighed and closed her eyes. Bree was right, he needed to know. She opened her eyes and typed back a response.

_A: I'll be fine after a nap. Just a lot of emotions catching up to me. We need to talk later tonight. _

_Z: I'll come get you when everyone else crashes_

_A: Thanks. See you then. _

_Z: Sweet dreams, beautiful _

She smiled sadly at the screen for a moment, letting his last message wash over her, before swiping through her apps and pulling up her secured folder. She punched in her code and went to the images file. There were only three pictures saved there. The first was of her holding her daughter for the first and only time. She could still remember the feel of her soft skin as she held her close. The second picture was one of her father hugging her as he looked down at her and his granddaughter. And finally her favorite picture- A close up of Penny's peaceful face. She traced her daughter's features as tears fell from her eyes. She was perfect. She had Zed's chin and her nose… a perfect mix of the two of them.

She ran her hand across the words tattooed over the scar on her abdomen. "We loved with a love that was more than love..." she whispered to herself. She closed her eyes as her tears picked up, eventually falling into a restless sleep.

.

* * *

Addison awoke when the calming motion of the bus came to a stop. She cracked open an eye and looked at her cell. It was well after midnight, they must be at their next stop. She let out a yawn and stretched as much as the small bunk would allow. As she picked up her phone to send Zed a text, she heard giggling coming from the hall.

"Sh… We don't want anyone else waking up..."

She sat up as she recognized Zed's voice.

"Take me right here… I can't wait any longer..."

She gasped and clamped her hand over her mouth.

"Did you hear that?" Lacey whispered.

"I didn't hear anything… but we can't risk it..."

Addison's heart was hammering in her ears. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. Her stomach began to roll.

"Tomorrow after the show then..." Lacey whispered in a breathy voice.

Addison's hands were shaking, she was going to be sick. She threw open her bunk curtain and jumped down, not bothering to spare either of them a glance as she ran towards the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

After emptying the contents of her stomach, she rinsed her mouth and slid down against the door onto the floor. She brought her knees up and hugged them. How could she have been so stupid again? How could she have not seen that he was using her again? She closed her eyes and let out a shaky breath.

"The boy I love's got another girl

He might be fucking her right now…" she whispered to herself as she gently rocked back and forth.

"Thought if I was smart I'd make it far

But I'm still at the start…"

Her head was all over the place as she replayed every interaction they had had in the last few months, desperately searching for what she could have missed this time. Just like the last time he had broken her heart, she couldn't find anything.

"I don't have an agenda

All I do is pretend to be ok so my friends

Can't see my heart in a blender…"

She needed the ache in her heart to go away. She stood up and grabbed her bathroom bag off the shelf.

"Take my head and kick it in

Break some bread for all my sins

Say a word, do it soon

It's too quiet in this room..."

She dumped out the contents into the sink and picked up her razor. She held it at an angle against the edge of the sink and pushed down until the plastic surrounding the blade broke.

"I need noise

I need the buzz of a sub

Need the crack of a whip

Need some blood in the cut…"

Very carefully she took the exposed blade and pressed it into her wrist. She flinched as it cut into her skin.

"I need noise

I need the buzz of a sub

Need the crack of a whip

Need some blood in the cut…"

She dragged the razor along the old raised scar, relishing the physical pain as it replaced the emotional.

"I need blood in the cut

I need blood in the cut..."

She silently watched as the bright red blood covered the music staff tattooed across her wrist. It wasn't a deep cut- she'd certainly gone deeper in the past, but it served its purpose- calming her as the pain washed over her making her numb to everything once again.

A light knock on the door pulled her attention away.

"I'll be right out..." she said calmly. She carefully repacked her toiletries back into their case and placed it on the shelf. She pulled her sleeve back down and opened the door.

* * *

As the bus slowed to get exit the interstate, Zed looked over to Bonzo. "Shouldn't you be making your nightly Face-time call to Bree about now?"

Bonzo shrugged. "I told her to text me when she was finally home. I haven't heard back yet."

Zed ran his hands over his eyes and glanced down at his watch.

"Dude… if you want me to head to bed so you can spend some 'alone time' with someone, just say so."

He let out a soft chuckle. "In that case, can you kindly go the fuck to bed?"

"I gotcha man, have fun," Bonzo laughed as he stood up and stretched. "Just try to keep it down."

Zed threw one of the throw pillows from the couch at him, narrowly missing his head. "Tell Bree I said 'Hi'."

"Will do… night."

He rested his head against the back of the bench seat and let out a sigh of relief. He'd been worried about Addison since she had run off. All he had wanted to do all evening was curl around her in her bunk and hold her, so naturally, everyone decided to sit around and watch a marathon session of The Office. He was reaching for his phone on the table just as a soft voice whispered. "I thought he'd never leave..."

Zed looked up to see Lacey walking towards him. He quickly stood up. "Lacey… what are you doing up..."

"Waiting for a chance to get you alone… sounds like great minds think alike."

"I was just heading to bed," he said as he tried to move past her.

She grabbed onto the hem of his shirt and slowly started to push it up. "I knew you still wanted me… I heard you with Bonzo… Who else would you want alone time with?"

Zed tried to act as calm as he possibly could while his mind was spinning in a panic trying to find a way out of this situation. If he turned her down flat, she'd throw a fit and wake everyone up, she'd also start asking more questions. He flashed her a cocky smirk and slowly started to walk her backward into the hallway. "… but Bonzo's still awake."

"So… he's your best friend. Like he'd say anything," she whispered as she took his shirt up over his head and threw it behind her.

"Sh… We don't want anyone else waking up..."

Lacey wrapped her arms around his neck, trying to pull him in closer. "Take me right here… I can't wait any longer..." she suddenly pulled back. "Did you hear that?"

Zed sent up a silent thank you to whatever it was that Lacey thought she had heard. He needed to get rid of her and fast. "I didn't hear anything… but we can't risk it..."

"Tomorrow after the show then..." she whispered in a breathy voice. He tried to keep the bile from rising in his throat at the thought, but at least it bought him a little more time.

Both of their heads snapped to the side when they heard a bunk curtain open. Addison didn't even spare them a glance as she jumped down and ran towards the bathroom.

"Fuck..." Zed cursed as he heard the bathroom door slam shut.

Lacey giggled and ran her fingers through his hair. "Oops…"

He was furious. He grabbed her wrists tightly and brought her hands down. Everything in him screamed for him to tell her off and come clean about Addison, but he knew he couldn't. Instead, he loosened his grip and closed his eyes, trying to calm his temper. "Lacey..." he said quietly as he opened them back up. "Goodnight."

She smiled up to him, "Until tomorrow..." she threw him a wink and licked her lips as she crawled into her own bunk.

Zed ran his hands through his hair in frustration. He couldn't go directly to the bathroom to check on Addison or Lacey would know something was up. He hated that they had to hide, now more so than ever. He walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of Jack from the cabinet. He sat down on the counter and took a large swig. God only knows what Addison had overheard. He glanced down at his watch trying to estimate how much time could safely pass before he could check on her. He took another swig, his leg bouncing in double-time. After fifteen minutes, he couldn't take it anymore. "Fuck it..." he whispered to himself as he capped the bottle and jumped off the counter.

He stood outside the bathroom door and knocked softly.

"I'll be right out," Addison said softly from the other side.

He waited patiently for her to open. It was only a minute or two, but it felt like an eternity. When she finally opened the door he breathed a sigh of relief. "Adds..."

Her eyes snapped up to meet his. Her demeanor changing instantly from a quiet calm to a storming rage as she pushed past him.

He silently followed her as she walked through the bus and out the door. The moment they stepped into the cold snowy night he grabbed her shoulder. "Adds..."

"Do. Not. Touch. Me." she growled as she stared daggers into his eyes. She turned back around and kept walking.

"It's not what you think."

She could feel her face heating up. "Wow… for someone who claims to hate Lacey with every shred of his being, you sure have a funny way of showing it, Z." Her knees were shaking both from the cold and from the adrenaline pumping through her veins. "I can't believe I fell for the act again."

"Fell for the act again? What the fuck are you talking about?" He shook his head in frustration. "Adds, she cornered me. I was waiting for everyone to fall asleep so I could come get you so we could talk. Lacey practically tried to rip off my clothes when Bonzo finally went to bed!"

"Bullshit."

"It's the truth!"

"I heard you! Outside my bunk!"

"Then you heard me trying to fend her off! I was trying to get her away from me without causing a huge scene and waking everyone else up! I was trying to protect us!"

She rolled her eyes and stared up to the sky. "Don't even try that shit, Zed."

"Addison, baby, listen to me!"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!"

Zed's hair ran through his hair in frustration. "Please hear me out..."

"Why? So I can let my guard down and you can use me again?"

"What? I never..."

"Don't…" she cut him off. "I'm sick of the fucking lies, I knew I couldn't trust you..."

"I just got you back. Please don't let that psycho bitch come between us. Please." He grabbed her wrist to keep her from walking off.

She cringed the second his hand made contact. He glanced down and noticed blood dripping down her hand.

"The fuck..." He pulled her closer and pushed the sleeve of her sweatshirt up. "Jesus, Adds… your bleeding." He looked at the thin cut closer and inhaled sharply as he looked up into her eyes. "Did you cut yourself?"

She pulled her arm away and covered it back up. "Why the fuck do you care?"

"You cut yourself?! Are you fucking insane?! "Jesus Christ…" He pulled her back into him, crushing her into his chest with a protective hug. "You could have seriously hurt yourself!"

She struggled against him, pushing her hands against his chest enough to be able to look him in the eyes. "Again, Z! Why do you even fucking care!?" Her voice was raw with emotion.

"Because I fucking love you! That's why!"

She pulled free from his embrace. "This was all a fucking mistake… I'm done with this tour, and I'm sure as hell done with you!" She turned on her heels and ran back towards the bus.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Sorry for the emotional whiplash! **

**In case you missed it, I'm also writing a short Holiday Story! Go check it out!**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**Freaking Me Out- Ava Max**

**Stairway To Heaven- Led Zeppelin**

**Blood In The Cut- **


	23. Irresistible

**Chapter 23**

**IRRESISTIBLE**

"B, we need to fucking talk," Addison said as she stormed into the kitchen early the next morning fully dressed, heading straight towards the liquor cabinet.

"I was thinking the same thing," Bucky responded as he set his phone down and gave her a serious look.

She rolled her eyes and uncapped the bottle of tequila. "What are you going to bitch me out for this morning?" she mumbled as she brought the bottle to her lips and started to chug.

"Jesus, take it easy on that stuff. You're going to pass out drunk before ten at that rate."

She wiped her mouth on the sleeve of her sweater. "I'm counting on it..."

Bucky stood up and walked over to her, taking the bottle away with one hand and grabbing her arm with the other.

"Ouch… Let go..." she protested as he pushed her sleeve up.

He looked down at her scabbed over wrist and closed his eyes as he bit the inside of his cheek. He very slowly counted backward from ten before he opened his eyes again. "I know the last few days have been hard… but I thought you were finished with this shit?"

"How did you..."

"It wasn't hard to figure out. The pool of dried blood in the bathroom combined with your broken razor in the trash..." he let out a sigh. "Adds..."

"Bucky… I can't stay on this tour."

His eyes snapped up to meet hers. "What?"

"I'm done. I can't do this anymore," she said in a whisper, trying to keep the tears at bay.

"Please don't do this to me… Not now."

She gave him a questioning look.

"I was planning on telling everyone once it was final, but I just negotiated an extension to the tour."

"You did what?"

"No more college towns after January. I'm talking major markets, bigger venues..."

"Fuck me sideways on a Sunday..."

"Ew… No thanks."

She rolled her eyes and took the tequila back from him, taking another swig.

"I need you, sis… please. This is huge. I can't do this without you, but more importantly… I don't want to do this without you."

She was silent for a moment before she nodded. "Fine."

He let out a sigh of relief and hugged her. "Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah..."

He pulled back and looked at her with a serious expression again. "As far as..." he glanced down at her wrist. "Don't pull that shit again. If you're hurting that much and need an escape, come get me. You know I'm here for you. You don't have to deal with everything alone. I thought we had an agreement after the accident."

She nodded her head and hugged him again. "I'm sorry, B..."

"It's okay," he whispered as he kissed the top of her head. "I love you, Addie-loo. You're not alone anymore."

She breathed in a sniffle and wiped at her eyes. "Okay, enough of the mushy sibling shit. I can only take so much."

He let out a soft laugh and nodded. "You gonna be okay?"

She shrugged her shoulders and plastered a fake smile across her face. "I always am."

Bucky rolled his eyes. "All right, I'm going to grab breakfast with E down the street. Can you behave?"

"I always do."

"Riiiiight…." He kissed her cheek and turned around, heading towards the exit.

Addison took another large swig of tequila and held the bottle out to see how much was left. "Quarter of a bottle..." she whispered to herself as she shrugged. "Bottoms up..." she tipped the bottle back once more and chugged.

.

* * *

Everyone was still asleep as she made her way clumsily down the hall towards the front of the bus. She fell onto the bench seat with a giggle and picked up her cherry red Les Paul that was still sitting there from the day before. She plugged it into the portable amp and turned it up as far as it would go. She laid down and started to strum out an angry chord progression.  
"I'm no Barbie doll  
I'm not your baby girl  
So I've done ugly things and I have made mistakes  
I am rotten to my core if they're to be believed  
So what if I'm no baby bird hanging upon your every word  
Nothing ever smells of roses that rises out of mud..."

"What the..." Bonzo said groggily as he walked in with Zed following right behind.

"Why do you love me  
Why do you love me  
Why do you love me it's driving me crazy  
Why do you love me  
Why do you love me  
Why do you love me it's driving me crazy..."

Zed scrubbed at his face with his hands and let out a loud sigh. "You wanna maybe turn the amp down, Princess?"

She stood up on the bench seat and continued to play as she stared daggers into him.

"You're not some baby boy  
Why you acting so surprised  
You're sick of all the rules  
Well, I'm sick of all your lies..."

"I'll take that as a no..." he said, sitting down in one of the captain's chairs and motioning for her to continue.

"Now I've held back a wealth of shit I think I'm gonna choke  
I'm standing in the shadows with the words stuck in my throat  
Does it really come as a surprise when I tell you I don't feel good  
That nothing ever came from nothing man  
Oh, man ain't that the truth..."

Bonzo turned to Zed. "What the hell happened?"

Zed shook his head and threw his hands up.

"Why do you love me  
Why do you love me  
Why do you love me it's driving me crazy  
Why do you love me  
Why do you love me  
Why do you love me it's driving me crazy..."

"What is with the wake-up call Dollface?" Tracey called out over the music as he walked into the room yawning.

"I get back up and I do it again  
I get back up and I do it again  
I get back up and I do it again  
I get back up and I do it, I do it again..."

"Jesus, Casey. If you wanted to work on a new song, couldn't you at least wait until everyone was fucking awake?" Lacey snapped as she walked into the room.

Addison stopped the riff abruptly and sat down. She started to pluck strings individually as she looked at her.

"I think you're sleeping with a friend of mine  
I have no proof but I think that I'm right..."

She strummed out another angry chord and glared back at Zed.

"And you've still got the most beautiful face  
It just makes me sad most of the time..."

She stood back up and started to strum again.

"Okay… I've heard enough..." Bonzo said as he walked over and unplugged her guitar. He flung her over his shoulder and carried her kicking and yelling off the bus. He walked her over to the brick wall behind the bus, blocking them from sight. He put her down on her feet. "What the hell is going on?"

"Why don't you ask Zed?" Addison sneered as she straightened her sweater.

"Oh, trust me… I'm going to. But he's not the one that just woke up almost the entire bus. I thought you were trying to be discreet?"

"I AM!"

"You basically just told Lacey that you and Z are together!" he whisper yelled between clenched teeth.

"Well, we're not! But, from what I understand, they are!"

"Wait… What?"

She nodded her head and smiled. "They fucking deserve each other." She pushed past him and walked back towards the bus, leaving him there in shock.

As she stumbled back towards the front door, Tracey walked out. "Woah…." he said as he caught her mid stumble. "What the hell is going on with you this morning?"

She hiccuped and shook her head. "Nothing at all! Everything is fine! I'm fine!"

"You are a whole hell of a long way from fine..." He pulled out his phone and searched the local map. "Come on… We're getting you some coffee and enough food to absorb however much you had to drink to get to this state."

* * *

"Feeling better?" Tracey asked tentatively as he watched Addison pop the last bite of her pancakes into her mouth.

She shrugged.

"So… spill the deets honey-bunny."

"On?"

"On what the hell drove you to get sloshed before noon?"

She took a deep breath and wiped her mouth on her napkin. "My ex."

Tracey's brows shot up. He signaled for the waitress. "I know the beginning of a juicy story when I hear it… We're going to need more coffee."

Addison smiled. "I'm trusting you with this Tracey. Just like I trusted you with my real name… This does not leave this table."

He pretended to lock his lips and throw away the imaginary key.

"So… I wasn't sick the other day."

"You weren't?"

She shook her head. "No… It was the anniversary of my father's death."

"Oh. MY. GOD! Addison!" He stood up and ran over to the other side of the table and threw his arms around her. "Why didn't you tell me! I would have been there for you! You shouldn't have been alone!"

"I wasn't alone..."

He pulled back and looked at her. "Is this where the ex comes in? Did you set up a secret rendezvous?"

She shook her head. "No, he just found me at the hotel I ran off to, and..."

"How?"

"Black magic?" she offered sarcastically. "But seriously… It's because he can be amazing and wonderful and know exactly what I need when I don't even know myself..." she whined as she dropped her head onto the table.

"So he just showed up in Cleveland?"

"Yup. He showed up at the Ritz and loved me up and took care of me until I needed to come back."

"Wow… Circumstances sucked, but damn… I wanna be loved up in a Ritz Carlton!"

"It was perfect..." she sighed sadly.

"I can only imagine the sheer physical perfection of a man that can land you..." he said wistfully.

Addison gave him a small smile. "Trust me… he's gorgeous… he knows it too. Ugh, and don't even get me started on the sex. Seriously, he's the only man I have ever known that can keep up with me and then some."

"So if he's so wonderful and amazing, why is he an ex?"

"Because he knocked me up, cheated on me, and used me for my family's influence."

"Okay, we're going to need more than coffee for this story… This calls for retail therapy."

* * *

"So, he never knew about the baby?" Tracey asked as he tried on a pair of Moschino pumps.

Addison shook her head. "No. By the time I got out of that godforsaken hell hole his number was no longer in service. And then a few weeks later I received the letter. When I finally saw him again..." she sighed, "It had been so long and I just didn't trust him enough to tell him."

"Makes sense to me. Lying, cheating, jerk… What do you think

of these? He asked holding his foot out.

"I have those in red, they'll cut the back of your heel to shreds within thirty minutes."

Tracey cringed and slipped the shoes off of his feet before he scooched closer to her and pulled her into a hug. "Oh, Addie-Caddie… I'm so sorry."

"I'm fine, Tracey."

He looked up at her and arched his brow.

"Fine. I'm not fine. But I will be… I just need to put him back out of my mind. I survived for years without him. I'll make it through this."

"Well, I don't know if it helps, but there is a serious hottie that has been checking you out for like the last ten minutes," Tracey said in a hushed whisper.

Addison rolled her eyes and looked around. "Where?"

"Sandy blonde over there pretending to rifle through the Michael Kors puffer coats, flanked by the obvious Frat bros."

She turned around and looked, instantly making eye-contact with the man Tracey had been talking about. "He looks familiar..." She smiled and waved him over.

"I'm sorry… I know I was staring," he apologized as he walked up to them. "It's just...and I know this is going to sound completely out of left field, but… would you have previously been a blonde who happened to be in Los Angeles back in August?"

Addison let out a soft laugh. "Yes, I live in LA… how did you..."

"Meg?"

Addison's eyes went wide as sudden recognition crossed her mind. "Tim? No…that's not it... Tom?"

He shook his head and smiled politely. "No, but close."

"I'm sorry, I'm terrible with names..."

"That might be because you spent all night calling me God," he offered with a laugh.

"And why would that have been?" Tracey asked with a flirty smile.

"God… Oh, God… Right there, God, Yes..." he said as he locked eyes with Addison. "It was a hell of an ego boost."

Addison let out a giggle. "That does sound like me…"

"Tripp..." he offered holding out his hand.

"That's right! I remember you." She looked over to Tracey. "My last night in LA before I joined the tour…" She turned back to Tripp. "What are you doing in…. Where are we again?" she asked looking back over to Tracey.

"Michigan."

Tripp smiled. "I'm a student at UM."

"That explains why you've switched out the leather for the mid-west all American look."

"When in Rome," he said with a teasing smile. "And what do you mean tour?"

"You didn't know?" Tracey said with a large smile. "This hot thing plays bass and we're currently touring the country!"

"You are?"

Addison nodded.

"You should come to see us tonight!" Tracey offered eagerly.

"I'd love to… but tonight's a big mixer at our fraternity house… you could stop by, after the show," he said, his voice taking on a suggestive tone.

"We'll see..." Addison smiled.

"Tripp! Let's go, man!" One of his friends called over.

He rolled his eyes. "Looks like we're leaving." He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a pen. "You left so quickly last time, I never got a chance to do this." He took her hand and pushed up her jacket sleeve, writing his number under the skeleton tattoo on her forearm. "Use that..." he clicked his pen closed and winked at her. "It was good seeing you again, Meg," he said softly before heading off to meet back up with his friends.

"So…" Tracey said with a giggle as he turned to look at her. "Meg?"

Addison let out a laugh. "It's my middle name."

* * *

Before Tracey could even finish opening the door of the bus, Bucky was already yelling at them.

"Did you both forget how to answer a fucking phone?!"

Addison rolled her eyes and dropped her shopping bags down on the bench seat. "Keep your wig on, B. We're back before soundcheck."

He let out a frustrated growl through clenched teeth. "There isn't going to be a soundcheck today. If you weren't so busy getting wasted, waking everyone up, and going on a shopping spree at fucking Nordstrom you would have fucking known that!"

"Shopping was my idea," Tracey offered.

"And it was Nordstrom Rack… let's not get too excited," Addison added.

Bucky just shook his head. "Stacey is still sick. She's been throwing up all day..." he let out a loud sigh. "I need a fucking cigarette..." he mumbled to himself as he walked towards the door. "I expect a new song out of you two."

"Poor Stacey..." Tracey whispered with a sad pout as the door slammed shut. He looked over to Addison and smiled wide, grabbing her arm and pushing up the sleeve of her sweater.

"What are you doing?"

"Taking that blonde Adonis up on his offer…" he said with a smile. "The best way to get over your little problem is to get under a new one… We're crashing that frat party tonight!"

.

* * *

Tracey whistled as Addison stepped out of the bathroom dressed in a black leather dress and stilettos. "You look so insanely hot!" he laughed. "But you can't wear that, hun."

"Why the hell not? And why are YOU wearing a polo shirt and a baseball cap?"

"Have you ever been to a frat party, darling?"

She eyed him suspiciously. "No..."

He sighed dramatically and pulled her over to her bunk. He quickly got to work rummaging through her clothes.

"Woah… You look..."

Addison looked up to see Zed standing in the entrance of the hall with his mouth hanging open.

"Do you own anything that isn't leather or vintage rock?" Tracey called out.

"Check the smaller bag," Addison said, still not breaking eye contact with Zed.

"YES!" Tracey shouted victoriously. He jumped out of her bunk and handed her a pair of distressed jeans and a sheer white blouse. "Wear this with that faux fur coat we bought today, your kingsnake Gucci scarf and matching flats… you'll still be the best dressed one there, but you won't stand out... nearly as… much..." he said as he followed her gaze over to the other end of the hall. "Oh, hey Z. I didn't know you guys were back." He turned back to Addison and hugged her excitedly. "This is going to be so much fun!"

"Where are you going?" Zed asked as he pushed himself off the door frame.

"Craziest thing ever! When we were shopping, this completely gorgeous guy kept eyeing up this one," Tracey said with a large smile. "Turns out, they had hooked up back in LA! What are the chances!"

Zed's eyes grew wide as Tracey continued to talk.

"Anywho, he goes to school here and invited us to a party tonight at his fraternity! God, I haven't been to a frat party in YEARS!" he clapped his hands together in eager anticipation and planted a kiss on Addison's cheek. "Go get changed, Princess!" he said as he practically bounced past Zed to the front of the bus.

They still hadn't broken eye contact as Zed started to slowly walk towards her.

"Frat party?"

Addison shrugged. "Yeah… figured we could raise a little hell," she whispered almost breathlessly as he stepped into her personal space.

"With an old flame?"

She smiled up at him through her lashes. "Jealous?"

"Yes."

"Good."

"At least you're changing your clothes..." he whispered as his hand ghosted up her side.

She fought to keep her eyes open. "Why's that?"

"Because in that outfit… hell wouldn't be the only thing you'd be raising tonight."

"Princess! Car is here!" Tracey yelled from the front of the bus.

She arched her brow and smiled as she deliberately ran her tongue over her bottom lip. "That's the plan… looks like I'm wearing this dress after all," she said as she pushed him away and grabbed her coat, walking towards the front of the bus.

Zed followed after her, grabbing Bonzo by the arm as he passed him on his way out the door.

"Where are we..."

"Just go with it..." Zed whispered as they continued to follow Addison across the parking lot.

"The guys are coming too?!" Tracey called out excitedly. "Do none of you know how to dress for this?!"

"What?" Addison spun around to see Zed and Bonzo walking towards them. She rolled her eyes. "What are you doing?"

"Going to a party!" Zed answered as he opened the back door of the car and got in.

.

* * *

"Meg! You made it!" Tripp shouted excitedly as he ran over to meet her as she exited the car. He lifted her up and spun her around, making her giggle. "And I see you brought some friends?"

She nodded. "You remember Tracey, I'm sure."

"Hey man, nice to see you again," Tripp said, reaching out to shake Tracey's hand while still holding Addison close.

"And these two would be Zed and Bonzo, they play in the other band we're touring with. We didn't invite them, they just chose to tag along."

Tripp shrugged and shook their hands. "All are welcome. Kegs are in the back and the band is already playing."

"Thanks," Zed said politely as Tracey waved at them and ran towards the house to escape the biting cold. "So… Tripp, was it?"

"Yeah."

"How do you know Princess?" he asked nodding over to Addison.

Tripp's cheeks pinked a little as he stole a glance in her direction. "We met back in LA when I was home for the summer."

"Really?"

"Yeah, it was pretty crazy running into her today at the mall… But the second I saw her, I knew it was her, even with the new hair color," he smiled over to her. "You left quite the impression."

Addison smiled up at him through her lashes and ran her hand affectionately over his chest.

"You look so hot..."

She bit her lip and gave him the same look she knew drove Zed wild. "I'm always hot..." she said seductively as she took his hand and started to pull him towards the large house.

"Yes, you are..." Tripp said as he let her lead the way.

Zed clenched his fists.

"And why are we here?" Bonzo whispered, leaning over closer to him.

He growled deep in his chest and started towards the house.

Bonzo shook his head. "That's what I was worried about..."

* * *

"Drink?" Tripp offered loudly over the sound of the band playing a particularly bad

cover of a top 40 hit.

"What?"

"DO YOU WANT A DRINK?"

She nodded her head and followed him through the house and into the backyard. "Sorry, it gets loud," he said with a laugh.

She smiled back as he grabbed two red solo cups.

"Beer or punch?"

"Hmm… what's in the punch?"

Tripp chuckled. "Basically anything alcoholic plus some fruit punch."

"Vodka?"

"A few bottles, yeah."

She shook her head. "Yeah… better stay away from that one. I'll go with a beer I guess."

"You got it," he said as he looked over to a nervous-looking younger man. "PLEDGE!"

The young man took the cups from him and filled them both up. His hands shook as he handed them to him.

"Here you go," Tripp said as he handed her one of the cups.

"Thanks..." She said, motioning over to the young man.

"I'm the president of the fraternity. That kid wants to join. He's basically my bitch until I decide if he's in or not."

She nodded with wide eyes. "Sounds... interesting." She took a tentative sip of her beer and cringed, much to his amusement.

"Sorry, it's beast. It's the cheapest kegs we can get."

She waved him off and smiled. "It's fine."

"Yo! Tripp!" one of his fraternity brothers called out from the back door. "The singer from the band is throwing up all over the fucking place."

He turned to look at Addison, mouthing the word 'sorry' to her before turning back towards the door. "Get one of the pledges to clean it up!"

"Already doing that. But what the fuck are we going to do about music?"

"Bro, just get Justin to set up his deejay equip."

"He said it's going to take at least forty-five minutes to drag it all down and set it up."

Tripp let out a frustrated sigh. "Can't we just turn on a fucking radio until then?"

"Bro… TKE is having a mixer tonight, too. You want to lose half these people to those jerk-offs?"

Tripp turned to Addison. "I hate to even ask this, but… Do you or anyone you came with sing?"

She nodded her head. "Tracey sings some of our songs… Zed's the lead for Zombies."

"Do you think there's a chance either of them could step in? Just for a little while until my bro can get everything set up?"

Addison motioned towards the door. "You can ask them now."

"Ask us what?" Tracey said as he bounced over to her and draped his arm around her. "Found her!" he called back over towards Zed and Bonzo."

Tripp cleared his throat and tried to ignore the death glare that Zed was giving him. "As I'm sure everyone inside has noticed, the singer is um..."

"Puking his guts out?" Bonzo offered.

"Yeah…"

"So is the drummer," Zed added as he finished off his cup of punch. "Fucking amateurs..."

"Would any of you four be able to fill in?"

"You've got to be kidding?" Zed rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Aww, I'm sorry, I'd love to," Tracey said. "But our drummers aren't here."

"I could drum," Addison offered.

"Excuse me?!" Tracey said as he turned towards her. "You play drums, too?!"

She nodded her head. "I mean, I'm not as good as Eliza, but I can hold my own."

"How dare you be so talented! Is there anything you can't do?"

"Fine," Zed said. "If Princess is breaking out the drum skills, I'll sing… but I want Bonz on bass."

"No fair!" Tracey called out. "I wanna play too!"

"Take it up with their other guitarist," Zed said with a shrug.

"Seriously? You guys are really going to play?"

Addison looked around at all of them. "Seems like it..."

"This is..." Tripp smiled ear to ear before picking Addison up and planting a kiss on her lips. "Thank you!"

"Can we just do this already?" Zed called out angrily before walking back into the house.

* * *

"Okay, we open with the new one we were working on this afternoon, and then we..."

"Who the hell put you in charge?" Addison snapped at him.

"You want me to help out your boyfriend then I'm picking the fucking songs."

"He's not my boyfriend! And why are you even here? Shouldn't you be hooking up with your girlfriend?"

"Children… can't we all GET THE FUCK ALONG?" Bonzo said through clenched teeth. "I swear you two..." he mumbled under his breath. "Am I the only one even attempting to keep your secret at this point?!"

Tracey walked back up to them on the make-shift stage with a few water bottles. "So what's the playlist?" he asked excitedly.

Addison rolled her eyes. "If you want to open with the new song you wrote today, then we're following up with the one we wrote today too."

"Fine," Zed sneered. "Stitches after."

"Fine. Then Nicotine," Addison countered back through clenched teeth.

Tracey looked between the two of them and gave Addison a questioning look. "You okay, dollface?"

"Never. Fucking. Better."

Tripp chose that exact moment to walk over to them. "Are you guys all set?"

"YES." They both snapped at the same time.

"Ooookay…." Tripp said as he took a careful step away. "Um… just out of curiosity… what type of music do you all play?"

They all slowly looked over to him like it was the dumbest question they had ever heard.

"Really?" Zed asked motioning down to his attire of leather on leather and then to the rest of them.

Tripp swallowed loudly and took another step back. "I'll just let you guys play… thank you again..." he quickly walked off.

Zed tuned the borrowed guitar and fired off a quick scale as Addison sat down behind the drum kit. She twirled a drumstick around her fingers and tested out the bass pedal.

"Think you can cut it back there, Princess?" he asked.

She smiled sweetly and flipped him off. "I'm pretty sure I can handle anything you managed to write."

"We'll see about that..."

Without giving a warning he tore into the intro of the song he, Bonzo, and Eliza had written earlier that afternoon.

Addison rolled her eyes and quickly picked up on the fast tempo he was setting, followed almost immediately by Bonzo and Tracey.

"I won't stand in your way  
Let your hatred grow  
And she'll scream  
And she'll shout  
And she'll pray  
And she had a name  
Yeah she had a name

And I won't hold you back  
Let your anger rise  
And we'll fly  
And we'll fall  
And we'll burn  
No one will recall  
No one will recall..."

Addison threw in a flourish, catching him off guard for a second. He shook his head and refocused.

"This is the last time I'll abandon you  
And this is the last time I'll forget you  
I wish I could..."

He turned and locked eyes with her as he played.

"Look to the stars  
Let hope burn in your eyes  
And we'll love  
And we'll hope  
And we'll die  
All to no avail  
All to no avail

This is the last time I'll abandon you  
And this is the last time I'll forget you  
I wish I could..."

He threw her a wink as he played the outro.

Addison rolled her eyes and waited for him to finish before she cracked out a four-count to start their next song.

Tracey stepped up to the microphone.

"Count me in unannounced, drag my nails on the tile  
I just follow your scent  
You can't just follow my smile  
All of your flaws are aligned with this mood of mine  
Cutting me to the bone  
Nothing left to leave behind  
You ought to keep me concealed just like I was a weapon  
I didn't come for a fight but I will fight till the end  
This might be your battle, might not turn out okay  
You know you look so Seattle, but you feel so LA

Eh eh eh eh eh  
Eh eh eh eh eh..."

Zed's head whipped over to Addison who was already smiling overly sweetly at him as she kept up the beat.

"Eh eh eh eh eh  
Eh eh eh eh eh

And I love the way you hurt me  
It's irresistible, oh oh oh oh oh oh  
It's irresistible, oh oh oh oh oh oh yeah  
I love the way  
I love the way  
I love the way you hurt me, baby..."

Addison mouthed the words, never breaking eye contact with Zed.

"I love the way  
I love the way  
I love the way you hurt me, baby,

You hurt me one time then I love it  
You hurt me two times then fuck it  
When you laid your eyes on me, you was excited  
And I was the fuel to your flame, I ignited  
Then you stole my heart, that's the heart of a lion  
So fuck all this shit, let's just start up a riot  
This world is so cold that's why I bought a fur coat…"

It was Zed's turn to roll his eyes.

"It's irresistible, oh oh oh oh oh oh  
It's irresistible, oh oh oh oh oh oh yeah  
I love the way  
I love the way  
I love the way you hurt me, baby,  
I love the way  
I love the way  
I love the way you hurt me, baby..."

Zed arched his brow at her as the song came to an end. She licked her middle finger as she flipped him off before blowing him a kiss. He fought back a smile, opting to roll his eyes instead. He took a steadying breath and started the next song.

The loud drunk crowd around them cheered and screamed for more as their mini-set came to an end. Despite the back and forth battle she and Zed had been waging the entire time, Addison had to admit that the four of them played well with each other. They were completely in sync. Call and response rhythms and flourishes coming naturally between them all, despite never having practiced together.

"That was awesome!" Tripp said as he jumped up onto the makeshift stage, pulling her out of her internal thoughts. He went in for a hug.

Addison held her arms out in front of her, blocking him. "Woah… I definitely need a few minutes to cool down, I'm a sweaty mess," she fanned herself for emphasis as she gave him a soft smile. "I'm going to head outside for a cigarette, I'll be right back."

"I'll be right here. Hurry back to me." He threw her a wink and then went to help finish setting up the deejay equipment that had been brought into the room.

Addison made her way through the overly crowded room of college co-eds and out the front door. The moment the cold air hit her she inhaled sharply, allowing it to soak into her bones. She shivered and started down the steps.

She was a few feet away from the house when she heard him calling her name.

"Adds..."

She turned around to see him jogging over to her. "Zed, what are you..."

He didn't give

her a chance to finish her question as he pulled her into him and kissed her hard.

She pulled away and slapped him across the face. They both stood their silently starring at one another for less than a heartbeat before she grabbed onto his jacket and pulled him back into her. Her eyes fluttered closed as she gave herself over to the feel of his tongue moving against hers, his hands wound in her hair and around her waist. Her leg hitched up onto his hip.

The sound of a catcall from somewhere nearby broke the spell between them.

She pushed him away again. "Damnit, Z…" She was fighting hard to hold back the sudden urge to cry. She looked up to the sky and shook her head. Without saying another word, she turned and walked back towards the house.

* * *

She had only been back in the overcrowded house for a moment when she heard her name.

"Meg!" Tripp called out as he waved to her from across the room.

She forced a smile to her face and walked over to where he was standing.

"Here," he said loudly over the music as he handed her a cup. "I got you a fresh drink."

"Thank you." She took a sip and cringed.

"Why don't we go find someplace a little quieter?" he whispered in her ear.

"WHAT?"

"I said… WHY DON'T WE GO FIND SOMEPLACE A LITTLE MORE QUIET?" He took her hand and pulled her away from the raucous crowd and up the stairway.

"I can not thank you enough for playing tonight. You saved our party!" he said as he opened up a door at the end of the hall, motioning for her to walk in.

"It was nothing, really. I'm glad we were able to help." She looked around the room, walking over to a wall of pictures.

"And you..." he smiled wrapping his arm around her from behind, "You were amazing. Drums and bass... Do you play anything else?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah… quite a few other instruments actually." She motioned over to a guitar propped up in the corner. "Do you play?"

"Honestly?" he let out a soft laugh. "No. It's literally just to impress girls. They love the idea of a musician. Make sure you drink that while it's still cold. It tastes worse warm"

She laughed and nodded her head, taking another small sip. "Thanks… And yeah...the ladies do swoon for a good looking guy with a guitar."

"Do you?"

She nodded her head again and smirked. "Oh, yeah… I am definitely not immune to that one."

"I have to say, watching you play… I was a little worried you and the guy with the green hair had a thing."

"Which guy with the green hair?"

"The singer."

Addison pressed her lips in a thin line. "No, we're not together. He's sleeping with the singer in the band I'm in." She walked over and set her cup down on the nightstand and picked up the guitar, strumming out a D chord. "Yikes..." she said turning the tuning pegs. "You should at least learn how to tune this thing… Heaven forbid you have to pretend to play it."

"I'll keep that in mind."

She strummed out a few more chords and smiled. "There… much better."

"You look so hot holding that thing. Is guitar one of the several other instruments you play?"

She smiled and rolled her eyes. "Tripp, I'm always hot… and yes, the guitar is my favorite instrument to play."

"Can you play something for me?"

She sat down on the edge of his bed and started to strum again.

"Dirty tissues, trust issues  
Glasses on the sink, they didn't fix you  
Lonely pillows in a strangers bed  
Little voices in my head

Secret keeping, stop the bleeding  
Lost a little weight because I wasn't eating  
All the songs that I can't listen to, to tell the truth

Loving you was young, and wild, and free  
Loving you was cool, and hot, and sweet  
Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound  
A steady place to let down my defenses  
But loving you had consequences

No, ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh  
Said, ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh  
Hey, no ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

Loving you was dumb, dark, and cheap  
Loving you will still take shots at me  
Found loving you was sunshine, but then it poured  
And I lost so much more than my senses  
'Cause loving you had consequences..."

"Wow… that was beautiful," he whispered as he brushed a stray piece of hair off her face.

"Thank you..." she said softly as she set the guitar aside

"Why didn't you say you were a singer when I asked earlier?"

She smiled up at him and shrugged. "I don't sing on stage."

"Well, you should… I still can't believe I didn't know you were a musician."

She let out a soft laugh. "Well, it's not like we talked a whole lot the last time we met."

"This is true," he said with a smile. "We were both pretty drunk… Speaking of drinks, you should finish yours..."

She smiled back and took a sip, cringing again as she swallowed. "Seriously, how do you drink this stuff?"

He shrugged. "You get used to it."

Addison rolled her shoulder and flinched.

"You okay?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah, I just haven't played drums in years. I think I used muscles I forgot I had," she said with a giggle.

"Well, let's see what we can do about that… Why don't you finish off that drink and then lose the jacket."

She took a larger sip and set the cup on the nightstand again. Slowly she shrugged out of her coat.

Tripp re-positioned himself behind her and started to rub her shoulder.

"Oh, God that feels so good..." she moaned.

They both looked up as the door flew open.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I swear I didn't intend to leave this on a cliffy, but this chapter got away from me and was approaching well over 11,000 words. So… it got split. Next update coming soon!**

**Speaking of updates…. I will also be updating "All I Want For Christmas" on Monday, and I'm also hoping to have the WAY overdue next chapter of Watch Us Shine out next week as well.**

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**-Why Do You Love Me, Garbage**

**-Stockholm Syndrome, Muse**

**-Irresistible, Fall Out Boy**

**-Consequences, Camilla Cabelo **


	24. Love Is Madness

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

**Chapter 24**

**LOVE IS MADNES****S**

Zed watched as Addison walked away from him and back into the house. He looked up at the sky and pulled at the ends of his hair. "Fuck!" With a heavy sigh, he pulled out his cigarettes and lit one up.

"You are insane  
My desire  
A violent daydream  
Love, love..."

He shook his head and grabbed his notepad out of his back pocket, jotting a few notes down. "At least I can get a fucking song out of this disaster," he mumbled to himself. He shoved the notepad back into his pocket and finished off his cigarette before heading back inside. He scanned the crowded room, finally spotting Bonzo sitting in the corner typing on his phone.

"Hey Bonz, you ready to bounce?" He asked as he walked up to him.

Bonzo looked around. "Yeah… more than ready." He finished off his beer and stood up, pocketing his phone. "You want to grab Addie and Tracey?"

Zed shook his head. "I'm sure they're having fun."

As they made their way through the crowd Zed overheard Tripp's name. He stopped walking and turned towards a small group of guys talking.

"No man, he took that hot drummer chick upstairs."

His fists clenched. He turned to Bonzo and rolled his eyes. "Yeah… we definitely need to leave."

"Lucky bastard. She's so out of his fucking league," one of the other guys laughed.

"No shit… He was so fucking cocky earlier, talking about how he'd hooked up with her in Los Angeles over the summer, and that she was all fucking over him… Dude… he was PISSED when he saw her eye-fucking that dude from the band..."

Zed smiled to himself and kept walking. At least he'd accomplished something.

"Why do you think he slipped a few of these in her drink," one of the other douchey frat guys laughed as he held up an orange pill bottle. "She'll be out in no time."

Zed stopped abruptly. His vision turned red, his hands balled into fists ready to fight.

Bonzo grabbed onto his arm to stop him. "Forget them, go find her," he said urgently. "I'll get Tracey. We'll be right behind you."

He nodded and took off toward the stairs.

* * *

"Oh, God that feels so good..."

A loud crack caught their attention as the door flew open. Zed stood in the doorway, chest heaving, eyes blazing. His heavy footfalls pounded towards them and he grabbed Tripp by the hair. With one quick yank, he dragged him off the bed and spun him face-first into his fist.

Addison jumped up. "Zed! Are you fucking crazy!"

"Motherfucker," Zed seethed. Spit gathering at the corner of his lips as he twisted, throwing his weight and muscle into another punch- this one to the gut. Tripp folded in half grasping his middle.

"Aren't you two going to stop him!" Addison screamed over to Bonzo and Tracey who were now standing in the doorway.

"Nope..." Bonzo said, folding his arms across his chest.

"Goddamnit, I swear..." she started to walk over to try to break them up, only to stop herself and rub her forehead. "Zed… Stop..." she said, blinking a few times and trying to take a step forward.

Zed thew a left, a right, another left. A blur of motion, flailing body parts, and silent fury. "Tracey, get her out of here..."

"Don't...try to te...tell me wha… what to do..." she took a step towards him but stumbled.

"Princess..." Tracey said as he rushed to her side. "Are you okay?"

She blinked a couple of times. "Yeah… I'm..." she closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead again before collapsing into his arms.

"We've got company Z!" Bonzo hollered as he swung at one of Tripps fraternity brothers who had been in a nearby room.

Zed paused for a couple of seconds to catch his breath. "Tracey, get her outside and call 911 and then call Bucky!" He tackled Tripp to the floor where the two of them became a web of arms and legs straining to gain purchase.

* * *

"I want the fucking book thrown at him! We're talking about my baby-sister!" Bucky screamed into the phone.

"Could you keep it down? Some of us are trying to sleep..." she rasped from the bed.

Bucky's head snapped up. "She's awake! Angelo, I'll call you back." He hung up his phone and walked over to her bedside. "How are you feeling Addie-loo?"

"Like I've been hit by a cement-mixer going 90 on the freeway."

"Well, if it makes you feel better you look like frosted shit cookies with a side of rancid milk."

She let out a soft laugh and shook her head. "You say the sweetest things, brother-dear."

He leaned over and kissed the top of her head. "You know I'm teasing you. You look beautiful… just tired."

She sighed and hugged him. "What the hell happened?"

"What do you remember?"

"I was at a party… we played..."

"You guys played a gig without me there?"

She looked up at him and smirked. "Are you finished interrupting me?"

"Sorry… continue..."

"Anywho… we played, Tripp and I went upstairs… and then… Zed?" she asked unsurely.

Bucky nodded his head. "I've obviously been given the second-hand account of things from Tracey, the doctors, and the police, but here's what they say happened…" He took a deep breath as he reached for her hands. "You were brought in earlier tonight unconscious. You tested positive for a substance called GHB."

She sat herself up as best as she could without the room spinning. "Bucky, I swear I didn't take anything. You have to believe me."

"I know… it was put in your drink."

"What?"

He nodded before continuing. "It's a popular date rape drug. It slows activity in the central nervous system, and when a high dose is taken it can cause loss of consciousness, seizures, difficulty seeing, and the inability to recall what happened when drugged."

"Wait… you mean Tripp tried to..." she shook her head. "That makes no sense whatsoever! Why would he…."

Bucky shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. I just know that I've never been so thankful that you're friends with the guys."

Addison gave him a questioning look.

"If it hadn't been for Zed and Bonzo overhearing one of the frat guys bragging about how that Tripp guy spiked your drink, god only knows what could have happened. I mean, I'm pissed as hell they're in jail and I have to go bail them out, but shit… I'm so fucking grateful they were there." He hugged her tight and kissed her head again.

"Zed's in jail?"

"And Bonz..." Bucky nodded.

"Why?"

"Because Zed beat the crap out of that guy, and Bonzo knocked out a couple of other guys who tried to break it up."

"Oh my god, are they okay?"

"I'd assume so… I haven't been down to the station yet. I do know that Tripp is in this hospital. Unfortunately, he's got a cop outside his door… or I'd have him in the morgue."

"Well, that explains why you were on the phone with Angelo..." Addison whispered.

Bucky nodded his head. "My cousin already has all the papers ready to go for when you give the cops your statement. I want that fucker in jail for a long ass time. All you need to do is talk to the detective who keeps popping in here to check on you."

"B… I'm can't press charges."

He pulled back and looked at her incredulously. "What do you mean? Adds, he tried to..."

"I know… And I'm angry as hell," She interrupted, holding her hospital band up for him to see. "But think about it, B… A fake name only goes so far. If I press charges I have to use my real name. If I use my real name, this leaks to the press. And if it leaks to the press then your other cousin's side business gets exposed, and then..."

Bucky held up a hand to stop her. "I see your point… I don't like it, but I see it." He was quiet for a moment before he smiled over to her. "My Dad was right, you would be a great mobster."

Addison rolled her eyes and hugged him, pulling him closer to her. "However your family decides to handle this… because I know you're not going to let this go… I don't want to know about it."

"You got it, sis."

* * *

Paperwork. So much paperwork. Between the hospital discharge papers, her official statement, the forms dropping all charges, and then the release forms for Zed and Bonzo, she'd spent the better portion of the pre-dawn and early morning hours filling out paperwork. Addison sighed and rolled her head back as she finally finished signing the last form. She sat down in an insanely uncomfortable plastic chair and waited. After about an hour's wait, a police officer walked Bonzo out.

"Addison?" he asked as if he couldn't believe his eyes. "I was expecting Bucky..."

She smiled and waited for him to be uncuffed before she threw her arms around him and hugged him close. "Like my best friend would ever forgive me if I let you rot in jail. And I told Bucky bailing you guys out was the least I could do."

Bonzo hugged her back and sighed. "Are you okay?"

"I'll be fine...Thank you for what you did last night…"

"Like Bree would ever forgive me for letting something happen to her best friend… and don't even get me started on what Z would do to me..."

She let out a soft laugh and motioned towards the exit. "Uber is waiting outside. I'll call another one… I think Z and I need to talk."

"That would be an understatement," he laughed as he kissed her cheek. "I'll see you guys in a little while." He hugged her once more and walked out the door.

With a heavy sigh she sat back down in the uncomfortable plastic chair she had been sitting in previously and leaned her head against the wall, closing her eyes.

"Beautiful… wake up..."

She could feel a warm hand caress her cheek.

"Addison, rise and shine..."

Her eyes fluttered open to meet his warm brown eyes. "...Hey," she whispered sleepily.

"Hey," he smiled back at her. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired… you?"

"Same… Thanks for bailing me out."

"Thanks for saving me."

"Anytime, gorgeous… Let's get out of here."

She nodded her head and stood up. An awkward silence widening the gap between them. She turned and walked

for the door with him right behind her.

She walked them away from the building, trudging through the snow towards a small cluster of trees down the street where the Uber she had called was waiting. She stopped with her hand on the door. "I need you to be honest with me. No bullshit."

He nodded his head.

"Lacey..."

"Addison, look at me," he took her hands in his and looked into her eyes. "I swear, I was telling you the truth the other night. She cornered me and I was trying to diffuse the situation. I want nothing to do with her in any way, shape, or form."

She was silent for a moment before she nodded. "Okay..." She opened the car door and climbed in.

Zed followed in after her and closed the door behind himself. Without saying a word she rested her head on his shoulder. She took his hand in hers and lightly rubbed her thumb across his scabbed knuckles. "Does this hurt?"

"A little..."

She brought them up to her lips and gently kissed them.

He let out a contented sigh. "Better than Morphine."

She smiled and shut her eyes, nuzzling into his side and falling asleep once more.

.

* * *

"OH MY GOD!" Tracey exclaimed as Addison and Zed walked onto the bus. He threw his arms around her and hugged her as tight as he could. "I'm so sorry, dollface! I haven't even been able to sleep! I've been so worried!"

She hugged him back just as tight.

He pulled back so that he could look at her at arm's length. "I'm so sorry I took that asshole up on his offer to go to that party!"

She rolled her eyes and smiled. "None of what happened is your fault, so please don't beat yourself up over it." She hugged him again. "Thank you for getting me out of there."

"You know I love you, Princess. You're literally my favorite person in the world."

"Awwww… You two are so cute," Eliza called over from the bench seat as Zed plopped down next to her.

"I love you too, E!" Tracey laughed. He pulled back from Addison again. "Now that I know you're okay, I'm going to go try to get a few hours of sleep." He smacked a loud kiss on her lips and walked towards the hall.

"Everyone else still asleep?" Addison asked as she walked over to Eliza and hugged her.

"Yeah… Well, Lacey isn't back yet, but everyone else is asleep."

She nodded her head. "In that case, I'm going to take advantage of the empty shower." She gave Zed a small smile and walked off.

"So… how was the slammer?" Eliza asked as she looked over to Zed.

"As pleasant as ever," he laughed.

"Well, at least you were fighting for a good cause this time," she teased as she ruffled his hair affectionately. "I'm proud of you stretch."

Zed chuckled and pushed her hand away. "Thanks, E.

"Speaking of sleep," Bucky said as he walked out of the hall yawning. "Do you need to get any before the show tonight?"

"Nah, I'm good. I slept in the car on the way back over here."

"Good," he nodded his head and walked over to Zed, pulling him into a hug. "Thank you for getting Casey out of there last night."

Zed gave him an odd look. "Wait, so you're not going to bitch me out for fighting and getting arrested?"

"Nope."

He looked over to Eliza. "Are you witnessing this?"

She smiled and rolled her eyes. "I told you. It was for a good cause this time."

Bucky straightened up and patted him on the shoulder. "I'm going to make some coffee," he said as he walked off towards the kitchen.

Zed stood up and shrugged out of his jacket, taking his notebook out of his jacket pocket. He walked over to the small table and sat back down, grabbing a pen and highlighter from the pencil cup.

"Whatcha working on?" Eliza asked as she absentmindedly twirled a drumstick around her fingers.

"A song… Actually, I could use your help."

"With?"

"It's a duet. But I really need a female voice for this to work."

"Why would you write a song like that? You know I don't sing."

"Yeah, I know. But the idea came to me last night at that fucking party, and I wrote it out. I kept going over it and singing it in my head while I was sitting there last night and now I just have to hear it….Please?" he said as he capped the highlighter and put on the biggest pout he could.

Eliza rolled her eyes. "Fine. Plugin and let's see what you've got."

"Yes!" Thanks, E!" He handed her the sheet of paper. "Your parts are highlighted." He grabbed his guitar and sat down next to her, plugging into the portable amp.

She rolled her eyes again. "Here goes nothing..."

Zed laughed and started to strum his guitar.  
"You are insane  
My desire  
A violent daydream  
Love, love..."

Eliza took a deep breath.  
"You are crazy  
A perfect liar  
Said you'd save me  
Love, love..."

"I know the moment I looked into your eyes  
I'd have to swallow all your lies

I never said that I would be your lover."

"I never said that I would be your friend..."

"Stop, stop, stop..." Zed suddenly said holding his hands up. "It's just not working."

"You know I don't sing, Z."

"I know," he sighed heavily as he stood up and stretched. "I just really wanted to try it."

"Why don't you get one of the Acey's to help you out?" Bucky offered as he walked back into the room. "That song had some potential."

Eliza rolled her eyes. "Yeah, right. Like Lacey would ever allow anyone to help this one," she said pointing over towards Zed.

Zed threw his hands in the air and plopped himself back down onto the couch.

Bucky shook his head and typed out a quick text. "You're lucky you happen to be in my good graces at the moment."

They all looked up to see Addison walking in drying her hair with a towel. "You summoned?"

Bucky smiled sweetly up at her from his spot at the table. "Zed here wrote a new song but needs a female voice... and E can't sing to save her life...No offense."

Eliza held up her hands. "None taken. It's a well-known fact."

"So what do you say?" Bucky asked.

"Are you going to put out the fire when Lacey finds out?"

"Don't worry about Lacey."

She rolled her eyes, "Riiiight." She tossed her towel to Bucky and walked over to take the music sheet from Eliza's outstretched hand. "Let's do this I guess."

Zed tried to hide his smile as he stood up and picked up his guitar again, strumming out the intro once more.  
"You are insane  
My desire  
A violent daydream  
Love, love..."

Addison arched her brow at him as she picked up the next line.

"You are crazy  
A perfect liar  
Said you'd save me  
Love, love..."

Zed looked up and met her eyes as he joined in. "I knew the moment I looked into your eyes  
I'd have to swallow all your lies.

I never said that I would be your lover..."

"I never said that I would be your friend..."

"I never said that I would take no other"

"Be your lover"

"Never said..."

Zed motioned to Addison to pick up the next verse.

"You are insane, my desire  
A dangerous game  
Love, love"

"You are crazy,  
A perfect liar  
Simply save me  
Love, love"

They both subconsciously moved closer together as they sang. "I knew the moment I looked into your eyes

I'd have to swallow all your lies..."

"I never said that I would be your lover"

"I never said that I would be your friend..."

"I never said that I would take no other"

"Be your lover"

"Never said…  
Oh, whoa, no, oh, no, whoa…."

"Love is madness" they both harmonized through almost gritted teeth. Both of them pouring all their frustrations and emotions into the song.

"I knew the moment..."

"I knew the moment..."

"I knew the moment…Love is madness  
I knew the moment I looked into your eyes..."

"I knew the moment I looked into your eyes"

"I knew the moment I looked into your eyes"

"Love is madness" They both panted, trying to catch their breath, their faces only inches apart.

"Will you two please just go fuck and get it over with?" Tracey said, making his presence known. "That was hot as hell...I will totally cover for you… OOOH! Can I watch?"

"There's still a no fraternization policy in place," Bucky said standing up and giving them both a poignant look. "But...that was...damn that was good." He smiled as he looked between them. "Is there any way we can work that into the set?"

"Oh, no...I couldn't..." Addison said, slowly walking backward away from them, already feeling the familiar panic starting to rise in her chest.

"You totally should, Princess!" Eliza added.

"And don't worry about Lacey, I'll deal with her."

"It's not Lacey I'm worried about, Bucky..." she mumbled under her breath as she continued to slowly back away from them.

"Come on… Please?" Zed pretended to pout.

"I...I...I can't!" She said before running off the bus, pushing past Lacey who was just opening the door.

"What the hell was that all about?" Lacey asked as she walked onto the bus. "And why is everyone just standing here?"

Zed rolled his eyes and stormed past her out the door. He looked around the snow-filled parking lot, finally seeing her walking towards the right side of the building. He ran off towards her. "Addison!"

She spun around, surprised to hear her name being called out that loudly. "Are you crazy! Are you trying to blow my cover?!"

"I don't give a shit...What the hell was that all about in there?"

"I don't want to talk about it!"

"That song was amazing. We were amazing. I know you felt it."

"Yeah, Zed. I did. I felt it on all kinds of levels…" she said as she fought back her tears. She turned back around and continued to walk off.

"Damnit! Will you stop running off! I'm so tired of this shit! Why won't you sing?"

She stopped dead in her tracks and spun back around. "Because I'm terrified! There! Are you happy now?!" She yelled before storming off once more.

Zed pulled at his hair in frustration before chasing after her. He grabbed her roughly by the shoulder and spun her around. "Since when? What the hell happened? You were born to fucking perform. Hell, you sang your ass off on top of that bar back on your birthday!"

"Since I got the news that my Dad

died while I was on stage singing instead of being by his bedside. Since the last time I sang center stage was his memorial service and I couldn't even make it through the damn song without having a complete breakdown! Since every time I even think about singing on stage I can't fucking breathe! Take your pick, Zed!" she said sniffling back the tears that were threatening to spill. "And I was trashed on my birthday. I can't perform on stage trashed."

Zed let go of her shoulder. "Fuck...I'm sorry."

"It's fine."

"No...it's not." He stood there awkwardly for a moment before he was struck with a brilliant idea. "I'm going to help you."

"Zed..."

"Adds, you are way too talented of a musician and singer to be hiding in the corner of the stage while some two-bit marginally competent hack holds the spotlight."

"I don't want the spotlight anymore."

"You should at the very least be sharing it."

"You aren't going to drop this...are you?"

"Nope. Consider this my way of thanking you for bailing me out."

"Me bailing you out was a thank you for saving me from that creep. We're already even."

He took her hands in his and looked into her eyes. "Please?"

"Fine. What's your plan...I know you already have one."

"Of course I do. I'm always prepared."

"Except when you're not," she mumbled under her breath, her teeth practically rattling in the cold.

"I let you get away with the mumbled comment the other day, I'm not letting it slide again. What did you say?"

She huffed out a breath and looked away, refusing to meet his eyes. "I said 'Except when you're not'."

Zed sighed dramatically. "You find yourself without a condom on your persons one time...one...and you never hear the end of it," he teased with a smirk. "If I remember right, I offered to go back upstairs and get one, but someone wasn't having any of that."

"I'm just saying...not 'always prepared'… Fucking vodka..."

"Well, I am this time." He pulled her around to the front entrance of the building. "But I'm going to need to get you somewhere warmer and I'm going to need your bra Benjamin."

"What?"

"Your bra Benjamin...the hundred you always keep stashed in there for emergencies."

"And what makes you think I have that on me?"

Zed rolled his eyes and gave her a look.

"Fine." She reached into her bra and pulled out the bill. "Should I expect to get that back?"

"Not a chance."

"Great plan so far, Zed. I'm not exactly rolling in cash these days, especially after this morning."

"Trust the process," he said, throwing her a wink. They walked up to the doors that were being watched by a very large man wearing a ski cap and a puffer coat.

"We're not open yet."

"I know. We're with the bands that are playing tonight. Would it be possible for us to go get a feel for the stage? You know make sure the acoustics sound right, plan out where we want to position everything before we start hauling the equipment out in this weather?"

The bouncer shrugged. "Sure," he grumbled as he stood up and unlocked the door for them.

"Ladies first," Zed smiled. As Addison walked in, he turned towards the bouncer holding out the hundred dollar bill. "Can you do me a solid and make sure no one else comes in?"

"I can only hold off the employees for so long." He said with a knowing smirk. He glanced down at his watch. "You've got thirty minutes."

"More than enough time," Zed said handing him the bill. He walked in and found Addison staring up at the darkened stage. He took her by the hand and led her up to the stage, positioning her in the very center. "I'll be right back," he whispered in her ear. "Don't move." He took off towards the access panels and flipped on the canned lights.

Addison flinched and shielded her eyes from the sudden brightness. "You could have warned me!"

"What? And miss the deer in the headlights look?"

"Ass."

"You know it," he laughed as he jumped back up onto the stage.

"So...other than taking my money and my vision, what's the plan?"

"It's simple. Sing."

"I told you...I can't."

"Yes. You can. Now face the front."

She did as she was instructed.

"Now just...sing..."

Addison sighed and turned around to look at him. "This is dumb. If I have a panic attack I'm going to kick your ass once I come out of it."

"You're not going to have a panic attack. And you definitely won't be kicking my ass."

"We'll see about that."

"Now turn back around. We only have thirty minutes."

Addison sighed dramatically and turned back towards the front of the stage. "What am I supposed to sing?"

"Something that's going to get your confidence up...let's keep it simple and go with a classic...if I remember right, Britney never failed you."

Addison let out a humorless laugh. "Great...now your going to ruin Brit for me."

"Addison...just sing."

"Fine..." She took a deep breath. In a quiet, shaky voice she started to sing. "Baby can't you see, I'm calling. A guy like you...should wear a warning. It's dangerous...I'm falling….There's no escape. I can't wait. I need a hit, baby get me it. You're dangerous. I'm loving it..." She took an unsteady breath, feeling the panic starting to rise. Before she could close her eyes, Zed's mouth was on her, kissing her neck and down her shoulder. His hands wrapping around her, roaming across the front of her body.

"Deep breath, Gorgeous. Don't stop..." he whispered in her ear before he bit down.

"With the taste of your lips, I'm on a ride. You're toxic, I'm slippin under. The taste of a poison paradise, I'm addicted to you don't you know that you're toxic...Taste of your lips…Taste of your lips...Taste of your..."

Zed spun her around quickly, capturing her lips in a deep kiss. His hands were everywhere. "Keep singing, Addison."

She moaned as his hand pushed against her center. "Too high, can't come down. Losing my head spinning round and round...Ahh Ahhh Ahhh Do you feel me now? Ahhh Ahh Ahh Ahhhh..."

He slid his hand into the waistband of her jeans, delving straight into hot wet center, never stopping the torrent of kisses across her body. He could feel her tightening around his fingers as he pushed them in and out of her. "I know you're close...Sing through it, Baby."

Her voice was louder, stronger even. "With the taste of your lips, I'm on a ride….You're toxic. With the taste of a poison paradise. I'm addicted to you don't you know that you're..." She took a deep breath, shattering as she sang out. "TOXIC!"

Carefully, Zed pulled his hand back out of her pants. "Addison...look at me." Her hooded eyes met his just as he placed his fingers into his mouth, sucking them clean. "I want you to remember this when you step on stage."

"I don't think one orgasm is going to cure me."

"No...but I'm willing to keep trying. I'll help you out before every single show if I have to."

Addison threw her head back and laughed. "I'm sure you would."

"I'm dead serious. It's a hard job...but I'm sure I can rise to the challenge," he whispered thrusting his hips against her.

"Zed… we shouldn't be doing this," she said running her hands up his chest. "No more illicit trysts."

"This isn't a tryst. This is purely therapeutic." He placed a hot kiss on her shoulder.

"Well, when you put it that way..." her hand moved lower to cup his hard bulge. "Why can't I stay away from you?"

"Because deep down you don't want to fight this either..."

"Just shut up and kiss me again..."

"Gladly, Baby..." he whispered as his hands went to her cold damp hair, pulling her in for a hard kiss.

They both pulled apart quickly when they heard voices approaching.

"Oh… There you two are," Bucky called out as he walked in with one of the bar managers. "We're about to start unloading equipment. What are you doing?"

Zed froze. Luckily Addison stepped up and spoke. "You said you wanted that song worked into the set, didn't you?"

Bucky nodded.

"Well, I explained to Zed why I didn't want to sing on stage."

"You did?" Bucky asked in shock.

"Yeah, he offered to help me find a way to get passed it."

"You did?" Bucky asked, this time looking at Zed.

Zed relaxed, thankful for her quick thinking. "Yeah… I think if we can work together some on stage without anyone else around, we can work through it."

Addison rolled her eyes. "I remain skeptical… but..." she smiled, "I'm willing to give it a try."

Bucky stared at her for a moment. "Seriously? You're really willing to try and get over it?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah, I mean Zed made a pretty convincing argument..."

Zed tried to hide his smile. "So, B… what do you say? You think Princess and I could get some private rehearsals in before shows?"

Bucky was grinning from ear to ear. He looked over to Addison and nodded. "If it gets you singing on stage, absolutely… Now come on, we've got a trailer to unload, and both of you need to grab jackets… Don't need anyone else getting fucking sick..." he mumbled as he walked away.

Addison turned to Zed mouthing the word "rain-check" before she jumped off the stage to help Bucky.

* * *

Zombies had just wrapped up their set, when Bucky ran over towards them all, looking a little rattled.

"I just found out management promised the local radio station an interview and a meet-and-greet after the show," he announced, patting his pockets for his cigarettes.

"You're shitting me?" Lacey asked in shock.

"Nope. Be on your best behavior, and let's do this!"

"Fuck yes! This is what rock and roll is all about!" Tracey exclaimed as he hugged Addison. "Let's go!"

"I'll be right there," she smiled. "I'm just going to grab another bottle of water."

"I'll see you back there!"

She stayed put as she watched them all walk towards the green room. "Looks like another rain-check..." she said quietly, knowing that Zed was still standing behind her.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and placed a soft kiss under her ear. "Good thing we have a long

drive tonight." He bit down on her earlobe, soothing the sting with his tongue.

A few minutes later, they were all set up in the green room. Bucky looked around and made a silent headcount. "Where's Stacey?"

"Asleep," Lacey said with a shrug. "She ducked out right after we were done. But… at least she made it through the set."

Bucky nodded and walked over towards the local deejay to get things started. After a short interview, the green room door opened and a flood of female fans entered the room. All of them ranging in age from about eighteen to twenty-five, and all of them heading straight towards Zed and Bonzo.

"Um… Where are the male fans?" Lacey asked looking over to Bucky.

A blonde bimbo slid up to Zed, snaking her arm around him, and posing for pictures. She was all tits and ass and hanging all over him. Heat seared up Addison's neck to her face. The flash went off. She didn't let go. Zed smiled and started to chat her up. Addison started over their way, ready to take her down. She suddenly stopped mid-step as the reality of the situation fully hit her. Zed doesn't belong to her. She took a deep breath and put a lid on her rage, reminding herself that they're not dating, they're not exclusive...they're just friends, and barely that, despite his declaration the other night.

Nobody could know that she was secretly jealous as hell- least of all, Lacey and Bucky.

She gritted her teeth and put on her best fake smile.

"I'm going to get a drink," she mumbled as she grabbed her stuff and exited the stage door towards the bar.

After scoring a few free drinks from the bartender and having him compliment her bass skills, she returned backstage to find the room empty. Well, almost empty.

She rolled her eyes and smiled before shutting them tight. "Ahhh! My eyes!" she called out teasingly.

She could hear Bucky and Eliza both curse as they jumped apart.

"Oh thank fuck it's just you," Bucky said, the relief clear in his voice as his chest still heaved.

"Honestly, you two… I'm scarred for life."

"Don't be a brat… we were just making out… I've had to witness much worse with you."

She bit back a laugh. "Where'd everybody else go?"

"Guess," Eliza said as she rolled her eyes.

"Fuck. The bus?"

"You got it… well, some of them at least. The rest went to the nearest strip club."

Addison put on her best apathetic expression while swallowing the bile climbing up her throat. "Just as well. I met a guy in the bar," she lied. "He wants to take me to his car for a quicky. I should only be gone for an hour. I'll be back in plenty of time before we need to get on the road."

"Really?" Bucky said looking over to her. "After what happened last night?"

She shrugged. "I've been through worse… still enjoy sex."

His face scrunched up in disgust. "I hope you have condoms."

"Nope."

He narrowed his eyes at her.

"I'm fucking with you, B. I'm always safe...lesson learned, remember."

"Not funny."

"It was a little funny..." She reached into her top and pulled out a condom, tossing it at him. "Same goes for you… Have fun." She turned on her heels and headed towards the exit.

The cold air hit her like a slap across the face as she scowled at the bus across the blacktop through the snow.

Even though her head urged her to forget about it, her heart had to know. She trudged over to the bus, her feet filled with the lead of dread.

When she finally made it, she hid in the shadows and listened.

"Yeah, baby, take it all..." a male voice growled over the muffled grunts that escaped through the window. Rhythmic banging accentuating their moans.

Zed suddenly appeared beside her and clamped his hand over her mouth to keep her from shrieking in surprise. He held his index finger over his lips and lead her by the hand to the back end of the bus.

"You thought I was in there," he grinned with that sexy smirk that turned her into a puddle.

"So what if you were?" she blew off the insinuation, even though she wanted to punch him.

He stepped into her personal space and guided her to the other side of the bus. There was a nice big wall there. No one could see them unless they came looking. Her pulse hammered in her veins.

"Jealous?"

"No."

"Liar."

She narrowed her eyes. "We are not having sex again until you promise me you're using condoms with the other chicks you fuck."

He held up his right hand. "If I fuck another woman, I swear I'll wear a condom."

"Or another guy..." she added, just to cover her bases.

He shook his head and smiled. "Or another guy."

"Who's on the bus?"

"Tracey..."

"Good for him..." Addison closed the gap between them. Her hands skating across his leather-covered shoulders. "Where'd your groupie go?"

"I called her an Uber."

"Why?"

"Not my type..."

She refused to read anything into his answer, but couldn't help the silent celebration in her mind. "Since when do you have a type? I thought a pulse was the only thing that mattered..."

He grabbed her open coattails and tugged her close enough to feel his rigid cock straining underneath his leather pants. His brown eyes flashed in the shadows. "Actually, my tastes have become rather singular as of late..."

"As of late?"

"Fine...my tastes have always been rather singular...she just wasn't around until recently..."

"I bet you tell all your hookups that..."

"Just you...always, just you..."

"So now I'm just a hookup?"

He rolled his eyes. "I told you how I feel the other night… You know I lo..."

She put her finger over his lips, cutting him off. "Don't… Please..."

He arched his brow and swirled his tongue over her finger.

She licked her bottom lip. "Trouble… Where were we earlier?"

"Hmm..." he smiled as his hands pulled up the hem of her tight skirt and cupped her pussy through her fishnet stockings. He smiled as he leaned down and bit her shoulder. "You're so fucking wet already." With a wicked smile playing on his lips, he grabbed onto her stockings and ripped them open. She let out a breathy moan as he guided her leg over his hip and slipped two fingers deep inside her.

"Fuck..."

He smiled against her lips before biting softly. He took a step away from her and unzipped his pants, freeing himself into the cold night.

Her eyes focused on his cock, her teeth biting into her lower lip as she watched him roll a condom down his length.

He could see how heavy she was breathing already. He lifted her and spun them around so that she was pressed up against the cold brick wall. Her legs wrapped around him and her hands ran through his hair, pulling him even closer to her as she licked along his jaw.

"Christ, I need you, Adds."

"Then I'm yours."

They both threw their heads back and moaned as he pushed into her slowly, savoring the feeling.

"Don't say shit like that if you don't mean it," he said through strained breath as she contracted the muscles inside of her, gripping him tightly as he entered her completely.

Her arms wrapped around him. "You were right..." she breathed. "I am sick of fighting… whatever this is between us."

He smiled as he slowly pulled nearly all the way out, and then slammed back in hard, making her scream out in ecstasy.

"No more fighting this?"

She bit her lip and shook her head before grabbing onto the back of his head and covering his mouth with her own.

He ran his tongue along hers, touching her, tasting her until they needed to pull apart for air. When they did, he looked into her crystal blue eyes, watching them darken and flicker and close slightly as he continued to pound into her. He kissed her again and then across her chin and up the line of her jaw towards her ear, biting down. "I get so lost inside your eyes..." he sang quietly.

Addison let out a soft giggle followed immediately by another moan as bit down on her neck.

"You don't have to say you love me  
You don't have to say nothing  
You don't have to say you're mine..." He grabbed her chin, making her focus on his eyes. He could feel the pressure starting to build in his stomach as it pressed against hers.

"Honey  
I'd walk through fire for you  
Just let me adore you..."

Her breath caught from both his words and the feel of him rotating his hips so that his pubic bone rubbed against her clit. "Zed..."

"Oh, honey  
I'd walk through fire for you  
Just let me adore you  
Like it's the only thing I'll ever do..."

She pulled his face back towards her, attacking his mouth once again.

The muscles in his legs contracted as he slammed repeatedly into her. The pressure continuing down his cock as she gripped and squeezed him with her pussy. "I'm so close, baby."

"I'm right there, too… You feel… so… fucking… good..." She bit down onto his shoulder as hard as possible sending them both over the edge.

Zed rested his forehead against hers as they both panted trying to catch their breath, wearing matching smiles as the snow gently started to fall around them.

"I knew it was only a matter of time before you two hooked up!"

Both of their heads snapped towards the side of the bus where Tracey was standing smoking a cigarette.

Addison rolled her eyes. "Um, Trace…" she called over to him. "Would you mind… just giving us a quick second to…" she motioned down to their lower halves.

"Like I haven't seen the both of you naked before." He let out a laugh and turned around.

Addison and Zed quickly straightened themselves out, stealing a quick kiss before they walked over towards him.

"Sooooo…," Zed said nervously.

Tracey turned around and smiled. "Relax, I told you I'd cover for you. You're secret is totally safe… God, you two are hot together…" He looked over to Addison and smiled even more. "If he doesn't help you get over your ex-boyfriend, I don't know what will."

Addison laughed nervously and looked over to Zed. "No more fighting this?"

He smiled and nodded.

"You asked me to trust you earlier, I'm asking you to do the same..."

"Wait...Adds! What are you doing?" Zed

whispered in a sudden panic.

"Wait! Zed knows your name?"

She turned back towards Tracey. "… Zed IS my ex."

"Addie!"

She looked back over to Zed. "We're going to need help if we're going to keep this from Bucky and Lacey. You have Bonzo!"

"Wait..." Tracey said as he stood there with a look of complete confusion. "Addie?..." His eyes opened wide as the realization hit like a sledgehammer. "Holy shit… the tattoo! You're not joking!"

Addison shook her head and smiled. "No… I'm not." She blew out a breath and flipped her lower lip down, showing him the matching one.

"Oh. My. God…."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****Storytime! I was stuck in traffic one day and Love Is Madness, by Thirty Seconds to Mars, came on the radio. I completely fell in love with it and started to think about how I could work it into the story I was writing at the time (Our Year/ Watch Us Shine). Obviously, it wasn't going to work. So that's where the whole original idea for this entire crazy twisted story came from. With all that being said, I hope you enjoyed the chapter!**

**If you're reading Watch Us Shine, I just want to say that it was a complete coincidence that Addison was in the hospital in both stories this week. I didn't think the chapters would line up like that… oops.**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**Love Is Madness- Thirty Seconds To Mars**

**Toxic- 2WEI (Yes, the version Milo danced to on DWTS)**

**Adore You- Harry Styles **


	25. The Perfect Drug

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

* * *

**Chapter 25**

**THE PERFECT DRUG**

_U need 2 register your pussy as a lethal weapon_

Addison giggled and as she read Zed's text. The last few weeks had been perfect. Stolen moments between and after sets, private "rehearsals" before shows, and hushed rendezvous' in one another's bunks at night. As long as neither of them mentioned the past, they were happy to blissfully ignore their problems. She looked across the bus catching his eye and smiling before quickly typing out a response.

_Why?_

_My balls need a fucking sling this morning._

_That bad?_

_That good! I needed that last night..._

She bit back a moan as memories of him feasting on her body the night before for Thanksgiving flashed through her mind. Bucky walked to the front of the bus, followed by Lacey and Stacey. "Gather 'round children. I have an announcement."

Addison slipped her phone back into her bra.

"Aww..." Tracey whispered next to her. "That was just getting good!"

She rolled her eyes and elbowed him, before leaning against his shoulder and cuddling up with him as Bucky continued.

"It seems like Christmas is coming a little early for you misfits this year..."

"What are you rambling on about?" Lacey said as she let out a bored yawn and sat down on the counter.

"How would you all feel if I told you that I've negotiated a tour extension..."

"Seriously?" Bonzo asked from his spot next to Zed.

"Seriously… an additional six months...but that's not the best part..." Bucky teased.

"What can be better than that?!" Tracey exclaimed.

"No more college towns and bars… I'm talking the small theater circuit, House of Blues, Fillmore, you name it!"

"No. Fucking. WAY!" Lacey shrieked with excitement launching herself off of the counter and tackling Bucky to the ground with a hug, as the rest of the room erupted in celebration.

"Um… guys..."

They all stopped and turned towards Stacey who was looking down at her feet, obviously trying to hold back tears.

"Stace? What's wrong?" Tracey asked as he let go of Addison and stood up.

"I… I was going to tell you guys when the tour ended… but now… with the tour being extended..." she wiped at her eyes. "I… I… I'm leaving the band."

"WHAT?!"

* * *

Zed slowly ran his hand through her hair as she rested against his bare chest. The low snoring of their band-mates asleep in the neighboring bunks and the steady sound of tires on the road filled the dark night.

"You know, I've dreamed of the day when I could watch Lacey cry as her world fell apart around her… but now that it comes with you having to leave the tour too… It's not nearly as enjoyable as I was hoping."

She sighed quietly, placing a kiss on his peck. "We'll figure it out… We have too..."

"Wait..." Zed whispered as he sat up a little and looked at her in the dark. "What about Mason?"

Addison's hand stilled on his chest. "Wha… What about him?"

"He could take over for Stacey! I mean, I'd probably have to keep my distance from him for a while, but..." he shrugged. "It'd be worth it to keep you on the tour. Does he still play?"

She let out a shaky breath. "Um… I don't really know," she whispered.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I haven't talked to him in a few years. I don't know if he's still playing or not."

"You haven't talked… years?… What? I thought you two were inseparable."

Addison took a deep breath, thankful for the cover of night. "Do you remember when I told you I didn't handle Daddy's death well?"

"Yeah."

"Well… I did a few things that I regret…" she buried her face into his chest, mumbling. "Mason was one of those."

"Wait..." Zed whispered sitting them both up in the tiny bunk. "You… and Mason…"

"Yes."

"… Had sex..."

"Yeah. Just once, but still… I couldn't face him after..."

He pursed his lips and nodded. "Sorry… just having a little difficulty comprehending this... I just..." he shook his head. "Mason is gay."

Addison sat up a little more. "Pardon?"

"Mason. Is. Gay." he repeated.

"Since when?"

"Well, I mean… I haven't seen him since he punched me in the mouth and knocked my tooth out, but..."

"HE DID WHAT?" Addison clamped her hand over her mouth, listening intently to make sure no one was awoken by her sudden outburst.

Zed laughed silently. "Yeah, you didn't know?"

"No… It never came up..."

"Yeah..." he flashed her a smile and pointed to one of his two front teeth, "that one's fake… Anyway, back to what I was saying… The last I knew, he was gay."

"I repeat… since when? Mason was one of my best friends from the time we were in diapers until I slept with him… I think I would have known."

"Well… I found out when we all got back from Cabo."

"Seriously?"

"Yup. He hooked up with one of the bartenders while we were down there."

"Really?"

Zed nodded. "Yeah. He was dating someone the summer after we graduated, but they broke up right after his birthday."

"Wait, he had a boyfriend?"

"Adds, you met him. Mason didn't introduce him as his boyfriend, but yeah..."

"I did?"

"Yeah… right before you decided to jump into the pool fully clothed."

She shook her head. "Fucking vodka..."

Zed's chest shook with silent laughter. "Good times."

"Wow..." she was quiet for a moment. "I can't believe he never told me… better yet, I can't believe he told you and not me! I mean… Come on! Out of all our friends, I was always the most open-minded! Hell! I'm the one that made YOU realize you weren't completely straight!"

Zed chuckled again. "Which is why Mase talked to me..." he let out a small sigh and kissed her. "I wonder what he's up to these days?"

Addison smiled against his lips. "He's doing quite well for himself, trust me."

"I thought you said you hadn't spoken to him in years?"

"Just because I haven't spoken to him, doesn't mean I've stopped watching out for him."

Zed stopped running his hand through her hair and pulled back to look at her. Even in the dark, she could see his brow arch up in question.

"He's one of Bamm!'s most sought after producers."

"HE'S WHAT?!" He clamped his hand over his own mouth as Addison silently laughed.

She nodded her head. "Yup… Daddy kind of took him under his wing and showed him the ropes. After..." she sighed and swallowed. "After Daddy died, I signed over his downtown LA studio to Mason..."

"Really?"

She nodded again before adding in an even quieter whisper. "He's also the only producer that I write for… he just doesn't know it's me."

"Wait… so let me get this straight… You set him up with a studio, and with hit songs?"

"Yes."

"And he doesn't know?"

She shook her head. "No..."

"Why?"

"Because I owed him. He helped me so much after..." she swallowed and closed her eyes to keep from saying too much. "He was there for me when I needed it. I mean, I technically control the majority of Bamm!. Anonymously encouraging a promising producer is the least I could do to repay him"

He surprised her by the intensity of his sudden kiss. "You are… so amazing."

She giggled against his lips. "Hardly… Wait!" she pulled back and looked him in the eyes. "That's it!"

"What is?"

"Bamm!" She pulled him to her and kissed him hard. "I think I just figured out how to save the tour!"

* * *

Addison shivered as she waited alone on the dark stage. The lights suddenly flashing on, blinding her. "Again?! Damnit Z! Can't you give a girl some warning?"

Zed laughed and jumped onto the stage to join her. "Oh, that never gets old."

"Ass."

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. "Yup..." He kissed her again before he pulled back to look at her. "You ready?"

She rolled her eyes. "Not really."

"You say that every time. You've only had one panic attack since we started this. I believe in you," he whispered as he pushed her hair behind her ears. He bent down and gently brushed his lips against hers. "I still can't believe you fixed everything."

She smiled and melted into his embrace. "It's a temporary fix. Just until Bucky and Lacey can find someone permanent."

"Seriously, though, Adds… lining up local studio musicians to fill in was pretty brilliant."

She shrugged. "Hopefully they find someone over Christmas break and we don't even need to use them, but… at least there's a plan in place."

"God, I adore you."

"I…" she let out a breath. "I think we should get some rehearsals in. What are we singing today?"

He kissed her again before turning her around so that she was facing forward.

"Mad World..."

She smiled and leaned back against his chest. "I love that song."

"I know… That's why we're singing it…" He kissed her cheek and started to sing.

"All around me are familiar faces

Worn out places, worn out faces

Bright and early for their daily races

Going nowhere, going nowhere"

She closed her eyes and took over the next verse.

"Their tears are filling up their glasses

No expression, no expression

Hide my head, I want to drown my sorrow

No tomorrow, no tomorrow"

"Open your eyes, Baby…" he whispered. "And I find it kinda funny, I find it kind of sad

The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had"

"I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take

When people run in circles it's a very very..."

"Mad world, mad world"

Addison let out a sigh and turned in his arms to face him. "This isn't working."

He pursed his lips deep in thought before breaking out in a large smile. "I've got it..." He jumped off the stage and started to take his clothes off.

"What are you doing?"

"They say the best way to get over stage fright is to imagine the audience naked… so…"

Addison shook her head, rolling her eyes. "Well, I can't let you suffer in this cold alone..." Slowly she started to unbutton her shirt as she continued to sing.

"Children waiting for the day they feel good

Happy Birthday, happy birthday

Made to feel the way that every child should

Sit and listen, sit and listen..."

With her shirt off, she slowly pushed down her jeans.

"Went to school and I was very nervous

No one knew me, no one knew me

Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson

Look right through me, look right through me..."

Zed bit his lip and climbed back onto the stage, stalking towards her until he could reach out and pull her into his arms. "You... look delicious. You should always wear black LaPerla..."

"How can I imagine the audience naked if you're up here?"

"We're changing directions..." he said as his hands grabbed onto her lace-covered ass.

"Oh really… how so?"

"You should just imagine me naked when we're on stage together..."

She smiled as their lips met. "I think I can manage that."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Zed slowly trailed his hand over the swell of her hip, his fingers tracing the large scar hidden under her colorful zombie bite tattoo. "You know… I happened to notice something..."

"And what would that be," she breathed out, still basking in the afterglow of their previous activities.

"Your tatts… they all seem to be covering scars."

She nodded her head. "Yeah..."

He lifted her wrist. "Are they all from cutting?"

"No." She pulled her wrist away and rubbed her thumb across the scar there. "I had the scars before I started cutting."

He sat up and gave her a questioning look. "What?"

"Yeah..."

"What the hell happened, Adds?"

"Z… I don't..."

He ran his hand down the side of her face, pulling her in for a kiss. "Please tell me… I lo..." he stopped himself and let out a deep breath. "I adore you… I'm just trying to know you again…"

She let out a sigh and looked into his eyes. "Fine… Most of them were from when I totaled the Ferrari."

"… Totaled the Ferrari?..." He pulled her to him and kissed her hard. "When? How? Did..." he was cut off by Addison kissing him again.

"Enough questions. You asked how I got the scars, I answered."

He softly laughed against her lips. "Fine… I know, no talking about the past." He sighed and held her close. "I'm sorry you got hurt, but it is kind of ironic that Addison 'I'm a great driver' Donnelly, got into a car accident, don't you think?"

"If I wasn't such a great driver I would have actually died… and I don't think you can call it an accident if you purposely drive off the side of the freeway going at least a hundred and thirty."

He pulled away with a serious look on his face. "Wait… you crashed your car… on purpose?"

"Yeah… Not my best moment, but..." she shrugged her shoulders.

He stood up abruptly and grabbed his pants. "Of all the fucking selfish, entitled shit you've done..."

"Excuse me?"

He glared at her, the fury clear in his eyes. "You know… I think you were right…This is a fucking mistake. We're done."

"Zed?"

He bent down and grabbed her clothes, throwing them at her before he stormed off, not giving her a second look.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"I've been up in the air

Out of my head

Stuck in a moment of emotion I've destroyed

Is this the end I feel?

Up in the air

Fucked up our life

All of the laws I've broken, loves that I've sacrificed

Is this the end?

I wrap my hands around your neck so tight with love, love

A thousand times I've tempted fate

A thousand times I've played this game

A thousand times that I have said today, today, today..."

Bonzo pulled the cord to Zed's guitar, disconnecting it from the amp. "What the fuck did you do?!" he whispered yelled.

Zed growled and stared daggers into him as he grabbed the cable from him and plugged back in.

"I've been up in the air

Lost in the night

I wouldn't trade it out for your lies you lost for my life

Is this the end

You were the love of my life, the darkness, the light

This is a portrait of the tortured you and I

Is this the, is this the, is this the end?

I wrap my hands around your neck so tight with love, love, love..."

Bonzo walked over to the wall and unplugged the small amp altogether. "Why did I just get a call from Bree saying that Addison is completely inconsolable! I thought you wanted this?!"

Zed growled and slipped his guitar strap from over his head. "That fucking selfish bitch crashed her car on purpose. She could have fucking died! She could have killed someone else! But do you think she cared? Of course not! It's just Addie being a fucking selfish, spoiled, inconsiderate..."

Bonzo held up his hands to stop him. "I think I get the picture..." he exhaled and sat down on the bench seat against the window. "Christ… I swear you two..." He pinched the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes.

"I'm fucking done, Bonz… I can forgive and forget a whole hell of a lot, but this..."

"Does she know?"

"What does it matter if she knows or not?!" Zed snapped. "It doesn't change the fact that she did it!"

Bonzo let out a breath. "Z… she was dealing with a lot. I'm not saying what she did was right, but maybe if you took the time to try and understand what she..."

"I've had to deal with shit too!" he yelled back, his chest heaving with anger. "You know what? I'm out of here… maybe I'll be back for the show..." He threw his guitar towards Bonzo and flung the door open, storming off the bus.

* * *

2 WEEKS LATER

As Zombies walked off the stage, Bucky grabbed Zed by the front of his straight jacket and pulled him down towards him. "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT NECRODOPOLUS?!"

Zed grabbed Bucky's wrists and pushed him off. "Fuck off Bucky."

"Real nice, Z. You completely fuck up yet another entire set, and the only thing you have to say is 'Fuck off'?!"

Zed rolled his eyes and walked off towards a group of awaiting female fans.

Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose. "Bonzo..."

"Yeah?"

"Zombies is opening until he sorts his shit out… And I swear to Christ is he's using again..."

"He's not. I'll fix this!"

"You better! I'm not fucking around!"

Bonzo sighed and nodded his head as Bucky walked off towards the green room. He stood there for a moment before heading towards the rooftop in search of the one person he knew could get through to Zed.

"Hey… I thought I'd find you up here." Bonzo said softly as he sat down next to her in the snow.

"Hey. Did you get that flight change?" Addison asked as she took a drag of her cigarette.

He nodded his head. "Yup. Sure did. We're now both heading out to LAX on the red-eye December 23rd."

She gave him a soft smile. "I'm glad you're spending the break with Bree. I promise I'll try not to be too much of a third wheel."

He rolled his eyes and draped his arm around her. "You know I didn't come up here to talk about Christmas break..."

"You didn't?"

"Look… Zed is going to be pissed at me for telling you this, but, whatevs… It's been two fucking weeks..." He grabbed Addison's cigarette and took a deep drag. "Maybe if you knew why he reacted the way he did, you two can finally talk this through, and he can quit being more of a colossal asshole than he normally is…"

Addison grabbed her cigarette back from him. "There's nothing to talk about Bonz. He used me to get off a few times and then tossed me aside like I meant nothing. It's not the first time it's happened. I should have expected it. Besides… he seems to be enjoying himself."

"Damnit! I'm so tired of you two doing this shit! You guys are fucking endgame! You're both just too fucking stubborn to figure everything out! I swear to fucking Christ..." he closed his eyes and exhaled loudly. "Back when Zed was in Julliard…" he paused, trying to find the best way to tell her. "It was right before Thanksgiving break. His mom was driving cross country to surprise him, attempt to cheer him up… She was side-swiped by a tractor-trailer."

Addison gasped, her cigarette falling out of her mouth, landing on her leg. "SHIT!" She quickly swatted it off and exhaled.

"Her car spun and she ended up hitting a sound wall."

"Oh my god..."

Bonzo nodded. "She was pronounced dead at the scene."

Addison couldn't help the tears from falling. "I had no idea… I loved Zyla..."

"I know Z was really close with her..."

"She was amazing… Everything a mom should be..."

Bonzo wrapped his arm around her and held her as she cried. "After the accident, his pops disowned him. Completely cut him off. Told him never to contact him or his sister again..."

"He always was a grade-A asshole," she sniffled into his shoulder.

"That's why Z joined the army… and why he dropped Jacobs." He looked down and brushed the hair away that was clinging to the wet tear trails down her face. "Like I said, you two need to talk. You both have been through hell and back. You both deserve a happy ending."

* * *

1 WEEK LATER

The crowd was cheering for more as Tracey walked over to Addison.

"Are you sure you're ready for this?" he whispered as low as he could over the noise surrounding them.

It had been nearly three weeks since Zed had walked away from her. She had tried to talk to him, she tried to text, she tried to call. Nothing. He'd completely shut her out. This was her last attempt to try to get his attention. She let out a shaky breath and slowly nodded her head.

"Alright, doll-face… Let's do this. If you can't pick up the verse, I'll cover. No pressure." Tracey began to pluck out the melody of the song that Addison had been working on for the last week as he stepped up to the microphone.

"Watch me, take a good thing and fuck it all up in one night

Catch me, I'm the one on the run away from the headlights

No sleep, up all week wasting time with people I don't like

I think something's fucking wrong with me

Drown myself in alcohol, that shit never helps at all

I might say some stupid things tonight when you pick up this call

I've been hearing silence on the other side for way too long

I can taste it on my tongue, I can tell that somethings wrong but

I guess it's just my life and I can take it if I wanna

But I cannot hide in hills of California

Because these hills have eyes, and I got paranoia

I hurt myself sometimes, is that too scary for you?..."

Addison looked to the side of the stage. She nearly gasped when she found him staring at her. His eyes on fire.

"Watch me, take a good thing and fuck it all up in one night

Catch me, I'm the one on the run away from the headlights

No sleep, up all week wasting time with people I don't like

I think that something's fucking wrong with me..." Tracey looked over to Addison and gave her an encouraging smile.

She nodded and stepped up to the mic, closing her eyes.

"Roll me up and smoke me, love

And we can fly into the night

Roll me up and smoke me, love

And we can fly into the night

You take drugs to let go

And figure it all out on your own

Take drugs on gravestones

To figure it all out on your own"

She opened her eyes and looked back over, but Zed was gone. She ignored the enthusiastic thumbs up from Bucky and sighed. She had tried. She closed her eyes and swallowed back the tears that were threatening to fall. Bonzo was wrong. They weren't endgame. They were just the perfect drug. The highs were pure bliss that they endlessly chased, but the comedown… it was worse than any addiction she had ever kicked. It left you bruised and battered and gasping for air. She exhaled and opened her eyes. A look of determination on her face. If he could forget her again, then she could do the same.

"Watch me, take a good thing and fuck it all up in one night

Catch me, I'm the one on the run away from the headlights

No sleep, up all week wasting time with people I don't like

I think that something's fucking wrong with me..."

As the crowd cheered on, Tracey ran over and hugged her, lifting her off the ground. "You did it! We are so fucking celebrating tonight!"

Lacey pushed past them rolling her eyes.

Addison ignored her and smiled up at Tracey. "Sounds perfect… I'm in the mood for chaos."

ZZZZZZZZZ

"Tequila and Perrier, Honey-Bunny?" Tracey asked as they made their way through the crowded strip-club over towards the bar. "My treat!"

She nodded her head. "In that case, I'll take two."

"You got it!" He stepped up to the bar and flagged down the bartender.

"Tracey?" A voice called from behind them.

Tracey spun around as the voice registered. "OH. MY. GOD!" The need to order drinks suddenly forgotten as he squealed and embraced a tall raven-haired man. "Alex! What the shit are you doing here?"

"Same thing as you. Touring."

"I had no idea Banshee was even on tour!"

"Yeah, we hit the road last month..." his gaze moved to Tracey's left, noticing Addison for the first time. "Who's your friend?"

Tracey palmed his forehead and laughed. "Sorry, I swear I keep forgetting that she hasn't always been in the band." He turned and looked at her. "Alex, this is Add... I mean, Casey. She replaced Macey as our bassist… Princess, this is Alex, he's the lead singer and guitarist for Banshee."

Alex still hadn't broken eye contact with her as he stepped forward and took her outstretched hand placing a kiss on the top. "Pleasure to meet you." He flashed her a panty-dropping smile. "I have to say Trace… you guys certainly upgraded."

Tracey laughed and draped his arm around Addison. "You have NO idea… Is the rest of the band around?"

"They sure are. You guys wanna join us? I know Jonathan would LOVE to see you again, Trace."

Tracey giggled excitedly and looked over to Addison, silently asking for her thoughts.

She leaned in closer to whisper in his ear, "Single?"

Tracey nodded.

She smiled and nodded. "He'll do."

An hour and several drinks later, Tracey was making out with Jonathan while Addison was sitting on Alex's lap laughing as he and his bandmates regaled her of tails of their exploits coming up on the New York music scene.

"Oh my god!" Alex laughed, "There was this one time when we were playing at CBGB and all of a sudden this massive brawl breaks out in the middle of our set..."

Jason, the drummer for Banshee, laughed and clinked his glass against Alex's. "Zombies were set to play after us that night," he laughed. "So naturally, Zed and Bonzo were right in the middle of it all."

"That's only because Z caused the fight in the first place," Tracey added as he briefly came up for air.

"Did I hear my name?"

They all looked up to see Zed standing next to them.

"ZED!" The members of Banshee all greeted out in unison.

"Dude! Pull up a fucking chair! Where's everyone else?"

Zed drug a chair over from the neighboring table and sat down. "Getting drinks. I thought I recognized you," he said motioning over to Jason. "But then I spotted Princess's hair, and thought there was no way she'd be hanging out with you losers..." He glanced in her direction and narrowed his eyes.

Alex's hand wrapped possessively around her. "I have to say, Z… I don't know how you're surviving touring with this hot thing on the same bus as you."

Before Zed could respond, Bonzo, Eliza, and Bucky walked up to the table.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"I need a refill!" Addison giggled over the loud pulsing music as she pulled away from Alex's lips.

"Need me to get you one?" he asked, his hand grabbing onto her ass under her skirt.

She giggled and kissed him again, shaking her head. "No… I'll be right back." She stumbled off of him and straightened her skirt, blowing him a kiss as she walked off.

She was almost to the bar when a leather blockade stopped her paces. Zed. He grabbed her wrist and ushered her around the corner, pushing her against the wall with his lips.

She promptly dissolved into the wood before suddenly remembering her anger towards him. She reached up to shove him away, but her traitorous hands wound around his shoulders instead.

He interrupted his torrent of kisses, mumbling against her lips, "Stay away from him."

"Fuck you," she mumbled back. Normally she'd resent a man telling her what to do, especially where other guys were concerned, but Zed's jealousy tripped her pride trigger. "I'll do whatever the fuck I want with whomever the fuck I want. Just like you do with your groupies and strippers."

He pulled away and nailed her with a stare. "They bore me."

"Yeah? You haven't looked very bored lately."

"Are you jealous?"

"Not at all," she lied.

He shot a glance left, then right. He pressed his cock against her hip. "Well, I am. And if I see you with another guy again, I'm going to beat the living hell out of them. You don't want me to resort to violence, do you?" His gravely voice shooting waves of desire through her, but his words wrapping around her heart. He did still want her.

"Don't tell me who I can or can't be with." The words came out of her mouth, but internally she was screaming the opposite.

He dipped closer and brushed her mouth with his. "How about if I ask real nice?"

"How about you give me a reason not to be with anybody else… You're the one who's been ignoring me again. I've been trying to talk to you..."

The rock-star persona bullshit dropped with a thud, and a brief air of truth filled the space between them. He pinned her with his warm brown eyes. "Why can't I stop loving you…"

She released a long breath, her hands came to rest on his chest as her pretenses dropped as well. Twenty million questions demanding his immediate attention ran through her mind, but in her drunken state, she asked the one she shouldn't have. "What the hell are we doing, Z?… It's the same song and dance over and over. We fight, we avoid, we ignore until one of us snaps and we end up having crazy-kinky hot-as-hell sex… And now, here we are again… and..."

He curled his finger and thumb pulling up her chin, the look on his face silencing her. "I wish all it took was a few groupies and strippers to get you out of my head… God knows I've been trying to do it for years."

A Lords of Acid song bit into the speakers, and everyone in the club ran over towards the main stage where some featured dancer was doing her thing.

A predatory smirk spread across Zed's face as he glanced over towards the occupied crowd. Without saying a word, he grabbed her hand and lead her twenty feet to the bathroom. A few dudes stood around the urinals, but no one looked twice as he dragged her by the skirt waistband into a handicap stall and slammed the door shut.

Her hands moved on instinct, unhooking his belt, unzipping his jeans, and stroking his ready and willing cock. Low, staccato bass notes rattled the walls. She smiled, hoping the music would be loud enough to cover the gasps and moans she planned on doing a lot of. He was worse than any drug, and she was jonesing for another hit.

Before she could get on her knees to bow before the altar of Zed's glorious dick and praise it with her mouth, he hefted her to the steel handle running parallel to the floor. It wasn't nearly deep enough to support her, so she dropped a stiletto foot to the toilet seat and used that to help her balance on the bar. He lifted her skirt and dropped to his knees, ripping the lace that covered her.

"Those are expensive you know..." she moaned out as his tongue rolled around her sensitive nub making her scream out almost instantly.

She combed her fingers through his sweat-dried hair, loving the feel of its softness mixed with the hard tugs on her clit. He sucked her loudly, hungrily. Thanks to her precarious position, she could barely move, which may have been his intention all along.

"I don't want to come yet, Zed. Not until you fill me with your cock." Even as she whispered the words, she pushed his mouth hard against her wet cunt, trying again to thrust her stationary hips, to no avail.

She put her foot down, dragging his beautiful face to hers. She licked herself off his mouth, nice and slow so he could watch her and think about it. He parted his lips enough for her to lap the insides too. She stared into his eyes, "Mmm… I taste good on your mouth… almost as good as I taste on your dick."

"I fucking crave your taste, Baby."

She fondled his stiffy and used it to sop up a hearty helping of all-natural lube from her dripping muff. She spread it over the head of his cock with her thumb and chased it with her lips. She groaned around her mouthful, savoring the delicacy. After only a minute of playtime, he pulled away, giving her a heated look.

She resumed her position on the bar, spreading her legs as wide as they'd go in the cramped space. He rolled a condom down his length and in one swift move, buried himself inside of her. He drove in and out, slow and steady.

Her arms snaked around his neck, as she tilted her head to enjoy the view as bliss diffused through his face. In that nasty-ass strip club bathroom full of pissing dudes and possible rogue ejaculators, Zed kissed her like she was his lifeline.

"I wish things could be different..." he whispered a little breathlessly.

Addison licked the edge of his ear. "Me too."

His slowing thrusts matching their current mood. He clamped a palm to her jaw and traced the line of her lower lip with his tongue, making it even more difficult for her to concentrate. The metal walls of the stall clanked a solid, steady beat as he continued to fuck her. His eyes glazed over as he pumped in and out once more, filling the condom. His smile did her in. Devotion, adoration, and love. Her whole universe coming into sharp focus as she came around him staring into his hypnotic brown eyes.

She dissolved into his arms, his mouth, his everything. Her head spinning like a whirligig. Her heart screaming for her to give in to the high and tell him she loved him. She stroked his rough cheek instead.

Someone banged on the door. "Hey, how long you gonna be in there? I gotta drop a deuce really bad."

"Way to kill a moment, Dickie McDoucherson." She waved her middle finger over the top of the stall.

"Hey, somebody's banging a chick in there," a voice says. Laughter following.

Zed pulled away, stuffing his softening dick back into his pants.

Addison sighed. She wanted more than this. She wanted cuddling and post-coital binge eating and spooning. She wanted to wake up beside him in the morning and start all over. Fuck screwing in bathroom stalls and behind the tour bus. She was tired of sneaking around.

The main door opened. Loud music seeping in.

"Zed? You in here?" Bucky's voice calls out.

The guys on the other side snickered. "I don't know what his name is, but some dude is getting lucky in there."

"Sounds like something he'd do..." Bucky tapped on the metal door, attempting to peek through the cracks.

Zed put his back to the door and held her in front of him, away from view. "Fuck off."

"Nice to see your vocabulary is still stunted… Hurry up and cum already. We need to get back to the bus and I still have to find Casey."

The main bathroom door opened and closed a couple more times. They both waited a full minute before moving. Addison was pretty sure she was holding her breath the entire time.

"You go out first. Make sure the coast is clear," she whispered. "I'll come out in a bit. Do whatever you have to do to get Bucky away from here."

He nodded and pecked the soft spot behind her ear as he let out a sigh. He laid a panty-wringer of a kiss on her before pushing her away, the same look of disgust that had been present for weeks was back, sobering her up instantly. "You're worse than fucking heroin." He opened the stall door and walked out. The slaps of palms bounced off mirrors and tile, and roars of appreciative laughter barreled between the guys out there.

"Hey, you're the singer for Zombies," one of the dudes said. "I'll bet you got a got a hot piece of ass, huh?"

"Yeah, Zombies… You wanna meet the band?" Zed replied.

"They're here? Hell yeah, man!"

The voices trailed off, and the door closed again. Addison waited a few minutes, trying to keep the tears from spilling. More people coming in and going out. When it's mostly quiet, she snuck to the door, looked both ways, and got the hell out of Dodge.

She had just made the corner when she came face to face with Tracey. "You had sex with Zed again."

"What? No. Why would I…? No."

"You totally did."

Blinking tears back slowly, she nodded.

"Oh, Addie-Caddie..." He shook his head and pulled her into a hug.

* * *

December 22nd. The last show before the holiday break, and their last show with Stacey. Addison zipped up the last of her bags and dragged them to the front of the bus.

"Has anyone seen Zed?" Bucky called out from the door.

Addison looked around. "I haven't seen him since last night."

"I swear to fucking christ..." he mumbled as the door slammed shut.

"Still a no-show?" Tracey asked as he brought his own bags up to the front.

"Apparently." She glanced down at her watch. "They go on in thirty minutes."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Where the fuck have you been!" Bucky screamed as Zed waltzed into the green room less than ten minutes before Zombies was set to take the stage.

Zed ignored him and started to get changed into his usual stage attire.

"Hello… I asked you a fucking question!"

Zed rolled his eyes and pulled his straight jacket over his head, heading back towards the door. "I don't have time for this shit… I've got a show to do."

Bucky blocked his way. "You know… I was really starting to think you were better than I gave you credit for… But now..." He shook his head. "I suggest you take the next couple weeks and straighten your shit out."

"Fuck off..." Zed pushed past Bucky and headed towards the stage.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"We can never be friends!"

The sound of Zed's low gravely growl into the mic made Addison's head snap up and over towards the stage.

"Holy shit..." Stacey laughed. "He actually showed up."

"I hate that I saw you again last night

You were with somebody and so was I

Met you in the bathroom at 12:05

And I fucked you again

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah..."

Addison bit her lip as hard as she could. The pain and anger in his voice cutting her to the core.

"I'm not myself

I'm not myself when you're around, no

Can't be helped

We are insane, that's just the way it goes

I'm a demon in the night

She's an angel with the white

Told me keep on all the lights

I'ma show you what you like..."

She grabbed onto Tracey's hand and squeezed.

"I hate that I saw you again last night

You were with somebody and so was I

Met you in the bathroom at 12:05

And I fucked you again

We can never be friends, yeah, yeah, yeah..."

Her breaths were coming out in pants as she tried to keep her tears at bay.

"I couldn't cry

I need to smoke, I'm feeling sick inside

From seein' you next to a friend of mine..."

"Fucking asshole..." Tracey muttered as he stood up pulling her away from the side of the stage, ignoring the looks from Bucky, Stacey, and Lacey as they walked past. He kicked open the rear exit and dragged her outside into the snowy night. He pulled her into a hug, and let her cry into his shoulder. "Look at me, Addison..."

She sniffled and looked up at him through tears.

"I know this sucks. But we've got one last show before the break. You are ten times the musician he will ever be. So..." he wiped at her smeared mascara with the pads of his thumbs and gave her an encouraging smile. "Forget about him for one night. Be a badass rocker bitch and lets fucking send Stacey off with a show she'll never forget."

She nodded her head and hugged him. "You're right… Tonight's about Stacey."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"To Stacey..." Lacey called out over the loud club music as she held up her vodka martini. "You've been an Acey since the very beginning and you always will be… Even though we're going to miss you and your insane beats more than anything, we wish you nothing but the best in the future...You are going to be impossible to replace!"

"To Stacey!" The rest of them called out, lifting their own drinks in the air.

Stacey wiped at her eyes. "You guys..." she shook her head and gave them a small smile. "I'm going to miss you so fucking much..."

"I just wish my idiot bandmates had the decency to come out and see you off, too," Eliza said as she hugged the other drummer.

Stacey shrugged. "Maybe it's for the best..."

Over the next couple hours, they all said their goodbyes, leaving as their various departure times approached.

Addison was outside smoking a cigarette when Bucky walked out.

"You going to be okay?" he asked as he took her cigarette from her to light his own.

Addison rolled her eyes. "Damnit, Bartholomew… ask me one more time," she threatened under her breath as she took hers back.

He let out a soft laugh. "Fine… but if your bitch of a mother gives you too much shit, call me."

"I will. Tell the fam I said Merry Christmas."

"I will."

"Oh, and have fun with Eliza," she whispered with a wink.

"Fully plan to… I'll see you in a couple of weeks Addie-loo." He pulled her into a hug. "Merry Christmas, Sis."

About an hour later, Addison was the last one left. She was sitting at the bar when she heard her name.

"Addison…"

She turned to see Bonzo sitting down next to her. "Hey!" she said hugging him. "I thought you weren't coming out?"

He ran his hand nervously through his hair. "I'm not."

She arched her brow and motioned around. "Um… you kind of are..."

"Have you seen Zed?"

Addison rolled her eyes and tipped her drink back finishing it off. "Nope. And I don't fucking care where he is either. Now if you'll excuse me… I still have…" she glanced down at her watch. "Four hours before we need to leave for the airport, and I intend to be very drunk."

"Bullshit."

She turned her body fully towards him. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. I know you care. Which is why I'm trusting you with this."

"Bonzo, what the hell are you talking about?"

"I think Zed's using again."

"What? What do you mean?"

"He's been clean for a while, but lately he just hasn't been himself. He's been disappearing, he's moodier than normal, he's barely talking to anyone… We were supposed to hang out until we needed to leave for the airport, but he never showed."

"Bonzo..." Addison grabbed onto the collar of his jacket and pulled him down so that he was eye level with her. "What do you mean, 'using'?"

"Heroin…"

The empty glass she was holding hit the ground, shattering.

"Addison, if he's using again..." he let out a sigh and shook his head. "I can't leave for two weeks without knowing if he's okay or not."

"Fuck… Are you really worried?"

Bonzo nodded his head.

She let go of his lapel and took off towards the exit, pulling out her phone.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"The more I give to you the more I die

And I want you

And I want you…"

He tied the tourniquet around his arm, holding it tight with his teeth as his veins became visible.

"You are the perfect drug

You make me hard when I'm all soft inside

I see the truth when I'm all stupid-eyes

The arrow goes straight through my heart

Without you, everything just falls apart..."

He punctured his skin with the needle.

"My blood wants to say hello to you

My soul is so afraid to realize

How very little there is left of me

And I want you..."

He pushed down on the plunger.

"You are the perfect drug..."

As a feeling of pure bliss washed over him, he leaned his head against the wall of the small bathroom. Images of ice blue eyes, and snow white-haired pulling him under.

"Without you, everything falls apart

It's not as much fun to pick up the pieces..."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"It says he's on the bus," Addison said as they made their way back over to where the bus was parked.

"I told you, I already looked there!"

"Well, the tracking info says he's on the bus, so that's where we're starting..." She flung the door open and walked up the steps. "This is not how I wanted to spend my last few hours..." she mumbled. "Zed?"

"Zed! Are you in here?" Bonzo called out as he and Addison walked through the hall of the bus between the bunks.

She dialed his number and waited for it to start ringing.

_A-way, way down inside_

_A-honey you need-ah _

_I'm gonna give you my love, ah _

_I'm gonna give you my love, ah oh _

_Whole lotta love…_

Addison smiled to herself as they followed the sound. "He still has our ringtone..." She knocked on the bathroom door. "Zed…" She tried to open the door, but it was locked. "Zed… I don't care if you want to talk to me or not, but Bonzo is out here and worried sick about you, so stop being an ass and open up." She rattled it a few more times. "Bonz..."

"I'm on it..." he took a running start and slammed into the door, breaking the latch and stumbling inside, tripping on something on the floor.

"Well that was a bit extreme..." she mumbled under her breath as she took a step in to help Bonzo up. Her foot hit something making her look down. "ZED!"

Tears sprung to her eyes as she saw him lying on the floor, a needle still visible in his arm. She dropped to her knees by his side, Bonzo doing the same. Instincts kicked in and she moved her hair away from her ear and rested it against his chest. "He's still breathing… it's weak but..." she jumped to her feet. "Pull the needle out and untie the tourniquet!" she ordered as she ran out the room. Less than a minute later she was back. She dropped down next to him again, re-positioning him so that his head was resting in her lap. She quickly assembled a glass vile into an atomizer.

"Where the hell did you find Narcan?"

She pushed the button up administering a dose of spray into Zed's right nostril and then repeating the action in the other.

"Bucky's bunk."

"How did you know he'd have it?!"

She didn't take her eyes off of Zed. "He's had it since I joined the tour."

"Wait, what?!"

She let out a sigh of relief as Zed's breaths became deeper. "I think he's going to be okay… but we need to get him to a hospital!"

"We can't… If B finds out, Zed's off the tour."

She sighed and nodded her head, knowing a little too well where her brother stood on serious drug use. "Call Bree."

"What? Why?"

"Are you going to question everything?!" She closed her eyes and let out a breath. "I'm sorry… I'm just trying not to panic. I need you to call Bree because we're supposed to be staying with her for the next two weeks. Z's going to need someone with him 24/7 who can help him through withdrawals… and since a hospital is out of the question and I can't send him to rehab without setting off a hundred different fucking alarms... he's coming with us to LA." She pulled her phone out of her bra and quickly started to type out a text.

"Are you texting her or should I..."

Addison rolled her eyes. "I'm making new travel arrangements… We can't exactly fly commercial."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Miss Donnelly! It's such a pleasure to see you again!"

"Nancy," she smiled sweetly. "I'm sorry about the short notice."

"Oh, don't be silly, sweet girl. We're always happy to see you..." the older flight attendant's attention was drawn over to Bonzo who was helping Zed up the stairs. "Oh my… is that… Mr. Jacobs?"

Addison let out a sigh. "Yup… It's a loooong story…" she lowered her voice as she added, "one my brother does not need to know."

Nancy nodded in understanding as Addison helped Bonzo get Zed situated on the long bench seat against the windows.

Addison sat next to him and placed his head in her lap, soothingly running her fingers through his emerald green hair as the flight crew prepared for take-off.

"Oh thank fuck..." Bonzo mumbled pulling his phone out of his pocket and bringing it to his ear. "Hey, Babe..." he cringed and looked over to Addison. "Um… hold on..." he put the phone on speaker and held it out. "Okay…"

Bree's voice filled the cabin. "Addison Megan Donnelly! What the fuck is going on?!"

Addison huffed out a breath. "Hi, Bree."

"Don't you 'Hi Bree' me! Start talking!"

"Zed overdosed. We're on the Donnelly jet about to take off… you know, the usual..."

They could hear Bree sighing. "Adds… You know I love you, and I'd do anything for you..."

"Why do I feel a 'but' coming?"

"But… My family decided to come early! They're already here and driving me fucking nuts. I can't have someone detoxing in the middle of fucking forced family Christmas time!"

"Fuck..."

"Can you stay at a hotel? You're going to be at the Beverly Hills Hotel for Christmas Eve anyway. Can't you just get a room?"

"No…. You know my idiot step-brother sees my expenses. He'd ask too many questions… It's the same reason I'm not bringing Z directly to Rise Rehab Center in Malibu."

"What about the hou…."

"I'm not going to the house."

"Adds… It makes the most sense and you know it. It's close enough so that if anything does happen, the best doctors around are only minutes away. I can head over to the house and open everything up, and I'll help you however I can."

Addison was quiet for a few moments as she weighed her options. She looked down at Zed, still asleep in her lap. With a heavy sigh, she nodded her head. "Fine. We'll text you when we land…"

Bonzo took the phone off of speaker and continued his conversation with Bree as Addison started to run her fingers through Zed's hair once again.

"Never thought you'd make me perspire

Never thought I'd do you the same

Never thought I'd fill with desire

Never thought I'd feel so ashamed..." she whispered as the engines became louder.

"Me and the dragon can chase all the pain away

So before I end my day remember

My sweet prince you are the one

My sweet prince

You are the one..."

"So…," Bonzo said as he hung up the phone, interrupting her whispered serenade. "Care to start explaining?"

"What's there to explain?"

"Hmm... why you knew what to do when Z od'd? Why did Bucky start carrying Narcan when you joined the tour? Why you and Bree seem to know about a rehab center in Malibu? Shall I continue?"

"Not particularly..." she mumbled, not taking her eyes off Zed. "But, we've got a long flight, and I know you're just going to ask Bree when you see her… So... you might as well hear it from me." She took a deep breath and let it out. "Zed wouldn't be the first client Bucky has represented that's overdosed."

"What? I thought Lacey was Bucky's first client."

Addison shook her head. "Nope. Bucky was my manager before he moved back to New York."

"Well, that explains how he got you on the tour so fast after Macey got the boot."

"Yeah, he might have called and reminded me that I owed him one..."

"I'm guessing that 'one' has something to do with your knowledge of Narcan?"

She nodded her head. "Among other things..." she sighed again before she continued. "About a year after Z left, B put me through rehab in Paris for a nasty cocaine habit… It was hell, and I swore I'd never touch the stuff again and I put all my focus on my album… but … but then my daddy passed away and I relapsed, except coke wasn't cutting it anymore. So I moved onto H…"

"Jesus."

"Yeah… It escalated pretty quickly… Nobody had heard from me in months… until I drove my car off the side of the freeway. When I got out of the hospital, Bucky flew me directly back to Malibu and checked me into Rise… So, needless to say, I know what Z's going through, and what he's about to go through in the next week."

Bonzo shook his head and smirked. "You know… Bucky never left his side when he detoxed last time… I didn't know he had previous experience."

Addison sadly smiled. "I usually just joke with him that being my manager prepared him for any possible scenario he would encounter." She sighed and leaned her head back against the cold window. "But in all seriousness… Bucky saved my life… Multiple times. Coming on the tour was the least I could do for him."

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

"Holy shit…," Bonzo muttered under his breath as they pulled up to the gates of Addison's father's house in Malibu. "Z wasn't fucking kidding."

"You get used to it," Addison mumbled under her breath as she punched in the access code. She could feel the panic starting to rise as they drove down the drive towards the house.

"Hey..." Bonz said softly, leaning forward from the back seat to rest a hand on her arm. "You going to be okay?"

She put the car in park and turned to look at Zed still asleep on the back seat. She took a deep breath and nodded her head. "Yeah… he's worth it."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I really wanted to get this chapter out BEFORE Christmas, but… oh well, better late than never! Whew... That was a roller coaster and a half to write! Let me know what you think!**

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**Mad World- The Riverdale Season 2 version**

**Up in The Air- Thirty Seconds To Mars**

**I think I'm Okay- Machine Gun Kelly **

**Why are you Here- Machine Gun Kelly **

**Perfect Drug- Nine Inch Nails**

**My Sweet Prince- Placebo **


	26. Apocalypse

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

* * *

**Chapter 26**

**APOCALYPSE**

December 23rd

Addison was sitting in the middle of the den surrounded by piles of mail and boxes when Bonzo trudged down the stairs.

"Morning..." he muttered groggily.

"Afternoon," she smirked as she cut open one of the larger boxes.

Bonzo plopped down on the large white sofa behind her. "What the hell are you doing?"

She sighed and set down the box cutter. "I haven't been here in years. All this shit has been piling up..." She opened the box and pulled out a large plaque.

"Holy shit..."

"What?" Addison asked turning to look at him.

"That's a fucking platinum record."

She nodded her head. "Yes…"

"How are you that chill about this! That's a fucking Coldplay Platinum Record!"

Addison smiled. "Sorry, Bonz. Did you notice the décor in this place?"

"No… I was too busy trying to lug Z upstairs when we got here, and I don't think my eyes fully opened until about thirty seconds ago when you pulled that thing out… Speaking of Zed..."

"He's okay. He's been out of it, but his breathing is fine. You can tell he's in some pretty serious pain, though. He was tossing and turning and completely drenched in sweat..."

Bonzo rubbed the heels of his hands over his eyes and then ran his hands through his hair. "If I didn't know he's going through hell, I'd beat the shit out of him…" he sighed. "Did you sleep at all?"

"No… I came down about twenty minutes ago when Bree called. She's on her way over with groceries."

Bonzo smiled at the sound of her name.

"Oh, you have got it bad," Addison teased, throwing a handful of packing peanuts at him.

He laughed and brushed them off. "You're one to talk."

"That's..." she sighed heavily. "… that's different."

"Shit, Adds..." he slid off the couch and joined her on the floor. "I didn't mean to upset you."

She waved him off. "It's fine…" she shrugged her shoulders and gave him a sad smile before returning her attention to the package she had just opened. She cursed under her breath.

"What?"

"They're going to think I'm an asshole for not sending a fucking thank-you note when this thing arrived."

"I doubt anyone expects you to personally acknowledge every artist your dad worked with."

"You're right. But this one was sent to me. Not my dad… Read the inscription."

"To our muse, Addison. This song would have never been without you." He looked back to her with a confused look.

"I was on a bender in London. I decided to stop by the studio and visit my Uncle Chris, fell asleep on the couch… When I woke up they had written and recorded 'Paradise'," she shrugged.

His jaw dropped open. "Uncle Chris? As in Chris Martin?"

She nodded her head. "Yup. He's not actually my uncle… but he was married to my Godmother."

"Gwyneth Paltrow?"

She nodded her head again.

"Your fucking Godparents are Gwyneth Paltrow and Slash?!"

"Yes, they are. One picked by my mother and the other by my father."

Bonzo shook his head in amazement. "You know, hearing Z tell stories of your insane life is one thing… Hearing them from the source is way more mind-blowing."

_I kissed a girl and I liked it_

Addison rolled her eyes. "I hate that fucking ringtone."

_The taste of her cherr…_

"Hey, are you here?…" She rolled her eyes. "I swear you'd forget your birthday if it wasn't written down." She stood up and walked over to the control panel on the wall. "See you in a sec." She hung up the phone and laughed silently. "Bree's pulling up now."

* * *

_Zed yawned and stretched his arms as he sat up in bed. His muscles still felt tight, but after a few days rest, his cold symptoms seemed to finally be gone. He glanced at the clock on the nightstand, it was already well into the afternoon. He silently let out a string of curses. Addison would be in play rehearsals by now. He started to reach for his phone to send her an apology text, but the sounds of giggling coming from somewhere in the apartment caught his attention. _

"_Now this is where most people mess up," his mother said. "You cannot mix the noodles and sauce over heat."_

"_No heat?"_

_Zed smiled to himself as the voices grew louder the closer he got to the kitchen. Addison must have skipped rehearsals to check on him. _

"_Nope. Don't do it. The residual heat from the noodles is what sets the eggs to create the perfect velvety texture."_

"_So do I just... turn off the heat then?"_

"_No. Completely take it off the burner before you mix in the egg and cheese." _

_He peeked around the corner to find his girlfriend pouring in the contents of a mixing bowl into a large pot while his mother looked on. _

"_Slowly… You want to keep the pasta moving…"_

"_Like this?" Addison asked, not taking her eyes off of the pot._

"_Perfect. As soon as the pasta is evenly coated, it's ready to go."_

_Addison put the tongs down and smiled. "I can't believe I just cooked!"_

_Zyla wrapped her up in a tight hug. "You sure did, sweet girl!"_

_Zed's jaw dropped open. In just a month, Addison had managed what none of his former girlfriends ever had. She had won over his mother. _

"_I can't wait for Zed to try it!" She suddenly looked nervous. "I hope he likes it..."_

_Zyla softly laughed. "If there's one thing I know, it's that my son loves Pasta Carbonara. Trust me. He'll love it."_

_Zed cleared his throat, letting his presence be known. _

_They both turned towards him and laughed. _

"_And just how long have you been standing there, Zeddy?" his mom teased. _

"_Long enough to know that my amazing mom just taught my amazing girlfriend how to cook my favorite meal!" He walked over to the stove and hugged them both. "By the way, it smells like heaven in here."_

_Zyla jumped a little as her phone vibrated in her pocket. "Shoot..." she said pulling it out. "I'm on call… I've got to take this." She ruffled her son's hair and smiled at him as she walked out of the room. _

"_You seem to be feeling better," Addison whispered, wrapping her arms around his waist as he leaned down to kiss her._

"_How could I not be? I've got kisses and Carbonara." He smacked a loud kiss on her lips, making her giggle. _

"_Wanna try it?" she asked in a shy voice. Very off-brand for the confident force of nature she usually was. _

"_Baby," he said softly, running his fingers through her long golden hair. "You skipped play rehearsals, came over while I'm sick and hung out with my mom, and learned to cook my favorite dish on the planet… Of course, I want to try it!" _

_She giggled as he pulled away from her and grabbed a fork, twirling it in the pot and scooping up a heap of noodles, shoving it into his mouth. _

_His eyes rolled back as he moaned around the fork. "MMMmmmm…." _

_Addison bit her lip at the sound. _

_He swallowed and licked his lips._

"_Sooo…." _

_He pulled her to him and kissed her. "Don't you dare repeat this, but I think that was better than when my mom makes it… God, I adore you," he breathed against her lips. _

_She rolled her eyes playfully and pushed him away just as Zyla walked back into the kitchen. _

"_I have to go into the hospital… are you going to be okay, Zeddy?"_

"_Mom, I'll be fine. I'm feeling much better."_

"_Okay," she said skeptically as she felt his forehead. She hugged him and kissed his cheek. "Addison, I had such a great afternoon with you. Don't be a stranger, dear."_

"_I had a great afternoon too. Thank you so much for the cooking lesson, Mrs. Jacobs."_

_Zyla wrapped her in a hug and smiled. "It was my pleasure… and please, call me Zyla." She pulled away and looked back at her son. "Walk me out?"_

"_Sure thing." He threw Addison a wink and walked out of the kitchen with his Mom._

"_I like her. She's such a nice girl. Well mannered, and polite, and just an absolute delight… So much better than the last girl you dated… So be on your best behavior."Zyla said quietly as she picked up her purse and keys._

"_I promise I will be the perfect gentleman."_

_She pinched his cheek. "I have a feeling about this one."_

_Zed rolled his eyes and laughed. "Not another mom-tuition."_

"_Laugh all you want, but when have I ever been wrong? You two…" she sighed as a smile lit up her face. "There's something there."_

_He sighed and opened the door. "Have a good shift, Mom."_

"_I love you, make sure you get some more rest."_

"_I will. Love you, too."_

_Addison was just finishing drying a mixing bowl when he walked back into the kitchen. _

"_You look so hot doing that."_

_She shook her head and placed it back in the cabinet. "Zed… I'm always hot."_

"_Too true..." he walked over to her and picked her up, sitting her on the counter. His hands running up the outside of her legs and under the hem of her pastel pink dress. "I missed you the last couple of days."_

_She ran her fingers through his hair. "I missed you too… I'm glad you're feeling better."_

_His nose skimmed down the side of her cheek. "Me too." His fingertips traced along the edge of her panties. He nipped her chin."You know, I just promised my mom that I'd be on my best behavior… but you're making me want to do very un-gentlemanly things to you."_

"_It would be very un-gentlemanly for you not to fuck me," she gasped out as his fingers brushed across her center._

_He let out a soft laugh. "Such language..." He kissed her, biting her bottom lip, "And she thinks you're well-mannered… good thing you don't have to pretend anymore." _

_She reached for the drawstring of his gray joggers and pulled the tie undone. "If your mother knew all of the things that we do..."_

_He grasped the delicate lace covering her and ripped. "She'd keep me so far away from you…" _

"_God are you trouble."_

"_You know you love it." He picked her up, wrapping her legs around his waist, and carried her into his bedroom._

* * *

Addison sat on the edge of the bed and dabbed a cool washcloth across his forehead, hoping to alleviate some of his discomforts. He had been tossing and turning restlessly, mumbling in his sleep. As she moved the washcloth down to his cheek, his eyes started to blink open.

"Baby?" His voice was quiet but shaky.

"Hey," she whispered back with a soft smile.

"What did I do to deserve this?" He let out a breathy sigh, his eyes closing again. "Heaven."

She brushed his emerald hair away from his forehead. "What?"

"I'm back in your bed with you, the smell of Carbonara in the air… This has to be heaven..."

She let out a quiet giggle. "Malibu, yes. Heaven, no. But, I did make you pasta… If you think your stomach can handle it."

He sat up a little and looked around. "I'm not dead?… We're really here?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah. Bonz and I flew you out here early this morning… Nancy says hi..."

He could see the tears starting to form in her eyes. How many of her tears was he responsible for? Suddenly, his entire world came into sharp focus. She was and would always be the love of his life. He needed her like he needed oxygen. If he wasn't already nauseous from heroin withdrawals, the memory of the things he had said to her and the way he treated her would have made him sick. He let out a shaky breath and reached out to caress her cheek. "Adds… I'm so sorry."

She held his hand against her face and closed her eyes, cherishing his touch.

"The way I've been acting, the way I treated you, the things I said… For shooting up again. I'm sorry for all of it."

"You don't need to apologize Z. We've both done stupid shit. I'm just glad we found you in time… If anything ever happened to you..." She bit her lip to keep from crying.

"Come here, beautiful..." he whispered, pulling her down so that she was lying with him.

"I should be giving you space… I know you're in pain," she protested, trying to sit back up.

He shook his head and held her tighter. "My muscles might be screaming like I ran back to back marathons in the desert, but having you in my arms makes it better. Stay… Please?"

She nodded her head and nuzzled into the crook of his arm.

* * *

December 24th

Addison tossed the remote over to Bonzo. "I think I have officially reached my Christmas Special limit." She stood up from the couch and stretched.

"You literally watched only one," he teased.

"One more than normal," she shrugged. "I prefer the classics, like The Nightmare Before Christmas."

"That's a Halloween movie, you weirdo. Rudolph is a classic. "

"It's a Halloween/Christmas movie… and it's the greatest Holiday movie ever animated."

Bonzo rolled his eyes. "I swear you sound like Z..." he mumbled.

"Speaking of whom… I'm going to go check on him."

"I'll come with." He stood up and cracked his back. "I need to grab my charger from upstairs anyway."

Addison shrugged and started for the stairs.

When they cleared the landing for the second floor, Bonzo huffed out a sigh. "How did you deal with having to climb all these fucking steps every freakin' day. And how are you doing it now in those heels? Why are you even wearing heels, to begin with?!"

She laughed and rolled her eyes, looking down at the Loubiton's on her feet. "Cut me some slack, I missed my shoes… and climbing all these steps in heels gave me a great ass."

"True..."

"I'm sure Bree would love to know you've checked it out."

"Adds, your bunk is above mine. Seeing your ass on an almost daily basis is an occupational hazard," he teased. "Especially when you're sneaking in an out of it in the middle of the night."

She stopped and turned to look at him. "You knew?"

"Duh… Again, your bunk is immediately above mine. I knew when Zed was in there too."

She gave him an apologetic smile and giggled. "Ooops."

Bonzo shrugged. "Again, occupational hazard..." he said as they continued up to the third floor.

Addison turned the knob and opened the door as slowly and quietly as she could. The night before had been another rough one for Zed. He had alternated between shaking and sweating all night. Each temperature change bringing on a fresh wave of nausea. She had done her best to keep him comfortable, but neither of them had gotten much sleep. She tip-toed over to the bed. A light sheen of sweat covered his face. She very carefully pulled the gray comforter down to help cool him off. She stood there for a moment, watching him sleep. Despite the messy history and the heartache, she knew she'd do anything for him. She leaned down and brushed a soft kiss to the top of his head. "...Forever and after..."

"How's he doing?" Bonzo whispered from the doorway.

Addison stood back up and walked over to the door, ushering him into the hall. "Sleeping at least."

"Well, that's a good thing."

"Yeah..." She sighed, her eyes wandering, landing on the door to her music room. Suddenly all she wanted to do was play. Music had always been her salvation and at that moment, she desperately needed it. "Bonz..."

"Yeah?"

"Feel up for rehearsing?"

"Hell yeah!"

She smiled and walked to the door of her music room, opening it up. "Let's go then."

Bonzo's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open as he stepped in and looked around. "Holy fucking shit… This is like a wet dream come to life."

Addison giggled, running her fingers over the top of her black baby grand piano that stood in the center of the room. She walked over to the shutter doors and opened them wide, inhaling the cool salty air that wafted in. A strange sense of peace that she hadn't felt in a long time washing over her. She shook her head and smiled before turning around to pick up a bass guitar from the wall. Bonzo was still marveling at the various instruments around the room as she plugged into the amplifier cabinet. She closed her eyes and let the music flow through her. Her fingers struggling to keep up with the notes she was imagining.

"You are not a bassist."

She opened her eyes to see Bonzo standing in front of her with a large smile on his face.

"Pardon? I'm pretty sure I play bass, so..."

He chuckled and held up his hand. "That's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?"

"That riff was a lead guitarist pretending to play a bass line if I have ever heard one." He laughed almost nervously. "It was incredible… will you teach it to me?"

She smiled, nodding her head. "Grab a bass."

Within an hour they had worked out a bass line more complex and emotionally raw than either of them had ever heard. Bonzo sat on the edge of the piano seat in awe. "That was..." he shook his head at a loss for words.

"Think you can handle it by yourself?"

He looked up as she switched out her bass for a pink Les Paul guitar. He nodded and jumped to his feet, his fingers plucking out the start of the bass line. After the fourth eight count, Addison cut in with a loud wailing power cord slowly dragging out on the whammy bar before breaking out into a full-on assault of frenetic notes.

They were both lost in the music. It wasn't until the addition of a second guitar, that they even opened their eyes. They both stopped playing.

"Don't stop on my account."

Addison's mouth ran dry. Guitar sitting at waist level, his bare chest on full display. She bit her lip and closed her eyes, trying to keep it together. She let out a sharp exhale and opened her eyes. "… I didn't mean to wake you."

"Adds, it's fine. That was fucking amazing… And you…" he let out a breathy sigh. "Seeing you like that was well worth the wake-up."

She smiled almost shyly as she walked over to him. "How are you feeling?"

"Well enough to join in… if you'll let me."

The way he was looking at her set her insides on fire. She slowly nodded her head.

"Fuck yes!" Bonzo called out as he started again.

With Addison on lead and Zed on rhythm, the two guitarists engaged in a chaotic, sensual audio dance. Back and forth, the music flowed between them effortlessly. The sexual tension was palpable. When the last chord was finally struck. They were both panting and breathless. They stared into each other's eyes, their chests heaving for oxygen. Zed licked along the inside of his bottom lip, making her bite hers.

"Unholy fucking hell..." Bonzo exhaled as he collapsed into the chair by the window, effectively breaking the spell between them. "That was a goddamn religious fucking experience."

Zed exhaled slowly and nodded his head. "Yeah…" he caught Addison's eye again and smiled. "God, I've fucking missed playing with you."

"I swear if you weren't an Acey I'd be on my knees begging you to be in Zombies," Bonzo laughed. He let out a breath and ran his hands through his hair. "We have got to play that on the road. Can you imagine how unbelievable that would sound with Eliza thrown in the mix?!"

"Have at it," Addison laughed. "Lord knows we don't have enough testosterone in The Acey's to pull it off."

Zed's arms ached with the need to reach out and grab her, pull her to him and kiss her until they both ran out of oxygen. They had always had insane physical chemistry, but he had almost forgotten how much making music together amplified those feelings. The sight of her with her eyes closed, playing whatever melody that she imagined, executing it flawlessly… He didn't have the words. She was a rock goddess. He closed his eyes and clenched his fists, trying to calm the torrent of emotions running through him.

"Z… you okay?"

He nodded his head slowly. "I just need a minute." The feel of her hands on his tense shoulders making him jump.

"We need to get you back in bed."

* * *

Bonzo let out a low whistle as Addison walked out of her closet decked out in an emerald green velvet dress.

She rolled her eyes and held her finger up to her lips, reminding him to be quiet.

"Hells bells..." Zed rasped out.

She sighed and walked over to the bed. "You, mister, are supposed to be asleep." She ran her hand down his cheek. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I'm going through heroin withdrawals."

She rolled her eyes. "Well, you're looking better," she whispered, her thumb gently tracing one of the dark circles under his eyes.

"And you look delicious…" his eyes followed the plunging neckline of her dress. "Gucci?"

She smiled and bit her lip, nodding her head.

"Delicious?" Bonzo chuckled from the chair in the corner. "I would have said hot."

"She's always hot..." Zed said, still not taking his eyes off her.

"Are you saying I'm not always delicious?" she teased playfully.

"You know you are."

She blushed from the heated look he gave her. "Trouble..." she whispered low enough for only him to hear.

He gave her a small smile. "Where are you heading, Gorgeous?"

"The Beverly Hills Hotel."

"You still do Christmas Eve dinner with your mom?"

She nodded her head. "Whether I want to or not." She ran her hand through his hair before standing up and straightening her dress. "I just texted Bree the gate code for the one-hundred-four-thousand-fortieth time. She should be here soon… try to stay out of trouble."

"Aww..." he said right before letting out a loud yawn. "But, that's my name."

She rolled her eyes and tried not to smile. "Boy do I know it..." She waved goodbye to Bonzo and walked out the door.

Bonzo waited until he heard the clicking of her heels on the stairway before he spoke. "Well, you two seem to be getting along quite nicely."

Zed sat up and pulled his right arm across his body, stretching. "I don't know if it's the near-death experience, or just being here surrounded by a thousand memories, but..." he shook his head and looked over to him. "Everything feels just so much more." He sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "That probably doesn't even make sense..."

Bonzo stood up and walked over to the bed. "In some strange way, it does. I've definitely noticed a difference in her."

Zed's stomach growled loudly. "Any chance you left me any Carbonara?"

"Yeah," Bonzo said with a laugh. "Adds threatened me with bodily harm if I touched the leftovers… for someone so small, she sure can be scary."

Zed stood up, cracking his back. "She can back it up too. You don't want to be on the receiving end of a low kick, or a punch… Trust me."

Two hours later they both sat on the couch in the front room. Zed rubbing his full stomach while Bonzo flipped through the channels on the television.

"A Christmas Story?"

"Pass."

Bonzo rolled his eyes. "Dude, it's Christmas Eve… you can't pass on every fucking Christmas movie."

"I just prefer the classics," he shrugged. "Like Nightmare Before Chris..." A pillow to the face cut him off.

"I had the exact same argument with Addie this morning! It's a Halloween movie!"

Zed laughed. "Dude, Nightmare Before Christmas is the best Holiday movie ever animated."

"SHE SAID THAT TOO!"

"That's because she has great taste in movies."

Bonzo rolled his eyes. "Right… fucking weirdos… both of you."

Zed pushed him playfully and stood up, stretching his aching muscles once again. As he turned towards the windows overlooking the pool, he noticed all the boxes stacked up against them. "What the shit is all that?"

Bonzo followed his gaze. "Oh, mail and crap that's been piling up. Adds was going through it yesterday morning… speaking of which… Did you know that Coldplay's Paradise was written about her?"

Zed's shook his head and smiled. "That song always did make me think of her for some reason…" he shrugged his shoulders. "Not surprised it actually is about her."

"How are you not? We know someone who inspired a fucking Coldplay song!"

Zed laughed and patted his friend's head sympathetically. "I know buddy… It's a lot to process. But… it's not the first song she inspired."

"Dude, I'm not talking about the ones you write."

"Neither am I."

Bonzo sat up a little straighter. "Wait… What?"

"Yeah," he said as he continued to stretch. "Back in high school, there was actually this whole on-going thing where people would try to guess which songs were about her."

"Like what?"

"Hmm… let's see…" Zed mumbled, running his hands over his face. "Um…" he let out a soft laugh. "Well, the first one off the top of my head is 'I Kissed a Girl' by Katie Perry… Just don't ever bring that one up around her."

Bonzo bit back a laugh. "Okay, so many questions."

"Do you remember me telling you about our graduation party?"

"Yeah."

"Well… I may have left out the part where Adds and KP made out in the pool."

"No fucking way."

"Way," he laughed. "Um, let's see… what else... Celebrity Skin by Hole. Courtney Love got the idea when her daughter and Adds were giving her a makeover while she was passed out."

"Addison knows Frances Bean? And more importantly, Courtney Fucking Love?!"

"Dude… simmer down."

Bonzo pulled at the ends of his hair. "How the fuck are you so chill about this?!"

"Wanna know something that will really blow your mind?"

"What could possibly be more mind-blowing?"

"Your ass is currently sitting on the same sofa that your favorite band sat on."

Bonzo quickly jumped to his feet and stared at the cushion. "Are you fucking serious? Green Day?!"

"Yeah, man. Great guys."

Bonzo dropped to his knees and kissed the couch. "This is the most amazing this ever..."

"I mean, I also screwed my girlfriend seven ways to Sunday on numerous occasions right there as well, but..."

Bonzo quickly brushed off his lips. "Not cool, Dude… Now I'm not even going to want to sit there."

Zed laughed and rolled his eyes. "We've crossed swords on the regular Bonz… I'd think you'd be cool with sitting on a couch where I've had sex."

"But this is different. It's Addison. She's like a sister."

"Well, if that's how you feel," he shrugged. "Good luck sitting anywhere in this house. Including her step-brothers bed your sleeping in."

"What is wrong with you two?" Bonzo laughed.

Zed shrugged again and walked over to the wall that housed the master recording player. "We were great together..." He flipped up the control panel.

"What are you doing?"

"This is where Dale used to preview his latest recordings… this one isn't labeled though, caught my eye..."

Bonzo walked over and looked at the machine. "That's some pulp fiction looking equipment right there. I thought everything was digital now?"

"He preferred to lay everything down old school and then transfer it. Sounds better." He pressed the playback button. A soft guitar melody filled the air.

_Think of me when you're out, when you're out there_

"Fuck me..." Zed whispered as Addison's voice registered.

_I'll beg you nice from my knees_

"Is this Adds?" Bonzo asked?

_And when the world treats you way too fairly _

_Well it's a shame I'm a dream _

Zed nodded his head, slowly backing away from the tape player.

_All I wanted was you _

A heavy guitar riff cut through just as his calves hit the couch. He sat down in shocked silence.

_All I wanted was you…_

"Damn, this is raw."

Zed shot Bonzo a glare.

"Shutting up, now..." he said locking his lips.

_...I could follow you to the beginning _

_And just to relive the start _

"What are you two doing?!" Bree asked as she rushed into the room, heading straight to the tape player and turning it off.

Zed growled.

"Bree, please?" Bonzo asked motioning over towards Zed.

She rolled her eyes. "Fine… Addie is going to be pissed..." She hit play.

_And maybe then we'll remember to slow down _

_At all of our favorite parts_

_All I wanted was you_

_All I wanted was you _

_All I wanted was you _

_All I wanted was you _

_All I wanted was you_

Bree pressed stop again and turned to look at him.

Zed had tears in his eyes. "I don't… I don't understand…" He wiped his nose. "The pain. The heartache..." he took a trembling breath and met her eyes. "She broke up with me. Why would she write something like that..."

Bree sighed and sat down on the couch next to him. "Z… the entire album was about you."

"There's more?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah, that was just the first track… God, I remember her and Mase arguing for days about putting that one first..."

"I need to hear the rest."

"Z..." She looked over his head to Bonzo for support. He shrugged his shoulders. With a heavy sigh, she stood back up and pressed play.

Forty-two minutes. That's how long he sat on the couch and listened to her pour her heart out through the most beautifully gut-wrenching songs he had ever heard. Each track cutting him deeper and deeper. He wiped his eyes and stood up. Without saying a word, he walked upstairs. He headed straight to the ensuite bathroom in Addison's room and started to throw up.

"Zed, man… you okay?" Bonzo called from the other side of the door.

"No, I'm not fucking okay!" he managed to get out between dry-heaves.

Bonzo opened the door and walked in, kneeling beside him. "Bree and I were talking… We think there's something you need to see."

Zed rested his head against the wall of the bathroom. "I don't think I can handle anything else..."

"With Adds out the house it might be the only time."

He let out a breath and stood up, walking over to the sink to rinse his mouth out. "Fine..."

They walked out to find Bree standing by Addison's closet.

"Zed… I need to ask you something, and I need you to be completely honest with me…. Did you cheat on Addison the night of your going away party?"

He shook his head. "No… I didn't." He pulled out his phone and pulled something up before handing it to her.

She gasped, covering her mouth.

"Now do you believe me?"

She nodded her head. "Addie didn't break up with you..."

His head snapped up. "What? Bree, I got the fucking letter! Hell…" he stormed over to his bag and pulled out his dog tags. "She mailed me back her locket!"

"I know what it looks like. But I'd think you of all people would understand that things aren't always what they seem. Especially after what you just showed me on your phone."

"Bree… I'm hanging on by a very short thread right now."

"I know… that's why you need to see this." She opened Addison's closet door. "I started to piece everything together when I visited back in September," she said as she walked in and went to the back wall where Addison kept her safe. "0-3-0-9..." she said softly, punching in the code.

"Since when do you memorize numbers?" Zed asked, sitting down on the bench behind her.

"This one's a hard date to forget. Even for me..." she mumbled as she opened the safe and pulled out a stack of papers.

"What's all that?" Bonzo asked sitting down next to Zed.

Bree smiled and stood up, handing Zed a few pictures from the top. "Well, that's the mock-up of her album artwork… Not what I'm looking for, but I thought you'd enjoy it."

He looked at the pictures in his hand. "Holy, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph..." He held up the picture of Addison naked with only a guitar covering her. "How in the hell did she convince Dale to green-light this?"

"I'd buy it just for the cover..." Bonzo laughed.

Bree elbowed him and rolled her eyes. "It tested the best… obviously." She discreetly moved a few other pictures to the bottom of the stack before smiling victoriously. "Yes!" She handed over a worn-out envelope and sighed. "Here you go..."

"What is this?"

"You read it and tell me."

He carefully opened the envelope and pulled out a single sheet of paper. From the softness and it's crinkled edges and smears, he could tell it had been handled quite a lot. He unfolded the sheet and started to read.

Bree and Bonzo watched as confusion and then anger crossed his face.

"I didn't send this..." he whispered with quiet rage. His hands shook as he held the paper.

"Everything in this is a goddamn lie! I never cared about her last name, or what I could get from her! All I ever wanted was her. She's the love of my fucking life!" He closed his eyes as more tears fell.

"If you didn't write the letter she got, then isn't it possible that Addison didn't write the one you got?"

"None of this makes sense."

"Obviously, someone was trying to keep you two apart."

Anger flashed across his eyes once more. "I know exactly who it fucking was!"

The sound of the front door opening caught all their attention.

"Shit! Give me that!" Bree said taking the envelope from him and putting it back in the safe. She shooed them out of the closet and had them sit around the room just as Addison opened the bedroom door.

The second he saw her, the rage boiling inside of him calmed and clarity took hold. Everything keeping them apart wasn't real. The pain, the heartache, none of it was their doing. With that out of the way… his chest filled with a sudden burst of joy… they could be together again.

"Hey… what are yall up too?"

"I was just… uh..." Bree stammered.

"I just woke back up and Bonz and Bree were discussing their plans for tonight."

Addison didn't look convinced but nodded her head anyway, too emotionally exhausted to deal with whatever was really going on. "Whatever… I'm going to..." she pointed to her ensuite bathroom and shrugged, walking off.

Bree followed after her. "Hey..." she said softly. "You okay?"

Addison nodded, but a singular tear falling from her eye gave her away.

"Adds." Bree pulled her into a hug. "Jesus, you're freezing."

Loud full-body sobs escaped her as she hugged her best friend. "It's just dinner… with my mother..." she struggled to get out. "And then I went… to see… Penny..."

"Oh, Addie… Shhhh… I've got you."

A soft knock on the door pulled their attention. Zed opened the door. "Is everything..."

Addison pulled back and wiped her eyes. "I'll be fine..." she put on a fake smile. "I always am, right?"

Bree pulled her back in for another hug. "How about I stay tonight… we can watch whatever scary-ass Christmas themed horror movie you want, I'll bake brownies…."

Addison wiped her eyes again and gave her a small smile. "No. I'll be okay. You and Bonzo go and enjoy midnight mass with your family." Her voice cracked as a fresh round of tears started to fall.

"Girl, I will totally cancel on all of them. You know you're more important… NO OFFENSE BONZ!" she called out.

"NONE TAKEN."

"I'll take care of her," Zed said as he walked over to them. He pulled on Addison's shoulder until she let go of Bree and let him hold her. "Besides, the last time we all watched Black Christmas together, you didn't sleep for three days, B."

Addison laughed through her tears at her best friend's expense.

"Ha. Ha. Ha..." She stroked Addison's hair and looked up at Zed. "Are you even in any shape to be taking care of anyone?"

"I don't need anyone taking care of me, fuck you very much," Addison sniffled, still clinging to Zed, her mascara staining his shirt.

Bree rolled her eyes. "All right then…I guess I'm going to head out." She looked up and met Zed's eyes, mouthing _Talk._

He nodded his head as he wrapped his arms tighter around Addison.

"I'll see you guys tomorrow."

Zed held her tight as she cried. He didn't know what had made her so upset, but he knew he'd do anything he could to take the pain away. Slowly he started to sway them side to side.

"I, I can't get these memories out of my mind..." he whispered, placing a soft kiss on the top of her head as they slowly started to dance to the music that flowed between them.

"Some kind of madness has started to evolve."

She smiled against his shoulder, melting into his embrace even further.

"I, I tried so hard to let you go

But some kind of madness is swallowing me whole

I have finally seen then light

And I have finally realized

What you mean..."

His hand traced down her arm. Their fingers joined as he slowly spun her under his arm and then pulled her back into him.

"And when I look back at all the crazy fights we had

Like some kind of madness was taking control

And now I have finally seen the light

And I have finally realized

What you need..."

Her eyes glistened in the soft lights as she looked up at him. His chest tightened and his breath caught. Their gentle swaying stopped.

"Come to me,

Trust in your dream

Come on and rescue me..."

He wiped away her tears, slowly leaning down, resting his forehead on hers.

"Yes I know, I can be wrong

Maybe I'm too headstrong..."

She smiled as his thumb ran down her cheek, pulling her face closer to his.

"Our love is

Madness..." he whispered as their lips brushed together.

A slow burn ignited in them both as their lips parted and their kiss deepened.

"Addison..." Her name fell from his lips like a soft prayer. He smiled and kissed her again. "Have you ever been up to the Hollywood sign?"

She pulled back, her eyes narrowing in silent question. The Hollywood sign was their special place. The place they'd go when they wanted to get away from the hustle and bustle of life. A place where they could talk about anything and everything. A place where they could just be together.

He leaned back in and kissed the tip of her nose. "Let's go for a drive."

She nodded her head slowly. "Okay… Let me grab my keys."

* * *

"A Volvo? Well, that's surprising..."

She nodded her head as she clicked the button on the remote to start the car. "Yup… my brother picked it out. I believe the words he used were 'safer than a bank vault'."

Zed shrugged and nodded his head as he opened the passenger side door and got in.

Addison clicked her seat belt and looked over to him. "Are you sure you're up for an hour-long car ride?"

He took her hand and brought it to his mouth, placing a kiss on the top. "I'm sure…" he looked up and met her eyes. "I think it's time we talked."

An hour and twenty-two minutes later, Addison pulled over on a familiar path and put the car in park.

"Z..." she said softly, shaking his shoulder. "We're here."

His eyes blinked open. "Fuck..." he whispered groggily. "I didn't mean to fall asleep."

She shook her head and smiled. "Z, it's fine. You should be in bed sleeping while you can before the insomnia kicks back in."

He stretched his aching arms and yawned. "Still… I feel like shit for falling asleep on you." He yawned again and looked around. "It's raining?"

"Yup. Started about twenty minutes ago," she sighed.

"Damn. I was hoping we could take a walk… maybe climb up the 'H'."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Oh, the memories..."

"We sure do have some great ones."

"Yes, we do..."

He reached out and rubbed his thumb across her hand. The air between them charged as their eyes met.

"We should talk..." he whispered leaning closer to her, licking his lower lip.

"Talk..." she nodded, pulling his mouth roughly to hers. "Definitely."

Teeth clashed and tongues slid together. Everything unfolded rather quickly after that. His hands were everywhere at once, cupping her and squeezing her, pulling her over the center console so she was in his lap. She hiked up her long dress and straddled him, pulling his shirt up and off, throwing it into the backseat. He shifted underneath her pushing his straining erection against her hot center. Her body was shaking, screaming for more contact as her dress came off.

Time seemed to suddenly standstill as the moonlight hit her alabaster skin. "Beautiful..." he whispered. He looked up and met her eyes. He wanted her. He needed her. But he knew they needed to talk more. He closed his eyes, taking a breath to try to clear his head. "Adds…"

"What's wrong?" she asked breathlessly.

"I… I didn't mail you that letter."

She pulled away. "What?"

"The letter, breaking up with you. I didn't write it. I would have never said those things."

"But… But... you cheated on me..." she whispered.

"No… I didn't."

"But I saw you!"

"Addison, I swear… It was a setup. All of it. The cheating, the letter. Everything."

"This doesn't make any sense… I saw you with that girl!… I have the fucking letter!" She yelled.

"And I got a letter from you saying that you were just using me to piss off your parents!"

"Bullshit!"

"It's the truth! How else would I have this?" He held up his dog tags, showing her the locket that hung beside them.

She slapped him across the face. "Of all the fucking lies you've told me…" She opened the passenger side door and took off.

"Where the fuck are you going?" he screamed after her, watching as she ran farther down the path. "It's storming and you're in your underwear!"

"It beats being in that car with you!" she yelled back. When she saw that he was following her she ran faster, but he overtook her easily as she started for the security fence.

"Listen to me, Goddammit!" Zed yelled, grabbing her slippery shoulders and turning her around to face him. It was obvious she had been crying, but her tears were camouflaged by the steady stream of rain down her face. His own hair was falling in his eyes, and he shoved it back so that he could look at her. "I'm telling you the truth!"

"I don't believe you!" Addison shoved him and tried to turn back to climb the fence, but he held her tightly. When she realized that she wasn't going to get away, she began struggling in his arms, slapping at his soaking wet chest.

"Your mother set it all up!"He shook her then, wishing he could somehow rattle some sense into her. "She was trying to break us up!"

"Oh that's rich," she laughed, her cheeks glowing with anger in the moonlight. "My mother is to blame for a lot of things, but your inability to keep it in your pants and then rip my fucking heart out from across the country is not her fault!"

"Yes, it is!" Zed screamed, blinking through the rain to see her more clearly. "I was drugged or something! That girl was an actress! Your mom orchestrated the whole damn thing! Your mom sent us both those letters!"

"Liar!" She sobbed loudly and shoved at him again, slipping from his grasp. He pulled her back to him roughly until their chests were sliding together.

"It's the fucking truth! You know it deep down! I loved you then, and I love you now. I've never stopped!" He slammed his mouth down onto hers, possessing her lips with a ferocity that he didn't know he was capable of. Grabbing her by her soaked hair to look him in the eye. "I know you still love me too." Zed kissed her again fiercely, not understanding why his anger was turning into lust. He pulled her down onto the wet grass, ignoring her feeble protests. Once he had her hands pinned above her head so that she couldn't slap him again, he forced her to look at him.

"Admit it," he growled at her.

"I can't admit what's not true," she spat back at him. Addison's eyes were on fire, shooting daggers at him as if she were imagining his painful death, but it didn't stop her from wrapping her legs around his waist and shifting against his uncomfortably hard erection.

"Stop being a bitch. I'm not letting you up until you say it." Zed ground his hips into her for added effect, leaving absolutely no doubt in her mind that he needed her badly.

"God!" she cried, wrapping her arms around his back and digging her nails into his slick flesh. Sobbing into his neck before biting him roughly, she snapped, "Just shut up and fuck me!"

"No!" he gritted through his teeth. Everything she was doing was painful, but it was also exquisite. He felt alive, and like he was exactly where he was supposed to be. Zed thrust against her more firmly, digging into the hollow between her thighs. "Not until you say you still love me!"

He leaned down and pulled a tightly puckered nipple to his hungry mouth. Sucking on her chilled flesh and pulling at the cold metal bar, he continued his movements until he felt her grinding her hips back into his.

"Say it!" he snarled, feeling more possessive with every thrust.

"Oh, God!" she sobbed again, digging her nails in deeper. "I'm yours… Forever" she croaked.

"Louder!"

"Goddamn you, I still love you!" she screamed. "Now fuck me!"

Zed had reached his breaking point. Fumbling with the fly on his jeans, he tore them open just far enough to free his aching erection. He grabbed a condom from his back pocket and rolled it on before shoving his hand between her legs and yanking her thong to the side. Grunting and panting, he lined himself up at her entrance and slammed inside her, making them both cry out so loud that it echoed through the air.

Zed took note of the biting chill and the downpour of freezing water cascading over his bare back and onto her chest, but short of a lightning bolt striking two feet away from them, nothing was going to make him stop. He ground himself into her with one angry, possessive thrust after another, marveling at the scorching heat that was squeezing and milking every last ounce of sanity out of his cock.

"Yessss," she wailed as he pistoned his hips faster, her head thrown back into the sopping wet grass and her eyes squeezed tight.

"Look at me!" he commanded, refusing to let her do anything that would shut him out of her senses. When her fiery gaze shot to his, he somehow felt himself growing impossibly harder inside her.

"What?" Addison spat out, furious at him for barking more orders at her. "I already told you what you wanted to hear! Isn't that enough?"

"No!" he yelled back. "It will never be enough! I don't just want you to say it, I want you to believe it! I want you to look me in the eye...I want you to know damn well that I'm telling the truth! We were set up! I love you!" Zed grunted as he thrust even harder.

He could see her resolve crumbling in front of him. Zed didn't know if it was what he was saying to her or what he was doing to her, but something finally made her snap.

"Yes!" she sobbed, wrapping her arms around him even tighter, her body starting to shake under his. It looked like fresh tears pooling in her eyes but he couldn't be sure with the rain. "I believe you! I still love you! I fucking belong to you and I can't make it stop! I don't want to make it stop!" she began weeping freely into his neck before kissing the skin where she had bitten earlier. "Nothing else...nobody else...none of it means a thing to me when I'm with you! And sometimes I fucking hate you for it!"

"Well sometimes I hate you, too!" he gritted through his teeth, his body winding tighter, like a coil about to snap. It was true; there were times when Zed hated even the thought of her. He hated her every time she snuck out of his bunk. He hated her every time he saw her with another guy. He hated her every time he remembered that she was no longer his.

"It's not fair!" Addison sobbed biting down onto his ear.

Zed forced her to look at him again, holding her head in place while he wiped the rainy tear mixture out of her eyes.

"No, it's not," he said hoarsely. "But at least now we know." And with that he leaned in and covered her mouth with his own, swallowing her kisses along with her tears.

Both of their bodies began to spiral out of control after that, finally reaching the point of no return together. Zed sped up his thrusts as Addison bucked her hips wildly, and he was startled to feel her hands slide up and grab him by the back of the head. She yanked on his hair until he was staring down at her again before gasping. "Say it!"

"I love you, baby," he grunted barely holding on as they writhed together on the ground.

"Louder," she cried, her voice breaking with an involuntary whimper. He could feel her inner muscles clamping down on him as he bucked his hips and had no idea how he was able to form a coherent thought.

"I love you… I belong to you," Zed moaned. "You have always owned me…body and soul."

And with that Addison exploded in a fit of screams, shaking and bucking beneath him as he quickly followed, pumping deep inside her.

After a few minutes of frantic panting and attempting to regain composure, Zed realized just how freezing she was: her teeth were starting to chatter and she was beginning to shake violently from the cold. He refastened his now-soaked jeans and scooped her up in his arms, holding her close to him as he carried her back to the car.

Sitting down in the back seat with Addison on his lap, he reached forward into the front and turned on the engine, blasting the heat on high. After that, he grabbed his leather jacket and wrapped it around her tightly, tucking her against his chest as he rubbed her back, trying to generate more heat. Zed held her close like that for almost an hour, stroking her hair in silence and watching as her eyes slowly shut. When he tried to wake her up gently to help her get dressed before heading home, she surprised him by whispering against his skin.

"I'm sorry. I should have pieced it together a long time ago. She ruined everything."

"You have nothing to apologize for," he replied, kissing the top of her head. "I don't blame you for thinking what you did. It took me a long time to piece it together, myself. I'm sorry I lost my temper."

She smiled tiredly. "Me too… We always did have the best fights...too bad we didn't have a bed to break this time."

"Or a set of ridiculously expensive sheets to rip apart," he offered with a soft laugh.

They were silent for a few minutes before Addison looked up at him. "How did you figure it out?"

"The letters or the party?"

"All of it."

"Bree was the one who figured out the letters… don't be mad, but she showed me the one you got right before you came home."

"Now she remembers an access code..." she mumbled.

"But as far as my going away party… That happened in Iraq. I was walking through the rec room after dinner and they had a movie on. I looked up when I recognized a voice. It was your mother. I was about to storm off in the other direction when I noticed who your mom was sharing the scene with..." he ran his hand through his wet hair in frustration. "I had looked at that picture you took that night so many times trying to make sense of it all...I had her face memorized. A quick IMDB search confirmed it. It was the movie your mom had been filming that summer."

Addison wiped her eyes. "As if I needed any more reasons to hate her…"

* * *

"Fucking heroin..." Zed mumbled quietly to himself in the dark. Addison had fallen asleep in his arms shortly after they had returned to her dad's house, but thanks to withdrawal insomnia, sleep evaded him. He let out a sigh as he looked at the clock. It was nearly four in the morning. Very carefully, he slipped out of bed without disturbing her and walked into her music room next door.

He opened the shuttered balcony doors and drug a chair over. He was completely exhausted but filled with a peace that he hadn't felt in years. As he watched the moons reflection ripple in the water below, a melody floated through his mind. He got up and grabbed one of her acoustic guitars off the wall and sat back down, plucking out the chords.

"You leapt from crumbling bridges watching cityscapes turn to dust

Filming helicopters crashing in the ocean from way above

Got the music in you baby, tell me why

Got the music in you baby, tell me why

You've been locked in here forever and you just can't say goodbye

Kisses on the foreheads of the lovers wrapped in your arms

You've been hiding them in hollowed out pianos left in the dark...

Your lips, my lips, apocalypse

Your lips, my lips, apocalypse

Go and sneak us through the rivers flood is rising up on your knees, oh please

Come out and haunt me, I know you want me

Come out and haunt me

Sharing all your secrets with each other since you were kids

Sleeping soundly with the locket that she gave you clutched in your fist

Got the music in you baby, tell me why

Got the music in you baby, tell me why

You've been locked in here forever and you just can't say goodbye

You've been locked in here forever and you just can't say goodbye..."

"That's really beautiful..."

He smiled to himself at the sound of her voice.

"Oh, when you're all alone, I will reach for you

When you're feeling low, I will be there too."

He set the guitar down as her arms wrapped around him from behind and her lips found purchase on his neck.

"I woke up and you weren't there. Insomnia?"

"I didn't want to wake you."

She walked around him and sat in his lap, taking the blanket that she was wearing and wrapping it around them both. "You can always wake me up. I'll stay up all night with you if that's what you need."

He kissed her softly before resting his head against her forehead. "Adds… We've lost so much time together…"

"I know," she whispered sadly.

"I don't want to go back to how things were on tour. I want to be with you and only you in every way."

She smiled and ran her hand through his hair. "Does this mean I get to call you my boyfriend?"

His chest shook with silent laughter. Her words reflecting the very ones he spoke in this same room so many years ago. "I'd like that..." he smiled. Slowly, his smile turned into a confident smirk. "So...just what does the title of 'boyfriend' entail?" he challenged.

Addison giggled, thrilled that he was going along with her trip down memory lane. Her grin turned predatory. She leaned in and breathed her reply into his ear. "It's a very demanding role. During the days and evenings, you and I would have to do all the things touring rockstars do, like rehearsals, gigs, meet-and-greets..." She moved to press a light kiss under his ear. "But the nights...those would be spent pleasuring each other to new heights, experimenting with just how long and how hard we could go, and then push things further." Her voice was raspy as his hands cupped her breasts, his lips planting kisses along her jaw. She bit his earlobe, soothing it quickly with her tongue.

"I bet you say the same to all your boyfriends," he whispered playfully.

"Only you, baby..."

"God, I love you so fucking much..."

"Z…" she pulled away, her previous playfulness gone. "You know how I feel about you… I meant what I said earlier, but…" she sucked in a shaky breath and exhaled. "I just can't say it. Not yet… If this doesn't work out… I can't… I can't go through that pain again..."

He pushed her chin up with the back of his hand so that she was looking at him. "I know you've spent years thinking the worst of me, and it's going to take time before you trust me again… But, I..."

"I do trust you," she whispered, cutting him off. "None of this was either of our faults. There are just some things I'm not ready to talk about or say. I need some time..."

"Adds, I've waited for five years to be with you again… I think I can wait a little longer to hear you say the L-word."

"I adore you."

"I can live with that." He smiled as he brought her in for a kiss. "I love that I can kiss you whenever I want."

She bit his lip and giggled. "Is that all you want to do?"

"Not in the least..." He grabbed her around the waist, picking her up, and hiked her over his shoulder. She didn't fight as he trounced into her bedroom and to the ensuite bathroom, setting her down on the tile floor.

"What are we doing?" she asked with a hushed giggle.

He opened the medicine cabinet above the sink and grabbed a condom, ripping it open with his teeth and rolling it over his erection. He gave her wink and knelt down to turn the water on in the jacuzzi tub. "We're gonna get clean before we get very, very, dirty..."

She reached out and pulled him back up to her. "Speaking of clean..." Her fingers slid down his treasure trail to his eager cock. "We both have some serious notches in our bedposts… But… I have an IUD and I trust you..." She gripped the top of the condom, rolling it down and off with a snap. She grinned and licked her lower lip. "The question is… Do you trust me?"

"Abso-fucking-lutely, baby." He pulled her in and kissed her hungrily. When they pulled apart panting and gasping for air he flashed her a predatory smile. He picked her up and stepped into the tub, sitting them down in the warm water.

Addison moaned as she absorbed the warmth. Her wound-up muscles loosening under the jets. Her head rolled back resting on his shoulder. "Gods this is relaxing," she whispered.

His hands slipped under her ass as he lifted her to one of the nozzles. He gently urged her legs apart, wiggling under her to support her body from behind as the rushing water hit her clit. "Does that feel good?"

She nodded her head. "It's nice… but your cock would feel even better inside me."

"Not yet."

"Is that so?" She dipped a hand between his legs and stroked his hard-on. She pulled it up and squeezed her thighs around it as she started to ride.

"Game on..." he breathed into her ear, barely pumping his hips to her rhythm.

She smiled and turned in his arms to face him. She straddled his cock and shoved it in with a caterwaul. "If the neighbors haven't called the cops by the time I'm done with you, I'm doing you all wrong..."

He threw his head back in ecstasy. The feeling of being bare inside of her overwhelming his senses. "Goddamnit..." he panted out. "You feel so fucking good, baby..."

She leaned close to his lips and drank in the hot vapor hastening out of them. "You said you wanted me. Well, here I am, complete with baggage and risks, bells and whistles." She lifted her ass and plunged hard, making another gasp fall from his lips.

He pinched her nipples. "I love your bells and whistles."

She moaned as he pushed up into her farther. The head of his dick twitching against the super-sensitive spot inside her that only he ever reached. "Yes, baby… Yes..."

Her spine slammed against the side of the tub, his body covering hers. Wild pounding, water sloshing everywhere, crashing over the lip of the tub and splattering on the floor. She clutched his shoulders and attacked him with her mouth. Body parts hit the Jacuzzi walls, and a full-on wrestling match ensues, both fighting for control. He tried to shove her arms behind her back, but she grappled for his wrists. Their hands in a deadlock, he used his chest to urge her against the side of the tub, but she dug in her heels and put all her strength into fighting him. The splashes they were making were sure to create huge puddles, but she couldn't bring herself to care.

He was stronger than her, but she played dirty. She clamped her thighs around him and squeezed his cock. Once he was distracted and resumed banging her, she bit his shoulder and shoved him. His arms wrapped around her back in a bear hug. She pushed against him, anxious to maintain the upper hand, but certainly willing to be taken down and thoroughly ravaged if she couldn't. She was straddling a fine line between desire and control. This was them. Both dominant. Both submissive. Both fighting for control but loving when they lost it.

"Why are you fighting me, Adds? You know I'm going to win." A hint of a smile tagged his words, making her fuck him harder just to spite him.

"You can't win a fight you already planned to throw." She lunged for his lips. Teeth bumped as she ripped into his mouth. Their bodily battle eased as the oral one took center stage.

His hands loosened their grip as she rode him harder, biting, pulling, dragging. She could feel the struggle bleeding out of him.

With a rough shove, she disengaged. His breath raged in her ears, competing with the loud swirling bubbles for attention. She fumbled around for the controls, switching off the jets, and loosening the drain plug. The vortex of spinning water suctions as she smashed her lips to his. His hips stopped thrusting as she absorbed his body into hers.

The water level was down to her ass, and aside from gasping, Zed was no longer moving, letting her lead. Working her thighs, she grinded up and down his dick, bouncing on his lap. Her wet hair slapping skin like a whip.

"Close?" She bucked and twisted her hips. His answering smile giving her all the reason she needed to let go, but she held on for a bit longer. "I want your cum on my ass."

"My fucking pleasure..." He pulled out as she flipped over to hands and knees, hiking up her ass.

He knelt behind her and spread her cheeks with one hand. She pushed her ass against his dick, moving in slow spirals, taunting him. In seconds, liquid heat hit her hole in a long series of spurts.

She giggled and looked at him over her shoulder, running her tongue over her lower lip before pulling it between her teeth.

He let out a breath and arched his brow in a silent question, swiping the head of his dick through the cream.

She smiled sweetly. "Are you trying to test my limits, Baby?"

"Maybe..."

She smirked. "Good luck… you know I don't have any..."

"My wild girl…"

Searing pain yanked her head back as he shoved his cock into her ass.

"Fuck!" she screamed. The mixture of agony and pleasure too much. Her knees wobbled and her chest dropped to the bottom of the almost empty tub. Ass up and getting the reaming of a lifetime, all she could do was moan. Pain-tinged tears gathered at the corners of her eyes and mingled with the last of the water.

He pressed his front into her back and lowered his lips next to her ear, placing gentle kissed against her skin. A pair of fingers spread her pussy and dove in while he continued to pound into her with vicious strokes. She was on the verge of begging for mercy when he slowed to a seductive swing that shifted the sensory tide from torment to heady lust. She swiveled her hips to the rhythm he created, dancing, rejoicing at re-connecting with the partner she'd missed for so long.

"God, I've missed fucking your ass."

"You hurt so fucking good..." She slid a hand behind her and alternated between fondling and squeezing his balls. With each new stroke, his breath hitched. They locked eyes. She could tell he was about to lose control. She shoved his fingers aside and concentrated on the cadence, wanting to time her orgasm just right. She readjusted her stance, pushing into him and spreading her ass cheeks to give him an all-access pass.

"God fucking damn it, Baby. I'm about to hose your asshole with a fucking gallon of cum," he moaned through clenched teeth.

She closed her eyes and focused on the rhythm. "Tell me when, and I'll come with you."

He squeezed her tits. His muscles tightened around his cock and then clenched like they were holding on for dear life. "Now!" The thrusts stopped, and his body froze as he released into her. With three brutal clit rubs, she free-fell with him. Roughing her pussy until it was covered in her own juices, she lost her vision. His hooked middle finger joined hers and hit a nuclear power button inside her.

Zed's heavy pants echoed off the tile, mirror, and walls, as he collapsed onto her back with a guttural battle cry. He was totally limp except for those fingers pumping away inside of her like they struck oil and wanted to stake their claim.

She was still orgasming.

With his free hand, he withdrew her fingers and licked them while the other continued to plunge her pussy, working it into a frenzy.

Still coming. "Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God..." It was like being stuck in an orgasmic merry-go-round featuring the most intense pleasure a human being could experience without drugs. Hell, it was even better than drugs.

A good thirty seconds later, the climax ebbed, and she fell into a heap beside him, thoroughly wasted.

A pair of arms wound around her body, enfolding her cold skin in delectable heat. Zed kicked a leg over hers and covered all her corresponding parts with his.

She felt like she'd been robbed of her senses.

"Fucking fuck."

"Understatement," she laughed. She curled her arm around his neck, and he leaned over her shoulder.

When she turned her head, his lips subsumed her in a tender, unexpected kiss. It was like a ray of sunshine in the middle of a downpour, slicing through sinfully alluring darkness and so full of light, it was almost blinding. When he broke away, his eyes looked different, softer even. The endorphin high kicked up anew, and the fluttery feeling she hadn't had since high-school muddled her stomach.

Zed pressed a sweet kiss to her sweaty shoulder and rested his cheek there. Submissive. "Let's go to bed."

Holding hands, leaning on each other, they headed for the bedroom and tumbled into the covers together. He moved in for a lingering, sweet kiss.

She snuck a peek at him while their lips played together. From under the half-lowered shades of his lids, he was staring at her. Heat seeped into her cheeks as she pulled away. "You're supposed to shut your eyes when you kiss a girl," her voice was soft, barely a whisper.

"I finally have you back. I don't want to miss a single second."

Her heart fluttered. It was the only reply she could give. He must have heard it, or felt it. He tightened his arms around her middle and softly kissed her forehead.

"I love you, Addison… forever."

"...and after."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: ****And breath… sorry, I know this was super long, but they finally know the TRUTH! Don't worry, just because they are back together doesn't mean the story is coming to an end anytime soon. There's still plenty of story to tell.**

**ADDITIONAL NOTE FROM LAST WEEK: WildFlowerChildGrace gets COMPLETE credit for the inclusion of Mad World from Riverdale! I can't believe after months and months of harassment (I mean that in the most loving way possible) that I forgot to give her a shout-out when I finally used it!**

**MUSIC USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**Apocalypse- Sex After Cigarettes**

**Madness- Muse**

**All I Wanted Was You- Paramore**

**If Your Mother Knew- Charlie Puth**


	27. Pool

**Chapter 27**

**POOL**

December 25th

"Oh, baby, baby, if you seek Amy tonight… Oh!

Oh baby, baby, we'll do whatever you'll like..."

Addison's hips swayed as she danced around the kitchen whisking the contents of a mixing bowl.

"Oh, baby, baby, baby

Oh, baby, baby, baby..."

She set the bowl down on the counter and adjusted the temperature of the stove.

"Love me, hate me

Say what you want about me

But all of the boys and all of the girls

Are begging to if you seek Amy

Love me, hate me

But can't you see what I see?

All of the boys and all of the girls

Are begging to if you seek Amy.."

She ladled a small amount of batter onto the griddle and spun around to grab a spatula only to let out a loud shriek.

"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST YOU CUM GUZZLING GERBIL FUCKER!" She screamed clutching her chest.

Bonzo covered his mouth, choking back a laugh. "That has to be one of the most creative curses I've ever heard."

She panted trying to settle her heart. "You scared me half to death!" She leaned across the kitchen island and punched him as hard as she could.

"Christ! That hurt..." he laughed standing up and rubbing his arm. "But that floor show was so worth it."

She rolled her eyes and grabbed the spatula, turning back to the stove to flip the pancakes. "I didn't expect you back yet."

"Yeah, I figured that out from the sounds I heard coming out of your bedroom in the pre-dawn hours… You and Z are either back together or you just decided to fuck him to death… so… do I need to call a mortician, or...?"

Addison shook with silent laughter as she poured more batter onto the griddle. "Shouldn't you have been off having your own sexcapades instead of listening to mine?"

"Avoiding my question much? And I wasn't trying to listen. I'm pretty sure half of Malibu heard you two last night."

"Damn… only half?"

They both turned around at the sound of Zed's voice.

He walked over and wrapped his arms around Addison from behind, kissing her cheek."Wanna try again?"

She giggled and turned around in his arms. "Morning, Baby."

"Well, I guess that answers my question," Bonzo chuckled.

Zed bent Addison low and kissed her. "Morning, Baby…"

She pulled him into her further, wrapping her limbs around him.

"Have I ever told you how hot you look barefoot in the kitchen."

"I'm always hot."

"Um… pancakes are burning," Bonzo called out, interrupting them.

"Shit!" she hit Zed's shoulder until he set her back down and let her discard the now burnt pancakes.

"You're making pancakes?" he asked nuzzling against her neck as she poured out the next few.

"Mmhmm. The ridiculously fattening buttermilk kind, too."

He laughed and bit her shoulder. "My favorite."

"I know," she giggled, swatting him away. "Now go sit down so I don't burn anymore."

"Yes ma'am..." he nipped her ear and smiled as he backed away from her and went to sit next to Bonzo. "I thought you'd be at Bree's."

Bonzo huffed. "Yeah, right. Have you met her Dad and older brother? They're terrifying!"

"Awww..." Zed said pinching his cheek. "Did the former and current NFL D-Line stars scare you?"

"You both could have fucking warned me! Her Dad is literally referred to as Mack Truck! There was no way in hell I was going to try and spend the night! And to think… we were actually supposed to be staying there over break!"

"Oh, please. Mr. Mack is a big ole' softy," Addison giggled as she plated a few more pancakes. She turned around and met his eye. "It's Gus you have to worry about."

Zed shuddered. "Aww, man… You remember that party out in the Valley?"

"I've literally never seen anyone else physically carry four teens out of a party all at once before… and that was when he was still at USC! That man is a beast."

Bonzo dropped his head down to the countertop. "Not. Helping."

"This can't come as a shock, Bonz," Addison laughed as she set a plate of pancakes in front of each of them. "You two have been dating for like what, 3 months? Surely her family came up at some point."

"All she said was that her dad was retired, and her brother lives in Wisconsin. She failed to mention that he was there playing for the Packers! You can imagine my surprise when we walked into church last night."

Zed pulled Addison down onto his lap making her wince. "Still sore?"

"A little… just remember, turn about is fair play."

"Bring it on, Baby..." he smacked a loud kiss onto her cheek. "Thank you for breakfast, beautiful. I'm starving."

"Hopefully you can keep these down… How are you feeling?"

"Shit, man..." Bonzo said around a fork full of pancakes. "I should have asked you when you first walked in."

"I'm feeling better… Maybe a little tired… But definitely better than I deserve to." He stabbed a bite of food and popped it into his mouth, moaning as the fluffy goodness hit his tongue. "God, these are fucking fantastic." He held up a bite for her to take.

She smiled and accepted the bite, shaking her head as she chewed. "Oh yeah, I'm going to have to hit the gym hardcore."

"I'll give you a workout..." Zed purred as he bit her shoulder, making her giggle.

Bonzo let out a loud sigh. "Is this what I'm going to have to deal with from here on out? Remind me to ask for a bunk trade… Maybe Bucky..."

"Speaking of..." Addison said as she hopped up from Zed's lap and walked over to where her phone was resting on the counter. "I wonder if he and Lacey have had any luck finding a new drummer."

"Well, I wouldn't call him and ask now," Bonzo said.

She looked up from her phone. "Why not?"

"Um… it's Christmas? I'm sure he's busy with family and shit like that."

"Fuck..." Zed muttered.

Addison smiled, setting her phone back down. "Now or after breakfast?"

Zed rolled his eyes playfully as he stood up and met her halfway, pulling her into a kiss. "I mean, I'm always down for having sex with you, but that particular 'fuck' was because I didn't even realize today was actually Christmas day."

"To be fair, you kinda have an excuse."

"Detoxing or not…"

She snuggled into his side and sighed. "Do you want to celebrate?"

"I haven't really in years."

"Me either… How do you usually spend the holidays?"

"Smoking a bowl and drinking until I pass out."

"What a coincidence," she giggled. "That's what I do!"

Zed laughed and kissed the top of her head. "What a pair we make."

"That's for sure," she sighed running her fingers through his hair. "We can always do what Daddy and I used to do."

"Sushi poolside?"

She nodded her head. "Yup… What says 'Happy Birthday, Jesus' more than raw fish and swimwear?"

He laughed again and wrapped her into a tight hug. "That, my dear, sounds perfect." He looked over to Bonzo. "What do you and Bree have planned?"

"She's coming over here to hang out later this afternoon to escape the craziness that her house apparently turns into on Christmas."

"Perfect!" Addison said with a large smile. I'll place the order at NOBU. Bree can grab it on her way over. Until then… I'm thinking a Christmas movie marathon."

"Yes!"

"Finally!" Bonzo laughed. "Which one first? Frosty? The Year Without A Santa Clause? Miracle on 34th Street?!"

Addison and Zed exchanged a look before breaking out into fits of laughter.

"Oh, no..." Bonzo swallowed. "Nothing good can come from the two of you laughing like that."

Zed wiped his eyes. "We could start with Silent Night."

"Or Red Christmas… or Black Christmas..." Addison added.

"Ooooh, maybe A Christmas Horror Story!"

"Or All Through the House!"

Bonzo shook his head. "You two are so fucking twisted..." he stood up and stretched. "You definitely belong together…. Ruining a perfectly wholesome holiday…." he muttered under his breath as he grabbed his phone. "I'm going to take a nap. I had a hard time falling asleep last night with all the screaming and moaning."

Addison and Zed started to laugh again as he headed towards the stairs. As their laughter died down, Zed looked into her eyes and smiled.

"I love you, Addison."

"I…" she sighed and wrapped her arms around his waist, snuggling into the crook of his arm. "I adore you, Z."

"Hey..." he lifted her chin so she'd meet his eyes. "No pressure. I know, okay… Forever."

"And after."

"That's all I want."

Her brow shot up in challenge. "Really? ALL you want?"

He laughed and leaned down to nip her nose. "Okay, maybe not ALL…"

"Oh, really?"

"Really… Like right now, I want to finish eating those pancakes. And after that… I'm thinking you for dessert."

She smiled and shook her head, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth.

"Fuck the pancakes..." he scooped her up and threw her over his shoulder, making a mad dash up the stairs.

* * *

"You sure you don't want to join me, Beautiful?" Zed whispered into her ear, placing kisses along her neck.

Addison giggled and pushed him away. "If I take a shower with you, it'll end exactly like our bath last night."

"I see nothing wrong with that..."

"You said your muscles were sore. You need the hot water. Go!" she smiled even wider pushing him away with her foot.

He grabbed her ankle and pulled it up to his mouth, biting her, making her laugh even more. "Fine. Have it your way." He leaned over and smacked a loud kiss onto her lips before jumping off the bed and heading into the en suite.

Her cheeks hurt from smiling so much. In less than 24 hours, she felt like her life had been shifted back onto its proper axis. Still, there was a small part of her mind, that couldn't shake the feeling that this was all too good to be true. As the sound of the shower started, she leaned over to her nightstand and opened the drawer in search of something she had buried in there years ago.

"As if the first cut wasn't deep enough

I dove in again 'cause I'm not into giving up

Could've gotten the same rush from any lover's touch

But why get used to something new?

'Cause no one breaks my heart like you..."

She pulled out a silver picture frame from the back, carefully dusting off the glass as she stared at the picture. Senior Prom. Zed holding her, gazing into her eyes like she was the only thing in the universe that he saw. They were so in love. She smiled and traced his handsome features. Could they really be that happy again?

"When you kiss me, I wish we could see what happens next

For a moment, I could forget what happens in my head

If I doubt you, would you come through?

Happy second chance or happy ending

But this time please don't leave me sinking

I'm underwater, No air in my lungs

My eyes are open, and I'm giving up

You are the wave, I could never tame

If I survive, I'll dive back in

As if the first blood didn't thrill enough

I went further out to see what else was left of us

Never found the deep end of our little ocean

Drain the fantasy of you

Headfirst into shallow pools

And I wonder, is it better to get it over with?

The illusion can shatter before we begin..."

Happy second chance, think I could forget

This time please don't leave me sinking..."

Her phone ringing broke through her thoughts. She set the frame next to her on the bed and leaned over to her nightstand to grab her phone.

"Merry Christmas, Brother-dear."

Bucky laughed from the other end. "Merry Christmas, Sis… you sound… different?"

"I do?"

"Yeah… What's up?"

She sighed, plopping back down onto the plush mattress. "Nothing. What's up with you? How's the fam treating your girlfriend?"

"Are you kidding? They're already planning our fucking wedding."

She sat up quickly. "You fucking proposed?! You didn't even ask for my help picking out a ring! You have taste for shit! What were you thinking!"

"NO! God… you know I would have talked to you first… It's just my family being their typical loud obnoxious selves."

She shook her head and laughed. "I can only imagine."

"Speaking of loud families, how are things over at Bree's?"

"Actually..." she let out a breath. "I'm in Malibu"

"WHAT? Why? Are you at Rise?!"

"No! I just decided to stay at Daddy's."

The line was silent for a moment. "You did?"

"Yup..." she said popping her p at the end. "Bree's ENTIRE family came in for the holidays and I just needed some quiet."

"Are you okay? You can stay in a hotel if it's easier. I won't even bitch about the bill if you want to order everything on the room service menu twice...Do you need me to come stay with you?"

"B… I'm fine…" she sighed and stood up, grabbing Zed's boxers and putting them on as she walked to the window. She looked around at the serene beach below and smiled. "Actually, I think I might be better than fine."

"Does this mean you're finally going to stop living in that crappy apartment and move back in after the tour?"

"Still undecided, we'll see… speaking of the tour… any luck auditioning drummers? I know we've got a few lined up through Bamm! But I'd really prefer not to go there if possible."

"I know… And yeah, we've auditioned a couple. We've got one more scheduled for tomorrow that sounds promising. His name actually ends in 'Acey' too, so Lacey is stoked."

"Good deal. Keep me updated."

"Will do."

They sound of the shower stopped. "Hey, B… I've got to run. Enjoy the rest of the break."

"I will. I'll talk to you later Adds."

"Laters."

"Oh, and Adds..."

"Yeah?"

"Whatever it is your doing, keep it up. Happy sounds good on you."

She smiled and nodded her head. "I will." She hung up the phone just as Zed opened the door. She turned around and almost dropped her phone at the sight of him. Wet hair pushed back away from his face, beads of water still dripping down his sculpted chest, a gray towel wrapped low on his hips. She ran her tongue along the inside of her lower lip before bringing it between her teeth.

"You look so perfect standing there

In my American Apparel underwear

And I know now, that I'm so down..." he sang as he walked over to her, making her smile.

"They're more comfortable than mine."

He laughed and pulled her in close.

"Your lipstick stain is a work of art

I got your name tattooed in an arrow heart

And I know now, that I'm so down..." he nipped her nose before kissing her lips, slowly walking them back towards the bed. "You can wear my underwear anytime, Baby."

"I don't think we're going to be watching movies," she said in a breathy whisper as her hand grabbed his hardening bulge through the soft towel.

"We could always just make one," he teased.

She rolled her eyes and giggled, pushing him back onto the bed. "Been there, done that."

"But that one was YEARS ago now," he laughed as she straddled his waist. "I think it needs some updating." He scooched himself back on the bed further, only to have the picture frame slide into his arm. "Is that our prom pic?" he asked as he glanced down.

"Yeah," she said with a shy smile.

"God's that night was perfect… and you..." he whispered, brushing her hair away from her face. "I swear there were nights when I was deployed out there in the desert when the only thing that got me through was remembering the look in your eyes that night." He kissed her softly. "I never thought I'd get a chance to see it again…"

She ran her fingers through his wet hair, gazing into his eyes. He still looked at her like she was the only thing in his world. "I can't believe I ever doubted this."

"I know exactly how you feel, Baby…" He smiled, grabbing onto her ass and rolling them over.

"Hey, Bree's pull… Ahhh!"

They both looked over to the door to see Bonzo standing with his back turned towards them.

"Sorry… Need the gate code for Bree," he rushed out in apology.

* * *

Zed leaned down and kissed the top of her head as they laid in one of the lounge chairs. The afternoon had been nearly perfect. They swam, ate sushi, went for a walk along the beach, and now as the sun set, they were lounging by the pool smoking.

"Girl, if I have said it once, I've said it a million times," Bree said as she exhaled. "You were made for the Malibu sun. I haven't seen you this at peace in a long time."

Addison smiled and took the joint from her. "I haven't felt this way in a long time… I don't think it's all Malibu," she said as she glanced up at Zed, handing it to him. "But… yeah, I didn't realize how much I missed this place."

"Where have you been living?"

"He doesn't know?" Bree asked with the hint of a laugh behind her words.

Zed tightened his arm around her. "What don't I know?"

"I... it's not important," she shrugged.

"Fine… be that way..." he said with a wink, exhaling. "I'll get it out of you eventually."

"She's not the only one Malibu looks good on." Bonzo chimed in, taking the joint from him. "I finally get that fucking song you wrote,"

"What song?" Addison asked turning her head up to look at him.

"I don't remember..." he offered, shrugging his shoulders.

Bonzo snorted out a laugh through his exhale. "Bullshit. It was literally the only song you've written that E and I vetoed. Talk about a song that made you want to sit in a corner and slit your goddamn wrists..."

"Bonz! Really?"

"What? I'm just saying… I get it now," he shrugged. "You two seem very… serene here."

Zed rolled his eyes and huffed.

Addison turned around and straddled his lap, running a hand down the side of his face as she looked him in the eyes. "Can I hear it?"

"Don't look at me like that. You know I'm going to give in and I don't want to."

She smiled and pulled his face to hers, kissing him softly. "Please..."

He wrapped his arms around her tightly, holding her in place. "Fine...

There's no reason, there's no rhyme

I found myself blindsided by

A feeling that I've never known

I'm dealing with it on my own..." he whispered against her lips.

"Phone is quiet, walls are bare

I drink myself to sleep, who cares?

No one even has to know

I'm dealing with it on my own..." he ran a thumb down her cheek as he gazed into her eyes.

"I got way too much time to be this hurt

Somebody help, it's getting worse

What do you do with a broken heart?

Once the light fades, everything is dark

Way too much whiskey in my blood

I feel my body giving up

Can I hold on for another night?

What do I do with all this time?"

"...Z..." she whispered, her bottom lip trembling.

He brushed a kiss against her lips.

"Every thought's when it gets late

Puts me in a fragile state

I wish I wasn't going home

Dealing with it on my own

I'm praying but it's not enough

I'm done, I don't believe in love

Learning how to let it go

Dealing with it on my own

I drive circles under street lights

Nothing seems to clear my mind

I can't forget

It's inside my head, so

I drive, chasing Malibu nights

Nothing seems to clear my mind

I can't forget

It's inside my head, so

I drive chasing Malibu nights

Nothing seems to heal my mind

I can't forget

It's inside my head, so

I drive, chasing Malibu nights..."

He was cut off by Addison's lips against his. Her hands were in his hair pulling him into her even more as their kiss intensified.

"Seriously..." Bonzo said smiling over to Bree. "Please tell me this gets better. I've already walked in on them once today."

Bree laughed and nodded her head. "You have no idea… But, you get used to it… Just get in the habit of knocking before you walk into any room."

Addison pulled back laughing. She grabbed a throw pillow from the chaise lounge and threw it at her best friend. "We are not THAT bad!"

Bree dodged the pillow. "Yes, you are! Don't even try to deny it!"

Zed laughed and nipped at her shoulder. "We kinda are..."

"...Maybe..." she said with a hint of a smile. She softly kissed him once more. "But we can't help it."

"Never could..." he answered with another kiss. "So… Where have you been living?"

She smiled against his lips. "A small two-bedroom apartment in Santa Monica," she rushed out in one breath.

He sat up a little and looked down to meet her eyes. "Really? I would have guessed the strip. Are you anywhere near my old place?"

Addison buried her face into his neck, desperately trying to avoid embarrassment. "It may be exactly your old place..."

"What?!"

Bree choked on smoke as she laughed. "You heard that right. I always thought it was a little nutzo myself, but..." she sighed through a giggle. "I'm sure you can imagine the profanities that were spewed my way when I voiced my opinion."

Zed ran a hand through her hair and held her close. "I don't get it. If you thought I had done everything you were lead to believe, why?"

She peeked up from his shoulder and gave him a small, sad smile. "… Leasing that apartment was my way of keeping you close."

He kissed her roughly.

"Okay, enough of that you two. If I have to peep any more X-rated content I may be returning my sushi to the ocean..." Bree laughed as she stood up and stretched. "Let's go shoot some pool."

"There's a pool table?" Bonzo asked, standing up and joining her.

Zed looked up and nodded. "Yeah, there's an entire rec room on the second floor."

"How am I just hearing about this! Let's go!"

* * *

Addison stopped as they stepped off the stair landing on the second floor. She grasped Zed's hand tightly, her own hand trembling.

Bree and Bonzo continued down the hall, chatting happily as they walked towards the room, not paying attention to Zed and Addison behind them.

"Hey..." he whispered, getting her attention. "You okay?"

She shook her head. "I haven't been up here since..."

He nodded in understanding, pulling her into a hug. "We don't have to go. They'd more than understand if we ducked out."

She pulled back and met his eyes. "I'll be okay… as long as I have you with me."

He squeezed her hand and leaned down to kiss her.

"Are you two coming?" Bree called out from in front of the doorway. She turned back to Bonzo. "Now this," she paused for dramatic effect as she opened the door. "This has been my favorite room since I first came over in elementary school." She opened the door and flipped on the lights. Bonzo could barely keep his mouth from hanging open in shock.

It was an enormous rec room that spanned the entire length of the house, complete with a pool table, an air hockey table, a pinball machine, and three full-sized arcade games. There was an area set up for watching movies, along with about three different gaming systems.

"Oh my God!" Bonzo said as he took it all in.

"While everyone else geeked out across the hall in the studio, I'd be over here."

Zed laughed as he and Addison joined them. "Man… how many days did we lose track of up here?"

Bree snorted a laugh. "Weeks!"

"Wow… I just… I could never imagine having this kind of stuff at my disposal growing up." His eyes hit the air hockey table, making him smile. "I haven't played in years, but I bet I could kick all your asses."

"Oh, bring it!" Addison laughed.

"Oh no," Zed chuckled as he wrapped his arm around her. "Watch yourself, Bonz. You haven't met 'I have to be the best at everything' Addison, yet."

"Oh, it's fucking on!"

"Wait! We should play for shots!" Bree shouted excitedly.

Bonzo turned and looked at her. "What do you mean?"

"We play a game, whoever loses takes a shot. Easy peasy!"

Addison shrugged her shoulders. "Fine with me. I always end up sober."

"That's why we're playing with vodka!" Bree snapped.

"Won't matter… I don't lose."

"Don't worry, Baby. I'll keep you out of trouble."

"Whatever you say, Trouble." Addison laughed and made her way over to the cheesy, dated, vampire-themed pinball machine against the wall.

"Oh, my god!" Bree said as she jumped up and down. "Do you remember the last time we were all up here, Zed? It was the day you two got back from Greece!"

"I don't remember all of it… I was pretty drunk… my girlfriend kicked my ass at Mario Kart that night. But I do remember the pool table..."

Addison rolled her eyes, trying to hide her smile. Of course, he would remember that. She ran her hand along the side of the game. There was a large black coffin inside that would pop open to let the ball drop down into it for extra points, as well as little bats that lit up when they were hit. She always had loved playing it. The moment she heard the dinging bells and saw the flashing lights, she was transported right back to that night.

* * *

"_I want to jump into the neighborhood pool with you _

_I wanna dive into that ocean with you _

_Whisper words that would only make sense to you _

_I wanna love you til my lips turn blue _

_Pull me close _

_Pull me close _

_Wrapping your arms around me _

_My legs around your body _

_Pull me close _

_Pull me close _

_Wrapping your arms around me _

_My legs around your body _

_Got my favorite song on the radio _

_Give me the chills when you put it on, put it on_

_Skin keeps glowing in the indigo_

_The way we feel, no they'll never know_

_The way we feel, no they'll never know_

_Heatwaves on the pavement on these summer nights, honey_

_Nothing they can do, no they can't take this high, away, away_

_The way that you love me makes me feel brand news _

_Pull me close _

_Pull me close _

_Wrapping your arms around me _

_My legs around your body _

_Pull me close _

_Pull me close _

_Wrapping your arms around me _

_My legs around your body _

_Got my favorite song on the radio _

_Give me the chills when you put it on, put it on_

_Skin keeps glowing in the indigo_

_The way we feel, no they'll never know_

_The way we feel, no they'll never know"_

"_That's ridiculously sappy..." Mason's voice cut through her headphones. "I think I might have puked a little."_

"_Damnit, Mason!" Dale snapped. "Stop touching everything!"_

_Addison giggled and pulled her headphones off as she headed over towards them. "Mason!" she launched herself into his arms and held him close. "When did you get here?"_

"_He's been aggravating the shit out of me since you started that last take," Dale said as he readjusted the controls on the mixing board. _

"_You know you love me, Daddy Dale." Mason held her at arm's length and gave her an appraising once over. "Damn, you are tan!"_

"_Well, an extended stay in Hawaii followed by a trip to the Mediterranean will do that."_

"_And you've been home for how long? A few hours? And you're already back in the studio recording?"_

_She shrugged her shoulder with a mischievous smile across her face. "I wrote it on the plane and wanted to get it down as soon as possible. It's a present for Z."_

"_Of course it is," he laughed, hugging her again. "Speaking of... where's he at?"_

"_Across the hall in the rec room with Bree."_

"_Where you should be, Mase," Dale added, hitting the playback button and listening to what Addison had just recorded. "Sounds real good, Sweet-pea."_

"_Thanks, Daddy."_

"_I'll finish mixing everything, you guys go have fun… Try not to destroy them too badly though, Adds."_

"_I make no promises," She giggled walking over and kissing his cheek._

_Mason pressed another button on the control deck. "What does this one do?"_

_Dale swatted his hand. "Sweet-pea..."_

"_I'm on it," she rolled her eyes and grabbed Mason's hand, pulling him out of the room and across the hall to where Zed and Bree were sitting in front of the large television, arguing over which gaming console to use._

"_I call winner!" Mason shouted._

_zzzzzzzzzzz_

"_YES!" she screamed as she threw the controller down and jumped up onto the couch to celebrate her victory. "In your face Jacobs!"_

_Mason laughed as he poured another shot, handing it to his defeated comrade. "Dude… never pick Rainbow Road. What were you thinking?"_

_Zed groaned as he took the shot from him and slammed it back. "Fucking tequila..."_

_She dropped down to straddle his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Hey, you don't like it, maybe you should win next time." She pulled him in for a kiss. "Mmm… you taste so good."_

"_You sayin' I don't always," he teased, biting her bottom lip._

"_You know you do," she giggled kissing him again. _

_Bree and Mason both made gagging sounds next to them. _

"_And on that note, I'm going to go pass out in your room," Bree slurred._

"_Really? Already?" Mason asked looking at his watch. "Shit… is it really after midnight already?"_

_Addison looked up at the clock and nodded. "Yeah."_

"_Fuck, my mom is going to kill me."_

"_Since when do you have a curfew?" Zed laughed. _

"_Since I stayed out all of last week," he blanched. "She's seriously pissed." _

"_Mase, you've been drinking. Just call her and tell her you're staying."_

_He stood up and grabbed his phone out of his pocket. "Wish me luck..." he muttered as he and Bree walked out of the room. _

"_You up for another game?" she asked Zed._

"_Sure. Whatcha wanna play?"_

_She stood up and looked around the room for their next battle, her eyes landing on the pool table. "Pool?"_

_Zed groaned. "I just lost a Mario Kart tournament… that's five shots of tequila… and now you expect me to play pool?!"_

"_Awww..." she purred as she wrapped her arms around his waist. "I'll make it worth your while..."_

_He shook his head and laughed, smacking her ass. "Rack 'em up, Baby."_

_What followed next was the most sexually tense game of pool in the history of rec rooms. _

_Every time she took a shot, she made sure to lean way over, strategically displaying her ample cleavage right in front of a nearly drooling Zed. She would then slide the cue back and forth between her fingers, looking back and forth between her fingers, looking up at him through her lashes as she did so. Whenever she had to take a shot from close to where he was standing, she would make a show of leaning over slowly and sticking her ass out, never failing to look back over her shoulder before striking the ball. _

_To say that Zed was distracted would be an enormous understatement. However, he wasn't completely unarmed in their little game. Rather than trying to distract her during his own shots like she was doing to him, he would wait and make his move while she took hers. When she would lean over with her cleavage on display, he began meeting her gaze with his ring brown eyes, licking his lower lip and adjusting the prominent bulge in his jeans. _

_While she was visibly affecting him with her tricks, his were clearly working as well. Her shots grew increasingly sloppier the more obvious his arousal became. When she bent over in front of him again, he closed the distance until he was leaning over her back, whispering tip into her ear._

_She missed the ball altogether, and he gently placed his hands over hers and guided her, brushing his lips against the outer shell of her ear as he breathed, "Like this." And then he proceeded to gently rub himself against her backside as they followed through the shot, causing her to moan and throw her head back, squeezing her eyes shut against the sudden pleasure of feeling him so close. _

_She threw the cue down on the table and brought her hands up behind his head, effectively trapping him against her. She leaned back into him, rubbing her ass against his erection as she pulled his mouth down to her neck. _

_Between her luscious scent and the extreme pleasure of feeling her grind against him, Zed was quickly drunk on more than just tequila. _

_He parted his lips and left wet kisses along her neck, punctuated by soft nips with his teeth. Her groaning in his ear only fueled his desire, causing him to buck his hips against her more fully. He reached his hands around the front of her, sliding them under her shirt and anchoring her with one large hand pressed against the soft flesh of her stomach. The other hand had a mind of its own, roaming higher until he was cupping one of her breasts, squeezing it roughly when her piercing brushed under his palm._

_She gasped loudly and spun around in his arms, pressing herself against the front of him as his hands slid down to grab her ass. Their mouths met frantically, each of their tongues fighting as they swallowed each other's groans of need. Zed picked her up and sat her down on the edge of the table. _

_Positioning himself between her legs, he growled against her lips when she wound them around his waist eagerly. He reached up to hold her face and pulled back so that he could stare into her heavy-lidded eyes. _

"_I love you, Addison," he whispered._

"_I love you too, Zed. Forever." _

"_About that..." _

"_What?" she panted, glancing between his eyes and his lips. _

"_Forever… And after… We never finished talking about it."_

"_About what?"_

_He grabbed her left hand and brought it up to his mouth, kissing her ring finger._

"_Yes, we did."_

"_No, we didn't… You changed the subject with really, really, really hot sex."_

"_Do we have any other kind?"_

_He pretended to ponder for a moment. "No, not really… but still… I wanted to ask you something."_

"_Zed, I swear to God if you ask me to marry you right now I will punch you."_

_He laughed and kissed her quickly. "No, I'm not asking you right now…"_

_She let out a relieved sigh._

"_No, I wanted to ask you something else… You've said your last name will never be anything but Donnelly…"_

"_Yeah..."_

"_What about something a little less conventional?"_

"_Z, I think the tequila is messing with your head."_

"_What if you didn't have to change your last name?"_

"_Well that wouldn't really present a united front, now would it," she laughed. _

"_What if the person who wanted to marry you, was willing to change their last name for you then."_

"_Are you saying you'd be willing to do that?"_

"_Baby, I don't care what my last name is, I just want you forever and after."_

_She pulled him back to her lips, igniting a whole new kissing frenzy. Shoving her hands into his hair, she yanked and pulled at it as she sucked on his lips and tongue, making him moan deeply._

"_Is that a yes?" he laughed._

"_It's an 'I'll think about it'."_

"_I'll take it!"_

_She giggled and leaned backward, pulling him down with her. He followed happily, climbing onto the table on his knees as she continued to pull him down on top of her._

* * *

.

A few minutes into her game, she felt a pair of familiar arms wrap around her waist. "You look like you're thinking something naughty."

She smiled as his lips left a trail of warm kisses across the back of her neck. "Just remembering a certain game of pool..."

He spun her around pinning her back against the pinball machine with his body. With a loud groan, he pulled her to him, crashing his mouth down on hers. His hands were everywhere at once, roaming over her body before settling in her hair, holding her head in place while he ravaged her lips with his own. He reached down and grabbed her ass, gripping it tightly before lifting her and setting her on the pinball machine, wrapping her legs around his waist.

"See what I mean?" Bree giggled, breaking into their bubble. "They're impossible!"

"Come on, Adds you guys can do that later… you ready to feel the pain?" Bonzo laughed as he flipped the air hockey table on.

"Uh… absolutely." She tried her hardest to sound excited, but all she really wanted to do was drag Zed back to her bedroom to finish what they had started.

For the next two hours, Addison was subjected to numerous competitions. The four of them locked in an all-out war. They played, pool, darts, Donkey Kong, Rampage, just about anything they could turn into a battle. There were one-on-one bouts as well as team matches.

"Damn, Adds! I thought you were competitive!" Bonzo laughed as he handed her yet another shot of vodka.

"Fucking hate you, Bonz..." she grimaced as the alcohol went down her throat. "So off my game tonight." She stood up only to sit right back down when her vision went blurry and the room began to spin.

"Alright, I'm calling it," Zed laughed as he stood up and helped her back to her feet. "We need to get you to bed."

"I'm fine..." she whispered through a hiccup. "Fucking vodka."

"Yeah, okay drunkey… Are you good to walk or do you need me to carry you?"

"As much as I love it when you carry me, I'm going to walk just to prove my fucking point," she snapped as she walked off towards the door.

Zed shook his head with silent laughter as he waved to Bree and Bonzo, and then followed after her.

When he got into the hall he could hear her crying. He looked to his left, finding her sitting between the doors of her father's office and bedroom. "Shit..." he mumbled under his breath as he jogged over to her. He slid down the wall beside her and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into him.

"I miss him so fucking much..." she hiccuped through her sobs.

"I know, Beautiful..." He wiped her eyes with the pads of his thumbs. He held her tight, letting her cry into his shoulder, slowly rocking them back and forth.

"Don't you cry tonight

I still love you, baby

Don't you cry tonight

Don't you cry tonight

There's a heaven above you baby

And don't you cry tonight..."

She smiled through her tears. "I always did love that song… and you sing it better than Axl… just don't tell him I said that." She rested her head against his shoulder, wiping her nose with the sleeve of her shirt. "Is this ever going to get easier?"

"I read something a few months after my mom died that I try to remember… As for grief, you'll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you're drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it's some physical thing. Maybe it's a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it's a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive…" He took a breath and brushed a kiss on her forehead.

"In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don't even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you'll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what's going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything… and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.

Somewhere down the line, and it's different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas..." he whispered, hugging her tighter. "You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you'll come out.

She nodded her head as her eyes filled back up with unshed tears. "We've lost so much... Daddy, your mom..." she closed her eyes, unable to say anything else.

"I know. I miss them..." He smiled and ran his hand down her face. "The two of them..." he shook his head. "They would be so happy that we found our way back to each other, though"

She laughed softly, leaning into his touch. "They would be… They were always so sure of us."

"Yes, they were."

"Daddy always thought of you as his future son-in-law… despite my numerous attempts to remind him of my stance on marriage."

"I thought that was negotiable?"

"And I think it's too soon to reopen those negotiations."

His chest shook with silent laughter. "Fair enough."

She rolled her eyes as she let out a loud yawn.

Zed scooped her up into his arms and stood up. "Let's get you to bed."

She nodded her head and rested against his shoulder as he carried her up the rest of the steps and into her bedroom.

As they lay in her oversized California King bed wrapped in each other's arms, Zed placed a soft kiss to the top of her head. "I have this crazy idea..." he whispered into her hair.

"And what would that be?" she sleepily slurred as she nuzzled further into his chest.

"I owe you a proper Christmas. I think we should start a tradition of our own."

"Zed..."

"Don't fight me on this, Baby. Please?"

"Fine," she sighed sleepily, giving in to him and his warm embrace.

.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I swear I must have written and re-written this chapter about 4 different times. Sorry if it sucks. The next chapter (which was originally included in this chapter) is already written, so it won't take me WEEKS to update next time! I am also working on the next Watch Us Shine chapter, I promise I haven't forgotten about it!**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**If You Seek Amy- Britney Spears**

**Pool- Paramore**

**You Look So Perfect- 5SoS**

**Malibu Nights- Lany**

**Indigo- Alice Grey **

**Don't You Cry- Guns 'N Roses**


	28. Invincible

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

**Chapter 28**

INVINCIBLE

December 26

"Addie…" Zed whispered as he tried to run a hand through her tangled white hair. "… rise and shine, beautiful." His fingers caught in a knot, pulling her hair.

"Oww..." she mumbled.

"Ooops, sorry."

She cracked open an eye, finding him hovering over her.

"Morning, Baby."

She groaned and closed her eye again. "Not yet… five more minutes."

"I made you breakfast..."

Her eyes reopened. "You did?"

"I sure did," he said, his face breaking into a smile. "French toast, bacon, eggs, and fresh-squeezed orange juice..."

"Is there an army you're cooking for?..." she sat up and tried to see the clock, but he was blocking her way. "What time is it?"

He let out a quiet laugh. "No army. Just you… well, Bonzo too. And it's a little after noon."

"Shit..." she pushed the tangled mess of hair out of her face and sighed. "I should be the one making you breakfast… not the other way around… You're still detoxing, you shouldn't have to cook for me."

"I didn't HAVE to do it. I wanted to. You haven't had a decent night's sleep in forever because you've been taking care of my sorry ass. Besides, in case you've forgotten… You love it when I spoil you."

She smiled and pulled him to her, "True."

He kissed her lips. "So are you going to let me?"

"Let you what?"

"Spoil you..."

She smiled against his lips. "I guess… it would be a shame to let all that food go to waste..."

"I wasn't just talking about breakfast."

She pulled back, her eyes full of silent questioning.

"Do you remember what we talked about last night?"

"Should I?"

He bit back a laugh. "Starting our own Christmas tradition?"

Her eyes narrowed. "Vaguely..."

"Well, since I couldn't sleep again last night, I may have done some planning."

"Planning?"

"Yeah… I hope you didn't have anything to do for the next few days."

"Days?"

He nodded his head, smiling wide.

"Z, what did you do?"

"I may have planned a little getaway for the two of us."

She sat up a little too fast, making her head spin. She took a second to regain her equilibrium. "What?"

He kissed her softly. "You. Me. Alone. For. The. Next. Four. Nights." he whispered between kisses.

"Where are we..."

He cut her off with another kiss. "Nope… It's a surprise."

"But, I..."

His lips muffled her words again. "It's. A. Surprise."

She giggled and pushed him away. "Fine. You win."

"Good. But, I do need to borrow your car so I can go get some things."

"Do you even have a driver's license?" she asked through another giggle.

"Yes, I have a driver's license!" he said feigning insult.

"Just checking… Keys are in there usual spot." She leaned in and bit his ear, quickly soothing the sting with her tongue. "Wreck my car and I'll wreck you."

He rolled his eyes and tickled her sides. "If I can drive a fucking tank, I doubt a Volvo sedan is going to be a problem."

She batted his hands away through a fit of giggles. "Point made! Stop!"

He ceased his tickle assault and pressed himself against her. Her legs automatically wrapping around his waist as he ground into her. "I'll be back later..."

She pretended to pout and pushed him away. "Tease."

With a quick kiss and a wink, he stood up, pulling her up with him.

"You still won't tell me where we're going?" she asked.

"You'll find out soon enough." He paused, and then wound his fingers between hers. "Anxious?"

"A little… We've been in the car for over two hours and it's already late."

"Well… we're almost there." He pointed ahead to a sign on the side of the road.

"Big Bear?!" she read out excitedly. "We're going to Big Bear Lake?!"

"We sure are."

"EEEEKKKK!" she threw her arms around him and kissed his cheek.

"Good surprise?"

"The best! But, wait… you don't ski..."

"Nope."

"Then why are we going to a skiing destination?"

He shrugged his shoulder and stole a glance in her direction. "Oh, I don't know… isolated cabin, romantic views… fireplace… I'm sure we can find other activities other than skiing to occupy our time."

She giggled and leaned back over to kiss him again. "Did you rent us a cabin just so you could have your wicked way with me?"

"...Maybe." He said as he turned off the highway at their exit.

She sat back and smiled. "Sounds perfect… but you know you didn't have to go through all this trouble. I still own the house in Aspen. We could have flown out there and stayed for free."

He shook his head and stole another glance in her direction. "And how often do you use your numerous properties?"

"I don't."

"Exactly."

She chewed her lip and smirked. "Are you maybe trying to prove something to me?"

"Don't know what you're talking about, Baby."

She threw her head back and laughed. "Bullshit… And just so you know, you don't have anything to prove. I know you're not with me for my money. That was my mother talking."

"Adds, I'll always have to prove that. Maybe not to you, but to everyone else."

"I don't give a shit about anyone else." She took a deep breath and grabbed his hand. "What have I always told you?"

"That I'm great in bed?" he said with a hint of a laugh.

Addison rolled her eyes and smacked him playfully. "Well yeah, but I was thinking more along the lines of 'nothing in this life, the money, the name, none of it means anything without you'. I…."

He squeezed her hand. "I love you too, Beautiful."

A few minutes later they were turning down a new road with hardly any streetlights. A couple of white flakes hit the windshield.

"Snow! Yes! I was hoping we'd get some!" Zed leaned forward, peering through the darkness, watching for some landmark or sign.

"Like we haven't been in our fair share of snow lately!" Addison laughed.

He turned to her and threw her a wink. "It's all part of the plan, Baby."

"Trouble."

"You know it." He ran his tongue along the inside of his lip and arched his brow, making her clench her thighs together in anticipation.

They climbed a steep hill for a while in silence. He slowed the car, carefully navigating the road amid the steadily increasing onslaught of snow. Her pulse racing with the tempo of it. Alone with Zed. On a snowy mountain. In the middle of nowhere. She stared at his handsome profile. No place she'd rather be.

The log cabin was isolated from civilization. It was a quaint one bedroom, one bath. Both inside and outside rustic and charming: red checked curtains, hardwood floors, a stone fireplace with a thick rug and plenty of woolen blankets. The place smelled of cedar— fresh and clean. Zed dragged in a couple of logs from outside and laid them before the fireplace. He shook the snow from his emerald hair, and then shrugged out of his leather jacket and hoodie.

Addison's mouth ran dry. There was just something about seeing him in a red plaid flannel shirt. She couldn't remember the last time she saw him wear anything but black or a plain white t-shirt. But flannel brought back all sorts of naughty memories of her Seattle bad-boy.

As he arranged the logs and stuffed newspaper into the nooks and crannies, she got to work setting up the miniature Christmas tree he had purchased earlier that day. A string of lights, a little star topper, and a couple of ornaments remained in the box for him to help her with later.

Next, the lasagna went into the fridge. While Zed and Bonzo were off shopping, she had kept herself occupied in the kitchen. He had insisted that he didn't want her buying him anything, but he hadn't said anything about cooking for him. She checked her watch. It was eleven already.

"You hungry?"

Zed's rear end was sticking out from the fireplace. He was bent over, still fiddling with the kindling. She nudged his ass with a sock-covered toe as he lit a match and spread the fire around inside. He tossed the stick in and faced her. She licked her lower lip. _Damn, that shirt looks nice on him_.

"Yeah," he said, tugging the flannel back down over the waistband of his jeans.

Realization suddenly struck her. She really had Zed all to herself. He was hers. No need to sneak around. No need to keep quiet. No sharing. No beating off groupies. No rules. Part of her wanted to tackle him, shove him to the floor, and maul him. The other part wished he'd do that to her. He stood up, hiking up his pants. "I made us dinner while you were gone earlier..." She bit her lip, then jabbed a thumb in the direction of the kitchen.

"Fuck. You better stop looking at me like that, or you're gonna be sore as shit tomorrow."

"Promise?" Her smile widened as she walked off towards the kitchen.

While she was in the kitchen, he adjusted his cock about twelve times. The bastard had no interest in keeping calm but was all about carrying on. He got up and stoked the fire even though it didn't need it. Still hard as a fucking rock. Pushing the curtains aside, he peeked out the window. Even in the dark, it was hard to miss the wall of white slicing up the night. "Hey, the snow's coming down pretty good now," he called over his shoulder.

"Really?"

Her heat warmed his back. She slid her arms around his middle and pushed a plate of lasagna into his grasp.

"We should go out and play."

"Or we could stay in and play," she whispered seductively.

He turned into her. The food and their clothes the only obstacles between them. If she said the word, he could shuck that shit in three seconds flat. He picked up the fork, cut off a piece of melted goodness, and hovered it in front of her saucy smile. Without warning, she bit and held the fork hostage with her teeth. She stared up at him, eyes sparkling with mischief. He grabbed the fork, set it on the plate, and dropped the dish on the nearby table. Then, he cupped her cheeks and swooped in for a taste. She gave it to him. Savory and sassy greeting his mouth in an explosion of heat. She pressed the bite on her tongue into his. He gobbled it up, half-chewing, half-kissing, all messy. Her hands skating from his stomach up his chest to rest on his shoulders.

"I've got the perfect indoor game," she mumbled against his lips.

"Now we're talking." He attacked her mouth once more for another taste and licked the sauce off her. "Does this game require clothing? 'Cause I think I'm suddenly allergic to mine." He started to unbutton his shirt, but she stopped him.

"Don't you dare," she commanded.

He swallowed hard. The domineering tone in her voice a promise of dark things to come. Things they both needed. Her eyes flashed with white-hot lust that nearly set his jeans on fire. He lowered his fingers, and she tracked their progress on the way down.

Her gaze fell to the outline of his dick begging for freedom. She traced the relief, keeping her eyes on his. "I want you to help me decorate."

He stilled. "Not where I thought this was going, but… Okay." He took a step back towards the small fake pine.

She shuffled through a brown box beside the tree and held up an unopened package of Christmas lights. "I was thinking more of decorating you."

"Uh … what?"

She returned to his personal space and made herself at home with a few strokes of his dick through the denim. "I thought you wanted to _play..._"

She sounded so innocent until the words caught up with him, and he struggled to form a coherent response. All he could do was nod vigorously.

Her features shifted from playful and innocent to stern and seductive as she pointed to the floor. "Lie down." The "down" coming out extra forceful.

Zed struggled extra hard not to detonate an extra-large cum bomb in his jeans as her voice became more commanding. He assumed the position, lying face up.

Addison took her sweet time opening the box of lights and pulling out the string with torturous slowness. His pulse pounded to the lazy rhythm as each light popped free of its plastic housing. She unzipped her pants and stepped out of them. Her red satin underwear eased down her thighs, past her knees, and over the slopes of her toned calves. The small silver ring piercing the hood of her clit taunting him. All he could think about was pulling it with his teeth while breathing her in. Her gaze dropped to his painfully eager cock. Her foot shot out and lowered to soothe— or maybe intensify— the ache. Trapped beneath a thick layer of jeans, his cock fit right under her arch as she ground him to a near climax. He squirmed.

"Don't you dare come without my permission," she threatened as she kept up with the rubbing.

He swallowed and nodded as a large smile spread across his face. "Yes, ma'am."

She tossed the string of lights onto him and lifted her shirt over her head. Alternating between plumping and fondling her breasts under the matching red satin bra, she said, "Lose the jeans. The shirt is mine."

He made quick work of clearing his lower half of every stitch of clothing, eagerly awaiting further instructions. She was fucking killing him, and he couldn't die fast enough.

She fixated on his dick and subtly swept her tongue between her lips. "Trust me?"

"Fuck yes, Baby. I've missed this so fucking much," he admitted, salivating at the sight of her glistening pussy. He needed her on his mouth, smothering him, drowning him.

She cracked him with a silent admonition. "You're a little wild tonight, Zed. Like a stallion in need of taming." She dropped to her knees, straddling his hips, her cunt hovering inches over his frenzied cock.

He clenched his fists to keep from thrusting upward.

"You know what I do to wild horses?" she asked.

"No, ma'am." Christ, she owned him. All she had to do was say the word, and he'd bathe her tight pussy in a cum shower. No touching necessary.

"I rein them." She slowly lifted the Christmas lights, staring at them, and winding the string around her hand several times. Then she leaned toward the wall and plugged the lights into the socket. An array of color brightened the dark room, making her glow. She loosened a bit of the cord, scooped up his cock and balls, and tied the lights tightly around the mass of flesh. "And then I break them."

"Fuck." The word came out as a whisper, but inside his head, he screamed it. His knees lifted of their own accord. She sat on them, her wet pussy kissing his thighs, silver sliding across skin. The pain cut deep, mixing with intense pleasure, and creating a searing disruption in his motor function.

She slipped off of him and used the twined string as promised— as a lead— urging him to stand. The cord bit into her, leaving deep pink trenches on her hands. "Come on," she said, guiding him to the wall.

He had no choice but to follow. Not that he'd consider doing anything else. He forced himself to keep his fists at his sides, though a couple of sudden jerks caused him to jerk too.

She dipped her free hand into her bra and popped a studded nipple out, teasing him further. He bit his bottom lip to keep from darting his tongue out for a taste. The other barbell-laden nipple lifted free of the fabric, both now flashing upward, begging for attention. She caressed his cheek. Then with agonizing slowness, she undid the seven buttons down the front of his shirt and pushed the flannel plaid open to admire his chest. A kiss to each nipple. A languid roll of tongue across his abs. She sank to her knees, licked the head of his cock with three swirls and stared up at him, her big blue eyes illuminated by Christmas lights. Using the green cord to set the pace of an epic blowjob, she moaned as he slid into her mouth. Pull in. Push out. Tighten grip. Repeat. He was fucking her mouth at the mercy of the string of lights and fantasizing about a lightning strike to add even more intensity. But a zap like that would hurt Addison. Nobody was allowed to hurt her. Ever. So, he basked in the pleasure of her painful tongue bath and concentrated on reining in the orgasm poised at the base of his balls, ready to cut loose a deluge of cum in her mouth.

Her lips full of dick, she fluttered her lashes at him, yanking the cord to lure him deeper down her throat. Her gag reflex non-existent as she opened her mouth wider to make more space for him. Her teeth grazing his skin.

He was going to blow. He couldn't hold off another second.

She held him in place for several seconds before pushing him away. She stood suddenly, loosening the light string. His blood resuming its flow in a rush. Placing her back against the wall, she twisted her wrist and tightened her grip once more, this time dragging his heaving dick against the door of her pussy. She hiked a leg around his hip. "Hold me up," she instructed.

Barely able to breathe, he supported her thigh and gazed at her perfect face.

With her free hand, she smoothed his chest under the open flaps of his shirt. "I missed you wearing flannel. You've always looked so damn good in it." Her fingers worked the cotton, and she lifted it to her nose. Closing her eyes, she inhaled. "I love the way you smell. Especially when you're fucking me." The lighted hand yanked without warning, and his cock speared her splayed pussy. "Fuck. Me."

He bit down on her shoulder. "That's the plan."

She worked him like a mule, pulling and pushing into and out of her. His balls were on the verge of a massive eruption. "Fuck, Addie. I'm gonna come. Oh, Christ, I'm gonna come …" Air left his lungs. His head tipped backward. He gave over control of his body to her. Completely belonging to her.

"You wanna fill me up?" With two fingers, she coyly spread her pussy for him.

"Tease."

"Say it, Zed. Tell me how bad you want it," she demanded. "Tell me how good this feels."

He struggled free of his endorphin daze long enough to put thoughts into words, but only just. "I wanna fill you with so much cum that your pussy weeps, Baby. I wanna put so much of me into you, you steal my motherfuckin' identity." He paused long enough to trap her with his gaze. "And when we're done, and my jizz spills down your legs because your cunt's brimming with me, I'll lick the shit off and drizzle it on that lasagna. Or your pussy. Or your mouth. Wherever you want it, baby, it's yours."

The fuse of a slow smile burned a pleased trail across her features. She widened the part between her thighs to welcome more of him and guided him hard and fast. He gave her control— every bit of it. The only adjustment he made was the angle where the base of his dick came in contact with her clit. He lifted his hips just enough to ensure that he hit her directly on the metal piercing and forced it to wiggle with each drilling thrust.

"Oh, God Almighty," she cursed, flattening her spine to the wall behind her. "Just like that, Zed. Just like that." She slowed her arm, released her grip on the lights, and said, "Now do it. Top me off."

The blood flow returned to his dick and balls in a frenzy, and he gave her two more thrusts before the paralysis of his orgasm shut down all brain function. Thrust. Spurt. Thrust. Spurt. Thrust. Spurt. It went on and on. He lost his vision, his breath, his heartbeats. When he came to, she was holding him up by the flannel shirt she was so fond of.

"Shit, are you okay?" She tapped his face a couple of times.

The fuzzy edges of his sight returned to normal, and he laughed a slow, languid chuckle. "Fuck," was the only word he had. He shook the stupid out of his head. "Fuck."

"Z?" She peered at him, worry painting heavy lines across her brow.

He nodded and smiled. "I'm good. So fucking good, baby," he whispered as he pawed clumsily at her cheeks, consumed by his own subspace, riding the high for as long as it would let him.

She laughed as they slowly sank down to the floor, her eyes trailing down his body, she suddenly stopped when they landed on the edge of a strip of tape wrapped around his thigh. "You got a new tatt today?"

He nodded his head. "Yeah..." he whispered, still trying to recover. "One of your Christmas presents."

She sat up grabbed his ankle, pulling his leg up. She let out an audible gasp as her jaw dropped open.

"It matches the one you've got, right…..here," he said running his finger along the outside of her breast, tracing the Alpha Omega tattoo she had. "A and Z, Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end of everything."

"Z..." She was at a loss for words. Without warning, she pulled him to her roughly, kissing him with everything she had. "So. Fucking. Hot." she panted against his lips before a thought crashed over her like a freezing bucket of ice water. "Fuck me…."

"Give me about two minutes and I'll be good to go, Baby."

"No… Everyone knows I have that tattoo!" she whispered in a panic.

"So..."

"What are they going to think when you show up with a matching one?! Lacey was already suspicious about our similar tatts!" She closed her eyes and dropped her head into her hands, the panic rising in her chest. "How the fuck are we going to do this? How the hell can we survive being on tour together when I have a fucking clause in my contract that says I won't get involved with you? How can we be around each other 24/7 and not be with each other? I can't handle how much I need you! It's too much," she whispered. "It's all too much… Lacey and Bucky...I can't take wanting you like this in front of them, too!"

He could hear her voice shake as tears began to fall.

"Maybe we shouldn't do this. Maybe we should just..."

"Addison!" Zed nearly shouted, trying to snap her out of it. "Look at me, Baby."

She reluctantly picked her head up and opened her tear-filled eyes.

"Do you want to be with me?"

She nodded her head and wiped away an errant tear. "More than I could ever say, It's just..."

"Listen to me, Addison… I love you. I'm not going to lose you again. After everything that we went through to find our way back to each other, I am not going to let something like this keep us apart. We are on the edge and I'm willing to risk it all. This… You and me... is worth fighting tooth and nail for. But I can't do it alone. I need to know we stand together."

"I'll do whatever it takes, but..."

"Shh," he whispered soothingly. "We'll sort it out, somehow… Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

"Do you really?"

"Z..."

He placed a finger on her lip and gave her the smile he knew drove her wild. "Know what I want right now?"

She arched a brow. "Don't look at me like that…"

"I want to conduct an experiment."

She glanced at the tattoo on his leg.

He lifted her chin and looked her in the eyes. "I want to test a theory about what I think you need." Her breath hitched, but he didn't give her a chance to reply. He kissed her quiet. Her lids drifted shut as their mouths moved together, dipping, licking, tasting.

"You say you'll do whatever it takes to make this work."

She nodded.

"You trust me?"

She nodded again.

"Implicitly?" he asked.

After a moment's hesitation, she settled on a whispered "Yes."

He offered his hand. "Come on."

"Where are we going?"

"Outside."

She laughed. "Uh, it's freezing out there, and we're naked."

"I know. It'll be fun. Let's go."

"I'm not going out there," she said. "You're a crazy person."

"You just said you implicitly trusted me. So, now you're going back on your word? Addison, you wound me." he clutched his bare chest.

She hesitated and exhaled heavily, shaking her head. "I can't..."

"Can't never could." He slapped her ass on his way to the door, and she squealed a protest. "It's only gonna get colder the longer you wait." He flipped on the floodlight outside, turned the knob, and pulled the door open. Snowflakes tumbled everywhere, and cold wind thundered inside, rustling the little Christmas tree she set up and teasing the flames in the fireplace higher.

She squeezed her legs together and folded her arms over her breasts. "Zed Milo Jacobs, you shut that door right now before I—"

He quirked a grin. Usually, the sound of his full name pissed him off, but falling from her lips, it sounded like heaven. "Before you what?"

A staring contest followed. She scowled at him. He smiled at her.

After a long moment of silence, she stomped toward him. "You're totally insane. You know that, right? Lost your freaking marbles, you have." She reached for the coat she wore on the drive up.

He snagged her hand and curled it into his chest. The rest of her following. Snowflakes darted inside, collapsing on their skin, melting on contact. The cold painful. They were both shaking from it.

"I may have lost my marbles, but I've still got you."

"Can you please shut the door now?" she begged, trembling and pressing her chest against him.

"Not until we've had a snowball fight."

"What?" she cried. "No. No way in hell. We're not throwing snowballs at each other naked in the dark in subfreezing temperatures. Uh-uh. I thought you wanted to give me what I needed? I definitely do not need to be taken to the hospital with frostbite on my girlie parts. Now shut the door!"

"Okay, fine. If you won't go with me, I'll do it alone." He unwound himself from her grip and slipped outside, leaving her cowering against the bitter chill in the doorway. It was cold as fucking balls, but he didn't care. She didn't realize that he was giving her what she needed: a platform to let go of the doubt holding her back and keeping them apart.

She shook her head and shut the door on him.

He rolled his eyes, braving the thick layer of snow on the ground and picked up a handful. Addison appeared at the window, arms crossed, frowning with disdain. He formed a big ball and lobbed it at the glass. She jumped and her jaw dropped when white splattered in front of her. He laughed and reached for another. He threw them over and over and over until he couldn't feel his body anymore. All while silently begging her to come outside. He needed to prove he was strong enough to take care of her. He needed to show her that he'd protect her from ice, fire, or a motherfucking zombie apocalypse. He needed her to trust that he's committed to making them work, no matter what obstacles they were going to face when the tour resumed.

She disappeared. Defeated, he started toward the door. It opened before he got there. She stepped tentatively across the threshold, lips fused together, nipples hard enough to cut glass. As fat white flakes cascaded around her, the sliver of moonlight above winked like it had a secret. For as long as he lived, he knew he'd never forget the picture of her, butt-ass naked the day after Christmas in the middle of nowhere, an ice princess lording over an ancient lake. He didn't know what he had ever done to deserve her, but he did know that he would spend the rest of his life worshiping her. He stretched his arms wide. Exposing— offering— himself in the purest, rawest, most vulnerable form he had. "Trust me, Addison…

Follow through

Make our dreams come true

Don't give up the fight

We will be alright

Cause there's no one like you

In the universe..."

She covered a sweet sigh with shaking knuckles, inhaled a full breath, and let it out in a cloud of puffy vapor.

"Don't be afraid

What you're mind conceals

We should make a stand

Stand up for what we believe

And tonight we can truly say

Together we're invincible

And during the struggle

They will pull us down

But please, please let's use this chance to

Turn things around

And tonight we can truly say

Together we're invincible..."

He stared into her eyes as he sang. The flare of conviction and devotion blazing behind them promising that she did trust him. With everything. They were going to be okay. Yeah, they were going to need to do a fuck-ton of work to keep their secret, but they were going to make it.

She daintily squatted down, gathered a ball of snow, and winged it at him. The ball exploding in the dead center of his chest. He stumbled backward, planting his bare ass on the blanket of snow, laughing hysterically. Addison charged over and fell on top of him, straddling what used to be his cock, but was now a shriveled grape withered on the vine. A reluctant smile cracked the glacier of her face, and pretty soon, she was laughing and shivering with him. He had lost feeling in his limbs. His ears would probably break clean off if he flicked them. But when her lips landed on his, the ice melted, and there was nothing but feeling. He enfolded her in his arms, his legs, his everything. They lay trembling, entwined, freezing, and totally, utterly, completely connected. And completely exposed. Just what they both needed. Trust.

When their wobbly kiss ended, she stroked his cheek. "A-are y-you happy n-n-now?" she demanded, her teeth chattering uncontrollably.

"You're gonna pretend like you didn't love what just happened here?" he teased.

"I'm g-gonna pretend I'm not in l-love with a f-fool who's going l-land us b-both in the hospital. C-can we g-go inside please?"

He ran his hand through her frozen hair. "I'm not done with you yet. There's more to come."

"D-does it involve hot ch-chocolate or t-tequila?"

"Nope." With every ounce of strength he had, he pushed up, tightening one arm around her, and lifted her off the ground. "But it ought to warm you up."

She held on to his shoulders and clamped her legs around his hips as he trudged through the white. As soon as they were inside, he lowered her to the floor by the fireplace and threw a blanket around her. They fused into a huddle of twitching shudders and clacking teeth.

"I can't believe I let you talk me into that," she grumbled, burying her nose into his neck.

"Come on, it was fun when you finally got out there." Supporting her back, he eased her to the rug and tested the waters with a soft dip into her pussy and a thumb on her clit ring. She tensed, searching his eyes for an explanation. He didn't give her one. "I'm gonna take you now," he whispered.

She swallowed.

"I'm not gonna be gentle."

Her chest rose and fell with a couple quick breaths.

A rush of fluid licked his finger as he probed deeper. "And I'm not gonna stop until you come so hard you blackout."

She stared at him, swallowing again.

"You ready?"

She pressed her lips together and nodded. He always loved that their kinks complemented each other. With their roles reversed from earlier, he threw the blanket off of them, split her legs open and dove face-first into the well of her cunt.

She laid there splayed open, shivering, with Zed devouring her before the fire, a wave of relief settling under her skin. He was right. The moment he stripped away her control, she let go and fell into a quiet, delicious peace. Zed lapped at the crux between her legs, dragging his tongue and nose through the growing puddle, growling his approval between licks. Zed was the man she needed: the take charge, you're mine man. Yet, at the same time, he needed her to be the same. She slipped a hand through his cold, wet hair and grabbed a hunk of it. He twisted her wrist away and pinned it to the floor beside her. Her pulse raced at the restraint. She teetered on the edge of self-discipline, knowing if she said the word, he'd let her go, but daring herself to keep quiet so she could live out the thrill of completely submitting to him with unconditional surrender and trust. It was the greatest gift she could share with him.

He shouldered his way in, angling deeper between her legs, sucking her clit to the brink of pain.

Pleasure surged wildly through her. "God, Z." She rolled her head back and forth across the rug, moaning, panting, mentally begging him to stop and keep going all at once. "I'm gonna come—"

He lifted his head to stare hungrily at her across the goosebumped plain of her stomach and rubbed his palm across her waist. Her natural lube glazed his lips, leaving clear, gleaming smears across his stubbly chin. "Not yet."

"If you keep looking at me like that, then yes yet. Yes now!"

Exhaling gently on her flesh, he crawled the length of her trembling body and hovered over her on all fours. He dipped in for a kiss but stopped an inch short of her mouth. He breathed, "Get up."

A tingle grabbed the base of her spine and chased the aftershock of those two small words to her neck. "Yes, Sir."

"Good girl..."

After the round of going down, she was dizzy as hell. It took a moment for her to find her balance, but she managed to stand up on rubbery legs.

He stalked behind her, arms snaking around her waist. Two fingers plunged into the wetness below while the other hand kneaded her breast. His cock stuffed between her legs, but not penetrating, he walked her to the long wooden table taking up a big chunk of the open living/ dining room, kicking a chair out of the way. It clattered loudly across the wooden planks. Her heart pounded faster as he wedged a knee between both of hers and pried her legs open from behind. Cock gliding across the slick heat, he fisted a length of her hair and yanked her head back to rest on his shoulder, exposing her neck, forcing her to succumb to the spell blazing in his eyes. She concentrated on his warm brown stare, and a fresh flood of wetness pooled between her thighs. She wanted to give him what he wanted. Give him her body. Give him goddamn everything. She knew he'd do it for her, too.

"I'm gonna fuck you now."

She closed her eyes."Yes."

He tightened his grip on her hair. "Look at me when I fuck you, Addison."

She swallowed and focused on his lips as they fell to hers, roughing, teasing, adoring.

He shifted his attention to her shoulder and raked the skin with his teeth, alternating licks and bites. His fingers below spreading her open, inviting his beautiful cock in.

She expected a steady slide, not the harsh stab she got. She gasped, trying to adjust to the sudden presence of a cock too big for the flesh surrounding it, but he didn't give her the time. He plunged in and out, hard and fast, groping her bouncing breasts as they absorbed the blows. A hand slithered upward and clamped around her throat, making her moan and close her eyes.

"I told you to look at me," he said with firm, deadly quiet.

Her eyes fluttered back open, meeting his once more.

Supporting her head with his shoulder, he dropped kisses across her cheek— a sweet, gentle contrast the hard fucking below the belt. Her pussy stretched. She stood on tiptoes and angled her hips upward to enhance the pleasure from the pounding. He fiddled with her clit piercing. She couldn't take it. It was super sensitive, and the fondling was too much. She drew a leg up in retaliation.

He wrestled her thigh down. "No," he commanded. "Feet stay on the floor."

She refocused her slipping concentration. On the floor. On the floor. She visualized glue on her feet and tried to keep from squirming.

"Trust me..." He slowed his thrusts and ground to a halt, slipping out of her. He spun her around to face him, shoving her back to the table, and grabbing both her ankles as he reentered her.

She stared into his eyes, utterly ravaged by them, she forgot where she was. She didn't want to ever lose this man again. She'd do anything to keep him. "Forever… I'm yours, Zed," she vowed as their shared orgasm overtook her like an avalanche of feathers raining on her head. "Yours …"

He continued pumping until the last ripple of the wave faded into memory. Caressing her cheeks, lips, and chin, he smiled and pulled out. Pulling her up, he covered her with kisses, delicate tongue trails, and vapor from his soft breaths. He worshiped her.

She wished every kiss he pressed into her skin would stay there forever, like tattoos of his lip prints revealing the path of where he'd been. She wished the world could see the marks he leaves on her— not physical marks, but emotional ones. "That was … amazing." she sighed and hugged him to her exhausted chest.

"We're going to make this work."

She smiled and placed a kiss on top of his head. "Yes, we are."

"Can I give you your Christmas present now?"

She pulled back and gave him a questioning look. "I thought you said the tattoo was..."

He shook his head, smiling up at her through tired eyes. "I said it was ONE of your presents." He eased himself out of her embrace and walked over to where his jacket was hanging up. "Besides, this one is something you needed." He rooted around in the pocket for a moment before pulling out a small blue box.

"Zed! I didn't need anything from Tiffany's!"

He rolled his eyes and grabbed her hand, bringing her back in front of the fire. He sat down, pulling her down into his lap. "Yes, you did…" he whispered into her ear as he balanced the box on her knee.

She cautiously opened it, removing the soft bag inside. Her breath caught when her locket landed in her palm.

"I had it polished, and got you a new chain," he said as he brushed her hair off of her neck. He took the locket from her hand and clasped it around her neck, placing a soft kiss on her bare shoulder.

"Zed..." her voice shook as she clutched the platinum heart against her chest. "This means more than I could ever say…" she turned to look at him, running a hand down the side of his face, and pulling him in for a soft kiss. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Merry Christmas, Baby."

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Yeah, this was definitely one of those chapters that was 100% just for the sake of fluffy smut. I make no apologies. ****Also, I wrote this BEFORE Christmas, but life got in the way and I ended up posting the previous chapters later than anticipated. **

**Music Used In This Chapter**

**Invincible- Muse**


	29. Lust For Life

**Chapter 29**

**LUST FOR LIFE**

December 30

Zed couldn't take his eyes off of her. There was just something so peaceful in the way she sat there across the table from him- one long leg propped up on the chair, her snow-white hair piled high on top of her head, wearing nothing but his red flannel shirt as she sipped her coffee and read from a much-loved copy of the complete works of Edgar Allan Poe. She was simply breathtaking.

"I can feel you staring..." she whispered as she peered over the top of her book. "What are you doing over there?"

He quickly closed his notebook and pushed it to the side. "Nothing."

"Bullshit."

He bit back a laugh. "Fine. Writing a song. But it's not finished yet."

"Can I hear it?"

"Nope. Not this one… Not yet anyway."

"Why not? I've heard all the other ones you've written while we've been here."

"Not all of them."

She smiled and set her book down, letting out a heavy breath as she looked around. "I wish we could stay..."

"Me too, Baby… Unfortunately, we're supposed to report back to the tour bus on the second… And I fear for my safety if Bree doesn't get to spend more time with you before we leave," he laughed, ducking under the table and popping up in front of her. "But we do still have a couple of hours before we need to leave..." he smiled, his hands gliding up the sides of her legs.

"Whatever shall we do?"

"Hmm…" He pulled her up to her feet and held her close, slowly beginning to sway. "You can dance with me."

She smiled and bit her lip. "Seems like we're already doing that, even if it is without music."

Zed rolled his eyes as he spun her around under his arm. "If you want me to serenade you, all you have to do is ask."

She stuck her lower lip out in a pout. "Please?"

"God is that pout lethal..." He leaned down and kissed her softly, running his tongue along her pouty lip. "You love me like nobody  
You like me more than all of my friends..."

"I thought you said I couldn't hear your new song yet," she teased.

"This one I wrote last night after you fell asleep..." he nipped her nose and started to sing again as they slowly danced barefoot across the cold wooden floors of the cabin.  
"And I promise I won't call anybody  
Everything else breaks and bends

But you, said you, you save me each night  
And each morning  
I want nobody but you

You give me my thrills  
You give me the chills  
It kills

I thank god for this feeling every day  
I wonder if he thinks it's okay  
If I worship what is evil as my deity  
And if I'm honest, I don't really care  
And if I'm honest, as long as you'll stay here  
I'll worship you  
I need you  
I adore you, you…" He dipped her low and kissed her.

"I love you like nobody  
I like you more than all my fucking friends  
You're pure as snow but black as the darkness

I thank god for this feeling every day  
I wonder if he thinks it's okay  
If I worship what is evil as my deity  
And if I'm honest, I don't really care  
And if I'm honest, as long as you'll stay here  
I'll cuddle you  
I'll fuck you  
You'll fuck me too…"

"Is that so?" she giggled as he picked her up, wrapping her legs around his waist. Zed nodded, walking them towards the wall.

"'Cause...You love me like nobody..." Her back hit the wall as he stared into her eyes.

"I adore you, Z."

"I love you, Adds...forever."

"And after."

.

* * *

December 31st

"Confidence is a must  
Cockiness is a plus  
Edginess is a rush  
Edges I like 'em rough..."

Addison stole a glance at Zed, throwing him a wink.

"Could you keep your eyes on the road!" Bonzo cringed from the backseat, grabbing onto the door handle as she accelerated through yet another yellow light. "I'd rather not die while listening to Britney Spears!"

"Relax Bonz, she's an excellent driver," Zed laughed, taking her hand and kissing her palm.

"Thank you, Baby," she smiled over to him before continuing to sing along to the radio.  
"Interesting sense of style  
Ten million dollar smile  
Think I can handle that  
Animal in the sack  
His eyes see right to my soul  
I surrender self-control..."

Bonzo's hands went through his hair in frustration. "Addison, I can not for the life of me understand what in the hell a badass rocker chick would be doing singing along with Britney Spears? Seriously! What the fuck is with the Britney obsession."

Zed shook his head, knowing exactly what was going to happen. "Now you've done it..."

Addison slammed on the breaks in the middle of the street. Ignoring the blaring horns coming from behind her, she turned around to face him. "James whatever the hell your middle name is Bonzo… how could you NOT like Britney? Sure she had her cheesy bubblegum pop period at the beginning of her career, but even then she was excellently produced. She broke the mold on bringing female empowerment and sexuality into mainstream music. And I mean, HELLO… do you not remember her epic breakdown? She's a hot fucking mess and damn proud of it. Not to mention the fact that there is a perfect Britney song for every occasion."

"I think you may read too much into her music."

She shrugged and smiled. "That may be, but still… Britney is god and I will not tolerate anyone saying otherwise in my car. So unless you want to walk the rest of the way to the salon, I suggest you zip it buster."

Bonzo cracked a smile as he pretended to zip his lips shut.

"That's more like it," Addison smiled victoriously. She turned back around and started to drive once more.

Bonzo leaned forward between the two front seats. "Is she always this bossy?" he mock-whispered in Zed's direction.

"You have no idea."

"You know you love it when I'm bossy," Addison added as she merged onto the freeway.

"Damn right I do."

"Is it too late for me to choose the walking option?"

Addison shook her head and laughed, turning up the volume.  
"If I said I said I want your body now  
Would you hold it against me"

Thirty long minutes later Addison pulled into the crowded parking lot of Riche Salon.

"Damn… Bree said she was going to be busy, but holy shit this place is packed," Bonzo muttered as they drove through the lot.

"New Year's Eve, one of the salon's busiest days," Addison shrugged. "Luckily for us, I have my own reserved spot!"

"I guess being the owner's best friend has its perks," Zed said as he hopped out the car.

Addison shrugged again. "It's more of a co-owner perk."

Zed and Bonzo both stopped walking and looked at her.

"What?"

"I mean, it's a silent partnership... Like I know anything about doing hair or running a salon," she laughed. "But still..."

Zed scratched the back of his head. "So you're a silent partner in Bree's salon, and you hooked Mason up with a job at Bamm! And gave him the downtown studio?"

Addison nodded. "It was the least I could do. They were both there for me when I needed it the most."

"You never cease to amaze me, Baby," Zed whispered pulling her in for a heated kiss, slowly walking her back towards the car.

Bonzo rolled his eyes and laughed. "Yeah… on that note, I'm going to go find my girlfriend."

Twenty minutes later a very disheveled Addison and Zed walked into the salon.

"Good afternoon Ms. Jacobs."

Addison elbowed Zed as his chest shook with silent laughter. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the bubbly receptionist, "Hi Anna, is Bree available?"

"Let me call up and check." Anna picked up the phone and dialed Bree's extension, briefly frowning when her voicemail picked up. "I'm sorry, she must be busy."

"I'm sure she is," Zed laughed under his breath.

"I can go ahead and sign you in Ms. Jacobs, and..." Anna looked over to Zed smiling a little more than necessary.

"Mr. Jacobs," Addison replied overly friendly.

"Your brother?"

She ran her hand over his chest, possessively. "No."

"Oh..." Anna flushed, looking back down to her computer. "Please feel free to have a seat, I'm sure Bree will be available soon."

"I think I'll just go wait in her office," Addison said plastering an obviously fake smile on her face as she grabbed Zed's hand and started to pull him away from the receptionist's desk and towards the stairs. "I fucking hate that girl..." she mumbled under her breath as she started up the steps.

"Why? She was perfectly nice..."

Addison stopped short and glanced over her shoulder glaring at him.

"You are so fucking hot when you're jealous," he chuckled.

"I am NOT jealous… And I'm always hot."

"Riiiiight…." he smiled, grabbing her ass and following her up the stairs. "I think you're forgetting just how well I know you."

Addison rolled her eyes as she started to open the door to the office."Bree, we really need to talk about that fucking perky… Ahhh! My eyes!"

Zed laughed from behind her as he took in the scene. "Yeah… sorry to interrupt."

"For as many times as I've walked in on the two of you," Bree giggled as she straightened her skirt back out and helped Bonzo to his feet. "You deserved some payback."

Addison shrugged, "Fair point." She walked into the office, sitting down on one of the chairs and spinning around. "So, what's the game plan? I know you're busy as hell… despite the um… break you just took."

Bree laughed, shaking her head. "Stress relief… It was much needed, okay." She rolled her eyes and walked around to the other side of her desk to pull up her schedule. She typed in a few things and looked back up. "You two," she said eyeing up Bonzo and Zed, "downstairs with Stephanie for color and then I'll come down and do your cuts while Addie is processing up here."

"Aww," Bonzo pouted. "Why does she get to stay up here with you."

"Because she has people issues," Bree mumbled.

"I heard that."

"Good."

Addison rolled her eyes and looked over to Bonzo. "I've pretty much been avoiding people I may know for the last few years. Bree usually does my hair at my apartment or, if she's super busy, she'll do it up here."

"And I'm worried she's going to knock out my receptionist one of these days," Bree laughed.

"Like I've

said, nobody is that perky. It's just not natural."

"Alright, enough chit-chat. I'm already running almost thirty minutes behind schedule and I'd like to actually have enough time to get myself ready for the party tonight." Bree scolded, ushering the boys out the door. As soon as she closed her office door she turned around and focused on Addison. "So… she said walking over towards the supply closet to gather the materials she'd need. "How was the trip?"

Addison laughed, catching the smock Bree threw over to her. "Amazing. Just like I told you yesterday."

Bree rolled her eyes. "Yeah, but this is the first time I've gotten to talk to you alone! So… how'd it go?"

She sighed dreamily as she took her shirt off and slipped the smock on. "Bree, there aren't words. I haven't felt like this in so long."

"I'm happy for you Adds. It's about time you two got your happy ending."

She rolled her eyes as Bree started to brush out her hair. "Just because we've sorted out our past and had a completely blissful getaway does not mean we've reached happy ending status. In case you've forgotten, we still need to go back on tour and not act like..."

"Zeddison?"

Addison laughed and nodded. "Exactly. I don't know how I'm going to do it. Especially with my ever-vigilant step-brother."

"You'll find away."

"I hope so."

"How'd Z take it?"

"Take what?"

"Um...Penny?"

Addison was silent.

Bree walked around and sat on top of her desk. "You didn't tell him… Did you."

"No."

"Adds..."

"Don't. Please. I just got him back. I'm fucking happy for the first time in YEARS. Let me have a little bit of happiness before I have to ruin it all!"

"You're not going to ruin it! Don't you think he'd want to know?!"

"Bree! Back off!"

"Aren't you worried about starting back into this relationship lying?"

"I'm not lying!" she snapped. "Just… omitting for a little while."

Bree arched her brow.

Addison sighed heavily. "I told him Christmas Eve night that there were some things I wasn't ready to talk about yet. I'll tell him when the time is right."

ZzZzZzZzZz

"Are you sure you don't want to go?" Zed asked for the five-hundredth time. "I told you, I'm willing to risk getting another tooth knocked out if you do."

Addison giggled and snuggled into his side. "I'm positive, I do not want to go. I'd much rather ring in the new year right here with you… Besides, I don't think Mason's annual New Year's Eve party is the right time to throw myself on his mercy and apologize for sleeping with him and being the world's most terrible friend."

He rolled his eyes and leaned down, kissing the top of her head. "You have not been the world's most terrible friend."

"You're not changing my mind on this one, Z."

"Whatever you say, Baby."

"That's more like it," she said looking up to kiss him.

"Well if you're definitely not going, mind if I borrow your car to go pick up Bree?" Bonzo asked as he sat down on the sofa next to them. "She's still at work."

"Fine by me. Keys are in the basket by the front door."

Zed looked back down at her. "Aren't you going to threaten him like you always do to me when I drive your car?"

She shook her head and smiled. "No."

"So not fair," he teased. "Why do I get threatened?"

"Because you like it," she giggled.

Zed shrugged. "… It is pretty hot."

"Yeah… getting back on tour is definitely going to be interesting," Bonzo laughed as he stood back up. "I'll catch you two in the morning."

"Have fun!" Addison called out after him.

"So… what do you want to do tonight?" Zed asked, running a hand through her snow-white hair.

"Hmm… Horror and chill?"

"That, my dear, sounds perfect. What do you want to do for dinner?"

"I think there may be some leftovers in the fridge..." She looked up to him and smiled, "or we could go grab In and Out."

"Aww, man," Zed moaned. "I could murder an In and Out caveman style burger."

"I think we have a winner," she giggled pulling him down for a kiss.

"Only one problem with that, Gorgeous. Bonz has the car."

She sat up and grabbed his hand. "Well, it's a good thing we have other transportation options then… I just hope it works."

"Hope what works?" he asked as she dragged him towards the garage.

"Oh nothing really," she teased. "Just…." she flipped on the lights and hit the button to open the exterior door. "This!"

There, sitting in the garage next to Dale's Mercedes was his matte black Indian motorcycle.

Zed froze. "Is that…" he whispered, clearly in shock.

Addison's face broke into a large smile. "Yeah, it is."

"How? I thought Mom sold it?" he asked, his voice still not rising above a whisper.

"She did… to me. That way you'd have it when you came back home to me."

He tore his eyes away from the bike to look at her. "She did?"

"Yeah..." she nodded, biting her lip to keep from crying.

"And you kept it? Even after..."

She nodded again, losing the battle with her tears.

He pulled her into him, kissing her until they both needed air. He rested his forehead against hers. "I love you."

"I..."

"I know."

She smiled and kissed him softly. "It should still work. I'm pretty sure it was scheduled to be tuned up last month."

"Seriously?!"

"Yeah… Daddy's car too."

He smiled from ear to ear and kissed her again before he turned and rushed over to his bike. He ran a hand adoringly across the handlebars."I've missed my baby so much!"

"Hey!"

Zed laughed as he kissed the bike. "Adds, you're the love of my life, but this… this beauty was my first love."

"You're lucky I don't get jealous."

He looked over towards her, arching a brow and smirking.

"What? I so do not get jealous."

"Yes, you do. And it's hot as hell every damn time."

She flipped him off while blowing a kiss.

"Deny it all you want, it's still true," he laughed as he straddled the bike and turned the key. He jumped and kicked it started, moaning as the engine roared to life. He looked over to Addison to find her running her tongue along the inside of her lip. "See something you like?"

"Maybe..."

"Maybe?"

She walked up to him, running her finger up his thigh. "I almost forgot how good you look on that bike."

"Well, I haven't forgotten how incredibly sexy you look on it." He reached out and grabbed her roughly, pulling her in for another kiss. "Let's go for a ride, Baby."

"On you or the bike?" she asked breathlessly.

"The bike now, me later."

She straddled the bike and wrapped her arms tightly around his waist. "Oh really?"

"Definitely."

ZzZzZzZzZz

As they finished up their burgers Zed glanced down at his watch. "I have an idea," he said with a smile, looking up and catching her eyes.

"And what would that be?"

"If we leave now, we can make it up to the Hollywood sign in time to catch the fireworks at midnight."

She gasped in excitement, throwing her arms around his neck. "That sounds perfect! Let's do it!"

He smiled and leaned in for a kiss. "Let's go."

They gathered their trash and threw it away before walking hand in hand back over to his bike.

Addison looked down at their joined hands and sighed.

"What's wrong, Baby?"

She held their hands up. "I'm going to miss being able to do this."

He stopped walking, pulling her back into him. "Hey," he whispered, pushing her hair behind her ears. "I told you… we're going to make this work. Is it going to be hard not to kiss you whenever I want? Or hold your hand? Or tell you I love you every five seconds? Hell yeah, it's going to be hard."

Addison laughed and leaned into his touch.

"But we'll find a way."

"Hell yeah we will," she smiled kissing him.

He picked her up, making her laugh, as he walked them over to his bike. "Fuck it. We're not going back on tour! We can just run away together. Just you and me forever."

"If only! That sounds like heaven," she smiled up to him as he sat her down on the seat.

He straddled the bike, kick-starting the engine to life. "Heaven is wherever you are, Baby."

They drove through the cool night, winding their way up the familiar hills towards their spot, finally coming to a stop at the nearest shoulder.

Zed killed the engine and looked around. So much had changed in the week since they were last up here. He turned back towards Addison. "You ready to do this?"

She wrapped her leg around his waist, turning gracefully so that she was now facing him, straddling his lap. "Always… I'll follow you anywhere..." She bit her lower lip, running her tongue along his name. "I adore you."

He smiled and leaned in for a kiss, nipping her lower lip. "I love you so fucking much..." He grabbed onto her ass and stood up. "We could get into so much trouble..." he teased, echoing her words from the first time they had made the climb.

"Carpe Noctum..."

They climbed over the fence and carefully made their way down the rugged terrain towards the base of the letters, before climbing up the ladder on the side of the "H". When they reached the top they both turned to each other, the nostalgia hitting them both. He reached out, taking her hand in his, and pulling her into him.

She rested her head against his chest as they slowly started to sway. "Climb up the H of the Hollywood sign, yeah  
In these stolen moments  
The world is mine  
There's nobody here, just us together  
Keepin' me hot like July forever..."

He twirled her under his arm, pulling her even closer. " 'Cause we're the masters of our own fate  
We're the captains of our own souls  
There's no way for us to come away..."

" 'Cause boy we're gold, boy we're gold  
And I was like…" she slowly started to push his leather jacket off his shoulders.  
"Take off, take off  
Take off all your clothes…."

"I mean, if you insist," he teased, shrugging the rest of the way out of it before unzipping her moto jacket. "They say only the good die young  
That just ain't right  
'Cause we're having too much fun  
Too much fun tonight, yeah..."

She slipped her sweater off over her head as he unbuttoned

his flannel. She pulled him back into her running her hands over his well-defined abs. "And a lust for life."

"And a lust for life."

"Keeps us alive."

"Keeps us alive." He leaned down, capturing her lips in a fiery kiss.

She pulled back breathlessly, desire darkening her eyes. "Then we dance on the H of the Hollywood sign  
'Til we run out of breath..."

"Gotta dance til we die." He twirled her around again, making quick work of the latch on the back of her bra.

"My boyfriend's back  
and he's cooler than ever  
There's no more night, blue skies forever..."

"Cause we're the masters of our own fate  
We're the captains of our own souls  
So there's no need to hesitate  
We're all alone, let's take control...

"Take off, take off  
Take off all your clothes."

"Take off, take off  
Take off all your clothes."

"Take off, take off  
Take off all of your clothes..."

"They say only the good die young  
That just ain't right  
'Cause we're having too much fun  
Too much fun tonight, yeah..."

"And a lust for life"

"And a lust for life"

"Keeps us alive"

"Keeps us alive"

Her hands went to his belt, slowly unbuckling it as she stared deep into his eyes. "My boyfriend's back  
And he's cooler than ever  
There's no stopping now, green lights forever..."

.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I'm sorry it's taken me so long to update! But things have been crazy busy and then I went to Disney (my Disney World obsession has been well documented). But, now I'm back! Next up, back to the tour!**

**So, if you don't follow me on Instagram, you missed an announcement… I'm starting to work on a new story! It's called Call To The Wild, and I'm hoping to have the first chapter posted by the end of the month.**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**Pearl, Austin P McKenzie**

**Radar, Britney Spears**

**Hold it Against Me, Britney Spears**

**Lust For Life, Lana Del Ray ft The Weeknd **


	30. Not Afraid Anymore

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** This chapter is rated ****M.**

* * *

**Chapter 30**

**NOT AFRAID ANYMORE**

"This setlist looks amazing, Adds!" Bonzo exclaimed. "When did you..."

Addison looked over to him from her position on Zed's lap. "While we were up at Big Bear."

"And here I was thinking all you two did was fuck like rabbits."

Zed let out a laugh. "We did that too."

"But we also had some pretty serious talks," Addison added as she stood up and stretched. "One of those talks being about just how serious you guys are about hitting the big league's… You've got the talent, the skills, the desire, and the songs… All I did was rearrange some things to showcase that as best as possible."

Bonzo stood up and hugged her. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

Zed glanced down at his watch for the fiftieth time since they'd arrived back on the bus and sighed, making Addison giggle.

"The answer is still no. I'm not taking the risk of being caught right off the bat."

He smiled and shrugged. "Can't blame a guy for trying."

She rolled her eyes and sat back on his lap. "You sir, are trouble."

"Always have been," he teased, leaning in to nip her nose.

"Hurry up and get it out of your system, you two. Bucky should be here any minute."

"I love you," Zed whispered against her lips. "We're going to make this work. Don't forget that."

"I won't," she said softly, kissing him back.

"Are you sure I can't steal you away? I swear I only need five minutes."

She giggled and pushed his shoulder playfully. "Down boy." She stood back up, throwing him a wink. "How about we get some practice in while we're waiting for everyone to get here?"

Zed's eyes lit up. "Want to work on the new duet?"

"Another duet?" Bonzo asked. "We already have one that we don't even play on stage."

Addison nodded. "Well, I managed to sing with Tracey a little bit before the break… even if it was just that one show… So, who knows," she shrugged. "Maybe I'll be up for attempting another song at some point."

"Besides," Zed added as he grabbed his guitar and plugged in. "It gives us an excuse to get in extra practice together." He wagged his eyebrows, making her smile. "You in Bonz?"

"Sure, as long as I'm playing bass. My ego is still trying to recover from Christmas Eve."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. You're a great bassist and you know it."

"You're better."

"So," Zed laughed. "She's a better guitarist and singer than me too."

"As much as I love the compliments… if we want to get any time in before the bus gets overpopulated once again, we should probably start."

Bonzo grabbed his bass and plugged it into the amp. "Whenever you're ready… I'll jump in once I see where it goes."

Addison took a sip of water and sat down on the bench seat in between them. "How can you see into my eyes like open doors?" she glanced over to Zed and smiled.

"Leading you down, into my core

Where I've become so numb, without a soul

My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold

Until you find it there, and lead it, back, home."

"Wake me up."

"Wake me up inside"

"I can't wake up"

"Wake me up inside"

"Save me."

"Call my name and save me from the dark."

"Wake me up."

"Bid my blood to run"

"I can't wake up"

"Before I come undone"

"Save me"

"Save me from the nothing I've become..."

Bonzo plucked out the perfect accompanying bassline, making both Addison and Zed smile.

"Now that I know what I'm without

You can't just leave me

Breathe into me and make me real

Bring me to life"

"Wake me up."

"Wake me up inside"

"I can't wake up"

"Wake me up inside"

"Save me."

"Call my name and save me from the dark."

"Wake me up."

"Bid my blood to run"

"I can't wake up"

"Before I come undone"

"Save me"

"Save me from the nothing I've become"

Bring me to life"

"I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside"

"Bring me to life...

Frozen inside, without your touch

Without your love, darling

Only you are my life

Among the dead"

"All this time, I can't believe I couldn't see

Kept in the dark, but you were there in front of me"

"I've been sleeping a thousand years, it seems

Got to open my eyes to everything"

"Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul

Don't let me die here

There must be something more"

"Bring me to life"

"Wake me up."

"Wake me up inside"

"I can't wake up"

"Wake me up inside"

"Save me."

"Call my name and save me from the dark."

"Wake me up."

"Bid my blood to run"

"I can't wake up"

"Before I come undone"

"Save me"

"Save me from the nothing I've become."

"Woah… what is going on in here?" Bucky said with a large smile on his face as he stepped onto the bus. "That sounds fucking fantastic!"

"Bucky!" Addison shrieked, jumping up and running over to hug him.

He laughed and hugged her back. "Good to see you too, Casey." He looked over her head to where Bonzo and Zed were sitting. "Everything good?"

Zed smiled, setting down his guitar. "Yeah man, everything is good. Sorry for being a colossal asshole before the break."

"You're forgiven..." he said as Addison let go of him to sit back down. "As long as you keep making music like I just heard."

"That was all Princess," Zed said, throwing her a wink.

Before Bucky could reply, the door to the bus flew open. "Where's my girl?!"

Addison giggled and jumped back up as Tracey dropped his bag and ran towards her, picking her up and spinning her around.

"My god have I missed you! Soooo much tea to spill and we need to catch up like yesterday, and…." he pulled away and looked at her. "And you're smiling…." He gasped and grabbed her hand, pulling her off the bus and across the parking lot.

"Tracey," Addison giggled as he pulled her along.

He stopped short and spun around. "You're back together aren't you?!"

She nodded and smiled even more. "Yeah, we are."

"We're going to go get coffee and you're telling me EVERYTHING!"

ZzZzZzZzZzZ

"Oh. My. God!" Tracey exclaimed for the hundredth time, nearly spitting out his coffee.

Addison giggled, getting on her knees in the booth to lean over the table. "And that was only night one in the cabin." She pulled out her locket from underneath her sweater, opening it up for him.

"Holy shit, Doll-face… Look-it how cute!" he squealed. "Ugh, I swear you guys were made for each other. It's destiny!"

"I don't put the pressure of soulmates, but…" she smiled to herself.

"Okay, so what did you two do the rest of the time at Big Bear?"

She sighed wistfully as she plopped back down into the booth. "So much. We reconnected in every way. We talked, we played music, we caught each other up on what we were doing while we were apart..."

"So you told him about the baby?"

She cringed and looked away. "No… Like I told Bree… I just want a little bit of happiness in my life before I screw it all up again, and right now..." she looked back at him and shrugged. "We're really, really fucking happy."

He grabbed her hand and held it. "And I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure you two stay that way!"

"It's going to be so hard keeping this quiet. If Lacey..."

He held his hand up, cutting her off. "I'll run Lacey interference… if it's even needed. Rumor on the street is that she's been 'getting to know' our new drummer if you catch my drift."

Addison gasped. "Really?"

He nodded vigorously.

"Have you met him?"

"I have… He's super dreamy, too. Not Zed dreamy..." he teased with a wink. "But still. The man can work a kit… I was so hoping he wasn't straight."

"The first musician I meet who isn't at least a teensy-bit queer will be the first," she said with a laugh as she sipped her coffee. "Maybe there's still a chance!"

"I do have a thing for drummers..."

"And guitarists, and bassists," she teased.

"Let's just go with musicians in general," he laughed, looking up as the bell of the diner's door sounded. "Speaking of sexy musicians… looks like yours is walking in."

Addison smiled and turned around just in time to see Zed's face light up as he spotted her.

"Oh you two are so screwed," Tracey laughed.

She spun back around in her seat, with her jaw dropped open. "Hey! I thought you said you'd help!"

"Oh, I will! I'm just saying… those looks you two give each other are a dead give away!"

She picked up a packet of sugar and tossed it at him, laughing as Zed slid into the booth next to her.

"We only have about thirty seconds before everyone else walks in, but I needed to do this," he rushed out, pulling her in for a heated but brief kiss.

"Times up!" Tracey warned as Bonzo, Bucky, and Eliza walked in.

They quickly scooched further apart, trying to hide the large smiles they were both wearing.

ZzZzZzZzZzZ

"So what time is Lacey and..." Addison scrunched her nose as she thought, "Jacey? Is that right?"

Eliza rolled her eyes. "Yeah… Jacey. Who knew there were so many names that ended in A-C-E-Y."

Addison laughed. "And who happened to play music! Anyway, what time are they supposed to be getting in?"

Bucky glanced down at his watch. "They were supposed to be on the same flight as us, but obviously that didn't happen."

"They just boarded," Tracey said as he read a text on his phone. He gasped as he continued to read.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Addison threw another sugar packet at him. "You can't gasp and then tell me 'nothing'. Spill it!"

He dramatically rolled his eyes and passed her the phone.

"You have got to be kidding me! Seriously?"

"What?!" Everyone else around the table asked simultaneously.

"Lacey's sick and on vocal rest."

"WHAT?!" Bucky shouted, grabbing the phone from her and reading the message for himself. "Fucking Christ!" He threw the phone across the table back towards Tracey.

"Easy B, respect the new iPhone, my guy!"

"I can't believe we have to cancel another fucking show. I knew I shouldn't have scheduled one for today..."

"Again, B… easy… take a deep breath," Tracey said inhaling deeply. "Relax…." he exhaled loudly. "Everything will be fine. Zen the fuck out, please."

"Unless you have some miraculous solution for possibly saving the show tonight, I'd suggest you shut the fuck up with the zen and calming breaths!" Bucky said standing up angrily.

"The solution is easy. You have two singers for the band sitting at this table."

Bucky sat back down. "What are you saying?"

Tracey nodded over towards Addison. "This one here has the voice of a fucking angel… Let's see how she does taking lead."

"Oh, no…," Addison said holding her hands up. "I sang one little bridge to one little song in one little show..."

"Casey," Bucky said as calmly as he could, meeting her eyes. "Please? I don't want to develop a reputation for canceling shows. We already had to cancel a few. And with the new dates we just set..."

"Bucky..." she warned. "You know what could happen if I have to sing."

"I'll work with you until soundcheck."

They all looked over to Zed.

"If that's okay?" He asked looking over towards Bucky. He looked back to Addison, trying not to smile. "I mean, you were making some great progress before Christmas."

"What if I can't?"

"But what if you can?" He resisted the urge to grab her hand.

"Choice is yours, Casey. But I need an answer soon. We've still got to get you and Jacey working together, too."

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Fine."

* * *

Addison sat on the stage, staring at her feet as they dangled over the side.

"You ready, Baby?"

She looked up, meeting his eyes as he came back in from turning on the lights.

He stopped dead in his tracks. "Fuck, you're pissed."

She rolled her eyes. "Gee, Zed, what gave it away?" she snapped sarcastically.

He jumped up on to the stage and sat down next to her, pulling her in for a hug despite her feeble protest. "Look at me, Addison," he whispered in her ear, guiding her chin up with his finger.

"What?"

He ignored the venom in her voice, knowing it was just a defense mechanism to hide her fear. "You can do this." She tried to turn away from him, but he held her face firm. "I won't let you fail."

"Why is it so important to you that I sing?" she asked, nearly in tears.

"Because it's who you are. You were born to be in the spotlight."

She rolled her eyes and wiped away a rogue tear. "I can't do it, Z. There's no fucking way… I can't carry a fucking set. A chorus maybe, but not a full show. Even with Tracey singing some..."

"You can… You just need to remember who you are."

She rolled her eyes again. "Okay, Mufasa."

He tickled her side. "Don't be a brat."

"I don't know how else to be."

He stood up, pulling her along with him. "Exactly. You are Addison Fucking Donnelly. Music is in your DNA. It's who you are!"

"I can still make music and not have to sing on stage, Z!"

"No bullshit?"

"Always."

"Despite the fact that you're scared of having a panic attack on stage again, there's still a part of you that wants to prove to everyone, including yourself, that you're more than just your name."

"Z..."

He arched a brow. "I'm not wrong, am I."

She narrowed her eyes. "I'm kind of hating you right now."

"No, you aren't. You love me, just as insanely as I love you."

Her lips turned up in a scowl.

"You know I'm right. About everything," he teased, pulling her in closer until their noses brushed together. "Take the chance, Baby. Carpe Noctum," he whispered, closing the rest of the distance between them and kissing her softly.

ZzZzZzZzZzZ

A few hours later Addison stood in the center of the stage all alone. She grasped the microphone stand tightly and closed her eyes.

"We could be lovers

Would you lie with me?

We could be lovers

Would you lie to me?

And maybe I just want to be saved

But it feels so good

To show you I'm a little insane..." She opened her eyes and met Zed's adoring gaze from across the empty room.

"Yeah, it feels so good

Yeah, it feels so good

Yeah, it feels so good..." She threw him a wink and loosened her grip on the microphone stand.

"He's so lovely, goddamn pretty

In fact, they say he's quite the lover..."

Zed laughed and rolled his eyes. Happy that she was finally relaxing and having fun.

"And he knows what he is

'Cause you told him a million times

And he knows what he does

He walks with you 'round the town just for fun

He's crazy beautiful..."

He blew her a kiss, making her face break out in a large smile.

"I could be your record

Inside of me

Write a record

Don't lose sight of me

And maybe you think I'm insane

But it feels so good

To lock myself inside your little cage

Yeah, it feels so good

Yeah, it feels so good

Yeah, it feels so good..."

"How's it going?"

Zed jumped at the sound of Bucky's voice coming from behind him. He let out a breath, sending up a silent thank-you that their manager hadn't walked in ten minutes sooner when they were naked and hoping that he didn't notice the puddle they had left on the stage. "So far so good. It only took her singing half the Britney Spears catalog to get her comfortable enough to sing an original."

"Think she can do it?"

He locked eyes with Addison again and smiled. "Abso-fucking-lutely."

"Thank fuck," Bucky exhaled in relief. "Casey?!" he called out, interrupting her.

"What's up B?"

"I want to get Jacey up there with you. You ready?"

She hesitated for a moment, glancing over to Zed and shrugging.

"You're ready, Princess," he smiled.

"I guess so then."

ZzZzZzZzZzZ

Zed stood with Bucky in the audience watching as Addison, Tracey, and Jacey worked through the Acey's setlist for the night. He understood why it was important for Addison and Jacey to work together. As the two members in charge of building and maintaining the rhythm of the band, they had to be in sync. They needed to be able to feed off one another's energy and emotion. That didn't mean he had to like it though. And after watching the way Jacey's eyes followed his girlfriend, he definitely didn't like him.

Tracey wiped his forehead and fanned himself dramatically. "Goddamn, Honey-bunny! You're on fire!" he said walking over to Addison and ruffling her sweaty white hair. "If the show is half as good as this rehearsal has been..."

"Let's not get too excited," she laughed nervously. She looked behind her shoulder to Jacey. "How are you holding up?"

He twirled one of his drumsticks absentmindedly. "I'm good. You're making my job easy," he said with a wink. "Wanna work on some call and responses?"

Zed clenched his fists, resisting the urge to jump on the stage and smack the smug look off of his face.

Addison looked down at her watch and shrugged. "Sure. We've still got a little time. Let's see what vibe we can catch…. You start us off."

Jacey smiled and straightened up behind his kit. He cracked off a slow count on his sticks, rolling into a lazy rhythm.

Addison tapped her foot and closed her eyes, gently swaying as her fingers started to pluck out a sultry flow on her bass.

Tracey jumped in adding a haunting chord progression to their building tune.

As the melody evolved Addison opened her eyes and found Zed staring daggers in Jacey's directions. She smiled and bit her lip, knowing exactly what murderous thoughts were going through his head. As hot as she found him when he was jealous, if he didn't relax soon he was going to blow their cover. She stepped up to the microphone once again.

"You're all I need between my sheets

Just you and me

Don't ever slow down..."

His eyes snapped over to her.

"Your hands should be all over me

Your lips, your teeth

Don't ever stop now..." She had his undivided attention once again.

"Out of breath

Out of mind

Addicted to your light

These potions

These potions

Out of breath

Out of mind

Addicted to your light

These potions

These potions..."

She took a deep breath and let the words flow out from her heart, knowing he needed her reassurance that she was all his.

"With a lack of touch, days are gray without you babe

Tell me anything, my lips they fall for it

Glass is full and I'm sipping on the words you say

You've got me drunk on these potions every day

You're all I need between my sheets

Just you and me

Don't ever slow down

Your hands should be all over me

Your lips, your teeth

Don't ever stop now

Out of breath

Out of mind

Addicted to your light

These potions

These potions

Out of breath

Out of mind

Addicted to your light

These potions

These potions

Breathing in these potions

I'm addicted to your light

No more second-guessing

I'm addicted to your light" She fixed him with a stare and ran her tongue along the inside of her lip.

He threw her a quick wink, clearly getting the message she was trying to send. She knew him well. He turned to Bucky. "I'm going to go prep for Zombies soundcheck. I think Princess can handle anything thrown her way tonight."

* * *

The stage was dark. She could sense fans moving below her like a colony of ants. The buzz of anticipation making her knee bounce so hard she couldn't stop it. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. This was it. Her first time back on stage in the spotlight. The beginning of a new chapter. She hoped like hell she didn't panic and fuck it up.

Jacey cracked off a four-count with his drumsticks. The lights came on. Addison froze.

"Shit… she's about to panic..." Zed said frantically as he watched from the curtains. He looked around, spotting a spare amplifier. "I hope this fucking works..." He grabbed his guitar and quickly plugged in, turning the small amp up as far as it would go and strumming out the opening chords of Cherry Bomb.

Addison's eyes popped open as she turned towards the side of the stage, her eyes immediately locking with his. He smiled and gave her an encouraging nod. She visibly relaxed and turned back towards the audience with renewed confidence. She could do this. She glanced at Tracey and nodded.

A soft seductive melody began. The spotlight fell on her as she submitted to the rhythm her bass controlled. Cheers and whistles pierced through the smoke-filled air as she stepped up to the microphone.

"I am not afraid anymore

Standing in the eye of the storm

Ready to face this, dying to taste this, sick sweet warmth

I am not afraid anymore

I want what you got in store

I'm ready to feed now, get in your seat now

And touch me like you never

And push me like you never

And touch me like you never

'Cause I am not afraid, I am not afraid anymore

No no no

I am not ashamed anymore

I want something so impure

You better impress now, watching my dress now fall to the floor

Crawling underneath my skin, sweet talk with a hint of sin

Begging you to take me

Devil underneath your grin, sweet thing, but she play to win

Heaven gonna hate me..." she glanced back towards Zed standing in the curtains, running her tongue along her lower lip and throwing him a wink.

"And touch me like you never

And push me like you never

And touch me like you never

'Cause I am not afraid, I am not afraid anymore

No no no

Crawling underneath my skin, sweet talk with a hint of sin

Begging you to take me

Devil underneath your grin, sweet thing, but she play to win

Heaven gonna hate me..." She closed her eyes, letting the moment wash over her, soaking deep into her core. Zed was right. She was Addison fucking Donnelly and she was born to perform. Her eyes opened and she let out a breath as a shot of adrenaline rushed through her heart.

"And touch me like you never

And push me like you never

And touch me like you never

'Cause I am not afraid, I am not afraid anymore

No no no..."

As the final chords were struck, she scanned the room through the bright lights. People of every size shape and color dotted the pit. All of them cheering at her feet. She had never felt so alive. She laughed into the mic, willing her voice to steady. "How you guys feeling tonight?"

Shouts and appreciative whistles sounded from around the room.

"Well, now that we've got the seductive foreplay out the way… Who's ready to get _fucked_?" She thrust her hips to accentuate the _fuck._

The crowd volume escalated.

She cupped a hand over the back of her ear. "I'm sorry, what was that?"

The cheers and screams became almost deafening.

She smiled and propped her stiletto boot on the monitor, knowing full well the boys below could see up her skirt to the black lace LaPerla panties she was wearing underneath.

Chants of "Fuck us, fuck us, fuck us," started up throughout the crowd.

"Really?" Their calls reigniting the fuel coursing through her blood.

More joined in the cheering.

She turned to Tracey and Jacey with a cocky smirk. "These guys want some. Let's give them a night they'll never forget." She lifted the neck of her bass to her lips and slid her tongue down its length as the three of them tore into the opening of their next song.

Endorphins raided her brain as she lost herself in the moment of communion with her bandmates, the audience, the whole fucking universe. Her flow software engaged, and she rode a wave of total immersion of time, space, and connection for the rest of the set.

As the last song wrapped to excited cheers, she stumbled out of her rock induced daze. Lacey, Bucky, and the members of Zombies all watching from the side.

"Thank you guys for coming out to support The Acey's and for letting me take the wheel for the night! Zombies is up next, so refill those cups, take your pisses, and get ready to be rocked! Good night!"

Claps and whistles took control of the airwaves as the three of them departed the limelight. As soon as they reach the side of the stage Bucky stopped them.

"Band meeting. Greenroom. NOW!"

As they followed after him, Zed subtly grabbed her hand, squeezing it before quickly letting go. She stole a look at him and smiled.

He casually leaned in closer to her. "I have never been so turned on in my life. God do I love you," he whispered before straightening himself back out and winking.

She mouthed the word "Trouble," right before walking into the green room.

Lacey sat in the corner with her arms crossed across her chest and a sneer on her face as Bucky turned around to address the rest of them.

"That was un-fucking-believable!" He said, holding out his arms. "Jacey, my man! Hell of a first show!"

Jacey waved off his comment. "Casey made it easy. The girl knows how to hold down a rhythm. Anytime I slipped, she was right there to get me back up."

Bucky turned to Addison with a look of pride on his face, unable to say what he really wanted to. He took a deep breath and looked to Tracey and then to Lacey. "From now on, I want the set-list evenly split three ways."

Tracey clapped excitedly before hugging on to Addison and jumping up and down.

Lacey stood up, her hands going to her hips defiantly. "May I remind you that I am the lead singer! Not Tracey, and definitely not that snowball!" she screamed, causing her to start a fresh round of coughing.

Eliza casually picked up a can of Lysol that had been sitting on the counter and sprayed it in her direction. "What?" she asked as everyone looked at her. "I don't want to get sick."

They all tried to stifle a laugh as Lacey fumed.

"This is so unfair! This is MY band!"

Bucky rolled his eyes. "And they proved tonight that they don't need you. So if you want to stay in the band, I suggest you accept the changes I just made. The three of you will share stage time. Hell, if Jacey shows himself to be a fantastic singer or songwriter, it might be a four-way split!"

Jacey laughed, holding his hands up. "I drum. That's it."

"Fair enough," Bucky laughed before turning back towards Lacey. "Do I make myself clear?"

Her eyes narrowed. "Crystal," she snapped as she stormed past everyone out the door.

"Well, with that out the way… Zombies, you're up!"

They all cheered and started to make their way back to the stage.

"Casey, Zed..." Bucky called out. "Can I have a word?"

They both nodded, staying behind while the rest of them went back towards the stage.

"Zed," Bucky held out his hand for a handshake. "Thank you."

"For what?" he asked grabbing onto Bucky's outstretched hand.

"For helping Casey work through her stage fright and for knowing exactly what to do when she froze tonight."

Zed smiled and looked over to Addison. "It was my pleasure. She's far too talented to be hiding in the shadows."

"I agree. I expect those duets you two have been working on to find their way into the sets."

"What about Lacey?" Addison asked.

"Don't worry about her. She'll fall in line."

She smiled and rolled her eyes.

"Alright, Z. Go get on stage. We'll be there in a minute."

Zed saluted and stole a quick glance at Addison before running out the door.

"You know, you could have asked if I even wanted to sing on stage going forward..." Addison said once Zed was down the hall.

Bucky smiled, shaking his head. "My bad. Addie-loo, do you want to sing on stage going forward?"

"Yes!" she threw her arms around her brother's neck and hugged him tightly. "Oh My God I forgot just how alive I could feel!"

He laughed and kissed the top of her sweaty hair. "I'm so proud of you, sis!"

"Thank you, B. For making me come on this stupid tour. You have no idea just how much you set things right!"

"Oh, don't go getting all mushy on me," he whispered, before hugging her again. "I've missed happy Addie."

"Who's getting mushy now?"

"Oh whatever, Snowball..." he teased, repeating Lacey's earlier insult, but in a much more loving way. "Let's go see how the new Zombies setlist you put together works out..."

* * *

"You were so fucking incredible tonight," Addison whispered in between kisses as they stealthily felt their way up the darkened stairway leading towards the rooftop.

"Me?" Zed asked as they finally reached the top "You want to talk about incredible…" He opened the door and pulled her outside. "Baby… you were lust personified up there!" The moment the door closed behind them he pinned her against the cold brick wall. "I was rock hard the entire fucking set."

Grinning, she unbuttoned and unzipped his black leather pants. "Seems like you still are. This better be because of me and not that brunette bimbo who's rack you were signing downstairs."

His head rolled back at the feel of her hands releasing him into the cold night. "Just you, Baby. Always. How could I ever want anyone else when I've got my very own fucking rock goddess!"

She dropped to her knees and licked her lips before dragging them over the head of his cock and staring up at him. His eye contact reaffirming his words. "I never did properly thank you for helping me out..." Teasing, sucking, tasting, she took him deep. He grabbed her head and fucked her hungry mouth. The fluid beading at the tip of his cock kissing the back of her throat. She provided a little hint of teeth every few strokes to remind him that she was in charge.

She spit on the head and spread it around with her fingers, enjoying the sensation of cold spit on his hot skin. She ran her tongue up and down the underside of his shaft. His head hit the wall as he hissed a long inhale. His hips returning to the game and thrusting into her mouth.

All too soon she stood and grabbed onto his sack. "I want these slapping my clit."

Grinning, he spun her around and shoved her cheek against the brick, lifting her miniskirt. "My pleasure, Baby."

"Damn right it is," she breathed out in a purr. Her bare ass stung as he smacked it hard.

He leaned over her shoulder as his fingers parted and penetrated her pussy lips. "Brat."

"You know it."

"I also know that I've been jonesing for a taste of your sweet cunt since this afternoon. Think I can get you to spray my face again like you did on stage?"

She shivered in anticipation. A flood of juice leaking down her legs, as she moaned long and hot. Her thighs quivered, losing their strength. She wobbled in his arms. "I wouldn't be opposed to trying." The pounding of his heart against her spine, the warmth of his breath, and the thought of him eating her out adding to the bliss of his finger moving in and out of her. She turned and caressed his rough cheek. His devious gaze bore through her, setting her insides on fire even more. The pleasure fanning out from there, and colliding straight with her heart.

"Give me five minutes with your pussy..." His middle finger still deep inside her, he squared his shoulders. Determination and commitment flared in his eyes. He withdrew and sucked the finger like a popsicle, complete with sound effects.

She bit her lip and moaned, almost coming from the sight. "I'll give you three minutes. Then I'm taking control of the situation."

"Deal." He dropped to his knees. She lifted her Gucci stiletto-booted foot and hooked her leg around his broad shoulders. "I have some great memories of these boots..." Without warning, he dove straight in. Using a combination of his tongue and hand, he stroked and sucked her clit while curling two fingers deep inside her. He pumped his arm fast and hit her straight in the G-spot.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck..." she moaned. He pinned her back and arms against the wall. His head under her skirt, his cock jutting straight out from his leather pants. She twisted her hair into a thick, white rope and bit down on it to keep from screaming his fucking name into the stars.

The cold flipped her tits on high beams, but her skin was on fire. Beads of sweat blooming all over her. She tightened her grip around him as his tongue plunged in and out of her. Another finger gets in on the action. There had to be at least three fucking her now. At that point, she was pretty sure she could take the whole fist. She twisted away, grabbing him by the ears and pulling him up. "Fuck me. Fuck me until I come. I need you so fucking much." She turned around, slid up her skirt, and presented her ass for his viewing pleasure. She met his gaze over her shoulder. "Take me. However you want. Just fuck me."

He arched his brow and grinned, as he licked his hand and pumped his cock. "I love you so fucking much," he breathed out as he speared her pussy.

She threw her head back and bit off the "fuck" on the tip of her tongue. She ground her hips, twisted, and shook. Riding him like a corkscrew, no inhibitions, just embracing the crazy ride.

"That's it, Baby," he breathed in her hear, his lips skipping down the steamed column of her neck.

Yes, God, yes." She reached inside her coat and pulled her bustier down. She grabbed one of his hands and clamped it on her tit.

His other hand slid around front and rubbed her clit. "I'm gonna fill up this sweet little box."

She giggled as another swell of juices ran down her thigh. She needed more. "My ass, Zed. Do my ass like you did the other night in the bath. I wanna spray this fucking wall with cum graffiti."

"I'll lick it off the goddamn bricks," he whispered in her ear.

"Fuuuuuck…."

He paused for a moment. Her legs trembled at the sudden lack of friction. She pulled him out of the front and shoved his rod through the back door. A cry escaped her lips. She couldn't help it. At that point, she didn't care if anyone saw them. In fact, it might have turned her on even more.

His girth filled her, stretching her to the point of ripping. She needed the agonizing pleasure so badly. She needed him.

"Adds… Jesus Christ, you're fucking wild tonight." He grabbed her by the hair and pulled her back to look at him. Their lips falling into a kissing frenzy.

"I thought I'd find you two up here..."

.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: *****Que dramatic music and gasps. Another cliffy! Who could have possibly busted these two? Leave me your guesses in the comments!**

**Please forgive me if this chapter was all over the place. Cold meds are no joke, and I'm loopy AF.**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**Bring Me To Life, Evanescence**

**Crazy Beautiful, Austin P. McKenzie**

**Potions, Car Astor**

**Not Afraid Anymore, Halsey **


	31. Sweet Child O Mine

**Chapter 31**

**SWEET CHILD O MINE**

"I thought I'd find you two up here."

"Oh my fucking God!" Addison disengaged and grabbed her chest. Breaths rushing on a collision course with hyperventilation.

Zed turned around slowly, almost unable to believe the voice that had materialized from behind them. He blinked twice before his face broke out into a large smile.

Addison smoothed her skirt down to cover the mess that they'd made and spun around. "Wyatt!"

"Hey there Pom-poms…"

* * *

Zed yawned and stretched his arms up over his head. As he sat up in bed he took a look around. It was an odd feeling being back in his old bedroom. He'd taken his most cherished items with him when he and his mom made the move down to Santa Monica last summer, but there was still so much that remained here at his house in Seattle. He should have felt at home, but he didn't. Home was no longer gray skies and rain. Home was blue eyes and blonde hair that shined in the hot California sun. He smiled and looked at his bedroom clock. It was already eleven in the morning. He cursed and jumped out of bed, practically running down the stairs towards the guest bedroom.

"Where's the fire, Zeddy?" his mom laughed as he rounded the corner from the stairs by the doorway to the den.

He stopped and poked his head in. "I didn't mean to sleep so late… Addie..."

"Is in the garage with your sister doing cheer stuff."

He relaxed and let out a soft laugh as he walked into the room. "I'm sure Zoey is loving that," he said, sitting down on the couch next to her.

Zyla shrugged. "Thank goodness for Addison… I don't know the first thing about cheerleading."

"Thank you again for letting her come."

She leaned against his shoulder and hugged him. "Well, it was either that or not see you all summer," she laughed. "I'm teasing… you know I love her."

"Is dad..."

"He's at work. And no, he didn't give her any trouble this morning."

Zed let out a sigh of relief. "Well, that's good at least." He stood up and stretched again. "Alright..." he said with a smile. "Off to the garage."

Zyla laughed again as he walked off. "Breakfast is in the kitchen if you're hungry!"

"Thanks, Mom!" he called back over his shoulder. He made his way through the kitchen, grabbing a biscuit off the pan, and through the door to the garage. He froze the second he walked in. In the year since he had been gone, the garage had been transformed into a complete cheer gym. "Woah..."

"Zeddy!" Zoey exclaimed as she launched herself into his arms.

He smiled and picked her up, swinging her around. "Morning, short stuff… I hear you've had a busy morning so far."

She nodded excitedly. "I've been helping Addison come up with a new routine!"

"You have?" he looked over to the practice mat where Addison was sitting, noticing the full Seabrook High practice uniform and the worried look she was wearing. "Hey… what's going on?"

"I've been out of town for less than a day and I get this!" she fumed as she stood up, handing her phone over to him.

He set Zoey down and wiped the sleep out of his eyes as he read the text. "Officer try-outs?"

"Yeah. Keep reading."

He looked back at her phone and continued to read. "Seriously? They're making you re-audition, even if no one challenges?"

"Yeah. Apparently, there are some people who believe that the same person shouldn't be HBIC three years in a row. So, now I have to compete for my spot against the entire squad."

"What's HBIC?" Zoey asked.

"Head..." Zed caught himself from saying the rest. "...um… Blonde in Charge..." he lied very unconvincingly as he raised a brow towards Addison.

Addison bit back a laugh. "Yeah… we'll go with that." She looked over towards Zoey. "It's what we call the cheer captain at our school."

"They don't want you to be captain? But why?"

"Because they're traitorous, back-stabbing, no-goo..."

Zed clapped a hand over Addison's mouth and smiled at his little sister. "Because nobody in the history of the school has ever had the chance to be cheer captain as long as Addie has. But..." he removed his hand from Addison's mouth and picked Zoey up. "Addie is also the best cheerleader ever!" he mocked whispered. "She's got nothing to worry about."

Addison's heart melted. "Awww… thank you..."

"It's true," he said softly as he set Zoey back down and took a step closer to her. "You know you've got this thing tied up."

She took a step closer to him as well and smiled up at him. "Nice choice of words."

He threw her a wink and leaned in closer.

"Are you two going to kiss?"

Zed pulled back and laughed. "Well not anymore..." he reached out and ruffled Zoey's hair just as the sound of the doorbell chimed.

"I'll get it!" Zoey rushed out as she pushed past them to run back into the house.

Zed laughed again. "God I've missed that kid…" he looked back at Addison and gave her the smile he saved just for her. The one he knew drove her wild. "… And I missed you last night."

She pulled her lower lip between her teeth. "I missed you too, but there was no way I was sneaking upstairs with your parent's room next door… Your Dad hates me enough."

"To be fair, he doesn't hate you… It's me he has the issues with… but enough about him," he whispered against her lips. "I can't wait until tonight."

She bit his lip and pulled. "Me either… should be fun."

He grabbed her ass and lifted her up, making her giggle.

"Really, Zedward? You ruined my chance at happiness for some preppy pink cheerleader?"

Zed rolled his eyes and pulled back. "Wynnie, it's not my fault you got dumped."

"Don't call me that! And, yeah… it pretty much is. When you pulled the dick move of breaking up over the phone, who do you think she went and cried to? That's right, her twin brother. Guess who broke up with me the next day, her twin brother… so yeah, Z,... It is your fault… well, you and Pom-poms over there."

"Wow…" Addison smiled as she shimmied back down to her feet. "Preppy pink cheerleader and pom-poms… I don't think your friend likes me very much."

"That's just Wynter," Another voice said from behind them. "She can be a bit much sometimes."

Zed's face lit up. "Wyatt!"

"Long time no see man!"

The two friends hugged as Zoey and another one of Zed's friends walked in.

"Adds, this is Wyatt, Willa, and Wynter," Zed said looking back at Addison. "My best friends and old bandmates."

"Old bandmates?" Wyatt said as he draped an arm around Willa's shoulder. "Did you hear that, sister?"

"I did… guess he has forgotten about us."

Zed laughed and shrugged. "I could never forget you guys… I just didn't think you still counted me as a part of the Wolf Pack."

"Once you're in the pack, you're in for life," Wyatt added with a smile. "We're family."

"We were just about to get some practice in...you up for joining, Zedward?" Willa asked with a smirk. "If you can tear yourself away from Pom-poms, that is."

Addison smiled politely, resisting the urge to tell her off for Zed's sake.

Zed squeezed her hand. "I still hate that nickname, so much… and no, I don't think so… I'm not leaving Adds behind."

"Bring her with," Wyatt said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Oh, I doubt some cheerleader would want to have to listen to a garage band practice," Wynter sneered.

Addison bit the inside of her cheek before smiling. "Actually… I'd love to hear you guys play."

"Awesome!" Wyatt smiled. "Z… Grab your guitar, maybe put on a shirt... and we'll see you over there."

"See you in a few!" Zed said, giving him a high-five.

Willa rolled her eyes as she gave them a final look before walking out with Wynter.

Wyatt shook his head. "Don't worry, they'll warm-up," he reassured her following them out the door.

"Well..." Addison whispered as she watched Wyatt walk back into the house. "That went well."

"Addison?" Zoey asked, pulling on the hem of her shirt. "Why didn't you tell them you're a musician too?"

Zed smiled and ruffled his sister's hair. "Because sometimes it's more fun to show people instead of telling them."

"What?"

Zed smiled again and looked at Addison. "When I give you the signal, jump in."

She rolled her eyes and giggled. "You sure?"

"Absolutely."

"I wanna come!" Zoey chimed in.

"Ask Mom."

Zoey clapped excitedly and raced back into the house.

"Z… I don't want to cause problems with you and your friends… I can stay here and work on my routine some more, or help your sister with a few stunts she was asking about..."

He grabbed her by the waist and kissed her hard, bending her back as he did so. "They're going to love you… They're just a tough pack to get close to."

"Mommy said YES!… Ewwww…."

Zed laughed and stood up straight, righting Addison as well. "Why don't you go on ahead pip-squeak. I'm going to grab my guitar."

Zoey narrowed her eyes. "Are you sure you're not just going to kiss your girlfriend again?"

"If you don't go, I'm going to kiss her again in front of you."

She cringed and pretended to gag. "Why are teenagers so gross..." she mumbled to herself as she walked back into the house once more.

Addison smiled and kissed his cheek. "Did you just send your sister off by herself?"

Zed nodded. "Yeah."

"Isn't that kind of dangerous?"

"Wynter lives next door."

"Ooooh…," she whispered with a soft giggle. "Well in that case..." she pulled his face to hers and kissed him again. "What do I need to know before we go over there?"

He laughed and grabbed her hand, leading her back into the house. "Well, Wynter has been my neighbor forever. And Wynter and Wyatt are cousins."

"And Willa is Wyatt's sister?"

"Legally, sort of..." he said as they climbed the stairs to his bedroom. "But she's been his girlfriend since the 6th grade."

Addison stopped walking and grabbed his arm. "What was that?"

Zed laughed and opened his bedroom door. "They like to joke around that they're brother and sister. But the truth is that Willa's parents travel with Doctors Without Borders and Wills got tired of moving. So, Wyatt's parents offered to take her in for high school."

"That's kind of awesome."

"It is… except for the fact that they never have ANY privacy. You think we have it bad right now? Imagine never having the house to yourself ever."

Addison shuddered at the thought. "I'm so glad we have ample privacy back home… It's going to be hard keeping my hands off of you for the next few weeks."

Zed smiled and stalked towards her, closing his door as he pinned her against it. "You know what else is hard..." he whispered into her ear.

"ZED! THAT DOOR BETTER BE OPEN!"

He let out a frustrated laugh and rested his forehead against hers. "And this is why we're going out tonight."

Addison giggled and ran her hands across his bare shoulders before pushing him away playfully. "I can't wait to play with you."

He bit her lip and kissed her before opening the door back up. "IT IS!" he called out down the stairs to his mom. He shook his head and grabbed a flannel and his guitar. "Let's go, Beautiful."

As they walked outside they could already hear music coming from the garage next door.

_...White light my time has come_

_All night out on the run from black magic..._

Zed stopped and listened with a smile on his face. "Willa is finally getting a chance to sing… good for her."

… _Black magic_

_Black _

_Black magic..._

"Good cover of a good song… She's got a great voice..." Addison whispered with a look of concentration creasing her brow. "a little pitchy in spots, but the potential is there..." her eyes widened at what she had just said. "Please don't repeat that! I don't need her to not like me even more!"

He laughed and hugged her. "My lips are sealed… but you're right, you know. She is a little pitchy."

"And unless my opinion is asked, I'm keeping my mouth shut," she giggled. "Besides, Dexy Valentine has a hard to replicate voice… Did you sing lead before you left?"

He nodded his head. "Yeah, Wyatt and I used to trade-off. The girls would sing back up and the occasional chorus."

"How chauvinistic of you," she smiled sweetly up to him as she playfully flipped him off.

He smiled even wider before biting her finger. "We're the ones that started the band. The girls tagged along…which was good because we needed a bass player and a drummer. And Wynter provided the practice space when Pops booted us out..." he laughed, leaning down to open the garage door.

"Give me the final piece

That holds the puzzles end

Of all the billions of stars

That are the dreams of your friends

How could anyb..."

Willa stopped singing and slung her bass behind her. "Holy shit!" she exclaimed as she took a few steps closer to them. "Is that a Les Paul?"

Zoey walked up and held out her hand. "Pay up."

Willa shook her head. "I swear half the money I make babysitting you goes right into your piggy bank, munchkin."

Zed laughed and ruffled his sister's hair, "Good job." He smiled and looked down adoringly at his guitar. "And yeah, it sure is."

"How in the ever living fu..." she stopped and looked at Zoey. "I stopped myself…"

Zoey nodded and went to sit back down on the sofa, dragging Addison along with her.

"How did you get a Les Paul?" Willa whispered, almost in awe.

He smiled and glanced over to the sofa. "It was my birthday present from my super hot girlfriend." He blew her a kiss, making her giggle.

"Well, at least she's got good taste in guitars," Wyatt said as he flashed her a smile. "The same can't be said for her taste in men."

Zed flipped him off.

"Zed, you owe me a dollar!"

He rolled his eyes. "It only counts if I say it, Zo."

"Are you done?" Wynter asked from behind her drum kit. "I'd like to keep practicing."

Zed shrugged. "Sure..." he looked over to Addison again. "Any requests, Baby?"

Wynter rolled her eyes. "Why does she get to pick?"

Zed threw Addison another wink before turning to face Wynter. "Fine, what do you want to play, Wynnie?"

"Don't call me that!" she practically growled. She closed her eyes and took a deep calming breath. "Well, since you don't know any of our new stuff, how about we stick with a cover? Maybe the last song we performed together at the end of the year talent show Sophomore year?... You know, BEFORE you abandoned us..."

Zed bit back a laugh. This was going to be too easy. "Alright… If that's what you want to do."

"It is what I want to do" she answered back in a mocking tone.

"Fine..." Zed plugged into the amp and adjusted the settings on the foot peddle. "Let's do this…Wyatt, you take the first verse, I'll take second..."

Wyatt shook his head and smiled. "Look at you, falling right back into taking control… I missed you."

Zed smiled shyly and looked back over to Addison as he began to pluck out the opening melody of Sweet Child O' Mine.

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me..." Addison mumbled under her breath.

"What? Is that a song you don't know?" Zoey whispered back.

"I know it all right..."

"What's the signal?"

"You'll know it when you see it, kiddo..."

Zoey practically buzzed with excitement as Wyatt started to sing.

"She's got a smile it seems to me

Reminds me of childhood memories

Where everything

was as fresh as the bright blue sky…."

Addison's eyebrows shot up. She hadn't known what to expect, but she was definitely impressed. Wyatt could sing.

"Now and then when I see her face

She takes me away to that special place

And if I'd stare too long

I'd probably break down and cry"

Willa and Wynter jumped in and sang the chorus.

"Oh, oh, oh

Sweet child o' mine

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Sweet love of mine."

Zed caught Addison's eyes and blew her another kiss as he took over the next verse.

"She's got eyes of the bluest skies

As if they thought of rain

I hate to look into those eyes

And see an ounce of pain..."

Addison sighed dreamily. She'd never tire of his voice, or the way his eyes locked with hers as he sang, or of the way his muscles moved as he played...

"Her hair reminds me of a warm safe place

Where as a child I'd hide

And pray for the thunder

And the rain

To quietly pass me by."

"Oh, oh, oh

Sweet child o' mine

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Sweet love of mine..."

As the girls sang, Zed bit his lip and arched his brow.

"Sit back and enjoy, Zo..." Addison whispered as she stood up from the old couch and walked over to stand in front of him.

"All yours, Baby," he mouthed as he held his hands up.

"What are you…." Willa started to ask, only to be cut off by the sound of Addison executing Slash's guitar solo to perfection as she played Zed's guitar backward.

"Holy shit!" Wyatt exclaimed as he shook his head in disbelief.

"That's a dollar, Wyatt!" Zoey giggled from her spot on the couch.

"Sorry, Zo!" he called over.

"Don't worry, I'll let it slide!"

Wyatt smiled and mouthed "thank you."

"You want to take the rest of the vocals?" Zed asked as Addison continued to play.

She bit her lip and nodded.

Wyatt laughed as he started to sing back up again. "Where do we go, where do we go now..."

Zed took off his guitar and placed it on Addison. They all watched in amazement as she ripped through the bridge and sang the rest of the song flawlessly. As she struck the final chord and drug it out on the whammy bar, Zoey and Zed broke out in furious applause.

Everyone else was silent as they stared at her.

"How in the he..." Willa stopped herself and stole a quick glance at Zoey. "..World..."

Zed started to laugh as he pulled Addison into him and kissed her, ignoring Zoey's dry heaves from the couch. When they pulled apart he looked back towards his friends. "We're both in the music program at Seabrook High, and this one here is at the top of the class… She could have done that with any song, but a Guns n Roses song, especially that one?" he shook his head. "Yeah, I couldn't have planned that better."

"Guns n Roses fan?" Wynter asked. "Because if so, you are totally forgiven and we will get along just fine. Literally my favorite band of all time."

Addison laughed nervously. "Yeah, something like that."

"So is Sweet Child o Mine your favorite?" she asked excitedly.

"Not really. I just know it, really, really, really well…"

Wynter stood up from her kit and gave her an odd look.

"Just tell her, Baby," Zed laughed.

"I'd rather not..." she whispered through her teeth, faking a smile.

Wynter rolled her eyes. "Tell me what?"

Addison glared at Zed. "Fine…." she took a deep breath and looked at her. "It's a great song but I can't stand it…"

"Why the hell not?"

"Wynter!" Zoey fussed.

"Oops… sorry…" she felt around in her pockets. "Can I get a rain check?"

Zoey sighed dramatically. "That's what you said last time, too. You owe me..."

"I know, I know..." Wynter laughed before looking back over to Addison, waiting for an answer."

Addison sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "It was written about my mom."

"Wait, what?" Wynter said in shock as she stood up from her kit and walked over towards them. "But that song was written about Missy Wells who Axl Rose was dating until right after Use Your Illusion II was recorded when she broke up with him for their producer..."

Zed arched a brow in her direction.

"What? Don't give me that look. I kick ass at 80's music trivia. Especially about GNR."

Addison dropped her head into her hands and silently cursed. "Of course you do?"

"Do you have a problem with that Pom-poms?"

She looked back up. "Not at all, it's just..." she looked over to Zed. "You're in serious trouble for this one. Got it, Jacobs!"

He swallowed and nodded.

Addison held out her hand. "Addison Donnelly. Nice to meet you."

Wynter's eyes went wide. "Donnelly? As in Dale Donnelly? And Missy Wells Donnelly..." her breaths started to come out quickly. "Holy… Oh my god, I need to sit down," she mumbled to herself as she stumbled over towards the sofa, collapsing next to Zoey.

"Care to fill in the rest of us?" Wyatt asked through a laugh.

Wynter threw a throw pillow towards him. "Our boy is dating the daughter of the biggest producer of all time and an 80's music video legend! You could have told us, Zed!"

"I don't think of her like that," he looked at Addison and squeezed her hand. "She's just my Addie."

"Don't think you're not still in trouble, mister," Addison mumbled under her breath, despite the smile spreading across her face.

"I really didn't know, Baby."

Wyatt laughed and stepped over towards her. "It's true… Wynnie just started getting really into 80's hair bands last summer"

"Don't call me that!" Wynter growled.

Wyatt ignored her and held out his hand. "It's nice to meet you, Addison… Welcome to the pack."

"Woah… hold up," Willa said as she took off her bass and set it down. "Just because she can play, and she's dating Z, and Wynter is giving her heart eyes from over there, does not make her one of us!"

"Willa..."

She held up a hand cutting Wyatt off. "You may have won over these three over, but you haven't earned my trust. Tonight. Power Plant. 7 sharp."

Zed rolled his eyes. "Wills, we have plans tonight. And my girlfriend doesn't have to prove anything to you or anyone."

"True… but, it'd be nice to hang out," Wyatt offered. "I can't remember the last time we all went to the old Power Plant. Besides, don't you wanna show Addison where we used to play?"

"But… we have plans..." Zed whined.

Addison smiled and elbowed him. "Z… You haven't seen them in ages… you should hang out with your friends..." She pulled him down so that she could whisper in his ear. "I promise you can tie me up again another night."

He swallowed loudly before looking back over to Wyatt. "We're in."

"One question…" Addison asked as she looked between the two of them. "What's Power Plant?"

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** I can honestly say, despite the NUMEROUS great guesses, no one guessed Wyatt! But then again… new character. I'd been trying to figure out how to introduce the Z2 ****wolves into the story, and so the idea of them being Zed's old garage band friends from Seattle came about. Next chapter will be a partial flashback as well and will fill in even more of their backstory. Sorry this chapter was so short, but I'm struggling to find "alone" time to write with EVERYONE always around these days. Crazy quarantine. Hope everyone is staying home and staying healthy!**

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

**-Black Magic, Magic Wands**

**-Sweet Child O Mine, Guns N Roses**


	32. S&M

**CHAPTER 32**

**S&M**

"Ooooh," Addison laughed as they pulled up to a large building on the outskirts of town. "It's literally an old power plant!"

Zed laughed and passed her the backwood to finish. "Yeah. It was built in the twenties and was fully operational until about ten years ago. It turned into this crazy multi-level music venue shortly after."

She took a deep drag. "Are you sure I'm dressed okay?"

He laughed again and grabbed her hand. "Why are you so nervous? It's very off-brand for you… You know you always look hot."

She rolled her eyes. "I know that… But…" she shrugged. "I sort of feel out of my element… maybe I should have worn jeans..."

He took the backwood back and put it out. "Baby, it's just an open mic night... And that skirt is deadly… if we weren't already running late..." he ran his hand up her thigh.

She smiled and pushed his hand away. "But it's your friends… and people you grew up with… and..." she shrugged her shoulders and sighed.

"Adds, look at me," he whispered as he ran a hand down the side of her face, pulling her in closer. "Wynnie and Wyatt already love you… and Willa will too whenever she decides to stop being a bitch and give you a chance."

"It's not just them."

"I don't give a shit about anyone else... You and me… forever..."

"And after," she breathed as his lips met hers.

His hands went to her hair, pulling her in deeper, only to be interrupted by a sharp knock on the window.

Zed rolled his eyes and pulled away, rolling down the window. "Can I help you?"

Wyatt laughed and poked his head into the car. "You know your Dad is going to be pissed if his car smells like pot. You better air it out before you get home tonight."

"You're just jealous you missed out."

He shook his head and smiled. "Maybe a little…. How did you even convince him to loan you the jag?"

"That was all my mom."

"I love that woman," Wyatt smiled. He looked over at Addison. "You excited Pom-poms?"

Addison popped a piece of Juicy Fruit into her mouth and nodded as she handed one to Zed.

"Thank you, Baby," he whispered, grabbing her hand and giving it a small squeeze.

"Let's go then!"

"Where are the girls?" Zed asked as he got out of the car.

"Already inside. We knew you'd be late and Wynnie wanted to make sure she got a good spot on the line-up." Wyatt replied as he jogged around the car to open the door for Addison.

Zed rolled his eyes. "Always the gentleman."

"Damn right," he laughed, placing a kiss on Addison's hand as he helped her out of the car. "Someone's got to be."

"Thank you, Wyatt," she smiled, looking over to Zed as he walked over to them. "And don't let him fool you, Jacobs over there can be quite the gentleman as well."

"Thank you, Baby," Zed laughed draping his arm around her.

"So..." Wyatt said, draping his arm around her as well. "What is a girl like you doing with a guy like Zed?"

"Hey!"

Wyatt laughed. "No offense, Z."

"How can I not take offense!"

Addison giggled and leaned into Zed's shoulder as they continued to walk through the parking lot. "I don't think I ever really had a choice. We tried to just be friends…"

"Longest month and a half of my fucking life."

She giggled again. "The harder we tried to fight this, the stronger it got… until one night..."

Wyatt laughed. "Bet I can guess when that was… I still can't believe you broke up with Nat over the phone at like one in the morning."

"That was my fault," Addison said. "I told him to call her… I don't share."

"To be fair, I offered to call and break things off the morning after your birthday party."

"True..."

"What happened at your birthday party?"

Zed shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "Oh, the usual… a tab or two of X, live music… a killer make-out sesh that we pretended didn't happen for a while..."

Wyatt shook his head and laughed. "You two really did try, didn't you?"

"Yeah… we did."

"Well, dick move or not, you two seem really happy together… Which is more than I can say about you and Natalie. I've seen you smile more today than I saw in the year before you left."

Zed kissed the top of Addison's head. "How could I not smile and be happy… I love you."

"I love you, too… forever."

"And after."

"Awwww…" Wyatt gushed. "You're so cute."

Zed rolled his eyes and pushed him away from them as they approached the line to get in the door. "What in the..."

Wyatt laughed and draped his arm around Zed. "Yeah, they finally started carding out here, too. I guess they got tired of all of us sneaking onto the upper floors."

"What's on those?" Addison asked.

"21 and over….Downstairs is all ages. We used to be able to get past the one security guard to get upstairs to buy drinks… Not so much anymore."

"Sucks to be you," Zed laughed as he pulled out two ID cards from his wallet, handing one to Addison.

She took it from him and examined it. "Wow, Owen really did a good job. It looks perfect!"

"How old are you Pom-poms?"

Addison rolled her eyes at the use of her apparent new nickname. "According to this, 21."

"And according to your California issued ID?"

"Seventeen."

Wyatt smiled. "Such a baby still."

Her eyebrows shot up. "Baby, huh" she smiled and bit her lip. "… question… Do they have concerts here?"

"Yeah, the top floor is a huge concert stage. They get some pretty major names roll through here."

She nodded her head. "I bet you a drink I don't even need to use this," she challenged holding up her new ID card.

"Seriously?" he looked over to Zed for confirmation.

Zed held his hands up and took a step back from them.

"And I'll bet you two drinks I can get you two in as well," she smiled sweetly.

Wyatt looked back to Zed. "Is she serious?"

Zed shrugged his shoulders and bit back a laugh, knowing exactly what was about to happen.

"Okay," Wyatt smiled. "You're on. And if you get rejected, I'm picking out a song for you to sing on stage."

Addison held out her hand. "Deal." As they shook she locked eyes with him. "Just so you know… I don't lose."

"Neither do I."

Zed rolled his eyes dramatically as they moved up in line. "Why am I attracted to the ultra-competitive ones?" He stopped dead in his tracks and turned back to them, quickly stammering out an explanation. "I mean that in a totally not physical attraction kind of way!"

"So, you're not attracted to us?" Wyatt teased, elbowing Addison playfully. "I think we're pretty hot!"

"I… I..."

Addison smiled and grabbed Zed's hand, "We'll discuss this more later," she whispered with a wink as they stepped up to the bouncer.

"ID..." the large, intimidating man gruffly stated, crossing his arms in front of him, making his muscles bulge even more.

Addison reached into her wallet, pulling out a business card and handing it to him.

"This isn't an ID."

"Yes, it is," she said, batting her eyelashes and flashing him a smile. "Flip it over."

The bouncer huffed in annoyance as he turned the card over. As he read, his eyes grew larger. He looked between her and the card several times before hitting the call button on his walkie talkie. "I need a VIP table reserved for…" He looked up to Addison. "How many, Ms. Donnelly?"

"Five...maybe more."

He nodded. "At least five." He handed the card back to Addison and pulled out a small stack of gold wrist bands. "Enjoy your evening at the Power Plant. If there's anything you need, please don't hesitate to ask."

"Thank you," she smiled turning towards Zed and Wyatt. "Let's go boys."

As they walked through the entrance, Wyatt started to laugh. "What in the fuck just happened?"

"I told you I don't lose… looks like you owe me a few drinks." She stopped walking and smiled even wider. "Wait, those are comped… I guess I'll have to come up with something else."

Wyatt swallowed loudly before he answered with a smile of his own. "You are something else, Addison..."

"Oh, so now I'm Addison?" she said with a breathy giggle.

He shook his head and took a step back, looking between the two of them. "So are either of you going to tell me how we're suddenly on the VIP list?"

Addison flashed the same card she had given the bouncer. "Next to my car, this was the best thing I got for my sixteenth birthday. My Bamm! Records executive card."

Wyatt's jaw nearly hit the ground.

"I don't normally like to throw around my last name, but..."

"It's gotten us into some pretty awesome shows," Zed laughed as he clapped him on the back.

"But..." Wyatt looked between the two of them. "If you have that, why did you just get fake ID's?"

Zed scratched the back of his head as he stole a heated glance towards Addison. "We, um… were planning to go to a… non-music based club while we were in town."

"Wher…."

"There you guys are!" Wynter shouted, interrupting him. "I'm up next!" she said as she ran past them carrying a guitar.

Wyatt looked back at Zed and Addison. "To be continued… Let's go watch Wynnie make an idiot of herself."

Wynter came rushing back over, almost out of breath. "Oh," she panted. "One more thing… I had nothing to do with it! K! Bye!"

"Woah, wait a sec..." Zed said, grabbing her arm. "Since when do you play guitar?"

"You taught me, remember?"

"I only taught you three chords."

She pulled her arm away and smiled. "That's all I need!" She waved and ran back off.

"What was that all about?" Zed asked, turning to Wyatt.

"It's Wynter. Who knows," he laughed, shaking his head. "Come on. Wills texted and said they were upfront."

They made their way through the crowd, sporadically stopping to say hello to friends, shaking hands, and slapping palms. As they approached the stage, Wyatt stopped walking.

"You have got to be kidding me..." He turned to Zed and Addison with wide eyes. "I swear, I had no idea..."

"What are you..." Zed's voice trailed off as he finally spotted what Wyatt had. "Well..." he said with a forced smile, looking at Addison. "Looks like our night just cleared back up. Let's get out of here." He squeezed her hand and turned back around.

"Zed, man… I'm sorry."

"What is going on?" Addison asked, stopping him from walking any further.

Before he could answer, they all heard Willa call out to them.

Zed sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Adds… my ex-girlfriend and her friends are at the table next to ours."

"Oh..."

"I'm not about to put you in that position, Baby."

She rolled her eyes and smiled, squeezing his hand. "Alpha and Omega?"

"Forever and after," he answered pulling her closer to him. "You know that."

"Then why are you stressing? Let's go watch Wynter."

He arched a brow. "Seriously?"

"Yeah… Besides, you had to go to school with my ex for an entire year. I think I can handle one night."

"I also punched him out… and you two were already broken up BEFORE we met."

She shook her head and smiled, looking up at him through her lashes. "True..."

"Don't give me that look."

She ran her tongue along her bottom lip, pulling it between her teeth. "What look."

"That one, right there," he laughed. "I'm going to end up dragging you out of here and fucking you in the backseat of my Dad's car… If we make it that far."

"And that's why I'm not worried!" she smiled victoriously, standing on her tippy-toes to peck his cheek. "You're mine, just as much as I'm yours."

"So you're staying?" Wyatt asked hopefully.

Zed laughed nervously and pulled Addison into his side. "I guess so..."

They made their way to the table just as Wynter took the stage.

Zed scowled towards Willa.

"What?" she asked innocently.

"We're having a little chat once Wynter is finished," he whispered, pulling Addison onto his lap as he sat down, ignoring the glares coming from the table next to them.

"Hi everybody!" Wynter said excitedly as she adjusted the microphone. "I'm Wynter Barkowitz and I'll be playing a little song for you today so… Here we go...

It's just a stupid little love song

It's just a stupid little

It's just a stupid little love song..."

Zed followed Wynter's gaze to see who she was eyeing as she sang. He rolled his eye. "She seriously isn't over Taylor?" he asked Wyatt.

"Here we go

Put em' up

Put em' up, put em' up..."

Wyatt shook his head.

"No, she isn't you selfish prick," Willa snapped.

"Again! Not my fault!"

"Again, yes it is! Of course, he was going to dump her when you dumped his sister!"

"They were only together for three months!"

Wyatt cleared his throat and motioned towards the stage, making them both roll their eyes and focus back on Wynter.

"Your grandpa fought in world war two

Your cousin landed on the moon

Your mother is a diplomat, the senator of Connecticut

Your sister's got a 4 point O

Your father's got his own talk show

Your brother aced the science test, he found the cure for morning breath

I came here by taxi

You came by limousine

And all I have to offer you is this

Just a stupid little love song

3 chords and a microphone

Just a stupid little love song

hip hop and rock and roll

So sit right down I'll sing this song to you

Put em' up

Put em' up, put em' up..."

"Someone has a crush..." Addison whispered into Zed's ear. "Look that way… tall, long dark hair..."

He glanced to his right and smiled. "That's Jay. He goes to St. Andrew's across town. He took a few guitar lessons from me over at the music store… nice guy."

"Well, he hasn't taken his eyes off of Wynter since she started singing."

"The captain of the football team

The cheerleader's recurring dream

You're on the road to Harvard Law..."

Zed smiled again. "I don't know why I never thought of it before. They'd actually be perfect together."

"Wanna try to set things right?"

He kissed her cheek. "I'll see what I can do, Baby," he whispered in her ear as Wynter hit the final chord of her song.

Everyone around the table stood up and screamed as they clapped for her. Just as Addison went to sit back down she was shoved forward.

"Oops..." a sickeningly sweet voice called out.

She turned to see Zed's ex-girlfriend, Natalie, walk by. She forced a smile to her face and sat down. "Guess I deserved that one."

"You don't," Zed replied harshly, glaring at Natalie and her group of friends. He shook his head and turned to Willa. "You and me, let's go."

"What did I do?" she snapped, earning a look from Wyatt. She held her hands up. "Fine… I'll meet you over by the bar."

He leaned down and kissed the top of Addison's head. "I'll be right back, beautiful. Want anything non-alcoholic to drink?"

She giggled at the distaste in his voice. "Diet Coke?"

"You got it, Baby..." he kissed her cheek and stood up, motioning for Wyatt.

Wyatt followed him a few paces away from the table."What's up?

"Dude, keep an eye on Addie… please."

"I highly doubt she'd do anything, man. She's amazingly chill."

"I know, but Nat would. And Adds doesn't back down. She might look like a cinnamon roll, but she's got a right hook that could knock a grown man on his ass. Natalie would be on the ground before she managed to get off a pop of her gum."

Wyatt laughed and bit his lip in amusement. "If I'm being honest, I'd totally be okay with that."

Zed shook his head. "You never did like her."

"Nope. Pom-poms, on the other hand…"

Zed eyed him suspiciously. "If I didn't know you were completely in love with Wills, I'd be worried."

"That I am… doesn't mean I can't appreciate the fact that my best friend finally landed a great girl."

Zed couldn't hide the smile that spread across his face. "I swear I'm going to marry her someday…" He sighed and shook his head. "Just watch out for her for a minute."

"As long as you don't make Willa feel too bad."

He arched his brow. "She did this shit on purpose."

"She was watching out for you...in her own twisted way..."

"I know… I just..." he ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

"I get it…. Just remember she loves you while you're yelling at her."

Zed laughed and nodded. "Fair enough. I'll be right back."

Ten minutes later, he was kissing Addison's cheek as he placed her Diet Coke down in front of her. "Sorry about that, Beautiful." He sat down next to her, draping his arm around her. "Did I miss anything?"

"Not really," she smiled, leaning into his touch. "Just a few embarrassing stories of your youth and a really tone-deaf cover of a Christina Perry song."

"Ouch..."

"She's not wrong," Wynter laughed.

Zed smiled and shook his head. "She usually isn't, she's got a hell of an ear... but I was referring to..."

Wyatt shrugged as he pulled Willa down onto his lap. "Except for the occasional death glare, all was quiet on the ex-front."

"Babe, I told you. I'm fine," Addison reassured him. "I deserve a few glares and whispers. I slept with her boyfriend. Said boyfriend then left her for me…. If you did that to me, I'd probably cut a bitch."

Willa spit out the sip of water she had just taken. "Oh. My. God!" she said through a laugh as she tried to clean up the mess. "I did not expect that… sorry!"

Addison smiled and handed her a napkin.

Zed shook with silent laughter. "It's a good thing I'd never do anything like that to you," he whispered as his hand moved up the side of her leg.

"You better not…" she moved his hand away from the hem of her skirt. "Let's not add any more fuel to the fire. I feel bad for her. I can't imagine what losing you would feel like."

"Don't. And you'll never have to find out… I'm so in love with you, Addison."

"I love you, too..." she pushed him away with a smile.

"Seriously..." Wynter sighed dreamily as she threw her arms around them. "You two are so insanely adorable together." She smacked a kiss on Addison's cheek and looked around to Zed. "By the way, I ran into Mack backstage and told him that you were here. He put you on the lineup."

He stared at her dumbfounded. "Why?"

She rolled her eyes. "Because you haven't graced this stage since the night before you left and you're still kind of legendary around here."

"But I don't even have anything written or rehearsed. Hell, I don't even have my guitar."

Wynter rolled her eyes again. "You can borrow mine, duh! And as far as songs go, just play a fucking cover. You don't always have to be a musical genius."

He shook his head and smiled as he reached around Addison to ruffle Wynter's hair. "Oh fine, Wynnie… you win."

"Don't call me that!"

He threw her a wink and hugged Addison tight as the next person took the stage. Both of them ignoring another "accidental" bump into their chairs.

After a few more performances, Wynter nudged him. "Hey, you're coming up. Figure out what you're playing yet?"

He shook his head. "Nope. What do you want me to play?"

Her mouth dropped open. "You're going to let me pick?"

"Why not?" He answered with a shrug.

She smiled and rubbed her hands together. "How's your Gavin Rossdale these days?"

Zed laughed and hid his face in embarrassment. "Oh, no."

"Oh, yes!" Wynter said excitedly, practically bouncing in her chair.

Addison looked between the two of them. "I feel like I'm missing out on something here."

"Zed kind of made a name for himself around here by impersonating the always sexy Bush frontman," Wyatt said with a large smile. "Some people legit thought he was British… The ladies loved it!"

Addison threw her head back in a laugh. "Oh. My. God… I have got to see this!"

"You mean he hasn't broken out the accent in good ole Los Angeles?" Willa asked with a heavy cockney accent.

"That would be a negative!" she turned and looked up at Zed, poking her bottom lip out in a pout.

"Not the pout!" he laughed, leaning over to kiss her. "You know that thing is lethal..." he whispered in his best English accent.

Addison's eyes went wide. "I didn't think you could get any hotter..." she pulled back and fanned herself. "Yeah… you need to pull that out more often." She shook her head and took a sip of her Diet Coke.

Zed chuckled and looked over to Wynter. "I guess I'll be playing a Bush song then. Any particular one you had in mind?"

She nodded excitedly and handed him her guitar.

A few minutes later Zed was standing on stage. He locked eyes with Addison. "How's everyone doing tonight?" He asked using the accent again.

The crowd hooted and hollered their response. He threw a wink at Addison and started to strum. The crowd grew louder as they recognized the song.

"It Must be your skin that I'm sinking in

Must be for real 'cause now I can feel

And I didn't mind

It's not my kind

It's not my time to wonder why

Everything's gone white

And everything's grey

Now you're here now you're away

I don't want this

Remember that

I'll never forget where you're at

Don't let the days go by

Glycerin

Glycerin..." He continued to play as he locked eyes with Addison once again. He shook his head and smiled. "She's probably going to kick my ass for doing this, but… I need my girl up here to help me sing the rest."

Addison gave him a look of pure shock. "So much for not adding fuel to the fire," she muttered under her breath as Wyatt pulled her up closer to the stage and picked her up. She narrowed her eyes. "You're lucky I love you," she said as Zed motioned for her to take the next verse. He blew her a kiss and started to strum out the next chord progression.

"I'm never alone

I'm alone all the time

Are we at one

Or do you lie

We live in a wheel

Where everyone steals

But when we rise it's like strawberry fields

If I treated you bad

You bruise my face

I Couldn't love you more

You've got a beautiful taste..."

Zed walked up to her and sang along.

"Don't let the days go by

Could have been easier on you

I couldn't change though I wanted to

Should I have been easier by three

Our old friend fear and you and me

Glycerin

Glycerin

Don't let the days go by

Glycerin

Don't let the days go by

Glycerin, glycerin

Glycerin, glycerin..."

He leaned down and kissed her cheek. She smiled and turned towards him, mouthing the word 'trouble' as she smirked and shook her head. He bit back a laugh and started to sing again.

"Bad moon white again

Bad moon white again

And she falls around me..." he stopped playing and grabbed her hand, turning her towards him.

"And you fall around me..." he took off his borrowed guitar and passed it to her.

"And she falls

And she falls

And she falls… Ladies and Gentlemen, Miss Addison Donnely!" he called out as she rolled her eyes and tore into the guitar solo.

They subconsciously moved even closer together as they began to sing the last verse together.

"I needed you more

I wanted us less

I could not kiss just regress

It might just be

Clear simple and plain

That's just fine

That's just one of my names

Don't let the days go by

Could've been easier on you, you, you

Glycerine

Glycerine

Glycerine

Glycerine..." Their noses brushed together.

"Oh my glycerine..."

As Addison drug out the last power chord on the foot pedal, he closed the small distance between them and kissed her as the crowd erupted in applause.

"I love playing with you, Baby," he whispered in her ear as they stepped away from the microphone to acknowledge the crowd.

She giggled and leaned into him. "And I love you… You do realize you just made tonight a whole lot more difficult."

"Totally worth it," he smiled kissing her cheek.

When they got back to the table, Wyatt, Willa, and Wynter gave them another standing ovation.

Zed waved his hands. "Stop, I'm blushing," he teased as Wyatt gave him a high-five.

Willa shook her head. "You two… that was..."

"Intense!" Wynter interjected as Willa grasped for the right words.

"Yeah," she smiled. "What Wynnie said."

"Don't call me that!"

Zed smiled and hugged Addison closer to his side. "Now do you get it, Wills?"

Willa nodded her head. "Yeah, I think I do..." she said quietly, stealing a glance towards Wyatt.

Wynter grabbed Addison's hand and pulled her down to her chair. "Can you please teach me a little more on the guitar while you're in town?! I've never seen a girl shred like you can!"

Addison smiled. "Of course! I'd be happy to."

"Well..." Wyatt said as they all sat down. "As much as we, and pretty much everyone else, enjoyed that… I don't think someone else feels the same..." he casually leaned towards the table next to them, where Natalie was making out with someone none of them recognized.

Wynter rolled her eyes. "Halfway through that solo, she decided to play the jealousy card. She was eyeing you the entire time she was making out with him," she mock-whispered to Zed.

"Like that ever worked in the past," Willa said with a laugh. "Zedward doesn't do jealous."

Zed rolled his eyes. "I hate that nickname, Wills. So much."

"Wait..." Addison held her hand up and turned to Zed. "Since when don't you do jealous? Are you telling me this whole throwing punches at anyone who happens to glance in your girlfriend's direction is new?"

"What?" Wyatt laughed.

Addison spun back around. "Yeah, I've lost track of the number of fights he's gotten into."

"Fights are nothing new… Fights over a girl, however, are very new!" Wynter added. "Anytime they would argue, she'd flirt and make-out with some random guy. Z never even batted an eye."

Zed shrugged. "What can I say? I never cared before."

"Aww..." Addison blushed.

"You're not the only one that doesn't share well with others," he said as he pulled her into a kiss.

They all heard a frustrated scream and watched as Natalie stormed off, throwing her hip into the back of Addison's chair once again on her way by.

Zed let out a low growl.

"Easy, boy..." Addison whispered

"No, this is ridiculous!

"Z, it's fine. She's obviously still hurt."

"No, it isn't fine. Trust me, this is classic Natalie. I highly doubt she's been pining away for me since fucking October." He looked to his friends for backup.

Wyatt nodded. "Yeah, she was dating Mark on the football team by homecoming… Johnny on the basketball team by Winter Formal…."

"Then Brad on the baseball team by Spring Fling..." Willa added with a smirk.

"And Mark again for prom."

"See," Zed said. "She's just doing this..."

He was cut off by his name being called from the stage. They all glanced up to see Natalie standing on the stage. "This one's for you..." she said into the microphone as a backing track began to play.

Addison tried to hold back a laugh. "You know, Babe… I can overlook a lot, but a country fan? You really did have bad taste before me!"

Willa spit out her water again. "Damn, girl… I need to stop drinking around you," she laughed as Addison handed her another napkin.

Zed shook with silent laughter until the words his ex was singing finally sunk in.

"Right now, he's probably slow dancing

With a bleached-blond tramp

And she's probably getting frisky

Right now, he's probably buying

Her some fruity little drink

'Cause she can't shoot whiskey

Right now, he's probably up behind her

With a pool-stick

Showing her how to shoot a combo

And he don't know

I dug my key into the side

Of his pretty little souped-up-four-wheel drive

Carved my name into his leather seats

I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights

I slashed a hole in all four tires

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats..."

Zed rolled his eyes and hugged Addison closer to him.

"Um… Where's Taylor?" Wyatt asked suddenly.

Zed's head snapped over towards the table next to him. He quickly looked back to Wyatt. "You don't think..."

"… I put nothing past them…"

"Shit!" Zed pushed away from the table.

"I got it, man!" Wyatt said, already on his feet. "The last thing you need is another fight."

Zed nodded and reluctantly sat down.

"Right now, she's probably up singing some

White-trash version of Shania karaoke

Right now, she's probably saying "I'm drunk"

And he's a-thinking that he's gonna get lucky..."

Addison smiled up to him. "To be fair, you probably are…"

He cracked a smile and pulled her back into a hug, kissing the top of her head. "I love you. I'm sorry you have to deal with this."

"I love you, too… And I told you, I'm fine. It's just one night."

"I might have saved a little trouble for the next girl..."

Zed and Addison both cringed and looked at each other. "Pitchy?" he laughed.

"Just a bit..." she giggled.

"'Cause the next time that he cheats

Oh, you know it won't be on me!

No, not on me..."

The venom in her voice was enough to catch their attention. They both looked up to find Natalie staring daggers at Addison.

"That's it..." Zed snapped, looking at Addison. "It's one thing to be pissed off at me, it's another thing for her to target you. Between the chair shoves and now this? This ends now. I don't want this to happen every time we try to go out while we're in town…Wynnie?"

She flipped him off. "Yes, Zedward?"

"Can I borrow your guitar?"

"Again?"

Zed stood up and grabbed the guitar from Wynter. "Yeah." He leaned down and kissed Addison. "I love you, Baby."

"I know. I love you too."

"You own me."

She smiled and bit his lip. "I know that, too."

"Good," he laughed, nipping her nose, just as Wyatt came back to the table.

"Car is fine… empty threat for once. Taylor was in the men's room."

Zed sighed in relief. "Thank fuck."

Wyatt gave him an odd look, eyeing up the guitar in his hand. "You going back on stage?"

"Yeah..." he stole a quick glance towards Addison.

"I've got things covered here."

He let out another relieved sigh and pulled Wyatt into a hug. "Thanks, man."

Wyatt hugged him back. "It's all good. Go reclaim the narrative."

Zed chuckled and nodded his head. "You know me too well."

"That I do," Wyatt said with a laugh.

A few minutes later Zed was walking back out onto the stage."Hi, me again..." he joked as he re-adjusted the microphone. "I wanted to tell you a little story..." he started to lightly strum out a melody. "About a guy who moved out to LA with nothing but music on his mind, until one day..." he looked down and smiled at Addison. "He met a beautiful, bad-ass, rocker girl, who flipped his life upside down with nothing more than a smile and a simple handshake…"

Addison blew him a kiss as he started to sing.

"I'm such a bore, I'm such a bummer

There must be more behind the summer

I want someone to make some trouble

Been way too safe inside my bubble, oh

Take me out and keep me up all night

Let me live on the wilder side of life

Carry me away

Carry me away

Carry me away..."

"He's got it bad," Wynter said, nudging Addison's arm.

"So do I," she answered, not taking her eyes off of Zed as he serenaded her. They might be having to pay for their past transgressions tonight, but they were worth it. They belonged together. Anyone could see it.

"Carry me away

Carry me away

Carry me away…" he walked to the edge of the stage and held his hand out.

"Again?!" she asked in disbelief.

Zed nodded his head. "I'm not going to make you sing again..."

She rolled her eyes playfully as Wyatt picked her up again to boost her up onto the stage. Zed twirled her under his arm before starting to strum again. He looked into her eyes and sang from his heart.

"You carnivore, you loose cannon

Can I have some more? I can't understand it

You fast car, you foolish spender

You know you are, and I surrender..."

She couldn't help but laugh.

"So come on over and wake me up

Put some of your tequila in my coffee cup

You know I need you, and that's for sure

You're just the kinda crazy I've been lookin' for

Carry me away

Carry me away

Carry me away

Where the sun hits my face all different

Carry me away

Carry me away

Carry me away…." he moved the guitar behind him and pulled her to him. "I wouldn't change our story for anything. It's wild and crazy, and out of control, just like us... I love you," he said close enough for the microphone to pick up.

"I love you too, Z," she whispered breathlessly, lost in his eyes.

"WOOOOOOOOOH!"

They both laughed and looked to see Wyatt, Wynter, and even Willa, standing on the table cheering them on.

Zed grabbed her hand and ran off stage, kissing her as soon as they were hidden from public view. "I'm serious, Adds," he whispered against her lips. "I love our story. Shady start and all."

"What good love story doesn't start rough?" She smiled as his hands went into her hair, deepening their kiss.

The sound of someone clearing their throat from behind them pulled them apart. "Zed..."

He smiled and pulled further away from Addison. "Adds, this is Mack. He's the stage manager here, and he also manages the music store I used to work at. Mack, this is my girlfriend, Addison."

"So I've heard," the older man said, holding out his hand to shake hers. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Addison."

"Likewise, Mack," she said with a smile.

"I have to say, Zed. Whatever they're teaching you out at that fancy arts school is definitely paying off… Any chance I can lure you back?"

Zed laughed. "Mack, you know I loved working for you but,"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, Julliard… I know!" Mack teased. He looked over to Addison, "Keep an eye out for this one, he's got quite the fan base up here."

"So I've seen," Addison replied with a quiet giggle.

Mack pulled out his phone. "Mind if I snap a picture for the wall?"

Zed's mouth dropped open. "You're putting me on the wall?"

"I'm putting both of you on the wall," he answered with a chuckle. "If that's okay."

Zed nodded furiously.

"What's with the wall?"

Mack smiled. "It's lined with pictures of all the big names that have come through these doors… I want to get a picture of you two so I can say you played here BEFORE you became famous." He shook his head, smiling larger. "I saw that performance earlier tonight. You kids have what it takes… I fully expect to see you headline upstairs one day."

Addison nodded, blushing slightly.

Zed wrapped his arm around her as they smiled for the camera.

"And got it!" Mack said, looking at the photo captured on his phone. He turned it around to show them.

"Z, you're weren't looking at the camera!"

"Why would I look anywhere else, when I can look at you?"

"Damn, that was smooth," Mack laughed.

Addison blushed again.

"Enjoy your evening, kids."

"We will," Zed said, shaking Mack's hand.

As they made their way back towards the table, Zed spotted Jay standing near the bar. "You ready to help me sing Wynnie's praises?" he asked, kissing the top of her head.

"Actually, I think I'm going to head to the ladies room."

He pulled back and looked at her. "You okay?"

"Of course," she said, brushing off his concern. "I just need to pee."

He shrugged his shoulders and pulled her in for a kiss. "Fair enough...I guess I'll meet you back at the table then..." he kissed her again and ran his hand down the side of her face. "See you in a few, Gorgeous."

She nodded and squeezed his hand, not trusting her voice at the moment. She made her way through the crowded room almost in a daze. When she was finally safely inside she let out a shaky breath and leaned her head against the wall. Even though they'd been together for eight months, she was still occasionally caught off guard by the depths of her feelings for him. The words "I love you" didn't come easy for her, but with Zed, they weren't nearly enough. She closed her eyes and exhaled again, trying to get a hold on her emotions.

"You bitch!"

Addison's shirt was suddenly very wet and very cold. She opened her eyes to see Natalie standing in front of her. She silently cursed as she brushed the ice cubes and excess soda off of her white silk blouse. "Natalie, I know you're upset..."

"You don't get to talk to me, you homewrecking skank! Do you have any idea who I am? Who my father is?"

Something inside of her snapped. She pushed off the wall and took a step forward, "Well..." she said in a dangerously calm voice as she grabbed a paper towel to blot at her shirt. "I had thought you were a girl who was heartbroken because her boyfriend broke up with her over the phone at one in the morning immediately after professing his love for me after he finished screwing me against the door to my house… and I actually did feel bad about that…" she shrugged her shoulders. "Well, that and the nightly phone calls that lasted for hours, and the lingering touches every time we were together, oh… and the multiple times we kissed... yeah… I felt pretty bad about all of it… until now." She looked over to her and smiled. "Now, after hearing about the little head games you used to play, and hearing from his friends and family about how much happier he is now… I don't think you ever really loved him."

"Of course I loved him!"

"Did you?" she inched closer to her. "Because if you really loved him the way he deserves to be loved, you would never have treated him that way. He is the most amazing person I have ever known, he's loving, and caring, and he deserves the world! I think you just loved the idea of having a really sexy, bad boy on your arm… I bet it drove your parents crazy."

"How dare you..." Natalie raised her hand, but before she could strike, Addison grabbed her wrist.

"I know I'm right. I know your type. You think everyone should give in to what you want because you were fortunate enough to be born into an affluent family. But guess what, it doesn't make you special. You may have it easy right now, but someday you're going to wake up and realize that all you are is a terrible person who no one really likes for any reason other than your name and money." She let go and turned her back to her, continuing to blot at her shirt.

"You fucking..."

"Natalie! Enough!"

Addison turned back around to see Willa standing behind them.

"You lay one finger on her and I will put you in a trunk on one of your Daddy's car lots and help people look for you. I am not playing."

"Why do you care? You don't even like her!" Natalie snapped.

Willa stood up a little taller and crossed her arms. "That's where you're wrong. Unlike you, she's one of us."

Natalie rolled her eyes. "You and your stupid 'pack' or whatever the hell you call yourselves..."

"Yeah, my family. The one you would have never belonged to."

Natalie huffed and turned her attention back towards Addison. "Don't think he isn't going to do the same thing to you one day." She pushed past them and stormed out.

An awkward silence filled the bathroom.

"So…" Addison finally said as she blotted at her shirt again. "Just how long were you in here for?"

Will smiled and hopped up to sit on the counter. "Long enough to know that I owe you an apology."

Addison gave her an odd look. "For what?"

"For telling Nat that you'd be here tonight… I knew she'd get all territorial and try to make the night hell for the two of you… What I didn't know was that she'd go so far as to throw a drink."

Addison rolled her eyes. "Look, I get it. You've been friends with Zed for a long time… And… I'm the new girl that he chose over everyone back home…"

Willa shrugged her shoulders. "Basically."

"But I do love him."

"So do we…" she sighed. "Zed is family, and family is the most important thing to me...Which is why I wanted to make sure you were good enough for him. Lord knows that boy has a spotty track record of picking them."

Addison smiled and shook her head as she grabbed a few paper towels. "While I appreciate you looking out for your friend, I don't feel the need for your approval."

"I know… which is one of the things I like about you. Natalie is an over-privileged, two-faced, bitch who was always cashing in on her family's influence… And I was worried you were the same. But, I was wrong. You are nothing like her. And I mean that as a compliment. I'm sorry I rushed to judge you before I got a chance to know you..." It was quiet for another moment before she added. "I meant it though… You're one of us now."

"Thanks, I guess?"

Willa laughed and hopped down. "And Natalie was wrong. Zed really and truly loves you. He would never do anything to hurt you."

Addison smiled, "Thank you."

"You're welcome. I've known Zedward for a loooong time, and I have never seen him like he is with you..." she smiled and shrugged. "And you look at him the same way I look at Wyatt."

"I'm pretty crazy about him."

Willa shook her head and laughed. "And can I just say, hearing you put Natalie in her place was the best thing ever! Fresh start?"

"I'd like that."

"So would I."

Addison held up a finger. "I have to ask you one thing though... What is with the Zedward thing?"

Willa laughed again. "Have you seen Twilight?"

"Who hasn't?"

"Fair point… So you know how Rpatz always has his hair standing like straight up?"

Addison threw her head back and laughed. "Oh. My. God!"

"The boy does love his hair product… and you throw in that accent he can do?"

"Oh, I am so going to cover him in glitter someday," Addison giggled.

"You have to send me a pic!"

Addison nodded her head and smiled. She looked down and tried to blot her shirt again, letting out a frustrated sigh. "Mind if I get to the sink?"

"Not at all," Willa answered moving.

Addison unbuttoned her blouse and shrugged out of it. As she stood at the sink, attempting to rinse the dark stain off, she heard Willa gasp. "What?" she asked, looking at her through the reflection in the mirror.

"Um… I don't mean to um… presume anything… but…." she shrugged. "I couldn't help but notice..." she walked closer to Addison and softly ran her finger down her bicep. "Ligature bruises?"

Addison's eyes went wide. "How did you..."

"Use jute or another natural fiber rope next time. Nylon cuts into the skin more and can be unnecessarily painful."

Addison's mouth dropped open.

"What?"

She turned the water off and spun around. "Care to share?"

Willa bit back a laugh. "Wyatt and I dabble in some rope play from time to time."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. I had no idea Zed would ever..."

Addison smiled. "We just started. Actually, we had plans to go to this club tonight… crap, I can't remember the name..."

"Shut up!" Willa exclaimed. "You guys were going to Gym?"

"Yeah! That's it! You know of it?"

"Of course! It's the best fet-club in the area! But you have to be at least 21."

Addison shrugged her shoulders. "We have fake ID's… which reminds me..." she dug in her pocket and pulled out the gold wristbands from earlier. "We're on the VIP list upstairs."

"What the hell, Pom-poms?!" Willa laughed. "Why have we been wasting our time down here?"

Addison rolled her eyes and motioned towards Willa.

"Oh, right… me and my stupid schemes… Sorry again."

"It's fine," Addison smiled. She looked back down at her shirt. "The only thing that's going to save this thingis a trip to the dry-cleaners. Silk and soda don't mix."

Willa smiled and shrugged out of her jacket. "But lace and leather do… Here…" she said, offering it to her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah… I'm sure. That bra is gorgeous! Victoria's?"

Addison took the leather moto jacket from her and slipped it on, turning back towards the mirror. "La Perla."

Willa's jaw dropped. "Are you serious? Their bras are like $300 to $400! Hell, their underwear are like $200!"

Addison nodded. "A fact that I remind my boyfriend of on a regular basis when he rips them to shreds."

"Savage," Willa laughed, taking a step closer to her. "Who knew Zed had it in him."

"You have no idea," Addison answered, smiling. "He's the only person I have ever met that can keep up with me. We've been incredibly reserved tonight because I actually felt bad for Natalie," she rolled her eyes. "Well, I'm over hiding how we really are together. If she doesn't like it, she can kiss my perfectly toned ass."

Willa shook her head, "I never thought I'd like someone Zed dated… but, here you are basically the best person I have ever met… I swear if you tell me you're a horror fan..."

Addison laughed. "One of the first things Z and I bonded over."

"American Werewolf in London?"

"Classic… but my favorite is The Omen 2."

"Damn, you were so close to being perfect…" she laughed. With a wicked gleam in her eye, she took a step closer to Addison. "What do you say we go put Natalie in her place once and for all?"

Addison pretended to ponder. "You know, I'd like to say that I'm good letting it go, but… I am kind of all pent up from wanting to knock her out," she smiled wide and nodded. "I'm in, what did you have in mind?"

The door of the bathroom swung open. "YOU GUYS ARE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE THIS!" Wynter exclaimed running over to them. She stopped short when she noticed Addison's lack of shirt. "What happened?"

Addison shrugged nonchalantly. "Natalie and a Dr. Pepper."

"That no good, two-faced, ugly..."

"Woah!" Willa laughed.

"Too much?"

Willa pinched her fingers together. "Just a little."

"Oops...Anyway, what I was trying to find you guys to tell you is..." She jumped up and down excitedly. "Zed just introduced me to the most amazing guy! Seriously, I have never met someone so perfect! You have to come meet him!"

"Um, what happened to Taylor? You've been pining over him for months!"

Wynter sighed and shrugged her shoulders. "I'm tired of chasing after him. And Jay is…." she smiled and blushed.

"Well, I say go for it! You deserve someone who can't take their eyes off of you! Think he'd want to go upstairs?" Addison asked pulling out the wrist bands again.

"How did you…" she shook her head. "YES!"

Addison handed her two of them.

"This is going to be the best night ever! Let's go!"

Willa pulled her back as she started for the door. "We're not going up just yet."

"I know that look," her voice dropped to a whisper. "Whatever you are plotting, I want in!"

Willa drapped her arms around both of them. "Let's go show Natalie what we should have shown her a long time ago"

"What's that?"

Willa smiled. "That she doesn't mess with the pack."

A few minutes later Wynter slid back into her chair at the table. "Sorry to keep you waiting!" she smiled sweetly up at Jay.

Zed groaned in frustration. "Did you find the girls?" he asked anxiously.

She nodded her head and smiled. "Yeah, you'll see them in just a sec..."

Zed narrowed his eyes. "What are you hiding?"

"Na na na

Come on

Na na na

Come on

Come on

Come on Come on..."

Zed and Wyatt's heads snapped towards the stage at the sound of Addison and Willa's voices.

"Na na na na..."

"Well..." Wyatt said as he took in the sight of Willa singing as she and Addison danced together. "I guess that answers your question, Z."

"I didn't want to ruin the surprise," Wynter laughed, taking in their shocked expressions.

"Feels so good being bad

There's no way I'm turning back

Now the pain is my pleasure

Cause nothing could measure..."

"Um, Wynter..." Zed asked, swallowing thickly, unable to tear his eyes away from the stage. "Why is my girlfriend not wearing a shirt?" He smiled and ran his tongue along his bottom lip. "Not that I'm complaining."

"Love is great, love is fine

Out the box, out of line

The affliction of the feeling

Leaves me wanting more..."

"Natalie threw a drink on her."

"WHAT?!" He reluctantly tore his eyes away from the stage, searching the crowd for his ex.

"Easy, Z… Your girl handled Natalie just fine all on her own."

"Shit… were the cops called?"

Wynter laughed. "No punches were thrown… not that any of us would have minded."

He let out a sigh of relief and looked back towards the stage.

"Cause I may be bad

But I'm perfectly good at it

Sex in the air

I don't care

I love the smell of it

Sticks and stones

May break my bones

But chains and whips

Excite me..."

Wyatt subtly adjusted himself under the table as he tried to casually take a sip of his drink. "Nice..." his voice cracked. He cleared his throat and tried again. "Nice song choice."

Zed was about to tease him when Addison started to sing.

"Just one night full of sin

Feel the pain on your skin

Tough, I don't scream mercy

It's your turn to hurt me..." She licked her lower lip and motioned for him to join her on stage.

"Well, I, um… It's only fair..." he stammered as he stumbled to get up to her. The second he was on the stage she grabbed his shirt and pulled him towards her.

"If I'm bad tie me down

Shut me up, gag and bound me..." she winked and wrapped a leg around him.

"Cos the pain is my pleasure

Nothing comes better

Yeah…."

He couldn't take it anymore. He grabbed her ass and lifted her up, kissing her hard.

"Cause I may be bad

But I'm perfectly good at it

Sex in the air

I don't care

I love the smell of it

Sticks and stones

May break my bones

But chains and whips

Excite m..." Willa was cut off by Wyatt's lips against hers. She giggled and dropped the microphone as her arms wrapped around him.

Wynter laughed and looked over to Jay as she stood up. "I love my crazy pack!… Meet me by the elevators!..." She jumped onto the stage and grabbed the microphone to finish the song.

After a rather raucous round of applause, the five of them walked arm and arm, laughing towards the elevators.

"Wynter!"

They all stopped walking and turned around to find Taylor running towards them with Natalie a short distance behind him.

"Wynter, wait!" He said, coming to a stop in front of them.

"Taylor," Wynter responded quietly. "What do you want?"

"A second chance?" he panted, catching his breath. "I'm thinking you, me, and that new action movie that came out yesterday. What do you say?"

"What do I say?" She cocked her head to the side and arched her brow as Jay walked over to join them. "I say you can take your second chance and shove it up your ass."

"Ooooooooh….." They all laughed as Taylor straightened himself out.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. I've been trying to get back together with you for months since you broke up with me for no reason other than your sister told you to! And now, all of a sudden, you want to give things another try? I don't think so. As far as I'm concerned you and your evil hag of a twin can rot in hell together." She grabbed Jay's hand and smiled up to him, turning around and walking towards the elevator.

"And just where do you think you're going?" Natalie snapped. "You're making a big mistake, Wynter. Almost as big of a mistake as Zed made. But, if you're both happy scrapping the bottom of the social barrel..."

Wynter spun around and started towards her, only to be stopped by Addison.

Addison took a step forward and rounded her shoulders. "Actually, Natalie, we're going upstairs, would you care to join us?"

Natalie rolled her eyes. "It's 21 and over you idiot."

"Oh… so you don't have one of these?" she pushed up the sleeve of her borrowed jacket and held up her wrist, smiling sweetly as she showed off the gold wristband. "VIP." She took a few steps closer to her."Do you have any idea who I am? Who my father is?" she whispered, using Natalie's own words against her.

Zed bit back a laugh and grabbed her hand. "Baby, she is not worth it."

"Trust me, I know..." she smiled.

"You bitch..."

A low growl tore from Zed's chest as he stepped in front of Addison protectively. "You don't get to talk to her again." He turned to Taylor. "Keep your sister in line or I'm not going to hold my girlfriend back."

"Just wait until I tell my father!" Natalie sneered.

Willa rolled her eyes. "For reals? You're playing the 'daddy' card? What exactly is he going to do? He owns a local car dealership."

She stomped her foot angrily and grabbed her brother's hand before storming off towards the exit as the all watched them.

"Are things always this exciting?" Jay asked in a mock whisper.

Wynter laughed and hugged him. "Thankfully not..." she looked around him towards Zed and Addison. "It must be these two!"

Zed rolled his eyes. "It was a long time coming. I'm proud of you Wynnie."

"Don't call me that!"

Before Zed could even laugh, Wynter charged and tackled him to the ground. She jumped up and smiled.

"Owww..."

Everyone was doubled over in laughter as Addison helped him to his feet.

"Baby, you totally just got taken out by a girl," she giggled, pulling him into a kiss.

Zed shook his head and rubbed his side. "Jay..."

"Yeah, man?"

"Did I mention she's the only girl on the Varsity Football team?"

Jay looked at Wynter and smiled. "You are amazing."

"Thank you," she whispered with a soft blush spreading across her cheeks.

"Okay, if we're done tackling Zedward, and telling off exes, I say we head upstairs!" Willa said, motioning towards the elevator lift.

Addison nodded her head. "I need tequila."

"I need you," Zed chuckled, picking her up and carrying her towards the lift.

She wrapped her legs around his waist. "You've got me."

"Damn right I do," he said with a large smile across his face as he leaned in to kiss her.

An hour later the six of them were several rounds into their night in the VIP section when Jay pulled Wynter away.

"They seem to be hitting it off quite nicely," Addison smiled as she rested her head on Zed's shoulder.

"How have we never met him before?" Wyatt asked, grabbing for the bottle of Grey Goose in the center of the table. "Damn, it's empty..." he sighed as he stood up and stretched. "You want another Z?"

Zed looked into his nearly empty glass. "Sure, why not." He kissed the top of Addison's head. "You two need another?"

She shook her head. "No, we're good."

He lifted her chin up and kissed her softly, "I'll be right back."

As soon as they were alone, Willa picked up the bottle of Patron that she and Addison were drinking and poured another round for them both. "So… something I've been wondering since our bathroom chat..."

Addison smiled and took a sip. "Yes?"

"I'm assuming from the bruises, Zed is the rigger?"

She shook her head. "No, it's a pretty even split. He's tied me a few times, I've tied him..." she let out a slow breath. "God is he hot in a reverse prayer tie..."

"Really?"

She nodded and took another sip. "The way his chest looks with his arms behi..."

Willa cut her off. "Let me clarify. I meant, do you really trade-off?"

Addison smiled and giggled. "Oops. And, yes. Is Wyatt always in charge?"

Willa threw her head back laughing. "Nooooo. I am the alpha in the relationship. Especially when we play."

"Really?" Addison asked sitting up a little straighter and turning towards her. "So Wyatt is 100% submissive?"

"I mean, he takes control… when I let him," she said, clinking glasses with Addison.

"While we're...expanding our conversation on such topics..." Addison stopped, trying to choose her words carefully.

"Just spit it out, I am far too close to drunk for a complex question."

"Fair enough," Addison laughed. "Okay… bluntly… have our boyfriends ever hooked up?"

Willa nearly spit her drink out. "Damn, Pom-poms..." she laughed. "I was not expecting that one." She shook her head and took another sip. "As far as I know, they are both straight as an arrow."

"Bullshit," Addison laughed, pointing across the room towards the bar where the boys were standing. They were both laughing and holding onto one another.

Willa tilted her head to the side. "Huh… I never really thought about it before..." She looked back at Addison. "What about you?"

"I didn't think about it until earlier tonight when Zed mentioned being attracted to 'competitive ones' when Wyatt and I were betting on whether or not I could get us up here."

Willa held up a finger. "Okay, first off I was asking if you'd ever thought about you being bi, but now I'm all kinds of interested in this new development."

Addison laughed. "I prefer not to limit myself to one gender. I happen to be madly in love with a guy… That doesn't mean I haven't been attracted to or had some fun with members of my own sex."

"I swear, Zed won the fucking lottery with you," Willa laughed, toasting her again.

"What about you?"

"Well, Wyatt and I have been together since like the sixth grade. But… I've always been attracted to women as well."

"What's not to like?" Addison asked with a shrug.

"Exactly!" she shook her head and smiled. "So, what exactly happened with this conversation earlier?"

Addison took another sip of her drink. "Like I said, Z mentioned being attracted to competitive people, but then he turned super pale and started stammering about it not being a physical attraction, which I didn't believe for a second, but then Wyatt teased him and shot back with a 'so you don't think we're hot?' and..." she shook her head and giggled. "My poor boyfriend looked like he was about to die right there on the sidewalk."

"I don't know how I didn't see it before..." Willa whispered almost to herself.

"Wanna figure it out?"

Willa smiled and finished off her drink. "What did you have in mind?"

Addison scooched in closer and started to whisper out her plan.

A few minutes later Zed and Wyatt were back with a new bottle of vodka.

"Sorry that took so long," Wyatt said, kissing Willa's cheek.

"Long line?"

"Not really," Zed answered with a shrug. "We just got to talking and lost track of time… sorry, Baby."

Addison playfully rolled her eyes. "You forgot about me?"

"Never," he smiled leaning down to nip her nose.

"Actually," Willa said, standing up. "Addison and I were just about to go for a walk… get some fresh air… now that you boys are back, you can come with."

"I'll follow you anywhere," Wyatt said, pulling her in for a kiss.

Zed pulled Addison up to her feet. "I know just the spot."

The four of them walked through the crowded room, and through a door clearly labeled "EMPLOYEES ONLY".

"Um, Zedward..." Willa said as they walked down a dark narrow hallway. "I have a feeling we're not supposed to be in here."

"Ease up, Wills… Carpe Noctum."

"Quoi?"

Addison giggled and turned back to her. "Seize the night!"

"I don't need to 'seize the night'… I own the night," Willa laughed just as Zed opened up another door.

"You girls said you wanted to go for a walk," He said motioning for them to enter. "How about a walk in the park?"

Willa giggled and pulled Wyatt along as they went to explore the new room.

"What is this place?" Addison asked in wonder as she gazed around at the hundreds of lights surrounding them.

"It's a light garden," he whispered, wrapping his arms around her from behind.

"It's beautiful."

"You're beautiful..." His hand traced the curve of her hip as he spun her around. "I know it's not Paris, but I'm so fucking happy we came to Seattle."

She smiled and wrapped her arms around him. "As much as I was looking forward to getting lost and making out with you in the catacombs, I'm glad we came too. I think we needed the closure more than we realized. And it's been nice to get a peek into your life from before you moved…" she took a deep breath and sighed. "Do you miss it?"

"Miss what?"

"Being here. Your 'pack'..." she said with a sad smile.

"Sure I miss them, but..." he shrugged his shoulders and pulled her flush against him. "Moving to California was the best damn decision I have ever made. I finished my first year at Seabrook High with a 4.0 and a five-star rating, I have a job that pays double what I was making at the music store… There's sunshine and minimal rain… I have amazing friends… I'm sure there's something else too..." he snapped his fingers a few times and shook his head in thought. "Can't place it..."

Addison giggled and rested her head on his shoulders.

"Oh, yeah… that's it..." he leaned down and kissed her softly. "You are the most important thing in my life. If I hadn't moved, I would have never found you. I'm so in love with you Addison."

"I love you too."

"Forever," he whispered, guiding her face towards his.

"And after," she breathed as their lips brushed against one another's.

The sound of Wyatt's laughter pulled his attention away from her lips.

Addison smiled. "Baby?"

"Yes?"

"When are you going to admit to yourself that you have a thing for Wyatt?"

He pulled back a little with a shocked expression on his face. "What?"

"It's totally fine. But you need to be honest with yourself."

"I'm not gay."

"I didn't say you were."

"I'm in love with you."

"And I love you too, but that's not what we're discussing." She ran a hand down his face and pulled him in for another kiss. "Your eyes have followed him all night… I don't blame you, he is pretty hot."

"Addie!"

"What? I may be crazy head over heels in love with you, but I'm not blind."

"He's my best friend."

"And Bree is mine, doesn't mean we haven't had some fun."

"But you're Bi."

"And if we're going by the looks of things, so are you."

"I am not."

She pulled away and arched her brow. "Promise me something."

"Anything."

"That you won't freak out..."

"Addison..." he said in a low wary voice.

She threw him a wink and turned around. "Hey, Wyatt?"

"What's up, Pom-poms?" He called out from somewhere deep in the maze of lights.

"Can you and Willa come here?"

"Addie! What are you doing?" Zed asked in a hushed whisper.

"Relax, baby..." she said, brushing off his concern with an eye roll just as Wyatt and Willa appeared next to them.

"You called?" Wyatt said with a laugh.

Addison and Willa exchanged a quick look.

"You remember our little wager outside?"

Wyatt rolled his head back, feigning annoyance. "Yeah… can't believe I freakin' lost a bet."

Addison and Willa both giggled.

"Well, I thought of something you can do for me."

"And what would that be?"

"Kiss me."

Wyatt and Zed's heads both snapped towards her. "WHAT?!"

"A bet is a bet," Willa said with a shrug, making them both look at her as well.

Wyatt looked at Zed.

He held his hands up and shrugged.

"OoooK…," he whispered taking a step closer to her.

Addison stood up a little straighter and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down to her level as their lips met.

Zed took in a sharp breath as he watched the kiss deepen. She grabbed for his hand and pulled him towards her, kissing him as well. Ever so slowly she backed away guiding their faces towards each other until they were locked in a fiery kiss.

"That is so damn hot," Willa whispered as she and Addison stood back and watched.

"Yes, it is…."

Willa turned to her and leaned in, "Welcome to the pack, Pom-poms," she whispered as she closed the distance and kissed her.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Oh I miss the days when I could sit down and write in peace and quiet. Hopefully the extra long chapter makes up for the fact that I haven't updated in a few weeks! Hope everyone is staying sane and safe! **

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**Stupid Little Love Song, Fefe Dobson**

**Glycerine (Live), Bush ft. Gwen Stefani**

**Before He Cheats, Carrie Underwood**

**Carry Me Away, John Mayer**

**S&M (remix), Rihanna ft. Britney Spears**


	33. Secret

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: This chapter is rated M. Like really M… and that's saying something considering the M content in previous chapters. If you need to skip through, just pick it up after the page break.**

* * *

**On The Edge**

**Chapter 33**

**SECRET**

"I thought I'd find you two up here."

"Oh my fucking God!" Addison disengaged and grabbed her chest. Breaths rushing on a collision course with hyperventilation.

Zed turned around slowly, almost unable to believe the voice that had materialized from behind them. He blinked twice before his face broke out into a large smile.

Addison smoothed her skirt down to cover the mess that they'd made and spun around. "Wyatt!"

"Hey there Pom-poms… The last time I saw you, that sell-out with the big rack had her tongue down your throat."

She rolled her eyes. "We don't discuss the Katie Perry incident… can't believe I lost a fucking bet to you at my own fucking party!"

Wyatt let out a laugh as he leaned against the heavy steel door and studied them. "I swear you two haven't changed a bit."

Zed shook his head, still in disbelief. "...Holy shit… I can't… what are you..."

"Easy there, Z… clearly the blood hasn't returned to your brain yet," he said as his eyes ran the length of Zed's body. "We signed with a new manager over the holidays and he invited us tonight to see the bands he currently has on tour."

Addison took a step closer to him. "Wait… you mean..."

He nodded his head. "Looks like we're all represented by Bucky Buchanan."

"So the rest of the pack is here?" Zed asked excitedly.

"They sure are. Wills is downstairs hitting on your drummer," he said pointing to Zed. "And Wynnie is with Bucky down the street at some diner hashing out all the gory details of our contract… I got sent to find you two and figure out why when we were told who we would possibly be touring with, Zed Jacobs and Addison Donnelly were never mentioned." He shrugged and smiled. "Zed Necrodopolus was mentioned… as was a Casey Jacobs?"

"That would be me," Addison giggled.

"Loving the white hair, by the way," Wyatt laughed, pointing to the bleached out streak in his own.

"I can't believe Bucky kept a secret like this… he didn't tell us he was signing a new band."

"Seems like he's not the only one keeping secrets," Wyatt shrugged. "So… wanna fill me in?"

Zed smiled. "It's a long-ass story, man… why don't you grab Willa and head to the bar next door? We'll finish up and meet you there in a few… Oh, and you didn't see us together… if anyone knew..."

Wyatt looked between the two of them for a moment before a slow smile crossed his face. He took a few steps closer to them. "Or I can join in…"

"You wouldn't do anything without Willa," Addison breathed, reaching for any excuse to deny exactly what Wyatt was offering. It was so wrong, yet she was so worked up, she couldn't help but want it.

"Willa won't mind… especially if it's the two of you… you're part of the pack."

Mixed signals fired in her brain. She just got Zed back. Why the hell was she even remotely considering anything that could put a strain on their relationship? She rolled her eyes at her own internal musings. _Because I'm a masochist with an insatiable appetite for sex and trouble… Not necessarily in that order._

She glanced towards Zed for some input, but he was useless at the moment, standing next to her with his mouth hanging open.

Her mind raced. The two of them. Together. Again. After all of these years. She swept her eyes down Wyatt's front, knowing just what secrets he held, and anxious to discover the new ones. Sculpted six-pack, tattoos, and piercings. The thought of regret left her brain as she grabbed Zed's hand.

"You got protection?"

Zed snapped his neck her way. She expected a confrontation with disappointment, but he was smiling ear to ear. He wanted this just as much as she did, perhaps more.

Wyatt held up a wrapped condom from his pocket and smirked. "Never leave home without it." He unzipped his black jeans and freed himself into the cold night.

"Jesus… how drunk did you have to be to have that tattooed?" Zed asked in disbelief as he watched the condom roll down to cover a tribal design.

"Very," Wyatt laughed.

"We'll have to marvel at that later. Right now, I have a date with double penetration."

"Still so bossy," Wyatt snickered as he stepped into her personal space.

"You know you like it, just like Zed does."

She could feel Zed smile as he stepped behind her and bit her shoulder in response. He wrapped his arms protectively around her waist. "I love you so fucking much," he whispered as he dove back into her ass without warning.

The standing angle was a new one, making her lose her breath for a few strokes as Wyatt watched Zed fuck her. The blend of pleasure and pain was exquisite. In and out he pumped while she fingered herself. She held up her hand for Wyatt to taste. He sucked her flavor off.

The next thing she knew, her shirt was up, and he was pulling on her nipple piercing.

"God, yes!" she clutched his face harder against her nipple as Zed bit her neck. "Put your dick in my pussy and stare at Zed while you fuck me."

Zed's breath caught and Wyatt smiled like he found heaven as she grabbed his cock and slid him in.

"My wild girl..." Zed groaned as he stopped his thrusts to allow her to adjust to the intrusion.

She stood on her tiptoes to give them both the angle they needed, but she wobbled. Wyatt came to the rescue and lifted her off the ground. She wrapped her legs around and started to ride him like a kid in a bouncy chair with Zed's dick slamming her ass in sync. She moaned at the feel of both men ramming against each other from inside. She could tell they were enjoying this just as much as she was.

Wyatt's gaze shifted from her to Zed.

"Kiss him..." she breathed, barely able to control her voice from screaming out.

Wyatt's grin widened as he tore into Zed, who paused his thrusts for a moment. Their eyes closed and their tongues mingled.

Addison was grateful for the momentary break in action. If they hadn't stopped, she'd have hosed Wyatt down like a mud wrestler after a match.

After their erotic display of affection, their lips separated. Addison licked both sets of lips and their kisses became a communal one. Three tongues, three passions feeding one body… hers. Wyatt rubbed her clit as she squeezed her ass around Zed again. He moaned into their tangle of mouths. She stroked Zed's cheek beside her head. "That was so fucking hot."

Crushed between them, she bucked her hips and restarted the engines. "Now, who wants to come first?"

"After you, Baby," Zed breathed.

"What a gentleman," Wyatt smiled against Addison's cheek. "But, I'm ready to blow." He hefted her up and readjusted his hold as she leaned against his chest to give Zed a better angle to pound.

"Well, then, I guess Wyatt gets to come on my face while Zed watches."

Wyatt lowered her feet to the ground and pulled out. He whipped off the condom and tossed it aside. Zed kept the back door rocking as she bent over and took Wyatt's cock in her mouth. Zed slowed his pace for several beats, then pulled out. Addison smiled around Wyatt's dick, making Zed almost lose it.

She dropped down to her knees at Wyatt's feet.

He stroked her hair as she sucked him hard into her throat. He smoothed it and cupped her chin, staring into his eyes. "You ready?" She swirled her tongue around his shaft once more and smiled. White cum spurt across her teeth. Her tongue darted out to catch. He moaned as he coaxed the last of his load onto her face.

Addison flashed him and Zed the glob on her tongue before swallowing and opening wide. She rubbed some of the jizz that missed her mouth into her cheek and trailed it down to her tongue, sucking it off her fingers. "Mmm, so fucking good..."

Wyatt shook his head and smirked. "Goddamn, Pom-poms."

She shifted her gaze to Zed behind her, "Your turn, Baby."

"You first."

"I insist… I need you on me, coating me." She stood up and faced him. He wound his arms around her used body and kissed her long and deep, putting his whole upper body into the lip lock, submersing her, consuming her with waves of passion and possession, before spinning her back around. He thrust back into her. She closed her eyes and concentrated on the subatomic music they make together. The notes seeping into every crevice and penetrating her soul.

A pair of hands pushed her to a vertical position. Her lids snapped open. Wyatt knelt down in front of her and hugged her thigh, supporting some of her weight before burying his face in her pussy.

It was an awkward angle to accommodate, so she widened her stance, spreading her knees further. Wyatt lowered his head so he was directly under her. His tongue swiped her clit, drawing circles inside and tracing the lines of her labia. His middle finger penetrated her, as his other fingers caressed Zed's balls, making him moan loudly into her ear.

Wyatt's tongue shifted from her over to Zed's sack.

Addison watched from her awkward perch with fascination. "I swear, sex has never been so hot… even by our standards." She could feel both of them laugh in response.

Wyatt's tongue was everywhere at once. On her pussy, her clit, Zed's balls, and even his shaft as it pounded into her ass. No inhibitions within a twenty-foot-radius. Somehow Zed's cock got harder, penetrating deeper.

Addison was on the edge. The cold air, the scent of dried cum on her face, and the sounds of Wyatt licking them converged into one massive sensory overload.

Zed pushed Wyatt out of the way and stepped in front of her. His brows pulled together, his lips parting slightly as he ran his tongue along her name tattooed on his lip. He nailed her with a look of pure devotion.

"I need you to cum for me," she whispered, opening her mouth.

Wyatt watched with an awed expression.

Zed let out a muffled declaration of pleasure between clenched teeth, along with enough cum to fill her mouth twice over. She desperately swallowed, wanting more. She grabbed his cock and sucked, making his legs tremble as she coaxed out the last few stubborn drops. He fell against the wall, looking dazed for several seconds.

She smeared his jizz over her skin as she did with Wyatt's, licking her lips and smiling before kissing him.

Zed pressed a thumb against her aching nub and rubbed. Pressing his forehead to hers, he whispered, "You didn't come."

"I didn't need to," she breathed with a smile.

Zed looked to Wyatt. "Help me out?"

Wyatt swaggered over, "My pleasure."

Zed lifted her by the armpits and shoved her into Wyatt's waiting arms. Wyatt supported her under her butt like a human chair, facing Zed with her legs spread wide. She smiled and leaned into the rock star behind her to tease the rock star in front of her.

Wyatt braced himself against the brick wall. Now it was Zed's turn to get on his knees. Wyatt adjusted his position so that her pussy was parallel with Zed's mouth.

"Your pussy beads droplets like dew on flower blossoms," Zed flicked out his tongue and dipped in for a quick drink.

"Gods, you're such a poet." She relaxed into Wyatt's arms as Zed stroked her tits under her shirt, pulling and pinching her piercings.

"Tell him what you want, Addie," Wyatt whispered into her ear.

"Tongue-fuck me," she moaned, barely able to form the words.

"Gladly." His deep voice vibrated her clit. He licked her slow, with exaggerated sweeps up, down, left, right, in, out, coaxing hot juices from deep inside her.

"Now stick your fingers in." She caressed his green hair, taming his gel and sweat hardened tresses. "Two of them."

He did. Then he lapped up the escaping trickle while pumping her. He put his palm into it, increasing the speed. His mouth retracted when he found her happy spot, making her cry out. Wyatt's grip tightened. She was trapped between the two of them, loving every second of it.

Her breath came in and out in great gasps. Her legs bucked against the onslaught of rising ecstasy. Her hips grinding desperately against his fingers.

"God, please… please… make me come." Her body was on the verge of breaking apart. She was coming undone, unraveling, seduced by the forbidden, but dying for more. "Yes, yes, yes!"

Arching her back into Wyatt's front, she cut loose a spray of clear fluid all over Zed's arm. She twisted, wrestled, and screamed as the climax consumed the last of her control in a quick burst.

Wyatt's triumphant laughter drew her back to reality. When she came to, Zed was grinning like the joker in a deck of cards, fingers still lodged inside her, covered in her juice.

"Jesus..." She couldn't catch her breath.

Wyatt lowered her to the ground."You have got to teach Wills how to do that," he laughed as Addison wobbled. Zed caught her, holding her up because she seriously couldn't stand. He pulled them both in for another kiss. "I'll see you both next door in a few," he breathed against their lips. "This tour is going to be fan-fucking-tastic."

Zed and Addison watched as he walked off back into the darkened staircase. They both slowly turned towards one another.

"We're okay… right?" she whispered, her voice trembling with nervousness.

He smiled softly and pushed her white hair away from her face as he cradled her cheek. "Baby… I love you. This is who we are. Who we've always been. I see no reason why we can't have some fun as long as we do it together."

Her face broke out in a breathtaking smile. "Oh thank the gods you feel that way too," she giggled in

relief.

He closed the small distance between them and kissed her hard, not stopping until they were both panting for air. "If we don't leave this roof-top soon, we're going to end up going another round," he breathed as his forehead rested against hers.

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

He chuckled quietly. "Baby, I promise you I want to as well, but… I think we've pushed our luck up here enough for one evening," he said with a wink. "Besides, we still have to figure out how in the hell we're going to keep this a secret with the Pack joining the tour."

* * *

"You two suck!" Willa laughed as Zed and Addison slid into the booth her and Wyatt were currently occupying in the darkly lit back corner of the bar.

"We also swallow," Addison offered with a shrug before breaking out into a fit of giggles and launching herself across the table to hug her.

"Ugh, I've missed you," Willa said hugging her tight. She glanced over towards Zed, "You too, Zedward."

He shook his head and flipped her off. "Missed you too, Wills."

When the two girls finally separated Willa nailed them both with a hard stare. "So… from the very limited information my brother managed to gather before your impromptu menage a trois..." she turned and scowled at Wyatt.

"Don't be jelly, baby," he laughed, leaning over to kiss her. "You would have done the same thing."

She rolled her eyes and pushed him away. "Anyway, as I was saying… I'm assuming there are some things we need to be aware of BEFORE we sign this contract to join the tour next month?"

Zed held up a finger. "First things first… I didn't even know you guys were still playing!"

"If you hadn't dropped off the face of the fucking earth than maybe you'd know!" Willa snapped.

"I'll get to that part..." Zed sneered. "How in the ever living hell did you guys meet Bucky?"

"We had a gig in New York on the 30th, and he was in the audience. He cornered us after our set was done and…" Wyatt shrugged.

"And then when he asked us to see his other bands play here in Wisconsin, it was perfect."

"Which brings me to my next question," Zed said. "Why are you in Wisconsin? We're nowhere near Seattle."

Willa rolled her eyes again. "My grandmother was sick. So… we all moved out here last year so I could help take care of her. You know family means everything to me."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Addison offered, reaching across the table to hold her hand.

"Thanks, Pom-poms… She's in a better place now… So..." She squeezed Addison's hand. "Start talking you two."

Zed let out a laugh. "How much time do you have?"

* * *

"Where the hell have you been?" Lacey rasped out as Addison opened the door to the bus an hour later.

Addison rolled her eyes, ignoring her and walking over to where Tracey was hunched over the bench seat scribbling in his notebook across from Jacey. She sat down next to him and rested her head against his back.

Tracey laughed and shook his head. "You reek of sex, doll-face. Have fun?"

"Understatement," she breathed with a hint of a smile.

"I fully expect all the dirty details," he said as he shifted around to put his arm around her and hug her. "But seriously, you need a shower."

"Fine," she huffed dramatically. "Hint taken."

"There was no hint there, honey-bunny. Just straight up facts. No amount of Chanel no.5 can cover that up!"

Her chest shook with silent laughter. "Is Bucky back yet?"

"Do you think we'd still be parked here if he were?" Lacey snapped.

"Considering not everyone is back on the bus, yeah," Addison replied.

Lacey rolled her eyes and coughed before looking back down to her phone.

"She's still in a mood," Tracey whispered as Jacey tried to cover a laugh.

Addison shrugged. "If you want tonight's deets, you know where to find me," she smiled standing up and stretching just as the door of the bus opened back up. She bit her lip and tried to resist the urge to run into his arms.

"Oh, joy..." Lacey sneered.

"Zedikins!" Tracey called out.

"Hey, Trace…Princess… Jacey… Lucifer…" he said greeting them all. "Anyone in the shower?"

Lacey held her middle finger high in the air in response.

"Actually, I just called dibs," Addison said a little breathier than she intended.

He met her eyes and arched his brow in silent question.

Tracey shook his head from side to side quickly, making both Zed and Addison sigh in disappointment.

"Buzzkill," Addison whispered elbowing him.

"I'll meet you in there in a minute," he laughed pushing her towards the hallway. He turned and looked towards Zed. "Bonzo was looking for you. He's face-timing his girl right now in the kitchen."

"Thanks, Trace," Zed winked following Addison down the hall with Tracey and Jacey right behind him.

"Man..." Jacey said as they walked past the bunks. "Is she always like that?"

"Who?" Addison asked from the ladder of her bunk with her shower bag in hand.

He motioned his head back towards the front of the bus where Lacey still was.

"If by giant bitch, then the answer is yes," Zed smirked.

"Trust fall!" Addison called out as she let go of the ladder and fell into Zed's arms.

He laughed and set her on her feet, his hands lingering on her waist. "And what would you have done if I hadn't caught you?"

"Well then I guess Tracey or Jacey would have," she teased with a sassy smile.

His eyes narrowed as he walked her into the ladder with his chest. "I don't think so..."

"So! Zed..." Tracey interrupted, clearing his throat. "Did I mention Bonzo was looking for you?!"

Addison slipped out of his embrace and opened the bunk curtains below hers. "Where?"

"In here!" Bonzo called from the kitchen. "Bree wants to talk to you, Princess!"

"Oh I miss her already!" she shrieked as she rushed into the kitchen.

Jacey gave Zed and Tracey a questioning look.

"Bree is Bonzo's girlfriend, she's also Princess's best friend," Tracey offered in explanation as Zed continued into the kitchen.

"Oh… sorry, one more question..."

"Shoot."

"Why does everyone keep calling Casey, Princess?"

Tracey laughed. "Eliza came up with it because she couldn't keep all the A-C-E-Y names straight, and with the white hair, Snow White, Princess… it just all kind of worked and it stuck."

Jacey nodded and followed him into the kitchen.

"Hey, home bestie!" Tracey shouted from behind Bonzo, Zed, and Addison towards the screen.

"Hey, road bestie!" Bree answered. "Are you keeping our girl out of trouble?"

"Is that even possible?"

Addison smacked him playfully. "I can't help it if I have a thing for trouble..." she giggled, stealing a glance towards Zed who bit ran his tongue along his lower lip.

"Wow… everyone's back here..."

They all looked up to find Eliza standing in the doorway.

"Woah, E..." Zed said. "You don't look so hot."

"Fuck you too, Zed."

"Seriously, though… you ok?"

She nodded her head for a second, looking down to the ground. "Actually… Princess?"

"Yeah?" Addison asked.

"Can we… maybe talk for a minute?"

"Of course," she smiled. She blew a kiss towards Bree and stole another quick glance at Zed before grabbing Eliza's hand and pulling her towards the bathroom. "Alright…" she said locking the door and turning to Eliza. "What wrong?"

Eliza wiped at her eyes. "This doesn't leave this room… any of it!"

Addison pretended to lock her lips. "Of course."

"Bucky signed another band."

"I already know."

"You do?"

She nodded.

"I didn't know he told anyone."

"He didn't… I had to find out from their guitarist earlier tonight."

Eliza gave her a questioning look.

"I may have hooked up with him after the show," she shrugged, waving it off.

Eliza sighed as she slid down the door, hugging her knees. "It's not like I didn't know what was going to happen if I stayed behind… I mean, we flirted like crazy that night in New York… I just..." she wiped at her eyes. "I just can't believe I cheated on him..."

"Woah..." Addison dropped to her knees in front of Eliza. "You cheated on my brother?"

Eliza nodded, not even bothering to try and stop the tears from running down her face.

"With who?"

"Willa… The Pack's bassist."

"Gorgeous, wild hair, confidence for days?"

"That would be her… How did you know?"

"Oh, I..." Addison quickly scrambled for a cover. "… looked them up earlier after sleeping with Wyatt."

Eliza nodded in understanding.

"Where were you guys?"

"At the bar."

"You fucked her at the bar?! Damn!"

"God no!" Eliza rushed out. "We just kissed!"

Addison's mouth dropped open. "Wait… you just kissed? That's it?"

Eliza sniffled. "Just enough to ruin my relationship."

Addison shook her head and smiled. "Okay, first off, if my idiot-brother breaks up with you for kissing a beautiful, talented, woman like Willa, you two have deeper issues."

"I can't tell him, Addison!"

"E… you shouldn't keep secrets from each other." She pulled her into a hug. "It was just a kiss. It'll be fine."

"But his crazy family..."

"Has no room to talk! His parents are divorced, and his dad has like three mistresses at any given time. They are a far cry from the idealistic mafioso family they pretend to be."

Eliza nodded against her neck and laughed. "...You really need a shower..."

Addison laughed and pulled away. "So I've been told… You going to be okay?"

She sniffled and nodded again. "Thank you… I couldn't talk to anyone else about this..."

"Secrets are hard to keep. Especially when it comes to ones involving the heart… You can talk to me anytime."

"Same goes for you."

"I'll keep that in mind..."

"Alright..." Eliza said as she glanced over to the mirror and fixed her smudged eye makeup. "I'm going to go hide out in my bunk and try to figure out how to talk to Bucky about this."

"Good luck."

"Thanks, Addison," she said hugging her again. "Now shower… please."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah...out you go," Addison laughed shooing her out the door. She let out a deep breath and walked over to the shower, turning on the water.

As she waited for it to warm, she couldn't help but think back over the events of the day. Their first day back on tour after break. Their first day having to keep their new relationship a secret. The afternoon spent together as Zed helped her work on her stage fright like only he could. Singing on stage and the adrenaline rush she had forgotten she needed in life. Wyatt surprising them on the rooftop, and the three of them picking up right where they had left off like no time had passed at all. Learning that The Pack would soon be joining them on the road… She smiled to herself as she stepped under the hot spray. Despite the enormous burden of keeping their secret, she was finally starting to live life again. A melody softly floated through her head.

"Nobody sees, nobody knows

We are a secret, nobody knows

That's how it is, that's how it goes

Far from the others, close to each other..."

The sound of the door opening caught her attention. "Oh thank goodness! Grab my notebook off the counter, Trace! I've got to get this down! And then I promise I'll spill about earlier!"

The sound of rustling could be heard.

"It should be next to my bra… find it?"

"Mmhmm..."

"Great! Just write D Major vocal on the top, and um… A major, F, C, E major under that… I'll figure out the bass line later..." She grabbed her shampoo and lathered it as she started to sing.

"My asylum, my asylum is in your arms

When the world gives heavy burdens

I can bear a thousand times

On your shoulder, on your shoulder

I can reach an endless sky

Feels like paradise…

Put two and to-gether, for-ever will never change

Two and to-gether will never change

Nobody sees, nobody now

We are a secret, can't be exposed

That's how it is, that's how it goes

Far from the others, close to each other

That's when we uncover, cover, cover

That's when we uncover, cover, cover…

Alright, for the bridge I'm thinking of switching to a D major, A major, F, C, D major again, A major again and..." she hummed for a second, "then an F and a G…

We could build a universe right here

All the world could disappear

Wouldn't notice, wouldn't care

We could build a universe right here

The world could disappear

Yeah I just need you near…

Oooh… it might be even better on the piano. Or maybe you could be on keyboard? What do you think?"

"I think it'll sound beautiful either way as long as you're singing it."

Her hands stilled in her hair. "Jacey!" she exclaimed, popping her head out of the shower curtain. "I thought you were Tracey!"

"Sorry, didn't mean to startle you," he said with a nervous chuckle.

"...It's fine..." she breathed out, relieved that she hadn't said anything more. "… Thank you for writing that down for me..."

"You're welcome," he laughed, placing her notebook back down onto the small counter. "You're extremely talented… you know that, right?"

"Thank you… So, um… Is there something you needed?" she asked as she went back to rinsing her hair.

"I actually wanted to ask if you'd like to go to dinner tomorrow evening before the show?"

"Sure, Tracey and I usually just grab take-out or hit up the closest diner. You're more than welcome to join us."

"I meant just you and me… like a date..."

Her hands stilled again. "Aren't you and Lacey together?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "I mean, we had some fun back in New York… but we aren't exclusive… and I can't have just been imagining that spark between us on stage? Right?"

"Jacey..." she sighed, trying to find the right words to diffuse the situation. "I'm flattered, really… but..."

"But she has a boyfriend!" Tracey said as he pushed the door to the small bathroom open.

"She does?" He looked back over towards Addison who had poked her head back out of the shower. "You do?"

She shot Tracey a warning glare before looking back towards Jacey with a smile, nodding her head.

"Oh… I had no idea… no one said..." he stammered.

"It's fine, Jacey. It just happened over the break while I was back home."

"But I thought you were out earlier..."

"She didn't even tell me until this morning!" Tracey exclaimed in mock indignation, cutting him off. "Can you believe that?! And then he surprises her by catching her first show back. Ugh… so romantic..."

Jacey held his hands up. "I'm sorry if I overstepped."

"No harm, no foul."

He pointed to the door. "I'm just going to..."

She waived as Tracey stepped out of the way and let him out. As soon as the door closed behind him, they both let out a breath.

"Someone was about two seconds from breaking down the door."

"Thank you for getting here first," she whispered. "Z would have beaten the shit out of him."

"Damn right I would have," Zed said from the doorway. "He looks a little too long for my liking."

"Z..." Addison warned. "He doesn't know we're together. And, we aren't in high school anymore. You can't just beat up everyone who looks at me. That's the quickest way to blow our cover!"

"No… I'm pretty sure the quickest way to blow your cover is the way you two act whenever you're within ten feet of one another," Tracey laughed. "Let's work on that. M'kay!"

"Can you blame me?" Addison smiled cheekily.

"No… God, I wish that stupid contract didn't exist. You two are perfect together."

"Yeah… but it does. And as long as you want to keep your band intact..." Zed said as he pushed off the door and walked closer to them.

"I know..." Tracey sighed leaning against Zed's shoulder. He pulled back with a look of disgust. "You need a shower too… and why are you sticky?"

"Oops," Addison laughed.

He shook his head. "You're lucky I love you guys… You've got ten minutes. I'll guard the door."

* * *

The bus was quiet with only the soft snores from the bunks around them and the steady rhythm of the road underneath them.

"I should really go back over to my bunk before I fall asleep," Addison whispered, placing a soft kiss on his chest, as Zed's fingers continued to run through her hair.

"What if I set an alarm?"

She shook her head. "I don't want to risk sleeping through it, or having it wake someone else up."

"This sucks."

"I know, Baby." She sat up and repositioned herself so she was straddling his waist. "But, we have a two-nighter coming up next weekend. And I'm thinking another hotel stay will be desperately needed by then."

He smiled and grabbed onto her ass. "I'm thinking another hotel stay is desperately needed now," he whispered as he pulled her down for a kiss. "I already miss having you in a real bed."

She giggled against his lips. "I'm sorry that a stage, a rooftop, a shower, and your bunk aren't good enough..."

"Oh, you know I love the creativity, but at least when we have a real bed it means I can fall asleep and wake up with you." He ran his hand down the side of her face, cradling her chin. "I love you."

"I adore you."

"Forever."

"And after," she whispered leaning in for another kiss.

Their tender moment was interrupted by the feel of the bus coming to a stop.

"Why are we..."

Zed held a finger over her lips as he leaned closer to his bunk curtain.

"What's going on?" Bonzo asked sleepily.

"I don't know yet," Bucky answered walking past.

The sound of bunk curtains opening around them had them both panicking.

"Shit!" she whispered. "What are we going to do?"

"I'll head out, try to figure out what's going on… I'll text you when it's clear for you to duck out."

She nodded her head and rolled off. "You might want to put something on first..."

He chuckled quietly. "Good thinking." He grabbed his boxers and pulled them on before carefully pulling back his bunk curtain just enough for him to slip out.

Addison waited anxiously as the voices of their bandmates filled the narrow hall. After a few minutes, the voices had faded. She was about to text Zed when his curtain opened back up. She panicked for a split second before she saw him.

"You scared me!" she whispered, smacking him.

"Sorry. All clear. Everyone is outside."

"What happened?"

"Bus overheated. We're waiting for road-side assistance or something. I came back in because it's fucking freezing and I was in my underwear," he laughed as he rooted around for some clothes. "You coming out or you wanna head over to your bunk?"

"I'll come outside. Let me just grab some sweatpants."

He leaned in and kissed her. "I'll see you outside, Baby."

A few minutes later Addison walked off the bus, yawning a little more exaggerated than necessary. "What's going on?" she asked Bucky sleepily as he walked passed.

"Bus fucking overheated," he snapped.

"Jeez… moody much?"

"And where the hell were you?"

"Sleeping..."

Bucky rolled his eyes. "I gathered as much, but I was asking him." He said motioning behind her to the door.

She turned around to see Jacey standing there.

"I went to the bathroom," he shrugged.

Bucky lit a cigarette and walked off.

"This has definitely been an interesting first day..." Jacey said, offering Addison a smile.

"I'd like to say it's not always this crazy..." she looked around at all of them standing on the side of the highway. "But… it kind of is."

"Good to know."

She patted him on the shoulder and walked off towards Eliza, who was standing away from the rest of the group smoking. "Hey..."

"Hey..." Eliza answered back, offering her a cigarette.

Addison took one from the pack and lit it. "Thanks… I'm guessing you told him?"

"Yep… right before we pulled over… How's that for timing."

Addison cringed. "How'd he take it?"

"You tell me?" she said gesturing over to the other end of the bus where Bucky was pacing furiously.

Addison rolled her eyes. "I'll talk to him."

"You don't have to… It was my mistake," she sighed. "I just hope he can forgive me."

"Listen to me, Eliza… my brother loves you. He would have never brought you to meet his family if he didn't." She took a drag off of her cigarette and exhaled. "He's probably just pissed off he wasn't there to witness it."

Eliza smirked and rolled her eyes.

"It'll be fine..." she leaned over and smacked a kiss on Eliza's cheek and turned around towards her step-brother. As she walked past Zed, her pinkie finger linked with his for the briefest of moments.

"Saw that honey-bunny," Tracey whispered with a giggle, throwing his arm around her.

"As long as it was just you," she said with a wink. "I'll be right back..."

"Good, your boy-toy is going to grab his acoustic."

Addison bit her lip and whimpered.

"I know," Tracey giggled. "Hurry back!"

"I will!" she sprinted to the end of the bus. "Hey, Bucky..."

"I have nothing to say to you right now," he said, not bothering to turn around.

"Fine… then you can listen."

He spun around and glared at her. "What aren't you getting? I don't want to talk to you right now!"

"What the fuck did I do?"

He took a step closer to her. "Were you going to tell me?"

"Tell you what?!"

"About what?! About your new boyfriend!"

Her eyes widened. How could he have possibly have found out about Zed? "How did you..."

"Jacey told me earlier!" he sneered. "Why the hell should I have to find out you have a boyfriend from someone I literally just met a week ago! I thought we were past keeping secrets!"

She let out a sigh of relief. "Did it ever occur to you that maybe I told Jacey I had a boyfriend to keep him from asking me out again?"

"I don't fucking buy it."

"Excuse me?" she asked, her voice teetering on the edge of a threat.

"You staying at your Dad's instead of Bree's, your sudden switch from your usual sour mood…"

"Let's get one thing straight. What I do and whom I do it with is none of your goddamn business. You want to talk secrets? How about we talk about yours then! It's not like you haven't been keeping shit from me."

"Like what?!"

"Come la nuova band che hai firmato..." She yelled back in Italian. The shocked look on his face would have been comical if she wasn't so pissed off at him.

"How did you..."

"Damnnnnnn, Princess!" Tracey called over. "You can yell at me any day in a foreign language! That was hot as hell! What was that?!"

Addison rolled her eyes and grabbed Bucky's arm, pulling him further away. "I had to find out after fucking their lead singer tonight!"

"You did what?!"

"You heard me. So, now do you believe me that I don't have a boyfriend?"

"But he has a girlfriend! Jesus! The last thing I need is more fucking drama between bands! First Eliza and now you!"

"Relax, they have an open relationship and his girlfriend knows… She's pretty cool. And you need to not be such a prick to your girlfriend. It was just a fucking kiss and she feels fucking terrible about it."

He mumbled something under his breath about Willa before sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I swear I want to strangle you sometimes..."

"Right back at you, brother-dear."

"I'm sorry."

"For what exactly?" she snapped.

"For not believing you and for not telling you about The Pack… I should have told you over the break."

She felt like shit for going off on him and lying to him, but deep down she knew it had to be done to keep him from suspecting anything. She let out a calming breath. "It's fine, B… I told you to treat me like every other member of the band and you did… so… thank you… I guess… Now go apologize to your girlfriend!"

He chuckled humorlessly. "I will… I think I'm more in shock than actually pissed." He shook his head and re-lit his cigarette. "And just so you know, I was planning on telling you before anyone else. It just happened so fast."

"And just when are you planning on telling everyone else?"

"When I unveil the new tour merch."

Her eyes widened. "We have merch?"

"Well, not yet… I'm still finalizing the order… If you maybe wanted to look it over and help finalize the designs…?"

She smiled and shook her head. "Is this your way of getting back in my good graces?"

"...Maybe..."

She rolled her eyes. "Come on… grab your girl and let's go take a look."

ZzZzZzZzZzZ

"Damnnnnnn, Princess!" Tracey called over. "You can yell at me in a foreign language any day! That was hot! What was that?!"

"Italian..." Zed said from next to him, suddenly paying a little closer attention to the argument they were having in the distance.

Eliza slumped on the ground next to them, leaning her head against Zed's shoulder. "Can today just be over yet?" she whined.

"Road-weary already?" he asked, kissing the top of her head affectionately.

"Something like that… If I weren't so tired I'd be beating the shit out of my kit right now."

"You wanna practice? I can switch this out for my electric," he said holding up the neck of his acoustic guitar.

She shook her head. "No… too tired..."

"Something slow then?"

She contemplated it for a second. "I could do that… Bonz!" she called out.

He looked up from his phone. "What up?"

"Want to jam?"

"Now?" he asked looking around.

"What else are we going to do?" Zed laughed before stealing another glance towards Addison.

Bonzo shrugged. "Alright… let me grab my bass."

"Can you grab my practice pad while you're in there?" Eliza asked with a pout.

Bonzo rolled his eyes and nodded.

Zed looked back over towards Addison, trying not to laugh at the look of murderous rage on her face. He didn't know what they were arguing about, but he felt sorry for Bucky. He'd been on the receiving end of that look quite a few times. _God is she hot when she's pissed_. He thought to himself as he plucked out a few notes.

"Oh, you know that I want you so bad…

Everyone has a secret

But can they keep it

Oh no they can't…" he sang softly, more to himself than anything.

"That was unexpectedly good..." Eliza laughed.

"Gee, thanks, E."

She elbowed him just as Bonzo walked back out with their gear.

"Good timing. Z's got something," she said tapping her sticks across the practice pad on the ground.

"Perfect… you start off, I'll jump in..."

Zed nodded and started playing again.

"Car overheats

Jump out of my seat

On the side of the highway baby..."

Eliza and Bonzo both laughed.

"Our road is long

Your hold is strong

Please don't ever let go. Oh no.

Oh you know that I want you so bad

Everyone has a secret

But can they keep it

Oh no they can't

I'm driving fast now

Don't think I know how to go slow

Where you at now

I feel around

There you are..."

He looked back over towards Addison and ran his tongue along the bottom of his lip.

"Cool these engines

Calm these jets

I ask you how hot can it get

and as you wipe off beads of sweat

Slowly you say "I'm not there yet!"

Oh you know that I want you so bad

Everyone has a secret

But can they keep it

Oh no they can't..."

"Hey, Tracey..." Jacey said as he turned away from Lacey.

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure..."

They walked further away as Zombies continued to play, in the opposite direction of Bucky and Addison.

"Are Casey and Zed together?"

Tracey's eyes widened for a split second before he laughed the comment off. "That would be a negative. I'm sure you read every page of the contract you signed when you became an Acey?"

"Yeah… that last page made zero sense then, and even less so now."

"Zed is off-limits. Plain and simple."

"They just seem..."

"Look, Zed has been helping her with some… performance anxiety. That's it. Casey signed the same contract that we all did… and, like I said earlier, she's dating someone from back home..." he lowered his voice even more, "Besides, she is soooo out of his league."

"If you say so..."

"I do," he answered a little too quickly. "Now… I'm going to go grab a drink back on the bus. You want one?"

Jacey looked back towards the group. His glance lingering a beat longer on Zed as he watched Casey in the distance talking with Bucky. "Yeah… I'll be right in."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:** I really tried to get this finished last week, but… life. Anywho… Apparently some people were majorly offended by the last chapter. Who knew two guys kissing would be the thing in this story that pushed the envelope too far. For the readers who have stuck by me and are enjoying this crazy ride, Thank You. Your endless support and words of encouragement mean everything!

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER**

Uncover- Zara Larsson (Huge shout-out to Taylor for recommending this song on IG. I had never heard it before, but as soon as I did I couldn't wait to use it in this story!)

Secret- Maroon 5


	34. True Disaster

**On The Edge**

**Chapter 34**

**TRUE DISASTER**

Zed quietly strummed out a tune on his acoustic guitar, trying his best to ignore the numbness that was spreading through him from the biting cold, while Eliza snuggled up against him for warmth. They had been broken down on the side of the road for hours, all of them too cold to sleep. He looked across to the other bench where Addison and Tracey were huddled under a blanket together. Irrational jealousy warming him slightly. As if she could feel his eyes on her, she looked up and smirked. He shook his head and smiled. She always could read him easily. He arched his brow and glanced down at his guitar, asking her a silent question. She nodded and sat up ever so slightly.

"I tremble  
I quiver  
I shake  
I shiver..." she sang looking into his eyes, wishing she were the one next to him.

"Ha. ha. ha..." Bucky said looking over to her. "Very funny. But please… continue."

She shrugged her shoulders and smiled, sitting up a little more and looking back into Zed's eyes.

"Looking back  
Looking further  
Staring right into your eyes  
Drowning there  
Drowning deeper  
Drowning til I…  
Come for you  
Come to you  
Come in you  
Next to me  
Or far away  
When you say my name

I tremble  
I quiver  
I shake I shiver..."

Lacey huffed. "She does one show, and all of a sudden she thinks she's a singer and won't shut the fuck up."

"Shouldn't you be resting your voice?" Eliza snapped.

"She's right..." Bucky chimed in, putting Lacey in her place. "Besides… I'm always up for new material..." He looked back over at Addison and motioned for her to keep going.

Zed fought back a smile as she started back up.  
"Screaming  
Deep down  
I feel like  
I'm bout to die  
To drown  
To cry  
I'm bout to  
Enter the sky

You take my hand  
You take my mind  
Take my life  
I give it up  
I'll give you all  
One more time..." she threw him a quick wink.

"I tremble  
I quiver  
I shake  
I shiver

I tremble  
I quiver  
I shake  
I shiver..."

As the song came to an end, Bucky started to clap. "That's what I'm talking about!"

Jacey yawned and shivered from the cold at the same time. "That would sound sick with a light bass drum," he added in, making Lacey sneer in his direction.

"We're not playing anything HE helped write!" she spat glowering over towards Zed. "It's still MY band!"

"Again, vocal rest?" Eliza questioned before looking at Bucky. "How much longer?" she whined, her teeth chattering in between words. Zed rubbed her shoulders, trying to warm her.

Bucky shrugged. "Don't know…"

"I still don't understand why we have to sit here!"

"Lacey..." Bucky sighed. "For the hundredth time… we don't want to kill the battery. The tow truck should be here soon."

"You've been saying that for the last three hours!" she shouted before breaking into a coughing fit.

Addison buried herself further into Tracey's chest, "Where are we?"

"The bus."

She lifted her middle finger in her step-brother's direction. "Not what I meant."

His chest shook with silent laughter. "About 20 minutes outside of Green Bay."

Addison sat up quickly, nearly knocking Tracey off the cold bench they were sharing. "Seriously?!"

Bucky rubbed his hands together, desperate for the heat from the friction. "Yeah."

"Why didn't you say so sooner?!"

"Oh no!" Bonzo whined.

"Oh, yes!"

"What am I missing?" Bucky asked looking between the two of them.

"Bree!"

"What does Bree have to do with any of this?" Tracey asked.

Addison ruffled his hair. "Her family lives in Green Bay most of the year!"

"Princess!" Bonzo whined.

She rolled her eyes and looked over to Bucky, poking her bottom lip out in a pout.

"What?"

"Can I call and ask for a ride? Mr. Mack wouldn't want one of his honorary kids to freeze to death when he's only a short distance away and could totally come to the rescue..."

Tracey joined in on the pouting. "I have no idea who he is, but if there's heat, I'm in!"

Bucky met Addison's eyes. "Are you sure?"

She nodded her head quickly and grabbed her phone out of her back pocket. "I'm so cold, I don't give a shit right now."

ZzZzZzZzZ

Thirty minutes later, a very large pearl SUV pulled over on the side of the highway in front of the bus.

"Oh, thank fuck!" Addison exclaimed as she opened the door and ran over to the very large man who was waiting for her with open arms.

Jacey looked out the window, wiping the sleep from his eyes. "I've got to be suffering from hypothermia delusions... or maybe it's the sunrise playing tricks on my eyes or something… that man looks a whole hell of a lot like Mack Truck Jeffrey..."

"Who?" Lacey yawned as she watched the man outside effortlessly lift Addison off the ground in a bear hug.

"That's because he is," Bonzo sighed.

Jacey's jaw dropped open. He slowly turned towards Bonzo with wide eyes. "You're..."

"Dating his daughter..." he swallowed loudly and stood up. "Yeah."

"Again, who?" Lacey asked as Bonzo walked out the door.

Jacey stared at her. "Legendary defensive back for the Green Bay Packers… How do you NOT know who he is?"

"What? I don't do sports," she said with a shrug.

Tracey laughed from next to them. "You just do the athletes who used to wander in to see you spin around on the pole," he teased.

Lacey cracked a smile and flipped him off.

ZzZzZzZzZ

"Remember, you don't know Zed, and nobody knows Bartholomew is my brother," Addison whispered just as Bonzo approached.

Mack laughed and patted her head. "Oh, Addison… what have you gotten yourself into?"

"Trouble, like always," she smiled back to him. "And it's Casey!"

"Feel free to call her Princess, it's just easier," Bonzo offered sheepishly, holding out his hand. "It's nice to see you again, sir."

"James," Mack answered, shaking Bonzo's outstretched hand. He shook his head and looked back over to Addison. "Princess?"

She shrugged. "They all seem to call me that."

"It's certainly fitting."

She rolled her eyes. "Not you too," she laughed.

He hugged her again. "Well, you better get everyone out here. Carla is already cooking breakfast for all of you."

"Of course she is," Addison smiled. "Thank you again."

"It's no trouble at all, sweetheart."

ZzZzZzZzZ

"MA! I'm home!" Addison called out playfully as she walked into a large marble entryway. The smell of french toast wafting through the air.

"I'm in Mack Truck Jeffery's house!" Jacey squealed excitedly.

Lacey rolled her eyes. "Oh, how the other half lives..." she muttered under her breath. "No wonder she can afford all those shoes."

"It smells amazing in here…" Zed practically moaned. "I missed..." he caught himself and changed directions quickly. "...the smell of home cooking."

Addison bit back a smile just as an older woman made the corner.

"There she is!" she exclaimed pulling Addison down into a tight hug. "Oh, you're freezing!" She took a step back giving her a long hard look and tisked. "And Bree was right… you do need a good home-cooked meal, honey. Good thing I made french toast… James, such a nice surprise to see you again."

Zed silently cheered. Ms. Carla's french toast had gotten them through some rough mornings back in high school. It truly was the stuff of legends.

"Good to see you too," Addison smiled before turning around to the rest of the group. "Guys, this is Bree's mom, Carla."

"We can do introductions in the dining room. Let's get you all warmed up and fed!"

As they walked by Carla nudged Zed's arm. "Good to see you again, Zeddy," she whispered.

"You too," he smiled. "Thanks for making my favorite, Ms. Carla."

ZzZzZzZzZ

The table was quiet as they all sat around stuffed to the brim with food.

"This was insanely decadent and delicious!" Tracey said, rubbing his stomach. "Thank you."

"Oh, you're welcome, Tracey."

"Seriously, though… you did not have to make all of this."

She waved him off. "It was my pleasure."

The sound of the front door opening caught all of their attention. "Hello, hello!"

Addison's eyes went wide with excitement. "Gus!" she exclaimed, pushing herself away from the table and running towards the entranceway.

Jacey's eyes grew large again. "Holy…."

"Do I want to know?" Lacey mumbled next to him.

Before Jacey could respond, a tall, well-built man walked into the dining room carrying Addison under his arm like a football.

"Guys! This is Bree's older brother, Gus!" she said as he set her down on her feet. "Gus, this is everyone… Tracey, Jacey, Lacey, you know Bonzo, and that's Zed..."

Gus bit back a laugh and waved to everyone before extending a hand and shaking Bonzo's.

"You're gorgeous…" Lacey said as she looked up at him.

Addison rolled her eyes. "He's married."

"Happily I might add," Gus laughed as he kissed his mother's cheek.

Carla fussed over her son, "I wasn't expecting you until tomorrow!"

"Well, when Dad called while I was in morning workouts saying he was going and picking this one up," he said hugging Addison close to him again, "I rearranged a few things… I missed you at Christmas, kid."

Addison shrugged. "I was busy."

Gus's eyes found Zed across the room. "I know…" He smiled and ruffled her hair. "But, I also have an ulterior motive..."

Addison pulled away. "Uhoh..."

He barked out a laugh. "Nothing too bad… but… I've got a road game next weekend."

"And..."

"And, I'm going to miss my anniversary… Any chance I can get you to do the thing? It'll score me some pretty serious brownie points with the missus."

"Gus..."

"What thing?" Tracey asked, walking up and resting his head on Addison's shoulder.

"This one here wrote and sang our first dance song at our wedding."

Addison shrugged. "It was their wedding present."

"That's a wonderful idea! You can use the piano in the sitting room, sweetheart," Carla chimed in.

"Lord knows no one around here uses it," Mack added under his breath.

"I'd love to really… But I can't…" Addison sighed dramatically. "It was a duet..." she smiled, meeting Zed's eyes.

"Aren't you guys in bands or something? I'm sure someone could pick up the other

verses," Gus asked, hoping he wasn't being too obvious.

"Well, I for one am WAY too full to sing," Tracey said as he rubbed his stomach dramatically. "I need a nap like yesterday!"

Zed let out a quiet laugh."I can help you out if you'd like."

"You sure?" Addison asked trying to hide her smile.

"I mean, I'll probably need a few practice run-throughs, but I'm sure I can catch on."

"Oh, joy..." Lacey mumbled.

Gus smiled wide and hugged Addison again. "Gabby is going to love this!"

"Alright, alright…" she said, pushing him away. "Give us a few to rehearse and then you can Facetime Gabby." She stood up and grabbed Zed's hand, pulling him across the house towards the large sitting room where the baby grand piano was located.

"Well this is certainly an unexpected trip down memory lane," Zed whispered as he slid onto the piano bench next to her.

She smiled and leaned her head against his shoulder, looking up into his eyes. "You remember what happened the last time we sang this?"

His chest shook with silent laughter. "Yeah… I still can't walk past a storage closet without thinking about that night."

"Have I ever told you how hot you look in a Gucci suit?"

He leaned down to nip her nose playfully. "Hope you have a good memory, because Gucci anything isn't happening again for a loooong time."

She giggled and placed a few soft kissed along his jawline. "This could be a disaster… If Lacey..."

He leaned down and cut her off with a kiss. "I don't give a fuck."

"Easy for you to say, I'm in HER band… and YOU, are off-limits... remember."

"Good thing neither of us believes in limits," he breathed against her lips.

"Trouble."

"You love it."

"So do you."

"Damn right," he smiled, deepening their kiss.

"Some things don't change." They both jumped apart, only to find Gus standing in the doorway.

Addison clutched her chest. "You scared the shit out of me!"

"Good," he laughed.

She flipped him off.

"Mom sent me in to put a few of these away," he said, walking over towards a display table against the wall. "She figured you two would have a lot of questions to answer if anyone saw them."

Addison and Zed both stood up and walked over to the table.

She gasped as she looked through the pictures displayed. "I had no idea these were here!" she whispered, picking up a delicate silver frame that held a picture of her, Zed, Bree, and Mason wearing their cap and gowns at graduation.

"Obviously," Gus laughed as he gathered up pictures from his wedding and from his sister's eighteenth birthday and senior prom. "Um… is that one okay?" he asked her, pointing to another picture in the corner of the table.

Zed started laughing. "I almost forgot you two went to prom together."

Gus sighed. "Yep… When your high school girlfriend dumps you three days before senior prom, your freshman sister sets you up with her best friend."

"As if I wasn't popular already… that night set me for the rest of high school." Addison giggled and hugged him as she pinched his cheek. "You were such a cute date, too."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah…" he said playfully pushing her off. "Does the pic stay or go?"

She shrugged. "Leave it, it's adorable."

"If you say so," he mumbled. He scanned the table one final time. "I think that's about it."

"Thank you," Addison whispered.

"You're welcome. You two are going to have a hard enough time keeping this quiet, it's the least I could do… Just try not to sneak off after you sing the song this time."

Zed snickered as Addison blushed. "You knew about that?"

Gus rolled his eyes. "Everyone knew about that… heard it too," he laughed. "Alright… you guys finish 'practicing' and I'm going to go stash these in my mom's sewing room. Be back in a few."

Addison took Zed's hand and pulled him back towards the piano. "Where were we?"

"Hmmm..." he smiled. "I think… right about…" he leaned in and kissed her. "Here."

She smiled against his lips. "We should practice."

"I think we're pretty good at this, but if you insist..."

She laughed and pushed him away. "We're definitely good at that, but I was referring to the song."

"Oh, fine..." he sighed. "But I already know it. I did help write it, remember?"

"I know. But… you need to practice NOT knowing it," she giggled, leaning over to kiss his cheek.

A few minutes later everyone was gathered in the sitting room. Gus stood at the other end of the piano with his phone so his wife, Gabby could see.

"You ready?" Addison smiled up to Zed.

He nodded and threw her a wink.

"You owe me, Gus… Happy Anniversary Gabby!" she called out as she started to play a twinkling melody on the piano.

"We could leave the Christmas lights up 'til January  
And this is our place, we make the rules  
And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you dear  
Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?

Can I go where you go?  
Can we always be this close?  
Forever and ever, ah  
Take me out, and take me home  
You're my, my, my, my, my lover"

She looked over to Zed as he picked up the next verse. It was almost as if they were back in high school in her music room singing the song together for the first time.

"We could light a bunch of candles  
And dance around the kitchen, baby  
Pictures of when we were young would hang on the wall  
We would sit on the stoop  
I'll sing love songs to you when we're eighty  
See, I finally got you now, honey, I won't let you fall"

His hand brushed across her thigh as she joined in.

"Can I go where you go?  
Can we always be this close?  
Forever and ever, ah  
Take me out, and take me home  
Forever and ever  
You're my, my, my, my lover"

"Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?  
With every guitar string scar on my hand  
I take this magnetic force of a man to be my  
lover"

"Look in my eyes, they will tell you the truth  
The girl in my story has always been you  
I'd go down with the Titanic, it's true, for you"

"Lover"

"And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me  
And at every table, I'll save you a seat."

"Save you a seat"

They subconsciously moved even closer to one another, their foreheads nearly touching as they sang.

"Can I go where you go?"

"Can I go where you go, baby?"

"Can we always be this close?  
Forever and ever, ah  
Take me out, and take me home"

"Forever and ever"

"You're my, my, my, my  
Oh, you're my, my, my, my  
Darling, you're my, my, my, my..."

"Lover" she breathed out the final word, unable to tear her eyes away from his. It was the same thing that would happen every time they sang that song. Even though they had set out to write it for Gus and his soon to be wife all those years ago, the inspiration they drew from their own relationship was obvious to anyone who had known them.

It wasn't until Carla wrapped her arms around both of them and kissed their cheeks did either of them remember there were other people in the room.

"Oh, you two!" Carla gushed.

Addison was still at a loss for words.

Zed squeezed her hand. "It's the least I could do Mrs. Jeffrey. Thank you for your hospitality."

"Oh, nonsense," she teased, pinching his cheek before she turned around to address the rest of the room. "Now, if those yawns you lot were making at the table are any indication, I'd say you all are exhausted. We've got plenty of rooms upstairs if you want to get some shut-eye."

"Really, that's too kind. We wouldn't want to put you out," Tracey said around a loud yawn.

"Please, I'm used to football players taking over my house. A group of rail-thin musicians is nothing. I ought to be cooking you another meal."

"Leather isn't as forgiving as football pads," Addison said with a smirk.

Carla smiled and shook her head. "Okay, up we all go. Gus, Mack?"

"Yes?" They both asked in unison.

"Be dears and show our guests upstairs. I want to talk to my other daughter for a few minutes." She walked over to one of the large plush sofas and patted the seat next to her.

Zed waited until everyone else had passed before stealing a quick kiss and then followed the group upstairs.

Carla laughed. "Honey… this is quite the situation you've gotten yourself into."

"Tell me about it," Addison scoffed as she stood up from the piano and went to sit down next to her. "My brother is my manager, but no one other than his girlfriend knows he's my brother. AND no one knows she's his girlfriend. Zed is my high-school boyfriend, and well… current boyfriend too, but according to the contract my brother signed for me, I can't be involved with him. Jacey and Lacey are the only ones who don't know my real name or who I really am, but Bucky and Eliza don't know that the others know..." she sighed and dropped her head into her hands. "Not to mention I'm going to have to tell Zed about Penny at some point… What am I supposed to do?"

"Let me ask you something..."

Addison sat back up and nodded.

"What do you think your Daddy would tell you to do."

"I try not to think about that," she whispered.

"Well, that's part of the problem, hun." Carla wrapped her up in a tight hug. "You've got to stop running away from who you are."

"I'm trying… I'm singing again."

"And I'm so very happy you are." She lifted Addison's chin to really look at her. "I haven't seen you smile like this in a long time…. And you know just as well as I do what your Daddy would tell you right now."

Addison smiled. "Why don't you tell me anyway."

"He'd tell you to follow your heart… So… what is your heart telling you?"

"The exact opposite of what's good for me. As per usual."

"And that would be?"

"That I need to be myself and I need to be with Zed… damn the consequences."

"Well then, I guess you should start listening to it."

"I know but..."

"But what?"

"I don't want to ruin things. The band would fall apart and my brother would be pissed..."

Carla arched a brow. "Those sound like half-truths and excuses. Bucky would support you no matter what. I'm sure you could make it all work… So you wanna tell me what's really holding you back?"

"Fine..."

Addison sighed. "I'm scared of failing… and more importantly, what if I tell Zed and he leaves me? I don't want to get hurt again. You know what I was like the last time."

"I swear I'm going to knock your momma out if I ever see her again. Who does that to their own child!"

"My mother," Addison deadpanned.

Carla muttered a few curses before hugging Addison again. "If he really loves you, he won't leave… But you've got take that risk. It's part of living."

Addison pouted. "I hate when I know you're right."

Carla laughed and hugged her even tighter. "That boy has always made you happy and you've always brought out the best in one another… He's also grown into quite the looker," she added in a whisper.

Addison shook with silent laughter.

"And as far as failing… you have been singing for as long as I've known you. You were born to be a star."

"Thanks, Ma."

"You're welcome, honey... Oh, I've missed you... Now if only I could get Bree to visit me out here sometime!" she said with a laugh.

"I'll see what I can do."

Carla kissed the top of her head. "Now you go run along and get some sleep."

"Zed's in my sister's room," Gus teased as he and his father walked back in.

"As tempting as that information is, I can't… too risky with Lacey around," she sighed.

"I do not trust that girl!" Carla interjected. "She asks way too many questions for my liking… not to mention the advances she kept making on my son."

Addison laughed and hugged her. "No one trusts her!" She stood up and walked over to the piano and sat down. "Besides, sleep can wait. You gave me a lot to think about, and I do my best thinking right here."

"I know you don't want to hear this, but your Daddy would be proud of you."

"I don't know about that… but I'll get there… one day."

Carla stood up and walked over to her, hugging her again.

* * *

"Ten minutes!" Bucky warned, popping his head into the green room.

Zed looked over and caught Addison's eye as he stood up and stretched. "I'm going to grab a quick cigarette..." he mumbled, throwing her a wink and heading for the door.

Addison gave it about thirty seconds before she stood up and made some excuse about needing to use the lady's room, ignoring the look that Tracey and Bonzo were throwing her way as she walked out the door.

She had barely made it around the corner before she felt his hand reach out and grab hers, pulling her towards the delivery entrance. "You know we really need to work on our excuses," she laughed as he pulled her out into the cold night air.

"I told you. I don't give a fuck anymore," he smiled, pressing her up against the cold steel door and kissing her. "I miss having you all to myself."

"I know," she breathed, hitching her leg around his waist.

"First night headlining. Nervous?"

"Strangely enough… no." She bit back a moan as his teeth scraped along her collarbone.

He shook his head and kissed a trail back up to her lips. "Only you could pull off writing a song that quickly."

"What can I say, I was inspired," she teased.

"Game on, baby. I hate opening. Don't think I'm going to take it easy on you because I love you."

"When have either of us ever taken it easy on the other?"

"True… Meet me back out here after?"

"Like you even need to ask," she whispered against his lips before biting down. "I miss having you all to myself, too."

Zed moaned and grabbed her ass. "I love you."

"I adore you."

"Forever."

"And after," she giggled as his teeth found her neck once again.

A sharp rap on the door broke them apart. He quickly set Addison back down on her feet and took a few steps away.

"I thought you didn't give a fuck?" she whispered.

He blew her a kiss and pulled a cigarette out just as Bonzo opened the door.

"Break it up love birds. Bucky's looking for you and we've got a show to do!"

ZzZzZzZzZ

Addison made her way through the crowded club and over towards the bar where Bucky was standing. "Is there a reason you sent Bonzo into the lady's room to find me?" she asked with a laugh as she tapped his shoulder. "And why aren't you backstage with everyone else?"

He turned around and smiled. "Because we've got a VIP tonight who wanted to see you."

She arched her brow. "Who?" No sooner did the question leave her lips did she feel a pair of strong arms wrap around her mid-section and lift her off the ground in a bear hug.

"Me!"

"Gus!" she exclaimed, swatting at his arm until he set her down. "What are you doing here?" She looked around him anxiously.

"What are you looking for?" he asked as he and Bucky performed the same intricate handshake they had perfected back in high school.

"I'm looking for the always present crowd of football fanatics that seem to follow you."

"Easy, kid," he laughed. "I'm in disguise!"

She eyed him skeptically. "Really? A USC baseball hat is your attempt at a disguise?"

He shrugged and pulled her in for another hug. "It'll have to work. Did you really think I'd pass on the opportunity to see what my sister's boyfriend does for a living?"

Addison rolled her eyes and sighed. "Silly overprotective big brothers"

"Damn right!" Gus teased. "Speaking of which, shouldn't you be wearing something more than that?" he asked motioning down to her short red leather mini skirt and looking towards Bucky for backup.

Bucky laughed sarcastically. "Yeah, I've been threatened with bodily harm several times if I say anything."

"Dude, you grew up with the mob! Are you really going to stand there and tell me you're scared of this pip-squeak?"

"You do remember that we taught her how to hit… Trust me when I say she paid attention."

Addison was about to make a smart ass comment when the house lights dimmed and the crack of Eliza's drumsticks sounded out, capturing all of Bucky's attention instantly.

Gus leaned over to him. "So… you're dating a drummer… hot!"

Bucky shook his head and smiled. "Yes, she is."

Addison wanted to tease him, but the second that the spotlight hit Zed, her mouth started to water. She licked her lower lip and pulled it between her teeth. She quickly caught herself and glanced nervously in her brother's direction. Fortunately, he was too wrapped up watching Eliza to have noticed.

"I'm going to um..." she pointed towards the stage. "Um… warm-up. Enjoy the show, Gus!"

He laughed and pulled her into a hug. "You are so screwed, kid," he whispered before kissing the top of her head.

"Trust me, I know," she said pulling back and flashing him a smile. "I'll send Bonzo out when they finish. Take it easy on him. He's good people."

"I know. He wouldn't still be dating my sister if he wasn't… Doesn't mean I can't make him sweat a little."

She rolled her eyes and kissed his cheek.

ZzZzZzZzZ

"Thank you Green Bay!" Zed screamed into the microphone "The Acey's are up next. Get ready to have your asses rocked!" He unplugged his guitar, took a bow, and followed Eliza and Bonzo off the stage.

"Great show guys!" Addison said as she hugged Eliza. "Bonz, Gus is out by the bar with Bucky. He's expecting you to hang out."

Bonzo sighed. "Way to kill my post-show endorphins, Princess."

"Anytime!" she said sweetly with a wave as he and Eliza walked past her and towards the stage exit. The second the door closed she spun around and launched herself into Zed's arms.

"Woah..." he laughed as he caught her, guiding her legs around his waist as she attacked his mouth. "I thought I was the reckless one."

"Tracey is watching the stage door," she giggled mischievously, her hands raking through his sweaty hair "We've got a couple minutes."

"Whatever shall we do?" he teased, tightening his grip on her.

A warning knock sounded on the door.

With a groan, Addison slid down and straightened her skirt. "Apparently nothing..." she whispered just as Tracey opened the door.

"Sorry, doll-face! Bucky's on his way. Some technical issues with the lighting change the stage manager needs to talk to him about?"

"Thanks, Tracey." She sighed.

Zed grabbed her shoulder and spun her back around crashing his lips to hers. "Knock 'em dead baby. I'll be waiting for you after."

ZzZzZzZzZ

"Did you grab me one?" Zed asked with a smirk as he walked up to Bonzo and Gus at the bar.

Bonzo slid over a bottle of beer. "Of course man!"

Gus leaned over and shook Zed's hand. "I was just telling James here that you guys were pretty damn good."

"Thanks, Gus."

"Way better than that band you were in back home… Although at least then you didn't have half-naked women throwing themselves at you."

Zed laughed and took a sip of his beer. "Perks of the job! It comes with the territory."

"Mmhmm… you know Addie is like a sister to me," Gus glared in a warning. "Don't you think it's a bit disrespectful?"

"Adds knows I'm all hers. As far as the fans go… she gets it. Trust me. Just watch when she takes the stage!"

Right on cue deep throbbing notes from a keyboard sounded out from the still darkened stage.

"What the..." Bonzo said looking over. "Well, that's new… since when do their sets start like this?"

Zed smiled as a seductive bass line picked up the melody and the lights flashed on illuminating Addison as she stepped up to the microphone. "Since my girl remembered who she is. Get used to opening dude… As long as she's calling the shots, we're screwed."

"Pretty boys, they didn't teach me things I didn't know  
They don't have the thing that I need  
But they don't know they don't  
You got that old thing about ya and I can't hide my feels..."

"I wonder who this one's about," Gus said as he clinked his bottle against Zeds.

"Pretty girls, they always die out, need another sex appeal

I said, come on, give zero fucks about it  
Come on, I know I'm gonna get hurt..." She leaned over and ran her hand down the face of one of the men that was already drooling at her feet.

"Come on, give zero fucks about it  
Come on..."

Gus laughed and elbowed Zed. "Yeah… I guess she does get it!"

"Keep playing my heartstrings faster and faster  
You can be just what I want, my true disaster  
Keep playing my heartstrings faster and faster  
You can be just what I want, my true disaster..."

"She's a goddamn rockstar!" Gus exclaimed loudly, trying to be heard over the escalated crowd noise as they watched Addison dance across the stage.

"She always has been!" Zed yelled back to him, unable to hide the adoration in his eyes as he watched her come alive more and more in the spotlight.

"Pretty girls, they like it fancy, but you don't keep it clean  
We get dirty and we go hard, some things we don't mean  
They tell me, 'No one's gonna get ya," I'm just straight up mad  
A fool in love, roll up beside me, and you're just as bad..."

He knew the second she spotted him in the crowd. Everyone else disappeared around them and her voice took on an even more seductive tone as she sang only to him.

"I said, come on, give zero fucks about it  
Come on, I know I'm gonna get hurt  
Come on, give zero fucks about it  
Come on..." she threw him a wink and grabbed a shot that someone in the crowd was offering her, downing it before she belt out the rest of the song.

"Keep playing my heartstrings faster and faster  
You can be just what I want, my true disaster  
Keep playing my heartstrings faster and faster  
You can be just what I want, my true disaster!"

As the crowd around them cheered for more, Gus draped his arm around Zed. "That sounded a hell of a lot better than it did this afternoon in my parent's house," he laughed before suddenly growing serious. "You hurt her, and I promise I will tell her brother... You'll have to deal with both of us. And I will not hesitate to beat your ass."

Zed swallowed loudly and nodded.

Gus smiled and patted him on the shoulder. He pulled out his phone and held it up towards the stage. "I've got to record this..."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **** This chapter took me FOREVER to write. Between this crazy quarantine and back to school stress and life in general being a far cry from normal, I'm spread insanely thin at the moment. So with that being said, I apologize for the late update and the general suckiness of this chapter. It's not nearly what I was hoping for, but I needed to get it over with so I can move on to the next round of craziness awaiting these characters. As always, your thoughts and feedback are appreciated!**

******If you're looking for a new story to read, go check out A FATHER'S PERSPECTIVE by the lovely SWChica2005******

**SONGS USED IN THIS CHAPTER:**

**Shiver- Julia Clara**

**Lover (remix)- Taylor Swift ft. Shawn Mendes**

**True Disaster- Tove Lo**


End file.
